Exam 4

8. Complete the following: Learn to __________ and _________ to learn.

Learn to listen, and listen to learn

5. Elder Holland quoted Orson F. Whitney. What did Elder Whitney say we are like when we have the Spirit of the Lord? What are we like when we don't have the Spirit of the Lord?

We are optimistic with the spirit, pessimistic without it

11. Describe the Indian talking stick method of resolving conflict.

Whoever has the stick has the floor to talk

2. To the Hebrews, Paul noted two important sacrifices we must be willing to make. What were they?

do good, don't forget to communicate

1. What does the word "helpmeet" mean?

equal partner, someone who completes you

T/F: Most problems with money result from insufficient income

false

10. Name the three councils that should occur in the home.

family, one on one, couple

_____ precedes love and love precedes ____

gratitude precedes love and love precedes progress

4. To women, Sheri Dew suggested that no amount of time in front of a mirror will make you as attractive as ___________.

having the Holy Ghost with you

12. Name two important reasons why we need the Spirit to achieve equal partnership in marriage.

help us know how to make adjustments in ways that please the Lord, recognize the needs of our partner, know how to meet those needs, and desire to do so

11. The Proclamation teaches us that, by divine design, mothers are primarily responsible for _________.

nurturing

What does the Lord teach about the heavens, earth and everything on it? How does he provide for his saints?

"Learn of things in heaven, in the earth and under the earth; things which have been, things which are, things which must shortly come to pass; things which are at home, things which are abroad; the wars and the perplexities of the nations, and the judgments which are on the land; and a knowledge also of countries and of kingdoms" (D&C 88:78-79).

7. What is the higher ground principle?

"you cannot lift another soul until you are standing on higher ground than he is" You help people change by bringing them to Christ

The church handbook teaches 2 benefits of becoming self-reliant. What are they?

-better prepared to endure adversity -better able to care for those in need

Describe the Lord's feelings about debt and how we can get out of it

-pay them off -you will obtain blessings by diligence and faith

Identify 4 characteristics of good emotional and mental health

1. Being at peace with God and yourself. 2. Ability to laugh and have fun and to balance work and play. 3. Flexibility, adaptability, and teachability. 4. Meaning and purpose in life. 5. Good stress management skills.

In a letter sent by the First Presidency to all members of the Church, they outlined 6 basics of family finances. Name them

1. Financial and resource management 2. Literacy and education 3. Career development 4. Social, emotional, and spiritual strength 5. Physical health 6. Home production and storage

4 elements of law of forgiveness

1. Look for the good not the bad in others 2. If we are guilty of saying/doing something that hurts another, we must take responsibility and apologize 3. If someone else does something to hurt/offend us we must be willing to forgive them 4. To be forgiven we must forgive others from the heart

9. What are five ways to foster family connectedness?

1. Spend one-on-one time with children. 2. Express and show love often. 3. Spend time together as a family. 4. Be liberal with praise and generous with forgiveness. 5. Develop family traditions

6. What were the five principles of conflict resolution discussed in class?

1. check your pride at the door 2. change yourself, not your partner 3. develop emotional intelligence 4. distinguish between preference and principle 5. schedule weekly companion inventories

5. Elder Christofferson identified three trends or forces that are weakening and even eliminating the influence of women in the home. What are they?

1. devaluation of motherhood and homemaking as a career 2. sexuality defines worth 3. in the name of equality, women expected to have same attributes as men

Name the 5 basic principles of economic constancy taught by President Tanner

1. pay honest tithing 2. live on less than you earn (save) 3. discipline (needs vs wants) 4. budget 5. be honest

3 keys of effective ministering

1. seek the one 2. act on inspiration 3. nature

10. What are five ways to make "deposits" in an "emotional bank account?"

1. self awareness: recognize and understand how your emotions effect others 2. self regulation: control moods 3. motivation/attitude: desire to change 4. empathy: learn to care and feel about others feelings 5. social skils: connect socially and communicate empathy

The Lord has counseled us to be "more diligent and concerned at home." Elder Bednar offered three suggestions as to how we could to that. Name them.

Express love and show it, bear testimony and live it, be consistent

12. Experts say about ____ of all couple issues will resolve themselves if they are discussed and understood.

70%

2. Eve was told that Adam would "rule" over her? How did Elder Hafen interpret that counsel? What word did President Kimball substitute for the word "rule?"

A ruler can be a measuring tool that sets standards. Being a ruler is not so much a privilege of power as an obligation to practice what a man preaches. In Hebrew it can mean "rule with" Pres Kimball substituted "preside"

When children test family values, it is important to apply the seven word counsel given by Elder Hales.

Act with faith, don't react with fear

3. What can we learn about conflict resolution from the story of Lehi and Sariah in 1 Nephi 5? ACT

Agree Comfort Testify

What is the mission of the Church? Husbands and wives? Parents?

Bring people unto Christ, bring each other and children unto Christ

President Eyring said if we want eternal life, it must be more than our hope. What is it?

Determination

9. How do you know if someone has put God first in their lives?

Everything else falls into place. Our love of the Lord governs all other priorities

5 principles of self-reliance

Faith: without faith you can do nothing -Obedience: keep the commandments -Time management: time to prepare, time to perform our labors, time to prepare for eternity. We need to improve our time, if not no labors can be performed. -Money management: he that is faithful and wise steward shall inherit all things -Work: thou shalt not be idle

5. True or False: Contention is inevitable in all relationships, including marriage and family relationships.

False

7. True or False: In the home, the husband acts as "president" and the wife acts as "vice-president."

False

What did Elder Hales say is the key to strengthening our families?

Having the spirit of the Lord come into our homes

1. How does Proverbs 12:15 describe a foolish person? A wise person?

He that is a fool is right in his own eyes, he that hearken unto counsel is wise

According to Acts 10:38, what was Jesus' daily practice?

He went about doing good and healing all that were oppressed with the devil

President Eyring counseled us to plan for success, not failure. He said planning for failure can make failure more likely and the ideal less so. What specific counsel did he give to young women and young men to help them achieve the ideal?

Plan for the best. Women: Keep in focus an overall goal of exaltation. Men: Provide the necessities of life for your family, choose a degree that allows you to be in the home and you will enjoy it. Don't be so focused on money that you don't spend time at home and with children.

10. The Proclamation teaches us that, by divine design, fathers are primarily responsible for what three things?

Preside, provide, protect

2. In Matthew 18, what two principles are taught about conflict resolution?

Privacy: don't tell everyone else the problem Motive: regain unity

4. What standard did the Lord establish with the Nephites regarding anger and contention?

Satan is the father of contention

11. Complete the following: Seek first to _________, then to be __________.

Seek first to understand, then to be understood

Elder Scott said one of the greatest blessings we can offer to the world is the power of a Christ-centered home where what three things occur?

The gospel is taught, covenants are kept, and love abounds

What two things are true of those who feel no need for mercy?

They never seek it/ they never bestow it

Define: Ministering

To extend friendship, kindness, charity, and service. It is recognizing and attending to the need of others. It is leading and loving by example.

1. How did Paul describe corrupt communication to the Ephesians and Colossians?

anything is not edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers-anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy, lies

8. What is the opposite of love?

apathy

8. Describe Baumrind's four different parenting styles.

authoritative- high warmth, high control coercive (authoritarian)- low warmth, high control permissive- high warmth, low control uninvolved-low warmth, low control

5. Sheri Dew said: "if we are going to build the kingdom of God, we as men and women of God must ___________.

build each other up

9. What is the grapefruit syndrome?

ceaseless pin-pricking

7. Two common approaches to teaching children are cocooning and prearming. What is the difference between the two? Which one has been shown by research to be most effective?

cocooning: sheltering from outside influences (not effective) prearming: teach how to think, reason, problem solve, make good decisions (effective)

7 basic underlying needs of human beings (CRUCIAL)

competence, reconciliation, uncertainty, certainty, independent, acceptance, love

6. Describe the six negative patterns of communication discussed in class. Cool dark coyotes slap innocent monsters

criticism, defensiveness, contempt, stonewalling, intimidation, manipulation

1. Parents should discipline their children according to principles of righteousness. According to D&C 121, what are some of those principles?

kindness, pure knowledge, without hypocrisy or guile, show an increase of love lest he esteem thee to be his enemy

7. In looking at how the Savior communicated with others, we can draw three conclusions about Christlike communication. What are they?

love one another, receive the fullness of Holy Ghost, those things which proceed out of the mouth come from the heart

2. What did President Hunter say is one of the greatest things a father can do for his children?

love their mother

define: divine motive

love; everything God does is due to his love for us

4. What counsel did Elder Holland give parents to help children escape our culture's obsession with comparing, competing, and never feeling they are "enough?"

praise each child individually for what they are

8. When couples are united, what three things do they share in common?

priorities, loyalties, goals

3. Leadership of the family is a man's most important and sacred responsibility. What two things does effective family leadership require?

quantity and quality time

3. What counsel did Elder Holland give to men and women in his talk, "The Tongue of Angels?"

speak kindly; words and deeds to be filled with hope and charity

10. Define effective validation.

take sincere interest in the other person. Listening helps to confirm their thoughts and ideas. Understand and legitimize their feelings. WE must be willing to accept how they feel at that moment

3. Why, did Sheri Dew say, God made men and women alike? Why did he make them different?

to love, we need to unite our strengths and stewardships to create a whole

4. Presiding in righteousness necessitates a shared responsibility between husband and wife. If a man operates independent of or without regard to the feelings and counsel of his wife in governing the family, of what did President Hunter say he is guilty?

unrighteous dominion

6. In class, we discussed four principles that make equal partnership in marriage possible. Name them.

vision, unity, trust, spirit

6. What do the scriptures say is (are) the most important things parents should teach children?

walk righteously before God

In section 83, we are taught about a husband's financial respinsibility to his wife/ex-wife or father's responsibility to his children. How would you describe that responsibility?

women have claim on husbands for maintenance, if they are not found transgressors they shall have fellowship in the church children have claim on parents for maintenance until they are of age

9. In analyzing communication patterns, what percentage of our messages have communication experts attributed to verbal communication, to tone of voice, and to body language?

words: 10 tone of voice: 30 body language: 60