Active and Passive Voice
barbara Mellix
" Each experience of writing was like standing naked and revealing my imperfections, my 'otherness"
cynthis Ozick
" Writing is an act of courage"
Donald M. Murray's "Zero Draft"
"Many writers feel that they are not writing when they are drafting; they are only writing when they are revising."
when is passive voice appropriate?
1) if you wish to emphasize the receiver of the action 2) to minimize the importance of the doer 3) to achieve a tine of coolness or stiffness 4) to create a sentence that avoids naming to actor of a particular deed
sometimes writers...
1) repeat an element found in the introduction 2) restate the thesis 3) ask the reader to understand an action that the essay seems to invite 4) asks themselves " why have I told you this?"
In the level 1 the writer needs to decide what
1)Have you conveyed the proper meaning? 2) have you done what you promised the reader you would? 3) have you provided enough support? 4) have you focused clearly enough on your main point?
7 basic points to keep in mind
1)vary the length of your sentences. short sentences are more emphatic (use to make key points) 2) vary the structure of your sentences 3) watch wordiness 4) use the active voice 5)make verbs reflect an action rather then a state of existence 6) make sure the elements that should be parallel are parallel 7)eliminate cliches and jargon
Last paragraph
A good concluding paragraph will draw on an essay together,restate it and summarize
First paragraph
A good introduction art paragraph will capture the attention of the readers and provide them a nutshell a paragraph (try some variety)
first paragraph
A good introductory paragraph will capture the attention of the readers and provide them a nutshell paragraph. Try some variety
Level 2
Checking the organization
advice given in class
Don't radically rearrange, don't move intro elements to the end unless absolutely necessary, and don't use generic subjects
active voice
If the subject performs the action the verb and clause are in the active voice
passive voice
If the subject receives the action, or is acted upon, the verb and the clause are in the passive voice.
You can't be sure of what you're ______ until you have written what you want to___
Introducing introduce
How is writing a dynamic and unpredictable process?
Murry's Diagram plan, draft, revise, edit, proofread ( a constant cycle)
Pay particular attention to the _____ and _____paragraphs
Opening closing
One good way to see whether you have said what you intended is to read your manuscript_____
Outloud
what do professional writers do?
Professional writers seldom rely upon their own judgement
How does revision distinguish writing from speaking?
Revision affords the writer additional chances to get the meaning right
When you have answered the questions from the first level as well as you can, you are ready to move on to a closer examination of _____,considering the ____ of each paragraph and the_______ of your essay as a whole
Structure, unity,organization
Revision at this level is not merely a way to fix problems that you can see on the page.it is also a way to identify____
What was not said
how do you transform a sentence from passive to active?
You make the "doer" of the action the subject of the sentence
last paragraph
a good concluding paragraph will draw an essay together, restate it, and summarize it.
level 1
appraising the content
formula for "passive voice"
be verb+past participle=passive voice
principle parts of be
be, being, been, was, am, is, are, were,
How can a good writer be distinguished from a poor writer?
by their attitude towards revision
_____ is the disease of American writing
clutter
revision
concluding remarks
what should you do if you are this reader for someone else?
don't think that It is a kindness not to criticize thins you think need attention
what do you check when editing your paper?
grammar, spelling, mechanics, and punctuation
What is the deepest level of revision?
level 1
Coherent
logically and cosnistant
Writing is intensely _______. we offer the world a part of ourselves and we don't want to be rejected. But it is important to overcome undue _______ if you want to write well. Be _______ with others and encourage them to be____ with you
personal sensibility honest honest
level 3
refining the style
after studying the structure of your work as a whole, you should then check to see whether the individual _________ can be improved
sentences
memorize this!
strip down your writing before you build it back up
voice
the indication of whether the subject performs or receives the action of the verb
What is the significance of a prepositional phrase starting with the word by?
the object of a prepositional phrase is often the doer of the action
what does it mean to let words incubate?
to come back to, to see with new eyes, to
Unified
to make or become a whole, flows
what does revise mean
to see again
how can you get more from this reader?
try to make your reader understand that you are not looking for praise. Be frank with then about anything that concerns you and direct their attentions specifically
we are a society strangling in
unnecessary words, circular constructions, pompous frills and meaningless jargons
"soliciting help from _____,_______ ______ can help you gain a new ________ on what you have written
well-disposed, thoughtful readers perspective
when do writers feel that they have put themselves at risk? why is that?
when we show others our writing, becuase writing is so intimitly bound up with who we are
when can you begin to recognize your own developing maturity as a writer?
when you are able to accept and profit from constructive criticism but also seek it out.
When are you ready to edit your paper?
when you believe that you have said what you want to say the way you want to say it.
what must you do if you want to write well?
you must write often and read often, appraise your work critically, and think crucially about what you have read