The Break-UP

Cuz she's going to move out of the place.

Did she say she was moving out?

No. I put half my money in the place.

Well you're obviously not the one calling the shots in this case.

I don't need a key.

Why?

--I mean I hate to be shitty about it, so cut and dry. --Buts lets face it, she said she doesn't want to be with you anymore and I believe her.

--And we got ta figure it out. --And you got ta get a place to go and lick your wounds while you get your head right about this...

She will. Oh, she's gonna move out. I'm gonna keep the place. I'm not moving out of the place.

...I'll leave you a key...

No I'm not. I'm being honest with you. I don't want anything to happen with Brooke.

...Me Neither...

Yeah, but I own the place.

...With her..

Please don't do anything.

Alright...

Mm hmm

Because you have to find somebody that can't be traced back to either of us to find out who's she with..

What at you talking about?

Because, if they can trace him back to either one of us--

What are you talking about?

Have you checked her email?

I mean it. Honestly.

I get it.

Listen to me. Promise to me that you're not gonna do anything.

I gotcha.. It's better if... you don't know anything.

What are you talking about?

I'll take care of it.

No. That's not what it's about.

Maybe she's with another guy, maybe she's not. I don't know, I'm not Colombo okay. But what we do know, is that she doesn't want to be with you anymore.

John, do me a favor here, seriously.

Oh I know. Smart. You're Smart.

I'm not moving out of the place.

Oh you're not?

I don't want anything to happen.

Right... Say it Louder.

She's not with anyone else. I'm telling you!

That's a problem. They're not dumb. Cops are smart, trust me.

I don't check emails.

Well you can get a program that records keystrokes. Costs like 20 bucks. Very easy to use. Okay? You find out her password. You check her email. You find out everything about her. That's how I found out about the Puerto Rican that Stacy was running around with.

And I'm just like, You're done with the relationship?

Well you're obviously hurt about it. She got you. Your hurt. There's nothing to be ashamed of. She hurt you.

She was like, um you dress however you wanna dress. You know, do whatever you want to do. I'm done with the relationship.

Whatever.

Yeah. But it's not up to her who gets to keep the ********ed place.

Yeah, I think what you gotta do now is really think hard.

Why won't you listen to me?

You listen to me. I'm gonna leave you a key.

Nothing. Promise me. I'm gonna go home. I can't do this. I'm exhausted.

You need a phone record. Do me a favor. Make a couple of phone calls on your way home. Especially around 10...

Will you look at me? I'm not hurt. I'm a little shocked. Surprised.

You're devastated. What's the name of the guy she's doing? I'm gonna solve your Problem. What's his name?

I'm not gonna ----

You're gonna stay with me. I'm not gonna hear it.

Okay, you are reading a little too much into the situation. There is no one she's running around with, Okay? We had a fight, got a little emotional.

You're probably right... She's probably not sleeping with anybody...

Promise me you won't have anyone do anything to him.

but you gotta tell me exactly what you want me to say if the cops come... Because we gotta have the same story.