Social Psych ch 9

agony of loneliness

-feeling of deprivation abt social relations -most likely to occur during times of transition or disruption (ex going to college, divorce) -loneliest grp in american society are those 18-30 yrs old --also lonely when older- stuck @home, can't drive, can't do things used to, etc -we employ various strategies to combat loneliness --ex. get a pet, be active

true/false: men are more likely than women to interpret friendly gestures by the opposite sex in sexual terms

true: men are more likely to interpret friendly interactions w members of opposite sex as sexual come ons

Two stage model of attraction process

*people you meet* -*negative screen of dissimilarity*: dissimilar->avoidance *or* not dissimilar --*positive screen of similarity*: low similarity->indiff *or* high similarity->attraction ---if attraction->continue contact

Shyness (sources and painful consequences)

*sources of shyness* -Inborn personality trait -Learned reaction to failed interactions with others *painful consequences of shyness* -Negative self-evaluations -Expectations of failure in social encounters -Self-blame for social failures -Self-imposed isolation

why are we blinded by beauty?

-Inherently rewarding to be in the company of people who are aesthetically appealing --Possible intrinsic and extrinsic rewards -Tendency to associate physical attractiveness with other desirable qualities --What-is-beautiful-is-good stereotype

Stimulus-value-role theory (murstein)--diff stages

-*Stimulus Stage*: Attraction is sparked by external attributes such as physical appearance -*Value Stage*: Attachment is based on similarity of values and beliefs -*Role Stage*: Commitment is based on the performance of such roles as husband and wife

costs of beauty

-Being good-looking does not guarantee health, happiness, or high self-esteem -Attributional problems with being good-looking: --Is attention and praise one receives due to talent or just good looks? -Pressure to maintain one's appearance--esp in American/Western society and body image --Women are more likely than men to suffer from the "modern mania for slenderness" -being beautiful is mixed blessing --Little relationship between appearance in youth and later happiness

supporting evidence for evolutionary perspective (of finding a mate)

-Desired age: --Men tend to seek younger women --Women tend to desire older men (more supportive and more mature) -Men and women become jealous for different reasons: --Men become most upset by sexual infidelity (women can get preg by other men) --Women feel more threatened by emotional infidelity

is the physical attractiveness stereotype accurate?

-Good-looking ppl do have more friends, better social skills, and a more active sex life --But beauty is not related to objective measures of intelligence, personality, adjustment, or self-esteem -specific nature of the stereotype *depends on* cultural conceptions of what is "good"

mate selection: evolutionary perspective

-Men and women by nature must differ in their optimal mating behaviors --*Women must be highly selective* because they are biologically limited in # of children they can bear and raise in a lifetime --Men can father unlimited # of children and ensure their reproductive success by inseminating many women

how do intimate relationships change?

-Most researchers reject idea that intimate relationships progress through fixed sequence of stages -For reward theories of love, quantity counts -qualitative differences between liking and loving, and diff forms of love

social exchange theory

-People are motivated to maximize benefits and minimize costs in relationships with others -Relationships that provide more rewards and fewer costs will be more satisfying and endure longer -Development of an intimate relationship is associated with the overall level of rewards --benefits: sex, friendship, not alone, practical stuff- taxes, --costs: if partner is constantly negative--> emotionally draining; always fighting, petty, unfaithful

liking others who like us

-People prefer relationships that are psychologically balanced (heider) -state of balance exists when the relationship is characterized by *reciprocity* --Mutual exchange between what one gives and what one receives --want to have equal investment into relationship as partner -Liking is mutual, which is why we tend to like others who indicate that they like us

is beauty a subjective quality?

-Ppl from different cultures enhance their beauty in diff ways -Ideal body shapes vary across cultures, as well as among racial groups within a culture -Standards of beauty change over time -Situational factors can influence judgments of beauty

is beauty an objective quality?

-Some argue that certain faces are inherently more attractive than others --High levels of agreement for facial ratings across ages and cultures --Physical features of the face are reliably associated with judgments of attractiveness --Babies prefer faces considered attractive by adults

perspectives on attraction/ evolutionary perspective

-We are attracted to others w/ whom a relationship is directly or indirectly rewarding -All humans exhibit patterns of attraction and mate selection that favor the conception, birth, and survival of their offspring --*Evolutionary perspective*

pursuing those who are hard to get

-We prefer people who are moderately selective to those who are nonselective or too selective -turned off by those who reject us (ex reciprocity/like others who like us) -psych reactance can incr or decr attraction

mate selection: sociocultural perspective

-Women trade youth and beauty for money because they often lack direct access to economic power -Men are fearful of sexual infidelity because represents a threat to the relationship, not fatherhood issues -diffs typically found bw sexes are small compared to similarities

need to belong

-basic human motive -we care deeply abt what others think of us -those w network of close social ties tend to be happier, healthier, and more satisfied w life than those who are more isolated (harmful to health etc)

equity theory

-most content w a relationship when ration bw benefits and contributions is similar for both partners -ex. (your benefits/your contributions) = (partner's benefits/partner's contributions) -*balance is what counts*

familiarity: proximity effect

-one basic/necessary factor in attraction process -*single best predictor of attraction is physical proximity, or nearness* -where we live influences the friends we make -ex. date a neighbor, friends w ppl you sit next to -ex. college students tend to date those who live either nearby or in the same type of housing as they do

familiarity: mere exposure effect

-one basic/necessary factor in attraction process -familiarity *doesn't* breed contempt -more often we are exposed to a stimulus, the more we come to like that stimulus --(see each other more often)-->more attracted to them -familiarity can infl our self-evaluations

physical attractiveness

-react more favorably to others who are physically attractive than to those who are not -Bias for beauty is pervasive -*incl infants*- infants discriminate bw faces considered attractive and unattractive in their culture

first encounters: types of similarity

-tend to associate w others who are similar to ourselves -four types of similarity are most relevant --demographic --attitude --attractiveness --subjective experience

close/intimate relationships: three basic components

1) Feelings of attachment, affection, and love 2) Fulfillment of psychological needs 3) Interdependence between partners, each of whom has a meaningful influence on the other

familiarity

2 basic/necessary factors in attraction process: -*proximity effect* -*mere exposure*

True/False: when it comes to romantic relationships, opposites attract

False- maybe at first, but ultimately won't last

true/false: People who are physically attractive are happier and have higher self-esteem than those who are unattractive

False-- doesn't say anything abt one's self esteem

True/False: People seek out the company of others, even strangers, in times of stress

True

true/false: after the honeymoon period, there is an overall decline in levels of marital satisfaction

true

Comparison level

avg expected outcome in relationships -investments in relationship incr commitment

true/false: people and groups tend to do worse when they have "do your best" goals than when they have specific goals

true

need for affiliation

desire to establish social contact w others --we are motivated to establish and maintain an optimum balance of social contact -stress incr our need for affiliation --"fearful misery loves company" --"embarrassed misery seeks solitude" --"misery loves company of those in same situation"

Comparison level for alternatives (CLalt)

expectations of what would receive in an alt situation -investments in relationship incr commitment

true/false: infants do not discriminate between faces considered attractive and unattractive in their culture

false

true/false: when faced with the dilemma of whether to act in one's self interest or cooperate w greater good, women are more likely than men to cooperate

false

sternberg's triangular theory of love

intimacy, passion, commitment

true/false: large grps are more likely than small grps to exploit a scarce resource that the members collectively depend on

true -more anonymity/deindividuation

matching hypothesis

ppl tend to become involved romantically w others who are equivalent in their physical attractiveness -matching is predictive of progress in relationship -*possible include positive qualities*

why don't opposites attract

research shows complementarity doesn't influence attractive