HDFS 145 Guinot - MSU - EXAM 1

Early institution in Native American Families

- children taught implicitly (through observing / shadowing) - children were praised / corrected in public - children worked at a very young age (as soon as they were able) - adult roles modeled for them - girls were women after puberty, and boys were men after their "mission quest"

Commitment according to Sternberg

- consists of two parts, one short term and one long term - short term: refers to your decision that you love someone - long term: commitment represents the long term aspect; it is the maintenance of love

Children in colonial families

- death rates were high - childhood was a short period of time - considered adults at 15-16 (5-6 yo you are able to work) - learned everything within the home that they could learn

Passion according to Sternberg

- elements of romance, attraction, and sexuality in a relationship

Intimacy over time

- when two people first meet, intimacy increases rapidly as we make critical discoveries about each other, ranging from our innermost thoughts to our superficial likes and dislikes - as the relationship continues, the rate of growth decreases then levels off - partners may begin to feel less close to each other, which can mean they are drifting apart, or becoming intimate at a less conscious, more deeper level

What impact did the Great Depression have on marriage and families

- stock market collapsed 1930 - millions of workers lost their jobs - some families lost their homes - young adults delayed marriage/having children - number of desertions increased

Differentiation and what is it NOT?

- the ability to develop and maintain your sense of self, even when you are involved and influenced by someone else - NOT being distant/selfish or putting yourself first - NOT a lack of emotion - NOT breaking ties with your family - does NOT change his or her focus because someone else is more dominant - does NOT lose him or herself when in a significant relationship

Mating gradient

- the tendency for women to marry men of higher status - men tend to marry women slightly below them in age, education, and so on

Intimacy according to Sternberg

- warm, close feelings of bonding you experience when you love someone - includes things such as giving and receiving emotional support to and from your partner - being able to communicate with your partner about intimate things - being able to understand each other - valuing your partners presence in life

Filter Theories

A variety of filter theories suggest that the choice of a partner or spouse is based on a number of different factors that become more or less important as relationships develop, grow, and change

Civil unions

A way same-sex couples could recognize their love, since marriage wasn't allowed - were officially entered - offered the same rights and protections as marriage - had to be officially dissolved if they failed - still couldn't access joint tax benefits that come along with marriage, etc

The likelihood of marriage: A. has declined among women without a high school diploma B. is the same for men regardless of their college education C. has declined for men with a college education D. has declined among college-educated white women

A. has declined among women without a high school diploma

Premarital factors which researchers have found to predict later marital happiness and satisfaction include all of the following EXCEPT: A. number of previous dating relationships B. age at marriage C. length of courtship D. level of education

A. number of previous dating relationships

True or False It is important for a relationship to be fixed in Sternberg's triangular theory of love; not be able to move around

False; your relationship should NOT be fixed and be able to move around and change

Our commitment will remain high as long as we ....

judge the relationship to be succesful

In colonial families, child rearing instructions were geared toward _________

males - EVERYTHING was geared toward males

Bundling

man and women spend the night in bed separated by a wooden board in the middle (colonial families) 30 - 40% of women pregnant during their wedding

Married vs. Cohabiting ________ couples have better problem-solving skills

married

Married vs. Cohabiting _________ couples have less incidence of reported partner abuse

married

Married vs. Cohabiting __________ couples are more likely to be living together long-term

married

Polygyny

men with multiple partners

Serial monogamy

moving on from one person to the next

Objective vs. Subjective

objective: an objective statement or fact subjective: someone's opinion

Monogamy

one partner at a time (only legal option in US)

Why did colonial families/men come to the US?

to escape certain bad situations back home

True or False Marrying for love is a fairly new concept

true

True or False Plymouth colonists prohibited premarital sex

true

True or False marriage hasn't always been licensed by government or sanctioned by religion

true

True or False In colonial families, romantic love was not a factor in choosing a mate

true - 8 out of 13 colonies had laws requiring parental consent - marriage was for maintaining or enhancing political power

Nuclear family

two parents and one or more children

Family of Orientation

were we grow up (may change overtime)

Coverture

wife was legally part of her husband (his property)

Polyandry

woman with multiple partners

How did women get here (to the states)?

women were imported and sold into marriage - this was an effort to promote stability - men did not want to be alone here

Describe the ways in which intimacy can be measured

1. Focus: - what is your focus on? - focus on the relationship, rather than yourself 2. Concern & caring: - putting the other first 3. Extent of commitment to the other: - does one person forsake all others? 4. Communication: - reveal, listen, fight - can we fight without harming the other? 5. Sexuality - mutuality and sharing, rather than just personal satisfaction

Who gave or withheld marriage consent in colonial families?

fathers

In some colonies, women who had inherited property.....

had to marry within a certain amount of time or inheritance would go to the colony

Polygamy

having multiple partners (preferred arrangement worldwide)

In colonial families, if a woman married....

her identity would be subsumed into the identity of her new husband

Mania

- SECONDARY style of love - Coming from the Greek word for "madness", mania is and obsessive love - A combination of ludus and eros - Characterized by an intense love-hate relationship

Commitment over time

- Unlike intimacy and passion, time does not necessarily diminish, erode, or alter commitments - our commitment is most affected by how successful our relationship is - initially, commitment grows more slowly than passion and intimacy

Pragma

- A combination of storge and ludus - Practical, pragmatic style of love - Pragmatic lovers are primarily logical in their approach toward looking for for someone who meets their needs - Look for a partner who has similar backgrounds, characteristics

How does the Family Science Field define "family"

- broader/contemporary/inclusive definition two or more persons related by birth, marriage, adoption, or choice - based on feelings of love

How did World War II influence marriage and families? What impact did this have on the role of women during this time?

- BOOM - dramatic increase in marriage and birth rate - women; wives and teens, went to work (men were gone to war) - propaganda to get women into work grew popular - consequences to family after the war; men wanted to go back to the way it was and women didn't - short supply in housing - divorce doubled in few years after the war

Purpose and function of the engagement system?

- NOT to plan a wedding - to enhance the chances of a successful marriage - to define the goal of this relationship - to think about the realities of life together - to move toward kinship with each others families - to strengthen the couples relationship

Storge

- PRIMARY style of love - Love between companions - Usually begins as a friendship and then gradually deepens into love - Friends before and after - "Love without fever, tumult, or folly"

Ludus

- PRIMARY style of love - Playful or game-playing love - Love is a game, something to play at rather than to become deeply involved in - Love is for fun

Eros

- PRIMARY style of love - Romantic or passionate love - Erotic lovers delight in the tactile, the sensual, and the immediate - Are attracted to beauty (beauty may be in the eye of the beholder)

Passion over time

- Passion may be subject to habituation - what was once thrilling (love, sex), becomes less so when we get more used to it - once we become habituated, more time with a person (or more sex) does not increase our arousal or satisfaction - if the person leaves, we experience withdrawal symptoms (as if we were addicted)

What shifts were seen in marriage and families during the 1950's?

- "Golden age for families" & time of great nostalgia -men took advantage of the GI bill (range of benefits for vets) - major factor in building the middle class - spurred economic growth - racial inequality - economy was stable, jobs were plentiful - men were educated (through the GI bill) --> good pay and benefits - ideal family was typical (common) in 2/3 families - nuclear families: dad supported, they n . owned a home, divorce rate fell, baby boom (46-64)

Agape

- A combination of eros and storge - Altruistic love - Chaste, patient, selfless, and undemanding - Does not expect to be reciprocated

What are the arguments on both sides of the marriage debate?

- have the changes of marriage been positive or negative? positive: - single mothers are more likely to live in poverty - children in married families achieve better on all measures of well being - economic and social advantages to being raised by married parents - furthering your name - promoting worth in society negative: - evidence for retreat of marriage - older age in 1st marriage for both men and women - more and more people are never marrying - significant increase in cohabitation/non-marital births and high levels of divorce - increase of employment for women - smaller gender gaps in wages - wider inequality among men (women have achieved more, it isn't just men now) - persistent economic inequality in racial groups

Stimulus-Role-Value Theory

- how two people come together from beginning to end - A social exchange-based filter theory that depicts what happens between the "magic moment" and the decision to maintain a long-term relationship such as marriage - Includes three stages, if the exchange at each stage seems equitable, the two will progress to the next stage Stimulus stage: - attracted to each other before interaction - making superficial decisions Value stage: - partners weigh each other's basic values, seeking compatibility - agreeing on things are pluses, disagreeing are minuses - depending on the outcome, the couple will disengage or move onto the next stage Role stage: - each person analyzes the other's behaviors, or how the person fulfills his or her roles as lover, companion, friend, worker, and potential husband/wife or mother/father

red flags every relationship should be aware of

- lies or keeps things from you - not nice - only nice to those who "matter" - can't trust - someone who hurts you physically or emotionally - someone you are afraid of in some way - someone who doesn't have any friends except for you - someone who pushes you to do something you don't want to do (especially sex)

Rule of divorce in Native American Families

- male or female could call for divorce (in some tribes), or couple would receive permission from elders

How does pop culture influence our views of marriage and families?

- media is a key source of information/misinformation on marriage and families (images, ideas, values, beliefs, myths, stereotypes) -unrealistic view of marriage and families - many shows minimize the difficulties (friends example) - advice and informational dramas can be the MOST misleading

Rules of marriage in Native American Families

- most practiced monogamy - some had arranged marriages (arranged by father or the tribe) - some had to get approval of their partner choice

Patriarchal systems

- oldest son inherits father's property (social and economic power and influence) - left younger sons with nothing unless the family was extremely wealthy - oldest daughter inherited if there was no sons - sons dependent economically on father for most of adult life - everyone was heavily dependent on the one in charge (father)

Failure to thrive

- regression of development, not hitting the normal milestones - can come from a lack of intimacy - regression of physical development - regression of attachment bonds - regression of social and emotional development

family structure in Native American families

- small families (compared to European settlers) - high infant and child mortality rate (children were put to work early) - mothers breastfed until children were fully weaned (did not have sexual intercourse while breastfeeding --> slowed the family growth)

List the four basic functions of family including subcategories

1. Relationships it provides (support and connection) - intimacy, awareness, support 2. Economic - cooperation, consumption, division of labor 3. Children - production, rearing, socialization 4. Roles - identity, status, values, and expectations

What are some common myths about singles? (9)

1. all singles, especially single women, want to be coupled 2. singles are miserably lonely and envious of coupled friends 3. singles are self-centered and insecure 4. single women will someday regret not marrying, they are alternately unflattering and portrayed as either sexually deprived or promiscuous 5. single men are frequently portrayed as threatening, irresponsible, sexually obsessed, or gay 6. children of single parents are destined to suffer emotionally, socially, academically, financially, and behaviorally 7. single people lack a partner, and therefore lack purpose 8. they will age and die alone 9. married people with families deserve higher pay, special benefits, etc.

Name the ten characteristics of strong families and define them/what they represent/their function

1. commitment - investing in your family - time, energy, patience, compromise - promotes family growth - each member shows/talks about their love for the family 2. respect and trust - for each other's opinions, stuff, talents, and abilities - supporting each other - not taking each other for granted - avoiding criticism - keeping promises 3. positive communication - arguing without actually hurting each other - ability to compromise and make decisions together that are fair for all - ability to figure out and understand others opinions - clearing up understandings 4. morality and honesty - parents teach a moral code - honesty - respect for others - taking responsibility - being tolerant - helping those less fortunate 5. routines, rituals, and traditions - holidays - family celebrations - everyday routines - brings the family closer 6. adaptability and crisis management - perception of the problem and opportunities - decision making and problem solving 7. ability to seek help - a sign of strength, not weakness 8. spending time together 9. wellness orientation - commitment to live their lives in ways that move the family forward 10. meeting each other's needs - parent-to-parent interactions - child-to-child interactions

Characteristics of a successful marriage

1. durability - is it long lasting? 2. commitment - faithfulness/honesty 3. adaptability - compromise 4. fulfillment of needs - psychological - social - sexual - material 5. unselfishness - putting the other first 6. companionship - quality time 7. respect - esteem - support - pride 8. stresses - understanding each others stresses 9. spirituality - covenant - sharing religion

Name the four types of unmarried singles and descriptions of each

1. voluntarily and temporarily unmarried - doesn't want a relationship right now, will in the future -not ready for marriage 2. involuntarily and temporarily unmarried - wants a relationship and is actively seeking - will eventually get married once the right person is found 3. voluntarily and permanently unmarried - doesn't want to be married 4. involuntarily unmarried - just never got married, never found the right person -older in age

For both men and women, which of the following is most positively associated with the likelihood of marriage? A. Careers B. Education C. Geographical origins D. Ability to have children

B. Education

Barriers to marriage for low-income unmarried couples with children include which of the following? A. Correlational inferiority B. Acceptance of divorce C. Financial concerns D. Concerns about relationship with new in-laws

C. Financial concerns

Which of the following statements is true regarding attitudes about marriage? A. More whites believe that marriage is obsolete than blacks or hispanics B. More than 80% of the population believes that marriage is obsolete C. The younger you are, the more likely you are to believe that marriage is obsolete D. The older you are, the more likely you are to believe that marriage is obsolete

C. The younger you are, the more likely you are to believe that marriage is obsolete

An example of the mating gradient is: A. an attractive woman being able to choose a partner from any class or age group B. a young man choosing to marry an older woman C. an attractive, older career woman not being able to find a suitable partner D. a middle-aged widower not being able to find a partner because there are not enough women

C. an attractive, older career woman not being able to find a suitable partner

African American Families Demographic statistics (more/less likely) vs Characteristics

Demographic statistics: - 13% of US population - less likely to be married, more likely to value marriage (being prepared) more likely: - divorced/widowed - bear children outside of marriage - single parent (mostly mothers) Characteristics: - dual earner - importance of kinship bonds: strong emphasis on family loyalties - children are highly valued - likelihood of living in extended households

Asian American Families Demographic statistics vs Characteristics

Demographic statistics: - fastest growing minority in the US after hispanics - 17 million asian american/pacific islanders - 5.6% of US population - diverse population Characteristics: - higher median incomes - higher rates of marriage - higher levels of education - lower rates of child bearing outside of marriage

Hispanic Families Demographic statistics vs Characteristics

Demographic statistics: - 16% of US population - extended kin relationships, cooperation, mutual assistance - La familia: nuclear AND extended family Characteristics: - bilingualism - youngest median age - median family income - considerable diversity

What type of family system did colonial families begin to replicate?

European family systems (patriarchal system)

Value Theory or Role Theory

Gratification follows from finding someone who feels and/or thinks like we do

Name the three components of Sternberg's Theory of Love

Intimacy, passion, and commitment

Single parent family

One parent/individual and children

Binuclear family

Parents maintaining two households

Parental Image Theory

Suggest that we seek partners similar to our opposite sex parent

Complementary Needs Theory

The belief that people select as spouses those whose needs are different from their own

Family of Procreation

The family we create (through marriage and childbearing)

Family of Cohabitation

The family we form through cohabitating

Homogamy

The tendency for people to marry others much like themselves

Halo effect

The tendency to infer positive characteristics or traits based on a persons physical attractiveness Jack is attractive, so I assume he is also intelligent and compassionate before knowing him

True or False: More than half of first marriages result from cohabitation

True

True or False: Parenthood frequently causes couples to evolve into more traditional division of labor roles in their marriage and families

True

True or False: Romantic love is the primary basis for family formation in the United States, as it has been for most of the last two centuries

True

True or False Research shows that shared faith is a protective factor in relationships

True, (but it is not the only variable looked at)

How does the U.S. Census Bureau define "family"?

a group of two or more people (one of whom is the householder) related by birth, marriage, or adoption and residing together; all such people (including subfamily members) are considered as members of one family

Two ways in which intimacy is expressed

expressed physically: - sexual relations - displays of affection expressed emotionally: - sharing ourselves/our feelings with one another

What is intimacy?

closeness between two people

Married vs. Cohabiting ________ couples have poorer communication skills

cohabiting

Married vs. Cohabiting _________ couples have higher rates of child abuse (in families where children are present)

cohabiting

Married vs. Cohabiting __________ couples have a higher break-up rate

cohabiting

What type of families came from the first immigrants to US?

colonial families (men cam first, not families)

Patrilineal

rights and property descended from the fathers (Native American Families)

Matrilineal

rights and property descended from the mother (Native American Families)

Patriarchy

rule is by father or eldest male - colonial families took on this style from European family systems

How many children, on average, did colonial families have?

six children

Parental Image Theory

suggests that we seek partners similar to our opposite-sex parent.

The Duration of Marriage Effect

the accumulation over time of various factors such as unresolved conflicts, poor communication, grievances, role overload, heavy work schedules, and child-rearing responsibilities that might cause marital disenchantment