mc210
Ending the story- the term kicker can have two meanings. it can refer to an additional line set above the main headline of a story that helps draw attention to the story or it can refer to the ending of the story itself. ending the story well is important because it helps to nail down the central point of the story and can leave a lasting impression in readers minds. sometimes the kicker, or ending of the story, is just as important as the lead.
"want to write well? open with a punch, close with a kick." this advice, from matthew stibbe, freelance journalist, CEO of articulate and turbine, serves journalists well.
disadvantages to inverted pyramid style:
-because the lead summaries facts that later paragraphs discuss in greater detail, some of those facts may be repeated in the body -a story the follows the inverted pyramid rarely contains any surprises for readers; the lead immediately reveals the major facts -the inverted pyramid style evolved when newspapers were readers first source for breaking news; now radio, television and the internet fill that role -readers with less that a high school education cannot easily understand stories written in this style -the inverted pyramid locks reporters into a formula and discourages them from trying new styles (page 182 illustration)
The reporters guide:
1. be specific rather than vague and abstract
explain the unfamiliar- reporters should avoid words that are not used in everyday conversation. when an unfamiliar word is necessary, journalists myst immediately define it. three techniques to explain the unfamiliar:
1. place a brief explanation in parentheses: The law would ban accessory structures (sheds, pool houses and unattached garages) in new subdivisions
9. if your story discusses several major subtopics, mention all the major subtopics in your story's opening paragraphs so your readers know what to expect.
10. if you use a list, make sure each item is in parallel form
10. use relatively simple sentences and avoid beginning leads with a long phrase or clause.
11. use strong, active and descriptive verbs rather than passive ones.
11. provide transitions to lead your readers from one sentence or paragraph to another smoothly and logically.
12. make your transitional sentences specific; say something intriguing to sustain reader's interest in the topic.
12. avoid using unfamiliar names. nay names that require lengthy identification should be reported in a later paragraph.
13. attribute any quotation or statement of opinion appearing in the lead.
13. if you use a question as a transition, make it clear, short and simple.
14. avoid generalities that have to be explained in a later sentence or paragraph. be specific.
14. localize the lead, and emphasize the latest developments, preferably what happened today or yesterday.
15. eliminate statements of opinion, including one-word labels such as "interesting" and "alert"
15. resist the temptation to end your story with a summary, conclusion or opinion.
16. after finishing your story, critically edit an rewrite it
16. remember the readers. write a lead that is clear, concise and interesting and that emphasizes the details most likely to affect and interest readers.
17. read the lead aloud to be certain that it is clear, concise and easy to understand.
(the writing coach) 1. the most natural lace to put the day is immediately after the verb or the main clause. thus, you follow the basic formula for whiting a lead, especially in a hard news story: who, what, time, day or date and place. the robber was killed Friday at the convenience store.
2. avoid placing the time element so it appears that its the object of a transitive verb. if this occurs, use "on" before the time element. (the city council postponed thursday a resolution....to ...the city council postponed on thursday a resolution...)
reporters guide: 1. place the most important details in your lead.
2. throughout the story, emphasize the details most likely to interest and affect your readers.
2. avoid stating the obvious or the negative
3. emphasize the story's most unusual or unexpected developments.
2. place the explanation immediately after the unfamiliar name or term, setting ir off with a color, comma or dash- amy and ralph haggis of carlton drive filed for bankruptcy under chapter 13, which allows them to repay their creditors in monthly installments over a there-year period. / about 800 foreign students at the university are on F-1 student visas- which means that they are allowed to stay in the united states only until they complete their degrees.
3. place the explanation in the next sentence- the major banks raised their prime rate to 12.5 percent. the prime rate is the interest rate banks charge their best customers.
3. use "on" before the principal verb if it seems awkward after the verb or main clause. (the embassy friday expelled several...put on in front of friday)
4. and use "on" to avoid an awkward juxtaposition of the day and a proper name. (police told smith tuesday...instead put on in front of tuesday)
3. include details from your observations to create a picture your readers can visualize.
4. in the story second paragraph, continue to discuss the topic initiated in your lead.
4. emphasize the story's most interesting and important developments.
5. emphasize the story's magnitude and its impact on its participants and readers.
5. do not leapfrog. if your lead mentions an individual, and your second paragraph begins with a name, provide a transition that makes it clear you mean the same person.
6. make your sentences clear, concise and to the point. (avoid passive verbs. also, use the normal word order of subject, verb, direct object)
5. hart recommends braking the tradition of always putting the day or time element at the beginning of the sentence. however, he adds that its occasionally the best place
6. place your time element in a different sentence. don't think that the time element must be in the lead, especially when you're writing a profile or issue, trend or feature story. in many cases, the time element can be effectively delayed for later paragraphs.
6. use complete sentences, the proper tense and all the necessary articles- a, an and the.
7. be concise. if a lead exceeds three typed lines, examine it for wordiness, repetition or unnecessary details and retire it to eliminate the problems.
7. vary your sentence structure.
8. avoid overloading your sentences
8. avoid writing a label lead that reports the story topic but not what was said or done about it.
9. begin leads with the news- the main point of the story- not the attribution or the time and place the events occurred.
Emphasize the news: decide which facts are most interesting and important, then write a lead that emphasizes these facts regardless of whether they occurred first, last or in the middle of a sequence of events.
Avoid "agenda" leads. An opening paragraph that places too much emphasis on the time and place at which a story occurred is called an "agenda" lead.
Avoid "label"leads. Label leads mention a topic but fail to reveal what was said or done about that topic. leads should report the substance of a story, not just its topic.
Avoid lists. dull. if a list must be used in a lead, place an explanation before it, never after it.
the best advice is that you read your sentence out loud or to another person to ensure that the time element doesn't sound or seem awkward, this will ensure that your mondays, tuesdays and so on are in their proper place today.
Be Concise: the concise style of writing found in newspapers makes it easy for the public to read and understand leads but difficult for reporters to write them.
Localize and Update: reporters locally their leads whenever possible by emphasizing their communities' involvement in stories.
Be objective and attribute opinions: the lead of a news story, like the rest of the story, must be objective. reporters are expected to gather and convey to their readers facts, not commentary, interpretation or advocacy. Although reporters cannot express their own opinions in stories, they often include the opinions of people involved in the news. A lead containing a statement of opinion must be attributed so readers clearly understand the opinion is not the reporter's.
Strive for simplicity; every lead should be clear, simple and to the point.
Begin with the news: avoid beginning a lead with the attribution. place an attribution at the beginning of a lead only when it is unusual, significant or deserving of that emphasis. (names)
ironic leads- closely related to shockers are leads the present a startling or ironic contrast.
Direct-address leads- reporters occasionally use a form of direct address, speaking directly to their readers.
Complex stories- stories that contain several major subtopics may be too complex to summarize in a brief lead.
How to find the right endings to stories- reporters sometimes ask this question about their stories. how do you know when you have a good ending?
narrative style can be a refreshing change from the inverted pyramid, but it is not appropriate for all stories. stories about breaking news events, speeches or most government meetings, for instance, often make more sense to readers when told in traditional inverted-pyramid fashion. narrative touches, such as dialogue and colorful descriptions are helpful.
Transitions- help stories move from one fact to the next in a smooth, logical order. again, think of a story as a train. the engine is the lead, and each car that follows is a paragraph. the couplings that hold the cars together are transitions. reporters introduce ideas by relating them to ideas reported earlier in a story. often, the natural progression of thought, or sequence of facts and action, is adequate. or reporters may repeat a key name or pronoun.
leads that hold back details so the reporter can get to the central point of the article more quickly are called "blind leads"
a blind lead does not hide the central point of the story, only information that the reader does not need immediately.
avoid leapfrogging- reporters often refer to an individual in their lead and begin their second paragraph with a name. however, many reporters fail to say clearly that the individual, referred to in their lead is the person named in their second paragraph. readers are forced to guess. they will usually guess right- but not always.
a man rammed his car into his wife car, then shot her in the arm and leg before bystanders tackled him, police said./ police expressed gratitude to the bystanders who helped bring Felipe M. Santos, 53, or Allentown into custody Monday. (add 'bring the man suspected of the attack' before the name)
summary leads are more common that alternative leads, and probably easier to write. summary leads get right to the central point of the story in order to be concise
alternative leads may linger over one aspect of the story before getting to the central point. good reporters can write many kinds of leads, choosing an appropriate one for each story.
avoid exaggeration. never exaggerate in a lead.
avoid misleading readers. every lead must be accurate and truthful.
use strong, active verbs. they capture the drama and emotion of a news event and help the reader understand the impact of the story.
avoid passive-voice constructions, which combine the past participle of a verb with some form of the verb "to be"
avoid stating the obvious or emphasizing routine procedures in leads. for a story about a crime, do not begin by reporting police "were called to the scene" or ambulances "rushed" the victims to a hospital "for treatments of their injuries." this problem is particularly common on sports pages, where many leads have become cliches. news stories that say most coaches and players express optimism at the beginning of a season report the obvious: the coaches and players want to win most of their games.
avoid the negative. report what happened, not what failed to happen or what does not exist.
Be specific. good leads contain interesting details and are so specific that readers can visualize the events they describe.
avoid using worn out cliches (a lazy way of summarizing a story). avoid iffy leads that say one thing that may happen if another happens.
Stress the Unusual: a lead about a board of education meeting or other governmental agency should not report "the board met at 8 p.m. at a local school and began its meeting with the Pledge of Allegiance. those facts ar routine and not newsworthy. most school boards meet every couple of weeks, usually at the same time and place, and many begin their meetings with the pledge. leads should emphasize the unique- the action that follows those routine formalities.
bank robberies are so common in big cities that newspapers normally devote only a few paragraphs to them. yet a robbery at the burlington national bank in columbus, ohio became a front-page story, published by newspapers throughout the U.S.
buried or delayed leads: a buried lead is the most common type of alternative lead. some reporters call it a delayed lead.
begins with an interesting example or anecdote that sets a story's theme. then a nut graf- perhaps the third or fourth paragraph- summarizes the story and provides a transition to the body. the nut graf states the central point of the story and moves it from a single example or anecdote to the general issue or problem. like a traditional lead, it summarizes the topic. in addition, it may explain why the topic is important.
the importance of examples- examples make stories more interesting, personalize them and help audience members understand them more easily.
examples are especially important in stories about abstract issues. sometimes numbers help put those issues into perspective.
a story written in narrative style can still lead with the news- the most important part of the story- but then quickly switch to using chronology, flashbacks, dialogue and other storytelling techniques. or the stories can employ a strictly chronological organization, ending with the most recent, and perhaps most newsworthy, information.
generally, such stories have a beginning, a middle and an end, each of relatively equal importance. it is more difficult to cut the final paragraphs of narrative stories than those of stories written in the inverted pyramid style.
gary provost, author of "1000 ways to improve your writing" offers the advice I've heard the most: look at the last sentence and ask yourself, what does the reader lose if i cross it out? if the answer is nothing, or i don't know, cross it out. do the same thing with the next to last sentence, and so forth. when you get to the sentence that you must have, read it out loud. is it a good closing sentence? does it sound final? is it pleasant to the ear? does it leave the reader in the mood you intend? if so, you are done. if not, rewrite it so that it does. then stop writing.
i suggest you end with a quite or phrase that leaves an impression on a reader. ask yourself, someone who sits near you or an editor if your ending solves a problem, stirs an emotion (for example, it take the reader back to a significant moment in a persons life) or it make a point about an issue. if it didm then the ending is appropriate. so strive for powerful endings, and, if you're an editor, don't automatically whack the ones with that power.
A central point for a news story is a one- or two-sentence summary of what the story is about and why it is newsworthy.
it is a statement of the topic, and more.several stories may have the same topic, but the central point of each of those stories should be unique
Every well-written news story contains a clear statement of its central point
it may be in the first paragraph, called the "lead." or it may be in a later paragraph, called a nut graf, that follows an anecdote, describes a scene or uses some other storytelling device to entice the reader into the story. by including the central point, writers clearly tell readers what they will learn from reading the entire story
before reporters can write effective leads, however, they must learn to recognize what is news. after selecting the most newsworthy facts, reporters must summarize those facts in sharp, clear sentences, giving a simple, straightforward account of what happened.
leads that fail to emphasize the news are sometimes described as burying the news.
the story shifts from the news- the lack of adequate blood supplies- to the organizations purpose. yet that purpose has not changed since the red cross was established. thus, the second paragraph says nothing new, nothing likely to retain reader's interest in the story. fortunately, the problem is easy to correct:
local red cross officials expressed alarm wednesday that blood supplies are dangerously low heading into the long holiday weekend / restocking those supplies will require a 50 percent increase in blood donations over the next three days, said nancy cross, executive director of the froward county chapter of the american red cross. / "holiday periods are often a problem because people are traveling or have other plans and don't think about the need for blood," cross said. "but the holiday period is also a busy time for emergency rooms and trauma centers, which increases the demand for blood."
background- too much, too soon. avoid devoting the entire second paragraph to background information. the second paragraph in the following story is dull because it emphasizes routine, insignificant details
local red cross officials expressed alarm wednesday that blood supplies are dangerously low prior to the beginning of the long holiday weekend. / nancy cross, executive director of the froward county chapter of the american red cross, said the red cross strives to maintain an adequate blood supply for emergency situations. "the role od the red cross since it was founded is to help people during times of need," she said. (next card)
a "catchall Graf" usually follows the blind lead to identify sources and answers questions created by the lead.
missing details can be placed in subsequent paragraphs.
continue with the news: -the mayor and city council agreed monday night to freeze wages and make city workers pay more for benefit in an effort to close a budget deficit that is now larger than officials expected/ mayor sarbrina datolli, who has been a lifelong resident of the city, is in her fourth term as mayor. she has sen many ups and downs over her years as mayor, but hopes the city can overcome its problems. revise by taking out area in commas in second paragraph and add "said the wage freeze and other measures are needed to prevent layoffs off city employees, cuts in programs and more drastic fiscal surgery to balance the city budget"
names names- dull dull; reporters sometimes place too much emphasis on their sources' identities. as a result, their second paragraphs fail to convey any information of interest to readers. note how the following example can be revised to emphasize the news- what the source said, saw or did, not who he is.
Narrative style- a narrative has two components; a story and a storyteller.
observation does not mean reporters are free to interject their opinions into a story
reporters use two-sentence leads only when the need to do so is compelling.
often, the second sentence emphasizes an interesting or usual fact of secondary importance other times, the second sentence is necessary because it is impossible to summarize all the necessary information about a complex topic in a single sentence. although leads can be too long, they cannot be too short.
break the rules. reporters who use their imagination and try something different sometimes can report the facts more clearly than the competition.
remember your readers. leads must be clear and interesting to attract and keep readers.
reporters always review their notes and other materials they have gathered before they start writing
reviewing assures reporters they have identified the most newsworthy central point and have the information they need to develop it. (victim and injuries, police identify suspect, witnesses' descriptions of robber)
descriptive leads- other leads begin with descriptive details that paint a picture for the reader before moving gradually into the action. the description should be colorful and interesting so that it arouses readers interest. the description should also help summarize the story.
shockers- leads with a twist: reporters like "shockers"; startling leads that immediately capture the attention of readers.
using questions- questions can make effective leads. some editors, though, prohibit question leads because they believe news stories should answer questions, not ask them.
suspenseful leads- some reporters write leads to create suspense, arouse readers' curiosity or raise a question in their minds.
few readers in large cities know the ordinary citizens involved in news stories, so the names of those people- the who- rarely appear in leads
the exact time and place at which a story occurred may also be unimportant. when writers try to answer all these questions in one paragraph, they create complicated and confusing leads.
the need to be fair- regardless of how a story is organized, it myst be balanced, fair and accurate.
the final step- edit your story. after finishing your story, edit it ruthlessly.
-students are angry about the board of trustees' decision -students gathered in the administration building lobby waving sings protesting the board of trustees' decision.
the first sentence presents an opinion. without using attribution it says the students are angry at the boards decision. the reader does not know whether the writer is reporting a fact or his/her opinion. the second sentence, however, shows the students negative behavior in response to the boards decision.
The hourglass style story structure begins with a summary lead and inverted pyramid and then turns into a chronology or sequence of events. (inverted pyramid at top, the turn in the middle, chronological conclusion at the bottom)
the hourglass story has three parts: an inverted pyramid top that summarizes the most newsworthy information, a turn, or pivot, paragraph and a narrative.
some problems with sentence structure arise because beginners confuse a story's lead with its headline.
the lead is the first paragraph of a news story. the headline is a brief summary that appears in larger type above the story. to save space, editors use only a few key words in each headline. however, that style of writing is not appropriate for leads.
Emphasize the magnitude of the story. if a story is important, reporters emphasize its magnitude in the lead.
the number of people killed, injured and left homeless; the dollar cost of the damage to buildings or other objects; reporters may emphasize the amount of rain or snow.
inverted pyramid style- these stories arrange the information in descending order of importance or newsworthiness. the lead states the most newsworthy, important or striking information and establishes the central point for the rest of the story.
the second paragraph, and sometimes others, provides details that amplify the lead. subsequent paragraphs add less important details or introduce subordinate topics. each paragraph presents additional information; names, descriptions, quotations, conflicting viewpoints, explanations and background data.
organizing the information- if two cars collide and several people are injured, an inverted pyramid story about the accident might contain a sequence of paragraphs similar to those outlined in page 182 illustration
the second paragraph- the second paragraph in a news story is almost as important as the lead, and almost as difficult to write. like the lead, the second paragraph should emphasize the news. in addition, the second paragraph should provide a smooth, logical transition from the lead to the following paragraphs
think of writing a news story as driving a train along a track. the rails are the story's central point and give the story direction. the railroad ties- who, what, when, where, why and how- provide a foundation. the trains engine is the lead; it myst be powerful enough to pull the rest of the story. like the whistle of the engine, a story's lead myst capture the readers attention. each car that follows the lead represents a paragraph containing information and providing structure. the cars can be arranged in whatever sequence- from most important to least or chronically-
the train is strengthened when research, verification, multiple sources, quotes, anecdotes and descriptions fill the cars. the amount of information needed to complete the story determines the number of cars in the train. holding the train cars together are couplings, which represent the transitions between paragraphs of information. without strong transitions, the paragraphs disconnect from one another.
reporters who fail to identify a central point or who use sight of that central point risk writing stories that are incoherent and incomplete
they go through their notes again to decide what information belongs where. they use colored pens, markers or highlighters. they omit information that does not fit in any of the sections.
one of the keys to their success is organizing information.
they spend months gathering documents and conducting interviews, all of which are filed by topic or name of individual, agency or corporation. then they read the material several times because important issues and ideas often become clear only after time. once they have an outline of the story's major sections, they start drafting it section by section. finally, they polish sections and spend most of their time working on leads and transitions between sections.
the second part of the focus story is a nut graf, which can actually be two or three paragraphs, stating the central point of the story and how the lead illustrates that point.
third part is the body, which develops the central point in detail.
The focus style- this has been used for years by the wall street journal. its front page news feature stories usually employ this format. many other newspapers and their reporters have adopted the focus style as well. it tries to incorporate storytelling techniques in news writing.
unlike the hourglass, the focus story begins with a lead that focuses on a spedovic individual, situation or anecdote and uses that to illy start a larger problem. it has four parts, the first is the lead which unlike the lead for an inverted pyramid story, may run three or more paragraphs.
multi paragraph leads: other news writers think of a lead as a unit of thought. their summary leads consist of two or three paragraphs that flow into each other as if they were one.
using quotations; reporters usually avoid using quotations in leads.
the questions to ask for a news story:
who, what, when, where, why, how. (the lead is not the place to answer all of them)
other transitional devices include words that can indicate time, addition, causation, comparison or contrast.
word phrases also can serve as transitional devices as can sentences and questions.
no one sits down and whites great stories
writers myst plan their work