Habit 5 Worksheet

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taking time to listen without judging and without giving advice

"People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care." How does the book say to show you care?

listen, flexible, and trust

The text states that if parents feel you understand them they'll be more willing to _____ to you, they'll be more _____ and they'll _____ you more.

when you're talking about an important or sensitive issue

What is the appropriate time to use mirroring as a communications skill?

listening

What is the basic communication problem in both examples?

speaking in public

What is the greatest fear most people have?

53

What percent of communication is body language?

7

What percent of communication is contained in the words we use?

40

What percent of communication is in the tone or feeling of what is said?

judging, advising, and probing

What three ways does the author say a person could respond when he is listening from his own point of view?

start emotions before someones ready to share

When does probing occur?

the world

Whose needs is this poem talking about?

feedback

Giving ______ is an important part of seeking to be understood.

repeat back in your own words what the other person is saying and feeling

What does mirroring mean?

understood

What does the author say is the deepest need of the human heart?

see the world as they see it

What does the term "stand in their shoes" mean?

seek first to understand, then to be understood

What is Habit 5?

they'll eat your heart out

According to the author, why is it important to express your feelings?

if you use you they will feel attacked

According to the book, why is it important to give feedback in terms of "I" instead of "you"?

mimicking - you repeat what they say mirroring - same idea

How is mirroring different from mimicking?

listening and friend

If you want to improve your relationship with Mom or Dad, try _____ to them, just like you would a _____.

spacing out, pretend listening, selective listening, word listening, and self-centered listening

List the five poor listening styles.

confident, coolness, genuine, spontaneous, kind, encouraged, sensitive, and giving

List the personal traits that the poem says are needed by the person asking for help.

gain a greater respect for them and take time to understand and listen to your parent

List the two things that the author says will happen if you take the time to understand and listen to your parents.

judged and heard

People don't want to be _____ , they want to be ______.

love and understanding

People will open up to you ("expose their soft middles") when they feel genuine ____ and ____.

consideration and courage

Seeking to be understood requires _____________.

not saying

To hear what other people are really saying, you need to listen to what they are _____ _____.

listen

To understand someone you must _____ to them.

listening, reading, writing, and speaking

What are the four primary forms of communication?

listen with your eyes, heart, and ears, stand in their shoes, and practice mirroring

What are the three steps listed for genuine listening?

they treated her the same

What did the three college roommates do to help the anorexic girl?

listen more than you talk

What do you think the message is behind the saying "You have two ears and one mouth - use them accordingly?"

"yeah" and "uh-huh"

What does "pretend listening" mean?

listen and answer

What does "seek first to understand, then to be understood" mean?

pay attention to the only part that interests us

What does "selective listening" mean?

when we see everything from our own point of view

What does "self-centered" mean?

mind in another place

What does "spacing out" mean?

only listen to the words not body language

What does "word listening" mean?

interogated

What is another term that could be used for probing?


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