Pinocchio

Yes

............around the rubble?

I don't know.

Any-a these guys have a fan or excessive body hair?

Maybe it's frosty guy and his posse

Call it in

No, no. That's all OWW

Did you see anything besides the pile of sticks?

Yes. Ow.

Eight

The license plate SNOWMEN. Kinda hard to forget something that strange.

Excuse me.....?

Yes. Ow.

How about exactly five?

Hard to say

How many of em did you see?

Twice a day. OWW.

How often do you work out at the gym?

Okay, fine, FINE. My name isn't Marcus. It's Pinocchio.

Howsabout telling us who you really are, Namey McFake.

Uh, can I go now?

I don't need a math lesson. I need a results lesson! I got the commissioner, the mayor, and the Governor Grimm, all breathin down my neck-

Yeah, well I can explain that. I wasn't at the doctor for a routine checkup, if ya get my meaning. Right after getting my nose "taken care of", the doctor warned me that my nerve endings would still be sensitive to lies.

I don't understand. When you lied before it didnt look like your nose grew: it looked like you were in pain

Okay...

I see. Do me this favor: Answer yes to everything I'm about to ask you.

It actually used to be ten feet longer--because of my career.

If you got a nose job, why is it still long?

Yeah, everything's fine. I feel great. OWWW

Is everything all right, sir?

Excuse me, officers

Jiminy Cricket

Okay. I was walking home from a...doctors appointment...and I suddenly heard this noise. Like...like someone dropped a box of toothpicks. I look up and I see that mess over there. And that's it. Now can I go home? I'd rather not get wrapped up in a big investigation.

Just tell them exactly what you told me

SNOWMEN

Keep your nose outta this, will ya?

Okay, I'm what you'd call a test tube kid. There's this rebel scientist- my dad who created me and for some reason decided it would be a brilliant idea to endow me with an unbelievably enormous honker. I think he read in Maxim that women like men with striking features. He somehow translated striking as huge and feature a schnoz. So he merged the DNA of a human and an anteater and tadahhhh, Abercrombie model! Oh and as if that wasn't enough, Doctor Frankenstupid thought it might be, I don't know...fun A challenge?...if my nose were connected to my nerve endings in my brain in such a way that when I lie about anything, my trunk here grows three inches. How bout you? What's your life story? Pretty much the same right?

Let's hear it, Wizard of Schnoz.

How's it goin?

Let's move fast....

All right, you know, I realize that its part of a police detective's job to use bad puns to empasize points? But could you do me a solid and limit the nose humor? I' really sensitive about it

Listen, Rhino- you may have been through a lot, but that doesn't give you the right to disrespect them man who gave you life. After all, father nose best.

Yes. OW.

More than ten?

Yes OW.

Nine

No, OWW. Fine, fine. Ill tell you what I saw, but please keep me out of the papers. I don't need this sort of press.

Now did you see anything suspicious at the scene of the crime?

Well I guess there's no hiding it now.

Ohhhhhh. I saw you on Oprah.

Anything inaccurate-unfortunately

Out of curiosity does that thing only give you trouble during intentional lies, or do you experience pain whenever you say anything inaccurate?

See, that was uncalled for

Out with it toucan sam

Yes.

Seven

Yes. OW.

Six

Happy to help. Ow

Thanks

A gaggle

What do you call a group of geese?

I'm running for president.

What do you do?

I saw a bunch of people in basketball jerseys, poking around the rubble Once the sirens started up, they jumped into an SUV and peeled outta there.

What'd you see

Eight

What's the square root of sixty-four?

Uhh, I'm Marcus..Ow..Look, I told her what I know.

Whatsyername, Dumbo