CH 13

Explain the scripts involved in ending close, pre-marital relationships as identified by Baxter (1984). Identify which themes were most prevalent.

Baxter (1984) analyzed break-up trajectories: 150 narratives describing people's break-ups Common themes: Direct vs. indirect Other-oriented vs. self-oriented Gradual vs. sudden onset of discontent Individual vs. shared desire to end relationships Rapid vs. protracted attempts to end relationship before final dissolution Presence or absences of repair attempts Persevering indirectness (about 1/3 of breakups) Discontent developed gradually (~75%) Only one partner wanted to end the relationship (~66%) Repeated efforts to end relationship No attempts to repair

Why divorce rate has increased: COHABITATION

Casual cohabitation decreases commitment to marriage

Why divorce rate has increased: FAMILY HISTORY OF DIVORCE

Children of divorce are more likely to divorce.

Why divorce rate has increased: PERCEPTIONS OF DIVORCE

Divorce is more socially acceptable and easier (legally) to obtain.

The PAIR project DISILLUSIONMENT PROJECT

Early views of relationships are unrealistically positive Problems emerge once couples start seeing relationship more accurately.

Why divorce rate has increased: DIVORCED FRIENDS

Having a friend or family member who divorces increases your likelihood of divorce by 75%.

Describe the Karney and Bradbury's model of marriage instability with special emphasis to the interplay between the enduring vulnerabilities people bring to relationships and the stressors they are likely to experience over the course of a relationship

Karney & Bradbury's Vulnerability-Stress-Adaptation model: Enduring Vulnerabilities: Personal liabilities or weaknesses with which people bring into their marriages. Adaptive Processes: Techniques with which partners try to cope with stress Stressful Events: Difficulties people encounter.

Explain the three key aspects of Levinger's model of divorce highlighting the role that real and perceived barriers have on divorce.

Levinger's model of divorce: Similar to interdependence model, proposes 3 factors that influence breakups. Attraction: the desire to remain in a partnership is dependent on rewards and costs. Alternatives: alternatives increase the appeal of leaving one's current partner. Barriers: social pressures, religious constraints and financial costs that make it hard to leave. Barriers are often psychological. May not deter partners from separating if they are genuinely miserable.

Evaluate the contemporary U.S. marital divorce rate with the rate in the second half of the twentieth century, contemporary divorce rates in other countries, and dissolution rates for other types of relationships.

Likelihood of divorce in the U.S. is about 50%. About ⅔ of people make it to their 10th anniversary and less than ½ will make it to their 21st anniversary. Average age of first divorce is 31.8 for men and 29.4 for women. Only 49% of adults in the U.S. are currently married. The divorce rate of adults over 50 has doubled in the last 25 years. The U.S. has higher divorce rates than nearly all of Europe, Canada and Japan.

BREAKUPS Economic resources following divorce

Loss of joint income Men's standard of living often increases, women's decreases

BREAKUPS breakups are sometimes temporary:

Many people experience "churning" in their relationships On-again/ off-again pattern of break up and renewal Churning is disadvantageous Associated with stress and lower satisfaction Breakups are less painful than we think they'll be -Affective forecasting error

Understand how people underestimate the broader environmental and cultural influences that may undermine or promote intimate relationships.

Marital outcomes broadly influenced by... Cultural context: Laws, social norms, economic opportunities Personal context: Social networks and neighborhoods Relational context: Interactions with our partners People tend to focus mainly on relational context when explaining their marital problems

BREAKUPS Anxiously attached people have a harder time than those with secure attachment styles

Move on more easily when they have a new relationship to focus on

Explain the steps of divorce.

Personal phase: one partner grows dissatisfied Dyadic phase: discontent is revealed confrontation, negotiation, and attempts at reconciliation may occur Social phase: partners publicize their distress and seek support from friends and family Grave-dressing phase: People put the failed relationship behind them with reassessment, rationalization Resurrection phase: Partners re-enter social life as singles, often claiming to be wiser now

The PAIR project EMERGENT DISTRESS MODEL

Problems emerge after marriage No obvious difference between marriage that will fail and those that won't at the beginning.

The PAIR project ENDURING DYNAMICS MODEL

Problems emerge during courtship Problems often recognized before marriage Marriages that end in divorce are weaker than others from beginning

BREAKUPS Rumination vs reflection

Rehearsing loss and negative feelings vs. seeking meaning from our experiences People are better off when they exit a miserable marriage Some people are much happier after a divorce But a divorce is a difficult process that can leave people less well off for years Divorce is 2nd most stressful life event (following death of a spouse)

BREAKUPS Social networks following divorce

Spend more time with family & friends Lose about half of social network

Explain the Early Years of Marriage (EYM) Project and the implications of this study.

The Early Years of Marriage project started in 1986 with 174 white couples and 199 black couples in Detroit, Michigan. In 2002, sixteen years after the project began... 36% of the white couples had divorced 55% of the black couples had divorced Demonstrates the importance of social context for relationship heath

Why divorce rate has increased: INDIVIDUALSTIC CULTURE

We are less tied to our communities and the norms that might discourage divorce.

When are children the happiest?

When they live in an intact family in which little conflict or discord occurs. However, if they live amidst constant conflict, children are worse off when their parents don't divorce.

Why divorce rate has increased: WOMEN IN THE WORKPLACE

Women have greater financial freedom, alternatives and conflicts between work and family.

Parental conflict:

acrimonious interactions between one's parents cause anxiety and stress Most potent influence is parental conflict

Parental loss:

children may simply be less well off with one parent instead of two

Disillusionment Model best predicts...

divorce. Greater changes in romantic feelings for each other causes an increased likelihood of divorce.

When are children less affected by divorce?

if they maintain high-quality relationships with their parents Poorer outcomes of divorce largely disappear when the children continue to have meaningful, loving contact with both of their parents

Enduring Dynamics Model best predicts...

marital satisfaction. Couples who became distressed were less loving and affectionate when marriage began. Problems faced during engagement caused trouble later in marriage.

Parental stress:

the parents' own difficulties may affect the quality of their parenting

Economic hardship:

the poverty that often follows divorce, and not the divorce per se, may be damaging

Why divorce rate has increased: DEMANDING EXPECTATIONS

we expect more from marriage than our grandparents did. We seek fulfillment from marriage.