Treating Parent and Child Relationships Chapter 1
What causes reactive attachment disorder?
-A baby cries and nobody responds or offers comfort -A baby is hungry or wet, and they aren't attended to for hours -No one looks at, talks to, or smiles at the baby, so the baby feels alone. - A young child gets attention only bay acting out or displaying other extreme behaviors. -A young child or baby is mistreated or abused -Inconsistent meeting of child's needs - infant is hospitalized or separated from parents -infant is moved from one caregiver to another -parent is emotionally unavailable because of mental/physical illness, substance abuse, etc
Tips for parenting a child with RAD or insecure attachment
-Have realistic expectations -Patience is essential -Foster a sense of humor and joy -take care of yourself and manage stress -Find support and ask for help -Stay positive and hopeful
Teach tips for helping parents show the child is loved
-find things that feel good to your child -respond to your child's emotional age -help your child identify emotions and express his or her needs -listen, talk, and play with your child
Family therapy for child with RAD
. Typical therapy for attachment problems includes both the child and his or her parents or caregivers. Therapy often involves fun and rewarding activities that enhance the attachment bond as well as helping parents and other children in the family understand the symptoms of the disorder and effective interventions.
Child welfare stats
1.In 2008, 772,000 children were maltreated, 1.3% of all children in the US 2.72% were neglected 3.16% were physically abused 4.9% were sexually abused 5.7% were emotionally or psychologically abused
Try to maintain predictable routines and schedules with a child with RAD
A child with an attachment disorder won't instinctively rely on loved ones, and may feel threatened by transition and inconsistency—for example when traveling or during school vacations. A familiar routine or schedule can provide comfort during times of change.
Signs and symptoms of RAD: Anger problems
Anger may be expressed directly, in tantrums or acting out, or through manipulative, passive-aggressive behavior. Children with reactive attachment disorder may hide their anger in socially acceptable actions, like giving a high five that hurts or hugging someone too hard.
Tips for parents with RAD child- Stay positive and hopeful
Be sensitive to the fact that children pick up on feelings. If they sense you or the parents are discouraged, it will be discouraging to them. When you are feeling down, turn to others for reassurance
Listen, talk, and play with your child
Carve out times when you're able to give your child your full, focused attention in ways that feel comfortable to him or her. It may seem hard to drop everything, eliminate distractions, and just be in the moment, but quality time together provides a great opportunity for your child to open up to you and feel your focused attention and care
Signs and symptoms of RAD: an underdeveloped conscience
Children with reactive attachment disorder may act like they don't have a conscience and fail to show guilt, regret, or remorse after behaving badly
Teach the parent to own up to mistakes and initiate repair
Children with reactive attachment disorder or other attachment problems need to learn that although the parents may not be perfect, they will be loved, no matter what.
Teach parents to be immediately available to reconnect following a conflict w/ child w/ RAD
Conflict can be especially disturbing for children with insecure attachment or attachment disorders. After a conflict or tantrum where the parent has had to discipline the child, teach the parent to be ready to reconnect as soon as he or she is ready. This reinforces consistency and love, and will help the child develop a trust that the paretn will be there through thick and thin.
Set limits and boundaries with children w/ RAD
Consistent, loving boundaries make the world seem more predictable and less scary to children with attachment problems such as reactive attachment disorder. It's important that they understand what behavior is expected of them, what is and isn't acceptable, and what the consequences will be if they disregard the rules. This also teaches them that they have more control over what happens to them than they think.
Find things that feel good to your child
If possible, show your child love through rocking, cuddling, and holding—attachment experiences he or she missed out on earlier. But always be respectful of what feels comfortable and good to your child. In cases of previous abuse and trauma, you may have to go very
Tips for parents with RAD child- Take care of yourself and manage stress
Reduce other demands on your time and make time for yourself. Encourage parents to rest, good nutrition, and take parenting breaks helps them to recharge their batteries so they can give full attention to their child.
Tips for making child w/ RAD feel safe and secure
Safety is the core issue for children with reactive attachment disorder and other attachment problems. They are distant and distrustful because they feel unsafe in the world. They keep their guard up to protect themselves, but it also prevents them from accepting love and support. So before anything else, it is essential to build up the child's sense of security. Help parents accomplish this by establishing clear expectations and rules of behavior, and by responding consistently so the child knows what to expect when he or she acts a certain way and—even more importantly—knows that no matter what happens, the parent or caregiver can be counted on.
Disinhibited Reactive Attachment Disorder
The child doesn't seem to prefer his or her parents over other people, even strangers. The child seeks comfort and attention from virtually anyone, without distinction. He or she is extremely dependent, acts much younger than his or her age, and may appear chronically anxious.
Inhibited pattern of symptoms
The child is extremely withdrawn, emotionally detached, and resistant to comforting. The child is aware of what's going on around him or her—hypervigilanteven—but doesn't react or respond. He or she may push others away, ignore them, or even act out in aggression when others try to get close.
As children with RAD grow older, they often develop an inhibited pattern of symptoms
an inhibited pattern of symptoms or disinhibited
Help your child identify emotions and expose his or her needs
• Children with attachment disorders may not know what they are feeling or how to ask for what they need. Reinforce the idea that all feelings are okay and show them healthy ways to express their emotions.
Tips for supporting child's health: sleep
• If your child is tired during the day, it will be that much harder for them to focus on learning new things. Make their sleep schedule (bedtime and wake time) consistent.
Early warning signs and symptoms of insecure attachment
•Avoids eye contact •Doesn't smile •Doesn't reach out to be picked up •Rejects your efforts to calm, soothe, and connect •Doesn't seem to notice or care when you leave them alone •Cries inconsolably •Doesn't coo or make sounds •Doesn't follow you with his or her eyes •Isn't interested in playing interactive games or playing with toys •Spend a lot of time rocking or comforting themselves
Respond to your child's emotional age
•Children with attachment disorders often act like younger children, both socially and emotionally. You may need to treat them as though they were much younger, using more non-verbal methods of soothing and comforting.
Signs and symptoms of RAD: Aversion to physical affection
•Children with reactive attachment disorder often flinch, laugh, or even say "Ouch" when touched. Rather than producing positive feelings, touch and affection are perceived as a threat.
Parenting skills class for parents of child with RAD
•Education for parents and caregivers centers on learning about attachment disorders as well as other necessary parenting skills.
Tips for supporting child's health: exercise
•Exercise or any type of physical activity can be a great antidote to stress, frustration, and pent-up emotion, triggering endorphins to make your child feel good. Physical activity is especially important for the angry child. If your child isn't naturally active, try some different classes or sports to find something that is appealing.
Signs and symptoms of RAD: Difficulty showing care and affection
•For example, children with reactive attachment disorder may act inappropriately affectionate with strangers while displaying little or no affection towards their parents.
Tips for parents with RAD child- find support and ask for help
•Help parents to rely on friends, family, community resources, and respite care (if available). Try to get them to ask for help before they really need it to avoid getting stressed to breaking point. Encourage them to consider joining a support group for parents.
Tip for parents with RAD child- Have realistic expectations
•Helping a child with an attachment disorder may be a long road. Focus on making small steps forward and celebrate every sign of success.
Play therapy for child with RAD
•Helps your child learn appropriate skills for interacting with peers and handling other social situations.
CPS Problems
•Insufficient funding •High caseloads •Role conflict •Burnout •Family reunification is the first goal •Kinship placements •Etc.
Tips for parents with RAD child- foster a sense of humor and joy
•Joy and humor go a long way toward repairing attachment problems and energizing you even in the midst of hard work. Help parents find at least a couple of people or activities that help you laugh and feel good.
Tips for supporting child's health: DIET
•Make sure your child eats a diet full of whole grains, fruits, vegetables, and lean protein. Be sure to skip the sugar and add plenty of good fats - like fish, flax seed, avocados, and olive oil—for optimal brain health.
Signs and symptoms of RAD: Control issues
•Most children with reactive attachment disorder go to great lengths to remain in control and avoid feeling helpless. They are often disobedient, defiant, and argumentative.
Take charge, yet remain calm when a child w/ RAD is upset or misbehaving
•Remember that "bad" behavior means that the child doesn't know how to handle what he or she is feeling and needs your help. By staying calm, you show your child that the feeling is manageable. If he or she is being purposefully defiant, follow through with the pre-established consequences in a cool, matter-of-fact manner. But never discipline a child with an attachment disorder when you're in an emotionally-charged state. This makes the child feel more unsafe and may even reinforce the bad behavior, since it's clear it pushes your buttons.
Special education services for child with RAD
•Specifically designed programs within the child's school can help him or her learn skills required for academic and social success, while addressing behavioral and emotional difficulties.
Tips for parents with RAD child- Patience is essential
•The process may not be as rapid as you'd like, and you can expect bumps along the way. But by remaining patient and focusing on small improvements, you create an atmosphere of safety for the child.
Reduced child abuse rates do not tell the whole story
•The rate of children neglected has remained the same •40% of the children in the child welfare system in the US have been diagnosed with ODD, conduct disorder, developmental delays, or ADHD. •Children are served, but the parents are often not served
Individual psychological Counseling for child with RAD
•Therapists may also meet with the child individually or while the parents observe. This is designed to help your child directly with monitoring emotions and behavior.