COMM-218 Chapter 3

Different Kinds of Impression Management

1) Face-to-Face Impression Management - Communicators can manage their front in three ways: manner (words and nonverbal actions), appearance (the personal items people use to shape an image, such as clothing or uniforms) and setting (physical items we use to influence how others view us such as artwork, music, car, house). 2) Impression Management in Social Media - Social media lacks the richness of of other channels, because you don't hear the voice, postures, gestures, or facial expressions. 3) Impression Management and Honesty - Deception is common, especially online. Over ⅓ have admitted to giving false information online and ½ have pretended to be someone they are not. Each of us has a cast of characters and being a competent communicator is choosing the best role for the situation.

Different Selves (Identity)

1) Material - To wear nice clothes, have a nice house, travel, have a gym membership. 2) Social - To see your friends, see your partner, see your family 3) Spiritual - To motivate you to be better, God

How the Self-Concept Develops

1) Reflected Appraisal - A mirroring of others' judgements. To the extent that which you have received supportive messages, you have learned to appreciate and value yourself, whereas receiving critical signals can make you feel less valuable, lovable, and capable. 2) Social Comparison - Evaluating ourselves in comparison with others. We decide whether we are superior or inferior (which influences our self-esteem) and whether we are similar or different (which influences our self-concept) by comparing ourselves to what social scientists call reference groups - others against whom we evaluate our own characteristics. Reference groups could be models or social media profiles, often negatively.

Alternatives to Self-Disclosure

1) Silence - Keep your thoughts and feelings to yourself. 2) Lying - Benevolent lies are defined as an attempt to hide or misrepresent the truth but not maliciously and can actually be helpful often used to avoid hurting the other person. "Misdemeanor" lying is often a small, white lie whereas "felony" lying is a serious threat that often lead to the end of a relationship. 3) Equivocation - Statements that are not literally false but clearly avoid an unpleasant truth. It is telling a partial truth. Telling the partial truth allows them to maintain an image of themselves as honest and trustworthy individuals. The underlying point of equivocal messages is usually understood by their recipients. 4) Hinting - More direct than equivocal statements. A hint seeks to get the desired response from the other person whereas an equivocal message isn't necessarily aimed at changing another's behavior. The success of a hint depends on the other's ability to pick up the unexpressed message. The Ethics of Evasion - There are times when honesty is the right answer, and there are times when doing one of the alternatives to self-disclosure is the right answer.

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

A person's expectations of an event, and his or her subsequent behavior based on those expectations, make the outcome more likely to occur. While it's tempting to credit the horoscope for the outcome it's important to realize that you were responsible for bringing the prediction to pass.

Self-Esteem

Your measure of value and evaluations of self-worth everyday. How you feel about about the qualities that define who you are. At the end of the day, you determine your own value in life. Other things are factors but ultimately, you get to decide whether it will motivate or discourage you.

Public vs Private Selves

The perceived self is the person you believe yourself to be in moments of honest self-examination, and may not be accurate in every respect. The present self is a public image - the way we want to appear to others. Goffman used the word face to describe a socially approved identity and used the term facework to describe the verbal and nonverbal ways in which we act to maintain our own presenting image and the images of others. Behavior by putting on a front is when we are around others who we want to impress. In contrast, behavior in the back region is when we are alone. They are often quite different. EX: The way you act in front of your class vs. the way you act in the shower.

Maslow's Four Levels of Awareness

Unconscious Incompetence - Is not aware of information. Conscious Incompetence - Becomes aware of information and is ready for change. Conscious Competence - Reminding yourself to do it and doing it. Unconscious Competence - You don't have to think about it anymore, you just do it.

Rule of Reciprocation

Give and take, repay debts, favors.

Johari Window

Information Type Examples: Open Self - Location, appearance. Blind Self - Your breath stinks, you have a leaf stuck in your hair. Hidden Self - You had a bad dream last night. Unknown Self - You aren't really going to be BFFs.

Risks of Self-Disclosure

Revealing deeply personal information can destroy a relationship. 1) Rejection - Fear of disapproval, can be exaggerated and illogical, but there are real dangers in revealing too personal of information. 2) Negative Impression - Even if disclosure doesn't lead to total rejection, it can create a negative impression. 3) Decrease in Relational Satisfaction - Disclosure can lead to a decrease in satisfaction in a relationship or a "falling out". 4) Loss of Influence - Disclosure can cause a potential loss of influence in the relationship, like confessing a secret weaknesses. 5) Loss of Control - Disclosure means losing control of the information, you never know if it could spread. 6) Hurting the Other Person - Disclosure can lead to hurting or upsetting others.

Self-Disclosure Factors

Self-Disclosure Factors: It's impossible not to make yourself known to others. For a communication act to be considered self-disclosing, it must have the self as the subject, be intentional, be directed at another person, be honest, be revealing, contain information generally unavailable from other sources, and gains much of its intimate nature from the context in which it was expressed. Honesty - As long as you are honest and accurate to the bet of your knowledge, communication can qualify as an act of self-disclosure. Depth - Self-disclosure reveals personal or "deep" information rather than surface information. What is considered deep may be different for every person. Availability of Information - Self-disclosing messages must contain information that the other person is not likely to know at the time or be able to obtain from another source. Context of Sharing - Self-disclosure is affected by the setting in which it was stated, such as the difference between sharing something online vs. sharing something with a coach.

Self-Concept

Consistent yet subjective perceptions you hold of yourself. Your attitudes, beliefs, talents, likes, dislikes, roles, and values. A healthy self-concept is flexible, yet it often resists change. The Self-Concept is Subjective - Based on or influenced by personal feelings, tastes, or opinions. We can see ourselves distorted, sometimes we view ourselves more leniently, and sometimes more harshly. Self-evaluations can be distorted by obsolete information (your past failures/successes don't predict failures/successes in the future), distorted feedback (the remarks of overly critical people can leave a lasting effect on your ego, whether it's positive or negative), perfectionism (naive belief in perfection can distort the self-concept), and social expectations (our perfectionist society rewards those who downplay their strengths, which leads many people to dwell on their shortcomings while downplaying their accomplishments). A Healthy Self-Concept is Flexible - People change over their life, but people also change from context to context. The Self-Concept Resists Change - People with high self-esteem tend to seek out partners who view them favorably, and people with low self-esteem tend to seek out partners who view them unfavorably. This tendency to seek confirmation of an existing self-concept is called cognitive conservatism. If we think we are doing a good job at something, we are reluctant to listen to further advice, as well as the other way around, when we think we are doing a bad job we will find it hard to take compliments.

Benefits of Self-Disclosure

Self-disclosure is essential to building relationships. Privacy Management is the choices people make to reveal or conceal information about themselves. 1) Catharsis - Disclosing information to "get it off your chest". 2) Self-Clarification - "Talking it out". 3) Self-Validation - Disclosing information to seek the listener's agreement or validation of your behavior - which is confirmation of a belief you hold on yourself. 4) Reciprocity - A well-documented conclusion from research is that one person's act of self-disclosure increases the odds that the other person will reveal personal information. 5) Impression Formation - Revealing personal information to make ourselves feel more attractive, which research shows seems to work. 6) Relationship Maintenance and Enhancement - Research demonstrates that we like people who disclose personal information to us, we reveal more about ourselves to people we like, and we tend to like others more after we have disclosed to them. Self-disclosure can improve troubled relationships and lack of it is detrimental to them. 7) Moral Obligation - Disclosing personal information out of a sense of moral obligation, such as people with HIV.

Social Penetration Model

Superficial - Rituals/Cliches Intimate - Facts Personal - Opinions Core - Feelings

Impression Management

The attempt by people to get others to see them as they want to be seen. The characteristics of impression management is: 1) We Strive to Construct Multiple Identities - Meaning the variety of roles you play such as "joking friend", "hardworking student", "helpful neighbor", etc.. 2) Impression Management is Collaborative - Meaning as we perform our identities to our audiences, the other person must react and respond well to the identity for a relationship to work. 3) Impression Management can be Deliberate or Unconscious - Meaning job interviews and first dates are clear examples of deliberate impression management, or unconscious meaning a facial reaction or body language that you don't realize when it's occurring.