Interpersonal Communication Final Exam

Examples of Low Stakes

telling a friend you love a gift when you really don't, lying about why you're late, saying 'nice to meet you' when you don't really like someone already.

Grices Maxim: Manner

use words in their semantic meaning and the way most people would understand them, a manner in which people can understand what we are saying, clear, ambiguous and orderly

Types of Deception

Falsification, Exaggeration, Omission, Equivocation

Leech's Maxim: Agreement

Find places that we agree on and focus on those

What is duping delight?

Finding pleasure in being able to control or being able to manipulate someone

Descriptive over Evaluation

"I feel uncomfortable with the way this discussion is going" vs "you are not making yourself clear to me"

provisionality over certainty

"I have usually done it this way, but what ideas do you have?" vs "The only way to get this done is to do it this way"

empathy over neutrality

"I understand it is hard to make time, please do the best you can" vs "I don't care how you do it, just get it done"

problem orientation over control

"I would like to work with you to come up with the best solution" vs "you need to call all your parent's by 4:00 pm Friday"

Strategy over spontaneity

"I'm feeling stressed about finishing this project on time, do you have any ideas?" vs "If you don't have plans for the weekend we really need you to come to the office to help finish this problem."

How did face negotiation needs correlate with apology motivation in Callie's study?

Face was important for women in apology and not the reason that men apologized.

Main topics from the group project?

Allies speaking out for injustice, cell phone rules in relationships, intentional jealousy and love styles, long distance and intimacy, verbal aggression in siblings

High Stakes in Personal Relationships

Cheating on your spouse, lying to your boss. Both could have detrimental consequences to these personal relationships

Variable associated positively with interpersonal communication

Choice

What did we discuss regarding common participants for studies in the group project?

College aged participants

What is conversational implicature?

Context clues, why are people sharing what they're sharing

Negative Face

Desire to appear autonomous

Positive Face

Desire to be liked and appreciated by others

What is the most common form of relational transgression?

Deception because of both high and low stakes

What does the presence (not even use) of cell phones do to satisfaction in an interpersonal encounter?

Decreases the satisfaction of the encounter, limited channels, online can limit in-person maintenance (you no longer rely on seeing each other, you can just talk on the phone about what needs to be talked about)

What are responses to the transgression a transgressor can make?

Denial, justification, acknowledgement, apology, compensate

Leech's Maxim: Sympathy

Emotionally attunes to the other person, key into how the other person feels, being considerate of the other person in the conversation

Different ways that we can terminate relationships, how do they differ?

Gradual vs sudden, unilateral (one sided) vs bilateral (mutual) desire to break up, direct vs indirect termination strategy, rapid vs protracted negotiation over dissolution, Presence vs absence of attempts to reconcile, continuation vs termination of the relationship

What is the definition of technology that we used in class?

Human modification to the natural world -Edward Tenner

What kinds of gating features are important to face to face communications vs online communication?

If you are meeting someone in real life you can't control the way that people see you like you can online, you can think of something really charming to think over text but you have to respond on the spot in person

Interpersonal relationships associations with gratitude

Increases prosocial behavior (reinforcement and reciprocity), associated with feeling connected and in maintaining relationships (social support)

What are other forms of relational transgressions we discussed in class?

Infidelity, Deception, Lack of support/aid, boundary violation

Options for making a "graceful exit"

Introduce a third party, express thanks and briefly explain other needs, summarize conversational take-away and express thanks

Grice's Maxim: Relation

Is what you say relevant to what the other said? Not just saying something out of the blue, make segways in conversation so it's coherant

What is fraud? examples?

Misrepresentation of facts for the sake of material gain. Forging a signature on a document, Impersonating a physician or other licensed professional, insider trading, underreporting your income on tax returns, filing false insurance claims

What methods were discussed for new studies in the group project presentations?

More diverse sample, greater age range, longer sample range

What kind of deception is most sanctioned in personal relationships? Least Sanctioned?

Most: Low-Stakes Least: High-Stakes

Evaluative Feedback

Offering assessment such as providing praise and giving constructive criticism

What is the difference between open-ended and close-ended questions? which is better for conversation?

Open-ended: gives someone opportunities to reply Close ended: only gives people so many options of what to say back Open ended is better for conversation.

Leech's Maxim: Approbation

Praise, build up the other person as being competent and like able in an authentic way

Leech's Maxim: Generosity

Preserving positive face, show that person is more important in the conversation than you are, try to take a one down position, show emphasis and concern in that position.

How do digital technologies affect the initiation of personal relationships?

Proximity (you used to only be able to meet people that you were physically near), Social Disclosure (our social networks are way larger), Disclosure (places like chatrooms where you don't know anyone or see anyone face to face make it easier and more comfortable disclosing information), Gating Features (ways to make yourself look better to people online, only posting really good pics of yourself or pics where it looks like you are having a great time)

What are Grice's conversational Maxims

Quantity, Quality, Relation, Manner

What are potential relational outcomes from a transgression that research has revealed?

Relational Termination, new relational rules, changes to trust/intimacy, renewed commitment

The effect of relational transgression depends on several things - which two did we discuss in class?

Severity of transgression, publicity of transgression

What is obsessive relational intrusion?

Stalking, repeated and unwanted pursuit of someone

What are Leech's Maxims?

Tact, Generosity, Approbation, Modesty, Agreement, Sympathy

What is gratitude?

a positive emotion that typically flows from the perception that one has benefited from the costly, intentional, or voluntary acts of another person

What is communication climate?

The emotional tone of a relationship, it reflects how you feel about the relationship you are in

What is deception?

The knowing and intentional transmission of information to create a belief in the hearer

High-Stake

Those for which the penalties of getting caught are severe

Leech's Maxim: Modesty

Trying to downplay our own positive face, not discussing your own accomplishments, not boasting too much

What does it mean to say most people have a truth bias?

Unless we have reason not to, we tend to believe what other people tell us. So the truth bias means that we tend to assume that what we hear is true. We generally expect our conversations to be pleasant and being lied to is unpleasant so we like to believe that we are being told the truth.

4 ethical systems

Utilitarianism - Bentham (the greatest good for the greatest number) Categorical Imperative - Kant (act only.. that it should become a universal law) Golden Mean - Aristotle, Ethics of Care - Gilligan

What are responses to the transgression a transgressed person can make?

Voice, Loyalty, Neglect, Exit

Leech's Maxim: Tact

We should be as attentive as possible to not impost upon the other person. Also, allowing that person some independence, for example instead of saying "you have to do this" you can say "I know you may be busy but.." in other words: don't be bossy.

Grice's Maxim: Quality

We should be sharing information where we know there is evidence and it is useful, we might have much more to say than fits in the conversation but we should sacrifice some of the quality to meet the quantity

Face Negotiation Theory

We want to protect our identity and the identity of the other's around us

What are the two most common "conversational crutches" and how can we translate them to communicate our values?

Where are you from? What are you majoring in?/What do you do?

Low-Stakes

Where the penalties of getting caught are comparatively mild. These can be called "white lies" often serving to embarrass people or hurt their feelings. These are when the only real penalty for being caught is emotional discomfort.

How do women and men tend to handle conflict differently?

Women: tend and befriend (maintaining harmony) Men: Fight or flight (responding with aggression or avoiding)

Grice's Maxim: Quantity

You should not be talking more than the other person is talking and you should not be giving more information than is needed. Adequate but not overly informative

How can you create conversational threads for someone else to pick up?

ask a question that requires a more open ended response

Psychological associations with gratitude

associated with greater levels of positive affect, associated with mental health (depression, anxiety, body image)

How does deception function as a social lubricant?

by sharing things about our lives while avoiding difficult issues which cannot be discussed

Falsification

communicating false information as though it were true, outright lying. one of the most common ways people deceive others. "I woke up at 6 am" even though you woke up at noon.

What nonverbal behaviors are important for good conversation?

eye contact, body orientation, active listening

How do digital technologies impact the termination of personal relationships?

face issues, one-way vs two-way communication (ghosting), accountability

Physical associations with gratitude

fewer symptoms of physical illness and stress, associated with more exercise and more productive sleep

3 Gratitude Interventions

gratitude contemplation - cognitive intrapersonal (meditation, mindfulness), gratitude contemplation- behavioral intrapersonal (journaling, list making), gratitude expression - spoken statements, written statements (thank you cards, we did in class)

How is gratitude a behavioral choice

gratitude expression

How to tell if someone is engaging in deception?

information inconsistency, increased speech errors, increased vocal pitch, increased blinking and pupil dilation, increased use of fake smiles, decreased body movement

Omission

leaving out parts of a story to create a false impression "I woke up early this morning" making someone thing you were productive but really you were doing the walk of shame

Equivocation

making ambiguous statements to give the false impression that one has said something one hasn't. "I told you what I did this morning" or "This is one of our most popular dishes"

Exaggeration

overstating something that is true in principle "I completely aced my final, 100%" when you probably got an 87%

What verbal behaviors are important for good communication?

positive climate, share information, offer feedback

Sociopragmatic elements of an apology

power configuration (someone in higher power is less likely to apologize than someone in a lower position), Situational Context (what's happening in the transgression? who should apologize if it is necessary?), perceived offense severity (how bad was it?), Obligation (you feel like you have to apologize)

Non-Evaluative Feedback

probing, paraphrasing and offering support. It avoids assessment of what the speaker has said.

3 levels of confirming messages fostering a positive communication climate

recognition, acknowledgment (acknowledging that someone is there and nodding your head), endorsement (all out supporting someone and communicating that you find them important)

How is gratitude emotional?

several scholars define it as a temporary experience that occurs under the conditions and is a multipart process: realization of a positive event that occurred in one's favor and someone/something else is responsible for that event