Chapter 14

What 4 common parenting myths?

1. a child will save a failing marriage 2. a child gives the parents a second chance to do what they did not achieve before 3. a child will be just like the parents were in childhood 4. parenting is an instinct and requires no training

Friends and lovers tend to have these 3 things in common:

1. attitudes 2. lifestyles 3. values

Individuals with what attachment styles are more likely to be depressed?

1. avoidant 2. anxious

Sternberg identified 3 main components of love?

1. commitment 2. intimacy 3. passion

Consummate love includes:

1. commitment 2. passion 3. intimacy

What 3 factors characterize relationships of securely attached adults?

1. commitment 2. trust 3. longevity

Sternberg's triangle of love consists of passion, intimacy, and commitment; various combinations of these result in what types of love?

1. consummate love 2. fatuous love 3. affectionate love

What 3 factors have lead to a decline in marriage rates in the U.S.?

1. divorce 2. cohabitation 3. fewer remarriages

Gottman found that the following 5 principles determine whether a marriage will work or not:

1. establishing love maps 2. turning toward each other 3. letting your partner influence you 4. overcoming gridlock 5. nurturing fondness and admiration

Single adults face several challenges including:

1. forming intimate relationships with others 2. missed perks in jobs and social prejudices 3. finding a niche in a marriage oriented society 4. confronting loneliness in their lives

Gottman suggested what 2 strategies for remarried couples to cope with living in a stepfamily?

1. have realistic expectations 2. develop new positive relationships within the family

People in happy marriages are less stressed, which puts less wear and tear on a person's body, therefore reducing:

1. high blood pressure 2. heart disease 3. psychological problems

According to Gottman, what 3 actions help couples resolve conflicts?

1. making and receiving "repair attempts" 2. regulating emotions 3. compromising

The fact that U.S. women are having fewer children produces these 3 results:

1. men invest a greater amount of time in fathering 2. parental care is often supplemented by more child care 3. the demands of child care are reduced

What 3 problems can result when one is in love and love is not returned?

1. obsessive thoughts 2. depression 3. sexual dysfunction

What are the 3 benefits of waiting to having children in one's 30s?

1. parents are better-established in careers, with more income 2. parents have had more time to consider their plans and goals 3. parents are more mature

What following 3 aspects have been reported after a romantic breakup?

1. personal growth 2. relational growth 3. environmental changes

Love covers a vast and complex territory of human behavior; what 3 things does a loving relationship include?

1. romantic love 2. affectionate love 3. friendship

Intimacy includes all of the following components: (2)

1. self-disclosure 2. sharing of private thoughts

What are the 3 benefits of being a securely attached individual?

1. self-esteem 2. the ability to control emotions 3. a well-integrated sense of self-acceptance

Research has shown first impressions can detect:

1. sexual orientation 2. romantic interests 3. violent tendencies

What are the 3 advantages of having children in one's 20s?

1. the mother is likely to have fewer health problems 2. parents have more physical energy 3. parents are less likely to build up expectations for their children

What 3 factors contribute to a higher incidence of divorce?

1. youthful marriage 2. low income 3. low educational level

Approximately ... of remarried women bear children within their newly formed union.

50%

Gottman developed ... main principles to determine whether a marriage will work.

7

Which type of love occurs when someone desires to have the other person near and has deep, caring feelings for the person?

Affectionate

... refers to living together in a sexual relationship without being married.

Cohabitation

... asserted that spouses who turn toward each other instead of turning away are likely to have a successful marriage.

Gottman

... found that men and women took six common pathways in exiting divorce.

Hetherington

... education classes can reduce the chances that a relationship will end in divorce.

Premarital

What statement regarding remarriage is false?

Remarriage occurs later for partners who initiated a divorce.

When considering attachment and adult socioemotional development, what statement is true?

Romantic partners can serve as a secure base, just like parents can provide a secure base for children.

Many studies have found that immediate impressions of others can be ...

accurate

Individuals with a ... attachment style demand closeness, are less trusting, and are more emotional, jealous, and possessive in their relationships.

anxious

When individuals are hesitant about getting involved in romantic relationships and when in a relationship, they distance themselves from their partner, they are exhibiting what type of attachment style?

avoidant attachment

A person involved in online dating who fakes their identity is called a ...

catfish

The matching hypothesis explains that we choose someone who is ... our own level of attractiveness.

close to

In Hetherington's research, the ... loners made up only 10% of the divorced group and were "well-adjusted, self-sufficient, and socially skilled."

competent

... validation explains why individuals are attracted to people who are similar to them.

consensual

According to Sternberg ... love is the strongest, fullest form of love and involves all 3 dimensions.

consummate

Which love is the strongest, fullest form of love?

consummate

According to Hetherington's research, the group of divorced individuals known as the ... had problems before divorce, and these problems increased after the divorce.

defeated

A child who has a ... temperament will most likely not be well-adjusted as a young adult.

difficult

The ... are a group of divorced individuals, mostly women, who show a remarkable ability to bounce back from stressful circumstances and create something meaningful out of problems.

enhancers

In 2009, for the first time in history, the proportion of single individuals ages 25 to 34 who had never been married ... those who were married.

exceeded

The ... are a group of divorced individuals described as average people coping with divorce.

good-enoughs

In 2011, the average age for a first marriage was ...

higher than at any point in history

How can ending a close relationship be beneficial?

if it increases one's happiness and personal development

In recent years, the age at which individuals start having children has been ...

increasing

Individuals who exhibit an ... temperament in childhood are more likely to delay entering a stable job track as adults.

inhibited

In relationships, self-disclosure and the sharing of private thoughts are hallmarks on intense closeness, or ...

intimacy

According to Erikson, individuals who are committed to a long-term relationship are in the developmental stage of ...

intimacy vs. isolation

Individuals in early adulthood have to balance:

intimacy/commitment, independence/freedom

When someone fails to develop intimate relationships in early adulthood, Erikson says that this individual is in what stage?

isolation

Compared to other adults, individuals who had an inhibited temperament in childhood are ...

less likely to be assertive

According to Hetherington's research, the group of divorced individuals known as the ... often spent more time in singles bars and had more casual sex than their counterparts.

libertines

A recent study indicated that the ... men were married, the ... their risk was of developing a disease.

longer; lower

What term did Gottman use to describe spouses' personal insights into each other's worlds?

love maps

According to research, couples who cohabitate before marrying experience ... of satisfaction when compared to their counterparts who do not live together before marriage.

lower rates

Compared with men, women have ... close friends and their friendships involve ... self-disclosure and exchange of mutual support.

more; more

According to Gottman, ... occurs when a good marriage is in a conflict and the couple decides to move to a dialogue and remain patient with one another.

overcoming gridlock

Similarity and familiarity are important, but ... attractiveness sparks a romantic relationship.

physical

The legal and social context of marriage creates barrier to breaking up that do not usually exist for ...

same-sex partners

Troy indicates being quite secure in his marital relationship. This feeling of security would indicate Troy was probably a ... attached infant.

secure

The majority of adults prefer to have a ... attached partner.

securely

The ... are a group of individuals who are motivated to find a new mate as soon as possible after divorce.

seekers

Romantic love has strong components of ... and infatuation.

sexuality

According to Gottman, if partners speak candidly and respectfully with each other, they are more likely to create which of the following?

shared meaning

An individual's behavioral style and emotional responses are often referred to together as ...

temperament

T/F: In early adulthood an individual has to balance intimacy and identity.

true

When a person has an easy temperament during childhood, what is most likely to describe their behaviors during young adulthood?

well-adjusted