Chapter 11: Attraction and Social Exclusion (SOP3004)

What does this choosiness cause?

The opposite sex (the male) has to be more competitive and aggressive in their pursuit

Attention to Social Information

1. Memory for social events (Gardner et al., 2000) 2. Attention to smiles (DeWall et al., 2009)

Social Rejection

- A denial of belonging that is explicitly conveyed (e.g., "I don't want to be your friend")

Social Exclusion

- Any denial of belonging (e.g., classmates never inviting a certain person to social events)

Kenrick Results (1990)

- Between men and women, the biggest difference was for casual sex - Women expected intelligence, while men hardly expected any - They had the same standards for long term marriage - Different standards for short-term; similar for long-term standards

Attraction & Mating

- Design your ideal mate - Given 10 traits (e.g., physical attractiveness, yearly income, etc.) - Said they could spend $20 on "buying" increases in the various traits

What leads to an activation of a threat-response system?

- Exclusion - Wariness towards other people

Clark & Hatfield Conclusions (1989)

- Found that when propositioned by a total stranger, none of the females agreed to have sex with a stranger whereas a staggering 75% of males agreed - This supports the link between sexual selection and mating strategies

What does the need to belong require?

- Frequent, pleasant interactions with others - That these interactions occur within an enduring relationship

The Need to Belong

- Fundamental human motive - The drive to form/maintain close, lasting relationships - Pervasive, strong influence

Maner Social Networking Study (2007)

- Interest in social networking service - Those who felt more rejected were more likely to join FSU connect

Clark & Hatfield Study (1989)

- Men and women were equally likely to accept a date from a stranger - A majority of men accepted the invitation to casual sexual behavior; not a single woman agreed to go to the apartment or bed

Li Ideal Mating Study (2002)

- Men spent most of their mate dollars on attractiveness, where as women spent most on intelligence and yearly income - This is because a woman's body is very important during reproduction, so their physical features are important - After the man gives his sperm, he is no longer directly involved in reproduction, so men are more needed for things like a stable income

Williams Virtual Ball-Toss Study (2000)

- Participants asked to use mental visualization while playing a virtual tossing game with two others (who were actually computer generated and controlled) - The more participants were ostracized, the more they reported feeling bad, having less control, and losing a sense of belonging - Ostracized participants were more likely to conform on a subsequent task

DeWall & Baumeister Pain Tolerance Study (2006)

- People had higher pain tolerance when they were told they were going to be alone in the future than when they were told they would have future belonging or future misfortune (something bad will happen to them) - When you are rejected you feel more physically numb

Attraction

- People like those who are similar to themselves (i.e., birds of a feather flock together) - Especially true for one's ideal self - Mimicry builds rapport

Pseudorelationships

- Relationships we form with celebrities and TV characters - May decrease feelings of loneliness

Cyberball

- Virtual ball toss game where the participant is led to believe they are playing with two other participants sitting at computers elsewhere who can toss the ball to either player -The participant is included in the game for the first few minutes - Excluded by the other players for the remaining three minutes

Physical Attractiveness

- We like and love those who are physically attractive - Presumption that physically attractive people are good in other ways

Sex Differences

- Women: waist-to-hip ratio; youth - Men: signs of masculinity- square jaw; prominent chin; heavy eyebrows

Typical Exclusion Manipulations

1. Bogus personality feedback 2. Exclusion from confederates (e.g., "no one wanted to work with you") 3. cyberball 4. recalling exclusion experiences

Behaviors that aid reconnection

1. Conformity (Williams et al., 2000) 2. Mimicry (Lakin et al., 2008) 3. Willingness to do cocaine (Mead et al., 2010)

Reasons for Exclusion

1. Deviating from group norms (e.g., cheating) 2. Possessing a stigmatized attribute (e.g., some diseases) 3. Having nothing to offer the group

Parental Investment Theory

Any time, energy, resources, and risk that a parent uses for the benefit of their offspring

Lonliness

Chronic perceived social isolation

Negative consequences for physical health?

Diminish ability to physically heal

Kenrick Study (1990)

Had people report the minimum level of intelligence they would require their partner to have a date, casual sex, committed relationship, and marriage

Negative consequences for mental health?

Linked to depression and suicide

Reinforcement Theories

People like those who are rewarding to them; have something to offer them

Reciprocity of Attraction

People tend to like those who also like them

Exclusion

Process in which individuals are blocked from (or denied full access to) various rights, opportunities and resources that are normally available to others, and which are fundamental to social integration

What are some factors that increase our attraction to a potential partner?

Proximity, mere exposure, similarity (behavior, personality, and physical characteristics), attractiveness

Who will be the choosier of the two (men or women)?

The sex investing the most and having the most to lose (the female) in reproduction

Effects of Social Exclusion (Cyberball)

This simple and short time period of ostracism has been found to produce significant increases to self-reported levels of anger and sadness, as well as lowering levels of the four needs