Effective Human Relations Exam II: Chapter 6: Attitudes Can Shape Your Life *-through-* Chapter 10: Building Stronger Relationships With Positive Energy

Forms of Positivity

-Positivity broadens and builds -Positivity transforms us for the better -"Positivity ratio": 3 positive events/emotions required to balance each negative one (3:1)

There are several barriers to providing positive reinforcement

-Preoccupation with the self -Misconceptions about positive reinforcement -The "too busy" syndrome -Failing to identify commendable actions

Thank You

-Saying "Thank you" correlates with the economic success of an organization -Giving thanks is a great motivational tool -A carefully prepared thank-you note sent after a job interview may provide a competitive edge in today's job market

Fine Tuning your emotional style

-Take responsibility for your emotions -Put your problems into proper perspective -Take steps to move beyond toxic emotions such as envy, anger, jealousy, or hatred -Give your feelings some exercise -Experts say most people should give themselves two years to recover from a major emotional trauma such as a divorce or loss of a job

Preventing workplace Violence

-The simple recognition of the intense feelings of someone who is angry does a lot to defuse the situation 1.Use hiring procedures that screen out unstable persons 2.Develop a strategy for responding to incidents before they actually occur 3.When employees are demoted, fired, or laid off, do it in a way that does not demoralize the employee 4.Provide out-placement services for laid-off or terminated employees 5.Establish a systematic way to deal with disgruntled employees. 6.Provide supervisors and managers with training that will help them prevent workplace violence and deal effectively with violence if it does occur

Positive environments

-Uplifting -Encouraging -Empowering -Energizing / comforting

The "Too Busy" Syndrome

-When we are too busy or stressed it is easy to forget or postpone gratitude and praise -The solution to this problem is planning: set aside a few minutes each day for performance feedback & positive reinforcement activities

Energy

The capacity for work or the force that helps us do things with vitality and intensity

External Motivations

Examples: rewards given by others praise money assessments

Internal Motivations

Examples: Pride Self Satisfaction

Clinic Service Corporation

Extensive training programs, quarterly meetings, rewards for performance

The Theory of Flow

Flow: mental state in which a person performing an activity is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus (absorption in task)

Positive reinforcers

strengthen a response if they are experienced after the response occurs

The 16 Basic Desires in the Reiss Profile

A table displaying all the desires one has and their reasoning or definition for that desire.

Facts about human nature

-People want to know how they are doing -People appreciate recognition for their accomplishments -People often prefer negative feedback to no feedback at all

Cultural Intelligence

- ability to interpret human actions, gestures, and speech patterns in a foreign culture

Capitulating (surrender) to Your Emotions

-People who capitulate to their emotions are often overly concerned about the attitudes and opinions of others

Active Listening

-Active listening can be a powerful reinforcer -Everyone feels a sense of personal value when speaking with a good listener -People long for authentic interactions with coworkers and bosses who are good listeners

Incentive program

-Activities designed to motivate employees to achieve an objective -Incentives can be cash or noncash rewards --Increase sales •Improve customer service --Increase productivity •Lower operating costs --Improve quality •Some combination of these

Temperament

-An infant's individual style and frequency of expressing needs and emotions. -Although temperament mainly reflects nature's contribution to the beginning of one's personality, it can also be affected by environmental factors after birth

Emotional Intelligence

-At best, IQ contributes about 20 percent to the factors that determine life success, which leaves 80 percent to other forces." - Emotional intelligence can be described as the ability to monitor and control one's emotions and behavior at work and in social settings -Whereas standard intelligence (IQ) deals with thinking and reasoning, EQ deals more broadly with building social relationships and controlling one's emotions

Support from Skinner

-B.F. Skinner proposed that any living organism will tend to repeat a behavior if that behavior is accompanied or followed by a reinforcer

How to Change Attitudes

-Choose Happiness -Embrace Optimism -Think For Yourself -Keep an Open Mind

Incentive plan fundamentals

-Do not assume that financial rewards provide the most powerful incentive -Avoid incentives that might foster unethical behavior -Always field-test incentive plans

Negative environments

-Fearful -Judgmental -Depleting -Draining

Identifying your emotional pattern

-Journal entries can help you discover emotional patterns. Record not only your conscious feelings, such as anxiety or guilt, but feelings in your body, such as a knot in your stomach or muscle tension -Becoming a skilled observer of your own emotions is one of the best ways to achieve greater emotional control.

Causes of Negative Attitudes

-Low Self-Esteem -Unresolved Conflict -Work That Is Not Satisfying -Fear or Uncertainty

Misconceptions about Positive Reinforcement

-Myth: Praise will lead to demands for tangible evidence of appreciation (e.g., a raise) -Myth: Praise diminishes one's power or control -Fact: People often demand greater tangible rewards in the absence of praise

Negative vs. positive emotions

-Negative emotions are inevitable & required -Humans hardwired with negativity bias that causes us to notice negative events more than positive ones -Focusing on positive emotions requires self-discipline --Some may be easier & faster to implement than others

Over expressing your emotions

-One of the quickest ways to lose the respect and confidence of the people you work with is to frequently display a lack of emotional control -One acceptable way to cope with fear, anger, grief, or jealousy is to sit down with pen and paper and write a letter to the person who triggered these emotions -Studies indicate that a significant emotional uplift and healing effect can result from spending as little as five to ten minutes a day writing about whatever issues or problems are getting you down.

Achieving emotional balance

-People make choices dictated primarily by either their heads (reason) or their hearts (feelings)

Toxic Emotions

-Worker humiliation is a common toxin in the workplace; lack of recognition for work well done is another. -Toxicity often creates the kind of pain that shows up in workers' diminished sense of self-worth

Relationship strategy

-a plan for establishing, building, and maintaining quality relationships with customers EMOTIONAL LABOR -Those persons responsible for delivering quality service and building relationships engage in emotional labor. -Work that taxes the mind is often more difficult to handle than physical labor, which strains the body.

Managing your anger

-intense anger takes control of people and distorts their perceptions, which is why angry people often make poor decisions WORKPLACE RAGE -can take the form of yelling, verbal abuse, and physical violence -more likely to occur when workers are stressed by long hours, unrealistic deadlines, cramped quarters, excessive electronic messages, lack of recognition, bullying incidents, or some combination of these factors

Emotion

-is a temporary experience, with positive, negative, or mixed qualities. -Emotions energize our thoughts and behaviors

Mindfulness

-maintaining awareness of emotions, thoughts, and feelings that occur in the present moment. It is a method of disciplining your mind and controlling your emotions

Anger

-thoughts, feelings, physical reactions, and actions that result from unacceptable behavior by others

Helping Others Change Attitudes

1. Change the Conditions that precede the behavior 2. Change the Consequences that follow the behavior

Effective ways to express your anger

1.Avoid reacting in a manner that could be seen as emotionally unstable 2.Do not make accusations or try to fix blame 3.Express your feelings in a timely manner 4.Be specific as you describe the factors that triggered your anger, and be clear about the resolution you are seeking 5.Ban the silent treatment

Keeping cool in angry times

1.Keep an anger diary or journal 2.Reframe the situation that triggered anger 3.Be aware of how you talk to yourself 4.If you feel a blow-up coming on, give yourself a time-out before acting on it 5.Pay more attention to the important things in life and recognize that most frustrations, inconveniences, and indignities are trivial and temporary

How to handle other peoples anger

1.Recognize and accept the other person's anger 2.Encourage the angry person to vent his or her feelings 3.Do not respond to an angry person with your own anger 4.Give the angry person feedback

avoidance spiral

A communication spiral in which the parties slowly reduce their dependence on one another, withdraw and become less invested in the relationship. p. 240

neutrality

A defense-arousing behavior in which the sender expresses indifference towards a receiver. p. 242

strategy

A defense-arousing style of communication in which the sender tries to manipulate or trick a receiver; also, the general term for any type of plan, as in the plan for a persuasive speech. p. 242

disconfirming response

A message that expresses a lack of caring or respect for another person. p. 238

confirming responses

A message that expresses respect and valuing of the other person. p. 237

Intrapreneurship

A program that encourages innovation and rewards workers for developing new ideas.

escalatory spiral

A reciprocal pattern of communication in which messages, either confirming or disconfirming, between two or more communicators reinforce one another. p. 240

assertive communication

A style of communication that directly expresses the sender's needs, thoughts, or feelings, delivered in a way that does not attack the receiver's dignity. p. 247

superiority

A style of communication that suggests one person is better than the other. p. 242

problem orientation

A supportive style of communication in which the communicators focus on working together to solve their problems instead of trying to impose their own solutions on one another. p. 241

provisionalism

A supportive style of communication in which the sender expresses a willingness to consider the other person's position. p. 243

Job Rotation

Allows employees to move through a variety of jobs over time.

compromise

An approach to conflict resolution in which both parties attain at least part of what they seek through self-sacrifice. p. 255

lose-lose problem solving

An approach to conflict resolution in which neither party achieves its goals. p. 255

win-lose problem solving

An approach to conflict resolution in which one party reaches its goal at the expense of the other. p. 254

win-win problem solving

An approach to conflict resolution in which the parties work together to satisfy all their goals. p. 256

conflict

An expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce rewards, and interference from the other party in achieving their goals. p. 244

direct aggression

An expression of the sender's thoughts or feelings or both that attacks the position and dignity of the receiver. p. 246

passive aggression

An indirect expression of aggression, delivered in a way that allows the sender to maintain a facade of kindness. p. 247

Salesforce.com

Annual Dreamforce event that combines philanthropy, social/ environmental causes, new product introductions, spiritual/ personal transformation programs, & rock concerts

Courtesy means

Being considerate of others in small ways Showing respect for what others revere Treating everyone, regardless of position, with consideration

Motivational Factors

Benefits above & beyond maintenance factors (recognition, advancement, responsibility). Tend to motivate to greater productivity.

Gratitude

Benefits the giver & the receiver Increases joy, enthusiasm, happiness, optimism Protects us from destructive impulses (e.g., envy, resentment, bitterness) Strategies: keep a gratitude journal, notice & thank others for gestures of goodwill, write notes

Cognitive

Perceptions, beliefs, expectations, or etc...

Migros Ticaret A.S.

Classroom-based & study-abroad training

Self Motivation Strategies

Create self motivating strategies, Make a realistic plan to keep your resolutions in step by step, and nurture a gritty/grit nature.

Motivating the Generations

Different generations that needed different forms of motivation over time

Theory of the Dipper and the Bucket

Each person has an invisible bucket that is constantly being emptied or filled, depending on what others say or do to us

Motivation Through Learning Oppurtunities

Education and training are critical to individual growth and opportunity. Learning can help secure the future.

Social Support

Engage positively with people in your social support network Example: "10/5 Way" of improving employee morale

Social

Friends, Family, Media, or etc...

Grit

Hardwork and determination a major indicator of success.

Motivation Through Others' Expectations

High expectations from others leads to high performance. Supervisors can communicate high or low expectations. Many do so unconsciously, but the expectations still affect supervisors and employee behavior.

indirect communication

Hinting at a message instead of expressing thoughts and feelings directly. p. 247

description

In terms of communication climate, a statement in which the speaker describes his/her position. p. 241

Motivation Through Incentives

Incentives focus on improving behaviors that will cut costs and increase customer satisfaction.

"I" language

Language that describes the speaker's position without evaluating others. Synonymous with Descriptive communication. p. 241

"You" language

Language that judges another person, increasing the likelihood of a defensive reaction. p. 241

Mcgregor's Theory Y

Managers are optimistic. Think workers are ambitious, serious, want to preform, self-directed, responsible.

McGregor's Theory X

Managers are pessimistic. Thinkers are lazy, unambitious, avoid responsibility. Must be goaded with pay or punishment.

evaluative communication

Messages in which the sender judges the receiver in some way, usually resulting in a defensive response. p. 241

controlling communication

Messages in which the sender tries to impose some sort of outcome on the receiver, usually resulting in a defensive reaction. p. 241

certainty

Messages that dogmatically imply that the speaker's position is correct and that the other person's ideas are not worth considering. Likely to generate a defensive response. p. 242

Motives are hierarchical

Motives vary in level of importance.

Interest

New interests require effort, increased attention, skills acquisition or other learning Motivate us to use our brains in different ways Necessary for personal growth

Emotional Competence

PERSONAL COMPETENCE -This term refers to the competencies that determine how we achieve and maintain emotional balance. The essential component of emotional intelligence is self-awareness, the ability to accurately read one's own emotions and hence be better equipped to assess one's level of emotional maturity SOCIAL COMPETENCE -This refers to the competencies that determine how we handle relationships. Sensing others' thoughts, feelings, and intentions; listening openly and sending convincing messages; and negotiating and resolving disagreements represent some of the competencies in this category

Emotional

Panic, fear, anger, love , or etc...

Motives are individualistic

People have different needs.

Believe

Perception is an important part

We become more successful when we are happier and more positive

Rather than success creating happiness, happiness seems to fuel performance and achievement

spiral

Reciprocal communication pattern in which each person's message reinforces the other's. p. 240

Millennials

Referred as Realistics, they are motivated by time off, meeting personal goals, and skill training, etc...

Matures

Referred as loyalists, they are motivated by, responsibility, control,and accomplishment, etc...

Baby Boomers

Referred as optimists, they are motivated by money, public recognition, and peer recognition, etc...

Generation X

Referred as skeptics, they are motivated by doing good, meeting organizational goals, and bonuses, etc...

The Sedona Method

STEP ONE -Focus on an issue you would like to feel better about. You may be experiencing guilt or fear. Allow yourself to feel whatever you are feeling at this moment. STEP TWO Ask yourself one of the following questions: Could I let this feeling go? Could I allow this feeling to be here? Could I welcome this feeling? STEP THREE Ask yourself this basic question: Would I? Am I willing to let go? STEP FOUR Ask yourself this simpler question: When?

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

Self Actualization, Esteem, Soccal or Belongingness, Safety and Security, Physiological (In this order with self as the first).

Achieve

Self-fulfilling prophecy reflects a connection between your expectations of yourself and what you achieve.

Empowerment

Sharing information, authority, and responsibility with lower ranks of an organization. Empowered employees experience a sense of pride, self-expression, and ownership. Not a quick fix/solution. And requires long-term commitment from top management down.

Gibb categories

Six sets of contrasting style of verbal and nonverbal behavior. Each set describes a communication style that is likely to arouse defensivenes and a contrasting style that is likely to prevent or reduce it. Developed by Jack Gibb. p. 240

Conceive

Suggests that motivation is determined by whether you believe you can be successful.

spontaneity

Supportive communication behavior in which the sender expresses a message without any attempt to manipulate the receiver. p. 242

empathy

The ability to project oneself into another person's point of view, so as to experience the other's thoughts and feelings. p. 242

communication climate

The emotional tone of a relationship as it is expressed in the messages that the partners send and receive. p. 236

Positive Reinforcement Defined

The goal of positive reinforcement is to encourage productive behaviors

nonassertion

The inability or unwillingness to express one's thoughts and feelings when necessary. p 245

Characteristics of Motives

The motivation behind a need can differ and change.

Motives Change

These will change throughout life.

Maintenance Factors

Things people consider essential to any job (Salaries, benefits, supervision, etc..) Do not motivate, but absence can be harmful.

Unconscious Influences

UNCONSCIOUS MIND -is a vast storehouse of forgotten memories, desires, ideas, and frustrations, according to William Menninger, founder of the famed Menninger Foundation. -It contains memories of past experiences as well as memories of feelings associated with past experiences. The unconscious is active, continuously influencing conscious decision-making processes -we often relive the experience in a context very different from the one we experienced as a child TRANSNATIONAL ANALYSIS -theory developed by Eric Berne whereby he concluded that, from the day of birth, the brain acts like a two-track stereo tape recorder. One track records events, and the other records the feelings associated with those events.

Motives are often inferred

We can observe behaviors but must make inferences about motives that cause them .

Motives may be unconscious

We may be unaware of feelings or desires.

equality

When communicators show that they believe others have just as much worth as human beings. p. 242

Serenity

a mindful state that carries the urge to savor your current circumstances and find ways to integrate them into your life more fully

Job enrichment

an attempt to make a job more desirable and satisfying.

Job enlargement

involves expanding an employee's responsibilities, new skills acquisition.

reinforcer

is any stimulus that follows a response and increases the probability that the response will occur again

Cynicism

mistrusting attitude regarding the motives of people -Constantly on guard against the "misbehavior" of others -Thinking that everyone is screwing up, acting inconsiderately, or otherwise behaving inappropriately

Physiological

need for food, water, or sleep etc...

Peer Group

people one's own age

Empathizer

people with the ability to imagine themselves in someone else's position and understand what that person is feeling -Able to understand the subtleties of human interaction

Preoccupation with the Self

prevents some from giving positive reinforcement -If you want attention and appreciation, learn to give it

Reference Group

several people who share a common interest, tending to influence each other's attitudes and behaviors

Culture

sum total of knowledge, beliefs, values, objects, and ethnic customs that we use to adapt to our environment -Includes both tangible items (food, clothing and furniture) and intangible concepts (education and laws) -Today's organizations are striving to create corporate cultures that attract and keep productive workers

Pride

the emotional high that follows performance and success

Socialization

the process through which people are integrated into society by exposure to the actions and opinions of others

Attitudes

thoughts that you have accepted as true and that lead you to think, feel, or act positively or negatively toward a person, idea, or event -Your values, those beliefs and preferences you feel are important, serve as a foundation for your attitudes

Group Think

when everyone shares the same opinion; a major deterrent to controlling your own attitude