HD Final

Bowlby: Be familiar with the general history that led to the development of attachment theory, some facts that made Bowlby doubt the secondary-drive theory of infant-caregiver attachment, the influences of work by such researchers as Lorenz and Harlow, and the new perspective on separation anxiety.

Background: View of infant attachment pre-1950 Why do babies get attached to their parents or mothers? The standard explanation was because they associate them with hunger drive. They get attached to the people who feed them. It is a secondary drive idea. Primary are characteristics of all humans. You do not need to learn anything. Two examples are food and sex.Secondary drives are things we want but only because have learned to want them because they are associated with secondary drives. An example is money. Money can get you food. Secondary drive theory of attachment. Theory was babies would get attached to whoever was feeding them. Post-war Reality: Large Numbers of (short and long-term) orphans. Their reactions did not fit the theory of secondary drive theory They were even refusing food. They were distressed at the loss of the person. Nor did results of contemporary studies The WHO report this in 1951. They need a warm continuous association with at least one person (a relationship.)It was the disruption in the relationship, which was causing the problems with the orphans. Konrad Lorenz - He did work with geese. He found that geese imprint on baby goslings. Goslings would imprint onto things no related to food. Harlow's experiments - with monkeys describe in other question Bowlby hypothesis: We need to form a bond to survive because it takes humans a long time to develop. Bowlby proposes that we have a behaviorally regulatory system that makes sure we keep track of the important people in our life. If we get separated then we make a big fuss to bring them back to us. Because if they are not there we could die from that because we have no protection.

In theory, why it is that people tend to hurt the ones whom they love the most?

This is because we interact with the ones we love most often. We do't have the defense of unfamiliarity. People who are close to use know our personal sore spots and weaknesses. The potential implication of losing them is more serious (because of attachment.) The closer the relationship, the stronger the feelings are.

Hofer: In this paper Hofer uses findings from animal models to address three questions relevant to human attachment. Be familiar with his answers to all three.

(1) What creates an attachment bond? -attachment is a physiological tie -pups were being regulated by maternal features: food, warmth, touch. -physiological co-regulation applies to adult attachment bonds -predispositions can be created prenatally to respond preferentially to specific maternal scents and sounds. These predispositions prepare the way for the next phase in the development of attachment. (2) Why is early maternal separation stressful? -physiologically pups could not be regulated by mother -behavioral and physiological systems of the infant rat was responding to the loss of one or another of the components (e.g., nutrient, thermal/metabolic, or sensorimotor) of the infant's previous interaction with its mother and that the complex response to separation was due to the withdrawal of all these components at once. (3) How can early relationships have lasting effects? -early weaning experiment illustrates is that when all maternal regulators are withdrawn early, a number of physiological and behavioral systems are altered in their developmental paths and create a changing pattern of vulnerability over the life span. -variations in qualities of mother-infant relationships among humans thus appear to have deep biological roots in the form of their capacity to shape children's psychological and biological responses to their environment—effects that extend into adulthood.

In contrast to conflict research, Fincham and others have emphasized positive interactions. What study method was used and what were the findings? (Hint: "magical" ratio)

- Fincham (2003) found that there is an important positive-negative ratio of interactions between couples - The "magic" ratio is 5:1 (10:1 is even better!) - People have the implicit notion that as long as negative and positive interactions balance each other out, their relationship is fine - It turns out that for every one negative comment, it takes a minimum of 5 positive interactions to counterbalance it - In happy couples, the average ratio is about 10:1 - They measured these interactions by having participants record how they felt after each interaction with the other person

Gottman & Levenson: See lecture notes for most important findings.

- Gottman's formula can predict with over 90% accuracy which couples will divorce and which will not - He started with clinical training as a couple's therapist and two factors drove him crazy (People were clueless about how they were communicating, people typically came to therapy at stage 8 in the uncoupling process) - Gottman's lab was an apartment - Couples checked in for the weekend and cameras monitored them - He wired people and gathered biological samples to monitor heart rate and hormones throughout the exchanges Procedure - On check in day, couples didn't see each other for at least 8 hours before arrival - He wanted to capture reuniting moment in the day - He selected a topic of disagreement or source of conflict and asked participants to have a discussion about it - He did this by completed questionnaires about the things couples argue about most (religion, in-laws, sex) Main discovery: Four Horsemen of Apocalypse 1. Global criticism 2. Defensiveness 3. Contempt 4. Stonewalling These four factors are predictive of divorce because they run counter to the things that help cement a close interpersonal bond Three major types of conflict reduction 1. Validation 2. Affection 3. Humor

In general, what are the effects of loneliness on the immune system and sleep quality? What are other physical health correlates of loneliness?

- Lonely people have fewer killer-T cells - Lonely people get less restful sleep and wake more often than non-lonely people - Loneliness is also linked to obesity and Alzheimer's - Loneliness is also related to hypertrophic cardiomyopathy - Hypertrophic cardiomyopathy is the medical condition of having a broken heart - When people experience the loss of a loved one, the muscle around the heart thickens, this can lead to death - Research indicates that the effect size of loneliness is greater than dietary factors, exercise and smoking, with regard to influencing a person's risk of premature death

Researchers have identified specific periods in a relationship when breakup (including divorce) is more likely than at other periods. What is the significance of 2 years (+/- 6 months), four years, seven years, and 14 years?

- Many breakups occur 2 years (+/- 6 months) into the relationship - The point is the end of infatuation - If you will get divorced, it is most likely at 4 years of marriage - This is called a modal divorce because it is argued to be reproductive cycle-related - 4 years is about the length of human reproductive cycle - At the end of 4 years, most couples would have 1 offspring that could be cared for by larger group, so it is less essential for reproductive partners to remain together - Another argument is that if a couple marries and breaks up because of the end of infatuation, the process of uncoupling takes about 4 years - Many couples divorce after 7 years. This is called median divorce - 50% of divorces happen by the end of the 7th year - These early divorcers experience negative affect, contempt, and negative interactions - The last major point of divorce is at 14 years - These are late divorcers whose breakup is usually offspring-related. Usually when their first child reaches adolescence - These couples experience an absence of positive emotion - They don't divorce because of too many fights, but because of a lack of happy interactions - They are not miserable, just unsatisfied, and often want to wait until kids are old enough - Many breakups occur during May, September, and December - These are academic term-related

What are the effects of loneliness on overall stress levels, the stressfulness of specific events, the likelihood of seeking support, and the degree of comfort derived from support?

-Loneliness is the opposite of having 1 person that you can trust, be yourself with, and count on. -Loneliness itself is stressful -Loneliness causes degenerative effects on the corpus callosum -Loneliness causes the same events to feel more stressful than if you were not lonely -During stressful times, the lonely seek support less often and are less comforted by it ***Not sure if all of this is answer***

What are three common characteristics of breakups in relationships that have survived beyond the initial infatuation phase?

1) Unilateral (initiator vs partner) 2) A process that unfolds over time for the initiator (rarely sudden) 3) Potential alternatives have been identified

Gottman observed that even well-functioning couples sometimes get into the negative cycle of conflict resolution, but they are skilled at interrupting the cycle. What are the three strategies they use for reducing conflict?

1. Validation - If partner makes a complaint, there is acknowledgement - There is no, "yes, but..." 2. Affection - A partner may touch the other person in a region of the body that is more intimate 3. Humor - This interrupts tension and gets the couple to laugh

Within relationship science, commitment is defined as the intention to continue a relationship. According to research findings on commitment, what are the five major reasons that people decide to stay with their partners? (Hint: 3 "types" plus two additional reasons)

3 Types of Commitment and Reasons to Stay in the Relationship: 1) "I want to" - personal commitment 2) "I ought to" - moral commitment 3) "I have to" - structural commitment You can't end the relationship because you don't have the means to be on your own. 2 Additional Reason to Stay: 1) Investment: You feel like you've spent so much time and energy on it, you own things, etc 2) Comparison Level for Alternatives: In order to maintain the strength of the relationship, you need to think about your relationship/partner is better than other potential mates if one person starts thing that other potential mates might be better than their current mater, the relationship will become very unstable to combat this people will actively denigrate potential alternatives following an interaction

According to research, we use the word love to describe three very different constellations of feelings. What are these three and how do they relate to social behavioral systems? What is the time course of pair bonding in terms of the three types of love and related behavioral systems?

According to research, we use the word love to describe three very different constellations of feelings. What are these three and how do they relate to social behavioral systems? What is the time course of pair bonding in terms of the three types of love and related behavioral systems? Three types of love (when you love someone, it includes at least one of these three) "I feel cared for" prototype: child for parent. Behavioral system: attachment. Adaptive challenge: survive to reproductive age "I feel care for" prototype: parent for child. Behavioral system: parental/caregiving. Adaptive challenge: nurture offspring "I feel passionate about" romantic/sexual partners. Behavioral system: sexual mating. Adaptive challenge: mate (reproduce) Types of love follow different trajectories along the time course of pair bonding • Feeling passionate about someone follows the same trajectory as infatuation, such that it occurs intensely and diminishes somewhat over time • Feeling cared for (attachment) and feeling care for (caregiving) both require more time to develop and are less certain in their development

Bowlby argued that early bonding experiences result in the development of an "internal working model" that tends to be self-perpetuating. How does this model work at the levels of experience, expectations, behaviors, the ANS and the HPA?

All of us have mentally represented notion of how attachment relationship works for us. If you want a clue about how it works ask yourself when you are upset what do you do? Do you reach out to others? Are you confident that will help? This is not just happening at the level of cognition and behavior. The way you react to stress is influenced by early experiences with the people who are most important in your life. Experiences → Expectations → Behaviors → Experiences Experiences: We all have a notion of how the attachment system works for us. Expectations: We remember how we were treated which sets up our expectations for how people will respond to us if we need comfort or reassurance. Behaviors: If we expect to not be comforted or rejected, we are unlikely to seek comfort when distressed. *Self-perpetuating cycle - internal working model is ingrained in us at level of neurotransmitters.

Research has shown that the very same person can be judged as more or less attractive depending on a variety of situational factors. Be familiar with such factors as physiological arousal, mood, comparison standards, perceived scarcity, alcohol consumption, the color red (also pink), bodily scent, vocal pitch, and menstrual cycle phase and how each affects interpersonal attraction.

Arousal is a situational factor influencing attractions. The very same person is perceived as being more attractive when one is physiologically aroused. The bridge study showed more male participants called the female confederate over a high bridge than a low one. If you are physiologically aroused at the time of meeting, you will find the very same person much more sexually attractive. This have been shown in studies involving scary movies as well as at the gym. Things that make your heart pound cause you to be more sexually attracted to people around you at the time. This does not have lasting effects. Couple satisfaction has been shown to increased with the more activities that cause physiological arousal. The same person gets a higher attractiveness rating when the rater has a positive mood. Examples are when watching a happy (vs. sad) clip, listening to positive (vs. negative) affect inducing music, favorable (vs. unfavorable) performance feedback, and comfortable (vs. uncomfortable) room temperature. In a comparison standard studies, males rated female attractiveness. ½ were primed with an episode of "Charlie's Angels" and the other ½ wasn't. The results showed the males who watched the episode found the females less attractive. The same person is rated less attractive depending on the comparison. Perceived scarcity is the concept that the more choices you have the less attractive each individual person appears. Bar studies have shown as it gets later at night and people leave the people who are left are more attractive. Alcohol consumption also affect attractiveness. In a study, some participants got vodka tonic and some got water tonic. They did not know which they had. The same faces got higher attractiveness rating from the participants who consumer alcohol. In many non-human primate species there are color changes that signal reproductive capabilities as well as opportunities for mating. Studies have shown that men found the same woman more attractive when wearing a red shirt. Wearing read significants increases physical attractiveness but has no effects on perception of intelligence, niceness, etc. In addition, women are more likely to wear red or pink at peak fertility than at other parts of their cycle. Lastly, males were asked to pick red or blue for their team color. Males that picked red has higher testosterone levels than those who picked blue. Major histocompatibility complex (MHC): codes for disease and pathogen resistance and alleles are co-dominant. Therefore, there is an advantage to the offspring by mating with someone whose MHC differs from your own. Females prefer the scents of males who MHC differ from them. However, normal contraceptive use and pregnancy have the reverse effect on women's preferences. They like the smell of men with similar MHC. If you are in a mating mood, you like the smell of someone who would maximize the disease resistance of your offspring. Women who were in relationships with men whose MHC was similar to them were just as in love but they were less sexually attracted and were more likely to cheat. Men find the body odor of women more attractive when women are in the follicular phase of their cycle. Lap dancers earn more during the follicular phase. The earnings are lower at other phases of if the dance takes contraceptive pills. Women were recording voicing 4 vowels. Men rated the voices. Men were shown photos of women with a voice. Theme rated the attractiveness of the combination of women's voices and faces. They either heard the voice independent of the face or they heard the voice and saw the photo. Women with higher pitched voiced were rated as more attractive. Faces paired with higher voices were rated as more attractive. Pitch affect attractiveness ratings of the faces as well as the voices. Pitch communicated information about age and gender since female voices increase in pitch at puberty and later in life the pitch decreases. Women find men with low pitch voices more attractive. Puberty cause the male voice to lower.

Reis & Aron: Focus on their brief history of love research, what love is, why it matters, and how it operates.

Love: what is it, why does it matter, and how does it operate? Reis & Aron • Plato's symposium: systematic and seminal analysis, theoretical model of love • Freud: importance of childhood experiences, impact of subconscious, role of defenses • Margaret Mead: cultural anthro, cultural variations in the expression of love and sexuality • Kurt Lewin: modeled the possibility of studying social processes in the lab • Harlow and Bowlby: maternal love and caregiving could be observed and investigated with the same standards as other behavioral phenomena • What love is: passionate love (most research) vs. Companionate love (includes intimacy and commitment). In Fehr's bottom-up study: trust and caring are highly prototypical of love. Information processing shows that central features of the prototype are often assumed in various ways even if absent. Identification of underlying dimensions of prototypical features: intimacy, commitment, and passion. • Why love matters: evolutionary regulatory mechanism designed to solve specific interpersonal problems with adaptational significance. Passionate love solves the attraction problem by creating cognitive/emotion/behavior changes that make commitment to a mate worthwhile. Companionate love solves the problem of staying together for the kids, and is a communal relationship (partner will be responsive to your needs and vice versa). • Social relatedness and health: perceived partner responsiveness, biological mechanisms • Problems: suicides, anxiety, depression, unrequited love is common, rejection, violence, abandonment, jealousy, loss, and grief • How love operates: Passionate love is linked to arousal and novelty, difficulties concentrating on other things, intense desires for closeness and contact, and idealized perception of loved ones. Companionate love is linked with intimacy and bonding, when partners are perceived to be responsive to one another's needs, provide secure base and safe haven, understanding and valuing the self, relationship maintenance. • Animal research: birds and mammals have distinct brain systems for courtship, mating, and parenting (sex drive, attraction, attachment) • Love is the defined as the desire to enter, maintain, or expand a close, connected and ongoing relationship with another person or other entity o Entity - pets, fictional characters, deities • History of love research: o Starting with Plato's Symposium o Charles Darwin - reproductive success as a central process for evolution o Sigmund Freud - childhood experiences, powerful impact of motives operating outside of awareness, role of defenses in shaping behavioral expression of motives, role of sexuality as a force in human behavior o Margaret Mead - described cultural variations in expression of love and sexuality. Lead researches to consider influence of socialization and to recognize cultural variation in many aspects of love. o Kurt Lewin - modeled possibility of social processes being studied in the lab o Harlow and Bowlby - maternal love and caregiver. Started movement for studying biologically based approaches o Hazan and Shaver (1987) - adult romantic love as an attachment process • Passionate love - state of intense longing for union with another • Companionate love - affection we feel for those with whom our lives are deeply entwined • Why love matters? o Can make our lives better o Major source of misery and pain that can make life worse

What is the Sexual Strategies Theory (SST) perspective on jealousy, and especially male-female differences in what triggers jealousy? What is the alternative "double-shot" hypothesis and the evidence to support it?

SST Hypothesis: There are sex differences in cost of infidelity so there should be sex differences in jealousy as well. For males: there is paternity uncertainty if the partner cheats For females: there is lose of partner resources if the partner engages in emotional attachment with another person SST predicts that males will be more jealous about sexual infidelity, and females will be more jealous about emotional infidelity. Double-Shot Hypothesis: continuous measure of each kin of infidelity eliminated sex differences. Both males and females were equally upset by both emotional and sexual infidelity. This is in contrast with SST predictions. Explantation: When males think about sexual infidelity, they assume their partner much also be in love. When females think about emotional infidelity, they assume that their partner much as be having sex.

What makes attachment relationships different from other types of social ties? That is, what are the four defining features?

Attachment relationships facilitates survival while social ties do not. Attachment relationship have long term effects like the Stranger Situation. Attachment relationships are built on 4 features. There are 4 bond defining features of this attachment relationship. 1) Proximity maintenance - is my attachment figure near 2) Secure base - people that make us feel comfortable so that we can go out and do things, having our back 3) Separation distress - these are people we have a hard time being seperated from, seperation causes mild anxiety 4) Safe haven - when distress this is the person you seek for comfort

What is the evidence that social pain (e.g., being rejected or excluded) is similar to physical pain?

Social pain is defined as the kind of pain we experience when we are separated from the loved ones. This could be physical separation, breakups, death, social exclusion, or rejection. Social pain has similar responses like physical pain (screaming, crying.) The same parts of the brain are activated. The same neuroendocrine systems are involved.

What are the stages in the so-called "uncoupling process?" And especially, how is each stage experienced differently by the initiator and the partner?

Stage 1: Private Doubts - Although break-ups often seem to be sudden, they tend to begin with private doubts - The person initiating the break-up is often thinking about breaking up for a while before the other person knows it - Couples have normal fluctuations in personal commitment and during these times people may think about breaking up, but they usually keep these thoughts to themselves - Sometimes these doubts go away, but sometimes they don't, provokes anxiety Stage 2: Indirect Expressions - If doubts persist, they tend to leak out - The initiator tends to express his or her unhappiness indirectly - Initiator may start to complain about trivial matters or about things that are not new in the relationship - Ex - initiator may complain that the partner is messy even though he/she has always been messy - Often, the partner ignores these expressions - This makes the initiator frustrated because his or her partner isn't getting it - Initiator is no longer monitoring partner's gestures to figure out how they feel about him/her Stage 3: Turning Outward - Initiator starts to look for satisfaction outside of the relationship - May seek new friends, develop new hobbies, start a new diet, etc. - This is dangerous because it reduces couple similarity and increases propinquity to potential new partners Stage 4: Rewriting History - If doubts continue to persist, the initiator tends to start rewriting history - He or she may think the relationship was doomed from the start or that he or she is not a match for his or her partner - Rewriting history is the opposite of romantic idealization - At the beginning, people often think their relationship is perfect - At this point, people tend to think their relationship was never perfect Stage 5: Public Expression - This the point of no return - Once the initiator lets someone else know that he or she is thinking about breaking up, it is much more likely that they will break up - People can directly or indirectly let others know that they are thinking about breaking up - Vaughan found that the most common way people publicly expressed their desire to break up was by disrespecting their partner in front of other people Stage 6: Exploring Single Life - At this point, initiator tries out the idea of ending the relationship - May spend more time with single friends, become interested in talking to people who have recently broken up, find excuses for not wearing his or her wedding ring or become uninterested in making future plans - However, the initiator is still in the relationship at this point and hasn't told his or her partner that he or she is thinking about breaking up - Initiator wants to know people's stories about how they got out of relationships - Initiator shows a reluctance to commit to future plans with partner Stage 7: Taking Action - Initiator has still not told partner - If this goes on long enough, the initiator will take action - Often, he or she will do something to provoke his or her partner to initiate the break up - This makes it even clearer to the partner that something is wrong - It does not directly end the relationship but is suspicious - At this point, the partner finally becomes aware that something is wrong - People who think of leaving their long-term partner try to make accommodations for that person once they are gone - They may introduce the partner to people in the neighborhood who can help them via social support Stage 8: Trying - Partner's goal at this point is to repair the relationship - Initiator's goal is to convince the partner that the goal is not salvageable - Initiator by this point has already gone through all the thinking and weighing pros and cons - Couples go into couple's therapy at this point: when one person is out of it and the other person wants to find out how to fix serious problems Stage 9: Separating - The initiator is determined to end the relationship - Initiator typically leaves the partner with false hopes - Initiator asks for a break, space, or time to think - Self-serving reason for doing this may be a potential desire to go back to the relationship in the future or a fear that they may be wrong about ending it - Other-serving reason is that they don't want to be mean, so they let them down easy

Likes Attract Hypothesis

o Likes-attract hypothesis predicts that people choose similar mates • Research shows that self-perceptions predict mate selection more than gender • These theories are not mutually exclusive • Explain different aspects of variability in people What are your self perceptions? Buston and Emlen 2003. Adaptive strategy for stable partnerships. Assess your own quality as a mate. Form a mate preference based on self perception. Choose a mate of similar mate quality. Individuals who strongly possess a particular trait will make strong demands for the same trait in a partner. Predictor of what someone is looking for: his OWN characteristics. Categories in study: wealth/status, family commitment, physical appearance, sexual fidelity.

How does the ratio of positive to negative interactions relate to things like the highest ranked mate traits (from the 37 cultures study) or the trade-offs study (e.g., if forced to choose between partners who have two out of three desirable traits, which traits tend to "win" in the competition)?

Fincham's Research: 5:1 is the minimum ratio of good interactions to bad interactions. For every bad interaction, you need 5 good ones to feel good and be happy with the relationship again. (sex counts as a good interaction if it is good!) 10:1 is even better Ranked Mate Traits: The main conclusion from mate preferences: The top 4 things people look for all have to do with being a nice person. This quality initially attracts us to people: when relationship satisfaction decreases, it is often because people stop being nice to their partner. Traits with good interactions, positive feelings, being nice, will win over other traits.

What is the inherent dilemma of pair bonds?

Dynamics of attachment and exploration: if the person feels secure, they want to explore because they know they can come back to their attachment figure for comfort. In pair bonds, people are seeking security and stimulation in the same person. But, this person is likely to become less exciting over time. 3 studies on ways in which satisfaction can be sustained over time --- See below

Based on the results of facialmetric analyses, which facial features are positively correlated, negatively correlated, or uncorrelated to attractiveness ratings of male and female faces? These features can be grouped into three categories, each of which serves as a cue for an important social-behavioral system. You should know the three categories and how they correspond to the three systems.

Eye - Height and width positively associated with attraction in both male and females (bigger = better) Forehead - not as influential as eye size but positive for both as bigger Cheek bones - as important as eye size Lower lip - thickness positively associated with female attractiveness (unrelated to males) Chin - length and width you see opposite for male and female and these are big effects Eyebrow - thickness and height for female low thickness and high height for men just high thickness Pupils - height and width for men and women bigger is better and this is as important as eye size Smile Area - height and width for female bigger is better for men height is not as important but still bigger is better The 3 cues are caregiving/parenting, sexual mating, and attachment. Big eyes and big forehead relate to baby features. This cues to caregiving/parenting. Cheek bones, lower lip, chin, and eyebrow thickness are related to sexual maturation which cues sexual mating. Eyebrow height, pupils, and smile area are expressive. This cues attachment.

What are the characteristics of conflict resolution that Gottman found to predict divorce with over 90% accuracy?

Four Horsemen 1. Global criticism: instead of being critical of something a partner has said or done, one impugns the partner's character 2. Defensiveness: instead of addressing a partner's criticism, one responds with a return criticism 3. Contempt: instead of treating the partner as a respected equal, one looks down on the partner with disdain and disgust 4. Stonewalling: instead of continuing to work to resolve the conflict, one withdraws and emotionally shuts down (in 85% of heterosexual couples, the man withdraws first), withdrawal leads to even more frustration for other partner

When it comes to factors like whether one is legally married (or not), whether one has a romantic partner (or not), whether the relationship is satisfying (or not), whether one has social support (or not)... what is the "bottom line?" That is, what does it take to prevent loneliness?

Hammond Report: Conclusion: Unless your relationship or marriage makes you miserable, it is better to be married than not and you will experience many health benefits because of this. - Quality of marriage is not that important -Having a long term partner has similar benefits to marriage -Social support also has beneficial effects on health Bottom line: If you have one person in adulthood, typically a romantic partner/mate, who you feel you can count on and will have your back, then you will get health benefits from this relationship. ***PREVENT LONELINESS COMPONENT?***

Jealousy is a primary motivator for spousal homicide, especially uxoricide. What are the findings concerning restrictions on victims' freedom, victims' age, victims' relationship to perpetrator, and the timing of uxoricide relative to victims ending their relationships?

Homicide between people who co-reside is most likely to affect the spouse, rather than the child, parent, or other relative. Killing one's wife (uxoricide) is much more likely when they are newly separated then when they co-reside. As a function of age, women are more likely to get killed in their reproductive years.

What is it about the so-called "four horsemen" that makes them so destructive to relationships?

How these four horsemen are predictive of divorce: 1. Global criticism - This is the opposite of what you do when you are trying to establish a relationship (idealization) 2. Defensiveness - Intimacy involves making oneself vulnerable and letting down defenses - If you feel the need to protect yourself, something is wrong 3. Contempt - This is rejection to the ultimate extent and is not conducive to closeness 4. Stonewalling - Antithesis of commitment is withdrawal and stonewalling These four factors are predictive of divorce because they run counter to the things that help cement a close interpersonal bond

Theoretical models of mate choice differ primarily in terms of the variables that predict who individuals will find most appealing. Each (Sexual Strategies Theory, "likes attract" hypothesis, the "adventitious" model) emphasizes different characteristics of individuals that best predict who they will be attracted to. You should know what these variables are and what evidence supports and or challenges each model.

I made individual questions for each theoretical model since it was too long! -Sam

Gouin et al.: Be familiar with the methods and the results.

In humans, endogenous oxytocin and vasopressin levels covary with perceptions of relationship quality, marital behaviors, and physiological stress responses. To investigate relationships among marital behavior, oxytocin, vasopressin, and wound healing, and to determine the characteristics of individuals with the highest neuropeptide levels, 37 couples were admitted for a 24-h visit in a hospital research unit. After small blister wounds were created on their forearm, couples participated in a structured social support interaction task. Blister sites were monitored daily following discharge to assess wound repair speed. Blood samples were collected for oxytocin, vasopressin, and cytokine analyses. Higher oxytocin levels were associated with more positive communication behaviors during the structured interaction task. Furthermore, individuals in the upper oxytocin quartile healed blister wounds faster than participants in lower oxytocin quartiles. Higher vasopressin levels were related to fewer negative communication behaviors and greater tumor necrosis factor-a production. Moreover, women in the upper vasopressin quartile healed the experimental wounds faster than the remainder of the sample. These data confirm and extend prior evidence implicating oxytocin and vasopressin in couples' positive and negative communication behaviors, and also provide further evidence of their role in an important health outcome, wound healing.

In theory, why does love take these three basic forms? (Hints: neuroanatomy, neurochemistry, our continuance as a species)

In theory, why does love take these three basic forms? (Hints: neuroanatomy, neurochemistry, our continuance as a species) • To continue as a species, humans needed to survive to reproductive age, mate, and then provide sufficient care to offspring so that they too survive to reproductive age • Part of human nature is the capacity to have the specific types of strong feelings toward others that help ensure we successfully negotiate each of these adaptive challenges o Each of which is different but all of which we call "love"

Hawkley & Cacioppo: Know the findings on loneliness and health, mortality, cognition

Loneliness matters for physical health and mortality - Loneliness predicts increased morbidity and mortality - The greater the number of measurement occasions at which participants were lonely, the greater their number of cardiovascular health risks - Loneliness also was associated with increased systolic blood pressure - Depressive symptoms have been associated with loneliness - Loneliness increased risk for morbidity and mortality Loneliness matters for mental health and cognitive functioning - Loneliness has been associated with personality disorders and psychoses, suicide, impaired cognitive performance and cognitive decline over time, increased risk of Alzheimer's disease, diminished executive control, and increases in depressive symptoms - Loneliness also increases perceived stress, fear of negative evaluation, anxiety, and anger, and diminishes optimism and self-esteem - Particularly devastating consequence of feeling socially isolated is cognitive decline and dementia

One of Gottman's former students, Markman, developed an intervention program based on the four horsemen. What study method was used to test the program and what were the results?

Method - You can teach people how to avoid conflict - Engaged couples were randomly assigned to training in how to avoid the four horsemen or how to deal with finances (control group) Results - After five years follow up, couples who were taught effective conflict reduction had 50% reduced divorce rate

Relationship scientists have documented three effective ways of preventing the normative decline in relationship satisfaction. Be familiar with the methods and findings of each.

Normative decline is the idea that once people are married and relationships are established, how happy people are in that relationship declines over time if nothing is done Finkel et al. (2013) discovered no-cost intervention - How couples argue is predictive of later outcomes - They focus on how to keep people happy in relationships - They studied 120 reasonably well-functioning couples in the Chicago area for 2 years - For the 1st year, the couples wrote an account of their most serious conflict once every 4 months - For the 2nd year, half of the couples continued the same as the 1st year, but the other group also wrote about the conflicts as if they were an objective observer - Results showed that those who reflected on their conflicts just 2 times a year did not show a normative decline in relationship satisfaction Murray et al. (2011) have suggested that prolonging idealization can be beneficial for couples - By displaying a positive bias toward and/or adjusting ideals about one's partner can prolong idealization - Interpreting acts of partners in a positive way improves satisfaction - Couples who give each other the benefit of the doubt have better relationships - It is important to adjust ideals to match the actual characteristics and appreciate the traits of the other person to maintain a happy relationship - For example, if you fall in love with someone who is a great cook, it may not have been important to you before you met them, but now you should value that trait to better your relationship - Being critical (or not) is a controllable behavior - In this study, they found that couples who idealized each other prior to marriage and continued this idealization did not show the typical decline in relationship Aron et. Al, 2000: Pursuing physiologically arousing activities together -Married couples reported activities they did together in the past week. -Couples that engaged in activities that made their heart pump had higher relationship satisfaction and saw less decline over time -Control Group: Couples spent an additional 4 hours per week together -Experimental Group: Couples were assigned to do physical activities together -Couples engaging in physical activity together were more satisfied *Conclusion: if your heart is pumping when you around someone, it makes them more appealing, even in long-term relationships

Williams & Nida: manipulating ostracism, plus the effects of short-term and long-term ostracism

Ostracism means being ignored and excluded by one or more others. Despite the absence of verbal derogation and physical assault, ostracism is painful: It threatens psychological needs (belonging, self-esteem, control, and meaningful existence); and it unleashes a variety of physiological, affective, cognitive, and behavioral responses. Manipulating Ostracism: There is a procedure with three people who sit in a room awaiting the start of an experiment; only one of these is an actual research participant. As they wait, one of the two confederates picks up a small ball that happens to be on a shelf in the room and tosses it to one of the others. As the seemingly impromptu ball-tossing game continues, the two confederates follow a script that leads to the inclusion or exclusion of the actual participant. Effects of Ostracism: They have consistently found that enduring approximately 2 to 3 minutes of ostracism in this context will produce strongly negative feelings especially those of sadness and anger. Ostracism over a long period of time is a form of social death. In the short term, however, there are several ways in which a person might counter such a threat: by attempting to resecure his or her place in the group, trying to regain control that has been lost, or striking back by lashing out in some way. The social pain created by ostracism and the change in affect can both alert individuals to focus on the ostracism episode and to reflect on its meaning. During this reflective stage, the most threatened needs direct the coping goals. Furthermore, situational and characterological factors unique to that individual can affect how that person responds. Long-term exposure to ostracism, however, can deplete the individual's resources that are necessary to fortify the threatened needs and can lead to alienation, helplessness, and depression. Even recollections of short-term ostracism can retrigger the original pain associated with the event.

Infidelity: What is the most common cause of relationship infidelity, and what factors make it more likely to occur? How do social norms, investment, and evolutionary perspectives factor in?

People are more likely to cheat if others in their social network do. There are huge cultural differences in acceptance of infidelity. (In France, it is more acceptable. In Jordan, it is very unacceptable for a woman to cheat.) From the evolutionary perspective, men should be more likely to cheat overall. But when women do, they are more likely to cheat during the follicular phase of their cycle. Women are also more likely to cheat if their partner has a similar MHC to them. Women tend to cheat up (in status or gene/sperm quality.) From the investment perspective, whether people choose to be unfaithful depends on how much they have invested in the relationship and how much they stand to lose. The more you have invested the more you will have to lose, which dampens the likelihood of cheating. 3 Types of Infidelity: 1) Arrangement Infidelity - The affair complements the primary relationship - both members agrees that extra-pair sex is allowed. There is never the idea that the new sexual relationship will jeopardize the primary relationship. Men are more likely to initiate this sort of arrangement. This kind of infidelity varies as a function of sex and sexual orientation. 2) Romantic Infidelity - Cause by dissatisfaction with life, not the relationship. Contract to popular belief, research does not support the idea that people cheat because they are unhappy in the relationship. It is more common that the person is feeling dissatisfied with some aspects of their life. Romantic infatuation is appealing because it makes you feel good to be in love with someone and the novelty causes great spikes in dopamine. This kind has nothing to do with the state of the current relationship. Men are more likely than women to engage in this type of infidelity. 3) Situational Infidelity - the most common. We assume that people cheat because there is something wrong with the relationship (but that is not so.) These are people who are not unhappy with the relationship and are not looking for a new partner. Simply the opportunity presents itself. It is triggered by situational factors. Men are more likely than women.

Garver-Apgar et al.: Be familiar with the method and results.

Preferences for mates that possess genes dissimilar to one's own at the major histocompatibility complex (MHC) have been found in mice, birds, fish, and humans. These preferences may help individuals choose genetically compatible mates and may adaptively function to prevent inbreeding or to increase heterozy- gosity and thereby immunocompetence of offspring. As the proportion of MHC alleles couples shared increased, women's sexual responsivity to their partners decreased, their number of extra pair sexual partners increased, and their attraction to men other than their primary partners increased, particularly during the fertile phase of their cycles.

Research has shown that romantic attachment figures (whether they are physically present or only mentally conjured) can help individuals cope with physical or psychological discomfort. What are the methods and findings of these types of studies that were presented in class?

Prior to public speaking, contact with a partner (hand-holding, hugging) is shown to lower blood pressure, which leads to lower reactivity to stressful events. Another example: spouse handholding, stranger handholding, and no handholding. Handholding attenuated neural response to a threat - this observation is stronger in the case of partner than stranger (but either is better than none.) Higher marital quality predicted less response to threat. Another example: Participants were shown either a partner's picture, a stranger's picture, or a random object (like a chair.) They were given a thermal stimulation while looking at each of these and then were asked to rate the pain following each. The least pain was felt when looking at their partner while receiving pain stimuli. Another example: Participants were asked to recall an upsetting memory and then look at their partner's picture. This helps them recover faster. Finding: Greater recovery was associated with lower likelihood of health problems up to 6 months after the study.

According to the process model of mate selection presented in lecture, how do the multitude of factors (including propinquity, similarity, familiarity, appearance, personality, status, situational effects, and reciprocal liking) help narrow the large pool of potential mates down to one?

Propinquity - narrows down by who is around and who you interact with Similarity - likes-attract hypothesis predicts that people choose similar mates Familiarity - we feel more comfortable Appearance - more attractive, usually aspects they want in a mate Personality - we like people who are warm and friendly Status - Mr. Powers can fly Situation Effect - question #1 the setting Reciprocal liking - we don't want to be rejected This is a the triangle example. We have a pool and narrow down based on these factors. We start with who's around (propinquity, similarity, familiarity.) This is the pool of eligibles. Then who is appealing (personality, status, appearance, plus situational effects.) Then who's interested (reciprocal liking.) Then who's the one which leads to infatuation.

Hofer: Know the findings reported in Tables 1 and 2.

Responses to bereavement. There there are two forms of disturbance: the acute, recurrent waves of distress, which last only minutes, and the chronic, more slowly developing background disturbance, which is measured in weeks and months. Table 1 summarizes the symptoms characterizing these two forms of response, with the behavioral and psychologic symptoms listed on the left and the physiologic symptoms on the right. I would particularly call your attention to the cognitive and perceptual disturbance caused by be- reavement, with its impairments of con- centration, memory, judgment, and deci- siveness, including illusions and even hallucinations of the lost person in 12-40% of cases (7). This disorganization of ego functioning contributes to a sense of im- pending loss of control. We know very lit- tle about the physiologic changes. The sleep disturbance has not been characterized in any detail and the evidence for cardiovas- cular changes is based on epidemiologic data (8). It is generally assumed that the acute and chronic symptoms are both parts of the same process, but it is possible that we are wrong in taking this for granted. In this paper I will focus on the chronic background disturbance during which most of the severe biologic changes occur. Agitation. Crying Aimless activity-inactivity, Preoccupation with image of deceased Table 2 is a summary of infant responses to separation from the mother. Agitation, Vocalization, Searching, inactivity, Decreased social interaction, play, Mouthing, rocking, Increased heart rate, Increased cortisol, Increased catecholamines.

What are the two "universals" in terms of attractiveness ratings of male bodies? What information might they convey? And on these two dimensions, what is judged to be most attractive?

SHR: shoulder-to-hip ratio: i. most attractive: 1.4 ratio. shows higher testosterone levels - causes growth in upper body ii. this is the norm for post-pubescent men WHR: waist to hip ratio i. low WHR decreases attractiveness ratings ii. WHR of 1 is the norm/average and most attractive for post-pubescent, not old males iii. the higher the levels of testosterone, the greater the suppression of growth in the hip area convey important info about a person's reproductive capability and health just like WHR in women

What are the indicators of a species' mating pattern (from monogamous to promiscuous) and based on the evidence how would humans be categorized on each of the indicators?

See chart in take note. 1) Os Penis: The majority of males species have a penile bone. This is an indicator of a promiscuous mating pattern. Human males do not. In humans, males need to be aroused to get an erection in order to have sex. This requires that there is some interaction between male and female, oxytocin is released, which is bond promoting. 2) Proportional Size of Testes: Promiscuous species tend to have larger testes relative to their body size. Sperm Competition - you can't be sure that you're the first male to have mated with that female so you need more sperm to compete. Human males produce significantly more sperm if they are separated from their partner. Human testes are medium sized. 3) Covert vs. Overt Ovulation: Human females have been categorized as cover ovualtors because it is not blatantly obvious. If you know when a female is ovulating, you can know when to have sex to reproduce. But recall the differences during ovulating in olfactory cues, vocal cues, behaviors, attractions, attractiveness, clothing color, etc. This is ambiguous. 4) Sex for fun: Humans are the animals with the weirdest sex life. Humans have sex when pregnancy is unlikely. We have sex in private. In humans, sex promotes pair bonding. 5) Sexual Behavior: A significant number of humans have sex outside the relationship (15%.) This is ambiguous. 6) Sexual Dimorphism: Greater dimorphism indicates more promiscuous pattern. We can tell male and female humans apart because they differ in overall body shape and size. 7) Paternal Care of Offspring: indicates monogamous species. 8) Seperation Distress: in pairs indicates monogamous species. 9) Conclusions: Humans are a socially monogamous species. In which sexual monogamy varies as a function of many factors (gender, age, sexual orientation, culture, norm, values.)

Sexual Strategies Theory

Sexual Strategies Theory o Sexual strategies theory suggests that men and women differ in what they seek in a mate • Women want fewer partners and value status and resources in a mate • Men want many partners and look for physical attractiveness in a mate • There is evidence to support this theory • According to survey data on international mate preferences, heterosexual females rank earning potential more important than males o Not true for lesbians • Males (homo and hetero) rank physical attractiveness higher than females • When asked how many sex partners are wanted in the next 30 years, mean response for females is 2 and mean response for males is 64 o Median response for both is 1 • Many studies show that males (homo and hetero) are more willing to have casual sex than women • According to Buss (1994), "species-typical pairing" occurs when young, attractive, and fertile females pair with older, powerful, and wealthy males o It is more common to find couples that are similar in physical attractiveness and social resources • Predicts that males will value physical appearance in a mate while attractive females will value wealth and status in a mate Buss and Schmitt 1993: What sex are you? Most important: find a mate of the opposite sex. If there are sex differences in parental investment, then there are sex differences in mating strategies. Optimal male strategy: many partners, fertility criterion. Optimal female strategy: few partners, resource criterion. Clark and Hatfield 1989: attractive research confederate approaches men and women and asks date/apartment/bed. No women say yes to bed, very few say yes to apartment. Men frequently say yes to both. Problem: hunter-gatherer society, conception is only likely on 80 days out of 26 year time frame of fertility. Probability of conception is 1/100 due to pregnancy and lactation and cycle. Problem: stable partnership effects, short term mating for men isn't the best option, infants that are reared in stable social environments are more likely to attract and retain mates, women ovulate more regularly and for more years. Problem: in countries where the economic status of women is higher, they care less about resources in potential mates, has to do with social circumstances. Lesbians do not show the same pattern of giving higher priority to economic status of mate. Problem: although people say they want ____, results of speed dating studies show that self reported preferences do not predict attractions, and there are no sex differences in value of looks vs. Status.

Diamond: Be familiar with the arguments and theories regarding differences between romantic love and sexual desire, their evolutionary origins, and their implications for gender and sexual orientation.

Sexual desire typically denotes a need or drive to seek out sexual objects or to engage in sexual activities, whereas romantic love typically denotes the powerful feelings of emotional infatuation and attachment between intimate partners. Research suggests that the marked experiential differences between love and desire may be partially attributable to their distinct neurochemical signatures. Neurochemicals regulate a range of emotional, cognitive, behavioral, and biological processes that facilitate social bonding by fostering conditioned as- sociations between specific social partners and intrinsic feelings of reward. Most individuals end up falling in love with partners to whom they are sexually drawn, and this seems to make good evolutionary sense given that pair bonding with one's sexual partner is a good way to ensure that the resulting offspring have two dedicated parents instead of just one. Some researchers have argued that they originally evolved for an altogether different purpose: infant-caregiver attachment. Adult pair bonding may be an ex-aptation—a system that originally evolved for one reason, but comes to serve another. Not only can humans experience these feelings separately, but an individual's sexual predisposition for the same sex, the other sex, or both sexes may not circumscribe his or her capacity to fall in love with partners of either gender. Rather, it seems that individuals are capable of developing intense, enduring, preoccupying affections for one another regardless of either partner's sexual attractiveness or arousal. Also, the role of oxytocin in both love and desire may contribute to the widely observed phenomenon that women report experiencing greater interconnections between love and desire than do men.

How do the three basic adult attachment styles differ at the levels of affect, behavior, and cognition (the ABCs)?

The 3 basic adult attachment styles: -avoidant, ambivalent, secure (same as infancy) Cognition: can I expect other to..? I can count on other people. - Secure: yes. Insecure: NO Affect: how does this make me feel? Partner's availability... - if you believe that your partner will always be there for you, you will feel content and secure - if you are insecurely attached, you will feel fear, anxiety, and rejection (a combination of negative emotions) Behavior: what should I do then? - Secure: if you need someone, you will turn to them for help and comfort -Ambivalent: they will become very clingy and will display greater signals of distress. they will also express anger and demands. -Avoidant: they will distance themselves during times of stress because they don't think anyone will be there for them.

Be familiar with the symptoms of romantic infatuation, its average duration and time course, its underlying neurochemistry, and its theorized function.

The experience of becoming romantically infatuated with someone was a common one. There are common features to experience across numerous people's descriptions. Symptoms: Acute Onset - people remember the exact moment when they became infatuated with this person. Physiological Arousal - the person makes your heart pound Mental Preoccupation - not being bale to get the person out of your head Mood Dependency - the way you feel at any given time depends largely on whether the person is signaling that they might be interested in you Idealization - the person seems perfect in every way; you can find nothing wrong with them Single Target - you are only focused on one person Romantic infatuation reaches its peak intensity immediately. By the end of the first year, the intensity of this infatuation has been reduced by 50%. It reaches the lowest point at 2 years into the relationship +/- 6 months. This is the window of time where infatuation is reaching a stable point. If couples remains together, it levels off and has natural fluctuations. Neurochemistry: Dopamine - predominate during infatuation. It is released before and during sex. This is a appetitive/approach system. It is using cocaine receptors. Opiates - these take over once infatuation fades. It is released during and after sex. This is the consummatory reward system. It is using the heroin receptors. The function is to promote bonding between partners and help create and emotion connect. NOT SURE ABOUT FUNCTION^^^^^^^^

What are the dynamics of the attachment behavioral system? In other words, how does the system work? What turns it on and off?

The feeling of anxiety turns the attachment system on and the feeling of safety and security turns the attachment system off. This is often explained through a flow chart. First ask: is my attachment figure sufficiently near? If the answer is yes then the child is secure and content. The child will proceed to explore, play, and socialize. If the answer is no then the child will be anxious and fearful. The child will proceed to signal distress and seek contact. This system depends on endogenous and exogenous factors.

According to the relevant research, what is the essence of intimacy? What factors both foster and reveal interpersonal intimacy?

Vulnerability - letting down defenses, allowing someone to get dangerously close Factors: Verbal self-disclosure - reciprocal, gradual, increasingly "risky" - "violations" (e.g., TMI) interrupt the process - acceptance / validation are essential - bi-directional (promotes and reveals intimacy) Kinesics (body language) - defended or undefended posture - flirtatious behaviors ("universal" sequence) - readily observable - again, bidirectional (promote and reveal) Proxemics - gender differences - eye contact - physical touch (where, how, how long?) - flirting - again, bi-directional Paralinguistics (manner of speaking) - pitch, intonation contours, whispers - tone vs. content (e.g., Harma, 2014) - again, bi-directional Settings - private vs. public - alone vs. group - possibility of interruption - specified or unspecified ending - eating & sleeping - dim lighting All of the factors promote and reveal intimacy!

What is the one "universal" in terms of attractiveness ratings of female bodies? What information does it convey and what are its correlates? And on this one dimension, what is judged to be most attractive?

Waist-to-Hip Ratio (WHR i. lower WHR is associated with higher attractivess of human bodies ii. overal highest rating schematic has a WHR of 0.7 - ideal body shape for women• WHR conveys health status and fertility. When you increase WHR the higher the incidents of diabetes, cancers, cardiovascular disease, and overall mortality. For fertility, bodily changes at puberty, menopause, and pregnancy. Bodily shape and likelihood of conception. Every .1 up makes you less likely to get pregnant. Most attractive WHR is the average for women who are post-pubescent, pre-menopausal, and have never had a child.

What are the approximate ages and phases and related behaviors in the ontogeny of attachment bonds?

What are the approximate ages and phases and related behaviors in the ontogeny of attachment bonds? When we are born we do not have any attachment. We get attached after birth. Who we get attached to depends on who is available. Ontogeny is the development. The formation of attachment unfolds in the same time frame in all infants. This is hard wired. 0-2 months - pre-attachment babies don't care who take cares of them as long as basic needs are met. 2-6 months - attachment in the making They start showing clear preferences. They smile at specific people. They raise their arms in the direction of certain people. Babies start nuzzling in this time, and they don't do that with everything. 6-8 months - clear cut attachment This is the first time you fall in love. This is when babies zero in on at least one person. When you become attached to someone, the experience you have is falling love with someone. There are 3 other important things that happen to all human infants. 1) They get upset by being separated (Separation Distress.) This almost always comes as a big shock to parents. 2) The baby will scream when a stranger smiles at a baby (Stranger Anxiety.) 3) Self-produced Locomotion 24 months - goal-oriented partnership They know when that person is not there they still exist. The relationship between caregiver and child changes.

"Adventitious" Model• Adventitious model suggests that propinquity plays an essential role in mate selection

What are your options? Lykken and Tellegen 1993. Ideal preferences vs actual mate choice. Twin study with spouses. Two people who are virtually identical do not have similar spouses. Identical twins are no more likely than random people to find the other's spouse attractive. Spouses of identical twins were no more likely than chance to find the co twin attractive. Conclusions: human mating is relatively adventitious. The adventitious factor is PROPINQUITY. The people you happen to encounter in your everyday environment--not a consequence of lists you make or things you are actively looking for.

What is the "emotion regulation" function of attachment at the level of behavior? At the level of neurotransmitters?

What is the "emotion regulation" function of attachment at the level of behavior? At the level of neurotransmitters? Starting in early life, whether you feel calm or anxious depends on another person. So your emotions are being regulated by another person. Some other person's presence or absence is determining how you feel. This happens across the life span. (see diagram from Feb. 5) At the level of neurotransmitter, opiods tend to be triggered by distress. They will be released following an initial trauma. Opioids have a morphine-like effect. Opiods and oxytocin both result in a pleasant experience. Oxytocin = positive reinforcement - it enhances the feeling of reward Opioids = negative reinforcement - alleviates feeling of distress. The built in system for regulating stress are ANS and HPA. Oxytocin and Opiods down regulate ANS and HPA and bring you down to level of homeostasis. The neurotransmitters dampen the response and bring you back to state of equilibrium. They are calming reactions. Contact with an attachment figure triggers a release of oxytocin and opiod. This reduces regulates stress level. Is unique to the attachment figure.

Intimacy and commitment are two major factors in determining whether a couple will remain together beyond the infatuation phase. How do insecure attachment styles (i.e., ambivalent and avoidant) affect intimacy and commitment?

When dopamine reward declines some people lose interest. At this point where dopamine reward is declining if they aren't attached the relationship probably won't last. Their commitment will decline and eventually disappear. Attachment styles affect both intimacy and commitment. Ambivalent people disclose too much too early. They also want commitment too early, and they seek closeness earlier than people are comfortable (too intimate.) Avoidant people tend to keep their distance, not seeking intimacy. They are highly resistant to commitment. Early attachment experiences have lasting effects because you emerge feeling that you are or are not loved.

What is assortative mating? What are examples of ways in which mates are similar? What is the difference between mate similarity due to active phenotypic assortment and mate similarity due to social homogamy?

· Assortative mating is the idea that people who are similar to each other will be attracted to each other. · Mates are similar: body size, body type, facial resemblance, etc. (from an old test, so maybe change the example) For example, mates tend to be similar on level of education. This could be because they consciously look for a partner who is equally educated (active phenotypic assortment) OR because they affiliate primarily with people who are equally educated (social homogamy).

What are some empirical study examples of propinquity effects on interpersonal attraction? On what evidential basis can it be concluded that propinquity effects are powerful, enduring, intuitive, and not explicit?

· Propinquity is "nearness in physical space" as a predictor for relationships · In Festinger, et al., 1950, WWII servicemen and their families were randomly assigned to apartments. The closer they lived (same quad, building, floor, next door vs. farther away), the more likely they were to be friends · In Segal, 1974, Students in the training academy of the Maryland State Police were assigned to dorm rooms and classroom seats alphabetically according to last name. The best predictor for the three best friends on the force was propinquity. · In the Back et al. study even though people were randomly assigned to seats, the closer they sat the more likely they were to be friends one year later! Intuitive understanding but not an explicit preference