The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People powerful lessons in personal change SG

attitudes and behaviors basic paradigms

It becomes obvious that if we want to make relatively minor changes in our lives we can appropriately focus on our ______ and ________. But if we want to make significant quantum change we need to work on our ______ _________.

If there is little or no trust there is know foundation for permanent success.

It simply makes know difference how good the rhetoric is or even how good the intentions are;

what / why

Knowledge is the theoretical paradigm, the _____ to do and the ____.

Public Victories. You can't invert the process any more than you can harvest a crop before you plant it.

Private Victories precede .......?

Circle of Influence. They work on things they can do something about. The nature of their energy is positive, enlarging, and magnifying causing the Circle of Influence to increase

Proactive people focus their efforts in the.....?

4, 5 and 6

Public Victories of teamwork, cooperation, and communication in Habits......?

URGENT Important Not Important

Quadrant I and III are both labeled? But Quadrant I is also labeled? And Quadrant III is also labeled?

Not Urgent Important Not Important

Quadrant II and IV is are both labeled? But Quadrant II is also labeled? And Quadrant IV is labeled ?

Effective self-Management. It deals with things that are not urgent but important

Quadrant II is the heart of .....?

1. Identifying Roles 2. Select goals 3. Scheduling 4. Daily adapting

Quadrant II organizing involves 4 key activities

On preserving and enhancing relationships, and on accomplishing results, in short, on maintaining the P/PC Balance

Rather than focusing on things and time, fourth generation expectations focus.....?

The habit of Proactivity

The first and most basic habit of a highly effective person in any environment ?

Mental creation Physical creation

The first creation is the __________________? The second creation is the _______________?

immediately applicable

To many, seek first to understand, becomes the most exciting, the most _____________ ___________, of all the seven habits.

Interdependent

life by nature is highly......?

The Character Ethic taught there are basic principals in effective living and that people can only experience

true success and enduring happiness as they learn and integrate these basic principals into their basic character

Interpersonal leadership self-awareness, Imagination, Conscience, Independent will

Think Win / Win is the habit of ____________. It involves the the exercise of each of the unique human endowments... which are, ________, _________, __________ & _____________

Habit #7

This habit surrounds all the other habits because it is the habit that makes them all possible/

principle-centered, character based "inside-out" approach to personal and interpersonal effectiveness.

This new level of thinking is what The 7 Habits of Highly effective People is about. It is a ....?

Management

This the breaking down, the analysis, the sequencing, the specific application, the time bound left-brain aspect of effective self-government?

Circle of Influence, accepting the responsibility to use their influence effectively

Though they may have to prioritize the use of their influence proactive people have a Circle of Concern that is at least as big as their...?

Independent

Interdependence is a choice only __________ people can make.

Independent people

Interdependence is only a choice ____________ can make.

Quadrant II

Interestingly every one of the seven habits is in...?

how

Skill is the _______ to do.

Twice. There's a mental creation or first creation and a physical or second creation, to all things.

"Begin with the end in mind" is based on the principal that all things are created?

map

A _______ is simply an explanation of certain aspects of the territory. That's exactly what a paradigm is. It is a theory an explanation or model of something else.

It's personal It's positive It's present tense It's visual It's emotional

A good affirmation has what five basic ingredients?

long term relationships

Anything less than Win / Win in an independent reality is a poor second best that will have impact on.....?

that thought is the problem.

Anytime we think the problem is out there....

the freedom to choose

Between Stimulus and Response is our greatest power.....?

social paradigms

Both the Character Ethic and the Personality Ethic are examples of ______________.

"paradigms" / "paradigm shift"

But before we can really understand the Seven Habits, we need to understand our own ________________ and to make a ______________ _____.

Empathetic Listening

But very few of us ever practice the fifth level, the highest form of listening.....?

Creator Creation Physical

Habit #1 you are the ______? Habit #2 Is the first mental ________ Habit #3 Is the 2nd creation the ________ creation

10 / 30 / 60

Communications expert estimate, in fact, that only ____ % of our communication is represented by the word we say. Another _____% is represented by our sounds, and ___% by our body language.

time, patience, skill and empathy

Creating an organizational mission statement takes?

Part One Paradigms and Principals

Inside Out Approach

motivation / want

Desire is the ____________, the _____ to do.

"private victories" of habits 1,2,&3"

Direct Control problems are solved by working on our habits. They are obviously within our Circle of Influence. These are the...

Objective. But this is not the case.

Each of us think we tend to see things as they are, that we are ________________.

"Is putting first things first"

Effective management is.....?

How to use this book.

First I would recommend that you not "see" this material as a book in the sense that it is something to read once and put on a shelf. Second I would suggest that you shift your paradigm of your own involvement in this material from the role of learner to that of teacher Take an inside-out approach, and read with the purpose in mind of sharing of discussing what you learn with someone else within 48 hours after you learn it.

knowledge, skill and desire

For our purpose, we will define a habit as the intersection of......

maps.

For our purposes, a simple way to understand paradigms is to see them as _________.

1. Notes and Checklist 2. Calendars and appointment books 3. Time Management field 4. Manage ourselves

Four Generations of Time Management

Creator Creation

Habit 1 says You are the ? Habit 2 is the first ?

principals of personal leadership / first

Habit 2 is based on ______________________________ , which means leader ship is the _____ creation.

Begin with the end in mind

Habit 2?

Habits 1 and 2

Habit 3 is the personal fruit: the practical fulfillment of Habits ___ and ____

Put first things first

Habit 3?

Think Win-Win

Habit 4?

1. Physical 2. Spiritual 3. Mental 4. Social / Emotional

Habit 7 (sharpen the saw) is renewing the four dimensions of your nature. What are they?

Personal PC / you

Habit 7 is __________ it is preserving and enhancing the greatest asset you have _________?

renewal - a regular, balanced renewal of the four basic dimensions of life. It circles and embodies all the other habits

Habit 7 is the habit of ......?

Habit #3

Habits 1 and 2 are absolutely essential and prerequisite to ________?

Personal Victories

Habits 1, 2 and 3

the "Private Victories".

Habits 1, 2 and 3 are ............?

self-mastery

Habits 1, 2, and 3 deal with ___________. They move a person from dependence to interdependence.

effectiveness / ineffectiveness

Habits are powerful factors in our lives. Because they are consistent, often unconscious patterns, they constantly daily express our character and produce our _______________ or _____________.

as the fruit of desire and ability to sacrifice what we want now for what we want eventually

Happiness can be defined, in part at least...?

First- it's principled centered Second- it's conscience directed Third- it defines your unique mission, including values and long term goals Fourth- it helps you balance your life by identifying roles Fifth- it gives greater context through weekly organizing

How is the fourth generation of self-management more advanced than the third (scheduling) in five important ways?

Quadrant I Quadrant II Quadrant III Quadrant IV

How many Quadrants are there in the management matrix?

One hour a day every day doing it - one hour for the rest of your life.

How often does Stephen Covey commend you to practice the "Daily Private Victory"?

Seek first to understand, then to be understood. This principle is the key to effective interpersonal communication.

If I were to summarize in one sentence the single most important principle I have learned in the field of interpersonal relations, it would be:??

total philosophy of human interaction.

In Habit 4 (Think Win / win) is not a technique it's a ....?

Independent will

In addition to self awareness, imagination and conscience, it is the fourth human endowment? page 156

feeling / meaning / behavior

In empathetic listening you listen for ______, for _______, and for _________.

eyes / heart

In empathetic listening you listen with your ears, but you also more importantly listen with your _______ and your _______.

First - see the problem from the other point of view Second - identify the key issues and concerns involved Third - determine what result would constitute a fully acceptable solution Fourth - identify possible new options to achieve those results

In my own work with various people and organizations seeking Win / Win solutions, I suggest they become involved in the following 4 step process.....?

Circle of Influence. That center is composed of our most basic paradigms the lens through which we see the world

In order to write a personal mission statement, we must begin at the very center of our...?

P = production PC- production capability.

In the P/PC balance P stands for? and PC stand for ?

weekly basis

In the opinion of Stephen R. Covey he recommends organizing your life on a ......?

1. Desired Results 2. Guidelines 3. Resources 4. Accountability 5. Consequences Agreements (D.G.R.A.C)

In the principal of Win / Win Agreements is the third of the five interdependent dimensions. And within the Agreements the following five elements are made very explicit. What are those elements for the Agreements?

1. Integrity 2. Maturity 3. Abundance Mentality. Character (I.M.A)

In the principal of Win / Win Character is the first of the five interdependent dimensions. And within that Character dimension there are three character traits essential to the Win / Win paradigm. What are those three?

"public victories" of Habits 4,5 & 6

Indirect Control problems are solved by changing our methods of influence. These are the ....

learn, commit, do

Moving along an upward spiral requires us to _______, ________, and _____ on a increasingly higher plane. To keep progressing we must _______, _________ and _____ and again and again.

psychological survival.

Next to physical survival the greatest need for a human being is _________________

the physical, spiritual and mental

Of the 4 dimensions of nature.... what three of them make up the "Daily Private Victory"?

" The successful person has the habit of doing things failures don't like to do. They don't like them either but their disliking is subordinated to the strength of their purpose.

One of Stephen Covey's favorite essays is " The Common Denominator of Success, written by E.M. Gray. He found it wasn't hard work, good luck, or astute human relations, though those are all important. The one factor that seemed to transcend all of them embodies habit #3

Habits.

Our Character Basically is a composite of our ________.

volunteers just as you treat customers as volunteers, because that's what they are. They volunteer the best part-their hearts and minds

PC work is treating employees as.....?

world

Paradigms are powerful because they create the lens through which we see the ______ .

Self-Centeredness

Perhaps the most common center today is the.....?

The more bound a person is by the initial perception the more powerful the "Aha!" experience is. It as though a "light was suddenly turned on.

Perhaps the most important insight to be gained from the perception demonstration is in the area of the paradigm shifting, what we might call the "Aha!" experience when someone finally "sees" the composite picture in another way.

Circle of Concern. They focus on the weakness of other people the problems in the environment and circumstances over which they have no control.

Reactive people on the other hand, focus their efforts in the....?

Habit 7 is the habit of

Renewal. It circles and embodies all the other habits.

Personal mission

Rolls and goals give structure and organized direction to your?

Habit #5

Seek first to understand.......then to be understood. Knowing how to be understood is the other half of....?

"Daily Private Victory"

Sharpening the Saw in the first three nature dimensions - the physical, the spiritual, and the mental - is a practice Stephen Covey calls........?

Manage from the left; lead from the fight (left brain - right brain)

Stephen Covey states: My own maxim of personal effectiveness is this: page 156

Organize and execute around priorities

Stephen Covey. " I am personally persuaded that the essence of the best thinking in the area of time management can be captured in a single phrase....?

September and June

Stephen R Covey and his family review the family mission statement frequently and rework goals and jobs twice a year, in ________ and ________-- the beginning of the school and the end of school-- to reflect the situation as it is to improve it to strengthen it. It renews us, it recommits us to what we believe in, what we stand for

1. Desired results 2.Guidelines (identify parameters & points out potential failures 3. Resources 4. Accountability 5. Consequences (good or bad with results)

Stewardship delegation involves clear, upfront mutual understanding and commitment regarding expectations in 5 areas.

a clear upfront mutual understanding and commitment regarding expectations.

Stewardship delegation involves...?

with trust

Stewardship means a job ____ _____? Stewardship delegation is focused on results instead of methods. It gives people a choice of method and makes them responsible for results.

Quadrant II activity.

Taking time to (H7) "Sharpen the Saw" is a definite ______________?

emotionally / intellectually

The essence of empathetic listening is not that you agree with someone, its that you fully deeply understand that person _____________ as well as _________________.

private victories precede public victories, that making and keeping promises to ourselves precedes making and keeping promises to others.Its says its futile to put personality ahead of character.

The "inside-out" approach says that........?

character, principals, upward spiral of growth

The 7 Habits become the basis of a person's __________ creating empowering center of correct _______ from which and individual can correctly solve problems, maximize opportunities, and continually learn and integrate other principals in an _______ ______ of _______.

effectiveness

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People embody many of the fundamental principals of human _______________ .

principles

The Character Ethic is based on the fundamental idea that there are ___________ that govern human effectiveness----natural laws in the human dimension that are just as real as unchanging and unarguably there as laws such as gravity are in the physical dimension

have's: I'll be happy when I have... If I only had? If I had more?

The Circle of Concern is filled with the?

be's: I can be, patient, wise, loving. It's the character focus. page 96

The Circle of Influence is filled with the?

effectiveness

The P/PC balance is the very essence of _________ . It balances the short and long term. It's the definition and paradigm of effectiveness upon which the........Seven Habits in this book are based

Always treat your employees exactly as you want them to treat your best customers.

The PC principal is to.....

Effectiveness. Becuase they are based on principals.

The Seven Habits are habits of....?

emotional bank account

The ________________________ is a metaphor that describes the amount of trust that's been built up in a relationship

upward

The being / seeing is an ____________ process-- being changing seeing, which in turn changes being and so forth as we move in an upward spiral of growth.

the challenge is not to manage time but to manage ourselves.

The emerging fourth generation that is different in kind, It recognizes that "time management" is really a misnomer .....?

yourself

The fourth generation (self management) ,manage ourselves, recognizes that the first person you need to consider in terms of effectiveness rather than efficiency is....?

priorities

The key is not to prioritize what's on your schedule but to schedule your...?

personal mission statement or philosophy or creed. It focuses on what you want to be (character) and to do (contributions & achievements) and on the values of principals upon which being and doing are based.

The most effective way I know to begin with the end in mind is to develop a?

1. Coherence 2. Balance 3. Quadrant II Focus 4. People Dimensions 5. Flexibility 6. Portability

The objective of Quadrant II is to manage our lives effectively A quadrant II organizer will need to meet 6 important criteria?

1. character 2. Relationships 3. agreements 4. structures and system 5. Process C.R.A.S.P

The principal of Win / Win is fundamental to success in all our interactions and it embraces what Five interdependent dimensions of life?

inside out

The proactive approach is to change from the....

Direct Control - problems involving our own behavior Indirect Control - problems involving other peoples behavior No Control - problems we can do nothing about such as our past situational realities

The problems we face fall in one of three areas

"P/PC Balance" This is a principle that can be easily understood by remembering Aesop's fable of the goose and the golden egg.

The seven habits are habits of effectiveness because they are based on a paradigm of effectiveness that is in harmony with a natural law a principal I call?

First - mimic content Second - rephrase the content Third - reflect the feeling Fourth - Repeat the second and third together (rephrase the content and reflect the feeling)

The skills, the tip of the iceberg of empathetic listening involve what four developmental stages?

Kuhn shows how almost every significant breakthrough in the field of scientific endeavor is first a break with tradition, with old ways of thinking, with old Paradigms

The term Paradigm shift was introduced by Thomas Kuhn in the highly influential landmark book, The Structure of Scientific Revolutions

Greek.

The word PARADIGM comes from the _______ It was originally a scientific term and is more commonly used today to mean a model, theory, perception, assumption, or frame of reference. In a more general sense, it is a way we see the world-not in terms of our visual sense of sight, but in terms of perceiving, understanding, interpreting

The United States today is the fruit of a paradigm shift. The traditional concept of government for centuries had been monarchy, the divine rights of kings.

Then a paradigm shift was developed - government of the people by the people and for the people.

1.Genetic determinism-basically says your grandparents did it to you. DNA 2. Psychic determinism- says your parents did it to you. your upbringing 3. Environmental determinism-your boss is doing it to you-or your spouse

There are actually three social maps - 3 theories of determinism widely accepted, independently or in combination, to explain the nature of man. What are they?

Gofer delegation Stewardship delegation

There are basically two kinds of delegation

Win / Win

There's almost always a third alternative, and if you work with a ____________ philosophy and really seek to understand, you usually can find a solution that will be better for everyone concerned

The 7 habits are not a set of separated or piecemeal psych-up formulas. In harmony with the natural laws of growth, they provide an incremental, sequential, highly integrated approach to the development of personal and interpersonal effectiveness.

They move us progressively on a Maturity Continuum from Dependence to Independence to Interdependence

Almost all the literature in the first 150 years (U.S. 1776) or focused on what could be called the character ethic-as the foundation of success

Things like integrity, humility,fidelity, tempermant, courage, justice, patience, industry, modesty and the Golden Rule

but as we are-or as we are conditioned to see it

We see the world, not as it is,........?

Independence

We should remember that Interdependence can only be built on the foundation of true...?

Spouse Centeredness Family Centeredness Money Centeredness Work Centeredness Possession Centeredness Pleasure Centeredness Friend/Enemy Centeredness Church Centeredness Self-Centeredness

What are centers or core paradigms people typically have?

Self awareness, imagination, conscience, independent will

What are the 4 human endowments?

1. Understanding the Individual 2. Attending to the little things 3. Keeping Commitments 4. Clarifying Expectations 5. Showing Personal Integrity 6. Apologizing Sincerely

What are the 6 major deposits that build the emotional bank account ?

Win / Win Win / Lose Lose / Win Lose / Lose Win Win / Win or No Deal

What are the 6 paradigms of human interaction...? (Habit #4 think win/win)

physical, financial, and human

What are the three kind of assets?

imagination, conscience

What are the two unique human endowments that enable us to practice Habit #2?

1. We can "make a promise" and keep it. 2. Or we can "set a goal" and work to achieve it.

What are two ways to put ourselves in control of our lives immediately?

Exercise and Nature Value Clarification & Commitment, Study, Meditation Reading, Visualizing, Planning, Writing Service, Empathy, Synergy, Intrinsic Security

What do each of the four dimensions of nature involve? Physical - ? Spiritual - ? Mental - ? Social / Emotional - ?

Security, Guidance, Wisdom, & Power security, guidance, wisdom, and power

What ever is at the center of our life will be the source of our...? These 4 factors, _________, ___________, ____________, and ____________ are interdependent.

Be Proactive

What is Habit 1 titled?

Simply defined it means the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

What is synergy?

"Middle" in the sense does not mean compromise; it means higher, like the apex of the triangle. Buddhism /*\ apex of triangle

What is the "middle way"

Dependence - paradigm of others do it for you Independence - paradigm of I can do it my self Interdependence is the paradigm we can do it together

What is the Maturity Continuum?

It is Habit #5. Seek first to understand then to be understood. Even thought Think Win / Win is the 4th Habit you need to apply Habit #5 Seek fist to understand, in order to begin the process of Win /Win.

What is the first step in the process of Win / Win?

Empathetic listening

What is the key to making deposits in the emotional bank account?

Self awareness: it enables us to stand apart and examine even the way we "see" ourselves-our self-paradigm

What is the most fundamental paradigm of effectiveness?

"Inside-out"

What means to start first with self; even more fundamentally, to start with the most inside part of self-with your paradigms, your character, and your motives?

Understand

When I say empathetic listening, I mean listening with the intent to____________

1. Ignoring 2. Pretending 3. Selective listening 4. Attentive Listening

When another person speaks, we're usually listening at one of four levels. What are they?

describe ourselves our perceptions, our paradigms.

When we open our mouths to describe what we see, we in effect........?

synergistic

When you see only two alternatives - yours and the "wrong one" you can look for a ____________ third alternative,

In the last analysis what we are communicates far more eloquently than anything we say or do. We all know it. There are people we trust absolutely because we know their character.

Whether their eloquent or not, whether they have the human relations techniques or not we trust them and we work successfully with them

first things, first

While leadership decides what _________ _________ are, it is management that puts them ________, day by day, moment by moment. Management is discipline carrying it out.

1. Family member 2. Friend 3. Co worker 4. From church or community organization

Who are the 4 speakers in the funeral example: There are four speakers.

Albert Einstein observed

Who created this quote......." The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them" ?

Self-awareness Imagination Conscience Independent will

Within the freedom to choose are 4 endowments that make us uniquely human. what are they?

1.Self-awareness 2.Imagination-the ability to create minds beyond our present reality 3. Conscience-a deep inner awareness of right and wrong 4. Independent will- the ability to act based on self-awareness, free of all other influences

Within the freedom to choose are the 4 endowments that make us uniquely human?

commitment.

Without involvement there is no.......?

process

You can only acchieve Win / Win solutions with Win / Win ____________?

Habit #5

____________ is powerful because it is right in the middle of your circle of influence