Soci final

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Violence in Dating & Live-Together Relationships

1. Causes of dating violence 2. Unwanted sex, including date rape 3. Different experiences of men & women a. Men b. Women 4. Violence in opposite-sex cohabiting relationships 5. Violence in gay & lesbian relationships 6. Stalking: The abuse after abusive relationships end

Personal Factors Associated with Divorce

1. Communication problems: "She/he doesn't know me" 2. Infidelity: "He/she has broken my trust" 3. Constant conflict: "We never get along" 4. Emotional abuse: "She/he doesn't treat me well" 5. Falling out of love: "My perspective changed" 6. Unsatisfactory sex: "The thrill is gone" 7. Insufficient income: "There's never any money" 8. Physical abuse: "He/she beats me up!" 9. Falling in love with someone else: "This is the person I should have married!" 10. Boredom: "It was just the same old, same old"

Young Parents: Teen Pregnancies

1. Difficulties for the parent Teens have babies because they are poor Vast majority of teen mothers unmarried 2. Difficulties for the child born prematurely and are low birthweight, raising likelihood of infant death, blindness, deafness, chronic respiratory problems, etc Chilren 50% more likely to repeat a grade More likely to live in povery and suffer higher rates of abuse and neglect Sons of young mother more likely to end up in prison 13%

Some Predictable Stressors of the Family Life Cycle

1. The beginning phase: The stresses of newly marrieds 2. The childrearing phase: Stresses with children Sandwich generation - between taking care of their children and of their won aging parents 3. The middle-age phase: The empty nest—or not 4. The aging phase: Stresses of health & financial worries income typically declines between 30 to 50 percent on retirement Median income for seniors ages 65 to 74 was 36,0000 Over age 74 it drops to 35,000 12 percent of people ages 65 and older are living at the poverty leve Nursing home or death of the spouse

Traditional Families: Good-Provider Husband, Homemaker Wife

1. The good-provider role: Traditional "man's work" 2. The homemaker role: Traditional "woman's work" 3. "Mr. Mom" as the exception: Men as full-time homemakers Just 5.4% of married couples in 2009 had a husband who didnt work and a wife who did

Remarriage & redivorce: Is dissolution more likely the next time around?

15% of remarriages dissolved after three years and almost a quarter after five years

Co-Provider Families: Husbands & Wives as Economic Partners

1. Working women 20% of all women in 1900 to 67.2% in 2013 Women more likely than men to work part time 24% of all employed women are voluntary part time workers, compared with 13.1% of men Working mothers in 2012 - 47% said they would rather work part time a. The glass ceiling b. The mommy track Offers women flexibility but compels them to surrender ambition

The Rights of Children

1989 convention of rights of the child, adopted by united nations general assembly after a decade of discussions. Been ratified in 192 countries only two have not ratified it: THe United States and SOmalia

Practical Action: Choosing Good Daycare: Help for Working Parents

C. Strategy #1: Mentally Separate Work & Home Roles D. Strategy #2: Use Positive Self-Talk to Replace Negative Thoughts E. Strategy# 3: Develop Good Time-Management & Task-Delegation Skills F. Strategy #4: Employ Customized Work Arrangements Scale Down Your Career At Least for Awhile Take Other Forms of Time Off

Good versus Bad Stressors

Eustress: stress caused by a positive event, the eustressor (p. 421). Eustressor: a positive event that is the source of stress (p. 421). Distress: stress caused by a negative event, the distressor (p. 421). Distressor: a negative event that is the source of stress (p. 421). Stressor overload: unrelated but unrelenting small stressors that can produce a breakdown in a person's or a family's morale (p. 421).

. Toward Becoming a Hardy Person

Hardiness: combination of three personality traits—commitment, control, and challenge—that protects us from the potentially harmful effects of stressful situations and reduces our chances of developing illness (p. 394). 1. Commitment High self esteem, enthusiasm and a sense of purpose in their lives 2. Control People who have the belief they can control or influence events in their lives accept responsibility for their actions and make changes in harmful behaviors 3. Challenge See them as challenges, or as stimulating opportunities for personal growth rather than threats. Less likely to die of heart disease

The rich get richer, the poor get poorer, the middle class loses ground

High class: 43.3% to 50% Median: 17 to 14% 25.5% of African Americans lived in poverty compared with 10% of non hispanic whites and 24.7% of Hispanics

The Good Divorce

How parents divorce more important than the divorce itself

Divorced parents: Does being from a split family encourage divorce in children's marriages?

Increases the likelihood of you getting divorce

Pregnancy & children: Does having children before or after marriage affect risk of divorce?

a. Pregnancy before marriage Women with children prior to marriage at higher risk of divorce b. Existence of children during marriage Keep spouses together or postpone divorce Presence of teenagers makes separation and divorce more likely

The community divorce: "So long, in-laws; good-bye, common friends"

a. Relations with relatives from the marriage b. Relations with friends from the marriage

Annulment: Marriage is declared to have never been valid

a. Religious annulment Catholic church does not recgonize divorce, but does recgonize annulment, which in essence declares that a marriage never existed. More than half annulments granted by the church worldwide go to cahtoics in United States b. Civil annulment Granted by state civil court, delcares that the marriage was not valid, returns property to respective partners and allows both to remarry. State sanctioned annulments occur with marriages in which children are involved

How grandparents interact with their grandchildren: Cherlin & Furstenberg's three styles

a. Remote—"I see my grandchildren only every two to three months or so" b. Companionate—"I see my grandchildren about once a week or more" c. Involved—"I see my grandchildren every day"

Working mothers

a. The captives—"I'd rather be a homemaker, but I have to work" b. The conflicted—"If the job conflicts with my family, I'll quit" c. The copers—"I'll work if the job lets me cope with my family demands" d. The committed—"I'm committed to both my career and my family"

How grandparents interact with their grandchildren: Neugarten & Weinstein's five types

a. The distant figure—"I don't see my grandchildren much" b. The formal grandparent—"I'm a grandparent, not a parent" c. The reservoir of family wisdom—"I know what's good for these kids" d. The fun seeker—"These little tykes are my pals" e. The surrogate parent—"I'm having to raise my kid's kids"

The economic divorce: "I'm afraid I won't have enough to live on, & I dread losing things I've become attached to"

a. Threat of declining living standards b. Disputes over who gets what c. Loss of favorite things

Some Unpredictable Stressors

a. Who are the unemployed? i. Unemployed workers Unemployed workers: those seeking work who are new to the labor force or have been laid off (temporarily dismissed), downsized (permanently dismissed), or fired (dismissed for cause, such as absenteeism) (p. 397). ii. Discouraged workers Discouraged workers: those who have given up looking for work and have simply dropped out of the labor force (p. 398). What is a recession for whites can be a depression for blacks, whose unemployment rate is nearly twice that of whites iii. Underemployed workers Underemployed workers: workers who hold jobs below their level of qualification or are working part time but want to work full time (p. 398). The stress of being unemployed or underemployed i. More conflict and problems Middle class falling behind financially and death rates among white, mimddle aged Americans from addictions amd mental illness issues ii. Change in family roles and routines

Adjusting to Parenting 1. Transition to parenthood

a. You can't undo parenthood b. Parenting is an immediate "24/7" job c. Unrealistic expectations can lead to disillusionment d. There is no instruction manual for parenting e. Parenting changes the couple's relationship f. "I no longer think about myself the same way" g. "My partner and I are really having to adjust" h. "My parents and I are having to adjust our relationship" i. "My employer and my friends and I are having to adjust"

Living together: Are former cohabitors more likely to divorce?

higher rates of marital separation and divorce

Numbers That Matter: Separation & Divorce

. Married men who are fired have an 18% greater chance of being divorced within the next three years, and married women have a 13% higher chance, according to one study 2. Skin color doesn't cause divorce, but race and ethnicity are often associated with other factors, such as education and income level, that may be predictors of divorce. Blacks generally have higher divorce rates than whites because they are disproportionately poor. However, as income levels rise, divorce rates for blacks decrease, resembling those for whites 3. One study found that in 47% of divorces, the leading cause of the breakup was incompatibility, or basic personality differences, and another cause was alcohol or substance abuse problems (for 24% of women and 6% of men) 4. One study found that 40% of divorcing wives lost half their family income, compared with 17% of men. Among Latinos, married and divorced men had essentially equal incomes, but divorced women's incomes dropped about 24%. African American divorced women are especially at risk economically because of differences in male and female incomes

Practical Action: Toxic Parents & Transcenders: How Do Some People Survive Abusive Parents?

1. "Toxic parents": There is a difference between discipline and abuse 2. Transcenders: Even abused children can turn out all right

Minority Parents

1. African American parents Homeschool their children a. The working poor and underclass Unable to direct children or influence behavior Point to themseves as models of what not to be b. The working class and middle class Parents emphasize conformity, obedience, good behavior and respect for authority 2. Hispanic parents Now the largest minority group, Hispancs tend to stress authority of the father, demand that children respect parents and insist that older children set positive example for their younger siblings 3. Asian American parents authority of family, encourage respect and obdeience to parents, discourage expressions of individuality and aggression strong believers in education success 4. Native American parents Sense of family, tribal unity, discple them with persuasion and nonverbal behavior rather than physical punishment Supress aggression and be independent

Three Parenting Approaches

1. Authoritarian childrearing: "Do what's expected because I said so!" Working class parents Cold and unsupportive, discourage verbal give and take Children moody less cheerful 2. Permissive childrearing: "Do what's expected because you want to do it" Warm and reasonable More in middle class families 3. Authoritative childrearing: "You know what's expected; it's up to you" strict and trolling, warm and supportive

A Sense of Perspective: Parents Aren't the Only Influences on Their Children

1. Biology & heredity 2. The social environment 3. Siblings & relatives 4. Teachers & friends 5. The mass media Children who watch tv higher blood pressure than those who watch less Babies under 2 - no screens Children over 2- no more than one to two hours a day in 2015, first rule no valid

Working Parents

1. Career-parenting conflict Concerned about absence of childrens lidfes Women spend less time with their children than 40 years ago 2. Family-oriented workplace policies page 333 3. Childcare services page 333 4. Making time for children page 333

The cycle of violence: Three phases

a. Phase 1—rising tension b. Phase 2—escalation and explosion c. Phase 3—calmness, contrition, and kindness

How Work Has Changed

1. From work & family to families in the workforce Least amount of hours - Germany United States (18) - towards the bottom, Ireland Portugal Korea and Mexico were last US workers have fewest vacation days in the industrialized world - given 15 days off but take only 14 Legal rights Most: Austria Least: United States 2. More working hours, less leisure 3. Noncash benefits: Alternative community welfare 36 million Americans have no health care

The Continuing Search for Happiness: Are Our Expectations for Intimacy Too High?

1. High hopes a. Somewhere there is a soul mate for each of us b. If we love each other enough, we can overcome all problems c. A marriage partner should be everything—best friend, terrific sex partner, sympathetic confidante, good provider d. A "normal" family is a close-knit unit consisting of father, mother, and children plus close relatives e. Perfect families are "always there for us," providing love and solidarity, nurturing, and support

The Health & Economic Status of Children

1. High mortality rate for babies 7.9 million children worldwide are borth with birth defects caused by least partly genetic flaw 70% could be prevented Number of infant morality rate- children who die before 1 year of age per 1,000 live births Infant mortality rates Monaco, Japan, Norway, Bermuda, Signapore, Sweden, Canada, United States (highest, ranked 46) 2. Premature births & low birthweights Rates rose 10.6 percent 3. Childhood poverty 22$ of all children living in the US are below poverty line Poorr families in 2013 were black, american indian, hispanic 55 percent of children of immigrant parents live in low income families 4. Why are so many American children suffering? Biggest reason for deplorable state of Amierca's children is economics. 18 percent of american women had minimal or no prenatal care, higher than the rate in any other rich nation

Numbers That Matter: Working Families

1. In many countries, health, retirement, and similar benefits are government programs, but in the United States, they are usually offered by employers. Indeed, whereas in 1929 only 1.4% of U.S. employee compensation consisted of benefits rather than cash, by 2015, they accounted for 30.7% 2. In 2014, the top fifth income-earning households took in 50% of the total U.S. aggregate income, up from 43.3% in 1976. The middle fifth saw their share of aggregate income decline from 17.1% to 14.8%. And the share for the poorest fifth of households slipped from 4.4% to 3.3% 3. The percentage of women in the workforce grew from being 20% of all women in 1900 to 57.2% in 2013

Economic Changes Affecting the Family Today

1. Long-term inflation & the decline in purchasing power Hourly income went from 25.00 an hour to 3.23 four and a half decades earlier Inflation - not the same amount of buying power Minimum hourly rates goes from 25 cents to 7.25 2. The two-tier labor market: The bottom half slips behind 3. Poverty a. Who's below the poverty line? b. Poverty and race/ethnicity c. The feminization of poverty Poverty rates higher for single females than married couples d. The consequences of being poor Life expectancy - 89 to 92 Life expectancy for low-income 76 to 78

Practical Action: How Do You Know If Someone Is Likely to Attempt Suicide?

1. Look for changes in mood and habit 2. Look for changes in life events 3. Beware of previous attempts 4. Talkers may be doers 5. Warnings versus no warnings

Five Parenting Styles

1. Martyr: "There's nothing I wouldn't do for my kids" Spoil kids 2. Pal: "My kids & I are buddies because I want them to like me" Want children to like them 3. Police officer: "If my kids don't obey me, they get punished" Children might revolt, insisting on more independence 4. Teacher-counselor: "I want to positively shape every part of my children's lives" 5. Athletic coach: "I want to encourage my children to do well within a framework of family rules"

Example of the Pain of Children: How Can Parents Help Them Adjust to Divorce?

1. Tell the children about the divorce 2. Understand that children feel guilty about the separation and hope for a reunion 3. Recognize the child's strong emotions 4. Don't put the child in the middle, and be clear about family boundaries 5. Parents should attend to their own anger and guilt

Example of the Effects of Unemployment: Coping with the Spiral of Stress

1. Working is tough enough—80% of Americans feel stressed by at least one thing on the job, according to a recent survey 2. Being unemployed—or even underemployed—is one of the most severe problems one can encounter, and it can have an enormous effect on family relations

Psychological Stress Reactions

1. Number, kind, & magnitude of stressors in your life Too many can make you ill Most stressful - death of a spouse, divorce, a jail term, marriage and sex difficulties to (least stressful) change of sleeping habits, vacation, christmas, and minor violations of the law 2. Your emotional predisposition & self-esteem In part learned behavior 3. Your resilience Resilience: the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress; "bouncing back" from difficult experiences (p. 394). Vulnerability: psychological or environmental difficulties that make children more at risk for developing later personality, behavioral, or social problems (p. 394). a. Positive temperament Resilient children may be born with a genetic inclination toward being socially responsive to their caregivers, so they receive more attention b. Substitute caregiver Resilient children have a loving caregiver or mentor whose social skills they can imititate and who can substitute for an indifferent parent c. Social support Resilient children receive a support and trust from caregivers and other children and learn positive social skill

Numbers That Matter: Crises & Violence

1. One study of a national sample of U.S. adults found that 23% of husbands and 12% of wives said that they had had sex with someone else sometime during their marriage 2. In 2013, 9.4% of Americans age 12 or older had used illicit drugs in the month before the survey interview. The drug most commonly found in employee samples was marijuana 3. The lifetime prevalence of rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner is 43.8% for lesbians and 61.1% for bisexual women, compared to 35% for heterosexual women. The figure is 26% for gay men and 37.3% for bisexual men, compared with 29% for heterosexual men 4. In 2009, about 10.1 of every 1,000 children were victims of abuse or neglect

Customized Work Arrangements

1. Parents work alternate shifts 2. One parent is self-employed 3. One or both parents use a flexible workplace program a. Part-time work—Less than 40 hours b. Flextime—Flexible working hours c. Compressed workweek—40 hours in four days d. Job sharing—Two coworkers split the same job e. Telecommuting and other work-at-home schedules

Elder Abuse & Neglect

1. Person in new relationship turns out to be abusive 2. Late-onset domestic violence 3. Domestic violence grown old

How to Be an Effective Parent

1. Positive reinforcement: Predictability, praise, & love 2. Instilling values & a sense of responsibility 3. Practicing good communication 4. Avoiding physical punishment Corporal punishment - lots of families do it Most children welfare professionals think spanking is harmful to children and leads to aggressive behavior

Adjusting to Pregnancy & Childbirth

1. Pregnancy: The mother's story 2. Pregnancy: The father's story Men may feel physical symptoms of pregnancy May overexercise or overeat They may feel read based off stability of the relationship or goals they had set earlier in life 3. After the baby is born: Postpartum adjustment a. Bonding b. Postpartum blues c. Postpartum depression

Financial Effects

1. Property settlements: Are "equal" & "equitable" the same? a. Property divided equally, not equitably b. Property divided equitably, not equally 2. Spousal support & the "alimony myth": Are better arrangements possible? a. Ignorance about actual alimony awards b. Confusion of "spousal" with "child" support c. Media reports about wealthy divorces 3. Child support: How well does the system work? a. Not every custodial parent gets child support b. Payments vary by race/ethnicity and education Black : 4,524 Hispanic: 4,634 White: 5,194 Non high school: 3,000+ High school: 5,000+ Some college: 4,000+ (almost 5,000) Associates: 4,000+ (More than some college, less than high school) Bachelors: 6,000_ c. Many men don't provide support 50% dont d. Noncustodial parents are more apt to pay when they are involved with their children

Practical Action: Alternatives to the Courtroom: Rent-a-Judge, Divorce Mediation, & Collaborative Divorce

1. Rent-a-judge: Quicker, cheaper third-party help 2. Divorce mediation: Other third-party help a. Better communication, reduced conflict, increased cooperation b. Savings in money and time c. More privacy 3. Collaborative divorce: No third party C. Divorce Mediation & Collaborative Divorce

Defense Mechanisms

1. Repression 2. Denial 3. Rationalization 4. Displacement 5. Projection 6. Reaction formation 7. Regression 8. Sublimation

When Major Role Disruptions Occur: Overload, Conflict, & Ambiguity

1. Role conflict: "Different people want me to do different things!" 2. Role overload: "I can't do what they expect of me!" 3. Role ambiguity: "I don't know what people want me to do!" 4. How some people reduce role disruptions Unmarried women without children experience less difficulty about defining their roles, and they are more likely to be employed full time to be farther along their careers than married women are Men are able to reduce role disruptions by trying to work part time or on different shifts from their partners Men seemed to be able to do this by putting their family roles head of their work roles and being equally comitted to work and family

Parental Transitions

1. Role reversal: Taking care of Mom & Dad a. Helping one's parents while helping oneself b. Being realistic about Social Security Page 349 incase this is important

A. Emotional, Psychological, & Physical Effects

1. Separation distress: Depression, anger, & anxiety 2. Loneliness & feelings of being stigmatized 3. Stress 4. Health problems 5. Positive effects 6. Interaction with ex-spouse

Nontraditional Parents: Single Fathers, Relatives, & LGBTs

1. Single fathers 2. Grandparents & other relatives 3. LGBT parents

Strategy #5: Take Other Forms of Time Off

1. Take unpaid time off 2. Take personal time off 3. Use sick days for family reasons 4. Take children to work

Effects of child abuse

a. Physical and mental problems b. Emotional and developmental problems c. Intimacy problems

The Effect of Divorce on Children

1. The short-term consequences a. Unwanted split b. Guilt, anger, depression, anxiety, and withdrawal c. Less social and school competence d. Health problems 2. The long-term consequences a. Wallerstein's pessimistic view Children entered adulthood worried self deprecating and angry b. Hetherington's more optimistic view Increased resilience, adapt to change, c. Why do Wallerstein's and Hetherington's Findings Differ?

Example of a Crisis: A Loving Marriage Won't Prevent Infidelity: The Lessons of Shirley Glass

1. The workplace is the new meeting place 2. Being a loving partner won't prevent infidelity 3. In the "new infidelity," affairs don't have to involve sexual contact 4. A cheating spouse doesn't always leave clues that the faithful spouse could detect 5. If an affair is discovered, talking about it will not necessarily create more upset 6. Divorcing the old spouse and marrying the conspirator in the affair does not lead to eternal bliss

Numbers That Matter: Parenting

1. Today 22% of all children in the United States—16 million children—live in families with incomes below the poverty line of $23,550 a year for a family of four (Land 2013) 2. Although the U.S. teen pregnancy rate reached a 30-year low in 2010, down 51% from its peak in 1990, that was still the highest in the developed world outside former Soviet Bloc countries 3. Among parents who divorce, the mother winds up with custody of the children 90% of the time. Only 17% of children in divorced families have at least weekly visits with the noncustodial parent, usually the father, and more than half have no direct contact 4. The average family pays about 7% of its family income for childcare. Among parents below the poverty level, however, the costs are 30%, over four times more 5. Among children 19 to 35 months, frequent parental use of discipline strategies ranges from 26% using spanking, 65% taking away toy or treat, 67% yelling, 70% using time-out, and 90% providing explanations

Examples of Two New Kinds of Parent-Child Arrangements: A Pair of Fathers, a Son Never Officially Adopted

1. Two gay fathers, with one happy to stay home Page 332 2. A nonbiological son & the concept of "equitable adoption"

Stress & Stressors

1. Types of stressors: Hassles versus crises a. Hassles Hassles: frustrating irritants (p. 393). b. Crises Crisis: an especially strong source of stress; a crucial change in the course of events that requires changes in people's normal patterns of behavior (p. 393).

. Single Parents: Unmarried & Divorced

1. Unmarried parents 60S AND 70S fasting growth in percentage of nonmarital birthas among 15 to 19 year olds in 2013, 72% of all births to black women, 66% of american indian or alaskan native women, 53% to hispanic women occured outside of marriage, compared to 29% of white women 17% asian or pacific islander 2. Divorced parents Married adults now divorce two and a half times as often as adults did 20 years ago and four times as often as they did 50 years ago 2-3% END IN DIVORCE IN ANY Particular year Between 40-60% if new marriages will eventually end in divorce a. Divorced mothers Dont do as well financially compared to divorced husbands Twice as high (31.8% compared to 16.2) b. Divorced fathers Used to be that they become less involved in kids life One survey - 17% have atleast one weekly visit Other data suggest between 15-25% of noncustodial fathers maintain weekly visits even several years afterwords and is growing

Practical Action: Choosing Good Daycare: Help for Working Parents

1. Visit the daycare center—preferably unannounced and more than once 2. Observe the children's and staff members' demeanor 3. Observe whether the environment is adequate and the curriculum stimulating 4. Ask what the staff-to-child ratio is 5. Ask what the rate of staff turnover is 6. Ask about staff training 7. Ask about references

Violence between Husband & Wife

1. What is the incidence of marital violence? a. Some violent incident—one of six b. Verbal assaults—three-fourths c. Physical abuse—12% d. Severe wife beating—30% e. Victims of intimate violence—76% are females

Trends in Divorce

1. What is the most useful measure of divorce? a. Raw numbers—Not useful b. Crude divorce rate—Also not very useful c. Refined divorce rate—Most useful Refined divorce rate: number of divorces in a given year for every 1,000 married women over age 15 (p. 440). 2. Today's divorce rates 2006-2010 probability of first marriage lasting 10 years was 68% for women and 70% men. Lowered to 52% for women and 56% for men US divorce rate highest of those among industrialized nations Median length of marriage until divorce is 11 years

The Unequal Distribution of Income & Wealth

1. Which economic class are you a member of? a. The capitalist class, 1%—Incomes of $2 million-plus, mostly from assets b. The upper middle class, 14%—Incomes of $150,000-plus c. The middle class, 30%—Incomes of about $70,000 d. The working class, 30%—Incomes of about $40,000 e. The working poor, 13%—Incomes of about $25,000 f. The underclass, 12%—Incomes below $15,000

Grandparenthood

1. Why grandparents like being grandparents—& the benefits they offer a. Historian Provides cultural and family history 0 sense of community and belonging b. Mentor Provides guidance in ways of living as in helping mothers care for their infants c. Role model d. Wizard Fascinating stories of times past and excites thie child's imagination e. Nurturer/great parent

Chapter 13 key terms

Acquaintance rape: nonconsensual sex between adults who know each other (p. 410). Acute: physical or mental disorders that are of short duration (p. 405). Adaptation: not changing a stressor or the stress (p. 422). Alcoholism: a form of substance dependence, defined as a chronic, progressive, and potentially fatal disease characterized by a growing compulsion to drink (p. 402). Altruistic egoism: process of cooperation in which you help others satisfy their needs and they in turn help you satisfy yours (p. 424). Anorexia nervosa: self-starvation, resulting from a distorted body self-image that leads to the conviction that one is grossly overweight (p. 403). Anxiety disorders: four common mental disorders: generalized anxiety disorders, panic attacks, phobias, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (p. 403). Battering: see "physical violence" (p. 409). Bulimia: eating disorder that consists of episodes of binge eating alternating with purging (p. 404). Child abuse: acts of aggression by an adult against a child (p. 417). Child neglect: includes physical neglect (not providing a child with enough food, clothing, healthcare, or security) and emotional neglect (failing to provide sufficient care, attention, and guidance) (p. 417). Chronic: physical disorders that are of long duration or are recurring (p. 405). Common couple violence: violence between partners arising from everyday disagreements that have gone too far (p. 413). Coping: changing a stressor or changing your reaction to it (p. 422). Coping strategies: generally realistic and helpful ways of dealing with stress, pain, fear, and other problems caused by stressors (p. 422). Crisis: an especially strong source of stress; a crucial change in the course of events that requires changes in people's normal patterns of behavior (p. 393). Cybersex affair: affair in which a person has a secret online relationship with someone in an Internet chatroom (p. 399). Cycle of violence: three-phase cycle characterized by (1) rising tension, (2) escalation and explosion of violence, and (3) calmness, contrition, and kindness following the violent episode (p. 413). Date rape: nonconsensual sex between dating partners (p. 410). Defense mechanism: unconscious methods for denying, excusing, disguising, or changing the behaviors that cause anxiety and frustration (p. 421). Denial: refusing to believe information that provokes anxiety (p. 421). Discouraged workers: those who have given up looking for work and have simply dropped out of the labor force (p. 398). Displacement: redirection of one's feelings from the true target to a less threatening substitute (p. 422). Distress: stress caused by a negative event, the distressor (p. 421). Distressor: a negative event that is the source of stress (p. 421). Drug abuse: use of a drug in violation of legal restrictions or for other nonmedical reasons; also called substance abuse (p. 401). Drugs: chemical substances other than those required for the maintenance of normal health, such as food (p. 401). Eating disorders: disorders such as anorexia (self-starvation) and bulimia (binge-eating) (p. 403). Elder abuse: any form of mistreatment that results in harm or loss to an older person, including physical abuse, sexual abuse, domestic violence, psychological abuse, financial abuse, and neglect (p. 419). Elder neglect: acts of omission in the care and treatment of the elderly (p. 419). Emotional abuse: see "emotional violence" (p. 409). Emotional neglect: not providing sufficient care, attention, and guidance (p. 417). Emotional violence: verbal and psychological abuse that inflicts or threatens to inflict emotional distress; also called emotional abuse (p. 409). Eustress: stress caused by a positive event, the eustressor (p. 421). Eustressor: a positive event that is the source of stress (p. 421). External stressors: stressors that begin with someone or something outside the family (p. 395). Extrafamilial abuse: sexual child abuse by nonrelated individuals (p. 419). Granny dumping: abandoning an older adult at a hospital entrance with no identification (p. 420). Hardiness: combination of three personality traits—commitment, control, and challenge—that protects us from the potentially harmful effects of stressful situations and reduces our chances of developing illness (p. 394). Hassles: frustrating irritants (p. 393). Hedonistic affairs: affairs as acts of playfulness (p. 399). Incest: sexual relations between persons who are related to each other (p. 417). Infidelity: marital unfaithfulness—usually considered sexual contact outside the marriage or primary relationship; also called extramarital sex, adultery, having an affair, or "cheating" (p. 398). Internal stressors: stressors that begin inside the family (p. 395). Intimacy reduction affairs: affairs by a spouse who feels uncomfortable with too much closeness in his or her marriage (p. 399). Intimate partner violence: physical and/or emotional abuse of one partner by another—male or female, married or unmarried, straight or gay, current or former (p. 412). Intrafamilial abuse: sexual child abuse by related individuals (p. 419). Learned helplessness: feeling of helplessness by people who perceive that, because of their battering experiences, they have no control over the major events affecting them (p. 415). Marital rape: forcible rape by one's spouse (p. 414). Marriage maintenance affairs: affairs that provide something missing from the marriage (p. 399). Mental disorders: psychiatric illnesses or diseases manifested by breakdowns in the adaptational process and expressed primarily as abnormalities of thought, feeling, and behavior, producing either distress or impairment of function (p. 403). Miscarriage: natural expulsion of a fetus from the uterus before birth; also called spontaneous abortion (p. 407). Mood disorders: mental disorders usually characterized by periods of depression, sometimes alternating with periods of elevated mood (p. 403). Patriarchal terrorism: violence by men who feel that they must control "their" women by any means necessary (p. 413). Physical neglect: not providing enough food, clothing, healthcare, or security (p. 417). Physical violence: infliction or threat of physical harm; also called battering (p. 409). Projection: attributing unacceptable impulses or characteristics to other people (p. 422). Protection order: court order that prohibits a person from threatening, harassing, or hurting a victim (p. 416). Rape: unwanted sexual penetration, perpetrated by force or threat of harm, or occurring when the victim is intoxicated or unconscious (p. 410). Rationalization: assertion that the reasons for illogical behavior are "rational" and "good" (p. 422). Reaction formation: people presenting themselves as feeling the opposite of what they really feel (p. 422). Reactive affairs: affairs by partners who are seeking reassurance about their youthfulness and sexuality (p. 399). Reframing: redefining the meaning of a situation as a way to change your perspective on it (p. 423). Regression: relapsing into a more childlike or juvenile form of behavior to "avoid" the threat of the moment (p. 422). Repression: "motivated forgetting," the unconscious blocking of whatever is causing one's stress (p. 421). Resilience: the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress; "bouncing back" from difficult experiences (p. 394). Sexual abuse: manipulated or coerced sexual behavior of a minor by an adult (p. 417). Sexual assault: legal term for rape (p. 409). Spillover: effect of participation in one of life's domains (such as work) on other domains (such as family) (p. 415). Spontaneous abortion: see "miscarriage" (p. 407). Stalking: repeatedly and maliciously following or harassing another person (p. 412). Stillbirth: birth in which the fetus is born dead (p. 407). Stress: the reaction of our minds and bodies to an unusual or substantial demand made on us (p. 392). Stressor overload: unrelated but unrelenting small stressors that can produce a breakdown in a person's or a family's morale (p. 421). Stressors: precipitating events that cause stress (p. 392). Sublimation: socially constructed behavior that is formed to disguise unacceptable behavior (p. 422). Substance abuse: see "drug abuse" (p. 401). Substance dependence: biological dependence on a substance (p. 401). Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS): event in which an apparently healthy infant under 1 year of age dies suddenly—and inexplicably—while sleeping (p. 407). Underemployed workers: workers who hold jobs below their level of qualification or are working part time but want to work full time (p. 398). Unemployed workers: those seeking work who are new to the labor force or have been laid off (temporarily dismissed), downsized (permanently dismissed), or fired (dismissed for cause, such as absenteeism) (p. 397). Victim shelter: see "women's shelter" (p. 416). Violence: the threat of or infliction of physical or emotional harm on another (p. 408). Vulnerability: psychological or environmental difficulties that make children more at risk for developing later personality, behavioral, or social problems (p. 394). Widow: wife who outlives her husband (p. 406). Widower: husband who outlives his wife (p. 406). Women's safehouses: private homes that provide temporary housing for abused women and are known only to residents and shelter workers (p. 416). Women's shelter: shelter that provides not only food and accommodation but also other help such as money, food stamps, counseling, and legal, medical, and employment assistance; also called victim shelter (p. 416).

Adaptation versus Coping Strategies

Adaptation: not changing a stressor or the stress (p. 422). Coping: changing a stressor or changing your reaction to it (p. 422). Coping strategies: generally realistic and helpful ways of dealing with stress, pain, fear, and other problems caused by stressors (p. 422).

Race & ethnicity: Do national origins & culture matter?

African American couples twice as likely to end marriages as white and hispanics (are generally poor)

Key terms 14

Alienation of affection laws: allow a spouse to bring suit for damages against a third party with whom his or her spouse has had an extramarital affair and who is alleged to be responsible for the failure of the marriage (p. 438). Alimony: see "spousal support" (p. 458). Alimony myth: the belief that most women profit from divorce by receiving high alimony payments (p. 458). Annulment: pronouncement that declares that a couple never had a valid marriage, returning both partners to single status and allowing them to marry others (p. 437). Birdnesting: type of child custody in which the children remain in the family home and the parents alternate staying with them (p. 463). Child abduction: see "child stealing" (p. 465). Child custody: the court-mandated decision about which parent will be primarily responsible for the upbringing and welfare of the child(ren) (p. 439). Child stealing: the act in which one parent kidnaps his or her children from the other parent; also called child abduction (p. 465). Child support: ongoing financial assistance for childcare expenses that the separated or divorced parent with custody of the child receives from the noncustodial parent (p. 459). Child Support Enforcement Amendments: laws that require states to deduct from fathers' paychecks and tax returns delinquent child-support payments (p. 461). Children's allowance: system in which the government provides a grant of child support to all families based on the number of children they have (p. 461). Collaborative divorce: a couple and their lawyers sign a contract agreeing to dissolve the marriage without litigation—and if they fail, the lawyers pledge to drop out of the case before it goes to court (p. 453). Community divorce: aspect of divorce in which each partner reduces or leaves membership in a common community of relatives and friends (p. 450). Community property: property acquired by the couple during their marriage (p. 439). Controlled separation: separation that is usually negotiated in a therapist's office, never a lawyer's, and has the ultimate goal of saving a marriage by having a contract or written commitment specifying the time limits (usually no more than six months), living arrangements, finances, and contact between the two parties (p. 436). Co-parental divorce: decisions about child custody, child support, visitation rights, and the ongoing responsibilities of each parent (p. 450). Crude divorce rate: number of divorces in a given year per 1,000 population (p. 439). Deadbeat dads: fathers who don't meet their court-ordered child-support responsibilities (p. 460). Desertion: one spouse simply abandons the marriage and family and has no subsequent contact (p. 435). Displaced homemakers: full-time housewives who lose their economic support owing to divorce or widowhood (p. 458). Divorce: the legal dissolution of a valid marriage (p. 438). Divorce hangover: being unable to let go of the fact of a divorce, to reorient to being a single parent, or to develop new friendships (p. 454). Divorce mediation: process in which divorcing spouses make agreements with a third party about property division, spousal support, child custody, and child support (p. 453). Divorce-related malicious mother syndrome: a mother unjustifiably punishes her divorcing or divorced husband by attempting to alienate their mutual children from him by involving others (including lawyers) in malicious actions against him, and by denying him visitation, telephone access, and participation in the children's school and after-school activities (p. 465). Divorcism: belief that divorce is harmful (p. 442). Economic divorce: involves settlement of the property (p. 450). Emotional divorce: loss of affection, trust, and respect for each other; replacement of positive emotions with indifference or destructive emotions (p. 449). Equal-distribution states: states in which property that was acquired by either spouse during their marriage (except gifts from third parties) legally belong equally to the husband and wife (p. 457). Equitable-distribution states: states in which the law dictates a fair and reasonable distribution of property that may be more than or less than 50% of any asset to either of the divorcing parties (p. 457). Family Support Act: act that authorizes judges to use their discretion when support agreements cannot be met and requires period reviews of award levels to keep up with the rate of inflation (p. 461). Fathers' rights movement: movement urging that divorced male parents have equal treatment with divorced female parents in matters of child custody, visitation, and support (p. 464). Formal separation: separation in which a couple uses a lawyer to draw up a legal agreement enabling them to live separately but specifying financial, child-custody, child-support, and visitation arrangements between them (p. 436). Guaranteed child support: system in which the government sends to the custodial parent the amount of child-support payment that was awarded, then collects that amount from the noncustodial parent (p. 461). Informal separation: separation in which spouses settle financial, child-custody, child-support, and visitation arrangements informally between themselves; no legal papers are drawn up (p. 436). Joint custody: type of child custody in which the children divide their time between both parents (p. 463). Joint legal custody: type of child custody in which children live with one parent, but both parents share decisions about their children's upbringing (p. 463). Joint physical custody: type of child custody in which children live with both parents, dividing their time on a more or less equal basis between the separate households (p. 463). Legal divorce: court-ordered termination of a marriage (p. 449). Marriage sabbatical: a personal timeout from daily routines for creative, professional, or spiritual growth, or for study, reflection, or renewal (p. 436). No-fault divorce: divorce in which neither partner is found guilty or at fault; the marriage is declared unworkable and is legally dissolved for irreconcilable differences (p. 439). Parent alienation syndrome (PAS): a disturbance in which children view one parent as all good and the other parent as all bad. The "bad" parent is hated and verbally marginalized, and the "good" parent is idealized and loved (p. 465). Parenting coordinator: a qualified neutral person appointed by the court or agreed to by the parties to assist the parties in resolving issues related to parenting (p. 465). Psychic divorce: divorce in which you separate from your former partner emotionally and are free from his or her influence (p. 451). Raw numbers: the actual numbers of people who marry and divorce (p. 439). Redivorce: divorces during second or subsequent marriages, with the median length of time for length of marriage declining in each instance (p. 445). Refined divorce rate: number of divorces in a given year for every 1,000 married women over age 15 (p. 440). Rehabilitative alimony: short-term financial payments to help a wife go to school and "rehabilitate" her vocational skills (p. 459). Relatives of divorce: kinship ties that were established during marriage but continue after divorce (p. 451). Satiation: term for what occurs when a stimulus no longer stimulates because of repeated exposure (p. 448). Separation: state in which married partners decide to no longer live together (p. 436). Separation distress: psychological state following separation that may feature feelings of depression, loss, and anxiety, as well as intense loneliness (p. 454). Six stations, or processes, of divorce: psychological model of divorce consisting of emotional, legal, economic, co-parental, community, and psychic processes (p. 449). Social integration: degree of cohesion and strength of social bonds that people have with each other and their community (p. 442). Sole custody: type of child custody in which children live with one parent, who is solely responsible for raising them, and the other parent has legally specified visitation rights (p. 461). Split custody: type of child custody in which the children are divided between the two parents (p. 463). Spousal entitlement: situation in which a nonworking spouse receives a kind of severance pay for her or his "investment" in the marriage—for helping to advance the income earner's career during the marriage (p. 459). Spousal maintenance: see "spousal support" (p. 458). Spousal support: court-ordered financial support by a spouse or a former spouse to the other following separation or divorce; also called spousal maintenance or alimony (p. 458). Supervised visitation: system in which a noncustodial parent is allowed to visit his or her child only in the presence a third party such as a court employee or social worker (p. 465). Third-party custody: type of child custody in which custody is awarded to a grandparent, other relative, or some other adult instead of the parents (p. 463). Uncoupling: series of stages in which couples—whether married or cohabiting, heterosexual or homosexual—move toward ending their relationship (p. 434). Virtual visitation: the use of online tools such as videoconferencing, webcams, and other wired or wireless technologies with which a noncustodial divorced parent can visit his or her child (p. 463). Visitation schedules: days and times in which the noncustodial parent is allowed to visit the children (p. 439).

Key Terms

Athletic coach parenting style: approach to parenting in which parents set rules for the house (helped by input from the family), teach their children the rules, and apply appropriate penalties for infractions (p. 345). Authoritarian childrearing: approach to parenting in which parents are repressive, controlling, and often unreasonably strict (p. 343). Authoritative childrearing: approach to parenting in which parents are both strict and controlling and warm and supportive (p. 344). Bonding: close emotional attachment (p. 340). Continuous coverage system: experience in which parents must become fully responsible for a fragile infant—immediately, 24 hours every day (p. 341). Corporal punishment: the use of physical force to cause a child to experience pain but not injury, with the intent of correcting or controlling the child's behavior (p. 346). Dysfunctional family: family in which the parents demonstrate negative or destructive behavior toward each other and/or their children (p. 335). Helicopter parenting: parents' overinvolvement in the lives of their children, including making important decisions for them, solving their problems, and intervening in their conflicts (p. 345). Infant mortality rate: the number of children who die before 1 year of age per 1,000 live births (p. 320). Latchkey child: a school-age child who regularly spends part of a day unsupervised at home while his or her parents are at work (p. 334). Martyr parenting style: approach to parenting in which parents make great sacrifices for the children and exercise little or no authority over them (p. 344). Morning sickness: nausea and vomiting that happen frequently in the early morning but also during other times of the day during pregnancy (p. 339). Pal parenting (laissez-faire parenting) style: approach to parenting in which parents let children set their own goals, rules, and limits (p. 344). Permissiveness childrearing: parenting approach in which parents are warm and reasonable (p. 344). Police officer parenting style: authoritarian and repressive style of parenting in which parents insist that their children follow rules and punish them when they don't (p. 344). Postpartum blues: a mother's period of sadness and anxiety after giving birth (p. 340). Postpartum depression: severe persistent symptoms of a major depression in a woman after she gives birth that warrant the assistance of a healthcare professional (p. 340). Postpartum period: three-month period following childbirth, during which critical family and emotional adjustments are made (p. 340). Premature birth: birth that occurs during less than 37 weeks of pregnancy (p. 322). Sandwich generation: generation that is sandwiched between taking care of their children and taking care of their own aging parents (p. 348). Spanking: hitting a child, usually on the buttocks, with an open hand without causing physical injury (p. 346). Teacher-counselor parenting style: approach to parenting in which parents are intensely focused on guiding their children's behavior (p. 345).

Transition to fatherhood

Autonomous fathers- distance themselves from family commitments Involved fathers - deeply involved in their children being present at birth providing or participating in childcare

Older Parents

Average age of first time mothers increased by four years from 1970 to 2010 (From 21 to 25 years) 2014 - Birthrate of teenage girls and early 20s womens declined to record lowers, birth rates for women in their 30s and 40s increased

Key 15 terms

Binuclear family: family in which former spouses and children live in two different households (p. 483). Biological father-stepmother family: form of blended family in which all children are biological children of the father and are stepchildren of the stepmother (p. 483). Biological mother-stepfather family: form of blended family in which all children are biological children of the mother and are stepchildren of the stepfather (p. 484). Blended family: family that is created when two people marry and one or both brings into the household a child or children from a previous marriage; also called a stepfamily (p. 483). Cultural script: set of social norms for guiding the various participants in their relations with each other (p. 483). Double remarriages: marriages in which both partners were previously married (p. 483). Family boundary: rules about who is and is not considered a member of the family and the extent to which each member is allowed to participate (p. 486). Genogram: diagram that clearly shows all the people who genetically, emotionally, and legally constitute a particular family (p. 485). Hidden agenda: expectations about how everyone should behave that often are not communicated to everyone (p. 490). Joint biological-stepfamily: form of blended family in which (1) at least one child is the biological child of both parents, and (2) at least one child is the biological child of one parent and the stepchild of the other parent (p. 484). Nuclear-family model monopoly: model in which the first-marriage family is seen as the legitimate model of how families should be and all other forms are seen as deficient alternatives (p. 481). Quasi-kin: the person a former spouse remarries, previous in-laws, and new in-laws from remarriage (p. 485). Serial marriage: participation in a sequence of marital partnerships, one at a time; also called serial monogamy (p. 475). Serial monogamy: see "serial marriage" (p. 475). Single remarriages: marriages in which only one of the partners was previously married (p. 483). Stepfamily: see "blended family" (p. 483). Stepism: attitude of prejudice and discrimination; it assumes that stepfamilies are inferior to biological families (p. 481). Stepmother trap: situation in which a stepmother is expected to be unnaturally loving toward her stepchildren, yet also is viewed as being mean, abusive, and vain (p. 490).

Key Terms Chapter 12

Compressed work week: week in which employees perform a full-time job in less than five days of standard eight- or nine-hour shifts, such as four days of 10 hours each (p. 383). Co-provider marriage: marriage in which both married partners are employed outside the home; also called dual-earner marriage (p. 375). Dual-earner marriage: see "co-provider marriage" (p. 375). Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA): law that requires U.S. companies that employ 50 or more workers to provide up to 12 weeks of unpaid leave a year to employees with a newborn or newly adopted child, a serious personal illness, or a seriously ill family member (p. 384). Feminization of poverty: the likelihood that female heads of households will be poor, owing to job and wage discrimination, high divorce rates, and births to unmarried women (p. 370). Flextime: flexible working hours or any schedule that gives one some choices in working hours (p. 382). Glass ceiling: a metaphor for an invisible barrier preventing women and minorities from being promoted to top executive jobs (p. 376). Good-provider role: emphasizes that the man is the principal or sole economic provider for the family (p. 373). Homemaker role: emphasizes that the woman should be principally responsible for housework, childrearing, and maintaining family ties to parents and in-laws (p. 373). Househusband: a man who is a full-time homemaker; also called stay-at-home dad (p. 374). Income: the amount of money a household receives from various sources during a given period of time (p. 363). Job sharing: two coworkers dividing one full-time job (p. 383). Labor force: wage earners who hire out their labor to someone else (p. 360). Leisure: time not taken up by work in which to engage in freely chosen, satisfying activities (p. 361). Living wage laws: laws requiring that wages and benefits take into account the area's cost of living (p. 368). Median income: the income midpoint—half of a population earns more, and half earns less (p. 363). Net worth: see "wealth" (p. 364). Poverty line: officially defined as the minimum level of income the U.S. government considers necessary for individual and family subsistence (p. 368). Positive self-talk: giving yourself positive messages so that you can view a situation in beneficial terms (p. 380). Role ambiguity: situation in which others' expectations are unknown (p. 380). Role compartmentalization: separating one's roles within the mind so that the worries associated with one role (such as work) don't disturb one's feelings and performance in the other role (such as home) (p. 380). Role conflict: conflict that occurs when the expectations of two or more roles are incompatible (p. 378). Role overload: experience that occurs when others' expectations exceed one's ability to meet them (p. 379). Stay-at-home dad: see "househusband (p. 374). Telecommuting: working at home while in telecommunication contact—by Internet, phone, and fax—with the office (p. 363). Two-person single career: family form in which the husband works outside the home and the wife—even if she is also employed—helps the husband's career by being responsible for domestic tasks and childrearing (p. 373). Wealth: monetary value of everything one actually owns—such as property, stocks, and insurance—minus debts; also called net worth (p. 364). Welfare: aid to those in need (p. 363).

Unpredictable Stressors 6

Death a. Death of a parent atleast 25 percent of adults still cry or get upset over deceased parent'20 percent continue to have thoughts over parents Second parent can also be prfoundly change adult siblings relationships b. Death of a spouse Men are more depression than women after their mate's death Recovery is too long and difficult, widowed men and women are more apt to experience health problems c. Death of a child Most severe kind of stressor that most people can face i. Miscarriage or stillbirth 15% of pregnancies 46th in the world of this category, rather far behind such countries as first place signapore, fourth place japan, 15th place germany, whichh provides health care for all pregnant women and children. Canda is 36th ii. Infant death iii. Loss of older child

Unpredictable Stressors 3

Drug & alcohol abuse i. Stimulants Caffiene, nicotine, amphetamines, cocaine, stimulants speed up brain activity increasing arousal e-cigarettes use has surpassed traditional cigarettes among youths ii. Depressants Alcohol, solvents inhalants sedative hypnotics iii. Cannabis Marijuana and hashish iv. Hallucinogens LSD, acid, etc v. Opiates Opium Alcohol abuse in 2014 death related to alcohol soared up in the first time in 35 years Men drink more than women, however women drinking went from 45 to 48 Only 24 percent of alcoholics ever get treatment

Strategy for Living

E. Strategy for Living #2: Manage Your Emotional Response 1. Be realistic & keep control of any destructive impulses 2. Use reframing to feel & act positively 3. Have fun, keep your sense of humor, & have hope F. Strategy for Living #3: Develop a Support System 1. Social support systems a. Being single b. Social isolation c. Altruistic egoism 2. Your coping resources a. Find support in your family members b. Talk to and do things with friends c. Join a support group or talk to a counselor G. Strategy for Living #4: Take Care of Your Body 1. Eat right 2. Exercise right 3. Sleep right 4. Avoid drugs

Unpredictable Stressors 2

Infidelity: Sexual & emotional unfaithfulness a. Short-term extramarital involvements Men- Sex without love Women- involves love as well as sex Men are mot apt to have an affair for the feeling of conquest and sexual exctitment, women because they are angry with their husbands and seek revenge b. Long-term extramarital involvements i. Marriage maintenance—"To supply what's missing from my marriage" Marriage maintenance affairs: affairs that provide something missing from the marriage (p. 399). ii. Intimacy reduction—"To buffer against too much closeness in my marriage" Intimacy reduction affairs: affairs by a spouse who feels uncomfortable with too much closeness in his or her marriage (p. 399). iii. Reactive—"To reassure me of my sexuality" Reactive affairs: affairs by partners who are seeking reassurance about their youthfulness and sexuality (p. 399). iv. Hedonistic—"Just for the fun and sensuality of it" Hedonistic affairs: affairs as acts of playfulness (p. 399). Affairs without sex - Cybersex affair in which a person has a secret online relationship with someone in an internet chatroom Central to a marriage: trust and intimacy

Types of Stressor Events: Internal versus External

Internal stressors: stressors that begin inside the family (p. 395). External stressors: stressors that begin with someone or something outside the family (p. 395).

The Childless or Child-Free Older Adult

Less family support system, more likely to be instituionalized

Unpredictable Stressors 4d

Mental disorders a. Anxiety disorders b. Mood disorders: Depression & suicide c. Eating disorders: Anorexia & bulimia 15% of girls and 4% of boys i. Anorexia nervosa ii. Bulimia Anorexia nervosa: self-starvation, resulting from a distorted body self-image that leads to the conviction that one is grossly overweight (p. 403). Anxiety disorders: four common mental disorders: generalized anxiety disorders, panic attacks, phobias, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (p. 403). Mood disorders: mental disorders usually characterized by periods of depression, sometimes alternating with periods of elevated mood (p. 403). Bulimia: eating disorder that consists of episodes of binge eating alternating with purging (p. 404).

Can a Happy Marriage Save Your Life?

Miserable marriages make women sick Unhappily married were worse off on heart disease than were ither happily wed women or single women Take longer to heal from physical wounds

3. Child sexual abuse

One out of six boys, one out of four girl sexually abused

What about the "Social Safety Net"?

Page 372

Unpredictable Stressors 5

Physical disability & illness a. Keep the illness from completely dominating your lives b. View the adversity as a challenge to be faced together c. Review the balance between closeness & autonomy

Relationships of adult children to their parents

a. Most older people are not supported by the government b. Both generations generally assume that children will assist parents if needed c. Emotional closeness of adult children to their parents varies d. Daughters are generally closer than sons are to their parents

Less social integration: Is mobility linked to divorce?

Social integration: degree of cohesion and strength of social bonds that people have with each other and their community (p. 442). Husbands and wives closer to inlaws makes them happier

Transition to motherhood

Stages of childrearing: Childbearing - last 2 and a half years - On average, American women have their first child at age 26. Kids about 30 months apart Family with preschoolers - last 3 and a half years Couples oldest child is 2 to 6 years old Family with school children - last about 7 tears By this stage, oldest child is 13 to 20 years old. Family as launching center- lasts about 8 years Oldest child is an adult and has been launched into independence

. The Long Good-Bye: Bohannan's Six Stations of Divorce

The emotional divorce: "I don't care for him/her anymore; I'm no longer involved" a. Beginning phase feel disappointment with eachother b. Middle phase Anger and hurt feelings increase and issues unresolved c. End phase Stop caring, become apathetic and indifferent to others feelings

Two kinds of marital violence: Patriarchal & common couple violence

a. Patriarchal terrorism—from the need to control generally b. Common couple violence—from the need to control a specific situation

Single Working Parents

Where are black husbands anf fathers? 1.5 million men are missing for every 100 black women ages 25 to 54 Explanation: Incarceration and early deaths" 40% of intimates of african american

The legal divorce: "I wanted out, but I miss what we once had—& why is the legal system so difficult?"

a. Ambivalence and grieving b. Adversarial aggravation

Child abuse & neglect

a. Children of single parents Had 77% greater risk of being harmed by physical abuse and 86% greater risk of physical neglect, 80% of suffering serious injury or harm b. Children in large families physically neglected nearly three times as much c. Children in low-income families Children from families with annual income below 15,000 were more than 22 times more likely to experiece abuse Poorer children were 18 times more likely to be sexually abused, almost 56 times more lilkely to be educationally neglected or seriously injured d. Girls Sexually abused three times more often than boy, however boys are at greater risk of emotional neglect and serious injury e. Race and ethnicity No significant race ehtnicity different in the incident of maltreatment

The psychic divorce: "Now, finally, I don't care about him/her anymore: I'm my own person"

a. Denial b. Anger and depression c. Acceptance and forgiveness

Uncoupling: The ending of relationships

a. Dissatisfaction b. Attempts at change c. Turning elsewhere d. Further distancing e. Resolution f. Informing the other partner g. Acknowledging the ending

Divorce: Legal ending to a valid marriage

a. Divorce before the 1970s—The fault system To parties hired lawyers to fight against eachother in court Most states making it easier by removing fault requirements b. Divorce after the 1970s—No-fault divorce community property, child custody and visitation schedules

Education & income: Do more schooling & more money encourage marital stability

a. Education Only highschool degree- could divorce More years of school man has, less likely to divorce b. Income Higher income 0 less likely to divorce fired men 18 percent more likely to divorce, for women 13 percent

Escaping family violence

a. Experiencing doubts b. Turning point c. Detachment and reevaluation d. Shift in thinking e. Breaking free

Societal & Demographic Factors Associated with Divorce 1. Family, religious, & legal institutions: Have changes encouraged more divorce?

a. Family b. Religion c. Law

Issues about child custody: Hurt & rage in noncustodial parents, particularly fathers

a. Father's separation—The loss to both parent and children b. Parent alienation syndrome—When children hate their parents c. Child stealing—Kidnapping children from the other parent d. Supervised visitation—Presence of a third party during visits

Why do people stay in violent relationships?

a. Fear of partner, isolation, or poverty b. Love, pity, duty, guilt, hope c. Low self-esteem, childhood experience, learned helplessness

Risk factors for child abuse

a. History of physical punishment b. Unrealistic expectations for the child c. Other factors

Separation: No longer living together but still married

a. Informal separation b. Formal separation c. Controlled separation

Dealing with family violence

a. Intervention b. Shelters and safehouses c. Treatment programs for abusers

What about divorce among LGBT couples? Or nonmarried couples?

a. LGBT couples b. Unmarried straight couples

The challenges to single parenting

a. Money matters 2013 - Median income of female head of household with no husband was 35,000 compared with 76,000 of married couples Divorced single mothers make less than widowed single mothers Unmarried menw ho fathered children are more apt to be poor than are those who didnt father children before marriage Nearly 30% of poor noncustodial fathers are in prison, 5 million children have at least one parent in prison b. Children's stability Kids who do drugs: With parents 20.4 percent with mothers: 28.3 with fathers: 38.4 Single parent children twice as likely to develop psychiatric illness Girls: three times as likely to do drugs Boys: four times as likely


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