EXAM 3 (CH 8-10)
The outcomes of heavy social media can cause
Emotional exhaustion and an array of mental issues
one way to make communicating with an older adult more efficient is to ask many open questions because it is always easy for them to listen and respond quickly
false
Human relationships are dynamic, constantly changing forces that require your continuing attention and nurture
true
Listening can transform the health care experience to create and powerful healing event
true
Powell suggested effective listeners discriminate among cliches, facts, opinions and judgments, and feelings so they can interact with their partners in appropriate and reciprocal ways
true
The moment you begin your career, your listening plays a key role in determining the quality of your work life and the effectiveness of your professional efforts
true
one skill for listening to children is to express frequent, unconditional positive regard
true
one tip for listening in a coaching relationship is to make sure to determine whether you are listening to opinions or facts
true
Rather than listening effectively, school children learn to listen selectively
True
Social media can have devastating effects on self-confidence and self-esteem
True
Texting provides emotional insulation, enabling the communicator to avoid revealing personal feelings and protecting her from the trauma of another per-son's distress.
True
The listening situation will affect the degree which each component of the listening process is relevant.
True
Through listening you get to know this person better at a critical stage in his/hers development ?
True
To ensure respect in the health care relationship, the appropriate exercise of assertive skills and a high level of listening competence are required
True
storytelling enables seniors to feel cared for and connected
True
Goldenberg and his colleagues (2008)
call business in an instant, is accomplished through blogs, wikis, video streaming, podcasts, Skype, and other high-technology tools that facilitate a continuous stream of virtual activity
Level 2: Facts
"Level 2 centers around messages about other people, ideas, and events. Facts are exchanged as you work cooperatively with your part-ner or simply pass time. This type of dialogue does not encourage disclosure, nor does it facilitate the development of a healthier relationship. "
WikiLeaks: Villain or Hero?
(Page 407-408)
· Gender-related listening tendencies have also been identified
- Due to their stronger nonverbal cues and their focus on the relationship aspect of communication, women are often perceived as more empathetic than men by both men and women -Men score better than do women on tests for factual comprehension and recall from lecture material -Borisoff and Merill (1991) suggest that men and women have different listening expectations and needs that may account for their different competencies -Although women are interested in the way their partner is feeling, men often perceive fact-related messages, particularly in the workplace, as more significant
The Challenge of Ethical Listening
- Every communication event has an ethical dimension -Ethical issues focus on value judgements concerning the degree of right and wrong, good and bad, in human conduct -Ethical problems are situations involving choices or dilemmas about the "right" thing to do -In such cases, listening is important whether the ethical situation is confronting you or whether a friend or family member is experiencing the dilemma -As a listener, you can support others as they grapple with issues that have an ethical dimension -Aristotle proposed virtues such as patience, tolerance, and humility that accompany ethical listening -One author proposes that ethical listening means paying complete attention to the other person in order to truly understand their ethical problem and then actively encouraging that person to discuss it with you as they come to some resolution
Where will it lead?
- No one knows for sure -What we do know is that the future will require rethinking the ways in which we "do business", both individually and collectively - When the world is all about managing information, the skills of listening- attending to the right messages, paying attention to context as well as content, critically evaluating information, and making an informed response- will be a strong competitive advantage
Behaviors included such things as listening in to private conversations or using company equipment for personal business
- Technology has created additional ethical dilemmas because it allows for access to information that was unavailable in the past -Companies often use Facebook to learn more about their employees -Imagine the decisions regarding confidentiality that must be made daily by executives in companies that depend on detailed market analysis for their financial success -What mailing lists should not be sold? - What health-related information should be kept confidential?
Nonverbal systems and behavioral norms are learned and vary, sometimes dramatically, from one cultural context to the next
- When two communicators share a good deal of knowledge and experience, it is often unnecessary for them to express their ideas fully and explicitly -These interactions, as you may recall from chapter 6, has been termed highly contexted -Ex) you might sigh heavily as you say to your housemate, "Guess I'll go to Mann and hit the books tonight". Knowing that you have an exam in Asian studies, recalling that you didn't do particularly well on the last quiz, knowing that Mann is a library, understanding that "hit the books" means to study, and recognizing your frustration from the tone of your voice, she would be able to put your message into a fairly rich context to derive its full meaning
intimate distance
- at intimate distances, from physical contact to about 18 inches - conscious of odors and touching is almost unavoidable - large percent of communication is likely to be nonverbal
Nonverbal Dimensions
- degree to which they stimulate participants - degree to which participants feel comfortable - degree to which you feel dominant or in control -space and communication; position affects communication flow, perceptions of status, degree of formality, topic choices
Effective Listening (Response Stage)
- develop behavioral flexibility (increase #/nature of responses available to you) -response should: * facilitate shared meaning * contribute to accomplishing tasks * develop satisfying relationships
Suggestions for Ethical Listening
-It is commonly believed that a failure in ethics is less excusable than an error in performance - This may be because ethics reflects on your character -Ethical communicators are characterized by their discretion and judgment -They ensure that information is relevant and accurate -They time communications appropriately and are fair in making decisions
public distance
- listening situations become more general at public spaces - to get a message across to a number of listeners simultaneously, communicators must use broader gestures - speak more loudly - work harder to maintain a direct rapport - message design is more complicated because listeners are likely to have different backgrounds and different levels of understanding - 12 feet or more of distance - have to work a lot harder to interpret meaning
Supportive Responses
- minimizes defensiveness, encourages objective analysis, problem solving, and healthy relationships * "I" language vs. "You" Language * problem solving vs. Placing blame * Empathy vs. indifference * Provisionalism vs. certainty
personal distance
- most conversations take place at the edges of your "personal bubble" -states generally feel invaded if their partners stand closer than 18 inches, the distance at which individuals from other cultures begin to feel threatened may be as close as 12 inches or as far as 2 feet.
Habitual Response
- results of scripts and schema -works much of the time - problematic *new or difficult situations * when dissatisfied with the way relationships are progressing
Assertive Responses
- skills learned; not always appropriate (situational) - not aggressive.... assertive -"Assertive": straightforward, honest,objective; ideas, opinions and feelings expressed clearly and directly - nonverbal dimension * way you communicate as important as what you say
social distance
- social distances are appropriate for less personal,more formal conversations - At 4-12 feet - may be difficult to feel comfortable sharing personal information - likely to be less emotional content and more information in the messages - small groups of 8 or fewer generally communicate at social distances
Time (Nonverbal Dimensions)
- time of day affects listening - duration of time spent listening can indicate importance or encounter - appropriate timing of communication * mind elsewhere * rushed * distracted
Response Styles
- variety of styles is best (choices) - three response types * assertive response *supportive responses * defensive responses - must be learned and practiced
Another nonverbal element that adds to the perception that women are less confident than men is the pitch and volume of the female voice
-Assertive skill requires forceful delivery -Women tend, because of the size of their vocal cords and larynx, to have a higher pitch -This can put them at a disadvantage, particularly in group settings where perceived credibility is essential -Women's voices tend to be softer than men's -Although volume can be increased with practice, many women do not recognize the importance of their voice in communicating credibility and confidence
Ex) Two employees of Domino's pizza posted clips on YouTube
-At the organizational level, the influence of technology is ever-present -One vividly pictured an employee inserting cheese into his nose and then placing it on a sandwich -The news spread with lightning speed -Dominos recovered by listening carefully and then responding quickly and appropriately -Company took an informal, conversational approach, and chose to communicate in the same digital world that its customers frequented
Types of Assertive Responses
-Broken Record -Negative Inquiry (criticism) - Fogging (criticism) -workable compromise -express feelings verbally
Whether as a member of a family, a school, a club, or a work organization, you act as part of a larger community
-Clampitt (1991) addresses this relationship by identifying three ethical dimensions that he believes constitutes a useful model -An ethical framework, in his words, is created and sustained by "individuals of personal integrity, operating in a culture of principle and governed by conscientious policies" -As a listener, then, you begin by developing your personal ethical framework and behaving in ways that are consistent with your beliefs -If each person acts with integrity, the development of an ethical culture and the implementation of fair practices within that culture are likely to follow
The Challenge of Listening Between Genders
-Communication creates gender, just as it creates other realities -It is through your communication that you learn what it means, within a particular culture, to be male or female -You may have Indian friends, for instance, who grew up with very different assumptions and expectations about their sex role and responsibilities
The Challenge of Listening in High-technology Environments
-Decades ago, we realized that technology would transform the nature of human communication, creating not only a global village but a different sort of world - First Impact: from the radio and television- mass media that continue to have a pervasive influence in most Western cultures -Technology affects your listening behavior, but also in some instances the media may also be listening to you -Ex) Electronic billboards can now monitor radiation leakage from your car antenna and use this information to determine which radio station you are listening to so that billboards might target their advertisements to the most popular stations' demographics
Television's impact on both individuals and culture has long fascinated-and worried- scholars in the field
-Does programming influence attitudes and behavior? -Are young people predisposed to more violent, thoughtless acts after viewing cartoon characters who handle disagreements by clubbing their enemies or watching reality TV shows that celebrate aggressive competitors? -Do young people learn what life is like vicariously through images on the screen in their living room? -For thousands who spend hours online or in front of a TV each week, it may be their primary means of socialization, shaping their perceptions of the world they cannot experience firsthand
In addition to skills in listening comprehension, empathy is also required for effective cross-cultural communication
-Earlier focus on the production or co-creation of meanings is particularly relevant when we consider its implications for creating empathy in diverse environments -We have always assumed that empathy was facilitated by similarities between communicators and hindered or blocked by major differences in values, attitudes, and beliefs -Those with similar backgrounds are thought to have much greater potential for empathic communication than those whose world views are different -The more similar your experiences, the easier it is for you to empathize with someone
Values often associated with Non-U.S. cultures
1. Fate 2. Tradition and stability 3. Being, peace 4. Formality 5. Spiritualism
Because attributing certain characteristics to one gender or another is likely to produce behavior that is based on stereotypes rather than on individual talents and abilities, it is important to develop a culture in which expectations are not linked to gender
-Eliza Doolittle, who was transformed from an uneducated urchin into a well-mannered woman in George Bernard Shaw's Pygmalion (1912) noted, "I'll always be a flower girl to Professor Higgins because he treats me like a flower girl and always will". -Those who treat her like a lady, however, empower her to behave in a more appropriate and productive manner
Suggestions, cont.
-Ethical listeners focus on the purpose at hand and do not consider irrelevant information; they strive for accuracy in understanding and appropriate timing in their encounters -Ethical listeners ask themselves, "would I want this done to me?" -The wisdom of a particular course of action must be judged on the basis of its final impact or outcome as well as on the communicator's motives -Good intentions, in daily interactions, are only half of the picture
Reasoned skepticism is a mental viewpoint, a healthy curiosity that encourages questions and probing
-Ethical listeners prepare themselves for the task of objectively evaluating what they hear by following the principles outlined in chapter 7 - Think of the numerous immature, superficial, and misleading judgements that are made every day by those who have not taken their listening responsibility seriously -Relying on your immediate response or intuition may cause you to distort the intended meaning -Often, it is only by distancing yourself from the emotionalism of the event that you can make wise choices
· Heavy multitaskers develop a sort of technology addiction that makes it difficult to focus on what is important or shut out irrelevant information
-Experts believe that excessive use of the internet can cause individuals to become impulsive, forgetful, impatient, and stressed -Clifford Nass, member of the Stanford University Faculty, explains, technology users often cannot ignore even the slightest hint that something interesting might be going on -"it's like catnip" -People can no longer concentrate on one thing- they can't shut off their multitasking even when they try -The notion that your brain is changing and adapting to the constant stimuli has potentially serious consequences for children -Some researches fear that the heavy digital stimulation will create attention problems for young people who are already struggling to behave in ways that are consistent with their priorities
Value differences affect listening the most fundamental level
-For instance, whereas many people in the United States are speaker-centered, listening is the highest priority in several other cultures -Although the majority of the U.S. population views listening as a passive activity, individuals in other cultures have grown up viewing the listener as highly active and involved -In some Eastern cultures, elements of nature as well as many physical objects are personified so that one listens to the mountains, the flowers, and the snow as well as to human speakers
(referring to differences in language in cross-cultural communication) In such instances, make your reactions to these differences explicit or elaborated so that the person realizes how you are interpreting her behaviors
-If, for instance, you were having a group meeting and one of your members constantly arrives late, you may eventually determine that it is because of her cultural background and perceptions of time -Even though explained, the behavior is still disruptive and has a negative impact on the group -You might therefore determine that the cultural differences in perceptions of time needs to be discussed so that an explicit agreement regarding appropriate behavior can be reached -In other words, when diversity is valued, the group develops its own norm to accommodate the needs of all its members
Bring your biases and stereotypes to the surface
-Ignoring or denying them isn't a solution -When you recognize the bias for your reactions, you will be in a much better position to control your response and work with any insights that develop -As stereotypes fade, and as our perceptions of effective male and female role relationships change, communication between men and women will become increasingly effective
Facebook and Google
-In May of 2011, the world discovered that the leading social networking site, Facebook, was behind a slur campaign against the world's number one search engine, Google -Because Google wanted access to Facebook's "social graph", presumably in anticipation of collecting and using information about the interconnections among individuals without their knowledge or consent for inclusion in its social circles
Recall that cultures themselves can be classified into either high or low context depending upon the extent to which cultural norms prompt individuals to be explicit or indirect in their communications
-In low-context cultures, like the German and Scandinavian, individuals provide a large number of explicit indicators by which to determine the meaning -In high-context cultures, members see such elaborations as a waste of time and depend heavily on individuals' shared experiences to interpret cues in a similar fashion -Examples of high-context cultures include Asian, Arabic, and Latin American -An outsider, has the greatest difficultly when communication indicators are not only foreign but also implicit -The more you are aware you are of culture-related differences, the better able you will be to respond in ways that encourage understanding and goodwill
Effective cross-cultural listeners recognize differences in nonverbal systems and do not make assumptions about what various behaviors mean
-In other words, apply the rules of low-context cultures to be sure that your interpretations are accurate -If someone is late for a meaning, it may be that her perceptions of time are different from yours and that she had no intention of appearing rude or causing hard feelings -If a classmate stands so close that you feel uncomfortable, it's likely because his perception of appropriate distance is very different from yours -Even regulators, used to monitor the flow of conversation, vary from one culture to the next
To a large extent, the media has always served as a cognitive filter
-In selecting news stories and video coverage, reporters have tremendous influence over the public's impression of what is important -No coverage can be completely objective; your impressions of what is important to know and how you should think about what happened are shaped by the media -Newscasters have already filtered and interpreted events before bringing them to you -With little opportunity to discover the original source, the public is often left wondering how closely the media presentation matches the real event, and how many key ideas, however dull, were left on the editing room floor
· listener?
-It means that in order to communicate effectively, men and women both must recognize that there are indeed differences in their verbal and nonverbal behaviors -The stereotypes perceptions we perpetuate, even through our language, color our attitudes and shape our subsequent behavior. -While specific gender differences may vary from one culture to the next, men and women everywhere display sex-linked communication behavior -Although the situation is constantly improving, at this point many women throughout the world still appear to experience, or perceive, a sex-linked disadvantage communicating with men, particularly in the workplace
Because we view listeners as bearing mutual responsibility with their partners for the outcome of communication events, it is only reasonable that listeners share in the ethical responsibility as well
-Lasrson (1989) points to two ways in which, as a listener, you can become a more active participant in the process of ensuring ethical communication -One way is to maintain reasoned skepticism, and the other is to provide the communicator with appropriate feedback
You may also feel overwhelmed by the amount of information available online
-Listening to hundreds of different voices from various sources can be a difficult and stressful task -Realize that you cannot do justice to every message -Remember, again, that just because someone else speaks doesn't mean that you are obligated to listen -Yet, be careful not to be overly selective -Your tendency may be to consider only those messages from the people you trust, or those whom you find easiest to understand -To be fair and objective, you need to expose yourself to a variety of viewpoints and strive not for the easiest, but for the best solution
Analyze your own nonverbal communication cues
-Make sure that your behaviors are appropriate, neither too intimidating nor too timid -Remember that the speaker is responding in large measure to you -Although women may find it beneficial to monitor their nonverbal cues and develop assertive skills, men can encourage women's participation by using more pauses in their speech, interrupting less, and creating supportive environments in which women feel free to speak out
Gender differences in Nonverbal Communication
-Men display a more relaxed posture -Men tend to take up more physical space -Eye contact varies with gender -Women use more facial expressions and emotional displays -Women are more likely to pay attention to nonverbal cues - Women smile more frequently -Men us forceful gestures -Women have softer, higher voices
Nonverbal Differences in Gender Communication
-Nonverbal communication is, to some extent, culturally determined; nevertheless, gender differences in nonverbal behavior are also apparent - In mixed company, women are more likely to look away when speaking and maintain steady eye contact only when listening -Smiling, often interpreted as submissive behavior, is much more typical of women -Women tend to reveal their emotions to a greater extent than men- there is more "leakage" in their facial expressions -Men also appear to touch women more than women touch them and to require more space for their interactions -The sweeping, forceful gestures men use project confidence and assertion, especially when compared to a woman's tendency to use smaller movements and to limit the amount of space she occupies
Gender itself is a significant variable in influencing your perceptions; men and women simply perceive and experience the world in different ways What is responsible for these perceptual differences?
-On explanation might be that, from their earliest years, boy and girls have different social experiences that subsequently influence the way they see and interpret events -Regardless of the culture, virtually without exception, boy and girls are reinforced and recognized for different sorts of behavior
Many researchers are beginning to believe that the constant use of social media and other technologies has a mental cost that affects your ability to listen
-One report suggests that computer users at work change windows or check email and other programs 37 times each hour -The deluge of data many people are exposed to daily creates a condition where individuals begin to crave the simulation, and that juggling all of this incoming - from cell phone calls to instant messages- changes how you think, communicate, and behave
When we move our lens to a more macro level, the concept of cross-cultural communication- individuals from one culture share meanings with individuals from another culture- is dwarfed by the impact of technology and the subsequent globalization that it has facilitated
-Our ability to increase the reach of information worldwide has changed the very nature and scope of communication activity -Rather than taking place in restaurants and living rooms, communication among nations occurs online -Videoconferencing brings experts from throughout the world into the classroom, and interactive, web-based communication serves as a powerful means of creating and sharing information among individuals separated by millions of miles -Researchers suggest that, in addition to magnifying communication differences, technology use itself is also affected by an individual's cultural background
Team dynamics, too, are radically altered by the introduction of technology for group discussion and decision making
-Participants "hear" messages that are no longer connected to specific sources, and status, and personality variables are obscured as participants consider the validity and value of responses that appear anonymously on their computer screens -Although some individuals begin to "speak" more loudly when they cannot be identified, the way in which their ideas and feelings are heard is qualitatively different from the way they are perceived in face-to-face encounters -Trust as a variable in team dynamics has been the subject of much interest by those seeking to facilitate virtual teams -Building trust through distance technologies is complex and challenging -One study found that it takes up to nine months to develop trust when there is no face-to-face contact -In such situations, personal qualities such as extroversion and introversion become particularly pronounces making it difficult to get to know some of the less-active team members
Cultivate a nonsexist vocabulary
-Pay special attention to the language you use to describe gender-linked behavior -Do you say "salesman" or "salesperson" -"fireman" or "firefighter" - "waiter" or "wait staff" - Avoid overreacting to the connotative meanings of the words used - Be sensitive to how your vocabulary and images may be affecting others -Develop sensitivity to the ways in which even common expressions sexualize the conversation: low blow, on target, playing hardball, all elicit images of masculinity
Technology has become not only pervasive but also essential to our daily routines
-Rapid developments in information technology not only make life more pleasurable but continue to redefine the process of communication itself -This new environment is interactive, asynchronous, and rapid -Participants have a high degree of control over the communication process, and those who use the system determine its content -No longer a linear model, communication technologies make it possible to send messages simultaneously, to transmit to any number of receivers, and to access, delete, forward or save information at will
In other situations, where listeners have few shared experiences from which to draw in interpreting messages, communication is low context; in other words, little information is provided by the context and so communicators must be explicit
-Repeating the previous situation, your meaning might only be clear in a low-context situation if you said something like "I haven't been doing well in Asian studies and I have an exam tomorrow. I'm feeling nervous about it so I'm going down to the library to do some studying tonight".
The devices that surround us limit our true engagement with other people
-Some young men and women seek nearly all of their comfort and social support from online sources -It is not unusual to look around a restaurant and see several members of a dinner party looking down at their iPhones, playing games, or sending instant messages -When interpersonal communication is reduced, so is our ability to empathize and understand those around us -In some ways, we are choosing to pay more attention to machines than to the people -Those who study the subject suggest that we are losing the ability to connect in meaningful ways and forgetting the importance of listening -"Are your Facebook friends more interesting than those you have in real life?"
Suggestions for Listening in High-Technology Environments
-Technology is here to stay -Developing the attitudes and skills needed to use the medium effectively is time well spent -Your first task may be to put technology into perspective and to resist the tendency to allow the keypad to replace the majority of your human interactions -Continuously ask yourself if interfacing with your computer and call phone is replacing, rather than supplementing, face-to-face time with your classmates, family, and friends
Suggestions for Effective Cross-Gender Listening
-The behaviors that make it difficult for women to gain credibility and authority in a male-dominated environment can be modified and changed - Communication styles are largely learned and can therefore be replaced by more effective behaviors -Our notions regarding effective leadership are increasingly characterized by behaviors typically associated with women's communication -Those who earn the respect of their collogues and who foster a healthy, productive workplace do so by listening, guiding, mentoring, and coaching -The concept of a leader as an individual with power and control has been replaced by the concept of a leader as one who develops employees and facilitates interaction around key issues -While speaking has been associated with status in the past, listening has become the critical management competence of the twenty-first century
cultural quotient (CQ)
-The concept of cultural intelligence -offers a promising approach to meeting the challenges of intercultural listening -Similar to emotional intelligence, it draws together concepts from studies in psychology, education, and management and addresses issues of individual behavior and motivation -Advocates believe that cultural intelligence can be taught, and those who develop this competence will benefit significantly as individuals in all cultures work to develop a global community
As technology expands our choices and increases the number of messages we encounter, many individuals are confronted with listener fatigue and disorientation
-The dilemma that emerges is whether or not it is ethical to fake attention- to "pretend" to listen -One point of view is that pretending to listen is different from not listening, that, in fact, pretending to listen is a natural part of the listening process -Since no one can listen all of the time to everything that is said-presuming that they wanted to- faking listening is often the only way to stimulate the other person's speaking and to show respect for them -This perspective holds that effective listening does not imply constant listening and that the thoughtful and conscientious selection of when to listen is part of the reality of communication - If this position is accepted, listeners should be encouraged to carefully assess the listening situation to determine the appropriate response -If you disagree with this point of view, it might be useful to engage in further conversation to clarify your thinking
As a listener, there is much you can do to ensure that all communication participants are viewed with equal respect and judged as unique people rather than representatives of their gender
-The first technique is to apply the general semantic principle of indexing -Remember that male manager 1 is not necessarily at all similar to male manager 2 or male manager 3; nor is female manager 1 identical to female manager 2 -Don't make judgements about an individual until you have had an opportunity to meet the person firsthand and observe him or her in a variety of contexts
Technology has the power to deliver vast quantities of information worldwide
-The internet has connected customers, suppliers, and the workforce in ways that dramatically change traditional roles -In this new interactive environment, attention is the most valuable commodity -When bombarded with unrelated messages, how do you know what is important? -How do you know what information to trust? -How do you know who is out there listening to you?
Appropriate feedback is also critical
-The nature of your response affects the outcome of your encounter -Feedback, as you know, can be verbal or nonverbal, oral or written, immediate or delayed -The important element is that it be an honest reflection of your judgement or position so that your partner receives the information he needs to make further decisions -If you sacrifice honesty to avoid an uncomfortable situation or possibly even a conflict, you are making a significant ethical choice -Remaining silent does not disengage you from your ethical responsibility in fact, remaining silent is often in itself a critical ethical decision -Beard (2009) outlines what he believes are several choices we make when listening ethically -One is the choice to listen selectively, to screen out some possibilities and listen attentively to others -The choice not to listen is always an option, as the choice to listen with someone as well as to them
In this new environment, companies need to listen more than ever before in order to know what is being said about their products and services
-Then, they need to understand their audiences so that they can reach those who have voiced their opinions -A thoughtful, rapid response is critical -Customers are listeners waiting to be engaged in virtual exchanges- they want to express their views and be asked their opinions -They expect companies to be authentic and informed, and goodwill is generated through encouraging interactivity and collaboration -The power, as one Web strategist notes, has shifted from the organization to the consumer -Blogs, Facebook, Twitter- social media empowers all people to publicity express their delight as well as frustration about every imaginable experience -Savvy organizations listen to their customers by connecting to their preferred communication channels
In other cases, ethical dilemmas have a more personal and direct impact
-There are numerous situations in which you must determine how to respond to individuals and events -Just because someone is willing to tell you something, does that obligate you to listen? -Clampitt (1991), for one, believes that in the very act of listening you take a moral stand Ethical listeners must consider all aspects of their choices - not only what to listen to, but also to whom, where, and when
Cultural values have a profound impact on what is important to each person, and, subsequently, on what he hears and how that information is interpreted
-There are significant differences in the value cultures place on the importance and nature of work, social events, formal education, and many other activities -While people in the United States tend to believe that they are in control of their affairs, members of other cultures explain many more events in terms of fate -These biases affect decision-making and other key processes, making shared understanding and negotiation even more complicated
Women also qualify statement and use disclaimers more frequently than men
-They are more likely to preface their statements with "I'm not entirely sure but..." or "This probably sounds outrageous, but...". -Although similar qualifiers can be used to encourage a supportive climate in other contexts, qualifiers communicate uncertainty and weaken the communicator's credibility -When making requests or presenting negative information, women appear less confident than men when their statements are indirect or qualified -In addition, women interrupt men less frequently then men interrupt women -In general, both genders appear to listen more carefully to men than to women
Our relational view of communication provides a framework within which to understand how individuals with very dissimilar backgrounds can engage in meaningful, satisfying interactions
-This framework has been called the third-culture concept: The approach suggests that similarities between you and your partner are not essential in order for you to empathize with one another -What is required is a great deal of effort and the willingness to create a third dimension a unique view somewhat different from that held by either of you -When effective, participants in the encounter do not "exchange" or "transmit" messages, but rather co-create meanings through the negotiation of their separate understandings
The trade-offs apparent in a mediated environment are clear: messages become less personal as communicators express their views more directly and more rapidly
-This transition is of concern to many who question the authenticity of constructing relationships through distance mediums -These scholars also question whether the unending need for speed has eliminated important features of conversation, such as the ability to pause, reflect, and ponder -Critics of social media have suggested that we now operate in the context of digital Darwinism where the loudest and most opinionated survive -This change in the way individuals relate to one another has a profound impact on what it means to listen, and the skills involved in creating shared meanings
The Challenge of Global Listening
-To some extent, all interactions involve cross-cultural communication because no two people share the same background and past experiences that shape their perceptions and values -Recall the Sapir-Whorf Hypothesis, which holds that language and thought are intimately related -While the language you use influences the way you frame or think about your experiences, the events and ideas that are valued in your culture are reflected in the vocabulary and structure of language -Whenever communicators' native languages vary, therefore, complications are almost certain to arise in communicating and understanding intended meanings
Verbal Differences in Gender Communication
-Verbally, women's speech is often characterized by elements that create the impression of powerlessness and uncertainty -When they speak women often use "tag questions" -Instead of saying, "That report is due on Wednesday", a woman is likely to say, "That report is due on Wednesday, isn't it?". -This tag projects a lack of confidence and a need to secure agreement and confirmation
Suggestions for Effective Global Listening
-Vocabulary and thought processes differ among cultures, but all languages do not include the same kinds of sounds -Some are characterized by clicks and whistles -At its most basic level, cross-cultural listening requires concentration and focus as you become more familiar with speech patterns of an unfamiliar language -In these instances, discriminative listening is particularly important -Listening in cross-cultural contexts takes greater attention and concentration than it does when interacting with members of your own language community
Voice itself is now produced through technology as computers translate data into sounds with variations in pitch, rhythm, and volume
-Voice-activated software allows users to speak into a computer and to receive a vocal response -These and similar technological advances have created new forms of listening -Marketers, for instance, are using interactive voice-to-voice call centers for remote, real-time contact
Although perceptions of behavior are often confused with actual behavior, the truth is that our perceptions are our reality
-What we believe is what is true - Our beliefs influence our subsequent attitudes and behavior -The fact that our language perpetuates many of these perceived difference between the sexes is troublesome -If you examine the connotative meanings of adjectives used to describe men and women, you will conclude that male and female behaviors are not only different, but that they are associated with power or powerlessness, confidence or uncertainty, competence or ineffectiveness -The words we use influence our judgements and make change difficult at best -In North America, for example, women nag, fuss, or are scatterbrained; they are emotional and tentative -Men remind, complain, are exacting, and are sometimes forgetful, they are confident and firm
Consider too, how technology influences your relationship and your lifestyle
-What would you be doing during those times that you are glued to you iPad? -What activities schedules in relation to particular sports events or programs? -At home, how does the computer affect the interaction among family members? -At school, how does your dependence on technology affect when you eat or study? -Some theorists have even suggested that the traditional functions of family and friends are now being performed by technology- information through online news sources, entertainment through video games, social interaction through Facebook and twitter
-Above all, cross-cultural listening requires patience, kindness, and respect.
-When listening to those who are unfamiliar with your language or your point of view, be willing to make mistakes -The effective cross-cultural listener maintains an attitude of acceptance and open mindedness, listening not only to accomplish a specific task but also to learn and appreciate other ways of seeing the world -Increased awareness and understanding of cultural differences can reduce the level of uncertainty you experience in the communication process -When you are more confident about the communication choices you make, your chances of developing positive relationships and encouraging productive outcomes are increased
Technology has an impact not only on an individual's listening behavior, but on human relationships as well
-When your interaction is with an iPhone or iPad, you can't see you partner's posture or hear the anxiety in her voice -This affective dimension, as you know, is essential to developing trust and creating shared meanings -Messages regarding feelings and values decrease or disappear in high-technology environments -A note left in a computer file cannot compare to a casual conversation over coffee -A number of researchers suggest that interpersonal dimensions have not disappeared, it's just that the very means through which they are developed and maintained has changed dramatically -One of the more radical thoughts is that we are actually bonding to machines as technology becomes the medium through which you and your friends accumulate experience, increase knowledge, and continue human contacts -Even Skype takes on an impersonal quality that discourages meaningful or focused listening behavior
The topics men and women choose to listen to are also different
-While men frequently engage in conversations about sports events, stock market reports, and fishing trips, women are more likely to be discussing relationships, personal experiences, or health-related topics - This gender-based selective attention further distinguishes listening behavior from the two groups -Men tend to engage in other activities while listening, while women are more likely to focus their complete attention on the speaker -Over two-thirds of women in Hite's (1987) study on women and love, when asked what their partner did that created the most frustration for them, responded, "He doesn't listen".
Gender Differences in the Speech of North American Men and Women
-Women use more qualifiers -Women use tag questions -Women speak with an upward inflection -Female voices are higher, softer -Men tend to overlay women's speech -Men interrupt women more than women interrupt men -Men tell stories; women ask questions -The content of women's speech is more personal as women talk about their feelings more readily than do men -Men state ideas more directly -Men use profanity more frequently -Women wait for a sign of interest before continuing
Perhaps the most profound impact of technology on human relationships and human development is its ability to create a truly global community
-You can find a McDonald's restaurant with its golden arches in most parts of the world -Several researchers refer to the "McWorld" effect when technology reduces many variables that have traditionally signaled cultural diversity -Distance technologies applied to education bring students or businesspeople together in real-time, interactive contexts from anywhere in the world -Web-based relationship management is truly global, linking persons from any neighborhood at any time -As our use of technology becomes increasingly pervasive and sophisticated, its implications for globalization and cross-cultural "listening" become one of the most significant realities of the twenty-first century
Suppose, for instance, that you are aware a rumor is circulated about one of your group members
-You know the rumor is unsubstantiated; it was originated and perpetuated by an old girlfriend who has reason to distort the truth -When she stops you after class and whispers, "I have to talk with you about Jason. When can we get together?" What do you say?
The sheer volume of data now available through what some refer to as disruptive technologies makes listening particularly stressful
-Your range of choices increases as data is gathered from all parts of the world and transmitted to your home or office -Human wisdom and insight are increasingly difficult to achieve or recognize -A number of theorists warn that the human factors gap- the difference between the information-processing capacities of humans and the machines they create- results in negative consequences -Exposure to the sheer volume of information, much of which cannot be processed, serves to reduce an individual's listening effectiveness
Lowry and associates (2008)
-emphasize that jobs can be global, but understanding will always remain local
Some critics believe that sex-role stereotyping is introduced to children through fairytales
-in which the woman is typically helpless and beautiful and is saved by a prince who takes control of the situation and rescues her from danger -Although such messages are changing in ways that de-emphasize the role of gender, numerous expectations and myths remain that are largely based on preconceived notions and sex-related stereotypes
In the United States,
-little boys play competitive games in hierarchical groups and tell stories and jokes; girls play games in which everyone gets a turn, and winning and losing are much less important -While girls who are pretty and well-dressed may receive attention, boy are more often rewarded for their athletic accomplishments - Talk among young women establishes connections; listening to young girls and listening to young boys are two very different experiences -Consciously or unconsciously, each gender is provided with different types of stimuli and sent different messages about what is valued or appropriate
In spite of much controversy, there remain many researchers who believe that the technological transformation of the workplace will lead to higher value being placed on interpersonal skills, trust, and relationships
-many people agree that there will always be an important qualitative difference between being "plugged in" and actually connecting -Those who are prepared for the changes that technology brings will enjoy a tremendous advantage in navigating tomorrow's workplace
Nishida (1985)
-proposes that the most effective cross-cultural listeners have a high tolerance for ambiguity -They can see many points of view and remain open-minded when confronted with information that contradicts their previously held beliefs -In fact, each of the principles of clear thinking discussed in chapter 8 is particularly relevant to cross-cultural listening contexts
Skills of listening through social media
1. Conduct and honest assessment of the times you spend on social media sites 2. Make sure that you aren't using social media and texting to avoid difficult interpersonal encounters with family and friends. 3. Seek opportunities to share your feelings with trusted others 4. Provide support to your friends and give them your full attention 5. experiencing emotional exhaustion or stress from social media use, take immediate action to remedy this situation by talking with someone who can help you modify your online habit
What are some ways you can support and older adult who is struggling with memory loss?
1. Consider Psychological factors. (ex. anxiety, depression) 2.
Skills of listening to your partner
1. Determine your level of communication 2. Set aside time to talk when the two of you are alone 3. Work at listening, Give the relationship attention and energy in order to maintain and improve the relationship 4. Be assertive and direct about your needs and feelings 5. Provide positive feedback 6. Accurately understand what your partner means by restating ideas and asking questions. 7. Postpone any discussion until after you have had an opportunity to work off some of the negative feelings that will only block future communication. 8. Use your empathetic listening skills by paraphrasing and reflecting both content and feelings. provide support and be generous with your time.
When listening across department problems are created by:
1. Different perceptions and priorities 2. Different vocabularies 3. Lack of information sharing 4. Competitiveness among departments
The skills of listening to children
1. Follow the rules of constructive feedback. Focus on the child's behavior rather than making judgmental statements about the child himself. 2. Children need to understand consequences. When you listen, try to deter-mine whether the child realizes why a particular action is acceptable or unacceptable, wise or unwise. 3. Do not fake attention, if you can't concentrate let them know 4. Try to avoid giving advice, making evaluations, or criticizing a child unnecessarily. It prevents him from expressing his true thoughts and forces him to constantly monitor what he says in light of your anticipated reactions. 5. Consider nonverbal factors 6. remember a child's mood and situational factors influence him as much as they do adults 7. Find appropriate environments to talk 8. Give them your undivided attention, let him know his ideas thought are valued 9. Express frequent, unconditional positive regard for a child
Skills of listening when being coached
1. Listen carefully for differences in perceptions between your understand-ing of the situation and your coach's understanding. 2. Relax- Do whatever you need to control your mental and physical response 3. Determine whether you are hearing opinions or facts 4. Listen with an open mind 5. If you agree with your coach's criticism, try using the assertive tech-nique of negative inquiry. 6. Interrupt only if you need clarification 7. Make a plan for constructive change 8. Restate any agreements that are made or goals that are set 9. Ask to be evaluated or checked again
Skills of listening to a friend in trouble
1. Make sure you are sincerely willing to help 2. maintain respect and positive regard for the other person 3. Demonstrate calmness and confidence to help reduce your partners anxiety or stress(rusk and Gerner 1972) 4. open with broad statements allowing partner to determine the direction of the conversation 5. Use minimal reinforcers and silence to communicate your interest 6. pay close attention to nonverbal cues 7. make sure nonverbal cues aren't projected as superior 8. Listen for both information and feelings 9. Discuss alternatives 10. Be in a comfortable environment 11. Take your time. get to the bottom of the issue 12. encourage the person to check in with you and make sure the situation is improving
Typical U.S. Values
1. Personal control 2. Change 3. Action, proactive 4. Informality 5. Materialism
Skills of listening to presentations
1. Prepare to listen. Find out as much as you can about the speaker, the topic, and the speech occasion. 2. Meet the speaker, when possible 3. Minimize distractions sit in the front and look at the speaker 4. Determine the speakers purpose 5. Listen for main ideas /facts 6.. Analyse the speakers credibility 7. Analyze the speakers logic and reasoning 8. Analyze use of evidence 9. Focus on speakers meaning 10. Don't be mislead by emotional appeal 11. Listen intentionally to new difficult material
Skills of listening in the classroom
1. Strive to create two- way communication 2. Listen carefully to the responses of your classmates. Comment or ask probing questions 3. Sit where it is easy to listen and participate 4. Think of your instructor as a person with her own interests, prejudices, and beliefs. 5. Share responsibility with the instructor for classroom management
Skills of listening across generations
1. Talking to an elderly may take more time. Ask "closed" rather then "open" questions. or design your queries in either-or format 2. Focus her attention before speaking to her. Ex, say her name 3.Let the older person know she is important 4. Verbalize your feelings, practice your assertive skills 5. Ask questions and take times to be interested in what an older person is doing and thinking 6. provide support
What are three features of the counseling interview
1. Trust and nature of the relationship itself 2. Counselor identifies and assesses the problem while simultaneously encour-aging her client to share his feelings. 3.problem-solving and collaborative and, when effective, it provides a sense of empowerment for the counselee
Among the many dimensions of culture that affect your listening, the following are perhaps most apparent:
1. Values and beliefs 2. Nonverbal systems 3. Behavioral norms
Skills of listening in health care
1. perception check, to confirm your understanding 2.Ask probing questions 3. write down important information so you won't forget 4. Insist that the doctor focus on the interaction when giving you directions or advice. Make sure their is eye contact and they have heard what you said 5. Create a collaborative relationship, health care relationships are two-way
The average family spends how much time communicating face-to-face with their teenager?
15 Minutes
Your relationship with classmates and friends can be either
Casual or intimate
Responses to avoid
Cliches ignoring Advice blaming joking
Minimal response
Does not add substance to the discussion, but demonstrates involvement through such reinforcers as head nods and minimal reinforcers such as "uh huh."
What is the most important factor in maintaining and developing and bond
Effective communication
What type of listening is appropriate when emotions are involved?
Empathic listening
Perseverance
Face-to-face listening forces us to persevere in the exchange even we would rather avoid a confrontation or when we have become bored with the conversation. Social connections on the internet, in contrast, provide multiple escape routes. Contacts online are easily broken, and interactions often fragmented.
"You are always late and it shows how little you care about me and our friendship." This message is an example of the assertive response type 'express feelings verbally'.
False
Aggressive and supportive responses are both deliberate and thoughtful ways of responding.
False
How many Americans over the age of 65 have some form of hearing loss?
Four million Americans
social media and personal relationships
H- U-High R-Medium I-High E-Medium R-medium
Listening to children
H- High U-High R- Moderate I-High E-Low R-
Listening in the classroom
H- High U-High R-High I-Moderate E- Moderate/High R-
listening to employees
H- Moderate U- High R-Moderate I-High E-Moderate/High R-
Listening to your partner and spouse
H- Moderate U-High R-moderate I-High E-Low R-
Listening to a friend in trouble
H- Moderate U-High R-moderate I-High E-Moderate R-
Listening to feedback and evaluation
H-High U-High R-High I-High E-Moderate/High R-
Listen Across Generations
H-High U-High R-Moderate I-High E-low R-
Listening in health care
H-moderate U-High R-High I-Moderate E-High R-
· There is also indisputable difference between men's and women's communication styles that perpetuate this stereotyping
If we compare a woman's communication behavior with a man's, the origin of some of these perceptions becomes apparent
Employees are also confronted with ethical choices in their daily activities
In a recent study conducted by International Communications Research, nearly half of all U.S workers admitted to engaging in at least one unethical act as a result of technology in the workplace
Task orientation
Intent is to gather information
tangential response
Is less helpful. Instead of staying with the subject of concern to the speaker, the listener moves the conversation to a related issue.
· and world views are different from your own, ethical dilemmas will increase
It is never too early to consider your personal values and how you can respond most ethically in a world of conflicting and often competing social and business practices
Different responses
Least supportive, rather than demonstrating interest listener changed the subject
Level 1: Cliches
Level 1 communication, or clichés, constitutes the daily give-and-take situations for which the verbal interaction serves simply to recognize the other person's presence. Ex. Hi, how was your day"
Out of the Four language art skills what was the most neglected
Listening
What is ranked the most critical communication skills in the workplace
Listening
Personal Effectiveness
Mindfulness: discomfort when trying something new - the more responses available, the more likely to select one that communicates understanding effectively and accomplishes purpose - personal style influences * self monitoring
Effective media listeners
Must constantly be aware of the potential influence of electronic communication and make conscious decisions about its use
People with a high social comparison ori-entation use social media more heavily than do those with a low orientation.
True
When can a family member realistically consider the facts at hand, propose solutions, and evaluate the best course of action?
Only after they have had the opportunity to express their true feelings
One author discusses this issue in terms of how social networking has raised ethical concerns about the "virtues" that influence the nature and quality of human relationships
Patience, Fidelity, Tolerance, Perseverance
Relationship orientation
Project concern and empathy
What does every listening relationship require?
Requires slightly different balance of insight, knowledge, and behaviors
Powerful leadership theory
Servant leadership- Depends on listening effectiveness.Servant leaders hold the well-being of followers over their own self-interests and seek to understand their ideas and developmental needs. Servant leadership is strongly correlated with perceptions of trust which, in this case, is defined by the level of confidence employees have in their manager's competence and in the manager's willingness to act in a fair, ethical, and predictable manner.
Same subject response
Response to give when listening to someone with a problem, encourages the flow of conversation on the topic at hand
Listening is the main channel of communication between teachers and students
True
Hulnick (2000)
Suggests, while technology has made it possible for you to do business on the other side of the globe with individuals whom you may never meet, the key point is that "people do business not machines"
Listening responses such as reflecting, confronting, interpreting, and empathizing may be particularly appropriate as the counselor seeks to help her client.
True
Level 4: Feelings
The acceptance of feelings—through empathic listening—is a prereq-uisite for deeper, more meaningful communication and stronger relationships. The healthiest intimate relationships are characterized by reciprocity and a high degree of disclosure and trust. Efforts to articulate feelings bring people closer together
Why is listening to and elderly not always easy?
Their speech is slower paced, Thoughts are less organized, Conversations are redundant, have trouble multitasking, difficulty organizing incoming information, speech process difficulties affect their recall of information
What are two variables that influence patient-doctor relationships and make communication challenging are?
Time and Status
Tolerance
Tolerance is the willingness to be confronted with a variety of ideas, and, on one hand, networking sites expose individuals to this marketplace. On the other hand, however, overly emotional messages and rants characterize many virtual conversations that provide little opportunity for the authentic sharing of perspectives
"As far as I know, the policy is that late work won't be accepted." This message is an example of using provisional language.
True
"in the employee's opinion, listening is one of the most needed management competencies."
True
"listening to stories has a posi-tive effect not only on the storyteller who feels empowered by the experience, but also on the attitudes and understanding of the listener."
True
Ability to hear, understand, interpret, evaluate, and remember what is said depends in large measure on your motivation
True
Continuous listening is essential to nurturing and changing a relationship
True
Fogging is considered an appropriate response type when you are listening to criticism.
True
Heavy social media users believe no one is listening
True
Helping relationship is to provide emotional support and guidance to someone in need of assistance.
True
Leadership is a relationship between leaders and employees
True
Respect technology for what it can do, but recognize its limitations
When you hear that a friend's grandfather has passed away, it's easy to email a quick note of condolence. How does the impact of the electronic message compare with stopping by your friend's table at lunch to share your sympathy?
Patience
While patience has always been viewed as a virtue, especially with regard to effective listening, social networking privileges brevity and a minimalistic approach
Stage 3: opinions and judgement
You and your partner begin to mover towards more open, relational communication. Sprinkled with the facts are glimpses of what your partner thinks about the topics you're discussing. When you demonstrate behavioral empathy, continued sharing is encouraged. If, however, you appear disinterested or critical, communication may quickly move back to an earlier level.
How do you communicate when you feel misjudged, unfairly treated, or unappreciated?
Your begin by influencing your family environment and by practicing listening
The LAW of listening suggests that listening requires ____ and ____.
ability, willingness
Who are often victims of displacement
children
Effective managerial listening increases
employee commitment and employees' self-confidence
Discretion
is the intuitive ability to discern what is and is not intrusive or injurious and to use this understanding and compassion in responding to the day-to-day situations that arise
In what relationship is the most intense emotions expressed that lead to defensive behaviors
relationship in the family
Dodd (1987)
suggests that listening is appropriately identified as cross-cultural when communication outcomes are clearly influenced by cultural differences
Fidelity
the commitments we make to one another suggest that the other person is special. The focus on friend collecting that social networking fosters undermines this fidelity by sacrificing quantity for quality
"The skills related to a technique called appreciative inquiry also rely on listening effectiveness and have a positive impact on corporate culture."
true