Human Communication: The Basic Course (Chapter 13)

Nonnegotiation

A special type of avoidance. You refuse to discuss the conflict or to listen to the other person's argument.

Force

An unproductive conflict strategy in which a person attempts to win an argument by physical force or threats of force.

Avoidance

An unproductive conflict strategy in which a person takes mental or physical flight from the actual conflict.

Verbal Aggressivness

An unproductive conflict strategy in which one person tries to win an argument by inflicting psychological pain, by attacking the other person's self-concept.

Content Conflict

Centers on objects, events, and person that are usually, though not always, external to the parties involved in the conflict.

Spontaneity

Communication pattern in which a person verbalizes what he or she is thinking without attempting to develop strategies for control.

Interpersonal Conflict

Conflicts between and among individuals who are interdependent, mutually aware that their goals are incompatible, and perceive each other as interfering with the attainment of their own goals.

Avoiding

I lose, you lose. Relatively unconcerned with their own or with their opponents' needs or desires. They avoid any real communication about the problem, change topics when the problem is brought up, and generally withdraw both psychologically and physically.

Accomodating

I lose, you win. You sacrifice your own needs for the needs of the other person(s). Primary goal is to maintain harmony and peace in the relationship or group.

Compromising

I win and lose, you win and lose. Some concern for your own needs and some concern for the other's needs. Likely to result in maintaining peace, but there will be a residue of dissatisfaction over the inevitable losses that each side has to endure.

Competing

I win, you lose. Great concern for your own needs and desires and little of those of others. As long as your needs are met, the conflict has been dealt with successfully (for you).

Collabrating

I win, you win. You address both your own and the other person's needs. This style, often considered the ideal, takes time and a willingness to communicate - especially to listen to the perspectives and the needs of the other person.

Relationship Conflict

Interpersonal conflicts, concerned not so much with external objects as with the relationship between the individuals.

Manipulation

Involves an avoidance of open conflict. The manipulative individual tries to divert conflict by being especially charming (disarming, actually).

Argumentiveness

Refers to your willingness to argue for a point of view, your tendency to speak your mind on significant issues.

Win-Win Solution

Solutions in which both you and the other person or side win.

Win-Lose Solution

Solutions in which one person or one side wins (usually you or your side) and the other person or other side loses.

Personal Rejection

Someone practicing this withholds approval and affection from his or her opponent in conflict, seeking to win the argument by getting the other person to break down in the face of this withdrawal.

Gunnysacking

The practice of storing up grievances so as to unload them at another time.

Empathy

Try to feel what the other person is feeling and to see the situation as the other person does.

Beltlining

When you hit someone below the emotional belt line.

Blame

an unproductive conflict strategy in which we attribute the cause of the conflict to the other person or devote our energies to discovering who is the cause and avoid talking about the issues causing the conflict.