Chapter 10: CULTURE, COMMUNICATION, AND INTERCULTURAL RELATIONSHIPS

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guanxi

A Chinese term for relational network. "relationships of social connection built on shared identities such as native place, kinship or attending the same school"

similarity principle

A principle of relational attraction suggesting that individuals tend to be attracted to people they perceive to be similar to themselves.

Differences in Notions of Friendship

Friendships are viewed differently across the world. It varies in commitment terms from culture to culture. Cultural differences in notions about friendships are related to ideas discussed earlier—ideas about identity and values. In societies that stress values like individualism and independence, as is the case in most Western cultures, it makes sense to view friendship and romance as voluntary relationships.

Anxiety

Fear about the possible consequences of our actions or uncertainty about how to act. If you have a lot of anxiety it will cause problems.

Intercultural Work Relationships

For many people, work is the place where they encounter the most diversity—working with people from different religions, generations, language backgrounds, ethnicity, races, and nationality. These encounters may be face-to-face or mediated—through telephone or computer.

intimacy

The extent of emotional closeness. As relationships develop friends share more personal and private information

Power

The people of power will not branch out because they do not want to lose their status. However, the minority group will try to branch out to gain equality

Foxhole diversity

The view that if the enemy's all around, you need people to support you

stage model

The view that relationships develop in predictable phases over time. The influence of a third culture complicates the stage model for intercultural friendships but can serve as a useful background for building these friendships.

Communication approaches

There are three communication approaches to understanding intercultural relationships: social science, interpretive, and critical.

Sexualities and Intimate Relationships

There is less information available about gay or same-sex relationships than about heterosexual romantic relationships. Homosexuality has existed in every society in every era and differed in definition cross-culturally and historically Although there are many similarities between gay/ lesbian and straight relationships, they may differ in several areas, including the roles of same-sex friendships and cross-sex friendships and the relative importance of friendships. Regardless of one's position on the desirability of gay and lesbian marriage, it is important to understand the implications for same-sex relationships, which include issues of dissolution. The dissolution of heterosexual relationships often is delayed because of family and societal pressures, religious beliefs, child custody battles, and so on.

obliteration style

A style of interaction for an intercultural couple in which both partners attempt to erase their individual cultures in dealing with cultural differences. They may form a new culture, with new beliefs and habits, especially if they live in a country that is home to neither of them. This may seem to be the only way for people whose backgrounds are completely irreconcilable to survive. it's difficult to completely cut oneself off from one's own cultural background. Not a good long-term solution

compromise style

A style of interaction for an intercultural couple in which both partners give up some part of their own cultural habits and beliefs to minimize cross-cultural differences. Although this may seem fair, it really means that both people sacrifice things that are important to them. One or both people may begin to resent their sacrifice

submission style

A style of interaction for an intercultural couple in which one partner yields to the other partner's cultural patterns, abandoning or denying his or her own culture. the most common. In this style, one partner submits to the culture of the other partner, abandoning or denying his or her own. The submission may occur in public, whereas in private life the relationship may be more balanced. Agreeing with everything that the dominant person says in the public

consensus style

A style of interaction for an intercultural couple in which partners deal with cross-cultural differences by negotiating their relationship. based on agreement and negotiation. It is related to compromise in that both partners give and take, but it is not a trade-off; rather, it is a win-win proposition. May incorporate elements of other models. It requires flexibility and negotiation

Intercultural Relationships

As with other topics, there are three communication approaches to studying intercultural relationships, and each makes a unique contribution to our understanding of how we develop and maintain relationships across differences. increasingly common; however, interracial relationships are still often disapproved of by families and by society. ■ Intercultural marriages face challenges of family and societal disapproval and issues of child rearing.

Cultural-Individual Dialectic

Communication in intercultural relationships is both cultural and individual, that is, idiosyncratic. We have described various cultural differences that exist in value orientations, in both nonverbal and verbal communication.

Family and Neighborhood

Contexts According to Dodd and Baldwin (2002), the first place we learn about communication adaptability and receptivity—how to respond to those who are different and how to respond to new situations—is in the family. The diversity of one's neighborhood also has a great influence on whether one forms intercultural friendships. Here, the proximity principle comes into play.

Differences in Communication Styles, Values, and Perceptions

Cultural differences in communication styles, values, process, thought process and beliefs system are usually enforced and never questioned until meeting someone different than us. Once commonality is established and the relationships, the cultural differences may have less impact.

cognitive consistency

Having a logical connection between existing knowledge and a new stimulus. Finding people who agree with our beliefs confirms our own

Permanent Relationships

In spite of substantial resistance to intercultural (especially interracial) romantic relationships, increasing numbers of people are marrying across racial and ethnic lines, so much so that scholar Maria P. P. Root (2001) says we are in the midst of a "quiet revolution." Intermarriage in the U.S.: In every couple, partners have to develope their own way to relate to each other. Couple should prepare to commit to each other. People who marry interculturally should consider legal issues like - their own/children's citizenship, finances, property, women's right

Intercultural romantic relationship

Individualistic emphasizes physical attraction. Collectivistic focuses on how the family views them

line of sight

Information about other people's identity based upon visible physical characteristics. People can develop solid online relationships, not based on physical attributes or attractiveness, and by the time online friends meet in person, these line of sight data don't matter much; the result can be close, lasting relationships

Religious and Educational Contexts

Institutions like schools and churches/ synagogues can play a huge part in promoting or discouraging intercultural friendships. From very recent research, it appears that integrated religious institutions and educational institutions provide the best opportunities for intercultural friendships and the best environment to improve attitudes about interracial marriage. Having ethnically varied friends has more of an influence on the propensity to engage in an interethnic romance than does being in a diverse social environment in general.

Personal-Contextual Dialectic

Intercultural relationships are both personal and contextual. There are aspects of the relationship that are personal—consistent from situation to situation— but context also plays a huge role in how intercultural relationships are developed and maintained. Studies have shown that the number-one predictor of whether individuals engage in intercultural dating is the diversity of their social networks—that is, if you are in contexts where there is diversity, it is more likely you will meet and go out with people from other ethnic/racial backgrounds

Challenges

Intercultural relationships are unique in several ways, and as such present particular challenges. By definition, they are characterized by cultural differences in communication style, values, and perceptions. Negative Stereotypes play a role in intercultural relationships. Another challenge in intercultural relationships involves the anxiety that people often experience initially. Historically, the biggest obstacles to boundary-crossing friendships have come not from minority communities, but from majority communities. For the minority group developing intercultural relationships can help them survive—economically, professionally, and personally. Includes differences in power and the need for explanations

need for explanations

Intercultural relationships is more work than in-group relationships. We need to be able to explain ourselves, our relationships, and our beliefs

romantic relationships

Intimate relationships that comprise love, involvement, sharing, openness, connectedness, and so on. intimacy is a universal dimension of romantic relationships. Research on the development of romantic relationships in the United States has focused on the importance of the individual's autonomy. There is also an emphasis on autonomy—trying to balance the needs of two "separate" individuals—in relationships can be difficult. Also, extreme individualism makes it challenging for either partner to justify sacrificing or giving more than she or he is receiving.

Beneficial Online relationship

It allows people the opportunity to communicate and develop relationships with people who are very different from us. It filters out the information on which initial impressions (and stereotypes). It's easier because Internet's relative anonymity, to reveal personal information

Friendships

Kurt Lewin (1948), a renowned psychologist, conducted a classic cross-cultural study in self-disclosure whose findings still hold true today. Lewin proposed that the personal/private self can be modeled as three concentric circles representing three areas of information we share with others. The first circle is an outer boundary that includes superficial information about ourselves and our lives—our general interests, our daily life, and so on. The middle circle includes more personal information—perhaps our life history, our family background, and so on. Then there is the inner core, which includes very personal and private information, some of which we share with no one. These spheres of information may correspond with the phases in relational development. Thus, in the exploratory stage, people exchange some personal information, and in the stability phase, they may disclose more intimate information.

Benefits of Intercultural Relationship

Learning about different parts of the world...

relational learning

Learning that comes from a particular relationship but generalizes to other contexts. Relational learning is often much more compelling than knowledge gained from books, classes, and so on. And once we develop one close intercultural relationship, it becomes much easier to form others.

Relationships

Relationships at work are characterized by hierarchy and sometimes varying attitudes toward power. ■ In gay and lesbian relationships, friendship and sexual involvement are not mutually exclusive.

intercultural relationships

Relationships that are formed between individuals from different cultures. May feature differences in age, physical ability, gender, ethnicity, class, religion, race, or nationality. The key to these relationships often involves maintaining a balance between differences and similarities.The benefits of such relationships include (1) acquiring knowledge about the world, (2) breaking stereotypes, and (3) acquiring new skills. ■ Through relationships, we acquire specific and general knowledge, break stereotypes, and acquire new skills. ■ Special challenges of intercultural relationships include coping with differences, tending to stereotype, dealing with anxiety, and having to explain ourselves to others. ■ There are six dialectics of intercultural relationships: personal-contextual, differences-similarities, cultural-individual, privilege-disadvantage, static-dynamic, and history/past-present/future. often include competence, similarity, involvement, and turning points. THe key to these relationships is balancing the differences and similarities.

Dialectic Approach

Researcher Leslie A. Baxter (1993) suggests that a dialectical model explains the dynamics of relationships. She and her colleagues have identified several basic dialectical tensions in relationships: novelty-predictability, autonomy-connection, and openness-closedness. That is, we can simultaneously feel the need to be both connected and autonomous in relationships with our parents, friends, and romantic partners. We may also feel the need simultaneously for novelty and predictability and the need to be open and yet private in our relationships. The dialectical tension rests, on the one hand, in the social, political, and economic contexts that make some kinds of intercultural relationships possible and, on the other hand, in the desires and motives of the partners involved.

self-disclosure

Revealing information about oneself. This is a turning point of understandings and may move the relationships to a new level. Turning point will make or break a friendship based on friend's actions. THis is always in flux and may move the relationship forward or backward

Same-Sex relationships

Same-sex friendships may differ because gay men may not have the typical heterogenous U.S. Socialization. Some gay partners may be prosecuted or killed. Many gay and lesbian people report strained relationships with families. The social support from friends in the gay relationships are very important. Gay marriage is legal in some states. Some gay relationships may terminate earlier than straight marriages due to lack of family, social pressures, religious beliefs, custody battles, etc. Although short-lived, gay relationships may be happier and more mutually productive

Static-Dynamic Dialectic

This dialectic suggests that people and relationships are constantly in flux, responding to various personal and contextual dynamics. Intercultural relationships are no different in this regard.

Intercultural Friendships

Trust, respect, and mutual affection

Intercultural Dating

We are attracted to them, and the relationship offers benefits—increased knowledge about the world and the breaking of stereotypes. The main reason for not dating within the ethnic group was lack of attraction. However, the reasons for not dating outside the ethnic group was not dating outside were different such as not having an opportunity to do so and not having thought about it. Several decades ago, researcher Phillip E. Lampe (1982) investigated interethnic dating among students attending a college in Texas. He discovered that the reasons students gave for dating within and outside their own ethnic group were very similar: They were attracted to the other person, physically and/or sexually. The reasons people give for dating within and outside their own ethnic groups are similar that they are attracted to the other person, physically/sexually.

Privilege-Disadvantage Dialectic

We have stressed the importance of (and the difficulty of understanding) power and power differentials in intercultural relationships. People may be simultaneously privileged and disadvantaged, or privileged in some contexts and disadvantaged in others.

Similarity

While dissimilarity may account for the initial attractions, you need to find and balance similarities

Dangers of Online Relationships

You blindly believe what people say about themselves which can be dangerous and there are dangerous apps (Blue whale)

History/Past-Present/Future Dialectic

cultural groups have different relationships with each other; some of these relationships are more positive and others more negative.

Differences in Relational Development Cultural

differences often come into play in the very beginning stages of relational development, in initial interactions. Different cultural rules govern how to regard strangers. In some cultural communities, all strangers are viewed as sources of potential relationships; in others, relationships can develop only after long and careful scrutiny.

Critical Approach

emphasizes the influence of various contexts—institutional, political, and historical—in facilitating and/or discouraging the development and maintenance of intercultural relationships. It is important to consider intercultural relationships in the contexts in which they emerge—whether the contexts are supportive or whether they discourage intercultural relationships. ■ Family, schools, and religious institutions can either hinder or discourage intercultural relationships.

Historical and Political Contexts

history is an important context for understanding intercultural interactions and relationships. All this points to the effect of power on hierarchical relations of communication. Although power does not determine communication patterns in any simple causal sense, it does have an impact on the direction communication takes within intercultural relations. colonial histories frames relationships.

Social Science Approach

identifies cross-cultural differences in how relationships are defined, initiated, and developed. identifies various cross-cultural differences in relationships—including notions of friendships and the initiation and development of relationships. The social science approach emphasizes the individual role in relationships and identifies various cross-cultural differences in notions of friendship and how relationships are developed and maintained.

Intercultural Relationships Online

more and more people are using new technologies to communicate. The first and perhaps the most important impact of new communication technologies, particularly for young people, is the opportunities they provide for developing and maintaining relationships. One dialectic was digital privilege/ marginalization. The students reported that they experienced some privilege in these online encounters because of the fluidity and flexibility of online identities, as well as the suspension of prejudgment based on nonverbal cues. Another dialectic was trust/suspicion. The students explained that the use of some linguistic symbols and special cues facilitated the expression of their cultural selves. Language differences also create a dialectic for online interaction and intercultural relationships—both facilitating and hindering intercultural communication. The asynchronicity of some online communication allows nonnative speakers more time to compose a message and to decode and respond than is true to face-to-face interaction—thus facilitating communication. However, at the same time, language differences can lead to possible misunderstanding of specific words and phrases and humor online can often be misunderstood—thus inhibiting intercultural communication.

Interpretive Approach

provides in-depth descriptions of various types of intercultural relationships and explores in depth the nature of these relationships and the role communication plays.


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