Healthy Relationships
Leave it to Chance
Rock,Paper, Scissors or flip a coin.
Laugh it Off
Use humor to decrease the seriousness of the issue.
Passive
When you are timid or wishy-washy n defense of your legitimate rights, needs, and wishes.
Agressive
When you try to achieve your own needs and wishes by overwhelming others, without considering they have needs and wishes, too.
Assertive
When, without infringing the rights, needs and wishes of others, you take steps to ensure that your own rights, needs, and wishes will be respected.
Relationship Rules
1. Respect is essential. 2. You have the right to be heard. 3. Send an adult message to receive an adult response. 4. Avoid communication roadblocks. 5. Make your words, tone of voice, and body language send the same message. 6. Listening is worth being good at.
Quick Fixes
1. Walk Away 2. Skip It 3. Laugh It Off 4. Apologize 5. Split The Difference 6. Leave It To Chance
Judging
Assuming an air of being on a higher level. "That's such a simplistic answer."
Split the Difference
Both sides take equal responsibility.
Name-Calling
Calling someone an insulting name. You're such a sucker for being his friend."
Interrupting
Cutting in with your own comments before someone has finished speaking. "There I was, miles from home and out of gas, when..." "You think that's bad? Listen to what happened to me the other day."
Changing the Subject
Failing to keep to the point of an argument or discussion shows you're not interested in paying attention. "It's been a week since you promised to pay me back. What's the big delay?" "You're so cute when you're angry!"
Blaming or Accusing
Finding someone guilty even before you hear the other side. "It's all your fault we lost the contest!"
Skip It
If the argument isn't worth fighting about then just move on and leave it behind.
Mind-Reading
Jumping to conclusions about what the other person is thinking. "I knew you wouldn't mind if I kept your notes a little longer."
Send an Adult Message
Receive an Adult Response
Insulting
Purposely trying to make someone feel bad. "Those are the ugliest shoes I've ever seen!"
Sweeping Generalization
Putting someone in a defensive position by exaggerating their behavior. Why do you ALWAYS make such a big deal out of everything?"
Send a Child Message
Receive a Parent Response
Apologize
Sincerely say "I'm sorry" for whatever happened.
Walk Away
Step away from the situation if it is getting too heated or angry.
Sarcasm
Suggesting you don't believe the person and saying something designed to one-up or give pain. "Sure, I just love the fact that you're going to the game with my boyfriend."
Threatening
Trying to intimidate someone. "If you do that, I will never speak to you again"