essays that worked for college applications
Nicholas Karno
about knight resist the applications the king of admissions wants to get holy grail of college entrance, king wants applications and life painted out, risk giving in or isery, want sstanzas and life painted in stanzas and return the printed envelope to mercury by nine, will not budge, so then yield and then takes a chance, love hate hand, take a chance and set into mind
why are college essays important
although numbers are important, essays are a way to stand out from the others, no interviews no filtered through an interpreter, your raw self
what irritates an officer
arrogane, pretentiousness, no personality in an essay as it is place to express individuality, don't list like the "in" organizations i.e SADD SafeRides, or Whos who of American high school senior
tips for writing essays about obstacles
carefully handle problems, studnets have many crises, sharp, honest detail no self-pity, go through crisis strong independent and ready, two writes write about bad circumstances, alicia jordan sympathy, 2 others bad circumstance, jennifer Dodge in whomp avoid syrupy glorificatons and instead cheerful tone, last essay take guts to write and write of stuttering problem
Michael D Schill
cartoon one and talks about his search for knowledge and talk about human condition and search for nowledge
Realization essay tips
demonstrate how thoughtful, sensitive, responsive, more insight, think small as not life changing yet, relate incident and then with sharp detail much better than life changing, event in life not earth shattering= maturity, religion are tricky and not worth taking as full of cliches and vague, key part is realizing more room to grow, Neil Mehta= precision and clarity about real lessons, understanding own otivationsin lie, second essay has insight and dissolve bitterness with humor and understanding, Elizabeth McLeer laugh at herself, family bankruptcy change him and get involved in charity, visit to penpal life philosophy, already on way to realizaion bt omething catalyze change, tough to do this and lots of effort
John L Sigalos
detailed description of 91 year old lady, old and rustic apartment, talk about the china set with L for LeFevre as weddign gift, bedroom tiny and barely furnished, only decoration crucifix from father, says tearful goodbye, try not to cry as he think of her husband and sons leaving for war and then he is next to say goodbye, he thinks she thinks of hiim as a soldier that gave her cigarretes, think of himself as great-grandson she never had and then leaves
name withheld, realizaiton, my three sons
discuss y three sons, ideal father gives advice but his dad didnt, all children see parents as ideal but after divorce and father neglect this image shattered, see faults in dad and begin to develop idealistic standords for everyone leaving him disillusioned, dad visit on weekends and conflicting interest books vs sports, made her want to strive to be opposite, then hwhen began to communicate father say regard for interst and jealous of her, apologize fo rcommunication and neglect, reconcile beliefs and left her feelign good, realize that idolizing is bad and a bad pursuit and that love is forgiving imperfections, realize that things may be flawd but can still change leading him to want to rally to change curriculum, now shift from perfectionist to want to help others, strive for excellence has not disappeared but perfect is being tolerant and compassinate towards others, belief that children defy inorder to grow up and ma be that divorce interrupt this stage and better off with these obstacles as they help them grow
what is the warning
do not copy or change the essays in teh book around, this will guarantee a rejection and admissions officers are familiar with the book i.e. Georgetown officer find that the essays that worked book had been used so the student was denied
Alicia Jordan, Momma, Daddy, J.D. and Me
doesnt know who is the greatest influence on her, many difficult time and mom dad and jack daniels influence her, dad too man paitnets so late to pick up Laura, dad lost and overwhelmed, mom cook and not good but then take sister to church, dad throw out and cook, neighbor say mom was nowhere to be found, no one heard from her so go back to homework and wait, waited outside for dad again who was late and then immediately hug, mom killed herself, force her to grow up and take care of siblings, used to it as mother taught her to be a "woman" as from the south, mom alchoogolic so dad and her had to do work, dad and her close and her mentor, now understand to accept other and be independent, learnnig the skills to survive and live, jack daniels allow mom to ruin life nad her to shape personality, develop courage
Offbeat Essay warnings
dont be obnoxious or innapropriate, can easily bacfire, most witty essays arent even funny, think of the audience what you find funny may not be for the reader, big gamble, let many people read offbeat essay before you read it
What to do when write about relationships
dont have to apt yoursef on back and write about only good things, take officer on journey and path of discover to make personality hine
Daniel Ross
donut boy, applied to work at donut store, went ot johns hopkins center for talented youth and made freinds, and told best student ever had, learned how to deal with real world, work with Mildred and Kathy who are old and foul mouthed but are nice, he respects them both because of work ethic and happy that he is going to college, when work alone in afternoons get to know many types of people and interact types of people and talks with them, told he must clean and cleans iwth a smile, he then gets a raise and says good job merit increase good with customers and dependable
Before you finalie it
double check for mistakes, simplify delete wordiness, be neat, show it to teacher or counselor, ask if its intersting andphotocopy essay
Barbara Bluestone
enjoys cooking and baking, has a recipe stated for cranberry bread, flour is like snow on the west in Penn with cold weather and reading inside, baking powder alt and soda and estimate these as innocent mistak not adventuring, adding more chocolate, ornge juice like poetry color vibrant and new ideas and emotions, own poetry is like freedom ideasthat are confused can add to richness of poetry, butter melted like tech and explaining the stock market and goal to be mba, two egs and nuts like brother who likes nuts and used to hate nuts, school is a mix ofpeple that might not know where going but they are going somehwer, atmosphere of purpose, cranberris last ingredient like autumn which gavortite season, then bake and eat
self-description essays tips
essays ask you to describe yourself, easy to write about yourself as high schoolers have self-revelation, hard to make writing interesting and memorable, people say I've learned important my friends are or parents and I better relationship which are so cliche and lack imagination, Steven Branda= ordinaries and subtle humor, Daniel Burrows= average people vital to success, Dylan Tweney= brimming with excitement an dpotential, Williams college says blow them away and imaginative, creative, complex, bold, senstvie, rich in imagery unusual structure, Melinda Menzer= teleginesis, ketchup, positive thinking and ambition, Sarah Chinn- energetic funny, Michael Meusey- creative relaxed playful essaym ad fun writing the piece, essay wordy and intro long tho, stanford ask one adjective, and people think writing one word is good but that annoys officers
Inrid Marie Geerken
explain who she is and struggle to write, struggling to find inspiration, then think could the classics authors even write an essa, she then things what they would write ,think of hemmingway, fualkner, EE cummings, shakespeare, JD salinger, David thoreau, Freud, Arthur Miler, then she says the she is herself and live intensely when goes to cllege she will bring the works of authors nad lists what she will bing and what she wants more than anything else is to go to UNC
Andrew C Hiss
family let him decide who he wants to be, when grandpa had emphysema he would want ot spend time with him talking about things, realize values linked to grandpa, miss his company, parents influence racism by adopting a black sister and doesnt see race, doesnt understand racism or concept of it, kid had a "n***er" beater and think about the black people in his area and how they are viewed as they dont see them a lot, racism stem from ingnorance and fear, example of family not pushing and preaching but more guiding his values
Essays about home tips
for those who dont have the trip to the amazon or charity program they have home, many material and hoemtown, Erin Mille Round Pond Maine sleepy town but writes abotu color and charm, Ryan Riggs deends Memphis and champions reputations, Maeve O'Connor abotu remembering father is warmes one int he book, feel pain and loss but tone optimistic and strong, Sterry Butcher essay about Oklahoma is much grimmer, vivid picture of small town, fine writin and sharp detail, Isaiah Watas Cox mmorable tale about hsi upbringing and middle fo nowhere IDaho
Isaiah Watas Cox
grew up in middle of nowhere Idaho USA, familt lived on river and surrounding were about fifteen other people, live with grear uncle "Buckskin Bill last of mountain men), lived like apache and Sylvan came with his great great grandfather here, no schools so go to hojme study program, sent books and supplies and tested themselves, learned how to pace himsel, teach himself and learning more effort than time, enjoyed school, best way to avoid real work, when move to oregon mom want to send to real high school but dad had no problem with no social interaction as raised in kansas vs mom raised in detroit, father has history of pioneering, father busineess invovled in candad, wilderness alone not been enough butfather want him to be educated adn intellectuals like predecessors, realize nature is not benign but more alienating, belief in mother nature as good and benevolent and man reedy but nature not always good, natrure kills, thoreau never eperienced nature and could just get food but salmon river kill at least one per fam per generation, sylvan love books and learning, inuits had to ills childeren and kill others, as noble savages, good life is possible without material things but knowledge is needed
Ryan Riggs
hate misconceptions but will always exist, everyone has misconception about hometowne, everyone thinks of mmphsi as hometown of rock and roll elvis presley and many think he adores elvis, the think he adores and loves Elvice, he does not love elvis and has only gone there to appease guests, went with friend from boys state to see elvis' house and then wen tot meditation gardens and then went back to tour bus, he hates elvis because he had everything then threw it all away, he knows how not to use things he gets, he doesnt want to be like elvis and let wealath ruin him, refuses to allow elvis to domate conception of his city
three adjectives to what admissions officers are looking for
honest, creative, expressive
what does writing style tell an applications officer
how they think i.e. EB WHite, editorial pages, sincere and moving like a diary letter to a friend
what are the four types of essays that the admissions officer claimed he read
i went to europe and learned how coplex the world is, I lost but learned sports essat, class president, yearbook editor and he hates them
Carly Kiel
in africa made of hut wals and watch tribal dance, on mission tripm, saw child who has poor clothing phoenix suns t-shirt, she talks to the boy and asks name was Saidi, she gave him candy, child smile and she wants to fie him clothes, Carly underpacked and only broght two tshirts and one long sleeve, she gives kid tshirt, Saidi give her a bracelet made of giraffe tail, Carly give long sleeve to chief son to give to whoever need it, freezing now but the twiga bracelet make her feel warm
special thanks
joan lippman, diana russel, joan jacobson, plagiarized.com, amy argetsinger-washington post (plagiarism)
smart kid
known as braniac and weirdo but very smart, mom depressed and divorced nad hiospitalized so left to grandma, live with mom and things were going well, but then realize that grandma and grampa were really raising her narrow-minded, heritish and didnt trust mom, mom improve life and hope they could be normal, but still grandparetns house and angry at mom for not standing up to them, dad die and grandma cancer, mom yell that she is going to die but grandpa would mellow out, grandma died then mom was getting sick, feels cheated that mom is dying like dad, but in college finally have control over her life
Jillian B Myrom
last day of babysitting, finally have a differnet job, take care of girl with spina bifida who need to be catheterized to reduce ossbiility of virus, aaron came running in followed by brother, looking for drawing of voltron, found them and said wanted to send them to news station for contest to be on tv, never knew that six year old could be so artistic, so was going to play life but had to catheterize the girl, so she caths her and girl caths cabbage patch doll, so go back and find gaem set up, kids ask to go to park tomorrow but say today last day, kids say not coming back and kids think she doesnt like them, but says no shell be working at fast food and then mom and dad return home, dad give check and tied shoelaces and thanked, she then leaves for last time moving on to new things
Mave O'Connor
last thursday was father's birthday, he would have been 53, mom was remembering him so thinks do things that dad would have done and listen to beethoven, ate by candlelight, then went to get ice cream where dad went for special occasions, cold and wearing fathers sweater, it has holes and the dad used to wear it but then she doesnt fix them as she loves the holes
what does the officer like to see
look athimself forom outside, entertaining or humourous but not innapropriate, talk about life but not a "sell" i.e. student write about how people should clothe and feed poor but never volunteered in anything like that, needs honesty, brevity, risk taking, self-revaltion, imaginativeness, fine writing, feel good for writer=feel good for reader
Joe Clifford activities
loves baseball and sports, when yong dad would throw ball directly at bat so get a hit, it was heaven to him, continued to crace blac and white conflicts, loves to picture himself being praised or imagine himself in situations with commentators david vs goliath mind games, sports influence his life, sports not the thing with dsicipline or self-control, life is a big gray area instead with life being more complex and not me vs the world however has taught him to accept challenges, and picture himself as david vs the goliath of senior year accept challenge like baseball but cant solve it like the dad did with wiffle ball
David Bologna
loves oreo cookie, loves the doublestuffed ones, list of what to do, 1. make sure mom buys them, 2. buys milk as well, glas must be short and fat to dunk, recline and pig out one at a time, 1.dunk half the chocolate piece in milk and eat it, toos the remaining half to the dog, tshort itme dunk rest and eat, nabisco is beaver bite, front death screap down along cream and hten fling head back and eat, fav method isbuild a bigger cookie, cream fillign stacked and either give cookies to dog or eating them and then eat, make sure every drop of milk consumed and rinse glass to get another drink milk,
China Trip
meets a lady named Lin Yan who was best friend at cmap in China, Yan has so much work, father considerd bad for speakign out Yan has confidence to face challenges and dedication to effort, dreamed and then realize friendship changes common events into good experiencesand better than material items, family prefers experiences moving, and having intimate and personal experiences rather than material and grandiose, wants to have friends and realize freiends say that they hate the material things but she values the cuture and friendships, i.e say dwaybuchi after bumping into someone and they laugh about her speaking chinese, think of sinigng for the villagers in mongolia and experience changes perspective of China as evil and commuist and chinese peole are warm and nice not hate culture but country itself
Joe Clifford
metaphor for life, tv in a sun room with many windows, heard a fly buxxing, fly then got stuck between a window and a blind, then fly killed and thought about it, then thinks of philoophy that all of us are flies trapped between the venetian blind and the window, we=everybody, are=link noun to modifier, all of us- emphasize we, flies-everybody is like a fly, trapped- helplessness, no way out, between-relate trapped bind and window, the-only an article, venetian blind- clocks and watches time, and- conjustion, the- article, window- man looks at mortality and sets restrictions and limits he is trapped
Essays about activities
most written about topic, dont repeat what youve alread written about, personalize and analyze, what does it mean to you, what is your personality, what does it say about you, Joe Clifford explain what sports really taught him and challenge cliche, embrace mundane and bizzare, oters abut cooking and working in donut shop reveal personality, but dont be too eager and too outlandish but be creative, if you think application needs a lift try giving reader somethign different
Robin Bernstein
mother is feisty and fights over a lot, respect mom frstanding up for herself, then mom has breast cancer, cried for three hours and didnt know what to do, everything felt wrong, everything hurts, at hospital mom argue with nurse as nurse is sick and asks to wear a mask, she then revealed her fiestiness which creates comfort for author
Laurie Jane Sternberg
naviagte parents divorce, father say want daughter to change as she was too much like mother and doesnt fit expectations, first was to isolate and stay away, still love father, call father nightly talk one-sided convos, spend time with him talk, junior year want to be exchange student but father doenst believe in this, no value, so try to patiently talk and then allow abroad over summer, didnt want part-time job and wanted her to save and take time off, so compromise again to quit work when feel stress, have good relationship , learn to respect each other and compromise diplomatically
name witheld thought running shoes
never like new pairs of running shoes the same amount as the old pair, just dont feel right, no memories and no character, always tried to be a new shoe, belief in winning as only success, then realize that winning is not everything, when losing the election to best friend feel like a failure, didnt want sympathy or pity but be by herself, so she then decided to let the failure not define her and tried for the president of studnet activities which she thought suited her better and allowed her to interact with other people, this experience allowed her to take risks and scars of loss like old running shoes telling herslef what she wnet through
Name witheld the little prince
nicknamed the little prince as he would be the first son of a first son of a first son etc. very asupicious and predict comfortable and carefree life, grew up in new york and saw bads of life and only commnity service was shopping for baby at hospital and fill easter basket as poverty different world, then seventh rade father declare bankruptcy, klife upside down and lose home and move iwth grandfather, grades and social life suffered, when go to concert and told have to stay in chruch it hit him that he wasin an uncomfortale situation and realize he was homelss, move many times into different areas but 10th grade stay in one place, uncomfortable but realize the suffering in the world and this feeling, then beocme involved in community and people involved with him, problems of world didn't seem as distant and feel responsible t help, work and volunteer, realize most are like him, now feel responsibility to help others,
Do strange ideas or comments hurt+ anecdote
no admissions very tolerant i.e. person endorese anti-israel and admissions officer jew but he still get in, offbeat are a plus as kids try to relax and not guess what looking for, be from the heart, no best type of essay i.e quarterback, all-american, 3.8 GPA but write about stuttering
problems with college essay-writing websites
no unique voice, officers can detect when voice is not there, if caught application and admission could be rescinded, even when someone else writes it uniquely for you, it will still be plagiarised, hard to deceive admissions officers, not a risk worth taking, plagiarism is a risk that you're immidaetely rejected, bad essay does not equal immediate rejection
Catherine Sustana
on a road trip with Charlie McCoy playing, couldnt sleep and wanted to stay awake to see the Mississippi, watch out the window as things pass by, wake up and sun was up and see Ojlahoma, trip to west and seem spontaneous, remember the experiences in the West and remember friend asking for no souviniers but experiences, realize don't rips it is important to make memories rather than souviniers, has stories from every trip and the bridge serves as her point of memories and writing about adventure
Sarah Chinn
open about Judgement Day and not afraid, and there she will stand unafraid but facing void of heaven and hell, full of cantradictions and contrasting feeligns and opinions, there is freedom to her, she is english and self-assured, she is a senior and realizes that grades and scores dont tell everything but she is glad yale is not the judge and the real sarah chinn loves life, her incosacneis, and her unpredicatbleness, radical in politics hprocritical and change world without it changing her
what do essays in the book do
provide a perspective in the life of the students, officer wants to see what the teens experience throughtheir eyes, essay express individuality, officers want to know real you and not a fake verison of you
anecdotal tip from the author
put yourself in thier shoes, harvard reader who constantly reads the same things over and over again until comes across a recipe for cranberry bread that relates it to thier life
why does the book shock readers
readers expect boring and a planned out response instead of flashy, unique writing that stand out
ten groups of essays
relationships, travel, various obstacles, offbeat, self-description, essays about home, realizations, intellectual thought, activities, college applions process, pay attention to comments and styling
Barry Kaye
response to best advice you've ever recieved, move your ass was the best piece of advice a man yelled at him while crossing the street, second was from uncle that told him to go to medical school, then says if I would not taken advice gone to med school anyways as a cadaver
original essays that worked
rollin riggs mustang publishing
Jamie Mayer
saw an inchworm walking on a leaf, the inchworm was spiraling around, realize that the inchworm on a smaller perspective than he is, things on inchworms dont have much of an impact asa mans perspective, man very self-centered perspective, things can be oblivious to things due to their perspective such sa the dolphin who remains oblivious to cities and envies those that arent in the manmade world, allusion to horton hears a who and thinks of saving a planet from destruction the worm was not in the world he live in or aware of the man world but must protect these parallel worlds
Neil Weinrich
senior year and everything going smoothly, go to Nashville to watch football team, want state title, 20 seniors there to cheer, win and over the moon, at hotel and have cook-out, call parents to check up and find out grandfather died, not horrified, puts football game into perspective, went to NJ and miss all experiences with grandfather and misses the opportunities to connect with him, realize grandfather was beloved man with over 100 people at funeral, husband, kind to everyone, ideal, realize he must help others to leave same mark on others like grandpa, wants to be missed, youth group taech them to prepare for high school like grandpa who took oldiers under wing, grandma have flag and represent values fo grandpa and wants to have essay written about him
tips about travel essays
sooo many and then say world is complex or ppl share same hopes and dreams, only three/1000000 intersting, most dull and not enough details,inciteful, excting, difficult subject, hard to not be cliche, dont say I learned so and so, bring on experience that lets you see scenes and emotion, everywhere exciting if you have passion and appreicativeness
Joseph Wurzburg
speech therapist, feel frustration and pain, have togo to speech therapy, told to accept himself, and deep inside wanted to stop stuttering and big responsibilities but had low-confidence and believe that not worthy, stuttering was reffered to as hadnicap that people laugh at, realie this was controlling his life and needed to face his own fear, began speaking in public, began to lead thins and develop leadership things, learned to make best of his weaknesses, didnt fear failure anymore, thought was an obstacle was only a figment of imagination and can now reach full potential
what are the bates college looking for
students who write things that are mechanically sound, organized, and imaginative, writing in their own voice, students reveal themselves in this process and show their worth
Michael Meusey
talks about three adjectives to describe himself, thinks it would be easy, tall dark handsome, girlfriend says he is average and not these, then he says talented determine motivated, made him soudn good, then realize he cant explain those choices, then try to be acadmmeic wondow with studious scholarly intellectual but conscience says no, humorous brilliant gorgeous modest but no explanation, then liberal so semiomniscient quasiominpotent but not third, then added words in german, then finally says he is frustrated exasperated defeated, then come up with three and hten better synonyms in thesaroaus but this violates honor, experience shows three important traits persevereance, creativity, optimism, this ends quest for adjectives and then talks about next essay
Alexis Speros
the commerical appeal, scientist and conservationist 100 years old today, Speros preserved and protected the forest and river north of memphis through commitment and perseverance, spirit inspire others to develop environmental consciousness, Speros has many things sucha s teen camping tour then study mountain ecology, then microbiology lab at Univeristy of Memphis, environemntal conservation through research, Speros graduate froom Duke then Environemtnal manaement masters, then went ot memphis sierra club adn research adn techniques that allow her to go to arkansas and tenessee and writ ebest seller liking hiking, donate back to school, speros kayak nad riverguide, speros create foundations for public work nad vigor, speros recognized by family and lasting legacy
what does the author say to take profound in
the normal and find the normal things in life to fascinate about or fnd the trivial moments, does not need to be life-shattering moment
What is becoming common plagiarism-wise
"canned" essays, blatant plagiarism not as prevalent, many websites that guarantee a good essay, too much editing or plagiarism being immediately caught
what do the applicants in relationsips do
1. write about bigotry and family vs ideology (Marie Louise Buhler) has good writing style and last sentence "alone" powerful, care enough to think about man, 2. Rohin Bernstein family crisis with humor, Neal Weinrich grandfather (although long holds attention) death of gradnfather (one of best), Andrew Hiss unique family,
what to do before you start to write
1.begin thinking about essays when your're a junior and jave a journal, 2. senior year look at questons, 3. brainstorm and try several approaches, 4. think f topics that dont repeat whats on transcript, 5. lighten up and smile, 6. decide who will critique essays i.e. guidance councelor or fav teacher, 7. dont procrastinate
how many schools helped
20 top schools including harvard, duke, georgetown, davidson, williams, penn, rice, grinnel, stanford,princeton, oberlin, berkely, wllesley, john hopkins, unc, swrthmore, skidmore, uva, santa clar university, george washingotn university
Matt Weingarden
An untitled one-act musical, Matt-yale applicant, sponge-closest friend, chorus-high school students, Matt explanins he wants to go to yale for their classics department, english and science facilities, explains unsure of major but wants a variety of courses and college strong and well rounded, sponge hoes get in, chorus screams about matt applying, matt worried wont get in sponge says dont worry have ecs and play guitar etc chorus says please accept, matt says there are so many qualified people and then goes to class
Sterry Butcher
Bessie is a small town, grandmother lives there, too small for little children and an elementary school, residents are eldery, roughnecks, fixed monthly income, mobile homes, own personality with motorcycle gang, oscar who has overalls and gives her a quarter, Oscar cnat read or write anything but his ame and grandma helps his social secutiry check be filled and cashed in, Jane brings kids to her grandmother shouse and lives in tan trailer to watch weal of fortune and give kids a good meal, grandmother, quit job as cashier to be mayor but gave that up to keep eye on mother and garden, together feed stray cats and garden, administration want ot close indian rehabilitation cneter, study to find out if there was hune r in america and it showed none but she knows htere is in her town and if welfare cut thento n will blow away, and freeze medicare hurt people she knows
Daniel Burrows
Burrows is unknown and unnoticed, he just watches, he is always second and doesnt complain his job is difficult and important, has to be good but not in spotlight, in a world of stars he's a with but he wil always play his part to the best, hes the person who garnishes, he adds but isnt the star, but without him somethign would be issing, hes the narrator youve been wondering baout, wondering who the observer is, he can use imagination ot make up and talk about things, lieks bieng the best friend and heroes best friend you will miss when hes gone but not remember his name or forget him
writers in travel essays
John L Sigayos, friendship with old french lady, second writer imagery in china and language barrier but thrown off by need to preach lessons better to be one more specific lesson or clarify, Carly Kiel imagery doesnt preach and hint at heartof darkness without being too much, implies memory without sentimentality, Catherine Sustana trip within America sond inspiring and leave impressions superb
Marie Louise Buhler
Oma took her to laundromat and five years old in Germany, mother friend of Uncle Gert who own friend, father lawyer in Navy, Uncle Henry come who is old, he has fixxed income nothing to do but read and walk, Henry is chivalrous knight loved girl then told her to marry richer guy as it was noble, like a monk, scholarly, shakeseare, french studies, like in wrong century, refers to himself as this old man, skeptic abotu science, no one understand him, let no one into his life so he must sit alone
Applicant one, relationships
Scottish Jewish-American heritage, feel conflicting heritages, growing up in Berkely= develop social activist and left-leaning ideologies, see scottish relative (Uncle Rob) whom she loved, Rob turns out to be a misogynist, homophobic, racist etc. becomes angry but remember that they grew up in different background and realize that insolence comes in many forms not just extremists but people you love and Rob is family, accept family as they are, find that she is a puzzle and find a way to combine upbringing and heritage
Eve Berley
Stanley Albert Tukos behind people, confused, ask where I am, Tukos is in heaven, hit by a car, dead, two men in suits come, meet Malcolm and Harvey, Tukos wants to go home, but denied, Stanley says how come I didnt know I was dying and responded with it was very sudden, hes at heavens gate, Stanley asked who he is and he says he invented SAT, Harvey say son study ten months only 1050 and Tukos say its onl college edu Tukos made people miserable, asked if he did any AP work and Tukos asks what and aska botu charity, Maloclm say we might have to reject you but Harvey say do Heaven entrance exam, Tukos says didnt know going to die, says its pieve of cake but stanley is like I didnt take it, Stanley is told by Harvey got a 700 combined and its less compettive afterlife downstairs
Gail Lerner
thumbsucking, bad habit of hers, when need comforting she sucks her thumb, most stop in first grade, but she still does it, realtes to Linus from Peanuts, Linus is na inventor, artist and still sucks his thumb and is ready to face the world unlike Charlie, her nephew sucks his thumb and this makes her feel close to him when she is with him, she realizes that if thumbsucking makes her nephew feel confident then he should do it but if he stops shes fine with that, then attacks those who say thumbsucking is a sign of bad parenting and say surveys done by those who havent experienced this, and she realizes there will always be naysayers
holton arms school
tish peterson- abuse of book- admissions officer goergetown
Essays about the college applications process
tricky thing to do, good satire is tough, essays exaggerate too much, if point is valid dont worry about pulling punches, there is a caveat, lazy way out if you cant thing of a good topic you use this, irritateing as no thought put into it, poem whimsical and intellectual clever and amusingly written, student witty adn easygoing person who pokes fun at it but it is very gimmicy, Marjorie Just, short story and too long, describe parents eagerness to aid dauther but not reallyt rue, unsympatehtic to parents trying to help, Ingrid Marie Geerken misspell Hemingway but very witty, Micahel D Schills cartoon risky but break the mold nad offer insight into his personality, last piece takeoff on essay writing
Melinda Menzer
tries to move things with her head with telekinesis, fears beign ordinary, fears many things but doesnt want to be ordianry, anyoen can do it, reading crime and punishment made her think that the main charcter wants ot be special so he kills himself, but she doesnt want to kill but she wants to live a quite life eating soup and saltines writing or travelling the world doing ood, wants to change the world and a difference, shes a top of the jar cookie but is she a boring sugar cookie, or a great eccentric oatmeal-raisin one, she doesnnt want to be any cookie but she wants to be extraordinary
What is anecdote for plaigarisng
two student pilots and he finds that one has flying lessons the other does not, both are good students, both like internet, finds website that gives essay about a topic, finds essay the applicants submitted and both rejected and allerted about to other colleges
How to actually use internet in college apps
university's name followed by .edu and read and familiarize yourself about university, ask why do you want to go there, collegeboard useful information abotu sat, aplications, essys etc. nacac (national association for college admission counceling), get advidce and links to sourcers, available for free but internet alone, some collleges have online apps becoming more commonplace but must discover why want to go to place, turn off computer and write then put finished product in typing
Offbeat essay tips
unusual essay topics, risky but work, 1. My Nightly Ritual playful mood memorable images not repetitive, Gail Lerner= bravery embarassing but engaging, Matt Weingarden original format, confidence, Barry Kaye risky but laughable and humorous, metaphor for life clever satire on thought essay, funny, Eve Berley humorous fantasy works but barely as clever command of dialogue but nothing about herself and refreshing and good picture but lucky, alexis speros earlyd ecision, 100th birthday sincere interest and future intentions in newspaper article, quirky tone and wit become selling point
what questions are on college apps
vague open-ended something that will tell us about you and others are more specific but also allow for a unique image
Tips for while you're writing
1.make sure adressing question and nothing but it, 2. if using compute use spellcheck but dont overrely on it still proofread, 3. try differnt openers to catch interest, 4. fight writers block by brainstorm first draft, 5. leave essay alone at least a day then look at it again to finish it, 6. be open to criticisms and changes,
Elizabeth McLeer
14 spot a teenage boy, boy likes blondes so she wore a wig and talked to him, christmas eve they have a date, then had narrow pathway so wak single file and a branch got her wig, she then was revealed, the boys then grabbed the wig and danced and made fun of her then after chasing after it she gave up adn laughed, date then paid no attention and learned tha tmen had high standards of beauty but also not all males rigid as she developed long term social relationships and boys became interested in her becasue she was fun and approachable and girls liked her better after that so then realized that people prefer those not in perfect control but flawed, and realize in the long run the events werent humiliating but valuable as you can look back on them and laugh
Erin Spiotta
E-nergetic as learn to balance athletic academics leadership, R-esilient peer council and student council officer and realize that she took a risk and won office, I-nnovative- incorporate new ideas into school including icnic, N-urturing- teaching children of all ages how to swim and overcome fears, S-ervice-involved in leadership progam that fosters racial interaction and service, P-erspicacious- priority to academic interests and challenge herslef nad on honor roll apscholar and scholar athlete, I-ndustrious- use achievements to attain personal goals such as in many honor societies, O-ptimistic- look positively to future as leader of clubs and pursue career in international law, T-enacious- captain of carsity team and most valuable player and all tournament and all reion teams t-ough- run on mile relay and two mile relay sand wen tto state finals A-nticipation and ready to go to college
Dylan Tweney
He is blinded by science, saved by Zero, he realizes he is a soul trapped by body but skeleton does fine by itsellf and no one notice that this if beginning to crumble even when soul is gone, he is old and egotistical liek kronos, wants to be great, wanted to be the best ever in science and launch into studies and seas thought belong in but to others he is boring as he is delusional and make hismelf be rooantic, communicate in art, obsessed with everything, and was nin love with someone and then when love each other she leaves, he is emerging from essay intact and and hten done writing
Erin Miller
best experience was diverse environents, nyc vs rond pond travellign between the two Round Pond is tiny town a little round pond= harbor town, manhattan has more than maine, manhattan= island but to her islan= round pond harbor, islands are remote, main street i.e. only stree in round pon every mailbox from samelast names everone knows everone, differenes in culture, mom hardheaded and refuse to buy dryer to conserve elctricity which is insane to new yorkers as it runs on electricity, round pond cable less, social event of round pond is 4th of july parade, wherereas new yorkers have macys thanksgiving, round pond has everyone particpate and those in front stay to watch those in back, round pond watch own fire station burn, then they just watched it as the volunteers couldnt do it whereas nyfd watches nad prepared, fround pond reote round pind fraternize with russians via volleyball game whereas byc russian shut down new york
Ross Howard Reynolds
call armidillos stupid, in spanish class english was allowed, and take a break in spanish, Will Owen say used to hunt them at night and dumb and cant swim, friends were expelled for drugs and Keck knew of shock, talk about only one of them has seen a live armadillo, bearsighted and easiy frightened animals, final conclusion was armadillos suck, aramdillos dont adapt and just sit there and be stubborn, we may never diverge from being an armadillo, dont want to be an armadillo and be stuborn
Marjorie Just
can be funny when want to be, councelor say be original and not funny, hear father coming and would ask for facor or see how everyone doing, dad offer help and reject it, but dad ask her to help Tom and she says yes, thom loks ut ot her, dad ask to compare previous trips to finland and france and say improtant to show that you hae fears and insecurities and human, felt much mor esecure in finalnd but france she was in charge of others, thats what father said about th etrips and she dogs onh her father, dad offer help and she is annoyed, she just nods and pretedns to agree mom comes in and mom offers elp about elementary school and didnt give irls qual time on playing field then also suggests finalnd write what feel comfortable with, dad asks to write about finalnd, dad got angry when reject finland and then got angry and parents get in arguement and mom defend her but dad angry so dad say i didnt spend money tofinaldn so you cant write abotu it dad try to ask to write about it but continue to deny it
what is the question you should ask yourself when reading the essay
do I get to know the writer better? do I get to know this applicant?, studnet communicate something new and meaningful
Jennifer dodge
have word for bad expeirence whomp, was on balcony and then whomp fall and leg shatter, had physical pain, couldnt take shower, no johhing, no stand, life upside down, cast on for six months and realize this is what people deal with for a life-time, put perspectie into the hadnicapped, talk about developing relationships with handicapped kids, pair the students together, organizign the group is the best, the appraciation she gets makes ti great and breaking the leg has taught her abot the world
thought essay tips
most difficult essay to write, intellecually curiosu and disciplined mind, best an be hard to read, can be muddled by complicated words and sentences, if writing abstract write with something reader can identify, admissionf officers pressed for time so need to grab attention, most tough o read and only few on phiosophical topics, use familiar, tangible items to introduce and discuss deeper thoughts
Name Witheld college applications one
office of admissions cracking down on studnet adn team alreadys eeing candidates, one more to go, was playign cyclone and pinball, and then wins, then glanked by admissions officers, and asked is this what you do with your life and tell us about people who influenced you adn rush to find answer, then there was a man next to her and think about her friend mark who inspired her and then says asked these questions and then sees it like a iideo game
Neil Mehta
went ot christian school and preached to, most were christain but he was a jain, most didnt care, began questioning religion, jainism doesnt beieve in god but individual, doctrines disurbed him and in chrsitain world Christianity seem more reasonable, leaned further to christianity as others tell how god transform thier lives but realize their behavior incosistent with christian ethics, was confused and debtaitng religions, trust in relgiion becoming less and less to where doubting religions and having many perspectives, still practiced Jainism with parents and didnt want to tell parents of this conflict, got to know taekwondo teacher who was christian who had many spritiual and persobnable aspets i.e. very virtuouts, being student realize he was his own hyprocrite and was conforming instead of transforming, so told parents christin and discuss with parents and this led hi to feel better, learned about truth, soon tested himself and became vegan and told everyone to not repress things, now can openly disuss christianity and veganism and embrace beliefs
pen pal
went to prison to meet pen pal, guy didnt get many visitors, went to prison young but then undertand that friends worth these measures, hardened criminal show tenderness so anyone can, he showed him love and understanding, Ray joy and search for good in others, learn to search for seed of good in everyone
dean at bates college
william hiss
Steven M Branda
write abot people who have ifnluenced you, shaped you, or conflicts or goals and hopes or somethign significant, thought of highights of life, realize there is nothing in his life that has conflict, nothing shaping him, no chalneges, extracurriculars not promising, began to worryand needed to think of something extraordinary, then realize- he was boring, began searching for really exciting episodes in life, desperate to prove to himself he is not a boring person ask friends buty they just say hes boring, then says he is boring adn he ust be accepted as it provides diversity and for every wonderous person they need a boring person for balancing out and he hopes swarthmore will make him a more interesting person
what is the tip from the admissions officer
write about something that means something to them and tell beyodn scores, don't handwrite
