Heyy

Over the course of my 19 years living I have been sexually taken advantage of a total of 3 times. The 1st time I was 8 years old. My best friend at the time was turning 10 and was starting to explore sex for the first time. Me being even 2 years younger had no intentions of learning about sex. He showed me sexualized magazines and hinted to me that this was what he wanted from me. I was only 8 when he decided to forcefully use me to learn about the pleasures of sex. Being 8, I didn't know how to comprehend what was going on. When he was satisfied, he told me never to tell anyone not even my mom and with him supposedly being my best friend, I listened and did what he said. 2 years past and I am faced with the same situation just a different person. This time I am 10 and it's was at my friend's sleepover

The next morning, I remember feeling so worthless and disgusting. I went home and removed every mirror in my room because I couldn't bear to look at myself anymore. I cried for days on end and isolated myself from everyone who dared get to close. I couldn't fathom the idea of this not only happening once in my life but twice following. I started to think that I was giving off the wrong message to people so I began to change. I changed how I clothed. I stopped wearing shorts and tank tops. I wore jeans all summer for 2 summers straight and I stopped wearing my hair down. I hated any type of attention at all and wouldn't dare hug a soul. Little did I know, I had become the potato.