Critical Thinking Test 3

I don't feel guilty about cheating on my wife. She cheated on me when we were first married.

2 wrongs make a right

Al: Don't throw your money away on psychics. They're nothing but frauds. Jess: You're a fine one to talk! You've spent a fortune on psychics over the years.

look who's talking

After an exhaustive search of his writings and speeches, I've found that Senator Boxwood has never publicly denied that he cheats on his taxes. We can only conclude, therefore, that Senator Boxwood does cheat on his taxes.

appeal to ignorance

ESP has never been disproved. This implies that ESP is a fact.

appeal to ignorance

Of course Saddam Hussein possessed weapons of mass destruction at the time of the second Gulf War. Do you know of any proof he didn't?

appeal to ignorance

Scientists have been searching the heavens for signs of intelligent life for more than twenty years, and so far no trace of intelligent life has been found. Therefore, there probably is no intelligent life in outer space.

appeal to ignorance

Defense attorney to the jury: My client is accused of a serious crime, but he is not guilty. Consider these facts: If you convict my client and send him to prison, his wife will be forced to sell their nice house in the suburbs and his kids will grow up without a father. The conclusion is clear and inescapable: My client is not guilty of the crime he is charged with.

appeal to pity

Look at these pictures of starving children in Africa/>. Look at their swollen bellies, their spindly little arms and legs, their emaciated faces. Next time you go out to a nice restaurant, think of their little hands outstretched to you, begging for a morsel of food. Please, give until it hurts to the Children's Famine Relief Fund.

appeal to pity

Pete Moss is eminently qualified to be the new manager of this store, and it is easy to see why. Pete has five children, his wife has run off and left him with huge debts, and his grandmother died from eating a toadstool. With all these troubles, Pete certainly deserves the job.

appeal to pity

Many leading Native American scholars have argued in favor of affirmative action. However, some of these scholars may have personally benefited from affirmative action policies. Therefore, their arguments should be ignored.

attacking the motive

Madeline Hartstring's new romance novel Flaming Flowers of Desire must be a good book. Everybody at the bridge club is reading it.

bandwagon argument

The death penalty is clearly justified. Polls show that more than 70 percent of Americans support it.

bandwagon argument

Bob is immoral, because he's unethical.

begging the question

Criminals cannot be rehabilitated, because no true criminal can ever be reformed. Once a criminal, always a criminal.

begging the question

Stewart: I have a confession to make. I'm really an angel. Angela: Why should I believe you? Stewart: Would an angel lie to you?

begging the question

Legalizing gay marriage is justifiable, because it's perfectly legitimate and appropriate that people of the same sex should be legally permitted to marry.

begging the questions

My cousin Jed said he once caught a 20-foot-long Tiger shark in a farm pond in Kansas/>/>. Jed's been a little spacey since that mule kicked him in the head, but I've never known him to lie. Must be true.

inappropriate appeal to authoirty

Bill said John's new girlfriend is a fox. Foxes live in the woods. So, John's new girlfriend must live in the woods.

equivocation

Nick "The Enforcer" Napoli/>, owner of the Roadrunner Hotel in Las Vegas/>/>, was recently arrested for bookmaking. Bookmaking is the art of printing and binding books. So, Nick "The Enforcer" Napoli/> was recently arrested for printing and binding books.

equivocation

There are only two ways to get a good grade in Professor Chadwick's Critical Thinking class: cheating and bribery. Since it's pretty tough to cheat on Professor Chadwick's tests, we'd better try bribery.

false alternative

If you don't like apple pie, then you're not a real American. I know you're a real American, So, you must like apple pie.

false alternatives

Joe's criminal behavior is either caused by genetics or it is caused by his disadvantaged upbringing. But Joe's criminal behavior is not caused by genetics, because Joe's identical twin, Pete, hasn't shown any criminal tendencies. Thus, Joe's criminal behavior is caused by his disadvantaged upbringing.

false negative

Bankers are extremely conservative. I know, because my father and uncle were bankers, and they were both staunch conservatives.

hasty generalization

I once hired a fellow from Poland/>/>, and you know, they are a little slow on the uptake.

hasty generalization

I've seen five tigers, and they all were in circuses or zoos. Therefore, probably all tigers are in circuses or zoos.

hasty generalization

Professor Rumpley's theory about the location of the lost continent of Atlantis is undoubtedly true. Just last week Shirley MacLaine, the famous actress, announced her support for the theory.

inappropriate appeal to authority

Socialism is the wave of the future. How do I know? I read it in the People's Daily, China/>/>'s largest state-run newspaper

inappropriate appeal to authority

All life is precious. Hence, since it's wrong to deliberately take a human life, abortion is wrong. In fact, anyone who obtains or performs an abortion should be executed as a murderer.

inconsistency

My office assistant quit because she said I made unreasonable demands. But I didn't make any unreasonable demands. I simply asked that she pick up my dry cleaning, baby-sit my kids for free, and give me back rubs twice a day.

inconsistency

Parent: Are you still going out with that jerk Jerry? Daughter: Yes. Parent: Well, at least you admit he's a jerk.

loaded question

Why do you always have to ruin everybody's fun?

loaded question

Democrats have charged President Bush with failing to keep his campaign promises. But this is just a case of the pot calling the kettle black. Just last week, for example, many Democratic senators went back on their campaign promises to support term limitations for members of Congress. Thus, the Democrats' argument is no good.

look who's talking

Art Nerdlich has been convicted of three counts of embezzlement, two counts of corrupting a minor, and five counts of cruelty to animals. The conclusion is obvious: Nerdlich should not be appointed as Principal of Middletown Elementary School.

no fallacy

I asked ten people at random in this small town which restaurant serves the best chicken-fried steaks, and all ten said the Rustler's Inn/>. Therefore, probably the Rustler's Inn/> does serve the best chicken-fried steaks in this town.

no fallacy

I read in Time magazine that scientists have recently discovered several large planets floating through interstellar space, unattached to any star. Since Time is a generally a reliable source of news and information, this story is probably true.

no fallacy

My opponent in this election doesn't deserve your vote. He's a liar, a confessed child molester, and he's twice been convicted of spying for China

no fallacy

Teacher: Bobby, I've listened to your arguments why you think you deserve a better grade on your science project, and I've explained to you as clearly and as thoroughly as I can why I think the grade I gave you was fair. Now drop it. If you persist in haggling for a better grade, I'm going to send you to the Principal's office.

no fallacy

I'm sure you're all aware that Paula Zapperstein has argued that we need a new school gymnasium. What you may not be aware of is that Ms. Zapperstein is a convicted drug dealer. Clearly, Ms. Zapperstein's argument should be consigned to the trash bin.

personal attack

Between 1975 and 2000, many Americans began to drink diet soft drinks. During that same twenty-year period, average life expectancy increased significantly. This proves that diet soft drinks help people live longer.

questionable cause

I won $600 in Vegas last week. I told you that lucky rabbit's foot works.

questionable cause

There are far more male mathematics professors than there are female mathematics professors. Clearly, gender discrimination continues to be a major problem in higher education.

questionable cause

Tom the Barber: I'm convinced that being married for 30 years or longer causes hair to grow out of men's ears. I've never had a male customer who's been married for 30 years or longer who didn't have hair growing out of his ears.

questionable cause

Some people argue that fishing is wrong because fish can suffer. But fishing is a wonderful sport. Kids love it, and there's nothing more relaxing.

red herring

The Auto Advisor column of the newspaper says that the Ford Taurus is an excellent car. But that cannot be true. Ford Motor Company executives make millions of dollars in salaries and bonuses every year. Nobody deserves to be paid that much. Simple fairness requires that people should be paid according to the amount of work they do; and none of those executives does any more work than the average worker on the assembly line.

red herring

Environmentalist: Clear-cutting timber, as your company does, causes lasting environmental damage and it scars the land for decades. Logger: If I were you, I'd be careful about spreading those kind of lies around here. A lot of my buddies don't take kindly to environmentalists, and they're not as civilized as I am.

scare tactics

President to Special Prosecutor: Mr. Special Prosecutor, I'm sure you'll agree these charges against me are completely groundless. If you continue to aggressively pursue this investigation, it may be necessary to order the IRS to audit your tax returns.

scare tactics

Never attempt to eat just one Crispy & Salty brand potato chip. Once you eat one, you just can't stop. Before you know it, you'll eat the whole bag--maybe even two or three bags.

slippery slope

Student: I know the paper is due today, but I wonder if I could get an extension. I was in a car accident and was in a coma for the past two weeks. In fact, I just came out of the coma last night. Professor: I'm sorry, but I cannot grant your request. If I gave you an extension, I would be obliged to give extensions to students with weaker excuses than yours. Pretty soon, I would have to give extensions to all my students, and my paper deadlines would be meaningless.

slippery slope

Some parents have argued that we should offer bilingual education in English and Spanish at all elementary schools in south Texas/>/>. This request will have to be denied. If we offer classes in Spanish, next we'll have to offer classes in Chinese for the benefit of our Chinese-speaking students. After that, it will be French and German. Eventually, we'll have to offer classes in Norwegian, Arabic, and Swahili. Expenses for all these bilingual programs will bankrupt the school district.

slippery slopw

Clyde: Children in our society should be given greater freedom in making their own decisions, at least in many cases. Nestor: I disagree strongly, Unlike you, I do not believe children should be deprived of all parental guidance and given free rein to make their own decisions, no matter how harmful or dangerous.

straw man

Harry has argued that occasional marijuana use is less harmful to your health than cigarette smoking. But it's just wrong to suggest that smoking marijuana isn't unhealthy. Many scientific studies have shown, for example, that smoking marijuana use can cause cancer and long-term memory loss.

straw man

Klaus: People should be aware that most of the items served in fast-food restaurants contain large amounts of fat, sodium, or sugar, which are unhealthful when consumed in excess. Opie: You sound like one of the Lifestyle Police. People like you want to turn us all into celery-munching, meat-hating, power-walking, vitamin- popping zombies.

straw man

Professor Woodson has argued that America/>/>'s health care system is unjust and should be reformed. It is regrettable that Professor Woodson finds it necessary to advocate socialism. Socialism has failed everywhere it has been tried. Such a view is utterly indefensible.

straw man

Schlepp: Modern technology has done much to improve the lot of most Americans. For example, it has greatly reduced the amount of mindless drudgery that people once had to endure. Schmuck: Poppycock! Modern technology has not made us all rich, and it has not made us all happy.

straw man

Students have argued that we should offer a greater variety of food services in the Student Union. These students can't be serious. Do they expect us to open an Olive Garden or Red Lobster in the Student Union? Such a proposal is ridiculous!

straw man

Apple juice is am amber-colored beverage, and it tastes great. Beer is an amber-colored beverage, and it tastes great. Gasoline is an amber-colored beverage. Therefore, it probably tastes great, too.

weak analogy

I saw where they canceled today's tennis tournament because of rain. They play football in the rain. Why not tennis?

weak analogy

In golf, there's nothing wrong with taking a mulligan (i.e., a do-over shot) if you hit a bad tee shot on the first tee. Similarly, there's nothing wrong with getting an abortion if you discover that the child is not going to be of the desired sex.

weak analogy

Many people claim that smoking marijuana often leads to the use of more dangerous drugs like cocaine or heroin. But this argument is ridiculous. That's like arguing that drinking milk causes alcoholism, because most alcoholics started out by drinking milk.

weak analogy

Last month, Mac the Knife cut someone with a knife, and he was thrown in jail. Last week, Sam the Slasher cut someone with a knife, and he was thrown in jail. Yesterday, Dr. Emma Gallstone, the distinguished heart surgeon, cut someone with a knife. Therefore, Dr. Gallstone will probably be thrown in jail too.

weak analogy/equivocation