Conflict management 7 and 9

Discover and describe micro events:

1. Act as a qualitative researcher who uses observation and interviewing to determine patterns 2. Obtain a professional third party, consultant, mediator, therapist, description of conflicts 3. Keep a journal of conflict episodes that seem repetitive 4. Ask newcomers to a system to describe what they have experienced so far.

Transform

1. Change the style of expression 2. Alter the degree of interdependence between parties 3. Change their perceptions of their goals so they are compatible 4. Balance power 5. Modify the actual or perceived scarcity of resources 6. Adjust the actual perceived interference by the parties.

People form coalitions to:

1. Share topic information 2. Get support and understanding 3. Sense of belonging 4. Gain power 5. Feel justified 6. Feel Important

As coalitions strengthen:

1. stress their similarities to each other 2. highlight their dissimilarities to others 3. accelerate these differences throughout time.

coalition

A private bond emerges. The communication is hidden. They orient to one another, share more information, and feel closer. When people feel excluded they call them cliques.

Coalitions become toxic when

Coalitions become toxic when they become so tight that the groups get locked into destructive conflict with one another. Exclusion and inclusion is the most powerful human force in social life.

System wide patterns:

Everyone affects everyone else. Systems have characteristics. - Attention is focused on connections and relationships rather than on individual characteristics - The whole is considered to be greater than the sum of its part - Each part can only be understood in the context of the whole - A change in any one part will affect every other part.

type 3

Intimate-aggressive: combine intimate behavior with aggressive acts. Conflict usually ends with intimacy. Satisfaction depends on whether their conflict leads to intimacy or someone derails the predictable outcome by aggression that is too vicious.

type 4

Intimate-nonaggressive: partners use small amounts of attacking or blaming behavior, retaining their intimacy in other ways. Satisfied whether they confront the issues or not.

Couples: type 1

Non-intimate-aggressive: foster escalation without any corresponding intimacy. Couples are aggressive towards each other without enjoying the benefit of emotional closeness. Not satisfying, energy is drained.

type 2:

Non-intimate-nonaggressive: lack vitality, intimacy, and escalation. They are more satisfied than type 1, since they do not have to contend with escalating conflicts.

Conflict Triangles

Occur frequently. When you think you are the low-power person, you try to form a coalition with another person. People feel more empowered when communication is direct.

Conflict stage 1

Stage 1: Members experience a minimal amount of conflict, openly communicate, and share power. No distress for the system.

Conflict stage 2

Stage 2: Members experience significant conflict that they see as causing a problem. Criticism increases, but there is still little power or overt struggle for control. One person is pursuing and the other is distancing, and they have some difficulty agreeing on how much separateness they should have.

Conflict stage 3

Stage 3: Members are in turbulence, high intensity, moving toward polarization. Unable to exchange information accurately, and criticize. Power struggle is serious and life or death quality to conversations.

Conflict stage 4

Stage 4: Members have lost the ability to work through have engaged the services of a third party. Work to enhance their individual bargaining, a couple is headed toward disengagement or divorce.

Arbitration

The arbitrator listens to both sides, questions you and the other, and renders a judgment. both parties enter voluntarily. Keeps one party from using passive-aggressive tactics. Many arbitrators have specialized training in the content area. Arbitration is readily available for use when participants experience a communication breakdown and are no longer able to solve their problems. It is a process that can be used for a wide variety of issues.

Interaction rule:

The rules guide behavior in more subtle ways. The way things are done. If you bring them to the surface, they can be changed. System rules should be prescriptive and simple

Couples react in 4 ways to conflict

They avoid it, tolerate it, attempt to fight fairly, or process it (active listening and telling the emotional as factual)

Binding

When the parties contractually agree to arbitration, the judgment is enforced in court

Morphostatic

avoid change

Negotiation

create safe setting, establish common ground, set an agenda, balance power with equal talking time

Follow up

decide procedure, notify other stakeholders of actions, reach agreement for further disputes, embed agreement

Micro Analysis

describing interaction rules and micro events

Transformation occurs when clients experience empowerment and give recognition to each other. Types of empowerment:

empowerment of goals), (empowerment of options. (empowerment of skills), (empowerment of resources, empowerment of decision making)

Advantages for adjudication

equal protection of the law allows everyone access to a resolutation process and does not require the agreement of the other party. It serves as a power-balancing mechanism. Provides rules for fairness such as admission of evidence. Professionals speaks for them. It serves as a backup for other conflict management procedures.

Entry:

explain process, clarify role and credibility, explore consequences for not proceeding

Diagnosis

gather data with interviews and observations. Look at conflict elements (topic relational identity procedure) avoid rushing to solutions

Agreements

generate different ways to meet agreements. Specific 5 W. Agree (oral written legal)

Structure of conflicts:

identify specific system patterns, chart conflict triangles, drawing coalitions.

Devitalized marriages

in which the relationship is a hollow shell of what, originally was vibrant and living.

Morphogenesis:

innovating change

Descriptive language

is a tool to avoid blaming

Adjudication

is the process in which parties present their cases before of judge or jury. Parties are unable to solve their own conflicts. Can be put into motion with mutual consent.

nonbinding arbitration

is used when parties have no contractually agreed to binding. If parties don't agree, they process to more arbitration or court.

isolates

justify their exclusion. resist joining and take pleasure in being different. They provide their own internal support system and decline offers to merge with others. In the workplace, isolates leave at twice the rate and perform worse than others. Isolates complain about the decisions or personalities of central people yet resist coming closer to the center of communication flow.

Shuttle diplomacy

keeping the parties separate and bringing messages back and forth.

circular causality

looking at the sequence of patterns in the conflict process.

Counseling

meeting with one person individually or meeting with two people or an entire family system. The counselor focuses on all the issues at stake- emotional and relations issues and the topic of disputes. The counselor might help with personal issues. May include psychological issues. Can help with self confidence. If you feel isolated.

Mediation

no power to render a decision or impose a solution. Helps parties to work out their differences and to construct a mutually acceptable solution. Helps parties negotiate to reach an agreement facilitated by the mediator. Mediator controls the process- not letting others interrupt call names escalate avoid. Does not control the outcome it must come from The parties themselves.

Limitations to mediation

not all conflict parties can agree to work their conflict with one another. May not want to talk openly in the presence of the other. If u think u will win in court u won't wana mediator. May not work for some relationships, they have to be committed. Rather try other routes or just continue conflict. Weak relationship bonds don't work. Too much and too little involvement doesn't work either. Woman who have been abused can't speak confidently or speak their options or avoid being manipulated. Sometimes not worth the effort.

Limitations for adjudication

overused and misused. Many delays. Conflict parties can't make their own decisions. Adversarial systems operates on a win/lose basis and encourages escalation tactics.

Advantages for using mediation in the workplace

reduces cost of protracted disputes. Mediation increases satisfaction with outcome of disputes. Enhances relationships. Reduces reoccurrence of conflict.

Passive-congenial

relationships, in which both partners accept a conventional, calm, ordered marriage that maintains little conflict.

Conflict-habituated

relationships, which conflict recurs constantly but has little productive effect.

Microevents:

repetitive loops of observable interpersonal behaviors with a redundant outcome. Micro events are descriptive. Clusters of behaviors organized into structurally repetitive episodes. Interactions that give information about other interactions. Once the underlying structure in decoded, one can predict where, when, or how conflict will erupt.

Limitations for arbitration

resolve conflicts solely on a content basis. Does not focus on relational or identity issues. You cannot solve your own problems.

Total marriages

share virtually every aspect of their life, fulfilling each other.

Advantages of mediation

solutions are more likely to be carried out. The agreement is there's and there is no loser. Mutual empowerment by mutual cooperation. More likely to be creative and integrative. Helps meet underlying interests rather than fight over positions. Cheaper.

Victim offender restitution: VOR

specialized form of mediation designed for cases in which someone is guilty of a crime, this system brings in the victim to the process. Both the victim and perpetrator say their sides and review options for compensation of the victim. Recognizes the victims rights, allows offender to take responsibility and provides avenues for restoration.

Macro Analysis

the workings of an entire system and subsystems in organizations, small groups, and families. Wholeness, organization, patterning

Heavy communicators:

those who are central to passing and receiving messages from network members. Resist being moved out of the central role and complain about the over load of work involved in keeping the system happy.

Advantages of using skilled third parties

trained in intervention and does not have a vested interest in a specific outcome. Transform the conflict elements. So people can move on.

Coaching:

unable or unwilling to engage in mediation. Designed to empower clients to handle conflicts. Helps deal with strong emotions and helps the person make a more productive response. -Emotional intelligence, listening openly, reframing, and supporting the identity of the other. Teach, solve, and transform conflicts. Helps become collaborative.

Vital relationships

which involve intense mutual sharing of important life events.