Interpersonal Effectiveness Chapter 1 A Framework for Interpersonal Skill Development

A Model for Improving Interpersonal Skills

1. Goal or desired state of affairs: "Must be promotable." 2. Assessing reality: "How close am I?" 3. Action plan: "Must choose an improvement method." 4. Feedback on actions: "Have you seen any changes?" 5. Frequent practice: "Must be nice every day."

Formulate Specific Goals:

A goal such as "attain success" is too vague to serve as a guide to daily action. A more useful goal would be to state specifically what you mean by success and when you expect to achieve it. For example, "I want to be the manager of patient services at a large medical clinic by January 1, 2018."

Set Realistic as Well as Stretch Goals:

A realistic goal is one that represents the right amount of challenge for the person pursuing the goal. On the one hand, easy goals are not very motivational; they may not spring you into action. On the other hand, goals that are too far beyond your capabilities may lead to frustration and despair because there is a good chance you will fail to reach them.

action plan

A series of steps to achieve a goal.

developmental need

A specific area in which a person needs to change or improve.

Formulate Concise Goals:

A useful goal can usually be expressed in a short, punchy statement; for example: "Decrease input errors in bank statements so that customer complaints are decreased by 25 percent by September 30 of this year."

Enhancing ethical behavior

Although most workers know right from wrong in their hearts, we can all sharpen our ability to make ethical decisions. By consistently making highly ethical decisions, people can improve their interpersonal relations.

universal training need

An area for improvement common to most people.

Influencing without authority:

An excellent opportunity for practicing influence skills is being forced to influence coworkers, higher management, company outsiders, and other key people over whom you have no formal control.

Group problem solving and decision making

As part of the same movement that emphasizes work teams, organizations now rely heavily on group problem solving. As a consequence, being an above-average contributor to group problem solving is a key part of effective interpersonal relations on the job.

Helping others develop and grow

As power is shared in organizations among managers and individual contributors (nonmanagers) alike, more people are required to help each other develop and grow.

Step 2. Assessing Reality

Ask a few confidants how good you already are in giving recognition. Ask questions such as, "How good have I been in saying thank you?" "When you have done something nice for me, how did I react to you?"

Resolving conflicts with others

Conflict in the workplace is almost inevitable as people compete for limited resources. Effective interpersonal relations are therefore dependent upon knowing how to resolve conflict successfully.

Behaving appropriately when using digital devices

Digital devices are integrated into most facets of our work and personal lives. Knowing how to use various electronic devices and systems, including e-mail, cell phones, and smartphones, in a positive and constructive way instead of being uncivil and unproductive can be a major contributor to building your interpersonal relationships.

Interpersonal communication

Effective communication with people is essential for carrying out more than 50 percent of the work conducted by most professional and managerial workers.

Job search and career-management skills

Finding an outstanding job for yourself, holding onto the job, and moving ahead are not specifically interpersonal skills.

Step 5. Frequent Practice

For this exercise, perhaps you can only practice giving recognition in one or two settings. Yet if this exercise appears promising, you might continue to practice in the future.

Set Goals for Different Time Periods:

Goals are best set for different time periods, such as daily, short range, medium range, and long range.

Stress management and personal productivity

Having your stress under control and having good work habits and time-management skills contributes to relating well to others, even though they are not interpersonal skills themselves. By having your stress under control and being efficient and productive, you are in a better position to relate comfortably to others.

Difficult manager:

If you and your manager have different opinions on how to approach problems, or if your manager has serious shortcomings, you will have to use your best human relations skills to survive.

Proving yourself:

If you feel added pressure to show others that you can deal effectively with responsibilities, you are likely to develop skills in projecting self-confidence and persuading others.

Problems with employees:

If you supervise employees or have coworkers who lack adequate experience, are incompetent, or are poorly motivated, you need to practice skills such as effective listening and conflict resolution in order to work smoothly with them.

Becoming an effective leader

In today's organizations, a large number of people have the opportunity to practice leadership, even if on temporary assignment.

Step 4. Feedback on Actions

Observe carefully how people react to your recognition. Do they smile? Do they shrug off your form of recognition?

Sean's action plan for becoming more tolerant includes the following:

Pausing to attempt to understand why a person is acting the way he or she does. An example is attempting to understand why a sales representative wants to extend credit to a customer with a poor credit rating. Learning to control his own behavior so that he does not make intolerant statements just because he is experiencing pressure. Taking a course in interpersonal skills or human relations. Asking Alison to give him a quick reminder whenever she directly observes or hears of him being intolerant toward customers or workmates.

Guidelines for Goal Setting

State each goal as a positive statement. Formulate specific goals. Formulate concise goals. Set realistic goals as well as stretch goals. Set goals for different time periods.

Applying the Model for Improving Interpersonal Skills

Step 1. Goal or Desired State of Affairs Step 2. Assessing Reality Step 3. Action Plan Step 4. Feedback on Actions Step 5. Frequent Practice

informal learning

The acquisition of knowledge and skills that takes place naturally outside of a structured learning environment.

self-efficacy

The confidence in your ability to carry out a specific task.

Customer service skills

The current emphasis on customer satisfaction dictates that every worker should know how to provide good service to customers. Most people can benefit from strengthening their skills in serving both externaland internal customers. (Internal customers are the people with whom you interact on the job.)

Cross-cultural relations

The modern workplace has greater cultural diversity than ever before. Being able to deal effectively with people from different cultures, from within and outside your own country, is therefore an important requirement for success.

Developing teamwork skills

The most sweeping change in the organization of work in the last 40 years has been a shift to teams and away from traditional departments. Knowing how to be an effective team player therefore enhances your chances for success in the modern organization.

Unfamiliar responsibilities:

The person has to handle responsibilities that are new, very different, or much broader than previous ones.

interpersonal skills training

The teaching of skills for dealing with others so that they can be put into practice

Understanding individual differences

To deal effectively with others in the workplace, it is necessary to recognize that people have different capabilities, needs, and interests.

State Each Goal as a Positive Statement:

To express your goals in positive statements is likely to be more energizing than focusing on the negative. An example of a positive statement would be, "During the next year when I am attending networking events, I will create a positive, professional impression with everybody I meet."

Self-esteem and self-confidence

To function effectively with people in most work and personal situations, people need to feel good about themselves and believe that they can accomplish important tasks. Although self-esteem and self-confidence are essentially attitudes about the self, they also involve skills such as attaining legitimate accomplishments and using positive self-talk.

Specific Developmental Experiences

Unfamiliar responsibilities, Proving yourself, Problems with employees, Influencing without authority, and Difficult manager

Step 3. Action Plan

What are you going to do in the next few weeks to recognize the meritorious behavior of others? Will you be sending thank-you e-mails, text messages, and warmly worded postal cards; offering smiles and handshakes to people who help you; or giving larger-than-usual tips for excellent service with an explanation of why the tip is so large?

Motivating others

Whether you have the title of manager or leader or are working alone, you have to know how to motivate the people who you depend on to get your work accomplished. Given that few people are gifted motivators, most people can profit from skill development in motivation.

Positive political skills

Whether you work in a small or large firm, part of having effective interpersonal relationships is being able to influence others in such a way that your interests are satisfied. Positive political skills help you satisfy your interests without being unethical or devious.

Step 1. Goal or Desired State of Affairs

Your goal here is to learn how to give recognition or to enhance further your skill in giving recognition. You want to recognize others in such a way that they are encouraged to keep up the good work. (Or perhaps you have another related goal.)

Plan for Achieving Effectiveness in Interpersonal Relations

key concepts of human relations + suggestions for implementing + quizzes, exercises, and cases = effectiveness in human relations