Comm and Conflict Final

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Negotiation

A discussion between two or more disputants who are trying to work out a solution to their problem. -CONTINUE

Problem Solving Mediation

•These "typical mediators" work based upon the assumptions surrounding conflict •Disputants need to have their needs met, and a mediator works to provide satisfaction for those needs. •Mediators are keen to legitimize some stories and look at the orientation around settlement.

Ury says that third siders prevent, resolve, and contain conflicts. What are the three prevention third side roles? Be able to give a REAL example of each.

•Try this first: To prevent! ◦Providers: "what's needed here?" ◾ ◦Teachers: "Here's another way" ◾Students can teach ◦Bridge builder: "I'd like to introduce you to" ◾student groups could bring together police and students ***Witnesses also play this role

What are the four resolution third side roles? Be able to give a REAL example of each.

•Try this second: to resolve! ◦mediator: "Let's work it out" ◾ ◦arbiter: "What's fair here is.." ◾ ◦equalizer: "Let's level the playing field" ◾ ◦healer: "Let's make amends"

What are the three containment third side roles? Be able to give a REAL example of each.

•Try this third: to contain! ◦witness: "Hey looks what they are doing" ◾U.S public ◾almost anyone and everyone can be if you're there or read about it ◦referee: "No Knives, No guns" ◦peacekeeping: "Ok break it up!" ◾anyone who steps in directly

What, according to Hauss's article on apology and forgiveness, is the relationship between forgiveness and forgetting the wrong?

"I can forgive because I can remember. And because I can forgive". (holocaust example) We have to remember the past as we consider ways of making certain holocaust never happen again.

Name 5 key lessons you have learned in this class that will help you resolve serious conflicts in the future. Why do you think these lessons are critical?

Collaboration (Collaborative Power) Integration Active Listening I-messages

What are 5 key differences between debate and dialogue?

Debate: seek majority, dig in, tight structure, express, usually fast, win/lose Dialogue: seek understanding, reach across, loose structure, listen/learn, slow, no decision Deliberation: seek common ground, decide together, flexible structure, listen/learn, slowest, win/win (common ground)

Compare Hedeen's list of accomplishments of community mediation to Honeyman's discussion of the advantages of mediation in his article "Which dispute resolution process is best?"

•Hedeen: ◦the resolution rate; participants' satisfaction with the process, the mediators, and any resolution reached; perceptions of fairness; the durability of resolutions; and the cost and time efficiencies realized through the process. •Honeyman:Leaves control in the hands of the parties Can be relatively quick and easy Economical Flexible

What are the disadvantages of using skilled third parties to help transform or resolve a conflict or a dispute?

ADR: Alternative Dispute Resolution critics have concerns about legitimacy (charging ADR w/ "second-class justice" argued people who can't afford it are likely to use ADR these people are less likely to "win" a case bc of the cooperative nature of ADR critics believe ADR encourages compromise compromise is not appropriate for all disputes (cases of serious issues/intolerable moral difference) ADR settlements are private, not in public record/scrutiny allows dangerous companies to resolve issues with defective products harming consumers out of the public exposure, while court could force the company to fix problems or remove products

5. What does "self-determination" mean in the context of mediation? (This also is covered in the Hedeen article.)

Disputants retain decision making authority with regard to attendance at mediation, the extent of their participation within mediation, and the outcome of the mediation -Community mediation centers place a high priority on self-determination at every stage of conflict. Disputants retain decision-making authority with regard to attendance at mediation, the extent of their participation within mediation, and the outcome of the mediation. Where community mediation programs are operated with extensive community participation and governance, disputants have a further voice in the design of delivery of the program's services. It should be noted that anecdotal evidence demonstrates that high levels of community participation and governance are relatively rare.

Mark Gerzon asserts that "leadership" is a particularly problematic concept in the field of conflict studies. Why does he say that? What can be done to remedy this situation?

Leaders represent their "side". Yet leaders themselves are often one of the biggest obstacles in resolving conflict. Remedy: Three different efforts (sector, scale, and values) are what breeds confusion. Examining these dimensions will help define the different branches of the field of leadership studies and clarify its relationship to the conflict resolution field. -Sector: 2 major strands- political and public; business and private. Stereotypes between these strands (Between political and public; and business and private) cause gaps in language and perspective. -Scale: Where the elusive quality of "leadership" resides. Does it reside in an individual? In a group? In a community? In an organization? -Values: For some, the word "leadership" is a totally value-neutral term.. Anyone who influences others is a leader regardless of whether the impact is positive or negative. "A leader is someone with the power to project shadow or light" onto the world around him. The result can be a world "as light-filled as heaven or as shadowy as hell.

How do conflict communication skills relate to third party and third sider roles? Give examples to illustrate your answer.

do conflict communication skills = i-messages and empathetic listening???

Mediation

neutral "third party" helps disputing parties come up with a mutually acceptable solution. win-win mediation is essentially negotiation, with help -Mediation and Arbitration: -less expensive and faster than court -third party, a neutral -generally private and confidential (while court is public) -cost about the same (arbitration lawyers may be more expensive) -Mediation and Restorative justice: -restore relationships -restorative justice is a form of mediation (everything that applied to mediation applied here) --always in the room -parties make decisions -may or may not sign an agreement, but are not stuck until you sign the end agreement to mediate at 1st. -win-win possibility likely/high -Mediation is used for: -divorce unions labor management strikes foreclosures medical malpractice public safety

If I were to tell a story, be able to name which third side roles could best respond to the conflict (which means you need to remember what these roles are and what they do).

***Sometimes you need all ten roles •Sources of Tension & Ways to Prevent ◦Frustrated Needs: Provider (ensure that basic human needs are met) ◦Poor Skills: The Teacher (delegitimize violence, teach tolerance and practical problem solving) ◦Weak Relationships: The Bridge-Builder (bring people together) ◦Conflicting Interests: The Mediator (empower the weak) ◦Disputed Rights: The Equalizer (help people to search for a solution) ◦Injured relationships: The Healer (help parties overcome their feelings) ◦No Attention: The Witness (reports violent incidents) ◦No Limitation: The Referee (rules for fair fighting) ◦No Protection : The Peacekeeper (provide protection)

What are the benefits of apologies to the giver and to the receiver? What are the costs? How do the answers presented in class discussion (and the powerpoint) compare to the answer given by Hauss and those given by Stubbs?

-Benefits of apology acknowledge error/honesty save relationships maybe not harmonizing but on the way release of emotions -Costs calculated emotional rational +costs + benefits •Hauss: Without apologies and forgiveness, people remain locked in the value systems that produced the conflict. Even after the fighting stops, people still feel the pain, anger, fear, and hatred that produced the conflict in the first place. •Stubbs: Studies domestic violence as a focus to explore the appeal to remorse, apology and forgiveness in the RJ literature from a perspective that gives emphasis to victim's interests.

What are the benefits of forgiveness to the giver and to the receiver? What are the costs? How do the answers presented in class discussion (and the powerpoint) compare to the answer given by Hauss and those given by Stubbs?

-Benefits of forgiveness ability to move on work together emotionally cathartic -Costs to forgiveness festering problems do it right, feel it down low (stone, patton, heen) permission to walk on you learn a lesson forgive too fast moving on too fast can lead to lack of remorse (POSSIBLE TEST QUESTION)

What is the difference between dialogue and mediation? What are the similarities? Could mediation have been used in the Boston abortion controversy? (Explain your answer.)

-Dialogue is used when relationships are so affected by anger, hurt, blame, and distrust that engaging in an outcome-oriented process such as mediation, problem-solving, or coalition-building is unthinkable or too risky. -Dialogue is used when negotiation/mediation are unlikely to work because people are unwilling to compromise or negotiate -Dialogue doesn't involve contracts or written agreements -Dialogue doesn't involve resolve or reaching an agreement, but mutual understanding and respect

Be able to describe the basic steps of mediation.

-Introduction Of people (if necessary) Of process -Establish ground rules Opening statements -Ask "complainant" to tell their story. Mediator active listens, Reframes to separate the people from the problem To focus on interests, not positions -Asks questions To try to find areas of agreement and to identify continuing areas of disagreement. Tries to get parties to brainstorm options for solution, particularly options for mutual gain. -Helps parties evaluate options Consider fairness, and plausibility of options -Drafts an agreement (once parties choose an option) Parties help refine the agreement. Once it is approved, both parties sign the agreement.

Differences between mediation and arbitration

-Mediation: -always in the room -parties make decisions -may or may not sign an agreement, but are not stuck until you sign the end agreement to mediate at 1st. -win-win possibility likely/high -Arbitration: -less formal court -always not in the same place, -third party makes decision -always binding (sign a document, cannot be appealed) -win-lose tendency for arbitrators -court: does have same room but lacks cooperative communication -If restorative justice is mediation, retributive justice is typically what happens in court -judge makes a ruling and deals a punishment (judge acts as arbitrator) -often has negotiation or mediation (plea bargaining) Mediation is used for: -divorce unions labor management strikes foreclosures medical malpractice public safety Arbitration is used for: Power imbalance (Don't care about other party) rights, laws, right vs. wrong, little guy vs. corporation labor strikes consumer exploitation malpractice and use regulation patents/copyrights

What does "scale" and culture have to do with the concept of leadership (answered in the Gerzon article).

-Scale: Where the elusive quality of "leadership" resides. Does it reside in an individual? In a group? In a community? In an organization? Culture: Confusion about this question of scale exists particularly in cross-cultural conversations about leadership. Western leadership experts tend to view it as an individual characteristic. Elsewhere, in less individualistic cultures, there tends to be more stress on the collaborative, communal nature of leadership.

How does apology relate to face and how is this affected by culture? (This is discussed in the Han and Cai article.)

-When you apologize, you are losing face because you are putting down your guard and being vulnerable. Apologizing hurts face in the short term but builds up face in the long term by building trust. If it is obvious that you are wrong, you are hurting face, but if you take responsibility and offer up a solution for it you gain face in our culture.

What is "face negotiation" and how does that relate to (1) conflict styles and (2) apology? (This also is in the Han and Cai article.)

1.) Face-negotiation theory has been tested using both individualism and collectivism as well as independent and interdependent self-construals. -Studies investigating cultural differences in managing face concerns in interpersonal conflicts -People from different cultural orientations will attend to different face issues, with collectivists more concerned about positive face (especially of the other person), and individualists more concerned about negative face (especially of the self). 2.) Apology: Apologizing can be a double-edged sword: On the one side, the offender is likely to be perceived favorably due to the effort to amend relations with others; on the other hand, the admission of guilt clearly establishes that the offender is at least partly to blame. (Example: Car accidents). Apologizing could ultimately lead to losing face in certain situations. -Autonomy or negative face threat for the offender. -The offender also may resent the victim, especially if the victim is viewed as partially responsible for the offense (positive face for threat for victim).

Be able to describe the basic steps of arbitration. What are the benefits and costs of arbitration when compared to mediation? When compared to court cases (litigation)?

1.Arbitrator usually meets with each side separately 2.Asks them to tell "their story" 3.Asks lots of questions to determine who is right 4.May ask for documentation of assertions 5.After hearing both sides, arbitrator makes a decision 6.Issues it in writing and submits it to the parties 7.Almost impos sible if you want to appeal -arbitration is binding as soon as you sign the "agreement to arbitrate", mediation is not binding until you sign afterwards. Almost impossible to appeal an arbitration agreement -In arbitration THEY make the decision, not you and other party -Arbitration compared to mediation: Arbitration is private, less formal court, where the arbitrator is the judge. Arbitration allows someone who might have a professional outlook on the situation suggest a mutually beneficial resolution. -Use mediation when you care about the relationship or is something personal, and use arbitration when ou don't care about the relationship and about rights (legal). BASIC STEPS OF ARBITRATION: o Arbitrator usually meets with each side separately. o Asks them to tell "their story" o Asks lots of questions to determine who is right. o May ask for documentation of assertions o After hearing both sides arbitrator makes a decision, o Issues it in writing, and submits it to the parties o --who are BOUND to abide by it. o It is VERY DIFFICULT (almost impossible) to appeal (challenge, reverse) arbitration rulings.

According to Hedeen's article about community mediation, does that form of mediation provide legal "due process"? Explain your answer.

Community mediation was embraced as an empowerment tool for individuals and communities to take back control over their lives from a governmental institution (the courts) that was seen not only as ineffi- cient, but oppressive and unfair. This vision included equipping citizens to resolve their own disputes and the building of a truly alternative system that would keep many disputants from seeing the inside of a courthouse. (void of due process)

When is debate usually used? Dialogue? Deliberation? Compare the powerpoint and class discussion to the NCDD article "What are Dialogue and Deliberation?"

Debate: -Most useful when: A position or course of action is being advocated and winning is the goal (compete, argue, promote opinion) (win/lose) Dialogue: -Most useful when: fear and distrust are high, but people want to de-escalate a situation (exchange, discuss, build relationship) -Structured conversation or series of conversations.. intended to create, deepen, and build human relationships and mutual understanding. Deliberation: -Most useful when: a decision or criteria for decision, about the best ways to approach an issue or problem is needed (weigh, choose, make choices) (Win-win: common ground).

Why did the Public Conversations Project chose to use dialogue to de-escalate the abortion conflict in Boston? Why didn't they use debate or deliberation? Would these be possible to use in that situation? Explain your answer.

Dialogue: Created an environment in which people feel safe enough to be able to listen differently and also to be able to speak in ways that don't alienate the other party. Held to rules no matter what circumstances. "I can disagree with you and I can like you." -Dialogue doesn't involve resolve or reaching an agreement, but mutual understanding and respect -Dialogue is used when relationships are so affected by anger, hurt, blame, and distrust that engaging in an outcome-oriented process such as mediation, problem-solving, or coalition-building is unthinkable or too risky. -Dialogue de-escalates the situation

Name 5 key lessons you have learned in this class that will help you prevent serious conflicts in the future. Why do you think these lessons are critical?

I-messages active listening Reframing: (To avoid framing errors- assuming you know what the other person thinks; that they see things as you do; assuming that you are right) Every strong statement contains some important perception. There usually is an underlying interest that prompted the strong statement. Reframing will help us avoid framing, therefore preventing conflict. Avoiding the four horseman: (Criticism, Stonewalling, contempt, defensiveness)- These ruin relationships/friendships

How does "narrative mediation" differ from "problem solving mediation"? (This is discussed in the Winslade-Monk-Carter article.) What does the mediator do differently in narrative mediation from problem-solving mediation (Problem-solving mediation is the kind of mediation I taught in class.)

Narrative Mediation: Narrative Mediation (NM) does not believe that the typical mediator can in fact remain neutral. Typical mediators are unlikey to look at all cases the same after being exposed to so many. NM looks at mediation and the underlying stories that brought the particpants there in the first place. Plot development The dispute in NM does not come from a situation that needs to be set right, but from the differences between the disputants themselves. A mediator in NM will explore the stories the disputants have to share by asking questions to elaborate on independent conversations, recover unshared as well as valid experiences, and making sure an alternative story is accurately understood. Problem Solving Mediation These "typical mediators" work based upon the assumptions surrounding conflcit Disputants need to have their needs met, and a mediator works to provide satisfaction for those needs. Mediaors are keen to legitimize some stories and look at the orientation around settlement.

What are the differences between retributive justice and restorative justice? What are the benefits and costs of each? How does the answer given in class by Heidi and by Abby Whipple (the RJ guest speaker) compare to the answer given by Stubbs in her article "Beyond Apology? Domestic violence and critical questions for restorative justice."

Retributive Justice-->Authority-->Laws Broken, Punishment Restorative Justice-->response from community-->harm caused→ obligations or responsibilities to undue harm, the goal is reconciliation •Why Restorative? ◦lower recidivism (not repeating behavior) ◦Greater potential for learning + healing ◦gives victims, community, and the offender a voice ◦avoids blaming, shaming, punishment ◦promotes community connections ◦cooperative, not adversary

What is the difference between "the third side" and third parties? Who are "third siders"?

Third siders may or may not be involved in the conflict & and third parties are neutral and never involved. •Third siders: mediators, arbitrators and facilitators (Third Parties) ◾Sometimes neutral, sometimes partisans •who help prevent, resolve and contain conflicts. •everyone can be a third sider The Third Side is made up of both insiders, such as friends, family, and even the parties themselves, who are in turn actively supported by outsiders, such as neighbors, neutrals, and bystanders.

Narrative Mediation Continued

When we speak about a narrative approach, we are not just referring to the story-telling process that might occur in mediation. Rather, we are referring to a usage of the word narrative that urges us to see all events as taking place within, and being shaped by, larger stories. 1. Listening to the stories 2. Deconstructive inquiry 3. Searching for unique outcomes 4. Building a counterplot 5. Generating options 6. Documenting change 7. Reviewing new history The narrative brings out facts, feelings etc. When both parties tell their version of the narrative, perspective comes alive and disputes can be solved

What is the role of the BATNA in negotiation? In mediation? In arbitration? In restorative justice?

•Negotiation ◦parties can Pursue their BATNA at any time •Mediation ◦parties can back out and pursue their BATNA at any time, until they sign the agreement •Arbitration ◦Walk in to the discussion, sign the agreement, and you're stuck •Restorative Justice

Arbitration

neutral "third party" listens to both side's argument and then makes a binding decision about the solution. win-lose -Mediation and Arbitration: -less expensive and faster than court -third party, a neutral -generally private and confidential (while court is public) -cost about the same (arbitration lawyers may be more expensive) --less formal court -always not in the same place, -third party makes decision -always binding (sign a document, cannot be appealed) -win-lose tendency for arbitrators -court: does have same room but lacks cooperative communication -If restorative justice is mediation, retributive justice is typically what happens in court -judge makes a ruling and deals a punishment (judge acts as arbitrator) -often has negotiation or mediation (plea bargaining) -Arbitration is used for: Power imbalance (Don't care about other party) rights, laws, right vs. wrong, little guy vs. corporation labor strikes consumer exploitation malpractice and use regulation patents/copyrights

What are the advantages of using skilled third parties to help transform or resolve a conflict or a dispute?

•aka Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR): •Advantages: ◦less formal ◦more consensual than court ◾(direct participation by disputants) ◦faster and less expensive than court ◦outline process and define substance of agreements ◾(believed to increase outcome satisfaction and compliance with agreements reached) ◦more cooperative and less competitive ◦generates less escalation and ill will between disputing parties ◦beneficial for ongoing relationships ◾ (ex: child custody or labor management cases) ◦Private


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