Chapter 3

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family structure

83.7% of families were married or common-law (2011) More families are divorced, remarried, or single-parents than in the past Fewer children live with biological parents More same-sex couples --massive increase in divorces when the divorce act was made -the risk of divorce of couples Is estimated to be 37%(?) - step and blended families are becoming more common since people often remarry -the highest cohabitation rates are in Quebec- more social acceptance of that in that province -Quebec was originally very influenced by the catholic church- the quiet revolution changed a lot of the ways families were changing -protestant families at the time had a lot less control over family -2005 same sex marriage was legalized

less likely to divorce

Women working: now a marriage stabilizer Sharing house-keeping Sharing bread-winning Respond to bids for attention

judith stacey theory

homosexual parents work harder to ensure they are good parents- may be better for the children

online dating

huge internet business- -836 websites in 2005; $473 million in 2004 In 2001, online dating was ½ of all online transactions. 25% of singles have tried it. Can help with self-disclosure and eventually intimacy It also offers anonymity: -Deception is common -Cheating is easy -Short-term hook-ups -People placed greater trust on less attractive photos they saw than the more attractive photos

living apart together

intimate relationship with someone who lives elsewhere

in canada today

majority of all families live as married or common law couples in either heterosexual and same sex relationships -decrease in marriage rates -common law couples grew -when they do get married for the first time, the average age is substantially higher than in the past

support of same sex marriage

necessary to ensure same sex couples receive equal benefits unless marriage is abolished all together

sex and gender

no one is born a woman or a man, masculinity and femininity are constructed by society and it affects our identity, but nothing is biological

dating

social activities that can establish the possibility of a long-term relationship -Less regimented than in the past -More relationships formed through friendship groups -most relationships are happening through mixed gender friendships nowadays -baby boom generation- premarital sex is becoming more popular -hooking up is becoming more common, mostly including physical factor but also some that is not -these casual relationships are said to be very detrimental to women

67%

what percentage of canadian census families are married couples?

common gendered differences

women wanting emotional engagement and romance men engaging in sexual competitions and scoring -women should limit their sexual relationship to serious relationships, not putting out on the first date -same sex couples: people see gay couples as focused on sexual relationships and lesbian couples as emotionally focussed

families of choice

"kin-like networks of relationships based on friendship and commitment beyond blood" -based on commitment beyond blood- pretty common with non-heterosexual people -There are some limitations if people are too inclusive with who they call family- like if they see their coworkers as family they may want to be at work more than home

pure relationshp

-satisfies both partners -emotional and sexual intimacy freed from reproduction -egalitarianism and intimacy central to love people have been having more sex for fun- expressing sexual interest (not just for the sake of reproduction) Relationships have been increasingly focused on intimacy, and less pressure in society about getting married

confluent love

Active and casual love rather than 'forever' notions of romantic love. Giddens defines the emergence of pure relationships as ___________, a relationship of sexual and emotional equality between men and women

The Real Modern Family (Todd and Scotch Video)

Can be very difficult to be find a child to adopt-> many new born babies put up for adopted are ones who have serious disabilities & if the baby is healthy, gay couples are probably at the bottom of the list to getting that baby This process of picking the egg donor, they are choosing to have this woman and her family to almost co-parent

more likely to divorce

Men with traditional marriage values One partner does housework One "bread-winner"

intimacy and technology

Minority, but growing number of long-term relationships List best traits in exchange for another's traits Ideas about masculinity and femininity Some sites allow selection of racial preferences Cybersex: online sexual talk and often masturbation is also growing in popularity -about 1/3rd of men and women have participated in cyber sex - more common for gay couples exchange theory- online offers a way to show your best traits and also to be able to see what is out there through the cost of using the computer -rise in religious dating groups

canada

Provincial governments recognized cohabiting couples in policy 2002: Cohabiting couples excluded from property law Traditional family values and ideologies remain -it is not always getting better and more inclusive as time goes on (2002 event above)

marriage

Public: it is between two people and the state. Recognized by the community and extended family; allows you to present yourself as a good family- fulfilling societies view of what you SHOULD be Private: it centers on an intimate relationship. Benefits and legal status Symbolic Value: Presentation of "good" relationships, not just private actions.

critique of same sex marriage

Same-sex marriage as potentially transforming marriage into more "alternative" forms -Including same sex marriages is not gonna include everyone- every time you cause more inclusion there is a bit more exclusion May open the door to more alternative forms of family -homosexuality was seen as a disorder back in the day-manual of mental disorders in the late 1980s -before 1969 it was considered a crime There is still problems with acceptance of transgendered and transsexual people

marriage

Some people are being very critical of marriage but its still maintaining a lot of value- people want to get married

Robert Willey article

Theoretical mechanisms he uses and their implications for understanding courtship

Andrew Cherlin

basic idea: in the past marriage was considered natural and it people were considered mentally ill if they did not get married -people want to have a big party for their weddings -symbolc value of marriage is more than it used to be (its a symbol of saying i have a good personal life and i want to celebrate it by getting married) -use to be about two merging families, but now its more about the two individuals new trend: living together THEN marriage

4

canada was the __th country in the world to legalize gay marriage

gender and sexuality

changing expectations: women expect more from male spouses (housework, emotional connection, childcare)- everything is more of a shared effort nowadays -social movements led to questioning gender roles -inequalities remain persuasive -ideal was designed around nuclear family and women just got slotted in -in europe women did work, but the "better" way of life was assumed to be if it was only the man working

one person

for the first time in 2011, the census counted more ______ households than couple households with children

rise in divorce rates

idea that people go for self-fulfillment and their own well being more than long term commitment, causing a

homonormativity

idea that there is a normal/natural same-sex person/relationship

friendship ethic

identifying friends as primary source of emotional support -If homosexual people are experiencing discrimination at home because of their sexuality, they may loo to other friends/kinships that accept them -most of them identified friendship as their main source of emotional support -careful planning and arranging in having children

family networks

recoginized as increasingly diverse -growing importance of intimacy in family formation -ongoing concerns about how families are formed within different social networks -there are many different ways in which these can form -same sex couples, children who are born outside of marriage, and children who's parents are divorced are becoming more acceptable -but as divorce became more common, there's a lot of concern about what's happening with family

intimate relationships

recognition of 'love' and intimacy as central to marriage Criminalization of marital sexual assault in 1983 (consent used to be assumed with marriage) Same-sex marriage legalized in 2005 -falling in love was seen as trouble to marriage (mistresses, etc.)

less emphasis on marriage

rising divorce rates-idea that people go for self-fulfillment and their own well being more than long term commitment -people are becoming more tolerant to relationships -birth control pill in the 1960s

family demographers

seek to answer why individuals behave as they do toward each other and how societies compare in their family configurations and in their political, economic and cultural institutions

singleness

still some stigma -A lot of people will try to suggest people/places you could find someone to marry

intimacy

strong emotional bond such as love Rising ethics of "individual self-fulfillment and achievement" (Ch. 3) Traditionally about lifelong commitment ex. Bid for attention- for ex. The opposite would be If partner is really into bird watching and he's looking at birds, trying to get you to be interested but she doesn't care-> asking how the other persons day was, showing interest in their interests etc. builds up ________ over time


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