Writing a Narrative Application Essay
Read the sentence. I could tell by the mischievous gleam in their eyes and the sneaky looks they were exchanging that my little brother and sister had been planning to deceive me in some way. The most precise replacement for the underlined word is "_______________." ~Arranging ~Preparing ~Conniving ~Organizing
~Conniving
Read the excerpt from Spencer's narrative. I could not have been more stunned. "He" was a "she"! Our new football coach was a female. My mind drifted to that day last week. We had all been waiting in the locker room to meet our new coach, secretly wondering what he would be like. Would he be tough but fair? Would he be demanding but understanding? Would he motivate us before each game with a rousing speech the way Coach Jackson always had? These thoughts were abruptly interrupted when our new coach entered the locker room, stood before us, and commanded our attention. Spencer decided to structure his narrative to start at the end. How did this affect his arrangement of the plot? ~Spencer had to include the most exciting and engaging parts of the narrative. ~Spencer had to include a conclusion since the reader already knew what happened. ~Spencer had to provide detailed background information about his new football coach. ~Spencer had to go back and recount the events that led to that moment.
~Spencer had to go back and recount the events that led to that moment.
Read the paragraph from a personal narrative. *1* It may have seemed like an ordinary day to everyone else, but to me, it couldn't have been further from it. *2* Today was my first day working as a waitress at Pete's Pizza Haven, and I could not have been more excited. *3* In fact, I was so excited that I rushed to get ready much faster than I typically do. *4* "I'm ready to go!" I shouted, bouncing down the stairs and flying into the kitchen, where my mom was making breakfast. *5* "I have so much to learn and don't want to be late," I declared for emphasis. *6* My mom just grinned and placed a steaming plate of eggs before me. Which should be added after sentence 6 to most effectively move the plot forward? ~The excitement of my new job started to wane, and I began to reconsider if this was truly how I wanted to spend my summer. ~Once I arrived, I quickly learned that my job would also entail wiping tables, mopping floors, and washing dishes. ~I gulped down my food, grabbed my bus card, and pecked my mother on the cheek as I raced out the door. ~As I think back on my first job, I remember the many mistakes I made and the important lessons I learned.
~I gulped down my food, grabbed my bus card, and pecked my mother on the cheek as I raced out the door.
Read the paragraph from Liam's narrative. *1*I had never been more frightened in my entire life. *2*As I stepped onto the diving platform, I waited for instructions from my diving coach. *3*Only because his directions were so clear, and because he was so nice, was I able to do it. *4*It had all been worth it, I thought, as I changed from my bathing suit back into clothes. *5*I had achieved what I had set out to do. Which sentence could replace sentence 5 to make the paragraph more precise? ~I was able to accomplish the goal I had set for myself. ~I had finally managed to dive from the highest platform. ~I had surprised myself by being able to do what I didn't think I could. ~I truly owed a lot to Coach Wilkerson for all the help he had given me.
~I had surprised myself by being able to do what I didn't think I could.
Read the paragraph from Gordon's personal narrative. *1* When I first entered the room, I was really struck by what I saw. *2* It was my first day of cooking lessons, and I was on my way to fulfilling my dreams of one day becoming a chef in my own world-renowned restaurant. *3* I had spent countless hours of my childhood watching my parents, both professional chefs, prepare savory meals for my sisters and me. *4* From them, I had already obtained a solid foundation of cooking basics. *5* However, it was in this room that I would build upon those basics and begin my ascent as a chef in my own right. Which sentence should Gordon revise to make it more precise, and why? ~Gordon should revise sentence 1 to provide specific details about what "struck" him as he first entered the room. ~Gordon should revise sentence 2 to describe his dreams more clearly and explain what he hopes to accomplish one day. ~Gordon should revise sentence 3 to replace vague words like "countless" and "delicious" with more precise adjectives. ~Gordon should revise sentence 4 to add detailed examples about the many cooking basics he learned from his parents.
~Gordon should revise sentence 1 to provide specific details about what "struck" him as he first entered the room.
Read the excerpt from Spencer's narrative. As we waited for our new football coach to enter the locker room, we all secretly wondered what he would be like. Would he be tough but fair? Would he be demanding but understanding? Would he motivate us before each game with a rousing speech the way Coach Jackson always had? These thoughts were abruptly interrupted when our new coach entered the locker room, stood before us, and commanded our attention. "He" was a "she"! Our new coach was a female? Stunned, my mouth gaping, I barely heard what she said to the team next. How does Spencer's use of chronological order affect the plot of his narrative? ~Readers are able to share in Spencer's surprise at discovering that his new coach is female because this fact is not revealed at the beginning of the story. ~Readers are able to understand the conflict more easily because Spencer reveals what is bothering him at the very beginning of the story. ~Readers do not understand Spencer's surprise because they had no idea what Spencer was thinking before the new football coach arrived. ~Readers do not have to read the entire story because they are now able to predict what will happen once the new football coach speaks to the team.
~Readers are able to share in Spencer's surprise at discovering that his new coach is female because this fact is not revealed at the beginning of the story.
Read the concluding reflection from Kyle's essay. My infatuation with reading, ignited in the sixth grade, significantly changed my life. Ultimately, it was from my sixth-grade teacher that I learned the true power that lies between the covers of a book. It wasn't because she demanded we read or because she encouraged us to read or because she explained why we should read. It was because she opened the doors to reading and invited us into fantastic worlds we had never before experienced. Using books as her compass, she led the way, and all we had to do was follow. To revise his reflection and make a stronger statement, Kyle should more clearly explain __________________________. ~Why his teacher was memorable ~Who affected his life ~How he changed during sixth grade ~What effect reading had on his life
~What effect reading had on his life
Read the sentence from a personal narrative. My grandfather used to spend hours telling me stories I loved to hear. Which best revises the sentence above to make the writing more precise? ~My grandfather always had a lot of stories to tell, and I would always beg to hear them. He would talk for hours, and I did not even notice. I loved these stories, and I loved that my grandfather was willing to spend hours sharing them with me. ~I used to love spending summers with my grandparents on their ranch. We did all sorts of fun things. One of my very favorite parts of those summers was listening to my grandfather tell me the cool stories that I always loved and begged to hear. ~Years ago, my grandfather would spend hours telling me all kinds of stories. I always loved his stories because they were funny and he did a great job telling them. They were about all sorts of subjects, and I thought he was the best and coolest storyteller who had ever lived. ~When I was younger, I would spend entire summers on my grandparents' ranch. Every evening after dinner, Grandpa would tell me stories about what life on the ranch had been like for him when he was my age. I appreciated his stories because they let me get to know Grandpa better.
~When I was younger, I would spend entire summers on my grandparents' ranch. Every evening after dinner, Grandpa would tell me stories about what life on the ranch had been like for him when he was my age. I appreciated his stories because they let me get to know Grandpa better.
Read the paragraph from Lucy's narrative. I could see that my neighbor was struggling with the lone bag of groceries cradled in her arms, but I wasn't sure what I should do. Grandma June—what all the neighborhood kids had called her for as long as I could remember—had always been the one to care for us, to help us build stronger forts, to grow better flowers, and to learn from our mistakes. To ask if she needed help with something as simple as carrying in one bag of groceries would be like shouting to the world that she was aging, that she was no longer as strong as she once had been. Hesitantly, I walked to the wooden gate that divided our front lawn from hers and stood there as the package she was carrying threatened to spill from her arms. Which element of a narrative should Lucy include next to most effectively move the story forward? ~a sentence that clearly establishes who is telling the story ~a reflection that explains what the writer learns from the experience ~a detailed description of the package in Grandma June's arms ~a few lines of dialogue between the writer and Grandma June
~a few lines of dialogue between the writer and Grandma June
Read the paragraph from Nick's personal narrative. Standing alone in my family's barn, I thought about how much hard work and time my parents had invested—how much hard work and time we had all invested—in maintaining a fully operational farm. I did not remember a time when my clothes had not reeked of manure or my hair had not held fast to brittle pieces of straw. What would happen if my parents had to sell the farm so we could move closer to my grandparents? Just as I was attempting to imagine a life in the city, a sudden commotion erupted and interrupted my thoughts. With animals squawking and dust flying, I scrambled to pinpoint the source of this unexpected intrusion. In seconds that felt more like minutes, I was successful . . . and I could scarcely believe what my eyes were seeing. Which element of a personal narrative would be best for Nick to include next? ~a precise description of what the writer is witnessing when he says that he "could scarcely believe what [his] eyes were seeing" ~a line of dialogue in which the narrative's subject shouts, "Oh my! I can't believe what my eyes are seeing!" ~a reflection that includes specific examples of how the experience has changed the writer and an analysis of what made it memorable ~a detailed paragraph that helps to clearly establish the point of view from which the narrative is being told
~a precise description of what the writer is witnessing when he says that he "could scarcely believe what [his] eyes were seeing"
