The Glass Menagerie Act 1 Scene 6

TOM: Yes. I really think he does in for self-improvement.

What makes you think it?

TOM: I've asked him to dinner.

You did?

TOM: Just one little warning, Mother. I didn't tell him about Laura. I didn't let on we had dark ulterior motive. I just said, "How about coming home to dinner some time?" and he said, "Fine," and that was the whole conversation.

I bet it was, too. I tell you, sometimes you can't be as eloquent as an oyster. However, when he sees ow pretty and sweet that child is, he's going to be, well, he's going to be very glad he was asked over here to have some dinner.

TOM: Mother! This boy is no one to make a fuss over.

I don't know how you can say that when this is the first gentleman caller your little sister's ever had! I think it's pathetic that that little girl has never had a single gentleman caller! Come on inside! Come on inside!

TOM: You have to face the facts. - She is.

I don't know in what way she's peculiar.

TOM: Mother, just one thing. You won't expect too much of Laura, will you?

I don't know what you mean.

TOM: I'd rather smoke.

Is there a moon this evening?

TOM: I thought you'd be pleased.

It's definite, then?

TOM: Across the alley was the Paradise Dance Hall. .... All the world was really waiting for bombardments.

Tom, where are you?

LAURA: Moon - moon?

A little silver slipper of a moon. Look over you left shoulder, Laura, and make a wish!

TOM: That's a secret.

All right, I won't tell you what I wished, either. I can keep a secret, too. I can be just as mysterious as you.

TOM: I did.

And did he - accept?

TOM: Aren;t you being a little bit premature? After all, poor Mr. O'Connor hasn't even appeared on the scene yet.

But he will tomorrow. To meet your sister. And what do I know about his character?

TOM: I will think that over and see what I can make of it!

Don't be supercilious with your mother! Tell me some more about this. - What do you call him? Mr. O'Connor, Mr. O'Connor. He must have another name besides Mr. --?

TOM: Not quite all - in the eyes of others - strangers - she's terribly shy. She lives in a world of her own and those things make her seem a little peculiar to people outside the house.

Don't use that word peculiar.

TOM: Well, Laura seems all those things to you and me because she's ours and we love her. We don't even notice she's crippled any more.

Don't use that word.

TOM: I have no way of knowing that for sure. I judge his salary to be approximately eighty-five dollars a month.

Eighty-five dollars? Well, that's not princely.

TOM: Very, very soon.

Every time I want to know anything you start going on like that.

TOM: what do you want to know?

Go ahead and guess. Go ahead and guess.

LAURA: What shall I wish for, Mother?

Happiness! And just a little bit of good fortune!

TOM: He did!

He did?

TOM: Now, don't get started on that!

He drinks, then.

TOM: As a matter of fact, he isn't. His face is covered with freckles and he has a very large nose.

He's not right-down homely?

TOM: Oh, very definite.

How soon?

TOM: Pretty soon.

How soon?

TOM: Quite soon.

How soon?

TOM: Now what are you up to?

I always did hate that cowlick. I never could understand why it won't sit down by itself.

TOM: Aw, don't be suspicious of me.

I am. I'm suspicious of every word that comes out of your mouth, when you talk to me, but I want to know about this young man. Is he up and coming?

TOM: It's more than I make.

I know that. Oh, how well I know that! How well I know that! Eighty-five dollars a month. No. it can't be done. A family man can never get by on eighty-five dollars a month.

TOM: Don't you remember asking me to fetch one?

I remember suggesting that it would be nice for your sister if you brought home some nice young man from the warehouse. I think I've made that suggestion more than once.

TOM: What for?

I want to ask you a few things.

LAURA: Yes, Mother.

Let those dishes go and come in front! Laura, come here and make a wish on the moon!

TOM: Why not?

That doesn't give me any time.

TOM: I don't see why you have to think at all.

That's because you just don't know. You just don't know, that's all. We can't have a gentleman caller coming into a pig-sty! Now, let's see. Oh, I've got those three pieces of wedding silver left. I'll polish that up. I wonder how that old lace tablecloth is holding up all these years? We can't wear anything. We haven't got it. We haven't got anything to wear. We haven't got it.

TOM: Time for what?

Time for preparations. Oh, you should have phoned me the minute you asked him - the minute he accepted!

TOM: All right, I'll guess. You want to know when the gentleman caller's coming - he's coming tomorrow.

Tomorrow? Oh, no, I can't do anything about tomorrow. I can't do anything about tomorrow.

TOM: No, I wouldn't say right-down - homely- medium homely, I'd say.

Well if a girl had any sense she'd look for character in a man anyhow.

TOM: At the warehouse, of course. Where else would I meet him?

Well, I don't know. Does he drink?

TOM: Mother, Mr. O'Connor is not a family man.

Well, he might be some time in the future, mightn't he?

TOM: He did.

Well, isn't that lovely!

TOM: I think it's here.

Well, those are all very illuminating facts. Facts that every mother should know about any young man calling on her daughter, seriously or not.

TOM: He goes to night-school.

Well, what does he do there at night school?

TOM: Yes, you have made it repeatedly.

Well?

TOM: Um-mm.

What did you wish?

TOM: Mother, you have to face the facts; she is, and that's not all.

What do you mean "that's not all"?

TOM: We are going to have one.

What?

TOM: I thought perhaps you wished for a gentleman caller.

Why do you say that?

TOM: I bet I can guess what you wished.

Why, is my head transparent?

TOM: Mother - you know that Laura is very different from other girls.

Yes, I do know that, and I think that difference is all in her favor, too.

TOM: Oh, I see. . . . Plans and provisions.

You are the only young man that I know of who ignores the fact that the future becomes the present, the present the past, and the past turns into everlasting regret if you don't plan for it.

TOM: No, not that I know of.

You have to find out. There's nothing I want less for my daughter than a man who drinks.

TOM: Mother, I want to tell you something and I mean it sincerely right straight from my heart. There's a lot of boys who meet girls which they don't marry!

You know you always had me worried because you never could stick to a subject. What I want to know is what's his position at the warehouse?

TOM: A gentleman caller!

You mean you have asked some nice young man to come over?

TOM: That's what I've always said, Mother.

You've always said it - you've always said it! How could you've always said it when you never even thought about it?

TOM: What made you ask me that?

Because your father did.

TOM: His full name is James D. O'Connor. The D is for Delaney.

Delaney? Irish on both sides and doesn't drink?

TOM: Mother, Laura lives in a world of little glass animal. She plays old phonograph records - and - that's about all -

Laura! Laura!

TOM: Shall I call him up and ask him?

No!

TOM: If you're going to make a fuss, I'lol call the whole thing off. I'll call the boy up and tell him not to come.

No! You musn't ever do that. People hate broken engagements. They have no place to go. Come on inside. Come on inside. Will you come inside when I ask you to come inside? Sit down.

TOM: You're not a sphinx.

No, I don't have secrets. I'll tell you what I wish for on the moon. Success and happiness for my precious children. I wish for that whenever there's a moon, and when there isn't a moon, I wish for it, too.

TOM: I'll call him up and tell him you want to know if he drinks.

No, you can't do that. You have to be discreet about that subject. When I was a girl in Blue Mountain if it was suspected that a young man was drinking and any girl was receiving his attentions - if any girls was receiving his attentions, she'd go to the minister of his church and ask about his character - or her father, if her father was living, then it was his duty to go to the minister of his church and ask abut his character, and that's how young girls in Blue Mountain were kept from making tragic mistakes.

TOM: His name is O'Connor.

O'Connor - he's Irish and tomorrow's Friday - that means fish. Well, that's all right, I'll make a salmon loaf and some mayonnaise dressing for it. Where did you meet him?

TOM: You don't have to make any fuss.

Of course I have to make a fuss! I can't ave a man coming into a place that's all sloppy. It's got to be thrown together properly. I certainly have to do some fast thinking by tomorrow night, too.

TOM: He's a shipping clerk.

Oh! A shipping clerk! Well, that's fairly important. That's where you'd be if you had more get-up. How much does he earn?

TOM: He's studying radio engineering and public speaking.

Oh! Public speaking! Oh, that shows that he intends to be an executive some day - and radio engineering. Well, that's coming . . . huh?

TOM: Any particular place you want me to sit?

Oh! Sit anywhere. Look! What am I going to do about that? Did you ever see anything look so sad? I know, I'll get a bright piece of cretonne. That won't cost much. And I made payments on a floor lamp. So I'll have that sent out! And I can put a bright cover on the chair. I wish I had time to paper the walls. What's his name?

TOM: It's rising over Garfinkel's Delicatessen.

Oh! So it is! Such a little silver slipper of a moon. Have you made a wish on it?

TOM: How come you made such a tragic one?

Oh, I don't know how he did it, but that face folded everybody. All he had to do was grin and the world was bewitched. I don't know of anything more tragic than a young girl just putting herself at the mercy of a handsome appearance, and I hope Mr. O'Connor is not too good-looking.

TOM: Icame out to smoke.

Oh, you smoke too much. A pack a day at fifteen cents a pack. How much would that be in a month? Thirty times fifteen? It wouldn't be very much. Well, it would be enough to help towards a night-school course in accounting at the Washington U! Wouldn't that be lovely?