Funny Riddles 😂

You do not see me But people now mean a being, I kill the living But sometimes The living kills me What and I?

A germ

I have keys, but no locks and space, and no rooms. You can enter, but you can't go outside. What am I?

A keyboard

I might be tiny or big on a ceiling but I can shine and illuminate everyone's home at night. What am I?

A light bulb

I have cities, but no houses. I have mountains, but no trees. I have water, but no fish. What am I?

A map

Kings and lords and christians raised themSince they stand for higher powersYet few of them would stand, I'm certain,if women ruled this world of ours

A tower

What did addition say to the subtraction when they found each other on Facebook?

Add me

Kings and queens may cling to powerand the jester's got his callBut, as you may all discover,the common one outranks them all

Ane ace

Alive without breath,As cold as death,Clad in mail never clinking,Never thirsty, ever drinking

Fish

I have four legs but no tail. Usually I am heard only at night. What am I?

Frog

I drive men madFor love of me,Easily beaten,Never free.

Gold

There is one word that stands the test of time and holds fast to the center of everything. Though everyone will try at least once in their life to move around this word, but in

Gravity

I go in hard.I come out soft.You blow me hard.What am I?

Gum

If you break meI do not stop working,If you touch meI may be snared,If you lose meNothing will matter.

Heart

Old Mother Twitchet had one eyeand a long tail that she let fly.And every time she went through a gap,she left some tail in the trap

Needle

Each morning I appearTo lie at your feet,All day I will followNo matter how fast you run,Yet I nearly perishIn the midday sun

Shadow

I never was, am always to be. No one ever saw me, nor ever will. And yet I am the confidence of all, To live and breath on this terrestrial ball. What am I?

Tomorrow

Forwards I'm heavy but, backwards I'm not what am I?

Ton

Three lives have I.Gentle enough to soothe the skin,Light enough to caress the sky,Hard enough to crack rocks.

Water

There was a green house. Inside the green house there was a white house. Inside the white house there was a red house. Inside the red house there were lots of babies.

Watermelon

What is it that after you take away the whole, some still remains?

Wholesome

All about, but cannot be seen,Can be captured, cannot be held,No throat, but can be heard.

Wind

When young, I am sweet in the sun.When middle-aged, I make you gray.When old, I am valued more than ever

Wine

What gets wetter the more it dries.

towel

I am always hungry,I must always be fed,The finger I touch,Will soon turn red

Fire

What good virtue put you on the verge of death

patience

Say my name and I disappear. What am I?

silence

liz was 15, and it was her birthday. She drove to her friends house. It took 22 min to get there. But if she took a short cut, she could get there in 12 min. how old is liz?

16, it was her birthday

What question can you never honestly answer yes to?

Are you a wake

I can be long, or I can be short.I can be grown, and I can be bought.I can be painted, or left bare.I can be round, or square.What am I?

Fingernail

Remove six letters from this sequence to reveal a familiar English word. BSAINXLEATNTEARS

Banana

Birds and animals have countless battles with countless injuries but they won't stay away for longbecause they love the fight

Baseball

We are apples that you can buy at the store but you can't eat me, why not?

Because I am Apple products (iPhone, Apple computer, etc.)

I am seen in the waterIf seen in the sky,I am in the rainbow,A jay's feather,And lapis lazuli.

Blue

I'm lighter than air but a million men can't lift me. What am I?

Bubble

Little Miss EticoteIn her white petticoatAnd her red noseThe longer she standsThe shorter she grows

Candle

I can be white or dark, I am sweet and sometimes bitter and you see me on a cupcake or in a cookie. What am I?

Chocolate

As you look upon my face you won't see thirteen any place.

Clock

You throw away the outside and cook the inside. Then you eat the outside and throw away the inside. What did you eat?

Corn

You eat through away the outside and eat the inside, you eat the outside and through away the inside. What FOOD am I?

Corn. You through away the husk and eat the corn, you eat the corn and trough away the cob.

The more you have of it, the less you see. What is it?

Dark

What begins and has no end? What is the ending of all that begins?

Death

What are the next three letters in this combination? OTTFFSS

E N T (Each letter represents the first letter in the written numbers: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, etc.). E N T (Each letter represents the first letter in the written numbers: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, etc.).

A box without hinges, lock or key, yet golden treasure lies within. What is it?

Egg

I am known to be shorter than all my pals and every 4 years in the calendar I change just a bit and throw everyone off. What am I?

February

I know a word of letters three. Add two, and fewer there will be

Few

It cannot be seen, it weighs nothing, but when put into a barrel, it makes it lighter. What is it?

Hole

Imagine you are a bus drive and at the first stop 10 people get on. At the next stop 14 people get on and 4 people get off the bus. Did the math? Okay at the third stop 12 people get on and 2 people leave. Got it? Okay so here is the question, how old is the bus driver?

How old are you? Now read the first sentence again. that's the answer How old are you?

Lighter than whatI am made of,More of me is hiddenThan is seen

Iceberg

Glittering pointsThat downward thrust,Sparkling spearsThat never rust.

Icicle

Which word in the dictionary is always spelled incorrectly

Incorrectly

I am, in truth, a yellow forkFrom tables in the skyBy inadvertent fingers droppedThe awful cutlery.Of mansions never quite disclosed

Lighting

If you drop me I'm sure to crack but give me a smile and I'll always smile back

Mirror

What has roots that nobody sees,Is taller than trees,Up, up it goes,Yet it never grows?

Mountains

At the sound of me, men may dream Or stamp their feetAt the sound of me, women may laugh Or sometimes weep

Music

It is greater than god and more evil than the devil. The poor have it, the rich need it and if you eat it you'll die. What is it?

Nothing

You can slice and dice me, peel and chop me, cut me, cook me and I might make you cry. What am I?

Onion

I live in waterIf you cut my head I'm at your door,If you cut my tail I'm fruit,If you cut both I'm with youWhat am I?

Pearl

What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?

Penny

I am a box that holds keys without locks, yet they can unlock your soul. What am I?

Piano

My first is twice in apple but not once in tart. My second is in liver but not in heart. My third is in giant and also in ghost. Whole I'm best when I am roast. What am I?

Pig

What makes a loud noise when changing its jacket, becomes larger but weighs less?

Popcorn

It's red, blue, purple and green, no one can reach it, not even the queen. What is it?

Rainbow

You saw me where I never was and where I could not be. And yet within that very place, my face you often see. What am I?

Reflection

What always runs but never walks, often murmurs, never talks, has a bed but never sleeps, has a mouth but never eats?

River

I build up castles.I tear down mountains.I make some men blind,I help others to see.What am I?

Sand

A woman shoots her husband, then holds him underwater for five minutes. Next, she hangs him. Right after, they enjoy a lovely dinner. Explain.

She took a picture of him and developed it in her dark room.

What has a neck and no head, two arms but no hands?

Shirt

A mile from end to end, yet as close to as a friend. A precious commodity, freely given. Seen on the dead and on the living. Found on the rich, poor, short and tall, but shared among

Smile

I give you a group of three. One is sitting down, and will never get up. The second eats as much as is given to him, yet is always hungry. The third goes away and never returns.

Smoke

When you went into the woods you got me.You hated me yet you wanted to find me.You went home with me cause you couldn't find me

Splinter

I'm full of holes, yet I'm full of water. What am I?

Spongepop

At night they come without being fetched. By day they are lost without being stolen. What are they?

Stars

Ripped from my mother's womb,Beaten and burned,I become a blood thirsty killer.What am I?

Sword

What starts with a T, ends with a T, and has "T" in it?

Teapot

What is seen in the middle of March and April that can't be seen at the beginning or end of either month?

The letter "R"

I go up and I go down, I am blazing and hot. If you look right at me, your eyes will wish you had not. What am I?

The sun

How many letters are in the alphabet?

There are 11 letters in "the alphabet"

. Their mothers name is what. Okay, look at the last sentence. Now look at the punctuation, do you see anything? There is a period. A period ether means a statement or a command. In this sentence though it means a statement.

There are 3 kittens. Their names are Spot, Strip, and Rocky. What is their mothers name.

How did Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune make up the solar system?

They plan-et

Soft and fragile is my skinI get my growth in mudI'm dangerous as much as prettyFor if not careful, I draw blood.

Thorn

Until I am measuredI am not known,Yet how you miss me When I have flown.

Time

I am always there for you, following you around like my best friend, copying everything you do, and lot of times you see me on the ground. What am I?

Your shadow

Two words is my answer. In order to keep me, you have to give me. What am I?

Yourword

I am a very hot ball up in the sky. I twinkle and shine, look small and bright? What am I?

a star

You measure my life in hours and I serve you by expiring. I'm quick when I'm thin and I'm slow when I'm fat. The wind is my enemy You measure my life in hours and I serve you by expiring. I'm quick when I'm thin and I'm slow when I'm fat. The wind is my enemy

candle

It walks on four legs in the morning, two legs at noon and three legs in the evening. What is it?

man

The more you take, the more you leave behind

footsteps

How far will a blind dog walk into a forest?

halfway

Someone broke into Mr. Greens house and stole his money and ran sacked his house. the thief left this note 4th of March 7th of October 4th of April 6th of August There are 3 suspects. John Platen, his soon to be son in law with lots of debt. Cris Chi, the writer Mr. Green fired last Tuesday. And Mrs. Laura his house keeper who kept saying she needed to be payed more. Can you figure out who is the thief?

look at 4th of March now cost four of the 5 letters in the word March. you count up to C. Do the same to the rest and you come out with Cris.