Conflict Resolution Exam 2

Tactics of Compromise?

-Give and take; one person gives up something to get something and the other does the same (rather than both people working together to get what they want)

What are the types of forces involved with IPV? Explain them.

-Impelling/inhibiting Impelling: forces pushing you toward IPV (ex: a stressful situation or an aggressive attitude) Inhibiting: forces pulling you away from IPV (ex: a nonagressive disposition) -Distal = not present in the immediate environment, but will have an impact (ex: child remembering past occurrences of parents violently fighting, affecting child's future attitude toward IPV) -Dispositional: personality characteristics that impel/inhibit IPV -Situational: aspects of the environment leading to impelling/inhibiting IPV

What are some Avoidance tactics?

-Pretending to be busy -Making jokes/changing the subject -Direct denial: "Nothing's wrong." -Noncommital (neutral) comments -Topic shift/management

What are the lower-power person's approaches to balancing power?

-Restraint -Focusing on interdependence -Calm persistence -Staying actively engaged -Metacommunication (being verbally explicit about the communication going on)

What are some tactics of Domination?

-Speaking first -interrupting others -criticisms & attacks -rejecting others' ideas -hostility, sarcasm, threats -denial of responsibility

What are some conditions affecting your own outcome in a conflict?

-Trade-offs: you may get a win, but will the relationship suffer? -Priorities: which conflicts/domains matter more to you? -Realms of conflict

Tactics of collaboration?

-figure out your interests & their interests -using descriptive (rather than judgmental) statements when talking about the situation -self-disclosure and disclosure of the other person (explaining why you did what you did and asking them the same thing) -NOT mind-reading -qualifying statements -supportive remarks -concessions (take responsibility for what you did wrong)

Name and describe the three ways of looking at power.

1) Designated : power of the position; because someone is in a certain role, they have the responsibility to make decisions, authority to enforce their way, etc. (ex: Your professor is responsible for giving you grades, and has the authority to give you good or bad grades.) 2) Integrative: looking at everyone in a group; everyone has some source of power; making power out to be a balance in a relationship (ex: Parents thinking, "What can we do to address our child's behavioral problems" 3) Distributive: power OVER someone; mindset of "either I have power, or you do."

Describe the idea of power and counter-power.

pAB = dBA pBA = dAB You become powerful by making others dependent on you, while others can do the same by increasing your dependence on them.

What are the various types of power?

-Coercive: punishing power -Reward: giving gifts/favors -Referent: (under interpersonal/communication) power of charisma -Expert: recognition as possessing a certain skill set (ex: Call the IT dept., they'll know what to do.) -Informational: recognition as possessing certain information needed for a task (ex: Call the IT dept., they have the password we need.) -Ecological: ability to manipulate the environment (ex: guy with the desk by the thermostat)

What are some orientations to power?

-Designated power -Either/or power -Both/and power -Power denial

How do you know if you're stuck in one conflict style?

-Do you carry a conflict style "label"? -Does your current conflict response seem like the only natural one? -Do you use your conflict style for every conflict? -Do you have a set number of responses that follow the same pattern? -Do others seem to react to you the same way in every conflict?

What are the three kinds of trust? Explain each one.

1. Calculus-based trust = based off of rewards of compliance & non-compliance -Easiest type to develop; you don't need to know someone personally to have a calculus-based trust with them -Ex: If you make bad food the food critic will write a bad review. If you make good food, he'll write a good review. -Ex: Pre-nuptual agreements 2. Knowledge-based trust = based off of past experiences with that person -"I can trust you because I know you." -Ex: faith in God! We can trust him because he sent his son to die for us. 3. Identification-based trust = trust based on the relationship -Ex: "My son wouldn't abandon us. This family is too important to harm it."

Give examples of the three kinds of aggression.

1. Direct - verbally or physically attacking the person who wronged you 2. Indirect - spreading a rumor about the person that wronged you 3. Displaced - taking your anger out on your cat

What are some ways to deal with power imbalances in a relationship?

1. Lower power person (LPP): decrease your dependence on the other person - Be persistent -Remain engaged without backing down too quickly -Change your goals -Communicate the value you offer the other 2. Higher power person (HPP): decrease the other person's dependence on you -Transfer your power; let the other person decide (Caution: this could backfire - if they take advantage of you, you may turn around and pick up your power again to use against them) 3. HPP: don't use all the sources of power available to you -Ex: physical abuse can be a source of power, but definitely one NOT to use in personal relationships

What are Cialdini's weapons of social influence?

1. Scarcity -if something is rare, there's more of a social influence to get it -Plays off of peoples' reactivity -Ex: "For a limited time only..." 2. Reciprocity -we feel obligated to return favors when people do things for us -Ex: Car sales people starting off with a high price, then "doing us a favor" by dropping it low to get us to accept the deal (repay the favor) 3. Liking -Ingratiation tactics (doing/saying things that people like) enhance liking 4. Commitment/consistency -Foot-in-the-door -Door-in-the-face -Ex: Salespeople often find ways to elicit small commitments in anticipation of larger ones later on 5. Authority -trying to get people to be influenced by authority figures 6. Social proof/validation = evaluation of an item based on how much people like it -Ex: In business, you have two kinds of counters: counting down: number of units available (plays off of scarcity) counting up: number of units sold (plays off of social proof/validation)

What are the three different approaches to conflict styles that we can use?

2 Styles: cooperation & competitition 4 Styles: yielding, contending, problem solving, and inaction 5 Styles: accommodating, competition, collaboration, avoiding, compromise

What is collective bargaining?

= Instead of individual people negotiating a deal, you have representatives of both sides acting on their behalf (ex: Paige Turner's Rep "vs." Best books Rep)

Define referent power. What power currency would this fall under?

= power of charisma; (could include good listening skills, or the general ability to draw people to yourself Under category of: Interpersonal/Communication

Define Ecological power. What power currency would this fall under?

= the ability to control/manipulate the environment (Ex: You're the person in the office with the desk closest to the thermostat, and can control how hot/cold it gets, therefore you also control a degree of reward/punishment with others)

What does the Strategic Choice Model say?

= the conflict strategy we pick is based on our DUAL CONCERN and PERCEIVED FEASIBILITY (Dual concern - how much you care about your outcome vs. the other person's outcome) (Perceived feasibility - how well you think you can manage the style you choose)

Define interaction dynamics.

= the interaction of 2 parties over time & the influence that their conflict styles have on each other

Advantages and disadvantages of the Avoidance Approach?

Advantages: -Give time to cool off (timing might not be right) -Lets you delay to plan your strategy -Sometimes beneficial if the issue isn't worth confronting over Disadvantages: -Likely to result in a later explosion -Negative long-term effects -May indicate that the relationship doesn't matter to you -You never deal with the pt. of disagreement -May result in Avoid-Criticize Loop

Advantages & disadvantages of accommodation?

Advantages: -Resolves the conflict quickly (in the other person's favor) -Makes the other person feel good -Good to do after you make a big mistake Disadvantages: -You're not getting your outcome -If followed as a pattern, may develop dependencies in the relationship

Advantages & disadvantages of Domination?

Advantages: -decisive, quick option -you get your outcome -certain circumstances, this may be the best way to go (some workplaces view this tactic as important) Disadvantages: -relational consequences -may be seen as too aggressive, unempathic, or stubborn

Advantages & disadvantages of Compromise?

Advantages: -quicker than collab. -morally accepted -feel good afterwards Disadvantages: -May be missing opportunity for better, more creative solutions -Better short-term than long-term

Advantages & disadvantages of Collaboration?

Advantages: -you come up with creative solutions that benefit everyone -shows the other person that the relationship matters to you Disadvantages: -time-consuming -we may not care about the problem enough to engage -only works if both parties go with it -you may lack the skills to come up with a creative solution

What is the difference between affect, mood, and emotion?

Affect - term for things that are VALENCED (charged); think of it has "hot cognition" rather than "cold cognition" Mood - long-lasting way you feel; most likely to influence your thinking (ex: If you feel a certain way but for no specific reason, that's mood.) Emotion - how you feel in regards to a particular point in time; situation-based (ex: If you feel a certain way because of something that happened, that's emotion.)

Is alcohol an impelling or inhibiting force in IPV?

Alcohol is an inhibiting force; it inhibits your RESTRAINT to engage in IPV (particularly SCV). Therefore, if you ingest alcohol, you're more likely to have SCV.

What is the difference between being assertive, aggressive, and violent?

Assertive: if someone takes your toy, you ask for it back = pushing for your opinion but not with malicious intent Aggressive: if someone takes your toy, you kick them in the shin and take it back = intending to harm someone to get what you want; can be instrumental (in order to get something) or hostile (aggression as an end) Violent: if someone takes your toy, you kick them in the shin, judo-throw them to the ground, and repeatedly punch them in the face = physical aggression with the intent to cause serious physical harm

Define metacommunication

Being verbally explicit about the communication going on between you and someone else

What is "captainitis"?

Doing whatever the authority says, no matter if they're right or wrong.

What does dual concern determine? What does our perceived feasibility determine?

Dual concern determines PREFERENCE. Perceived feasibility determines ADOPTION (what style you actually choose).

What is involved in Schachter & Singer 's theory of emotion? What does this imply about emotions?

Emotion is all about attribution. You see a scary bear --> you feel physiological response & give it a cognitive label If emotions are all about attribution, this implies that misattribution of emotion may occur. (ex: if you walk across a scary bridge & meet an attractive person, you may think you're in love!)

What are the types of IPV? Describe them.

IPV = Intimate Partner Violence 1. Situational couple violence (SCV) - erupts from a situtation (heated argument); not pre-planned 2. Intimate terrorism (IT) - physical abuse + other tactics used to get and keep control of the other person in the relationship 3. Mutual violent control (MVC) - both partners engage in intimate terrorism 4. Violent resistance (VR) - violence perpetuated by victims toward their abusive partners (self-defense)

Is intimate partner violence usually one-sided or reciprocal?

IPV is usually RECIPROCAL.

Which type of IPV are males more likely than females to engage in?

IT

Explain the pAB = dBA way of looking at conflict.

Idea that the power you have over other people equals the dependence that the other person has on you. -Stems from mindset that power is GIVEN

What is our general perception of power in our relationships (particularly in conflict)?

In conflict: each person firmly believes that the other person has more power. (almost always inaccurate)

Who is more often the recipient of intimate violence, men or women?

MEN!! We hear more reports about women, because we get injured more from IPV than men do.

How is social influence different from power?

Social influence - rather than being about power, it's more about influencing people to get them to do what you want (Ex: Girl Scouts having social influence over their buyers that they sell cookies too; a big weapon of influence is scarcity)

Is being stuck in one conflict style always bad?

Not always. Being stuck in one style is not as bad as FEELING stuck in one style.

Signs of overuse and underuse of Compromise?

Overuse if: -losing sight of bigger picture -wanting to solve conflicts quicker rather than better Underuse if: -having difficulty making concessions (wanting all or nothing)

Signs of overuse and underuse of Collaboration?

Overuse if: -spending too much time on less important conflicts; sometimes you need to LET IT GOOOO! -some situations are more efficiently solved with other approaches Underuse if: -you frequently miss opportunities to come up with creative solutions to problems

Signs of overuse and underuse of Accommodation?

Overuse if: -you get into "nice contests" with people, trying to accommodate more than them -you rush to accommodate to get people "in your debt" -accommodation used strategically to get something you want later Underuse if: -Trouble building up goodwill -you're viewed as stubborn & unreasonable

Signs of overuse and underuse of Domination?

Overuse if: -you surround yourself with "yes people" Underuse if: -you tend to feel powerless in conficts -feel uncomfortable standing up for yourself -not good at competing or fear competition

What does the negotiation perspective say about the effects of affect?

Positive affect during negotiation may lead to less than ideal outcomes (b/c "happiness leads to mindlessness") But an overly negative state can also hinder you from analyzing the situation accurately; could lead to escalation & retaliation from the other person. So, if you're going into a negotiation, it's best to enter with a neutral mood.

What are the various kinds of power currencies in conflict?

RICE! Resource control = your ability to control rewards & punishments (ex: Dad threatening to spank if daughter teases a girl at school again.) -Amount of resource control you have depends on how much you can actually follow through on your reward/punishment -Involves reward power & coercive power (your ability to offer rewards/punishments in exchange for behaviors) Interpersonal linkages = your connections with other people (that are valuable) - While you may not possess the power yourself, you have access to the person with that power -Ex: This is big in the business world, like with me linking Emmanuel/Gbemi and my Dad together into the same company. Communication Skills = your ability to influence others and persuade them; based on a personal connection you have with someone -Ex: In high school debates, everyone wanted Jake on their team because he was great at influencing people Expertise = based on the recognition you possess certain skills that would be necessary for the task at hand -Ex: Caleb, the pre-med advisor, holds a lot of power with the students he advises because he has all the pre-med expertise

What is a deliberate/purposive influences and how does this describe power?

Rather than being an unintentional influence on someone, power implies a deliberate, purposive attempt to influence another person.

What is reactive devaluation?

Rejecting an idea because of the source. Ex: If an ex-husband suggests a plan to his ex-wife on how they should divide up their stuff, she may reject the idea (even if it's fair) just because it came from him.

What is the difference between rights and interests? What does a distressed system look like concerning power, rights, and interests? What does an effective system look like concerning power, rights, & interests?

Rights: core concerns; legal/constitutional concerns Interests: goals/desires; something definite you want out of a conflict In addition, the issue may be about power itself; these kinds of issues are harder to solve. Distressed: upside-down triangle, power largest part, rights 2nd largest, interests smallest Effective: rights-side up triangle; power smallest part, rights 2nd largest, interests largest part

Which type of IPV are females more likely than males to engage in?

SCV

Signs of overuse and underuse of Avoidance?

Signs of overuse: -Feeling like "walking on eggshells" -Feeling like you can never say no Signs of underuse: -debating everything -always giving contrary opinion -feeling overwhelmed all the time -need to frame things in more non-threatening ways

What are the three biggest differences between mood & emotion?

Specificity Duration Intensity

What is the difference between a style, strategy, and tactic?

Style = your natural go-to conflict style Strategy = your chosen style when approaching a certain kind of conflict Tactic = specific behaviors that you use in your chosen styles

What is the most common conflict styles assessment? What are the dimensions that your conflict style is based on?

TKI Uses the dimensions of assertiveness (concern for self) and cooperativeness (concern for others) to analyze conflict style

What did Finkel's study reveal about IPV?

There are impelling and inhibiting forces that push you toward IPV or keep you from engaging in IPV. If there are *strong impelling* and *weak inhibiting* forces, you're more likely to have SCV.

Differentiate between: a threat, promise, warning, & recommendation.

Threat: (-) sanction, can follow through Promise: (+) sanction, can follow through Warning: (-) sanction, cannot follow through/control Recommendation: (+) sanction, cannot follow through/control

What is an eclectic approach? What does this approach imply?

Using different conflict styles that go with different situations and people in your life Implies that our conflict styles are NOT FIXED. We can choose different ones to adopt as we learn them.

How are verbal and physical aggression related?

Verbal aggression predicts and is associated with physical abuse.

How do we often use emotion in a conflict?

We often use emotions (affect) as a source of information in a conflict. (Ex: if we experience a lot of negative emotion during a conflict, we think it went badly.) -If you don't have cognitive information about something, you're more likely to judge a situation based on how you feel about it.

What is the principle of lesser interest?

Whoever is less interested in the relationship holds more power in the relationship

What is the Avoid-Criticize loop?

You criticize the person but don't engage them in a conflict (you may complain to a third party about a problem with your roommate but never talk to your roommate directly)