Steel Magnolias: Shelby's Lines (7 are just actions)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 M'LYNN You should not be on your feet all day. You should be kinder to your circulatory system.

(Changing subject.) Annelle? I know you're new and all, but I don't let that stop you. Anytime you have anything to say, you just let 'er rip.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 CLAIREE Try living next door to him.

(Enter SHELBY. Her hair is in rollers. She carries a picture torn out of a magazine. She is a blushing bride in the first stages of completion.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 TRUVY You will always find that to be true.

(Her nails.) This is drying way too dark. "Practically Pink" my foot!Truvy? Do you have any of those nail polish remover things?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 21 TRUVY Drink the juice, honey.

(Pushing away the juice, spilling it.) No!

Act One: Scene 1 Page 22 M'LYNN Perhaps that explains why I have so much gray hair. But you've known Shelby as long as I have. You know I have to let her be strong.

(SHELBY drinks.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 There she is ! There's my girl! Come break my neck.

(SHELBY's fingernails are wet so she careful when she hugs.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 21 TRUVY Must run in the family. Shelby. You have such pretty hair... so thick...

(SHELBY's head is beginning to drop forward. She resists Truvy's touch.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 TRUVY She'll have to call you back.

(To M'Lynn.) Thank you, Mama.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 TRUVY Shelby, it's Tommy. He wants to know where your car is.

Absolutely not. That's the honeymoon getaway car. He just wants to defile it.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 TRUVY I love those kinds of talks... in the arms of the man you love.

Actually we fought most of the time.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN The bridesmaids' dresses are beautiful...

All of the walls are banked with sprays of flowers in the two shades of blush and bashful. There's a pink carpet specially laid for the service. And pink silk bunting draped over anything that would stand still.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 13 and 14 M'LYNN Is this a riddle?

Annelle. This is my mama. How're things at the house?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 TRUVY Where'd you meet him?

At a party at the Petroleum Club in Shreveport. I had no idea who he was, but I was getting a big kick out of watching him on the dance floor. It was painfully obvious he had never taken the time to dance in front of mirror. There was something so attractive about how stupid he looked.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 TRUVY What?

Because I told him I couldn't marry him. (Shock all around.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN Her colors are pink and pink.

Blush and bashful.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 TRUVY (The peacemaker) What are your colors, Shelby?

Blush and bashful.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 14 M'LYNN I'm sure I have something at the house that'll do.

But do you have pink?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 22 M'LYNN She's been so upset lately. She and Jackson have been going round and round. Dr. Michoud told her at her last appointment that children are not possible. It wasn't the easiest thing in the world to sit there and watch your child's heart break.

Don't talk about me like I'm not here.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 TRUVY Good ____

Exactly.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 25 and 26 M'LYNN Shelby, why don't you finish off that juice?

Forget the juice.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 14 If I don't have something, we'll send one of the boys to get you some delicate pink nail polish.

Great idea, Mama. I'd love to see what Tommy'd pick out.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 22 and 23 M'LYNN I know. She feels that Jackson might be throwing away his chance for children. They've discussed it and he seems to have taken it alright... Shelby's the one that's pushing the issue. He's crazy about her and...

He said, "Shut up... Don't b stupid. There's plenty of kids out there that need good homes. We'll adopt ten of 'em. We'll buy them if we have to."

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 TRUVY Sure. (Clairee gets the recipe box. Truvy works on Shelby's hair.) Your mother doesn't tell us much, Shelby. What's Jackson like?

He's pretty swell. I thought he was a pest at first, but then he kind of grew on me. And now I love him.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 13 TRUVY Did you bring me the picture of that hairdo like I asked?

Here you go. Study it carefully. (Pulls out a plastic bag.) Here's the baby's breath.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 SHELBY Right behind me, I thought. (Annelle enters with fresh coffee.)

Hi! I'm Shelby Eatenton... soon to be Latcherie.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 13 TRUVY Perfect. (M'Lynn enters carrying a large tote bag.)

Hi, Mama. Look at Miss Clairee's shoes.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 CLAIREE Try living next door to him. (Enter SHELBY. Her hair is in rollers. She carries a picture torn out of a magazine. She is a blushing bride in the first stages of completion.)

Hi, everybody!

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 M'LYNN They served steak and baked potatoes. They went to a lot of trouble.

His family loves to barbecue.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 26 TRUVY I hate it when people bring weapons into my shop.

How did you get Daddy's gun away from him?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 CLAIREE You are so lucky, Shelby. Louisiana lawyers do well whether they want to or not.

I don't really care. Don't get me wrong. The money's real nice... but I just like the idea of growing old with somebody. My dream is to get old and sit on the back porch covered with grandchildren and say, "No!" and "Stop that!"

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 TRUVY What a pretty color.

I hope this doesn't dry to dark. If it's too dark, it will never do. You know how the colors are never the same on the bottle.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 CLAIREE Jackson sounds like good people to me.

I knew right then and there that if he was dumb enough to spend the rest of his life with me, then I'm dumb enough to marry him. (SHELBY is recovering. She realizes what has happened and is embarrassed.) Oh gosh... oh gosh... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, Mama. (M'Lynn hugs SHELBY. The phone rings.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN That sanctuary looks like it's been hosed down with Pepto-Bismol.

I like pink.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 TRUVY I hope the photographer brings a wide-angle lens.

I think it's embarrassing and awful. But Mama made me have my cousins, and Margi St. Maurice.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 M'LYNN Shelby? About what Jackson said...

I'd rather not talk about it, Mama. What happens in my life now is between Jackson and me. Jackson will take care of me and I will take care of him.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 25 M'LYNN Oh. Dear me. Uh. Don't worry. She's probably not taking her medication. I'll check on her Monday. (Beat.) Shelby? Would you like to finish off that juice?

I'm fine, Mama. You finish it.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 22 M'LYNN She's got a little too much insulin, that's all. She'll be fine if we can get something in her. Drink some more, Shelby.

I'm going to leave if you don't leave me alone.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 TRUVY Sit up straight. I've got to gild the lily. Now. Are you going to take it down after the reception? I'll be glad to give you a touch-up before you leave on the honeymoon.

I'm going to leave it up as long as possible.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 M'LYNN Drum and I feel that Shelby should not work anymore after she gets married.

I'm so anxious to discuss this topic for the nine hundredth time this week.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 25 TRUVY I used to have one, but I slammed it against the wall when I couldn't figure out where the batteries went. I know now I was the victim of premenstrual syndrome.

I've gotten four radios for wedding presents. I'll give you one.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 TRUVY That's so sad.

It happens all the time.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 14 M'LYNN Of course I have pink.

It has to be delicate.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 M'LYNN The rehearsal was an experience.

It wasn't that bad. It was out at Jackson's uncle's place on the river.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN There was no way around it and you know it.

It will be pretentious. Daddy always says, "An ounce of pretension is worth a pound of manure."

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 CLAIREE Why would you go and do a thing like that?

It's O.K. now. We worked it all out.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 24 M'LYNN Oh, Shelby... no.

It's my wedding! I'll stick baby's breath up my nose if I want to.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 TRUVY An armadillo?

Jackson wanted a cake in the shape of an armadillo. He has an aunt that makes them.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 M'LYNN Well. At least I talked her out of that stupid idea of sticking that baby's breath in her hair.

Keep your head in the sink, please.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 TRUVY Now. Let me guess where your honeymoon is. I picture tropical. Moonlight for days. Secluded. Somewhere where you can be intimate out of doors...

Las Vegas.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 21 M'LYNN (To Truvy.) Shelby? You need some juice. (Tries to give Shelby a drink.)

Leave me alone.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 and 19 TRUVY I am wearing a sexy blue chiffon, Shelby. Jackson's gonna take one look at me and leave you behind in the dust.

Mama's dress in gorgeous. It cost more than my wedding dress.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 23 and 24 M'LYNN What Jackson said about children... about adoption... was wonderful. And very wise. Not being able to have children is no disgrace. (Silence.) Shelby? Did you hear what I said?

Mama. I know all about adoption. And I also know about the limitations of this body of mine. I would never do anything stupid.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN The poet laureate of Dogwood Lane...

Mama. I wish you would get off Daddy's back. He gets enough hassle from Miss Ouiser.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 21 CLAIREE (Refilling the glass.) Who can blame her. Juice after a peppermint?

Mama. Stop it. I have candy in my purse.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 14 ANNELLE (Looking at the card.) Oh. Piece of cake.

Mama. This color is all wrong. It looks like a stuck pig bled all over my hands.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 CLAIREE Of course I do. I remember everything. The flowers, the food. Ousier was my maid of honor. Shelby, I hope you and Jackson will be as happy as Lloyd and I were. We had such a good time. Until last November... at least he hung on through the state playoffs.

Miss Clairee. There are still good times to be had.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 25 M'LYNN A lot. But a small town radio station can be a license to print money if it's run right.

Miss Clairee. You should buy KPPD. You got plenty of money.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 TRUVY Let's just face it, Clairee. You're a woman coming to terms with her grips. You and I are on the same boat. My kids are leaving town and I've got a husband that hasn't moved from in front of the TV set in fifteen years. It's up to us to figure out why we were put on this earth. That's today's sermon. So. Shelby. Are you and Jackson going to live in west Monroe or Monroe proper?

Monroe of course. His law practice is there.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN I ask you. How precious is this wedding going to get.

My colors are blush and bashful. I have chosen two shades of pink. One is much deeper than the other.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 TRUVY Are you going to quit nursing?

Never! I love it. I love being around all those babies... Last week we had this poor little fellow, two and half months premature. He looked like a big rat. I kept talking to him and holding him. But I knew he wasn't going to make it.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 TRUVY Hush girls. Shelby. Tell me things about the wedding. How many bridesmaids?

Nine.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 and 13 CLAIREE They're just anxious with so much going on.

No they're not. They just try to create as much tension as possible in any given situation. It's a creed they live by.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 18 M'LYNN I tried to talk her into using peaches and cream. That would be so lovely this time of year. All the azaleas in our yard are peach colored. Peach is so flattering to every skin tone.

No way. Pink is my signature color.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 M'LYNN But I thought I had made you understand the advantages of the Jaclyn Smith hairdo.

No, Mama.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 22 CLAIREE Talk to us, Shelby.

No.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 TRUVY Is he real romantic?

No. But he does give me flowers. And little presents if I bug him enough. He has promised to give me a red rose on every anniversary corresponding to the number of that anniversary. I think that's so sweet.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 TRUVY Oh. It was one of those last minute jitter things.

No. But the wedding's still on.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 M'LYNN Did you bring Truvy the picture of Jaclyn Smith?

No. I brought the picture of Princess Grace. I destroyed the picture of Jaclyn Smith.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 21 M'LYNN You didn't bring your purse, honey. Here. Have another sip.

No... (But Shelby drinks a sip.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 24 M'LYNN Fine. Fine. I am supposed to be the expert on behavior and I can't seem to manage the people in my own family.

Oh! Did you tell them, Mama?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 13 ANNELLE (Looking at the picture SHELBY brought.) How pretty...

Princess Grace...

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 TRUVY (Handing her some.) Here. Where's your mama?

Right behind me, I thought. (Annelle enters with fresh coffee)...

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 CLAIREE Oh sure. But I miss the whirlwind of being a mayor's wife. It's not easy being one. I don't like going around to things myself. If I go with another couple, I'm a third wheel. If I go with a friend, we're just a couple of old biddies.

Somebody like you should be able to find something to occupy your time.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 21 TRUVY Must run in the family. Shelby. You have such pretty hair... so thick... (SHELBY's head is beginning to drop forward. She resists Truvy's touch.) Hold your head up, darling.

Stop it.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 M'LYNN She does sweat profusely.

Thank you, Mama.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 M'LYNN It did not. It was on sale.

That's what she told Daddy. What she actually meant is that it was "for sale" not "on sale." (The phone rings.)

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 M'LYNN Shelby and I agree on one thing.

The groom's cake. It's awful! It's in the shape of a giant armadillo.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 M'LYNN I just hope your father doesn't get any magnolias from Ouiser's side of the tree. We'll never hear the end of it.

The wedding cake will be by the pool. The groom's cake will be hidden in the carport.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 M'LYNN Oh, boy. The romantic part. This is really what melts my butter.

Then we went skinny dipping and did things that frightened the fish.?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 TRUVY Now Shelby... fill me in on the reception.

There's going to be ferns and twinkly lights. There'll be magnolias in the pool.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 M'LYNN For dessert they served an original creation called "Dago" pie. I think that says it all. Jackson is from a good old Southern family with good old Southern values. You either shoot it, stuff it, or marry it.

They are simply outdoorsy, that's all.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 13 TRUVY You know. I was just reading an article in Glamour about tension during family occasions. It seems there can be a lot of stress and trauma. The thing I found most interesting is that stressful times can unleash dark hostilities that make your hair fall out.

They're fighting about patio furniture. Jackson and I will never fight about silly things. Are you married Annelle?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 14 CLAIREE I hope the rain holds off. I'm sorry it's not a prettier day.

This is perfect weather for me. I don't function well when it's hot. I love cloudy days.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 TRUVY There she is ! There's my girl! Come break my neck. (SHELBY's fingernails are wet so she careful when she hugs.)

Truvy. It's so good to see you! Morning, Miss Clairee! It's not that I'm unfriendly, I'm just worried about my nails.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 TRUVY Did you all do anything especially romantic?

We drove down to Frenchman's point and went parking.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 20 CLAIREE It's been a long time since we've had a youngster in this place, hasn't it?

We talked, and talked, and talked...

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 Truvy Today's Annelle's first day.

Well, Annelle. You're working with the best. Anyone who's anybody gets their hair done at Truvy's.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 TRUVY Absolutely. (A loud series of gunshots.) Shelby... uh you know I would walk on my lips to avoid criticizing anyone but your father is about to make us all pull our hair out. And that is bad for me business.

Well, he should be finished with his yard work soon.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 M'LYNN (Takes phone.) Yes Drum? I don't know. I haven't got it. I don't have it. Drum, if you're trying to drive me crazy, you're too late. For the last time... I don't have it. Ask the boys. Goodbye. (She hangs up.)

What did Daddy want?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 24 M'LYNN I will not discuss office business in a social setting. People need a place they can come unload their problems. I would not violate their confidence.

When mama says she doesn't talk, she means it. She's a brick wall.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 26 M'LYNN You see, our backyard is full of fruit trees...

Which are full of birds. Daddy has been trying to frighten the birds out of the trees by making loud noises. I didn't want the guests at my reception to spend all night dodging bird do.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 19 M'LYNN It's repulsive. It has gray icing. I can't even think of how you would make gray icing.

Worse! The cake part is red velvet cake. Blood red! People are going to hacking into this animal that looks like it's bleeding to death.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 M'LYNN Sweep it up?

Yes, Mama. Up. Like Princess Grace.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 TRUVY Well, now. That's a pretty romantic idea, isn't it?

Yes. I wish it had been his.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 17 ANNELLE I don't know. Today is very special. And my work tends to be too poofy when I'm nervous. Does your dress have to go over your head?

You can't screw up hr hair. You just tease it and make it look like a brunette football helmet.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 13 TRUVY This is so exciting. I feel like I am present at the creation. There is something so wondrous about the way a bride looks. I feel like it is beauty in its purest form. (Studying the picture and the bag of baby's breath.) Where are you going to put this stuff? There's no baby's breath in this picture.

You just stick it in. It's meant to frame my face. Baby's breath is part of my whole decoration concept. For a total romantic look. Notices Clairee's shoes.) Miss Clairee! what cute shoes!

Act One: Scene 1 Page 25 M'LYNN Why won't you drink it? It's going to be a while before the bridesmaid's luncheon.

You know what you need in here, Truvy? You need a radio. Music is wonderful to have in the background. It takes the pressure off having to talk so much.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 15 CLAIREE Lloyd and I missed it to fifty years by three months. That stinker. Bless his heart. He tried. He just couldn't make it.

You remember your wedding?

Act One: Scene 1 Page 12 TRUVY I hope so.

You're not the only one concerned. Mama's about to have a fit. She and Daddy are fighting like cats and dogs.

Act One: Scene 1 Page 24 TRUVY I wish I'd taken my boys there when they were little and straightened them out. I should've realized Louie had problems when his imaginary friends wouldn't play with him.

Your boys grew up fine. They're just a little scary that's all.