Module 5: Interpersonal Strategies and Skills
Which of the following examples of praise is the most effective? "You've really been on top of your work lately." "Thank you for the support you've given me." "Thank you for being so accommodating with my schedule last week when my toddler was ill." "Nice job handling that difficult customer."
"Thank you for being so accommodating with my schedule last week when my toddler was ill."
preparing to negotiate
-clarify your interests and needs -consider the best time to raise the issue -consider cultural differences -prepare your statement
Conducting the negotiation
1) Identify the ends both parties are seeking 2) Brainstorm a list of possible solutions 3) Evaluate the alternative solutions 4) Implement and follow up on the solution
Workplace bullying forms
Aggression: controlling through fear and intimidation Criticism: nit-picking that destroys the target's confidence and competence by making unreasonable demands for work Deviousness: exhibiting passive aggressive, dishonest, and indirect behavior Gatekeeping: controlling the resources needed to succeed, including money, staffing, and time
Agree with the criticism (responding to criticism)
Agree with the facts Agree with the critic's right to his or her own perception Emphasize areas of common ground: Point out areas where you and the other person share the same point of view
lose-lose outcome
An approach to negotiation in which one party's perceived loss leads to an outcome with negative consequences for the other parties Feuding parties may ruin their own careers by gaining reputation as difficult employees or poor team players Sometimes it's better to compromise than to fight battles competitively and risk a lose lose outcome
Negotiation strategies and outcomes: win-lose approach
An approach to negotiation that assumes any gain by one party is possible only at the expense of the other party Use to protect your interests if others insist on gaining at your expense or when resources are truly scarce
Emotional intelligence (eq) and social intelligence
Aptitude and skills needed for interacting well with others. refers to interpersonal communication skills rather than cognitive or intellectual abilities.
Seek more information (responding to criticism)
Ask for examples or clarification Guess about details of the criticism Paraphrase the critic Ask what the critic wants
Work for cooperative solution (responding to criticism)
Ask for the chance to state your point of view Focus on a solution, not on finding fault
Communication traits of unpleasant coworkers
Busybody (nosey) Controlling/Bossy Self-promoting (self-centered) Unprofessional behavior (rude) Unprofessional focus of attention (personal problems at work) Defensive and judgmental (attacks others) Distracting (behaves in irritating ways)
sexual harassment
Civil rights act of 1964 and subsequent legislation and court decisions have identified two types of sexual harassment
Effective feedback criticism delivery
Deliver feedback privately Allow enough time Avoid sounding and looking judgmental Listen to the other person Remain calm and professional
Quid pro quo (this for that)
Directly or indirectly threatening not to promote someone who won't date you or implying employment depends on granting sexual favors
The process (conflict)
Dispute about how to do something than what to do Example: A project team might all agree the work at hand needs to be divided up but they could disagree on how to decide who does what
Relational Issues (Conflict)
Disputes that center on how parties want to be treated by one another. can involve control, affinity, and respect
Ego/Identity Issues (Conflict)
Face: The identity each of us strives to present Competence, commitment, fairness, honesty, reasonableness, professionalism
Workplace bullying and incivility are essentially the same thing. True False
False Incivility can be mild and unintentional, but workplace bullying is more malicious, damaging, and ongoing.
Sexual harassment can occur only between one man and one woman. True False
False Sexual harassment can occur in a variety of circumstances and can arise between members of the same sex or between men and women. References
Only communication that is intentionally insensitive or rude can be considered uncivil communication. True False
False Incivility does not have to be intentional to have an impact.
Identifying a hostile work environment is a matter of following federal guidelines. True False
False Though the Civil Rights Act of 1964 identified hostile work environment as one type of sexual harassment, determining exactly what kinds of behavior create a hostile working environment is more difficult. A comment that is harmless to one person may be very offensive to someone else.
Descriptive statement
I language.
The costs of incivility
If 1 out of 100 employees experience a single act of incivility an entire year, the cost of lost productivity in employee turnover amounted to nearly 8 million dollars per year and other ancillary costs
Several considerations for criticism
Limit the criticism to one topic Make sure the criticism is accurate Define the problem clearly Show how your criticism can benefit The recipient Remember to acknowledge the positives
Negotiating with the offender would be a good strategy for dealing with incivility and bullying in which of the following situations? Susan's offender is her direct supervisor. The person bullying Harold is the human resources manager. Sam can't afford to lose his job or get demoted. Mary has a job offer at a different company, but she would prefer to stay in her current job.
Mary has a job offer at a different company, but she would prefer to stay in her current job.
Negotiating with the offender would be a good strategy for dealing with incivility and bullying in which of the following situations? Susan's offender is her direct supervisor. The person bullying Harold is the human resources manager. Sam can't afford to lose his job or get demoted. Mary has a job offer at a different company, but she would prefer to stay in her current job.
Mary has a job offer at a different company, but she would prefer to stay in her current job. Negotiating with the offender is a risky approach under any circumstance, and a risk-benefit analysis should be conducted prior to taking this step. Mary is in the best position to negotiate with her bully because she has another option lined up in case the negotiation does not go well.
Strategies for dealing with incivility and bullying (Christines)
Negotiate with offender: risky approach. Meet one-on-one or have a mediator. Neutral meeting place. appeal to a third-party: someone who can command the offender's attention and respect or higher in the chain of command if the offender is your boss. Also risky bc the Authority to whom you appeal to might support offender Back off: strategy for protecting yourself Re-frame your thinking: don't start believing the demeaning abuse
Offering and Responding to Criticism
Offering constructive feedback— It is descriptive and not evaluated If focuses on behavior and not personal characteristics It is specific and not general It's timed appropriately and not delayed or left to chance It is offered and not impose
Sandra knows she should give her fellow team members some praise, but she is having a difficult time coming up with specific examples. Which of the following would be the best option for her? Praise progress. Wait until they do something worth praising. Ask her boss to praise them. Make something up and praise promptly.
Praise progress.
Kate has a number of complaints about her job. She feels her ideas are not taken seriously, she feels overqualified for the job, and she thinks her team members exclude her. Which of the following tips for giving praise should Mark have followed to minimize Kate's dissatisfaction? Check all that apply. Praise promptly. Praise progress. Relay praise. Do not give broad praise.
Praise promptly. Praise progress. Relay praise.
Giving praise to get the desired results
Praise promptly: The quicker, the more meaningful Make praise specific: describe exactly what you appreciate Praise progress, not just perfection: deliver genuine compliments by looking for progress Praise intermittently: praise others from time to time but don't go overboard Relay praise praise sincerely: insincere praise is worse than no praise at all Collectivist cultures: don't single out, give private reinforcement
You need to bring up a difficult issue with one of your employees who has a tendency to become very defensive. Which of the following approaches is not advisable? Use "I" language. Provide clear, nonnegotiable instructions. Be honest. Show concern for the employee.
Provide clear, nonnegotiable instructions.
Workplace dignity arises from three kinds of communication
Respectful treatment Recognition of competence Acknowledgment of a worker's value to the organization
Susan is very stressed about her job. She has been dealing with a bully in her department, and going to work each day is growing more and more unbearable. Unfortunately, Susan and her bully have been tasked with collaborating for an upcoming presentation, and their manager is counting on them to do a good job. In addition, there are several work celebrations coming up, and Susan feels she should attend. Consider the strategy of backing off to deal with incivility and bullying and explain how Susan should back off to deal with her bully.
Responses will vary but will likely mention some of the following: - Susan should communicate with her bully via e-mail instead of in person as much as possible. - Susan should divide up the tasks of preparing the presentation so she will not have to collaborate closely with her bully. - Susan should see if she can work at different times or locations. - Susan should try to communicate with her bully through the bully's assistant, if applicable. - Susan should avoid celebrations and social events if she knows her bully will be present. - Susan should take days off if possible and if doing so will not prevent her from doing her job.
Bob feels he is being sexually harassed by his coworker Will. Bob feels uncomfortable about it but feels unable to do much about the situation because he is new to the company and Will is loved by his coworkers and their supervisor. Bob decides to write a personal letter to the harasser. What should he write, and what should he do with the letter?
Responses will vary but will likely mention the following: - Bob should keep a copy of the letter for himself. - Bob should put the letter in a sealed envelope. - Bob should include a copy of the company's sexual harassment policy. - Bob should note when he delivered or mailed the letter. In the letter, he should detail when and where the harassment took place, what the offensive behavior entailed, how it made him feel, and what behavior he would like stopped.
A landlord and tenant disagree about who should pay for an obviously necessary paint job for the office space. Consider what you have learned about negotiation and handling conflicts constructively. Identify the ends desired by each party, and then brainstorm a list of possible solutions.
Responses will vary. The end desired by the landlord may be keeping costs low, while the end desired by the tenant may be to have a freshly painted office. Possible solutions may include the following: - The landlord could offer to use some leftover paint from another job, which would then cost the landlord nothing in material costs. - The tenant could offer to purchase the paint if the landlord provides the labor. That would keep costs down for the landlord, and the tenant would be able to select the desired color. - The landlord could offer to provide the paint if the tenant handles the labor. References
A complete apology
Sincere regret Understanding that the person suffered harm An explanation of what happened Corrective action Restoration
Anne is convinced "the boys" do not respect her and are guilty of uncivil communication. Which of the following actions would have made her believe this? They have withheld sales information from her. They have spread crass rumors about her. They have secretly and anonymously posted criticism of her work online. They did not invite her to a weekend barbecue.
They have withheld sales information from her. They have spread crass rumors about her. They have secretly and anonymously posted criticism of her work online.
The topic at hand (conflict)
Topic related disagreements. Involves issues including: Pay and other compensation, resources, scheduling, job assignments, level of autonomy, The quality of product and services, budgeting
Respecting spirituality in the workplace
Treat all faiths equally Draw clear boundaries Don't be judgmental Diffuse hot button issues promptly
Raising difficult issues
Use descriptive language Focus on solving problems, not controlling others (problem oriented messages: aim at solving both peoples needs) Be honest: don't manipulate. Show concern for others Demonstrate an attitude of equality Keep an open mind
hostile work environment
Verbal or nonverbal behavior that has the intention or effect of interfering with someone's work or creating an intimidating, offensive, or hostile environment. Unwelcome remarks, humor, stares, hand or body signs, and invasions of physical space
win-win approach
When you and the other party have common interests When the other party is willing to consider a win-win approach When a continuing, harmonious relationship is important When you are weaker or power is approximately equal When long time goals are more important
Mark needs to offer constructive feedback to Kate about coming in late to the office. Coming in late is bad for team morale, sullies Kate's reputation, and also reflects poorly on Mark as a manager. Which of the following is an example of constructive feedback Mark could give? Check all that apply. You have been coming in 30 minutes late about three mornings of every week. It would be helpful if you were in the office on time in the morning. Human resources starts cutting pay if you are late too many days. I'm afraid that your tardiness is going to make your team members assume your work isn't up to par, and I would hate for them to make that mistake. You need to shape up or ship out.
You have been coming in 30 minutes late about three mornings of every week. It would be helpful if you were in the office on time in the morning. Human resources starts cutting pay if you are late too many days. I'm afraid that your tardiness is going to make your team members assume your work isn't up to par, and I would hate for them to make that mistake.
Avoidance can be a good choice for dealing with conflict, but it can also have some negative outcomes. Which of the following is not a negative outcome of avoidance? You become frustrated. You lose self-respect. The problem gets worse. You put harmony above other issues.
You put harmony above other issues.
Which of the following statements about giving praise is accurate? You should praise someone in private and keep that information confidential. You should praise only perfection and not progress. You should make your praise specific. You should give praise even if you don't really mean it
You should make your praise specific.
Negotiation is involved in which of the following approaches to conflict? collaboration competition compromise accommodation avoidance
avoidance When you address an issue directly, such as in collaboration, competition, or compromise, you will need to negotiate.
Approaches to Conflict
avoiding, accommodating, competing, collaborating, compromising
"The boys," as Anne calls them, like to joke around. Which of the following examples would be considered uncivil communication? calling one another by funny, crude nicknames making harmless jokes about spouses reading puns from the company newsletter to one another sending smiley face emoticons in e-mails to one another
calling one another by funny, crude nicknames making harmless jokes about spouses
Which of the following is not a good strategy for avoiding sexual harassment problems in the workplace? providing sexual harassment training to all employees implementing policies that will not tolerate sexual harassment distributing jokes about sexual harassment so people won't be so sensitive making sure the organizational climate is positive
distributing jokes about sexual harassment so people won't be so sensitive
Responding to Criticism (common responses)
fight: Counterattacking and blaming others flight: avoiding critics.
Which of the following best describes the type of sexual harassment Peter experienced at work? incivility quid pro quo third-party harassment hostile work environment
hostile work environment
Uncivil communication between equals or from subordinates to superiors likely would not involve which of the following? withholding information spreading rumors interrupting the other person anonymously posting criticism online
interrupting the other person
Handling conflicts constructively
negotiation
In the conflict with the flower, imagine that the head with the flower is trying to give the flower to the other head to apologize for missing the retirement party. Which type of conflict is this? ego/identity the process the topic at hand relational
relational
Which of the following is likely to be the best course of action for someone wanting to respond to sexual harassment while also protecting herself? taking care of the harassment at the lowest and most informal level reporting the incident directly to the person in the highest position in the company fighting sexual harassment through legal channels publicizing the harassment on Facebook
taking care of the harassment at the lowest and most informal level Fighting sexual harassment through legal channels can be exhausting and demoralizing and can make the victim a target of more harassment. Taking care of the harassment at the lowest and most informal level can often solve the problem in a way that does not punish the target.
incivility
the exchange of seemingly inconsequential, inconsiderate words and deeds that violate the conventional standards of workplace conduct Can't be relatively mild and unintentional Ex) checking messages during a meeting (insensitive) name calling (blatantly rude)
Megan's team is tasked with creating the presentation for the company's annual conference. They have decided how the presentation should be organized and that the work must be divided and assigned, but they cannot agree on how to determine who does what. Their conflict falls into which category? relational issues the topic at hand the process identity issues
the process
The conflict between Robin Williams and the two-headed monster is which type of conflict? the process the topic at hand ego/identity relational
the topic at hand
Organizational climate
underlying nature of relationships in work groups A relatively stable picture of an organization that is shared by its members Have a powerful effect on performance. productivity, job satisfaction, and employees' willingness to express descent
Which of the following situations calls for a competitive approach rather than a win-win approach to negotiating? when you and the other party have common interests when short-term goals are more important when a continuing, harmonious relationship is important when you are the weaker party
when short-term goals are more important
Your architecture firm is trying to win a bid to build a new sports complex. You will be up against several other prominent firms. Which negotiating strategy must your firm adopt? win-lose lose-lose win-win Western
win-lose
