Ch.7: Love and Romantic Relationships

How do we select our mates? How does gender, race, and ethnicity influence mate selection?

1. Inequality: rich with the rich, poor with the poor creates strong lines of wealth and poverty 2. Inclusion vs. exclusion: members of different groups tend to stay within their group 3. Family dynamics: how families work together is partly the result of how couples choose each other and how those choices affect their relationships throughout adulthood Homophily is used to describe the principle by which similar people have more of a given kind of contact than dissimilar people

What is love?

A deep affection and concern for another, with whom one feels a strong emotional bond

What are cultural beliefs about love and romance?

4 qualities of the romantic ideal: 1. Love is unambiguous and clear, as in "love at first sight" 2. Love is unique, so there is "one true love" 3. Individuals seek both to prove and to demonstrate their true character by overcoming obstacles in the quest for love 4. Love is permanent There are two cultures of love in the U.S.: Utilitarian love: practical, rational dedication of one person to another based on shared understanding and emotional commitment; considering the pros and cons and looking within oneself to identify what they want from a relationship and work on them; communication Romantic love: more spontaneous, The shift from romantic love to utilitarian love parallels rational science over irrational religion

How do romantic relationships vary for people based on age, sexuality, and parental status?

Same gender relationships are complicated by negative social pressures; they do not have relationship scripts resulting in "relational ambiguity"; absence of formal recognition Students often socialize in mixed-gender groups; the majority of college students expect men to take the lead in formal date situations, especially first dates; men in college are more likely to have a sexual goal than women; the relative scarcity of men increases their bargaining power in the dating scene Older people are more active in online dating, especially those who are divorced Gays and Lesbians are more likely to meet their partner online than at random

What does dating look like? How is it different than in the past?

The dating system has become much less dominant In the past, dating was seen as the "traditional" more formal system of getting to marriage The concept of dating now is closer to the historical idea of going steady, which implied only being with one person romantically Dating is more of a private matter of decision now even though dates take place in public settings Unlike courtship, dating usually takes place in the market arena, often involving personal spending and commercial consumption; erodes family influence and enhances the power of the market in the process of forming families; the consumption aspect of dating enhances the public nature of the couple's commitment The hookup culture Connecting online