fAHMY 3030 === > LEWIS CAROL 4
Gracious me!
!
' Then— 'Oh, Bruno, 00 mustn't dog's-ear the daisies!
' Did 00 learn oor spelling wiz daisies.
' (The way that you began, Sir), In such a case your course is clear— '0/2 the bat's bac\, my little dear!
' Is the appropriate answer.
'Oh, I know!
' said Bruno.
Isn't it a darling?
'' cried Bruno.
One result of his not looking where he was going was that he tripped up, as he crossed the Saloon, flew up into the air, and fell heavily on his face in the middle of the table.
''What a pity!
said the Earl, as I was about to follow the Count.
''You are not a guest, you know!
And, perhaps, if you're very good, w^hen dinnertime comes, you'll have a little dinner, and no more whipping!
'(How^ very kind he was!
And bitter was that Pig's reply, ''Because I cannot jump!
'* That Frog he grinned a grin of glee, And hit his chest a thump.
What is this bellowing about?
'* That Pig replied, with quivering snout, Because I cannot jumpI'' That Camel scanned him, dreamy-eyed, ''Methin\s you are too plump.
The notion had occurred to her, The children would be happier, If they were taught to vary.
'*The notion soon became a craze; And, when it once began, she Brought us all out in different ways — One was a Pixy, two were Fays, Another was a Banshee; 840 VERSE The Fetch and Kelpie went to school And gave a lot of trouble; Next came a Poltergeist a
For instance, if I were to say 'Here we are!
', that would be accepted without any contradiction, and it's a nice sort of remark to begin a conversation with.
So it would be an Axiom, Or again, supposing I were to say, 'Here we are not!
', that would be— —a fib!
Doesn't *Apple-Tree' always begin with ^Eh!
'?
' The Lamb's speech.
'Oh, indeed, Sir, I will, Sir!
) Bruno's speech to the Lion.
'Oh, indeed.
I said, vainly trying to disguise the involuntary bitterness of my tone.
'The funeral ba\ed meats did coldly furnish forth the marriage-tablesy I could not help repeating to myself.
'* On me the first effect of her voice was a sudden sharp pang that seemed to pierce through one's very heart.
(I had felt such a pang only once before in my life, and it had been from seeing what, at the moment, realised one's idea of perfect beauty—it was in a London exhibition, where, in making my way through a crowd, I suddenly met, face to face, a child of qu
And squeeze them till they nearly choke.
(I said It serves them right!
I never did see So uncivil a clown!
(Query.
Sylvie found him a rather uninteresting neighbour: in fact, she couldn't afterwards remember that he had made more than one remark to her during the whole banquet, and that was What a comfort a Dictionary is!
(She told Bruno, afterwards, that she had been too much afraid of him to say more than Yes, Sirin reply; and that had been the end of their conversation.
Aha,said he, we're getting grand!
(Taking a bottle in his hand) I'll soon arrange for that!
And you won't tell it?
(whimpers) Then you're very cross!
Because he could not jump, A certain Cam-el heard him shout— A Camel with a hump.
*'0h, is it Grief, or is it Gout?
told his story of woe In an antediluvian tone.
*'My father and mother were honest, though poor— Skip all that!
' I'm getting rather hoarse, I fear.
After so much reciting: So, if you don't object, my dear, We'll try a glass of bitter beer — I think it looks inviting.
One fact I can tell, if you're willing to hear, He never attended a Parliament Session, For I'm certain that if he had ever been there, Full quickly would he have changed his ideas, With the hissings, the hootings, the groans and the cheers.
And as to his name it is pretty clear That it wasn't me and it wasn't you!
At one end of the table there was a large plum-pudding.
And at the other end there was a nice roasted Lamb!
And again it was hard to check the wish to say more : but I was not yet sure of a sympathetic listener.
And have you any theory as to what sort of place they would occupy in Creation?
So, to reward him for his run (As it was baking hot.
And he was over twenty stone).
I can see right through it when I hold it up to the sky.
And it isn't red a bit: it's, oh such a lovely blue!
But there was nothing on it but a big whip.
And they had such a whipping!
) 'It's not in Nursery Rhymes?
And yet I almost think it is — 'Three little Ghosteses' were set 'On posteses,' you know, and ate Their 'buttered toasteses.
O Pig,he said, be ruled by me.
And you shall see what you shall see.
' But, when they got into the room, they saw the most lovely dinner!
(Buns?
As of dogs that howl in concert, As of cats that wail in chorus.
But my Hiawatha's patience, His politeness and his patience, Unaccountably had vanished.
) And folk who sup on things like these— He muttered, eggs and bacon — Lobster—and duck—and toasted cheese — If they don't get an awful squeeze, I'm very much mistaken!
He is immensely fat, and so Well suits the occupation: In point of fact, if you must know, We used to call him vears ago.
The Lord Chancellor wrung his hands in despair.
He is mad, good people!
the Bellman said.
He is shouting like mad, only hark!
''He hoiked again—come up then!
He loo\ed again, and found it was—woa back!
He opened the door of the cupboard wide: and there he was, the Other Professor, sitting in a chair, with a book on his knee, and in the act of helping himself to a nut from a dish, which he had taken down off a shelf just within his reach.
He looked round at us, but said nothing till he had cracked and eaten the nut.
It's the thing what wrenches people out of their boots!
He means ^bootjack,' Sylvie explained in a whisper.
It may mean—death!
He met her gaze without flinching.
I will play him once again so as that to show you what I mean.
He returned to the piano, but the song had vanished.
0£ course you can't leave children free,Said I, to pick and choose: But, in the case of men like me, I think 'Mine Host' might fairly be Allowed to state his views.
He said It really wouldn't pay — Folk are so full of fancies.
A note has just been left for you, Sir, by the baker's boy.
He said he was passing the Hall, and they asked him to come round and leave it here.
And that was to tingle his bell.
He was thoughtful and grave—but the orders he gave Were enough to bewilder a crew.
Everybody had forgotten Prince Uggug!
He was told of the Banquet, of course?
First the Governor, the Father : He suggested velvet curtains Looped about a massy pillar; And the corner of a table, Of a rosewood dining-table.
He would hold a scroll of something.
And that, after all, Is the thing that one needs with a Snark.
He would joke with hyaenas, returning their stare With an impudent wag of the head: And he once went a walk, paw-in-paw, with a bear, Just to keep up its spirits,he said.
Then we will cautiously unhook the weight: and, if it still shows (as perhaps it will) a slight tendency to fall, we will hook it on to the chain again, and leave it for another thousand years.
Here the Empress experienced one of those flashes of Common Sense which were the surprise of all around her.
Hip!
Hip!
One can easily guess,said the Professor.
His Imperial Fatness is, without doubt, a little preoccupied.
Please your Highness!
His Imperial Fatness is—Not a word more could he utter.
My own, my gentle Salmon!
Chorus Salmon, come up!
' Down came the little Foxes!
Clean pinafores!
There, that'll do—be off to bed!
Don't gape like that, you dunce!
I stepped in, and took a seat on the bench in the porch.
Fm glad to see you looking so hearty,I began.
Rule on, as Emperor, and rule wisely.
For I am chosen King of Elfland.
II A stick I found that weighed two pound: I sawed it up one day In pieces eight of equal weight!
How much did each piece weigh ?
And the clothes he had bought for the trip.
He had forty-two boxes, all carefully packed, With his name painted clearly on each: But, since he omitted to mention the fact, They were all left behind on the beach.
'The Fox has taken the Lamb to his house with him!
I'm sure he means to eat it!
'' The story came to an end so suddenly, it almost took my breath away ; however I did my best to make a pretty speech of thanks.
I'm sure it's very—very—very much so, I'm sure!
Rich dresser of suet!
Prime hand at a sausage!
Shall I say it?
If you've finished inventing it,said Sylvie.
Little Birds are teaching Tigresses to smile.
Innocent of guile: Smile, I say, not smirl^le— Mouth a semicircle, That's the proper style.
Eric followed me down the stairs, and out into the night.
Is it Life or Death?
she asked him.
Is my face enough in profile ?
That man of yours will never earn His living as a waiter!
Is that queer thing supposed to burn?
Then he asked the old question.
Is the Lecture all ready?
' '' You've been months over that song,said the Professor.
Isn't it finished yet?
(Sylvie paused to take breath, and Bruno lay back among the daisies, and looked at me triumphantly.
Isn't it grand^ Mister Sir?
There's a sentence or two more.
Isn't there, Bruno?
I don't know why,'' she said.
It always does, if it's got a fairy-child on it.
he shouted.
It was done.
said Sylvie, rather shocked at such violent language.
It wasn't quite so bad as that!
But, if a little fat juicy—' Bruno could bear no more.
Pretend he wasn't juicy!
It would be horrid to be two or three boys!
P'raps they wouldn't play with me!
According to the number Of Ghosts that they accommodate: (The Tenant merely counts as weighty With Coals ^nd other lumber).
PHANTASMAGORIA 829 This is a 'one-ghost' house, and you, When you arrived last summer.
Little Birds are tasting Gratitude and gold.
Pale with sudden cold Pale, I say, and wrin\led— When the bells have tingled, And the Tale is told.
I sayde not that—I answere Noe— Yt lacketh such, I woote: Yt ys a mutton-saddel, loe!
Parte of ye fleecye brute.
^ The system of return tickets is an excellent one.
People are conveyed, on particular days, there and back again for one fare.
Som^ writer tells us that is the acme of human happiness.
Plenty of bodily rest, at any rate!
' And the Lamb said 'But you never eat them, do you.
Sir?
How slight the barriers seem to be that part Christian from Christian, when one has to deal with the great facts of Life and the reality of Death!
So it must be, and so it should be—Arthur was beginning, when the front-door bell rang, suddenly and violently.
Be you come to see the platform?
Aye, aye!
My proper name Is Tibbets—Tibbets?
Aye, the same.
Doos that mean 'munch'?
Bruno whispered to Sylvie.
Mathematics, for instance: that seems to possess an endless interest: one ca'n't imagine any form of Life, or any race of intelligent beings, where Mathematical truth would lose its meaning.
But I fear Medicine stands on a different footing.
Bruno exclaimed triumphantly.
But I have invented a lovely one!
Bruno solemnly whispered to me.
But Sylvie overheard him.
A few jokes, you know, Professor—just to put people at their ease!
True, true.
he said.
Try some cowslip wine!
Of course it would be an Axiom, if the Professor said it!
THE PROFESSOR S LECTURE 707 —that would be accepted, if people were civil,continued the Professor; so it would be another Axiom.
James woke and said it gave him pain ; So gave it back to John again.
The box was not with lid supplied.
And now the knight hath mounted, Before the admiring band, Hath got the stirrups on his feet.
The bridle in his hand.
For England expects—I forbear to proceed : 'Tis a maxim tremendous, but trite: And you'd best be unpacking the things that you need To rig yourselves out for the fight.
Then the Banker endorsed a blank cheque (which he crossed).
The Professor beckoned to the Head-Cook, and said something to him in a low voice.
Then the Head-Cook left the room, followed by all the other cooks.
the Jury all groaned And some of them fainted away.
Then the Snark pronounced sentence, the Judge being quite Too nervous to utter a word : When it rose to its feet, there was silence like night.
The Professor was evidently surprised, though he tried not to show it.
This must be looked into,he muttered to himself, taking out a note-book.
What did you see in the box?
Sylvie eagerly enquired.
The Lecture you were getting ready—ever so long ago?
Sylvie enquired.
So he didn't mind.
Sylvie went on.
Sylvie considered this for a moment : then she saw her way out of it.
Well, then, ask him to give me some!
There's nothing more to be done now^ is there?
Well, there's the dinner to finish,the Professor said with a bewildered smile: and the heat to bear.
The Other Professor looked thoroughly puzzled.
Well, well!
And the Cow said 'Moo!
What are you going to do with all that Milk?
But no result followed.
What does an Apple-Tree begin with, when it wants to speak?
I told him of the Lecture and the Banquet—.
What followed?
And men saw with wonder that a change had passed over the old beggar, even as he spoke.
What had seemed, but now, to be vile rags and splashes of mud, were seen to be in truih kingly trappings, broidered with gold, and sparkling with gems.
It aren't in there,he said, with such unusual solemnity, that Sylvie's curiosity was roused.
What is in there, Bruno?
I should think I save forty pounds a year by giving —oh, what a twinge of pain!
What is it?
Well, / aren't a frog,said Bruno.
What shall I sing?
Why, of course it is!
What would Medicine, be if it wasn't nasty?
said the King.
What's the matter with the Prince?
When must it be, sweet love?
To-morrow morning,he repUed.
Bruno put in.
Yes,said Sylvie, meekly accepting the new verb.
' Bruno was listening intently: and, when Sylvie paused to take breath, he could only just gasp out the words About the Bread?
Yes,said Sylvie, the Bread comes next.
He was indeed a pitiable object: the rags, that hung about him, were all splashed with mud: his white hair and his long beard were tossed about in wild disorder.
Yet he walked upright, with a stately tread, as if used to command: and—strangest sight of all—Sylvie and Bruno came with him, clinging to his hands, and gazing at him with looks of silent love.
She felt her cold was getting worse.
Yet still she fondly whispered, Oh, take your time, my Simon, although I've waited long.
Two excellent Policies, one Against Fire And one Against Damage From Hail.
Yet still, ever after that sorrowful day, Whenever the Butcher was by.
If I were to unhook this weight, and let go, it would fall to the ground.
You do not deny that?
684 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED It is very peaceful,I said.
You got my letter?
Why couldn't you have told me so Three quarters of an hour ago.
You prince of all the asses ?
If after this he says no more, You'd best perhaps curtail your Exertions—go and shake the door, And then, if he begins to snore.
You'll know the thing's a failure.
Bravo!
You're guessing well to-day!
' Miss Crabb, My dear Miss Verjuice, can it really be?
You're just in time, love, for a cup of tea; And so, you went to see those people play.
*'And when you've learned to squeak, my man, And caught the double sob.
You're pretty much where you began : Just try and gibber if you can!
full.
^ merrily.
^ heavy.
^ sounds.
said Bruno.
^'Havent I, Sylvie?
?
^None since this morning,the Earl said, looking very grave.
The one that had been put through the mind-mangle, you know.
^The little man that had a little gun,' I think it was.
That's something li\e a job!
^Tve tried it, and can only say I'm sure you couldn't do it, even if you practised night and day, Unless you have a turn that way.
Just look at this set, now.
^Under'Coo\ Number Thirteen recovered from Common Fever—Fehris Communis' And now see what's pinned to it.
What can have become of it.
^exclaimed Lady Muriel.
among the papers of the well-known author of Was it You or I?
a tragedy, and the two popular novels, Sister and Son,and The Niece's Legacy, or the Grateful Grandfather.
As devoted to your Imperial Highness as ever!
he said in a weak voice.
Taste it!
he said, holding out the jug to Bruno.
But there must be two more chairs here!
he said, looking down at the Gardener.
No, indeed I aren't!
he said.
He would answer to ''Hi!
or to any loud cry.
Why, of course he has!
replied the Professor.
And the man they called Hi!
replied, with a sigh, I informed you the day we embarked.
The Second tells us what is right In ceremonious calls: — 'First burn a blue or crimson light' (A thing I quite forgot to-night), 'Then scratch the door or walls,' PHANTASMAGORIA 833 I said You'll visit here no more, If you attempt the Guy.
ril have no bonfires on my floor — And, as for scratching at the door, I'd like to see you try!
Do 00 think he caught the Fox, Mister Sir?
said Bruno.
But how did he come back on the chimney-piece after his first tumble?
said the Empress.
I've put an extra beam under it!
said the Gardener^ 702 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED patting it affectionately as he spoke.
' What a fat cat it is!
said the Lord Chancellor, leaning across the Professor to address his small neighbour, It's quite a wonder!
Why should they?
said the Other Professor, suddenly waking up out of a deep reverie.
I hope it isn't that Porcupine breaking loose!
she exclaimed.
EARLY VERSE 809 PHOTOGRAPHY EXTRAORDINARY The Milk^and-Water School Alas!
she would not hear my prayer!
The Strong-Minded or Matter-oj-Fact School Well!
so my offer was no go!
I am surprised!
the Empress said to Bruno.
Forgive us!
the Empress, kneeling at her husband's side, meekly repeated.
He never remembers to ask that first!
the Professor whispered to the children.
For I'm sure it is nothing but hovel*' That are pretty!
the little fellow exclaimed, as the children passed us—so closely that we drew back a little 1 GAMMON AND SPINACH 695 to make room for them, and it seemed we had only to reach out a hand to touch them: but this we did not attempt.
Have you the Jewel still, my child?
the old man was saying.
Brother!
turning to the Emperor, I have some business to arrange with you to-night.
the Professor went on quickly, but only just in time to check the Hooroar!
which was beginning.
D.
whose mortal remains lie buried by the sea: whose spirit has returned to God who gave it.
Miss Verjuice, Well!
yes.
I'll try To tell you all the painful history.
{They whisper alternately behind a small fan.
To trimwas not a phrase I could Remember having heard: Perhaps,I said, you'll be so good As tell me what is understood Exactly by that word?
» It means the loosening all the doors, The Ghost replied, and laughed: It means the drilling holes by scores In all the skirting-boards and floors, To make a thorough draught.
In the far future—Who can say?
— You may be fit to jump.
the Head-Cook began enthusiastically.
—but not inebriates!
After such a catastrophe, it would be sure to be covered with black stains—and he would say: — The result of that combination—you may have noticed?
—was an Explosion!
It's difficult to get things started,the Professor remarked to Bruno.
When once we get started, it'll go on all right, you'll see.
Bruno!
Where are you, my darUng?
The method employed I would gladly explain.
While I have it so clear in my head.
And you —do you forbid me to go?
Will you not spare me, my own beloved one?
I corrected myself, perceiving at once that that guess was wrong, at any rate.
''Something about a bird of some \indr Lady Muriel repeated, with as much withering scorn as her sweet face was capable of conveying.
And then he said 'Open your mouth again, you wicked little thing!
' And he shook, and shook!
' And it said *ril call again to-morrow.
' And it said 'Give my love to the Cat.
The Cat's welly kind to Mouses.
' And it said *But I's got some imporkant business, what I must attend to.
I never nubble little Boys' heads oflf, as I used to do.
' And so Bruno said 'Don't you really, Sir?
Well, so this Boy said 'Now it's my Birthday!
' And so—I'm tired!
' And the Sheep said 'Yes, if it's learnt all its lessons.
' And the Lamb said 'Oh yes.
Have you learnt A?
' And the Lamb said 'Oh yes.
Oh, you've no idea what a delicious thing it is—a nice roasted Lamb!
' And the Lamb said 'Oh, if you please.
I want to wash my paws!
' And the Lion said 'Well, go down the hill, and wash them in the brook, yonder.
Then what do you live on?
' And the Lion— Oo see he weren't a bit flightened!
) And he said 'Eldest little THE LITTLE FOXES 657 Fox, have you been eating the Bread?
' And the eldest Httle Fox said *No no no!
So Bruno said 'Eldest little Fox, have you been eating the Apples?
' And the eldest little Fox said *No no no!
' ^Second Uttle Fox, have you been eating the Bread?
' And the second Uttle Fox only said *Wauch!
' And the eldest little Fox said 'Whihuauch!
' And then Bruno saw there was only its mouth in the hamper!
' And the Lion said 'I'll come as quick as ever I can!
' And they trotted down the hill.
Dinner, dinner, dinner!
' And when the little Foxes came down—(Had they clean pinafores on?
And then I shall be glad to hear — If you will say them loud and clear — The Rules that you allude to.
''Thanks!
The Lecture comes first,he said.
''That the Empress insists on.
replied the Chancellor.
''That would be the duty of the Gold Stick in Waiting.
was the earnest protest of a knot of two or three gentlemen, who had been grouped round the door (one of them actually leaning against it) for the last half-hour, as they declared.
''This door has not been opened since the song began!
she added, with an affectionate warmth that went to my very heart.
''Vor those are jew we hold as dearT Good night!
I was there myself, that day.
''Was you, now?
It came out in a 'Monthly,' or At least my agent said it did: Some literary swell, who saw It, thought it seemed adapted for The Magazine he edited.
'*My father was a Brownie, Sir; My mother was a Fairy.
Permit me to explain.
'Don't-care' and *Care' were twin-brothers.
Man can still claim certain monopolies—for instance, such a use A FAIRY-DUET 687 of language as enables us to utilise the work of many, by 'division of labour.
' But the belief, that we have a monopoly of Reason, has long been swept away.
Inspecting Ghosts is something new!
' Explain yourself, my man!
The title of it is 'The Pig-Tale.
' He never recited it before!
But how do you know it's kind to the Mouses—or, more correctly speaking, the Mice?
'' 'cause it plays with the Mouses,said Bruno; for to amuse them, 00 know.
You do not deny that?
'' Again, nobody denied it.
What would the Banquet be without him?
'' Ever so much nicer,said Bruno.
I have seen them—and in this very wood!
'' Lady Muriel asked no more questions.
Surely she need not have sent for me for that!
'' Lady Muriel met me in the passage.
Oh, yes!
'' Sylvie exclaimed with unusual eagerness.
He means you!
'' Sylvie whispered back.
So hit him again!
'' TO THE rescue!
Chapter XXII The Banquet ''Heaviness may endure for a night: but joy cometh in the morning.
'' The next day found me quite another being.
It is exactly the size of the common Mouse — Mus Communis!
'' There was a general rush to the tubes, and the spectators watched with delight the minikin creature, as it playfully coiled its trunk round the Professor's extended finger, finally taking its stand upon the palm of his hand, while he carefully lifted i
There was a general rush to the sides of the Pavilion, and all eyes were turned to the open end, watching for the return of the Gardener, who had gone away singing ''He thought he saw ari Elephant That practised on a Fife!
'' There was silence for a minute: and then his harsh voice was heard again in the distance.
I mean(and the light bantering tone suddenly changed to one o£ deep seriousness) would they be capable of sin?
'' They can reason—on a lower level, perhaps, than men and women—never rising, I think, above the faculties of a child; and they have a moral sense, most surely.
I said ''That's very curious!
'' Well, it IS curious, I agree.
Why, it seems to explain everything!
'' Well, not quite everything^' the Professor modestly rejoined.
Isn't the platform lovely?
'' he asked, as we entered the Pavilion.
Such as it isn't what?
'' he peevishly enquired.
(What do 'behold' mean?
'' said Bruno.
It lives on cherries, and marmalade—' —and apples!
'' said Bruno.
I'm sure it didn't!
'' said Sylvie.
Help me to do what?
'' said the puzzled Professor, looking up for a moment, but keeping his finger on the book he was reading from, so as not to lose his place.
After a 704 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED moment's thought he strengthened the remark.
''Everything,'' he said, addressing Society in general, is very much to be regretted!
said the Earl.
''Many of our religious difficulties are merely deductions from unwarranted assumptions.
I whispered to Bruno.
''Middling kind,Bruno corrected me gravely.
Banish sin, and you banish them all!
''Military science is a yet stronger instance,said the Earl.
Muriel — my darling—they — want me—down in the harbour.
''Must you go?
suddenly.
''Please go on!
Bruno boldly replied.
''Should he, Sylvie?
Bruno said with great solemnity.
'Eldest little Fox,' Sylvie said, dropping the narrative-form in her eagerness, 'You've been so good that I can hardly believe you've been disobedient: but I'm afraid you've been eating your little sister?
) The Lion's speech to Bruno.
'Now, Bruno, take those little Foxes home with you, and teach them to be good obedient little Foxes!
) Bruno's speech to the little Foxes.
'Now, little Foxes, you're going to have your first lesson in being good.
And then Bruno stood the little Foxes up against the wall : and he made them a little speech.
'Now, little Foxes, you've begun very wickedly—and you'll have to be punished.
' said Bruno's picnic 649 Bruno.
'Oh, I know!
I'll tell you what happened on my wedding-day—' I like this part better,said Bruno, patting my cheek to keep me awake.
'There was, oh, such a lovely wedding-breakfast!
And at last Bruno rang the big bell again.
'Tingle, tingle, tingle!
You will find I have told it you twice.
'Tis the song of the Jubjub!
The King proceeded, half in fun, To knight him on the spot.
'Twas a great liberty to take!
It had somehow contrived to lose count, And the only thing now was to rack its poor brains By reckoning up the amount.
'Two added to one—if that could but be done,It said, with one's fingers and thumbs!
Not a bit!
'Twould be a job to drive one wild, To satisfy one single child — There'd be no end to it!
(jumping and clapping her hands) I'd say *HOW NICE!
'W.
Thump!
'Whatever is that?
' said Bruno.
'Why, it's only my Watch a-ticking!
Why, that's the way cats show they're pleased!
'^ Bruno looked doubtful.
It ca'n't have Introductory Verses at the end^ can it.
'^said Sylvie.
Bruno said to me, patting my cheek again.
'cause he remembered to call it 'Sir,' 00 know.
The house is all in an uproar.
(And oo'd better bring an uproar-glass wiz oo!
' And when Bruno looked into its mouth, it was half full of Bread, and half full of Fox!
(Bruno said nothing in the pause this time.
' and the Lamb went away.
(But 00 needn't go away!
819 820 VERSE V Three sisters at breakfast were feeding the cat, The first gave it sole—Puss was grateful for that : The next gave it salmon—which Puss thought a treat The third gave it herring—which Puss wouldn't eat.
(Explain the conduct of the cat.
Bruno interrupted.
(He was evidently anxious for the reputation of his namesake.
The well-remembered voice he knew, He smiled, he faintly muttered Sue!
(Her very name was legal too.
' And the Lion went away.
(It gets betterer and betterer, now,Bruno whispered to me, right away to the end!
' And Bruno looked into its mouth, and its mouth was full of Bread!
(It might have chokeded it,said Bruno.
' And he went a little further.
(Now comes the most interesting part,Bruno whispered.
) And when Bruno opened the hamper again, what do you think he saw?
(Only two Foxes!
But there was an old law, which he did not dare to disobey, which said that there must always be PUZZLES FROM WONDERLAND 82I Seven blind of both eyes: Two blind of one eye : Four that see with both eyes : Nine that see with one eye.
(Query.
Don't say it's not, because It's known as well as Bradshaw's Guide!
(The Ghost uneasily replied He hardly thought it was.
' before you go away!
(They run away hand in hand,) Feb.
*Triends, Romans, and countrymen, lend me your ears!
(They were all of them fond of quotations: So they drank to his health, and they gave him three cheers.
Oh, Bruno!
(This was a whisper from Sylvie.
Oh, I know all that you're going to say!
(This was to Arthur, who appeared about to interrupt her.
Thy name is Woman!
(puts his arm round her coaxingly) Well, Birdie, then I'll tell!
W.
(stretching up his arms, with a mock-heroic air) Oh, Curiosity!
(He heaved a sigh.
) ''They are the ghost-nobility, And look on us with scorn.
' (Bruno cuddled a little closer to her.
) 'And, if a little thin scraggy Boy came by, why, I used to let him go.
And the Lion begged pardon, and said it wouldn't nubble off little boys' heads —not never no more!
644 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Bruno looked much pleased at this change of events.
And what should it be but a great Lion!
650 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED A great big Lion,Bruno corrected her.
' And the Fox said 'Oh, no!
654 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED What, eat a Lamb?
Weird wailings of woe!
672 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED They echo without him, within him: They thrill through his whis\ers and beard: Lil^e a teetotum seeming to spin him, With sneers never hitherto sneered.
TO THE rescue!
677 And to God's poor,she added.
TO THE rescue!
67I In stature the Munlet was dwarfish— No burly big Blunderbore he: And he wearily gazed on the crawfish His Wifelet had dressed for his tea.
The wisest answer to most of them, is, I think, 'behold, we \now not anything' You mentioned 'division of labour,' just now,I said.
688 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Surely it is carried to a wonderful perfection in a hive of bees?
Dip in your finger, and taste it!
698 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Bruno did so, and made such an excruciatingly wry face that Sylvie exclaimed, in alarm, Oh, Bruno, you mustn't!
Bruno retorted.
712 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Our First Experiment requires a Machine.
Oh, that would never do!
A Servant would be dismissed at once^ who was ill on the wrong day!
That Spectre left you on the Third — Since then you've not been haunted: For, as he never sent us word, 'Twas quite by accident we heard That anv one was wanted.
A Spectre has first choice, by right.
When thou'rt awake, thou weepest!
I took my sister t'other day (Excuse the slang expression) To Sadler's Wells to see the play In hopes the new impression Might in her thoughts, from grave to gay Effect some slight digression.
said he.
I tried hard to assume a critical tone.
'' 838 , VERSE And here he took a careful aim, And gaily cried Here goes!
I tried to dodge it as it came, But somehow caught it, all the same, Exactly on my nose.
To joke about the weather — To ventilate the last ''on dit— To quote the price of leather — She groaned Here I and Sorrow sit: Let us lament together!
I urged You're wasting time, you know Delay will spoil the venison.
And so, as they went along, the Lion said 'Oh, I'll tell you what I used to do when I was a young Lion.
I used to hide behind trees, to watch for little Boys.
Well, I will leave you here,she said.
I want to get back before dark: and I have a cottage-friend to visit, first.
Mister Sir?
I want to hear about that Boy's Birthday,I said.
'' Nice,said Bruno.
I was going to say—the Professor faltered, rather taken aback by the promptness of Bruno's reply, —that that would never do!
Ma!
I went to the A-field, and I helped them to make A!
Ma!
I went to the Cside, and I saw the ships sailing on the C!
And without extra charge I will give you at large A Lesson in Natural History.
In his genial way he proceeded to say (Forgetting all laws of propriety, And that giving instruction, without introduction.
Made of sliding, folding rosewood; Neatly put it all together.
In its case it lay compactly, Folded into nearly nothing; PHANTASMAGORIA 857 But he opened out the hinges, Pushed and pulled the joints and hinges.
It isn't that!
It's 'cause 'nubbly' 's such a grumbly word to say — when one person's got her head on another person's shoulder.
They beheld him—their Baker—their hero unnamed — On the top of a neighbouring crag, Erect and sublime, for one moment of time, In the next, that wild figure they saw (As if stung by a spasm) plunge into a chasm, While they waited and listened in awe.
It's a Snark!
Ca'n't,said Bruno.
It's a bony word.
Upon that ruined Pump!
It's a miserable story!
'' Bruno repeated.
It's a sort of punishment, I think!
) ^'Of fish, a whale's the one for me, It is so full of blubberT The night's performance was King John.
It's dull,she wept, and so-so!
When she talks like that,he exclaimed to me, the talking goes down bofe sides of my face—all the way to my chin—and it doos tickle so!
It's enough to make a beard grow, that it is!
You might have suggested it then?
It's excessively awkward to mention it now — As I think I've already remarked.
If only you'd spoken before!
It's excessively awkward to mention it now, With the Snark, so to speak, at the door!
he said.
It's just like a little red star!
THE PIG-TALE 729 Ta\e, oh ta\e this shilling!
Let us have no moreV Little Birds are bathing Crocodiles in cream, Like a happy dream: Li\e, but not so lasting— Crocodiles, tvhen fasting.
Not much better, I fear : but no worse, I am thankful to say.
Let us sit here awhile, and have a quiet chat,she said.
But it was no common lamplight into which I now stepped, with a strange, new, dreamy sensation of some subtle witchery that had come over the place.
Light, richer and more golden than any lamp could give, flooded the room, streaming in from a w^indow I had somehow never noticed before, and lighting up a group of three shadowy 748 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED figures, that grew momently more distinct—a g
It never has effect enough To make it worth the trouble.
Long bills soon quenched the little thirst I had for being funny.
Oh, there goes the church-clock, the town-clock, the station-clock and there go the other clocks, they are all striking twelve!
Oh, Simon, it is getting late, it's very dull to sit and wait.
Sylvie enquired, as we followed.
Oh, certainly!
My Simon!
Oh, charming man!
He had taken up one of the bottles, and was carefully reading the label through his eye-glass.
Our first Specimen—he announced, as he placed the bottle in front of the other Things, is — that is, it is called—here he took it up, and examined the label again, as if he thought it might have changed since he last saw it, is called Aqua Pura—com
Silently she paced at my side, with head bowed down and hands A FAIRY-DUET 69I clasped tightly together.
Only, as my tale went on, she drew a little short quick breath now and then, like a child panting with delight.
Go on, Bruno,I said, you say it much the best.
Only—but — one—Fox!
cried Bruno.
Oo doosn't know how to keep birthdays!
Bruno retorted.
Oo just try me!
It's grand,I said: but it frightens one so!
Oo may sit a little closer to me^ if 00 like,said Bruno.
On which Bruno expressed a very decided opinion that that wasn't worth calling a conversationat all.
Oo should have asked him a riddle!
he said.
Oo shouldn't have any wrong peppermints in the tray!
It's not a good way,he objected.
Oo wouldn't say / were pleased, if I made that noise in my throat!
804 VERSE Fs mighty wicked, that I is!
Or how could such things be?
Still, if he often quits his post.
Or is not a well-mannered Ghost, Then you can have him changed.
I sometimes dig for buttered rolls.
Or set limed twigs for crabs; I sometimes search the flowery knolls For wheels of hansom cabs.
Or will ye run me a race ?
Or will ye go up to yonder bridge, And there we will angle for dace?
Now you might press those two knobs together—but that's not the way to do it.
Or you might turn the Machine upside-down—but that's not the way to do it!
Then the cake!
Ordinary plum!
There isn't room!
Our Second Experiment,the Professor announced.
Sae sed, sae dune : ye stonderes ^ hearde Fou many a mickle ^ stroke, Sowns ^ lyke ye flappynge of a birde, A struggle an a choke.
Owte of ye cave scarce fette ^ they ytte, Wi pow ^ an push and hau' ^ — Whereof YVe drawne a littel bytte, Bot durst not draw ytte au.
Well, since you are so kind, I'll try A little bit df duck.
PHANTASMAGORIA 83I 0/2^ slice!
Giving one such strange expressions — Sullen, stupid, pert expressions.
Really anyone would take us (Anyone that did not know us) For the most unpleasant people!
They returned hand-in-hand, and the Bellman, unmanned (For a moment) with noble emotion, Said This amply repays all the wearisome days We have spent on the billowy ocean!
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 773 Such friends, as the Beaver and Butcher became, Have seldom if ever been know^n; In w^inter or summer, 'twas always the same — You could never meet either alone.
Faint odours of departed cheese, Blown on the dank, unwholesome breeze, Awoke the never-ending sneeze.
Strange pictures decked the arras drear, Strange characters of woe and fear.
Now do be cool and take a nap!
Such a ridiculous old chap Was never seen before!
In platitudes luscious and limp.
Such as dec\, with a deathless adorning, The Song of the Shrimp!
Even the little boots did not miss their share of favorable criticism.
Such natty little things!
'Tingle, tingle, tingle!
Supper, supper, supper!
It's a very difHcult sort to invent, I find.
Suppose Bruno tells one, first.
What did he say, Bruno?
Sylvie enquired, as soon as we were safely out of hearing.
''Good little boy!
Sylvie exclaimed.
Oo shouldn't leave out so many vs^ords!
Sylvie humbly apologised.
Don't ask so many questions!
Sylvie interposed, anxious to save the poor old man from further bewilderment.
' It said—It hadn't time to say such a lot of things!
Sylvie interrupted indignantly.
» Oh, Bruno!
Sylvie interrupted, almost sadly.
' And another was—Oh, Bruno!
Sylvie interrupted.
he murmured fretfully.
Sylvie looked to me for instructions.
ore milk in.
Sylvie looked unconvinced: however it seemed quite impossible for her ever to refuse what her brother asked : so she quietly filled her saucer with milk, and handed it to Bruno, who got down off his chair to administer it to the cat.
May I take it in my hand?
Sylvie nodded : and Bruno carried it off to the window, and held it aloft against the sky, whose deepening blue was already spangled with stars.
Go on, Sylvie!
Sylvie patiently took up the thread of the story again.
We'd like to, very much!
Sylvie replied.
Bruno corrected her, And he never did nothing he wasn't told to do— ''That doesn't make a good Boy!
Sylvie said contemptuously.
I won't do it again!
Sylvie said very humbly.
The one you didn't choose!
Sylvie took it from him, with a puzzled look, and held it, now up to the light, now down.
Where did you get that cake?
Sylvie whispered to Bruno.
Soon he came running back in some excitement.
Sylvie!
Sylvie knows it best.
Sylvie's grown-upper than me.
But oh, Sylvie, what makes the sky such a darling blue?
Sylvie's sweet lips shaped themselves to reply, but her voice sounded faint and very far away.
I think I shall cry.
Sylvie, please lend me your handkerchief.
I hope you'll enjoy the dinner—such as it is; and that you won't mind the heat—such as it isn't.
THE BANQUET 723 The sentence sounded well, but somehow I couldn't quite understand it; and the Other Professor seemed to L^ be no better off.
So the Bellman would cry: and the crew would reply They are merely conventional signs!
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 761 Other maps are such shapes, with their islands and capes!
'Come, listen, my men, while I tell you again The five unmistakable marks By which you may know, wheresoever you go, The warranted genuine Snarks.
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 763 Let us take them in order.
the Bellman exclaimed, As he angrily tingled his bell.
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 765 He remarked to me then,said that mildest of men, 'If your Snark be a Snark, that is right: Fetch it home by all means—you may serve it with greens And it's handy for striking a light.
Bring me paper and ink, The best there is time to procure.
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 77I The Beaver brought paper, portfoUo, pens, And ink in unfaiUng suppUes : While strange creepy creatures came out of their dens, And watched them with wondering eyes.
He is prickly, certainly,said the Professor, who had caught the last words, but we must remember that, however porcupiny, he is royal still!
After this feast is over, I'm going to take a little present to Prince Uggug—just to soothe him, you know: it isn't pleasant living in a cage.
With the umbrella in its mouth, its jaws were so far apart that it could get no firm grip on the parasol.
After two or three failures, it paused and considered the matter.
It isn't as hot as it might be,the Professor replied, catching at the first idea that came to hand.
Ah, I see what you mean nowT the Other Professor graciously remarked.
The Professor smiled benignantly.
Ah, yes!
) Then came a rush of burning tears to the eyes, as though one could weep one's soul away for pure delight.
And lastly there fell on me a sense of awe that was almost terror — some such feeling as Moses must have had when he heard the words ''Put off thy shoes from off thy feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy grounds The figures of the children bec
So he shut the door again; and he went a little further; and then he thought he'd just peep in once more.
And behold, there was no Bread!
Bruno asked.
And both children looked uneasy at the dismal suggestion.
This minute, for a trifling fee, ril teach you how to jumpl You may be faint from many a jail.
And bruised by many a bump: But, if you persevere through all.
It has to, you know.
And can people see the leaf rock, who ca'n't see the Fairv on it?
864 VERSE They leave us shuddering and aghast, With anguish smarting?
And cannot friends be firm and fast, And yet bear parting?
I must admit That isn't badly put.
And certainly you've given me The best of wine and victual — Excuse my violence,said he, But accidents like this, you see, They put one out a little.
'' That Pig lay still as any stone.
And could not stir a stump: Nor ever, if the truth were Xnown, Was he again observed to moan, Nor ever wring his hoofs and groan.
By evitation Of amputation, By permutation In conversation.
And deep reflection You'll avoid dejection.
i EARLY VERSE 795 And sorely do they labour, ^ For the steed ^ is very strong, And backward moves its stubborn feet, And backward ever doth retreat.
And drags its guides along.
PUZZLES FROM WONDERLAND * I -^ Dreaming of apples on a wall.
And dreaming often, dear, I dreamed that, if I counted all, —How many would appear?
It does mean death,he said, in a husky whisper: but—darling—I am called.
And even my life itself—His voice failed him, and he said no more.
And must I then, at Friendship's call, Calmly resign the little all (Trifling, I grant, it is and small) I have of gladness.
And lend my being, to the thrall Of gloom and sadness?
My sympathies were warming fast Towards the little fellow: He was so utterly aghast At having found a Man at last.
And looked so scared and yellow.
One for Lady Sylvie, and one for the smaller animal!
And may I help in the Lecture?
No longer could it run or play.
And must we, chicken, must we part.
I have lost thee, I rue it.
And my fare for the passage!
798 VERSE That was of public right, As much as four strong rabbits Could munch from morn to night, For he'd done a deed of daring, And faced that savage steed, And therefore cups of coffee sweet.
And everything that was a treat, Were but his right and meed.
Not even a shriek!
And excitedly tingled his bell.
All firmly till that moment Had Ulfrid Longbow stood.
And faced the foe right valiantly, As everv warrior should.
One pound a week they offer you.
And find yourself in Bogies!
He drops upon the plain — So I, that had resolved to bring Conviction to a ghost.
And found it quite a different thing From any human arguing.
And vaulted from his seat.
And gained the road in triumph,^ And stood upon his feet.
I echoed.
And good night to you!
He trembled when he caught my eye.
And got behind a chair.
But he slipped the stirrups from his feet The bridle from his hand.
And grasped the mane full lightly.
!
And has that ne'er been seen Save with a row of foothghts placed between?
' 'Very good, my child!
And have you learnt B?
And Bruno ran after it.
And he called 'Little Lamb!
Nodding to friends across the Street, One struggle more and we shall meet.
And he had scaled that wondrous stair That soars from earth to upper air, Where rich and poor alike must climb.
I think Til go and lie down a bit.
And he hobbled out of the Saloon, watched by the pitying eyes of the two children.
He had to put salt with them, a-course,Bruno said gravely: 00 ca'n't keep promises when there isn't any salt.
And he kept his birthday on the second shelf.
However, he did see only two Foxes.
And he said 'Eldest little Fox, have you been eating the youngest little Fox?
And he shook out the second little Fox!
And he said 'Now open your mouth!
) And so Bruno went home: and took the hamper into the kitchen, and opened it.
And he saw—Sylvie looked at meJ this time, as if she thought I had been rather neglected and ought to be allowed one guess, at any rate.
' And he shook, and shook!
And he shook out the youngest little Fox, and all the Apples, and all the Bread!
I likes the little man; and I likes the way they spinned him—like a teetle-totle-tum.
And he turned a loving look on the gentle old man who was sitting at the other side of his leaf-bed, and who instantly began to sing, accompanying himself on his Outlandish guitar, while the snail, on which he sat, waved its horns in time to the music.
We must have a little chat together, before you go to bed.
And he was leading them away, but at the door they let go his hands, and ran back again to wish the Professor good night.
However, you're very short, now you're come: that's some comfort.
And he went on to enumerate the plans for the day.
She turned herself right round about.
And her heart brake into three.
And put Pomatum on his hair; He was, the loungers all agreed, A very heavy swell indeed: Men thought him, as he swaggered by, Some scion of nobility.
And never dreamed, so cold his look.
Learn well your grammar.
And never stammer, Write well and neatly, And sing most sweetly, Be enterprising, Love early rising, Go walk of six miles, Have ready quick smiles.
We call him the Inn-Spectre'' I bore it—bore it like a man — This agonizing witticism!
And nothing could be sweeter than My temper, till the Ghost began Some most provoking criticism.
Wor\ claims my wakeful nights, my busy daysAlbeit bright memories of that sunlit shore Yet haunt my dreaming gaze!
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK Fit the First The Landing ''Just the place for a Snark!
Sumfin about tigers—and bumble-bees —and robin-redbreasts, oo knows!
THE PIG-TALE 73I Why should you always have live things in stories?
Perhaps before this week shall fleet, Perhaps to-morrow, I trust to find your heart the seat Of wasting sorrow.
THE THREE VOICES The First Voice He trilled a carol fresh and free.
That those blind of one eye are blind for two; And consider contrariwise.
That to see with your eye you may have your eyes; So setting one against the other — For a mathematician no great bother — And working the sum, you will understand That sixteen wise rhen still trouble the land.
she broke off suddenly.
That's Sylvie singing!
Muddle—said Bruno.
That's a bit of it.
My feet got almost frozen to-day.
That's the shoemaker's fault!
Why shouldn't the weight get so used to being held up, that it ca'n't jail any more?
That's what / want to know!
Then this chair!
That's worst of all.
Leave him here to his fate—it is getting so late!
The Bellman exclaimed in a fright.
It is to me a great privilege,he said to Lady Muriel, to have met with this so marvellous a song.
The accompaniment to him is so strange, so mysterious: it is as if a new music were to be invented!
my landlady said, as she saw me out.
The boy said as some one had arrived unexpectedly— .
, till at last she made the welcome proposal Let's go and see him!
The children eagerly grasped the hands she offered them: and we went off to the Professor's study, and found him lying on the sofa, covered up with blankets, and reading a little manuscript-book.
It was that day when you brought us those mysterious flowers.
The children had run out into the garden; and I saw Eric coming in that way, and went to the window to meet him: and Sylvie was singing, under the trees, a song I had never heard before.
But take them in the middle, ^'And wave them slowly in and out, While drawing them asunder; And in a minute's time, no doubt, He'll raise his head and look about With eyes of wrath and wonder.
And here you must on no pretence Make the first observation.
*'Why, it's his birthday^ don't you know?
And his health will be drunk, and all that sort of thing.
*'Now reach me, sweet Atom, my gunlet.
And hurl the old shoelet for luc\: Let me hie to the ban\ of the runlet, And shoot thee a Duc\!
And posts them to her.
And if the verse flow free and fast.
And a fishy taste in the very eggs — By all means choose the Sea.
And if, with these dainties to drink and eat, - You prefer not a vestige of grass or tree.
The fact is, In caverns by the water-side, And other places that I've tried, I've had a lot of practice: But I have never taken yet A strict domestic part.
And in my flurry I forget The Five Good Rules of Etiquette We have to know by heart.
'' Nobody denied it.
And in the same way, if I were to bend this piece of whalebone round the post—thus—and put the ring over this hook—thus—it stays bent: but, if I unhook it, it straightens itself again.
And the Lamb was ever so frightened.
And it ran— It were really {lightened !
And it peepted in.
And it saw the Cat.
I were rolling it about.
And it's rolled itself away!
' And Bruno looked into its mouth.
And its mouth was full of Apples!
And how he faced the fiery steed.
And kept the New Croft Road, EARLY VERSE 799 THE TWO BROTHERS (1853) There were two brothers at Twyford school, And when they had left the place, It was, Will ve learn Greek and Latin?
EARLY VERSE 817 Waiting for Simon, she coughed in the chilly night, until the tanner found her.
And kindly brought a light old coat to wrap around her.
What's the magic that charms the glad babe in her arms, Till it cooes with the voice of the dove?
And now ensued quite the strangest of all the strange experiences that marked the wonderful year whose history I am writing—the experience of first hearing Sylvie's voice in song.
But chiefly for his kind intent To drink my health in beer.
And now if e'er by chance I put My fingers into glue.
796 VERSE / She stands in silence, pulling hard Against the pulling bit.
And now the road to Dalton Hath felt their coming tread, The crowd are speeding on before, And all have gone ahead.
And he stood, and he stood.
And one day he tumbleded ofiE, and he didn't hurt his self one bit.
669 he read from the page he had spread open before her.
And our Uttle hfe here,the Earl went on, is, to that grand time, like a child's summer-day!
I will stand on thy right hand And guard the pass for thee!
And out spake fair Flureeza,^ His sister eke was she, I will abide on thy other side.
And said, Come, tell me how you live!
And pinched him in the arm.
Not that other word at all.
And please will you come?
It means one boy,Sylvie whispered in return.
And plural means two or three.
By variations In occupations.
And prolongation Of relaxation, And combinations Of recreations, And disputation On the state of the nation In adaptation To your station, By invitations To friends and relations.
I'd certainly advise you just to write a simple letter, And to tell him that the cold he kindly asked about is better.
And say that by the tanyard you will wait in loving hope, At nine o'clock this evening if he's willing to elope With his faithful Arabella.
was the sound that first came to their ears.
And seemed almost too good to be true.
But all this came about so strangely.
And she had prayed, you know.
he seemed to say.
And then the red coal, which for the moment embodied the dear old Professor, began to wax dim, and with its dying lustre the words seemed to die away into silence.
And set of chains complete: What with the things you have to hire — The fitting on the robe — And testing all the coloured fire — The outfit of itself would tire The patience of a Job!
And then they're so fastidious.
she cried.
And there was a general rush for the door.
Let's go and look at the platform.
And there's that nice old Gardener singing still!
I turned to look in some surprise.
And there, before my very eyes, A little Ghost was standing!
he murmured, looking up at us.
And there, on a table near him, lay the book he was seeking when first I saw him.
'Care,' you know, killed the Cat.
And they caught 'Don't-care' by mistake, and hanged him instead.
And the little Foxes were ever so good!
And they learned their lessons backwards, and forwards, and upside-down.
) —they came as slow as slow!
And they said 'Oh!
There's one in each of these little tubes.
And this is a Megaloscope!
I will spare you,she said, calmly and quietly, to God.
And to God's poor,he whispered.
And that's the way(he gave a wink) I get my living here.
And very gladly will I drink Your Honour's health in beer.
^^Its master ^ cried with bursting heart.
And voice of agony and pain.
Let every hour be in its place Firm fixed, nor loosely shift.
And well enjoy the vacant space, As though a birthday gift.
800 VERSE The wind to his ear brought a voice, My brother, you didn't had ought ter!
And what have I done that you think it such fun To indulge in the pleasure of slaughter?
the musical young lady exclaimed, almost fondling them as she spoke.
And what tiny tiny feet they must have!
His accents mild took up the tale : He said, I go my ways.
And when I find a mountain-rill, I set it in a blaze.
said Sylvie, skilfully avoiding the argument.
Ask Mister Sir,Bruno lazily replied, clasping his hands behind his curly head, and lying back on his fernleaf, till it almost bent over with his weight.
For instance, a cat playing with a mouse.
Assuming it to have no moral responsibility, isn't that a greater mystery than a man over-driving a horse?
'Of so much fame in heaven expect thy meed' Poor comfort when one's *fame' concerns matters that will have ceased to have a meaning!
At any rate one wouldn't care to make any fresh medical discoveries,said Arthur.
Tomorrow I return there, taking nought from hence, save only — save only—he voice trembled, and with a look of ineffable tenderness, he laid his hands in silence on the heads of the two little ones who clung around him.
But he recovered himself in a moment, and beckoned to the Emperor to resume his place at the table.
And so 'Care' is alive still.
But he's very unhappy without his brother.
'' By this time I could see them clearly once more.
Bruno again sang by himself: — ^'Say, whence is the voice that, when anger is burning, Bids the whirl of the tempest to cease?
' ''Were it his Watch a-ticking?
Bruno asked me, with eyes that fairly sparkled with mischievous delight.
77/ tell oo a Fable!
Bruno began in a great hurry.
Oh, that's quite a accident!
Bruno began, so eagerly, that it was evident he had already propounded this very difficulty to the Cat.
He ca'n't guess!
Bruno cried eagerly.
May / do them?
Bruno eagerly asked.
'Pretend it hadn't any lessons!
Bruno earnestly pleaded.
What'll you give him for a birthday-present?
Bruno enquired.
And, while the Lion was telling him the story, it nibbled some of his head off— Don't say 'nibbled'!
Bruno entreated.
''Flightens me!
Bruno exclaimed indignantly.
Why, the rest of me^ a-course!
Bruno exclaimed triumphantly.
This little boy— Please don't make any jokes about me!
Bruno exclaimed, his eyes filling with tears.
And the Oven— —ever so Hght and so puffy!
Bruno impatiently corrected her.
Sylvie cried delightedly.
Bruno jumped up, and patted me on the head.
And the Fox had got a great big knife—all ready to kill the poor little Lamb—(Oo needn't be flightened, Mister Sir!
Bruno put in, in a hasty whisper.
Oo doosn't know how Cats speaks!
Bruno rejoined contemptuously.
And there he saw the three little Foxes sitting round the table, with their clean pinafores on^ and spoons in their hands— Spoons in their hands!
Bruno repeated in an ecstasy of delight.
Oo doosn't know nuffin about it!
Bruno replied.
Let's go on!
Bruno said hastily.
No, it hadn't a sensible effect!
Bruno said indignantly.
Then I's welly glad I is a singular boy!
Bruno said with great emphasis.
It's welly extremely nasty!
Bruno said, as his face resumed its natural shape.
in a tone of absolute conviction.
Bruno threw his arms round Sylvie's neck.
But I find there is hardly room enough to operate—the smaller animal is rather in my way— Who does he mean?
Bruno whispered to Sylvie.
I divide my subject,he began, into three parts— I think I'll get down!
Bruno whispered to Sylvie.
he enquired.
Bruno's look of horror quite startled him.
said Sylvie.
But I can live without learning!
Why, you yourself said, just now, 'the mind of the Bee'!
But I did not say 'minds^ my child,the Earl gently replied.
What I meant, was—the Professor began, looking much puzzled, —was—that you don't know everything, you know.
But I do know everything I know!
One would li\e to meet them again, in living form!
But I feel, somehow, that can never be.
' And Bruno said 'Please'm, I want it for my Picnic' And the Cow said 'Moo!
But I hope you wo'n't boil anv of it?
And thence they make a stuff they call Rowland's Macassar Oil; But fourpence-halfpenny is all They give me for my toil.
But I was thinking of a plan To paint one's gaiters green.
I sell them unto men,'' he said, Who sail on stormy seas; And that's the way I get my bread — A trifle, i£ you please.
But I was thinking of a way To multiply by ten.
And the Sea's so grand!
But a Mountain's grander!
he was beginning.
But both speeches stopped suddenly—and, in the dead silence that followed, a knocking was heard at the outer door.
So that is merely one of the many instances of Sin causing suffering to others than the Sinner himself.
But don't you find a greater difficulty in sufferings inflicted by animals upon each other ?
And these I do not sell for gold, Or coin of silver-mine.
But for a copper-halfpenny, And that will purchase nine.
Bell rings.
But hark!
God has reasoned it all out, and has put into the mind of the Bee the conclusions^ only, of the reasoning process.
But how do their minds come to work together?
If we were to begin giving it every day, the bottles would soon be empty!
But if they were ill on the other days?
Mamma might come for two or three— NEVERr yelled Tottles, And he meant it.
The conclusion of the song was followed by quite a chorus of thanks and compliments from all parts of the room, which the gratified singer responded to by bowing low in all directions.
I have said it thrice: What I tell vou three times is true.
The crew was complete: it included a Boots — A maker of Bonnets and Hoods — A Barrister, brought to arrange their disputesAnd a Broker, to value their goods.
Lady Muriel, dressed in the deepest mourning, her face hidden by a long crape 682 I A FAIRY-DUET 683 veil, was kneeling before a little marble cross, round which she was fastening a wreath of flowers.
The cross stood on a piece of level turf, unbroken by any mound, and I knew that it was simply a memorialcross, for one whose dust reposed elsewhere, even before reading the simple inscription : — In loving Memory of ARTHUR FORESTER, M.
But the very same plan to the Beaver occurred : It had chosen the very same place: Yet neither betrayed, by a sign or a word.
The disgust that appeared in his face.
I was watching with some curiosity.
The dog came racing back to where I stood, but found an unexpected difficulty in picking up the things it had come for.
If the creature were to escape, this size^ it would— But the mischief was done.
The door had swung open, THE PROFESSOR S LECTURE 7II and in another moment the Monster had got out, and was trampUng down the terrified, shrieking spectators.
People began running in and out.
The excitement increased every moment.
Three cheers for the Emperor!
The faintest possible sound followed this announcement: and the Chancellor, with admirable presence of mind, instantly proclaimed A speech from the Emperor!
The witless wanderer to snare.
The fatal Notes neglected fall.
Every precaution that science could suggest, against the risf^ of infection, was adopted: and the sufferers were tenderly carried on litters, one by one, up the steep hill, and placed in the ambulances which, each provided with a hospital nurse, were wait
The fifteen miles, to the Hospital, were done at a walking-pace, as some of the patients were in too prostrate a condition to bear jolting, and the journey occupied the whole afternoon.
And believes that they add to the beauty of scenesA sentiment open to doubt.
The fifth is ambition.
You'll break all the bottles!
The first part is to take hold of the knobs,putting them into Bruno's hands.
Well, now, suppose we left things just as they are, for a long time.
The force of the whalebone would get exhausted, you know, and it would stay bent, even when you unhooked it.
I have always maintained the principle,the Professor began, that it is a good rule to take some food — occasionally.
The great advantage of dinner-parties— he broke ojff suddenly.
But tell too surely something hath gone wrong!
The sight that I have come upon The stoutest heart ^ would sicken, That nasty hen has been and gone And killed another chicken!
He has loaded with bullet and powder: His footfall is noiseless as air: But the Voices grow louder and louder, And bellow, and bluster, and blare.
They bristle before him and after.
The Empress found the children rather sad company.
They could talk of nothing but the dear Professor,and what a pity he's so ill!
) And ever after that, they were such good Uttle Foxes!
They did their lessons as good as gold—and they never did what Bruno told them not to—and they never ate each other any more—and they never ate themselves!
He is waving his hands, he is wagging his head, He has certainly found a Snark!
They gazed in delight, while the Butcher exclaimed He was always a desperate wag!
And there's the Wesleyan Minister.
They go amongst their own flocks, mostly; but I'm told that those who are dying like to have any of the three with them.
but the others declare It was only a breeze that went by.
They hunted till darkness came on, but they found Not a button, or feather, or mark.
But the Professor hastily moved the tray out of his reach.
They might get fixed to the wrong Specimens, you know!
Called her a fool, thus her pretensions flooring.
VII Five seeing, and seven blind Give us twelve, in all, we find ; But all of these, 'tis very plain.
The maid announced the meal in tones , That I myself had taught her, Meant to allay my sister's moans Like oil on troubled water: I rushed to Jones, the lively Jones, And begged him to escort her.
Vainly he strove, with ready wit.
I always use hot ink, myself, in the winter.
Very few people ever think of that!
Very dusty was his jacket.
Very fidgety his manner.
''Arent it a nice story, Mister Sir?
Very,I said.
(puts her arm round his neck) Is there a secret, Wiffie?
W.
When all are guilty, none should play the Judge.
We're actors all, a motley company, Some on the Stage, and others—on the sly — And guiltiest he who paints so well his phiz His brother actors scarce know what he is.
I don't lose her bonny face for many days together.
Well I mind the very first time she come, after we'd met at Railway Station.
A truce to moralizing; we invite The goodly company we see to-night \ ) To have the little banquet we have got.
Well dressed, we hope, and served up hot & hot.
I said.
Well, I don't know,Bruno said thoughtfully; 'cause he hadn't no lessons to do.
The Professor looked at his watch.
Well, I thinks a thousand years will do to begin with,he said.
Good-night, old Turnip-top, good-night!
When I am gone, perhaps They'll send you some inferior Sprite, Who'll keep you in a constant fright And spoil your soundest naps.
If the fish be a trout, I'm afraid there's no doubt I must strike him like lightning that's greased; EARLY VERSE 8oi If the fish be a pike, I'll engage not to strike, Till I've waited ten minutes at least.
But in those ten minutes to desolate Fate Your brother a victim may fall!
On the contrary,said the Earl, I hold that the work of a bee-hive involves Reason of the highest order.
But none of it is done by the Bee.
At least,I said, I'm glad to find A Ghost is not a dumb thing!
But pray sit down : you'll feel inclined (If, like myself, you have not dined) To take a snack of something: ^'Though, certainly, you don't appear A thing to oflfer food to!
There was a strangeness in the room, And Something white and wavy Was standing near me in the gloom — / took it for the carpet-broom Left by that careless slavey.
But presently the Thing began To shiver and to sneeze: On which I said Come, come, my man I That's a most inconsiderate plan.
EARLY VERSE 783 FACTS Were I to take an iron gun, And fire it off towards the sun; I grant 'twould reach its maHfJ^t last, But not till many years had passed.
But should that bullet change its force, And to the planets take its course, 'Twould never reach the nearest star.
Or can I have been drinking?
But soon a gentler feeling crept Upon me, and I sat and wept ^^^ An hour or so, like winking.
The truth of Religion seemed ready to stand or fall with the assertion that Man was the only reasoning animal.
But that is at an end now.
he eagerly asked.
But the King did not hear the question, as the Professor was speaking to him.
he inquired.
But the Professor was once more absorbed in his Lecture, which he was reading from his note-book.
The rest of my speech(he exclaimed to his men) You shall hear when Fve leisure to speak it.
But the Snark is at hand, let me tell you again!
I'll reduce it to five, so perhaps you'll survive.
But the chance is exceedingly small.
Don't you know the owls have only just got up?
But the frogs have gone to bed, ages ago.
How long this curious speech might have lasted it is THE PIG-TALE 733 impossible to say, for just at this moment a hurricane shook the palace to its foundations, bursting open the windows, extinguishing some of the lamps, and filling the air with clouds
But the storm subsided as suddenly as it had risen — the casements swung into their places again: the dust vanished: all was as it had been a minute ago—with the exception of the Emperor and Empress, over whom had come a wondrous change.
It should be labeled at once!
But the strong men only pushed him back.
A good nibble or bite is my chiefest delight, When Fm merely expected to see^ But a bite from a fish is not quite what I wish.
When I get it performed upon me; And just now here's a swarm of dace at my arm.
764 VERSE Fit the Third The Baker's Tale They roused him with muffins—they roused him with ice — They roused him with mustard and cress — They roused him with jam and judicious advice — They set him conundrums to guess.
When at length he sat up and was able to speak, His sad story he oflfered to tell; And the Bellman cried Silence!
And often in the evenings, When the fire is blazing bright.
When books bestrew the table And moths obscure the light.
And these were the words of her anger and grief.
When first to Simon Smith I gave my hand I never could have thought he would have acted half so mean as this, And where's the new police?
) When he came the house unto, His breath both quick and short he drew.
When he came before the door.
He shrieked and tore his raven hair.
When he came my chamber in, (And O, but a hog is fat!
Once and again I heard him fall.
When he came up to the turret stair.
The man fell fainting to the ground.
When he crossed the lofty hall.
His face grew paler than before.
When he turned the handle round.
It says You must not laugh;When once I wished to drink some gin It said You must not quaff.
When once a meal I wished to taste It said You must not bite;When to the wars I went in haste It said You must not fight.
Simon Smith was tall and slim, and she doted upon him, But he always called her Miss Jones—he never got so far, As to use her Christian name—it was too familiar.
When she called him Simon dearhe pretended not to hear.
And that's the way he speaks of Shelley's Sky-Lark, is it?
When the Poet particularly says 'Hail to thee, blithe spirit!
He came as a Butcher: but gravely declared.
When the ship had been sailing a week, He could only kill Beavers.
laughed Lady Muriel, rising and shutting up the piano as she spoke.
When you've been nid—nid—nodding all the time I've been singing for your benefit!
That stirs the vexed soul with an aching—a yearning For the brotherly hand-grip of peace?
Whence the music that fills all our being—that thrills Around us, beneath, and above?
The Monster gathered its legs together, and in one tremendous bound vanished into the sky.
Where is it?
The wandering phantom broke and fled, Straightway I saw within my head A vision of a ghostly bed.
Where lay two worn decrepit men, The fictions of a lawyer's pen.
Each thought he was thinking of nothing but SnarkAnd the glorious work of the day; And each tried to pretend that he did not remark That the other was going that way.
But the valley grew narrow and narrower still, And the evening got darker and colder.
The Jury all cheered, though the Judge said he feared That the phrase was not legally sound.
But their wild exultation was suddenly checked When the jailer informed them, with tears.
They are not dated^ I find,he said with a slightly dejected air: so I fear I ca'n't tell you.
But they both happened: there's no doubt of tJiat.
' It said— If it was so very sorry,Sylvie said, rather disdainfully, it wouldn't eat the Mouses after they'd killed themselves!
But this difficulty, also, had evidently not been lost sight of in the exhaustive ethical discussion just concluded.
And cower in the straw; The chickens ^ are submissive, And own thy will for law; Bullfinches and canary Thy bidding do obey; And e'en the tortoise in its shell Doth never say thee nay.
But thy steed will hear no master, Thy steed will bear no stick, And woe to those that beat her, And woe to those that kick!
Lady Muriel re plied, glancing at the three recumbent figures around her.
But what you call activity of mind— —is the privilege of young Physicians only^' said the Earl.
Since then I've often wished that I Had been a Spectre born.
But what's the use?
It wouldn't look grand—the bits of it in the wheelbarrow,Sylvie candidly admitted.
But when 00 put it together again—Bruno began.
^Gave Under-Coo^ Number Thirteen a Double Dose of Medicine' That's something to be proud of, isnt it?
But which happened first?
Contrast us not with giants in the Art, Nor say You should see Sothern in that part; Nor yet, unkindest cut of all, in fact.
Condemn the actors, while you praise the Act.
Sir, or On whom he pinned his faith!
Constructed by whatever law, So poor a job I never saw.
The Phantom shook his head and smiled.
Consult them?
The reason.
Cook, is plain to view.
You'll lend the pan to me.
Cook?
What could you inscribe better than that?
Could any human name mark it more clearly as my own individual property?
Why, you hjiow they had!
Couldn't be certain^' said Bruno.
They might be asleep, you know.
Couldn't, if / was awake,Bruno said cunningly.
You ca'n't wrench people out of boots,'' the Professor mildly observed.
C«a- 742 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Bruno laughed saucily.
Oh, charming man!
Dear Simon Smith, sweet Simon Smith.
She told me as she come to mak' amends.
Dear child!
let me call you so.
Dear friends, look kindly on our little show.
Bruno hastily moved his chair in the direction indicated.
Did I move angrily enough?
''Here, your Imperial Highness?
Did I rightly understand— Bring him here!
And dropped a^eep upon the sand.
EARLY VERSE 807 SHE'S ALL MY FANCY PAINTED HIM [This affecting fragment was found in MS.
And tweaked his grey and reverend locks, And put himi into pain.
EARLY VERSE 815 He said, I hunt for haddocks' eyes Among the heather bright, And work them into waistcoat-buttons In the silent night.
And slowly sob oft lower forms.
EARLY VERSE 8ll And one, a green thyme-honoured Bank, Where flowers are growing wild and rank.
For years I've not been visited By any kind of Sprite; Yet still they echo in my head, Those parting words, so kindly said, Old Turnip-top, good-night!
ECHOES Lady Clara Vere de Vere Was eight years old, she said: Every ringlet, lightly shaken, ran itself in golden thread.
Drink tea, not cofFee; EARLY VERSE 785 Never eat toffy.
Eat bread with butter.
PROLOGUE (Misses Beatrice and Ethel Hatch, daughters of Dr.
Edwin Hatch, Vice-principal of St.
— was drawing to a close, and the brief wintry day hardly gave light enough to recognise the old familiar objects, bound up with so many happy memories, as the train glided round the last bend into the station, and the hoarse cry of Elveston!
Elveston!
Rude spirits of the seething outer strife, Unmeet to read her pure and simple spright, Deem, if you list, such hours a waste of life.
Empty of all delightl Chat on, sweet Maid, and rescue from annoy Hearts that by wiser tal\ are unbeguiled.
8o8 VERSE He trusts to you to set them free.
Exactly as we were.
And, thinking he had now said all he had come to say, I held out my hand to bid him good night.
He grasped it warmly, and added, turning his face away as he spoke, By the way, there is one other thing I wanted to say.
The moment one looked in his face!
He had bought a large map representing the sea.
In the midst of his laughter and glee.
He had softly and suddenly vanished away — For the Snark was a Boojum, you see.
Her Hps curved downwards instantly, As if of india-rubber.
Hounds in full cry I like,said she: (Oh, how I longed to snub her!
Why, of course it does!
How clever of you!
You fill it with lumps of coal in the winter, you know, and you sit around it and enjoy the warmth.
How jolly it would be to fill it now with lumps of ice, and sit round it and enjoy the coolth!
said the Emperor, who was getting a little restless.
How many Axioms are you going to give us?
It's a bad outlook for those poor fishermen—and a worse one for all the women and children.
How many are there of them altogether?
But what oddness!
How much of singularity!
the Professor cheerfully replied.
How often I've explained to him that he ought THE BANQUET 721 to makes boots with little iron frames under the soles, to hold lamps!
It is this, it is this that I dread!
I engage with the Snark—every night after dark — In a dreamy delirious fight: I serve it with greens in those shadowy scenes.
To make amends for what?
I enquired.
One couldn't doubt that it had gone through a real train of logical thought.
I entirely agree with you,said Lady Muriel: but don't orthodox writers condemn that view, as putting Man on the level of the lower animals ?
You'll sometimes find that one or two Are all you really need To let the wind come whistling throughBut here there'll be a lot to do!
I faintly gasped Indeed!
Good night, my own own darling!
I followed his example, and we two left the house together.
Once upon a time there was a Boojum—the Professor began, but stopped suddenly.
I forget the rest of the Fable,he said.
he said.
I forgive you!
How much are they a dozen?
I growled No matter what they are!
Beat a dog till it howls outright — Cruel, but all very well for a spree: Suppose that he did so day and night, That would be like the Sea.
I had a vision of nursery-maids; Tens of thousands passed by me — All leading children with wooden spades, And this was by the Sea.
Why, the entertainment has begun T the Professor exclaimed, as he hurried the children into the ReceptionSaloon.
I had no idea it was so late!
Her eyes were gleaming—but it was the excitement of joy, rather than of grief.
I have a surprise for you!
Again, the first oin borogovesis pronounced like the oin borrow.
I have heard people try to give it the sound of the oin worry.
f^I have heard Bruno sing, more than once,I said: but I never heard Sylvie.
I have only heard her once^' said Lady Muriel.
' It has been a very wearying thought to me.
I have sometimes fancied one mighty in that event, say 'It is better not to be,' and pray for personal annihilation—the Nirvana of the Buddhists.
Take Pure Mathematics, for instance—a Science independent of our present surroundings.
I have studied it, myself, a little.
I sprang to my feet in terror, and—and found myself standing before my solitary hearth, where the poker, dropping at last from the hand of the sleeper, had knocked over the tongs and the shovel, and had upset the kettle, filling the air with clouds of ste
With a weary sigh, I betook myself to bed.
So she wrote it, & signed it, & sealed it, & sent it, & dressed herself out in her holiday things.
With bracelets & brooches, & earrings, & necklace, a watch, & an eyeglass, & diamond rings.
And, when I transport myself, in thought, through some thousands or millions of years, and fancy myself possessed of as much Science as one created reason can carry, I ask myself 'What then?
With nothing more to learn, can one rest content on \nowledge^ for the eternity yet to be lived through?
Why, then you're not the party!
With that he struck the board a blow That shivered half the glasses.
The loss of his clothes hardly mattered, because He had seven coats on when he came.
With three pair of boots—but the worst of it was, He had wholly forgotten his name.
The work is done, the hen has taken Possession of her nest and eggs.
Without a thought of eggs and bacon,^ (Or I am very much mistaken:) She turns over each shell.
PHANTASMAGORIA 845 Why, no,said he; perhaps I should Have stayed another minute — But still no Ghost, that's any good.
Without an introduction would Have ventured to begin it.
859 ?
\A860 VERSE Then they joined and all abused it, Unrestrainedly abused it, As the worst and ugliest picture They could possibly have dreamed of.
h A VALENTINE [Sent to a friend who had complained that I was glad enough to see him when he came, but didn't seem to miss him if he stayed away.
] And cannot pleasures, while they last, Be actual unless, when past.
Having, then, distinctly stated that I challenge no attention in the following little poem to its merely verbal jingle, I must beg the candid reader to confine his criticism to its treatment of the subject.
] From his shoulder Hiawatha Took the camera of rosewood.
^A full account of the history and misfortunes of these interesting creatures may be found in the first Lay of Sorrow.
^ It is a singular fact that a donkey makes a point of returning any kicks offered to it.
They gave him bread and butter,^ * The reader will probably be at a loss to discover the nature of this triumph, as no object was gained, and the donkey was obviously the victor; on this point, however, we are sorry to say we can offer no good explanation
^ Much more acceptable to a true knight than corn-landwhich the Roman people were so foolish as to give to their daring champion, Horatius.
14, 1873.
^ PHANTASMAGORIA Canto I The Trystyng One winter night, at half-past nine.
^ Press out.
^ Probably one of the two stalwart youths.
And, entering, finds to his despair He's missed the very latest train.
^ ^ Beak and claw.
^ ^ drawn.
^ bystanders.
* bushes.
^ cunning.
Presumptuous thought!
to you and your applause In humbler confidence we trust our cause.
And she told her sister Susan he behaved extremely queer, Who said, Very right!
very right!
I've no idea where they are!
was all I could say, on finding myself appealed to, by general consent, for an explanation.
Don't trouble yourself!
was the general cry.
What is it?
was the general cry.
but the answer was less audible, the only words I could distinctly catch being ten since morning, and two more just— But there is a doctor there?
we heard Arthur say: and a deep voice, that we had not heard before, replied Dead, Sir.
It's quite old-fashioned now to groan When you begin to speak : This is the newest thing in tone— And here (it chilled me to the bone) He gave an awful squeak.
« Perhaps,he added, to your ear That sounds an easy thing:?
Let me explain my visit.
«Houses are classed, I beg to state.
* beyond.
® much wearied.
I represented, respectfully, that I was trying to look as if it wasn't.
—he was a middling good Boy— He were a welly good Boy!
That do make a good Boy!
Bruno insisted.
And so— May / help oo?
Bruno interrupted.
the cheery voice repeated.
I told them you were coming.
The proof is complete.
If only I've stated it thrice.
Good night, dear friend!
Let us see you soon—and often!
The fairy quietly replied, And said You must not ask.
Moral: You mustn't.
Its face of grimmliest green, On human beings used to feed.
Most dreadful to be seen.
The Fourth prohibits trespassing Where other Ghosts are quartered: And those convicted of the thing (Unless when pardoned by the King) Must instantly be slaughtered.
834 VERSE That simply means 'be cut up small': Ghosts soon unite anew: The process scarcely hurts at ailNot more than when you re what you call *Cut up' by a Review.
So much the colour of the grass That they could ne'er be seen.
I gave his ear a sudden box, And questioned him again.
^ The henhouse.
79^ VERSE * As the sage mother with a powerful spell ^ Forced each in turn its contents to express,^ But ah!
So it need not be reckoned at all.
802 VERSE Do you see that old trout with a turn-up-nose snout?
Nov, 1871.
826 VERSE PROLOGUE Enter Beatrice, leading Wilfred, She leaves him at centre (front) y and after going round on tip-toe, to make sure they are not overheard, returns and takes his arm.
Wait for the Victim to commence: No Ghost of any common sense Begins a conversation.
832 VERSE If he should say 'How came you here?
' He lingered over the beautiful words, as if he loved them: and his voice, like distant music, died away into silence.
After a minute or two he began again.
The Beaver went simply galumphing about, At seeing the Butcher so shy : And even the Baker, though stupid and stout, Made an effort to wink with one eye.
Be a man!
Medicine has to be nasty, you know.
Be good enough to take this jug, down into the Servants' Hall,he said to the footman who answered the bell: and tell them it's their Medicine for today T Which of them is to drink it.
You can say it well enough, if you only try.
Come!
Or have we reached at last that golden age That finds deception only on the Stage ?
Come, let's confess all round before we budge.
Loan of a Loveris the leading dish.
Concluding with a dainty course of fish; r Whitebait at Greenwichin the best condition (By Mr.
And practise first on something small.
Concluding with a ten-foot wall.
he began.
It's the old Beggar again!
He had been to the Vicarage, and had arranged for the wedding to take place at eight the next morning (there was no legal obstacle, as he had, some time before this, obtained a Special License) in the little church we knew so well.
My old friend here,indicating me, will act as *Best Man,' I know: your father will be there to give you away : and—and—you will dispense with bride'smaids, my darling?
Best of Familiars!
Nay then, farewell, my duckling roast, Faretvell, farewell, my tea and toast, My meerschaum and cigars!
Bird thou never wertl' She led the way to the smoking-room, where, ignoring all the usages of Society and all the instincts of Chivalry, the three Lords of the Creation reposed at their ease in low rocking-chairs, and permitted the one lady who was pres
Nay, it was only one of the three who had the chivalry to go beyond the common-place thank you,and to quote 674 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED the Poet's exquisite description of how Geraint, when waited on by Enid, was moved To stoop and \iss the tender
And he left that happy party.
Neither did he leave them slowly.
Nobody knew: one thing only was certain, that no one had been near the piano since the Count had sung the last verse of the song.
Nevare mind him!
Down with the portcullis!
No sooner said than done: and all breathed freely once more, on seeing the Porcupine safely caged.
And we all trooped off, in hot haste, to the BanquetingHall, where the feast had already begun.
No time was lost in helping the dishes, and very speedily every guest found his plate filled with good things.
Why, they could not even see us!
No use at all,Lady Muriel echoed with a sigh.
The Elfin-King sadly shook his head.
No use, no use!
VI In these degenerate days,we oft hear said, Manners are lost and chivalry is dead!
No wonder, since in high exalted spheres ' The same degeneracy, in fact, appears.
Last week?
No!
Such solemnity, too!
One could see he was wise.
Yes,he said resignedly: that is my sentiment, exactly.
Rest of body, and activity of mind,I put in.
Little Birds are feeding Justices with jam.
Rich in frizzled ham: Rich, I say, in oysters Haunting shady cloisters— That is what I am.
The Outcast smiled.
Rise up!
Though Ulfrid and his sister Have kindly stopped the way, And all the crowd have cried aloud, We can't wait here all day!
Round turned he as not deigning Their words to understand.
Was no great compliment!
S30 VERSE I'm not so young, Sir,he replied, As you might think.
And he fastened the ribbon round her neck again.
SYLVIE WILL LOVE ALL—ALL WILL LOVE SYLVIE.
And the Bellman, sagaciously nodding his head.
Said That must depend on the weather.
But the principal failing occurred in the sailing, And the Bellman, perplexed and distressed.
Said he had hoped, at least, when the wind blew due East, That the ship would not travel due West!
For the lad that he flung was so tender and young, It quite gave them an appetite.
Said he, Thus shall he wallop about And the fish take him quite at their ease.
) VI Said the Moon to the Sun, Is the daylight begun?
Said the Sun to the Moon, Not a minute too soon.
761) Then the bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes: 9r In view of this painful possibility, I will not (as I might) appeal indignantly to my other writings as a proof that I am incapable of such a deed: I will not (as I might) point to the strong
The Bellman, who was almost morbidly sensitive about appearances, used to have the bowsprit unshipped once or twice a week to be revarnished; and it more than once happened, when the time came for replacing it, that no one on board could remember which en
Notes on Vol.
Three!
But when safe on terra firma His brother he did spy, What did you do that for?
he cried, Then unconcerned he stepped aside And let it canter by.
Nay, brother!
he cried, for whatever betide.
Permit me!
and in a moment he had whisked Bruno upon the table.
A general search was set on foot with much enthusiasm: curtains were thrown back and shaken, cupboards opened,.
and ottomans turned over; but the number of possible hiding-places proved to be strictly limited; and the search came to an end almost as soon as it had begun.
One was that one you asked me in the morning, 'How m.
any pennies is there in two shillings?
What may I do?
at length I cried, Tired of the painful task.
None, I think, but an idiot could — Or one that loved the Sea.
b It is pleasant and dreamy, no doubt, to float With thoughts as boundless, and souls as free: But, suppose you are very unwell in the boat, How do you like the Sea?
I have to keep all the Royal Servants in good health—and that reminds me!
he cried, ringing the bell in a great hurry.
The Specimen is ready!
he cried, with his eye at one of the tubes, while he carefully emptied the pill-box through a little hole at the side.
Keep the door of the Microscope shut!
he cried.
Yet, oh!
beware, sir horseman!
Look here!
he cried.
Why, actually here's the Other Professor!
he cried.
''Not Tibbs!
he cried—his tone became A shade or two less hearty — Why, no,said I.
Hadn't it?
he enquired.
May I do it now?
he enquired.
A common mahogany table!
he growled, pointing to it contemptuously with his thumb.
Nothing but flags!
he kept repeating, as he set it before her.
Why, that's true!
he murmured to himself.
Yes, back again, old boy!
he murmured, smiling as I grasped his hand.
Why, of course he will!
chuckled the Professor.
I ca'n't read the rest of the sentence,he said at last, but it means that the labels have come loose, and the Things have got mixed— Let me stick 'em on again!
cried Bruno eagerly, and 708 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED began licking them, like postage-stamps, and dabbing them down upon the Crystals and the other Things.
/ know!
cried Bruno.
Oh, please invent a story like that!
cried Bruno.
To paint a dog green!
cried Bruno.
Why, that are one of the Professor s songs!
cried Bruno.
662 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED V Of course he is!
cried Lady Muriel.
'Oh, Bruno!
cried Sylvie.
Oh, Bruno!
cried Sylvie.
Why, of course!
cried Sylvie.
And then comes the Banquet— The Banquet!
cried the Other Professor, springing up, and filhng the room with a cloud of dust.
''What does he say?
cried the bewildered Professor.
' Chapter XVII To the Rescue!
It isnt bed-time!
Nor in this was he mistaken.
As the picture failed completely.
It is not mine to give.
It is yours, now, my—wife that is to be!
Well, he might have shaked hands with the Lion!
Oh, I'd forgotten that part!
^the footman asked, as he carried off the jug.
Oh, I've not settled that yet!
And he said *No!
it cant be my Watch a-ticking; because I haven't ^o^ a Watch!
That the sty was deserted when found : And the Judge kept explaining the state of the law In a soft under-current of sound.
k 774 VERSE The indictment had never been clearly expressed, And it seemed that the Snark had begun, And had spoken three hours, before any one guessed What the pig was supposed to have done.
Nonsense!
laughed Sylvie.
Then the Butcher contrived an ingenious plan For making a separate sally; A.
nd had fixed on a spot unfrequented by man, A dismal and desolate valley.
Such as Fry me!
or Fritter my wig!
To What-you-may-call-um!
or What-was-his-name^But especially Thing-um-a-jig!
A murmur of Hear, hear!
rose from the crowded Saloon.
Who shall I be?
said Bruno, pausing in the act of putting it to his lips.
What are the way to do it?
said Bruno, who was Hstening very attentively.
But it needn't be the same one, need it?
said Bruno.
What may I oflfer you?
said I.
Hush!
said Sylvie.
Oh, that would never do!
said Sylvie.
Well, well!
said he.
Come, my children!
said the Elfin-King, who had just entered the room.
What / ca'n't get over,said the Empress, in eager sympathy with her angry husband, is the tableT Pooh!
said the Emperor.
Nasty?
said the Professor.
Oo can begin wiz its moufy and ril— No, no!
said the Professor.
When did you invent that Fable?
said the Professor.
652 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED But Bruno weren't flightened!
said the owner of that name.
And where shall we dare to draw the line, and say 'He has made all these and no more : Yes, yes!
she assented, watching me with sparkling eyes.
You believe in them?
she cried delightedly, with a sudden motion as if about to clap her hands.
''Your life?
she repeated.
You do take five o'clock tea, I know!
she said to me, with the sweet playfulness of manner I remembered so well, even though you cant work your wicked will on the Law of Gravity, and make the teacups descend into Infinite Space, a little faster than the tea!
How curious!
she said, and put it into her mouth.
It is quite like old times, seeing you here again!
she said, in tones of genuine pleasure.
What shall it be?
she said.
Tennyson didn't know what he was talking about!
she saucily rejoined, with a touch of her old childish gaiety; and we parted.
Our prayers will go up together— Yes, yes!
sobbed Lady Muriel.
He'll be better soon!
the Elfin-King said cheerily.
There are two or three scientific difficulties— What was your general impression as to His Imperial Fatness?
the Emperor asked the Gold Stick.
Let the Gold Stick come forwards!
the Emperor gravely said.
Never mind about its food, just now!
the Emperor interrupted.
So you're come at last!
the Emperor sulkily remarked, as the Professor and the children took their places.
You must have blacked your face!
the Empress said anxiously.
Ca'n't find my hat!
the Httle fellow sadly replied.
What a singular boy!
the Lord Chancellor whispered to himself: but Bruno had caught the words.
Oh, but they might indeed!
the Other Professor protested.
This is a most interesting Experiment!
the Professor announced.
No, no!
the Professor corrected her.
He has described the appearance of the thing exactly!
the Professor exclaimed with enthusiasm.
Madam!
the Professor meekly replied.
It is much to be regretted!
the Professor mildly replied, as soon as he had a chance of speaking.
A large cage!
the Professor promptly replied.
You seem to enjoy that cake?
the Professor remarked.
Ah, well!
the Professor said with a sigh.
He does want brushing!
the Professor said, with a critical air, Here's your hat, little man!
That be the roight way, sure-ly!
the delighted Gardener exclaimed.
We shall need all our strength for the job!
the hunting of the snark 769 Fit the Fifth The Beaver's Lesson They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care; They pursued it with forks and hope; They threatened its hfe with a railway-share; They charmed it with smiles and soap.
And it said TU come in another day.
' And I said *Oo needn't be flightened.
You're only inventing!
!
And have you learnt C?
' 'Oh yes.
' And the eldest little Fox said *No no no!
' 'Second little Fox, have you been eating the youngest little Fox ?
they cry.
' 'Tis thrilling!
I went to the B-hive, and the B gave me some honey!
' 'Very good, my child!
Not like that wicked old thing there, that's got no head!
' (That hasn't got no head,Bruno repeated.
His Imperial Fatness was graciously pleased to say 'I don't care!
' 736 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED *Don't-care' came to a bad end,Sylvie whispered to Bruno.
'An' didna Minnie set out your tea in t' porch?
' An' I says 'My dear,' I says, 'I'm thinking you're Minnie hersen!
' And the Lion said 'Oh, I should like it very much indeed!
' And Bruno and the Lion went away together.
' And the Lamb said 'Oh, I should like it very much indeed^ if my Ma will let me!
' And Bruno said 'Let's go and ask you Ma!
But I hope you wo'n't ba^e any of them?
' And Bruno said 'No, indeed I wo'n't!
Yes, 'and apples.
' And Bruno said 'Won't you come with me to my Picnic?
What are you going to do with all those Apples?
' And Bruno said Tlease, Sir, I want them for my Picnic' And the Apple-Tree said 'Eh!
But I hope you wo'n't toast any of it?
' And Bruno said, 'No, indeed I wo'n't!
Wo'n't it do, if / live, and if Sylvie learns?
1 cant learn without living!
The words were something like 'I think it is Love, I feel it is Love.
' Her voice sounded far away, like a dream, but it was beautiful beyond all words—as sweet as an infant's first smile, or the first gleam of the white cliffs when one is coming home after weary years—a voice that seemed to fill one's whole being with peac
the Warden began, in a clear voice that was heard all through that vast hall.
' I come not to disturb you.
Take the subject of circles and ellipses—what we call 'curves of the second degree.
' In a future Life, it would only be a question of so many years (or hundreds of years, if you like), for a man to work out all their properties.
For then You will softly and suddenly vanish away^ And never be met with again!
' It is this, it is this that oppresses my soul.
We'll wait for you!
' It never comed back!
New Bread's so light and so puffy, it wants no toasting!
' It never doesn't want no toasting,said Bruno.
It 724 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED said—(the orator constantly omitted, as superfluous, his own share in the dialogue, and merely gave us the replies o£ the Cat) It said *Dead Mouses never objecks to be eaten.
' It said 'There's no use wasting good Mouses.
' It said *Sometimes little accidents happens : sometimes the Mouses kills theirselves.
' It said Ts always welly sorry, when the Mouses kills theirselves.
If you address a Ghost as *Thing!
' Or strike him with a hatchet, He is permitted by the King To drop all formal parleying — And then you're sure to catch it!
Did you say 'come in!
' Sir?
'They never doesn't nohow want no baking.
' So Bruno put the Apples in the hamper, along with the Bread, and the bottle of Milk.
Then Bruno said 'Now I want some Apples!
' So he took the hamper, and he went to the Apple-Tree, and he picked some lovely ripe Apples.
And then Bruno said 'Now I want some Bread!
' So he went to the Oven, Bruno's picnic 647 and he took out a delicious new Loaf.
We never dream o£ doing such a thing!
' So the Lamb said 'Then I'll come with you.
The old Fox is dead!
' THE LITTLE FOXES 655 Bruno got up in some excitement.
Bird thou never wert, That from Heaven, or near it, Pourest thy full heart!
' TO THE rescue!
That's why they say 'Begone, dull Care!
' Thank you!
Perhaps you're not aware That, if you don't behave, you'll soon Be chuckling to another tune — And so you'd best take care!
' That's the right way to cure a Sprite Of such-like goings-on — But gracious me!
''In the matter of Treason the pig would appear To have aided, but scarcely abetted: While the charge of Insolvency fails, it is clear, If you grant the plea 'never indebted.
' The fact of Desertion I will not dispute : But its guilt, as I trust, is removed (So far as relates to the costs of this suit) By the Alibi which has been proved.
I'm going to put you into the hamper, along with the Apples and the Bread: and you're not to eat the Apples: and you're not to eat the Bread: and you're not to eat anything—till we get to my house : and then you'll have your supper.
' The little Foxes' speech to Bruno.
' (It is impossible to give the tone in which Sylvie repeated this rapid little *No no no!
' The nearest I can come to it is to say that it was much as if a young and excited duck had tried to quack the words.
' And the second little Fox said 'No no no!
' Then he said 'Youngest little Fox, have you been eating the Apples?
Ripe Apples are so nice and so sweet, they want no baking!
' They never doesn't—Bruno was beginning, but Sylvie corrected herself before he could get the words out.
'Why, it's only the Carpenter a-mending my Wheelbarrow!
' Were it the Carpenter a-mending his Wheelbarrow?
I thin\ he said 'All of me that isn't Bone-disease is Rheumatism.
' Whatever are that knocking, Sylvie .
For instance, take the Axiom, 'Nothing is greater than itself ; that is, 'Nothing can contain itself' How often you hear people say *He was so excited, he was quite unable to contain himself.
' Why, of course he was unable!
How weary Life will be!
' Yet, if we look forward through those thirty years, we find him a great statesman, full of interests and joys far more intense than his baby-life could give—joys wholly inconceivable to his baby-mind—joys such as no baby-language could in the faintest d
' And the second little Fox did its very best to say 'No no no!
' but it could only say 'Weuchk!
' And the youngest little Fox tried to say 'No no no!
' but its mouth was so full, it couldn't, and it only said 'Wauch!
'Oh, come quick!
' he said.
^ fetched.
' pull.
'Whatever is that?
' said Bruno.
An' when she gets up to go, I says 'Winnot ye shak' hands wi' me?
' says I.
*An' didna Minnie light your pipe?
' says she.
*Didna Minnie mak' your tea fur you?
' says she.
An' she says 'Na,' she says: 'a cannot sha}( hands wi' thee!
' she says.
She says 'Your Minnie never shoo\ hands wi' you!
' she says.
So she says, 'Just tak' me fur your Minnie!
' she says.
*^ is.
' went.
*You may seek it with thimbles—and seek it with care You may hunt it with forks and hope; You may threaten its life with a railway-share; You may charm it with smiles and soap—' (That's exactly the method,the Bellman bold In a hasty parenthesis cri
) 'But oh, beamish nephew, beware of the day, If your Snark be a Boojum!
(It was the first sensible question she had asked in all her life.
) / put him there!
Its truth is such, the force of reason Can not avail to shake its power, Yet e'en the sun in summer season Doth not dispel so mild a shower As this, and he who sees it, sees on Beyond it to a sunny bower — No more, when ignorance is treason, Let wisdom's
) A man came hurrying up the path, (And what care I for that?
Don't cry more than 00 ca'n't help!
) And the next morning early, Bruno rang the big bell again.
He was beginning to pant a little, as he knew the crisis was coming.
) And when he'd got nearly home, he looked once more into the hamper, and he saw— Only—Bruno began, but a generous thought struck him, and he looked at me.
(We're getting near the end now,said Bruno.
) And, when he had got a little way, he thought he would look into the hamper, and see how the little Foxes were getting on.
(This man, that they used to call Dunce.
) As the Bellman would tell you,he added with pride, I have uttered that sentiment once.
cried Bruno, clapping his hands.
) Buns, and cake, and 66o SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED —(—and jam?
Shut doors behind you, (Don't slam them, mind you.
) Drink beer, not porter.
) I ran him through with a golden pin, (And what care I for that?
) EARLY VERSE 789 YE FATTALE CHEYSE Ytte wes a mirke an dreiry cave, Weet scroggis ^ owr ytte creepe.
(I fired up like a rocket.
) He did it just for punning s sake: *The man,' says Johnson, 'that would make A pun, would pick a pocket!
(General cheering among the guests.
) He will never recite it again!
(Everybody says a quarter of a pound,which is wrong.
) Ill John gave his brother James a box : About it there were many locks.
If I'm took by a fish (For your bait is your brother, good man!
) Pull him up if you like, but I hope you will strike As gently as ever you can.
How many did he keep?
) SOLUTIONS TO PUZZLES FROM WONDERLAND I Ten.
(It's far too dismal a concern To call a Moderator.
) The duck was tender, but the peas Were very much too old: And just remember, if you please.
It was too quick for a quack, and yet too harsh to be anything else.
) Then he said 'Second little Fox, have you been eating the Apples?
(Frantic excitement, and wild cheering all down the hall, the Professor himself mounting the table in hot haste, to lead the cheering, and waving his spectacles in one hand and a spoon in the other.
) Then the Other Professor got up, and began : — Little Birds are dining Warily and well, Hid in mossy cell: Hid, I say, by waiters Gorgeous in their gaiters— Vve a Tale to tell.
Why was the moon so angry?
) VII When the King found that his money was nearly all gone, and that he really must live more economically, he decided on sending away most of his Wise Men.
added Bruno.
) We got up in great haste, and followed the children upstairs.
said Bruno.
) Yes, jam—and soup — and—(—and sugar plumsT Bruno put in once more; and Sylvie seemed satisfied.
Bruno cried in a great hurry.
) You shouldn't tell it so quick.
If your thoughts incline ever so little towards fuming,you will say fuming-furious; if they turn, by even a hair's breadth, towards furious,you will say furious-fuming; but if you have that rarest of gifts, a perfectly balanced mind, you will sa
* This office was usually undertaken by the Boots, who found in it a refuge from the Baker's constant complaints about the insufficient blacking of his three pairs of boots.
^ darkness, *** brave.
* company.
howl.
* going journeying.
694 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Sylvie sang more courageously, this time: the words seemed to carry her away, out of herself: — 4t f Tis a secret: none \nows how it comes, how it goes: But the name of the secret is hovelAnd clear and strong the chorus
** Once more we heard Bruno's delicate little voice alone : — ''Say whose is the sJ{ill that paints valley and hill, hi\e a picture so fair to the sight?
PHANTASMAGORIA 835 It's very well,said he, for Kings To soar above the earth: But Phantoms often find that wings — Like many other pleasant things — Cost more than they are worth.
**Spectres of course are rich, and so Can buy them from the Elves : But we prefer to keep below — They're stupid company, you know, For any but themselves: For, though they claim to be exempt From pride, they treat a Phantom As something quite beneath co
There is a song here, that I have never heard you sing.
*Hail to thee, blithe spirit!
And turn thy steed for thee!
*This valiant knight, besides having a heart of steel and nerves of iron, has been lately in the habit of carrying a brick in his eye.
The second part is—Here he turned the handle, and, with a loud Oh!
, Bruno dropped both the knobs, and began rubbing his elbows.
5o//?
, I think,seemed to me the safest thing to say.
he suddenly broke of?
, laying his head in Sylvie's lap.
And what would you like next, my little man?
- Well,Bruno said, a little doubtfully, I think I'll take some plum-pudding, please—while I think of it.
Well, let me think: perhaps—you say.
.
Utile Birds are choking Baronets with bun, Taught to fire a gun: Taught, I say, to splinter Salmon in the winter— Merely for the fun.
732 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Little Birds are hiding Crimes in carpet-bags, Blessed by happy stags: Blessed, I say, though beaten— Since our friends are eaten When the memory flags.
All knew him now, and bent low before the Elder Brother, the true Warden.
734 THE BEGGAR S RETURN 735 Brother mine, and Sister mine!
How cruelly I was misjudging her!
744 LIFE OUT OF DEATH 745 N05 no!
Justice Shallow had felt certain that it was either William or Richard, but had not been able to settle which, so that he could not possibly say either name before the other, can it be doubted that, rather than die, he would have gasped out Rilchiam!
756 VERSE INSCRIBED TO A DEAR CHILD: IN MEMORY OF GOLDEN SUMMER HOURS AND WHISPERS OF A SUMMER SEA Girt with a boyish garb for boyish tas\, Eager she wields her spade: yet loves as well Rest on a friendly \nee, intent to as\ The tale \he loves to tell.
There was also a Beaver, that paced on the deck, Or would sit making lace in the bow: And had often (the Bellman said) saved them from wreck Though none of the sailors knew how.
757 758 VERSE There was one who was famed for the number of things He forgot when he entered the ship: His umbrella, his watch, all his jewels and rings.
Though with only one ship and one bell: And he feared he must really decline, for his part, Undertaking another as well.
760 VERSE The Beaver's best course was, no doubt, to procure A second-hand dagger-proof coat — So the Baker advised it—and next, to insure Its Hfe in some Office of note: This the Banker suggested, and offered for hire (On moderate terms), or for sale.
But the danger was past—they had landed at last, With their boxes, portmanteaus, and bags : Yet at first sight the crew were not pleased with the view Which consisted of chasms and crags.
762 VERSE The Bellman perceived that their spirits were low.
And even the Butcher felt queer.
770 VERSE He thought of his childhood, left far behind — That blissful and innocent state — The sound so exactly recalled to his mind A pencil that squeaks on a slate!
Which the Bellman rang close at his ear.
776 VERSE Fit the Seventh The Banker's Fate They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care; They pursued it with forks and hope; They threatened its hfe with a railway-share; They charmed it with smiles and soap.
For the daylight was nearly past.
778 VERSE There is Thingumbob shouting!
And was never allowed any dinner.
782 VERSE BROTHER AND SISTER Sister, sister, go to bed!
Because it is so very far.
784 VERSE RULES AND REGULATIONS A SHORT direction To avoid dejection.
* Perhaps even the burstingheart of its master.
794 VERSE LAYS OF SORROW No.
His name is Kobold,said my guest: One of the Spectre order: You'll very often see him dressed In a yellow gown, a crimson vest, And a night-cap with a border.
836 VERSE He tried the Brocken business first, But caught a sort of chill; So came to England to be nursed, And here it took the form of thirsty Which he complains of still.
Who 'gibbered in the Roman streets,' Dressed, if you recollect, in sheets — They must have found it cold.
842 VERSE I've often spent ten pounds on stuff, In dressing as a- Double; But, though it answers as a puff.
The Mayor and Corporation!
846 VERSE The day he was elected Mayor I \now that every Sprite meant To vote for me^ but did not dare — He was so frantic with despair And furious with excitement.
In fact, I doubt If it was worth his while to go — And who is Tibbs, I'd like to know, To make such work about?
852 VERSE If Tibbs is anything like me, It's possible^'' I said, He won't be over-pleased to be Dropped in upon at half-past three, After he's snug in bed.
Scorch'd by her fierce, relentless eye, Nothingness is my destiny!
8io VERSE LAYS OF MYSTERY, IMAGINATION, AND HUMOUR Number i THE PALACE OF HUMBUG I DREAMT I dwelt in marble halls, And each damp thing that creeps and crawls Went wobble-wobble on the walls.
Vain,she replied, such mockeries: For morbid fancies, such as these, No suits can suit, no plea can please.
8l2 VERSE And bending o'er that man of straw, She cried in grief and sudden awe, Not inappropriately, Law!
But his words impressed my ear no more Than if it were a sieve.
8l4 VERSE He said, I look for soap-bubbles, That lie among the wheat, And bake them into mutton-pies, And sell them in the street.
Or madly squeeze a right-hand foot Into a left-hand shoe; Or if a statement I aver Of which I am not sure, I think of that strange wanderer Upon the lonely moor.
8l6 VERSE MISS JONES (This frolicsome verse was written for a medley of twentytwo tunes that ranged from *'The Captain and His Whiskers'' to Rule Britannia/'^ 'Tis a melancholy song, and it will not keep you long, Tho I specs it will work upon your feeli
Pray lend it me (I hope the gold is pure).
8l8 VERSE And all those rings, & other things—Don't scream, you know, for long ago The policeman off from his beat has gone.
And soothed his sorrow with the strain!
8o6 VERSE CORONACH She is gone by the Hilda, She is lost unto Whitby, And her name is Matilda, Which my heart it was smit by; Tho' I take the Goliah, I learn to my sorrow That *it won't,' said the crier, *Be off till to-morrow.
What was it all about, now.
?
If so, a swarm of bees is simply a single animal whose many limbs are not quite close together!
A FAIRY-DUET 689 It is a bewildering thought,I said, and needs a night's rest to grasp it properly.
) The Majesty of Thought supersedes the work of the fingers.
A Man's severe thinking, plus the shaking-oflF a cigar-ash, comes to BEYOND THESE VOICES 665 the same total as a Woman's trivial fancies, plus the most elaborate embroidery.
said Bruno.
A deal shorter ago than that.
I skip forty years,said the Baker in tears, And proceed without further remark To the day when you took me aboard of your ship To help you in hunting the Snark.
A dear uncle of mine (after whom I was named) Remarked, when I bade him farewell— Oh, skip your dear uncle!
Drink the Emperor's health!
A general gurgling resounded all through the Hall.
Prince Uggug has turned into a Porcupine!
A new Specimen!
844 VERSE But if the host's a man hke you — I mean a man of sense; And if the house is not too new— Why, what has that,'' said I, to do With Ghost's convenience?
A new house does not suit, you knowIt's such a job to trim it: But, after twenty years or so, The wainscotings begin to go, So twenty is the hmit.
Don't know who should be sitting by it,Bruno said thoughtfully to himself.
A old Fox were sitting by it.
I said.
A sort of treat!
Two youths are leading on the steed, Both tugging at the rein; ^This Rectory has been supposed to have been built in the time of Edward VI, but recent discoveries clearly assign its origin to a much earlier period.
A stone has been found in an island formed by the river Tees on which is inscribed the letter A,which is justly conjectured to stand for the name of the great King Alfred, in whose reign this house was probably built.
Muriel.
A sudden terror seemed to chill my very heart.
All of me, that is not Lumbago, is Loyalty!
A sweet sentiment!
I was much struck by the great change a few months had made in the faces of the Imperial Pair.
A vacant stare was now the Emperor s usual expression; while over the face of the Empress there flitted, ever and anon, a meaningless smile.
I pushed open the little wicketgate and slowly took my way among the solemn memorials of the quiet dead, thinking of the many who had, during the past year, disappeared from the place, and had gone to join the majority.
A very few steps brought me in sight of the object of my search.
Who civilly observed Good evening, M'am, I really am surprised to see that you're out here alone,, for you must own from thieves you're not secure.
A watch, I see.
James Burgess, M.
A.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA\AAAAAAA .
AAAAAf, VVVyVVVVVVVVyVVVVV¥VVVVVVvVVVVVVVVVVV II AAA V A/ 1 VVVVVV >» I »>»»»»»»»»»»»»:
Perhaps she thinks it funny.
Aboard of the Hilda, But I've lost purse and money.
(More whispering behind fan,) \ PROLOGUES TO PLAYS 825 Speaker, What!
Acting love!
Maybe it's rolled in there,'' Sylvie suggested, pointing to a dark recess, the door of which stood half open : and Bruno ran in to look.
After a minute he came slowly out again, looking very grave, and carefully shut the cupboard-door after him.
The walking-things had all disappeared!
After the utter failure of the search for the children^ 664 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED there was a very half-hearted search made for their apparel.
There's the Curate: his wife is with him: they have no children.
Then there's the Roman Catholic Priest.
No one took the least notice of me, but I wasn't at all surprised at this, as I had long realised that I was quite invisible to them all—even to Sylvie and Bruno.
All along the gallery, that led to the Prince's apartment, an excited crowd was surging to and fro, and the Babel of voices was deafening: against the door of the 738 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED room three strong men were leaning, vainly trying to shut it—
Like weeds that fringe a poisoned tank.
All birds of evil omen there Flood with rich Notes the tainted air.
he thundered.
All did so, instantly.
The doctors are quite agreed as to that.
All he needs now, they say, is rest, and perfect quiet, and good nursing.
My impression was that His Imperial Fatness was getting more— More what?
All listened breathlessly for the next word.
Fm as jolly as the day is long, except when it's necessary to ruminate on some very difficult subject.
All of me,' 'he murmured sleepily as we left the room, all of me, that isn't Bonhommie^ is Rumination!
The fish hurried up by the dozens.
All ready and eager to bite.
Lady Muriel asked.
All that I shall need as a doctor, certainly.
he proclaimed.
All that is needed now is to feed it three times a day, on chopped carrots and—.
Mystic, awful was the process.
All the family in order Sat before him for their pictures : Each in turn, as he was taken, Volunteered his own suggestions, His ingenious suggestions.
And Bruno had said Don't talk 'ubbish!
All this, while the Other Professor was being extracted.
(Hiawatha seemed to think so, Seemed to think it not unlikely).
All together rang their voices, Angry, loud, discordant voices.
He had learnt it all from Ruskin (Author of The Stones of Venice,Seven Lamps of Architecture,Modern Painters,and some others); And perhaps he had not fully Understood his author's meaning; But, whatever was the reason.
All was fruitless, as the picture Ended in an utter failure.
The Professor looked much shocked.
Almost anything would be better than that!
Like a monkey in the forest.
Am I sitting still?
He said I'd gladly tell you how, And also tell you why; But(here he gave a little bow) You're in so bad a temper now, You'd think it all a lie.
And as to being in a fright.
So he took the mouth, and he opened it, and shook, and shook!
And at last he shook the little Fox out of its own mouth!
*Now, you silly little Lamb, go home to your mother, and never listen to old Foxes again.
And be very good and obedient.
I could not speak, I could not fly, I fell down in that place, I saw the monster's horrid eye Come leering in my face!
Amidst my scarcely-stifled groans.
And I shall conclude with a few Experiments.
An Axiom^ you know, is a thing that you accept without contradiction.
There's cobwebs—and two spiders—Bruno thoughtfully replied, checking off the catalogue on his fingers, —and the cover of a picture-book—and a tortoise—and a dish of nuts—and an old man.
An old man!
My pardon!
An owd ne'er-do-weel like me!
'An' Vm your Minnie now,' she says.
An' she just puts her dear arms about my neck—and she kisses me on t' cheek—an' may God in Heaven bless her!
'Ay,' says I.
An' she lights the pipe for me.
'Ay,' says I.
An' she mak's the tea.
Why, she were in here only yestere'en, as it were, a-sittin', THE BANQUET 717 as it might be, where you're a-sitting now, an' lookin' sweeter and kinder nor an angel!
An' she says 'You've not got your Minnie, now,' she says, *to fettle for ye.
Bruno interrupted.
And 00 needn't try to look as if it was, Mister Sir!
) And just as he was going to do it, Bruno heard a great ROAR—(The real Bruno put his hand into mine, and held tight), and the Lion came bang through the door, and the next moment it had bitten off the old Fox's head!
And Bruno jumped in at the window, and went leaping round the room, and crying out 'Hooray!
' and then it choked.
And Bruno looked into its mouth, and it was full!
' And they went to the old Sheep.
And Bruno said 'Please, may your little Lamb come to my Picnic?
Oo always forgets the apples!
And Bruno said 'Wo'n't you come with us to my Picnic?
A great big Lion.
And Bruno was ever so frightened, and he ran— No, he wasn't flightened a bit!
) It isn't good manners to ask for a dish before it comes!
And Bruno whispered back But I might forget to ask for some, when it comes, 00 know—I do forget things, sometimes,he added, seeing Sylvie about to whisper more.
she sobbed.
And God meant your life to be so beautiful!
Well, yes,I said, feeling I might safely tell all now.
And I could not find a fitter time or place to say it.
We were both on us a-waiting fur t' train at t' Junction.
And I had setten mysen down upat t' bench.
Dying, perhaps!
And I hastily prepared to leave the house.
The Other Professor caught the word.
And I hope you're enjoying yourself^ little Man?
' For their actual existence^ of course^ one would need evidenced You were saying, the other day,she went on, that you would accept anything^ on good evidence, that was not a priori impossible.
And I think you named Ghosts as an instance of a provable phenomenon.
And that you kept bad wine: So, as a Phantom had to go.
And I was first, of course, you know, I couldn't well decline.
So Bruno said to himself 'The properest thing to do is to have a Picnic, all by myself, on the top of the hill.
And I'll take some Milk, and some Bread, and some Apples: and first and foremost, I want some M//^/' So, first and foremost, Bruno took a milk-pail— And he went and milkted the Cow!
When my brother went away, you lost the best Warden you ever had.
And I've been doing my best, wretched hypocrite that I am, to cheat you into making me an Emperor.
Bruno had had time to say I thought he wanted to see how many peoples was up the chimbley.
And Sylvie had said ''Chimney—not chimbley.
Everything, 'cept the things I dont know.
And Sylvie knows all the rest.
he shouted to the men at the door.
And a general chorus of voices answered him Porcupine!
Then louder, turning to the audience, Her Imperial Highness has made a remark which is perfectly sensible!
And a wild cheei arose from that vast mulitude.
That flec\s the green meadow with sunshine and shadow, Till the little lambs leap with delight?
And again uprose that silvery voice, whose angelic sweetness I could hardly bear: — t< * Tis a secret untold to hearts cruel and cold, Though 'tis sung, by the angels above, In notes that ring clear for the ears that can hear— And the name of the secret
And as to the rod hanging over your head.
And apparently ready to fall, That, you know, was the case, when you lived in that place.
One or two of the fishermen were to meet him on the road, to carry his things the rest of the way.
And are you quite sure you are taking all that you will need?
It seemed to me the proper thing To mix another glass, and sing The following Coronach.
And art thou gone, beloved Ghost?
Scarcely even a howl or a groan.
As the man they called Ho!
And changed his loose silver for notes : The Baker with care combed his whiskers and hair.
And shook the dust out of his coats : The Boots and the Broker were sharpening a spade — Each working the grindstone in turn : But the Beaver went on making lace, and displayed No interest in the concern : 768 VERSE Though the Barrister tried to appeal to
Well, I mean, it wasn't nice,the little fellow corrected himself.
And so Bruno went back to the Lion.
I can hardly imagine his interest in the subject holding out even for those; and, though there is no limit to the degree of the curves he might study, yet surely the time, needed to exhaust all the novelty and interest of the subject, would be absolutely
And so of all other branches of Science.
We haven't got to the Experiments yet.
And so,returning to his note-book, I'll give you the Axioms of Science.
The Bandersnatch fled as the others appeared Led on by that fear-stricken yell : And the Bellman remarked It is just as I feared!
And solemnly tolled on his bell.
Many do, no doubt.
And some forms of Science; but only some, I think.
Some are waiting at the door, And some are following behind.
And some have gone before.
) So the little Foxes ran up to the nursery.
And soon Bruno went into the hall, and rang the big bell.
said Sylvie.
And spoons?
Now tell me, have you any reason for it?
And still I strove to keep back the revelation I felt sure was coming.
^ For though her rider smite her, As hard as he can hit.
And strive to turn her from the yard, * The poet entreats pardon for having represented a donkey under this dignified name.
But the Judge said he never had summed up before; So the Snark undertook it instead.
And summed it so well that it came to far more Than the Witnesses ever had said!
Cold, tired, and cross, and muddy, I had come home, too late to dine.
And supper, with cigars and wine, Was waiting in the study.
) The night was fled, the dawn was nigh: A hurricane went raving by.
And swept the Vision from mine eye.
It was awfully fat when it camed in,said Bruno: so it would be more wonderfuUer if it got thin all in a minute.
And that was the reason, I suppose,the Lord Chancellor suggested, why you didn't give it the rest of the milk?
When chub is good for human food.
And that will never be!
The Bellman indignantly said.
And the Baker replied Let me say it once more.
Your rooms are all ready for you.
And the Emperor and the Empress — well, I think they're rather pleased than otherwise!
the Emperor exclaimed.
And the Gold Stick went oflf like a shot.
Once there were a Locust, and a Magpie, and a Engine' driver.
And the Lesson is, to learn to get up early— It isn't a bit interesting!
And the Lion trotted slowly after him.
And the Lion called after him, in a very gentle voice, 'Little Boy, little Boy!
I said that no doubt that was the real test whether a person was frightened or not.
And the Lion said 'Oh, I live on bread-and-butter, and cherries, and marmalade, and plum-cake—' —and applesT Bruno put in.
' The real Bruno shivered, in sympathy with the hero.
And the Lion said 'Oh, well, we won't talk about it, then!
And he asked the Lion to tell him a story.
And the Lion said 'yes,' it would.
—a delicious new Loaf, ever so light and so puffy.
And the Oven said—Here Sylvie made a long pause.
673 He has shot it, the delicate darling!
And the Voices have ceased from their strife: Not a whisper of sneering or snarling, As he carries it home to his wife: Then, cheerily champing the bunlet His spouse was so s\ilful to ba\e, He hies him once more to the runlet, To fetch her the Dra\e!
the Professor cheerily replied.
And the children have come back, you see!
Only he would try again.
And the next time he tumbleded off, he hurted his self welly much, and breaked off ever so much varnish.
I ca'n't leave out all about the lessons!
And the old Sheep said 'Do you know your ABC yet?
The Empress will take care of the children.
And the two Brothers went away together, arm-in-arm.
She nodded : no words came.
And then I can go with a willing heart—to do God's work—knowing that we are one—and that we are together in spirit^ though not in bodily presence—and are most of all together when we pray!
And to them he has added another.
And then a great hook he took from his book.
So Bruno went a little further along the road.
And then he heard it again, that queer noise—Thump!
And I have much to do before then.
And then he told us how he had spent his hour of absence.
But the sight of her has been new life to him.
And then he went on to tell us, in would-be careless tones—I knew how he hated any display of feeling—how he had insisted on going back to the plague-stricken town, to bring away a man whom the doctor had abandoned as dying, but who might, he fancied, r
I wondered what on earth they were, That looked all head and sack; But Mother told me not to stare.
And then she twitched me by the hair, And punched me in the back.
This Boy kept his a whole year!
And then the next birthday would begin,said Sylvie.
And I told her what I had never yet breathed to any other listener, of my double life, and, more than that (for mine might have been but a noonday-dream), of the double life of those two dear children.
And when I told her of Bruno's wild gambols, she laughed merrily; and when I spoke of Sylvie's sweetness and her utter unselfishness and trustful love, she drew a deep breath, like one who hears at last some precious tidings for which the heart has ached
' And Bruno went down the hill.
And when he got to the brook, he saw the Lamb sitting on the bank: and who should be sitting by it but an old Fox!
Only little things nibble—little thin sharp things, with edges— Well then, it 'nubbled^' said Sylvie.
And when it had nubbled all his head off, he went away, and he never said 'thank you'!
I shook my head, not liking to speak: and Sylvie went on.
And when they got to the house, Bruno looked in at the window.
'Chapter XV The Little Foxes **So, when they got to the top of the hill, Bruno opened the hamper : and he took out the Bread, and the Apples, and the Milk: and they ate, and they drank.
And when they'd finished the Milk, and eaten half the Bread and half the Apples, the Lamb said 'Oh, my paws is so sticky!
Farewell, farewell, sweet sister, I'm going o'er the sea.
And when will you come back again, My brother, tell to me?
Dear Cook, please lend a frying-pan To me as quickly as you can.
And wherefore should I lend it you?
We visit for a single day.
And whether then we go, or stay.
The idea seemed too wild for belief.
And yet, are there not ''more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in our philosophy'?
Your C's!
And your D's!
Yes,with a carelessness that was evidently put on: <» ]ust a sentence or two more.
And, as they were walking along, they looked over Bruno's picnic 651 a hedge, and who should they see but a Uttle black Lamb!
Now, may not our life, a million years hence, have the same relation, to our life now, that the man's life has to the child's?
And, just as one might try, all in vain, to express to that child, in the language of bricks and ninepins, the meaning of 'politics,' so perhaps all those descriptions of Heaven, with its music, and its feasts, and its streets of gold, may be only attempt
Depends on circumstances.
And, though we don't consult 'Mine Host' Before the thing's arranged.
For a few minutes we sat quite silent : then the Earl left the room, and soon returned to tell us that Arthur had gone away with the two fishermen, leaving word that he would be back in about an hour.
And, true enough, at the end of that interval—during which very little was said, none of us seeming to have the heart to talk—the frontdoor once more creaked on its rusty hinges, and a step was 676 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED heard in the passage, hardly t
Spoons in their hands!
And, when they got into the dining-room, there was ever such a white table-cloth on the table!
BrUUO murmured, raising himself on tiptoe to kiss the little red star.
And, when you look at it, it's red and fierce like the sun—and, when you look through it, it's gentle and blue like the sky!
There be only one verse more,the Gardener sadly replied.
And, with tears streaming down his cheeks, he sang the last verse: — He thought he saw an Argument That proved he was the Pope: He loo\ed again, and found it was A Bar of Mottled Soap.
And I had prayed.
And—andhis voice broke, and I could only just catch the concluding words, there is a God that answers prayer!
) i 720 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED By this time a waiter had suppUed Bruno with a plateful of somethings which drove the plum-pudding out of his head.
Another advantage of dinner-parties,the Professor cheerfully explained, for the benefit of anyone that would hsten, is that it helps you to see your friends.
HIAWATHA'S PHOTOGRAPHING [In an age of imitation, I can claim no special merit for this slight attempt at doing what is known to be so easy.
Any fairly practised writer, with the slightest ear for rhythm, could compose, for hours together, in the easy running metre of The Song of Hiawatha.
*We have lost half the day.
Any further delay.
And you?
Are you any better yet?
Are you not mine?
Are you not,(with all the old playfulness of manner) as Bruno would say, 'my very mine}'' He bade a long and loving adieu to the Earl and to me, and left the room, accompanied only by his wife, who was A NEWSPAPER-CUTTING 679 bearing up bravely, and wa
he said.
Aren't you sorry, Sylvie?
It is not yours to give!
Arthur had recovered himself by this time, and could reply quite firmly, That is true,he said.
That's your sentiment, isn't it, only better expressed?
Arthur looked into the radiant, mischievous face, with a grave and very tender smile.
Forester.
Arthur stepped outside at once, and we heard his cheery Well, my men?
There on the bed, he lay—pale and worn—the mere shadow of his old self—my old friend come back again from the dead!
Arthur!
And still he seemed to grow more white, More vapoury, and wavier — Seen in the dim and flickering light.
As he proceeded to recite His Maxims of Behaviour.
And if Bones plagues him anyhow — Squeaking and all the rest of it.
As he was doing here just now — / prophesy there'll be a row.
So engrossed was the Butcher, he heeded them not.
As he wrote with a pen in each hand.
Yet no catastrophe has followed.
As some old poet says, 'God is where he was'> ?
Sylvie murmured despairingly, to the irresponsive birds.
At last, taking a leaf out of Bruno's book, I ventured on a remark.
she eagerly replied.
At least—Eric is here.
I As no topic of conversation seemed to occur to any one, and as we were, all four, on those delightful terms with one another (the only terms, I think, on which any friendship, that deserves the name of intimacy^ can be maintained) which involve no sort
At length I broke the silence by asking Is there any fresh news from the harbour about the Fever .
And think you that I should be dumb, And full dolorum omnium^ Excepting when you choose to come And share my dinner?
At other times be sour and glum And daily thinner?
I dared say no more, but rose and left her.
At the entrance-gate to the Earl's house I waited, leaning on the gate and watching the sun set, revolving many memories—some happy, some sorrowful—until Lady Muriel joined me.
And shall not we, in this our mimic scene, Be all that better actors e'er have been ?
Awake again a Kemble's tragic tone, And make a Liston's humour all our own?
Ah, happy he who owns that tenderest joy, T'he heart-love of a child!
Away, fond thoughts, and vex my soul no more!
The vision was fast slipping from my eager gaze : but it seemed to me, in that last bewildering moment, that not Sylvie but an angel was looking out through those trustful brown eyes, and that not Sylvie's but an angel's voice was whispering it is LOVE.
A»»»»»»»»»»»»»X«««««««««««««A A I V V V V V V Verse i A A & A I V V »»>»»»»»»»»»»»««««
(mysteriously) What should you say If they were going to act—a little play?
B.
(pointing to audience) But will it please the rest?
B.
(shaking her off) Yes, of course!
B.
Ask the housekeeper to step here,she said, and to bring the children's walking-things with her.
BEYOND THESE VOICES 663 Pve brought them, my Lady/' said the obsequious housekeeper, entering after another minute of silence.
When crying children go to bed, A struggling, kicking load; We'll talk of Ulfrid Longbow's deed, How, in his brother's utmost need.
Back to his aid he flew with speed.
Hush!
Be kind enough to move—angularly—to this corner,the Professor said, addressing himself to Bruno.
He wrung his hoofs, he rent his hair.
Because he could not jump.
Oh yes!
Because, you know, they'll do their best!
Gladstone's very kind permission).
Before the courses will be handed round An Entret made of Children, nicely browned.
*' That Camel passed, and left him there.
Beside the ruined Pump.
Among a more well-to-do race, there would no doubt have been names marked on the clothes; but here no such evidence is forthcoming.
Besides the poor fishermen and their families, there were but five persons to be accounted for: and it was ascertained, beyond a doubt, that all five are numbered with the dead.
But that is only half the picture,I said.
Besides working for oneself^ may there not be the helping of others?
Bruno said with great decision.
Besides, Bruno wasn't Bruno, 00 know—I mean, Bruno wasn't me—I mean—don't talk nonsense, Sylvie!
Black's quite a respectable colour.
Besides, soap would be no use without water— Keeping his back well turned away from the audience, he went on with the Introductory Verses : — Little Birds are writing Interesting boo\s, To be read by coo\s: Read, I say, not roasted— hetterpress, when to
If at a quarter-pastmake haste To be down with the rest.
Better to be before your time.
This was done in a moment.
Blankets now!
I'm sorry she said that^' I put in, thinking it was the only instance I had ever known of pride of rank showing itself in Lady Muriel.
Bless you, it werena prided' said the old man, reading my thoughts.
Really I don't know what an Oven begins with, when it wants to speak!
Both children looked appealingly at me; but I could only say, helplessly^ I haven't the least idea!
''That result,he blandly remarked, was merely a case of mistaken identity.
Both children looked puzzled.
'Tingle, tingle, tingle!
Breakfast, breakfast, breakfast!
Shall we set the dogs at him?
Bring him here!
Let us return to the Banquet.
Brother, will you lead the way?
And the Apple-Tree said—Here followed another long pause.
Bruno adopted his favourite expedient of tapping his forehead; while Sylvie gazed earnestly upwards, as if she 648 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED hoped for some suggestion from the birds, who were singing merrily among the branches overhead.
Suppose we get the Professor to tell us a story.
Bruno adopted the idea with enthusiasm.
And the Banker, inspired with a courage so new It was matter for general remark, Rushed madly ahead and was lost to their view In his zeal to discover the Snark.
But while he was seeking with thimbles and care, A Bandersnatch swiftly drew nigh And grabbed at the Banker, who shrieked in despair, For he knew it was useless to fly.
He gived it me,said Bruno.
But you shouldn't ask for things?
Then in the morning you'll hear THE LITTLE FOXES 659 the bell ring for breakfast.
But you wont have any breakfast!
Yes,said the Earl, so long as there were any others needing help.
But, given ages and ages more, surely all created reasons would at length reach the same dead level of satiety.
Yet dared not quit my post.
But, keeping still the end in view To which I hoped to come, I strove to prove the matter true By putting everything I knew Into an axiom : Commencing every single phrase With ^'thereforeor because,I blindly reeled, a hundred ways, About the syllogis
The result we proceed to divide, as you see.
By Nine Hundred and Ninety and Two: Then subtract Seventeen, and the answer must be Exactly and perfectly true.
This remark gave the tone to our conversation.
By a tacit mutual consent, we avoided, during this our first meeting after her great sorrow, the painful topics that filled our thoughts, and talked like light-hearted children who had never known a care.
You'll find that you can jumplThat Pig looked up with joyful start: Oh Frog, you are a trumpl Your words have healed my inward smart— Come, name your fee and do your part: Bring comfort to a broken heart.
By teaching me to jump!
You can keep a Medicine^ for years and years: but nobody ever wants to keep a Disease!
By the way, come and look at the platform.
Nor guessed : I only know That, when at last my sense returned, The lamp, neglected, dimly burned — The fire was getting low — Through driving mists I seemed to see A Thing that smirked and smiled : And found that he was giving me A lesson in Biography, A
Canto IV Hys Nouryture Oh, when I was a little Ghost, A merry time had we!
That's true enough,said he, yet stay— I listened in all meekness — ''Union is strength, I'm bound to say; In fact, the thing's as clear as day; But onions are a weakness.
Canto VI Discomfyture As one who strives a hill to climb, Who never climbed before: Who finds it, in a little time, Grow every moment less sublime, And votes the thing a bore: Yet, having once begun to try, Dares not desert his quest, But, climbing, eve
A nod, and he was gone.
Canto VII Sad Souvenaunce What's this?
We've seen plenty of Specimens.
Certainly, certainly!
Hope is entertained for all the others: though there are two or three cases where the vital powers seem to be so entirely exhausted that it is but hoping against hopeto regard ultimate recovery as even possible.
Chapter XIX A Fairy-Duet The year—what an eventful year it had been for me!
I seemed to hear myself say.
Chapter XVI Beyond These Voices ^'I didn't quite catch what you said!
No!
Chapter XVIII A Newspaper-Cutting EXTRACT FROM THE 'TAYFIELD CHRONICLE.
But the Empress had had enough spinach by this time, and somehow—I failed to notice the exact process—we 7o6 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED all found ourselves in the Pavilion, and the Professor in the act of beginning the long-expected Lecture.
Chapter XXI The Professor's Lecture '*In Science—in fact, in most things—it is usually best to begin at the beginning.
Cats speaks welly quick!
Chapter XXIII The Pig-Tale By this time the appetites of the guests seemed to be nearly satisfied, and even Bruno had the resolution to say, when the Professor offered him a fourth slice of plum-pudding, I thinks three helpings is enough!
The Lord Chancellor, forgetting all the rules of Courtceremony, ran full speed down the hall, and in a minute returned, pale and gasping for breath.
Chapter XXIV The Beggar's Return ''Your Imperial Highnesses!
There's nuffin to wait for, oo know!
Chapter XXV Life Out of Death The sound of kicking, or knocking, grew louder every moment: and at last a door opened somewhere near us.
' Down came the little Foxes, in such a hurry for their supper!
Clean pinafores?
Our second Specimen,he went on, carefully opening a small jar, is—here he removed the lid, and a large beetle instantly darted out, and with an angry buzz went straight out of the Pavilion, —is—or rather, I should say,looking sadly into the empty
Did anyone happen to remark—as it went past—three blue spots under each wmgr Nobody had remarked them.
'A fact so dread,' he faintly said, 'Extinguishes all hopeI' Choking with sobs, the Gardener hastily stepped on a few yards ahead of the party, to conceal his emotion.
Did he see the Bar of Mottled Soap?
Why should not other similar essences exist around us, not linked on to a visible and material body?
Did not God make this swarm of happy insects, to dance in this sunbeam for one hour of bliss, for no other object, that we can imagine, than to swell the sum of conscious happiness?
Diddle!
Diddle!
For the Snark's a peculiar creature, that won't Be caught in a commonplace way.
Do all that you know, and try all that you don't: Not a chance must be wasted to-day!
She was quite calm again now.
Do come in,she said.
And the words are all different!
Do look at it!
My gentle censors, let me roundly ask.
Do none but actors ever wear a mask ?
I never J^new a Pig so wide— That wobbled so from side to side— Who could, however much he tried.
Do such a thing as jump!
she added hesitatingly.
Do you believe in Fairies?
The Professor sighed, and gave it up.
Do you know what a Boojum is?
Label it, indeed!
Do you want to be eaten up?
Muriel, my child, sing us something before we go to bed!
Do,said Arthur, as he rose and lit the candles on the cottage-piano, lately banished from the drawing-room to make room for a semi-grand.
Bring a large cage,he said to the people generally, with strong bars of steel, and a portcullis made to go up and down like a mouse-trap!
Does anyone happen to have such a thing about him?
Last time, I remember, I chanced to pass just as Lady Muriel was coming away from the house.
Does she still come to see you ?
Having by coming proved you find a charm in it.
Don't go away, and hint there may be harm in it.
Come, Bruno, put on your hat.
Don't keep the dear Professor waiting!
It seemed to me that you had been (Before she had this fit) An obstacle, that came between Him, and ourselves, and it.
Don't let him know she liked them best, For this must ever be A secret, kept from all the rest, Between yourself and me.
The next time you have toasted cheese.
Don't let thefn send it cold» PHANTASMAGORIA 837 You'd find the bread improved, I think, By getting better flour: And have you anything to drink That looks a little less like ink.
Come out!
Don't shiver there!
' I have the book; so if you doubt it— I turned to search the shelf.
Don't stir!
To walk four miles through mud and rain, To spend the night in smoking, And then to find that it's in vain — And I've to do it all again — It's really too provoking!
Don't talk!
Canto II Hys Fyve Rules My First—but don't suppose,he said, I'm setting you a riddle — Is—if your Victim be in bed.
Don't touch the curtains at his head.
Once more, don't stutter.
Don't waste your money, Abstain from honey.
I'm sure of it!
Don't you know her voice .
cried Bruno.
Don't you remember, Sylvie?
I said, as with true English instincts, we drew our chairs together round the fire-place, though no fire was burning—Lady Muriel having taken the heap of music on her knee, to have one more search for the strangely-vanished song.
Don't you sometimes feel a wild longing,she said, addressing herself to me, to have something more to do with your hands, while you talk, than just holding a cigar, and now and then knocking off the ash?
So it would be his birthday always^ So it were,said Bruno.
Doos 00 have treats on oor birthday, Mister Sir.
And he filled a glass and handed it to Bruno.
Drink this, my dear, and you'll be quite another man!
Rule 42 of the Code, ''No one shall spea\ to the Man at the Helm,'' had been completed by the Bellman himself with the words ''and the Man at the Helm shall speaf{ to no oneT So remonstrance was impossible, and no steering could be done till the next varn
During these bewildering intervals the ship usually sailed backwards.
So shalt thou cull a floweret fair.
E'en from a fading flower.
Jones, You're screaming in your sleep!
EARLY VERSE 787 MISUNDERSTANDINGS If such a thing had been my thought, I should have told you so before, But as I didn't, then you ought To ask for such a thing no more, For to teach one who has been taught Is always thought an awful bore.
^ An additional vexation would be that his Returnticket would be no use the next day.
EARLY VERSE 793 Too long it were to tell of each conjecture Of chicken suicide, and poultry victim, The deadly frown, the stern and dreary lecture, The timid guess, perhaps some needle pricked him!
^ She was sister to both.
EARLY VERSE 797 And now commenced a struggle Between that steed and rider, For all the strength that he hath left Doth not suffice to guide her.
^ haul, ^all.
EARLY VERSE 79I LAYS OF SORROW No.
Till even the poet is aghast, PHANTASMAGORIA 865 'A touching Valentine at last The post shall carry, When thirteen days are gone and past Of February.
Farewell, dear friend, and when we meet, In desert waste or crowded street.
But the Barrister, weary of proving in vain That the Beaver's lace-making was wrong.
Fell asleep, and in dreams saw the creature quite plain That his fancy had dwelt on so long.
the Lord Chancellor replied with much solemnity, as he rose to his feet to give the necessary directions for the ceremony.
Fill your glasses!
To have partially succeeded.
Finally my Hiawatha Tumbled all the tribe together, (Groupedis not the right expression), And, as happy chance would have it Did at last obtain a picture Where the faces all succeeded: Each came out a perfect likeness.
This aren't a comfable leaf, Sylvie.
Find me a comfabler—please!
And he sat bolt upright, and put on an absurdly solemn face.
First 00 must sit up as straight as pokers— —as a poker,Sylvie corrected him.
Goes once round the house,^ Half afraid of a mouse, Then sinks calmly to rest On the top of her nest.
First doubling up each of her legs.
It'll begin in an hour,the Professor said, evading 700 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED the question.
First, we must have something to surprise the Empress.
And we sha'n't catch a Snark before night!
Fit the Eighth The Vanishing They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care; They pursued it with forks and hope; They threatened its life with a railway-share; They charmed it with smiles and soap.
And I use it for striking a light : 766 VERSE But if ever I meet with a Boojum, that day, In a moment (of this I am sure), I shall softly and suddenly vanish away — And the notion I cannot endure!
Fit the Fourth The Hunting The Bellman looked uffish, and wrinkled his brow.
The Beaver kept looking the opposite way, And appeared unaccountably shy.
Fit the Second The Bellman's Speech The Bellman himself they all praised to the skies — Such a carriage, such ease and such grace!
And when quarrels arose—as one frequently finds Quarrels will, spite of every endeavour — The song of the Jubjub recurred to their minds, And cemented their friendship for ever!
Fit the Sixth The Barrister's Dream They sought it with thimbles, they sought it with care; They pursued it with forks and hope; They threatened its life with a railway-share; They charmed it with smiles and soap.
I am sure that our state's very nearly alike (Not considering the question of slaughter).
For I have my perch on the top of the bridge.
/ never heard an Oven speak!
For a minute or two we all sat silent; and then Bruno said, very softly, Oven begins wiz 'O'.
No creature heeds the treacherous call.
For all those goodly Strawn Baits Pall.
I've got so many other things to attend to.
For instance, I'm Court-Physician.
In some things, fo course, it's better to begin at the other end.
For instance, if you wanted to paint a dog green, it might be best to begin with the tail^ as it doesn't bite at that end.
The setting-up is always worst: Such heaps of things you want at first, One must be made of money!
For instance, take a Haunted Tower, With skull, cross-bones, and sheet; Blue lights to burn (say) two an hour, Condensing lens of extra power.
Humpty-Dumpty's theory, of two meanings packed into one word like a portmanteau, seems to me the right explanation for all.
For instance, take the two words fumingand furious.
V That salmon and sole Puss should think very grand Is no such remarkable thing.
For more of these dainties Puss took up her stand; But when the third sister stretched out her fair hand Pray why should Puss swallow her ring?
'Twas my heart-cherished wish for to slay many fish Each day did my malice grow worse.
For my heart didn't soften with doing it so often, But rather, I should say, the reverse.
Come into account again.
For take notice, it may be true.
For, although common Snarks do no manner of harm^ Yet I feel it my duty to say Some are Boojums—The Bellman broke off in alarm.
For the Baker had fainted away.
One gets tired as night draws on,he added, with a touch of sadness in his voice, and one gets to long for bed!
For those welcome words *Come, child, 'tis bed-time!
And a perch has got hold of my knee.
For water my thirst was not great at the first, And of fish I have quite sufficien— Oh fear not!
Take my friends and my home—as an outcast I'll roam: Take the money I have in the Bank; It is just what I wish, but deprive me of fish^ And my life would indeed be a blank!
Forth from the house his sister came, Her brothers for to see.
2 Fair stands the ancient ^ Rectory, The Rectory of Croft, The sun shines bright upon it, The breezes whisper soft.
From all the house and garden, Its inhabitants come forth, And muster in the road without.
I don't remember the name^^' said the Professor: and the label has come off.
He emptied it quickly into the other bottle, and, with a tremendous bang, both bottles flew to pieces, upsetting all the machines, and filling the Pavilion with thick black smoke.
Or you've a grand digestion!
He goes about and sits on folk That eat too much at night: His duties are to pinch, and poke.
It next will be right To describe each particular batch: Distinguishing those that have feathers, and bite.
From thosethat have whiskers, and scratch.
Arent it, Sylvie?
GAMMON AND SPINACH 703 A loud blast o£ trumpets interrupted this conversation.
They should, by rights.
Give them a chance—because, you know, The tastes o£ people differ so, Especially in Sprites.
Then—'Why hasn't 00 brushed oor hair?
Go and brush it torec\ly!
But you must not stay longer now, my darling!
Go home and take some rest.
And here the poor old man broke down entirely, and could say no more.
God bless her!
God bless you!
God bless you!
''God's own sky,Sylvie said, dreamily.
God's own sky,the little fellow repeated, as they stood, lovingly clinging together, and looking out into the night.
God meant it to be beautiful,I whispered, and surely it was beautiful?
God's purpose never fails!
He was sitting out in the porch, looking just as he did when I first saw him at Fayfield Junction—it seemed only a few days ago!
Good evening!
I said, pausing.
Good evening, Maister!
he broke off in wild confusion.
Good gracious!
'*He's sound asleep now,said Sylvie, carefully tucking in the edge of a violet-leaf, which she had been spreading over him as a sort of blanket: good night!
Good night!
And Bruno solemnly shook hands with the old man, who gazed at him with a loving smile, while Sylvie bent down to press her sweet lips upon his forehead.
Good night, little ones!
It's getting light!
Good-night, old Turnip-top, good-night!
858 VERSE Dressed in jewels and in satin Far too gorgeous for an empress.
Gracefully she sat down sideways, With a simper scarcely human, Holding in her hand a bouquet Rather larger than a cabbage.
Hold it firmlv in his left-hand; He would keep his right-hand buried (Like Napoleon) in his waistcoat; He would contemplate the distance With a look of pensive meaning, As of ducks that die in tempests.
Grand, heroic was the notion: Yet the picture failed entirely: Failed, because he moved a little, Moved, because he couldn't help it.
I was startled to hear, thus repeated by Lady Muriel, the very words of the darling child whom I had seen weeping so bitterly over the dead hare.
Had some mysterious influence passed, from that sweet fairy-spirit, ere she went back to Fairyland, into the human spirit that loved her so dearly?
A Billiard-marker, whose skill was immense, Might perhaps have won more than his share — But a Banker, engaged at enormous expense.
Had the whole of their cash in his care.
I pondered.
Have I slept?
Eh, but life has been rare an' lonely without her!
He covered his face in his hands: and I waited a minute or two, in silence, for him to recover himself.
It was evident that he was very much out of temper: and we were not long in learning the cause of this.
He did not consider the preparations, made for the Imperial party, to be such as suited their rank.
said Sylvie.
He did shake hands with it.
It's only Eric Lindon after all!
I thought, half relieved and half annoyed.
Silently I shook hands with Eric and with the Earl : and with one consent we moved into the shaded side of the room, where we could talk without disturbing the invalid, who lay, silent and happy, holding his wife's hand in his, and watching her with eye
He has been delirious till to-day,Eric explained in a low voice : and even to-day he has been wandering more than once.
'Tm too stupid for Greek and for Latin, Fm too lazy by half for a race, So I'll even go up to yonder bridge, And there we will angle for dace.
He has fitted together two joints of his rod.
It aren't nice to be divided!
He hasn't got a knife, silly boy!
I shivered in terror, and Bruno clapped his hands with delight.
He is flightened, Sylvie!
More prickly!
He must be sent for at once!
When it was over, for a whim.
He ran to tell the King; And being the reverse of slim, A two-mile trot was not for him A very easy thing.
] She's all my fancy painted him (I make no idle boast) ; If he or you had lost a limb, Which would have suffered most?
He said that you had been to her, And seen me here before; But, in another character, She was the same of yore.
There are more Introductory Verses to come,said 730 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED the Other Professor, but I'm hungry.
He sat down, cut a large sUce of cake, put it on Bruno's plate, and gazed at his own empty plate in astonishment.
And repeated in musical tone Some jokes he had kept for a season of woe — But the crew would do nothing but groan.
He served out some grog with a liberal hand, And bade them sit down on the beach : And they could not but own that their Captain looked grand, As he stood and delivered his speech.
Let us drench him, from toplet to toelet, With Nursery-Songs!
He shall muse upon 'Hey!
Sinks not in grief and wild amaze, But, wiser wooer.
He spends the time in writing lays.
Here are some of my memoranda.
He took down from the shelf a heap of little bits of paper, pinned together in twos and threes.
He's rather tired, I think.
He wants the Lecture to begin.
THE BEGGAR S RETURN 737 But the Professor took no notice of the question.
He was eagerly Hstening to the Gold Stick's reply.
, and Emma his wife.
He was the Curate at the Harbour, not thirty years old, and had been married only two years.
Mary Hall, were friends of the author.
He wrote two plays for performance at their house.
I know it for certain now.
He wrung my hand once more, and left me suddenly.
and found it was A letter from \his— make way there!
He's a-coming!
In fact.
Her Highness said 'I hope they'll be in time for the Banquet!
My brain is fire—my heart is lead!
Her soul is flint, and what am I ?
We waited in the room a minute or two, till the sound of wheels had told us that Arthur had driven away; and even then we waited still, for the step of Lady Muriel, going upstairs to her room, to die away in the distance.
Her step, usually so light and joyous, now sounded slow and weary, like one who plods on under a load of hopeless misery; and I felt almost as hopeless, and almost as wretched, as she.
Inspector Kobold came to you— The little Ghost began.
Here I broke in—Inspector who?
And he led the children upon the platform, to explain the arrangements to them.
Here are three seats, you see, for the Emperor and the Empress and Prince Uggug.
GAMMON AND SPINACH 705 If 00 want to startle people,said Bruno, 00 should put live frogs on their backs.
Here the cooks all came in again, in a procession, the Head-Cook coming last and carrying something, which the others tried to hide by waving flags all round it.
My poor client's fate now depends on your votes.
Here the speaker sat down in his place, And directed the Judge to refer to his notes And briefly to sum up the case.
I thought the young lady would have come to my room to put on her boots.
Here's your boots, my love!
He does his spelling very nicely.
Hes cleverer than he kjiowsT she added, aside, to me.
said the Emperor: for the unhappy man seemed almost too frightened to go on, His Imperial Fathess was graciously pleased to be sulky.
His Imperial Fatness was graciously pleased to box my ears.
While, for those who preferred a more forcible word, He had different names from these: His intimate friends called him Candle-ends,And his enemies Toasted-cheese.
His form is ungainly—his intellect small— (So the Bellman would often remark) — But his courage is perfect!
And thee, oh, my 'Tilda!
His pin of gold the youth undid And in his waistcoat-pocket hid, Then gently folded hand in hand.
Oh, horrid was that Pig's despair!
His shrie\s of anguish filled the air.
Which was filled with the heaviest mortar.
His sister, named Lucy OTinner, Grew constantly thinner and thinner; The reason was plain, She slept out in the rain.
It was not thought prudent to remove the body, for burial elsewhere: and accordingly it was at once committed to the ground, along with four others found in different houses, with all due reverence.
His wife, whose maiden name was Lady Muriel Orme, had been married to him on the very morning on which he undertoo\ his self-sacrificing mission.
The Emperor had begun his speech almost before the words were uttered.
However unwilling to be Emperor —since you all wish me to be Emperor—you know how badly the late Warden managed things—with such enthusiasm as you have shown—he persecuted you—he taxed you too heavily—you know who is fittest man to be Emperor—my brother
I went down to the harbour several times, but no one knows which of those vast graves it is.
However, they showed me the house he died in : that was some comfort.
She might do worse, I told her so; She was a fool to answer No.
However, things are as they stood; Nor would I have her if I could.
Well, it's not exactly a conjuring lecture,the Professor said, as he arranged some curious-looking machines on the table.
However, what can you do ?
Canto III Scarmoges And did you really walk,said I, On such a wretched night?
I always fancied Ghosts could flyIf not exactly in the sky, Yet at a fairisji height.
675 ever won the Victoria Cross!
I am certain that no one o£ the three will ever leave the place merely to save his own life.
It'll be a jolly Banquet, now you've come, my little man!
I am so glad to see you agam!
You are better off here with your perch!
I am sure you'll allow you are happier now, With nothing to do but to play; And this single line here, it is perfectly clear, Is much better than thirty a day!
' A man,said he, is not a King.
I argued for a while, And did my best to prove the thing — The Phantom merely listening With a contemptuous smile.
Are we four destined ever to meet again, on this side the grave?
I asked myself, as I walked to my home.
How long did he keep his birthday?
I asked.
The Gold Stick came forwards.
I attended on His Imperial Fatness,was the statement made by the trembling official.
I wish to you a very good night, my Lady.
I betake myself to my bed—to dream—if that indeed I be not dreaming now!
Bruno asked me.
I brightened up, and said It must have been!
Guess agam!
I ca'n't guess,said the Professor.
said Bruno.
I can do some conjuring-tricks.
And now two roads to choose from Are in that rider's sight: In front the road to Dalton, And New Croft upon the right.
I can't get by!
One can be so quiet here,she resumed.
I come here every—every day.
I exclaimed.
I could not say another word.
PHANTASMAGORIA 839 *'That story is in print!
I cried.
And always, in the answer, get The question back again.
I did not hear a word he said, But kicked that old man calm.
Even the memories of my lost friend and companion were sunny as the genial weather that smiled around me.
I did not venture to trouble Lady Muriel, or her father, with another call so soon: but took a walk into the country, and only turned homewards when the low sunbeams warned me that day would soon be over.
You \now you shouldn't!
I didn't ask,said Bruno, taking a fresh mouthful: he gived it me.
Bruno exclaimed in delight, as we went out into the garden.
I do believe he's been singing that very song ever since we went away!
Serves but to let the dusk in— But please,said I, to recollect 'Twas fashioned by an architect Who pinned his faith on Ruskin!
I don't care who he was.
the Professor heartily rejoined.
I don't know that we shall exactly require—but it's convenient to know.
Have the Uttle darhngs hid themselves?
I don't see them, just now,Lady Muriel replied, rather evasively.
' Bruno smiled at the Professor.
I doos enjoy it,he said.
he added, as an after-thought, in obedience to a warning finger held up by Sylvie.
I doosn't like being feet-upwards!
I heard him then, for I had just Completed my design To keep the Menai bridge from rust By boiling it in wine.
I duly thanked him, ere I went, For all his stories queer.
But—^,her voice quivered, but there is anotherT No need for further question.
I eagerly followed her in.
Fayre Syr, hov^ deemest thou of yt ?
Yt ys—thys bytte of rhyme.
Aren't your Not a bit,said Bruno.
I heard—but Sylvie put her hand over his mouth, and spoke for him.
'Bruno peered up anxiously into my face, to see how I took it.
I hung my head, and put a thumb into my mouth, to the evident delight of the little fellow.
persisted the little fellow.
I know ever so many things!
And then what is there to look forward to?
I know that weary feeling,said the young Doctor.
'tis delightfuUer far To kill them than let them go free!
I know there are people who prate by the hour Of the beauty of earth, sky, and ocean; Of the birds as they fly, of the fish darting by, Rejoicing in Life and^n Motion.
The calmness—almost indifference—of her manner quite took me by surprise.
I little guessed what a fierce restraint she was putting upon herself.
This is the Medicine for today^' he went on, taking down a large jug from a shelf.
I mixed it, myself, first thing this morning.
she quoted low From Byron and from Tennyson.
I need not tell of soup and fish In solemn silence swallowed.
827 828 VERSE How came you here,I said, and why?
I never saw a thing so shy.
He said A flutter of alarm Is not unnatural, is it?
I really feared you meant some harm: But, now I see that you are calm.
And Station-Maister, he comes and he orders me off—fur t' mak' room for her Ladyship, you understand?
I remember it all,I said.
No doubt of it!
I replied.
And sounds perhaps like fibs: But still it's true as true can be — As sure as your name's Tibbs,said he.
I said My name's not Tibbs.
You may charge me with murder—or want of sense(We are all of us weak at times) : But the slightest approach to a false pretence Was never among my crimes!
I said it in Hebrew—I said it in Dutch — I said it in German and Greek : But I wholly forgot (and it vexes me much) That English is what you speak!
The Earl is ill!
I said to myself.
No use to try and stop them!
I said, as they passed away into the shadows.
I hope that is it!
I said.
It will be many a year before you lose your hold of thatr Yet surely many human interests survive human Life?
I said.
PHANTASMAGORIA 843 Canto V Byckerment Don't they consult the 'Victims,' though?
I said.
And may I ask you for ' Another drop o£ gravy?
I sat and looked at him in awe, For certainly I never saw A thing so white and wavy.
786 VERSE HORRORS (1850) Methought I walked a dismal place Dim horrors all around; The air was thick with many a face, And black as night the ground.
I saw a monster come with speed.
The excitement had nothing to do with it!
I say, look here, you know!
he said, most good-naturedly.
I shall give it you with memory alone!
And my own personal needs are few: I shall not even take any of my own wardrobe—there is a fisherman's suit, readymade, that is waiting for me at my lodgings.
I shall only take my watch, and a few books, and—stay—there is one book I should like to add, a pocket-Testament—to use at the bedsides of the sick and dying— Take mine!
He staid pinJ^r laughed Sylvie.
I shouldn't kiss you like this, you know, if you were blac\r Oo'd have to!
No need for Bones to hurry so!
I sobbed.
And you have your perch in the water.
I stick to my perch and your perch sticks to you.
Could you sing him the nursery-song you once told me of?
I suggested.
Dearest, a sweeter, sadder song I'll sing to thee to-morrow.
I thanked her, but I could not say That I was glad to hear it: I left the house at break of day.
Don't you think that, in your picture of another life, you are in fact transplanting that child into political life, without making any allowance for his growing up?
I think I understand you,said the Earl.
It tastes just like real spinach!
I thought it was an imitation—but I do believe it's real!
he whispered anxiously.
I will now recite the other Introductory Verses,said the Other Professor.
''What reward shall I give unto the Lordy' the tremulous lips were saying, /or all the benefits that He hath done unto me?
I will receive the cup of salvation, and call—and call—but here the poor weakened memory failed, and the feeble voice died into silence.
''Please tell about Bruno's Picnic; and don't talk about nubbly Lions!
I won't, if it frightens you,said Sylvie.
The room's very hot, with all this crowd,the Professor said to Sylvie.
I wonder why they don't put some lumps of ice in the grate?
> Most religious believers would now agree with Bishop Butler,said I, and not reject a line of argument, even if it led straight to the conclusion that animals have some kind of soul, which survives their bodily death.
I would like to know that to be tiue!
Sister, do not raise my wrath.
I'd make you into mutton broth As easily as kill a moth!
I had put it on by mistake.
I'd quite forgotten I had one on, already.
An' while I smokes my pipe, she sits an' talks to me — as loving an' as pleasant!
I'll be bound I thowt it were Minnie come again!
the Professor briskly replied.
I'll come and settle that, soon.
You can leave their things here, Wilson.
I'll dress them, when they're ready to go.
May I stroke it, please?
I'll touch it welly gently!
You needn't be afraid of me!
I'm a very gentle old Lion now.
And there was a lesson to be learned from it.
I'm afraid I forget that^ too.
Wait till you hear it,said the Professor: then you'll see.
I'm not sure it hasn't some in the middle^ as well.
He's quite sure to get rest and quiet, here : and, as for the nursing, why, I think it's just possible—(he tried hard to make his trembling voice assume a playful tone) he LIFE OUT OF DEATH 747 may even get fairly well nursed, in his present quarters!
I'm sure of it!
Tears of an ever-ready sympathy glittered in Bruno's eyes.
I's welly sorry he isn't the Pope!
Theatricals in our quiet town!
I've always said, The law should put them down,They mean no harm, tho' I begin to doubt it — But now sit down and tell me all about it.
Less noise there, if you please!
I've caught a cold,the Thing replies, Out there upon the landing.
And the old Fox were saying,Sylvie went on, for once conceding the grammatical point, 'Yes, my dear, you'll be ever so happy with us, if you'll only come and see us!
I've got three little Foxes there, and we do love little Lambs so dearly!
I'll *set' you part of the way,said Lady Muriel.
I've had no walk to-day.
Ma!
I've learnt all my lessons!
When the Other Professor had recited this Verse, he went across to the fire-place, and put his head up the chimney.
In doing this, he lost his balance, and fell headfirst into the empty grate, and got so firmly fixed there that it was some time before he could be dragged out again.
A small saucer of chopped carrots,replied the Pro- 740 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED fessor.
In giving birthday-presents, my motto is—cheapness!
I thought you'd like to know that —that I'm not—not in the mind I was in when last we met.
It isn't—that I can accept Christian belief—at least, not yet.
This kind of box then is not so rare; The lids are the eyelids, the locks are the hair, And so every schoolboy can tell to his cost, The key to the tangles is constantly lost.
IV 'Twixt Perhapsand May beLittle difference we see: 822 VERSE Let the question go round, The answer is found.
Yet caused two lids to open wide : And all these locks had never a key — What kind of a box, then, could it be?
IV What is most like a bee in May?
They gave her one, they gave me two, They gave us three or more; They all returned from him to you, Though they were mine before.
If I or she should chance to be Involved in this affair.
And when the hour arrives, be thercy Where'er that theremay be; Uncleanly hands or ruffled hair Let no one ever see.
If dinner at half-pastbe placed, At half-pastthen be dressed.
That were very rude,said Bruno.
If he couldn't speak, he might have nodded—no, he couldn't nod.
cried Bruno.
If he kept all his promises,Sylvie said, with a mischievous look in her eyes, he wasn't like some Boys I know of!
cried the Bellman in haste.
If it once becomes dark, there's no chance of a Snark — We have hardly a minute to waste!
Lady Muriel exclaimed.
If only for the sake of the poor horses.
' She called me her 'Neddy,' (Tho' there mayn't be much in it,) And I should have been ready.
If she'd waited a minute; I was following behind her When, if you recollect, I Merely ran back to find a Gold pin for my neck-tie.
In lodgings by the Sea.
If you Hke your coffee with sand for dregs, A decided hint of salt in your tea.
Believe in fairies.
If you are able, Don't have a stable With any mangers.
The momentary impulse was so strong to tell her of my experiences in this very wood, that I had to make a real effort to keep back the words that rushed to my lips.
If you mean, by ^believe,' 'believe in their possible existence,' I say *Yes.
We should all of us grieve, as you well may believe.
If you never were met with again — But surely, my man, when the voyage began.
imperfect is expression,Some poet said, I don't care who.
If you want to know you must go elsewhere.
Shews his true aflfection.
If you'd prove your Simon's love follow my direction.
i EARLY VERSE MY FAIRY (1845) I HAVE a fairy by my side Which says I must not sleep, When once in pain I loudly cried It said You must not weep.
If, full of mirth, I smile and grin.
How would you like to have to carry your walkingstick in your mouth?
Ignoring the difficult question as to the raison d'etre of a walking-stick, supposing one had no hands^ I mentioned a curious instance, I had once witnessed, of reasoning by a dog.
II In Shylock's bargain for the flesh was found No mention of the blood that flowed around : So when the stick was sawed in eight, The sawdust lost diminished from the weight.
Ill As curly-headed Jemmy was sleeping in bed, His brother John gave him a blow on the head; James opened his eyelids, and spying his brother, Doubled his fist, and gave him another.
May have remarked a Spectre who Was doing all that Ghosts can do To welcome the new-comer.
In Villas this is always done — However cheaply rented: For, though of course there's less of fun When there is only room for one, Ghosts have to be contented.
And his overbearing sisters Called him names he disapproved of: Called him Johnny, Daddy's Darling,Called him Jacky, Scrubby School-boy,' And, so awful was the picture.
In comparison the others Seemed, to one's bewildered fancy.
For / have friends who dwell by the coast — Pleasant friends they are to me!
It is when I am with them I wonder most That anyone likes the Sea.
With many a puff and pant: Who still, as rises the ascent.
In language grows more violent, Although in breath more scant: 848 VERSE Who, climbing, gains at length the place That crowns the upward track : And, entering with unsteady pace, Receives a buffet in the face That lands him on his back: And feels himself,
If I had but the time and you had but the brain — But much yet remains to be said.
In one moment I've seen what has hitherto been Enveloped in absolute mystery.
But if you find him with his friends, The thing is rather harder.
In such a case success depends On picking up some candle-ends, Or butter, in the larder.
By which they could tell that they stood on the ground Where the Baker had met with the Snark.
In the midst of the word he was trying to say.
said the Emperor, rubbing his eyes.
In the next Province, I fancy,the Professor rephed.
At length the curtain rose upon Bombastes Furioso.
In vain we roared; in vain we tried To rouse her into laughter: Her pensive glances wandered wide From orchestra to rafter — ^'Tier upon tierT she said, and sighed; And silence followed after.
I cried.
Instead Of answering my question, Well, if you don't know that^' he said, Either you never go to bed.
But the Butcher turned nervous, and dressed himself fine, With yellow kid gloves and a ruff — Said he felt it exactly like going to dine, Which the Bellman declared was all stuff.
Introduce me, now there's a good fellow,he said, If we happen to meet it together!
Sylvie stopped suddenly.
Is that all?
Oh, that's quite another thing,he said.
It are ever so many other things,said Bruno.
said Bruno.
It begins miserably, and it ends miserablier.
And he said 'No!
It cant be the Carpenter a-mending my Wheelbarrow, because I haven't got a Wheelbarrow!
The song ceased just as they came into sight: but, to my delight, Bruno instantly said Let's sing it all again, Sylvie!
It did sound so pretty!
I tooked the saucer up 'cause it were so discontented!
It doesn't look so to m^,said the Lord Chancellor.
The Beaver had counted with scrupulous care, Attending to every word : But it fairly lost heart, and outgrabe in despair, When the third repetition occurred.
It felt that, in spite of all possible pains.
The Professor chuckled in delight.
It had a sensible effect.
And he wept with delight in attempting to say He considered the Beaver his friend : While the Beaver confessed, with affectionate looks More eloquent even than tears.
It had learned in ten minutes far more than all books Would have taught it in seventy years.
Recollecting with tears how, in earlier years.
It had taken no pains with its sums.
The Other Professor is to recite a Tale of a Pig—I mean a Pig-Tale,he corrected himself.
It has Introductory Verses at the beginning, and at the end.
The twenty-three patients consist of nine men, six women, and eight children.
It has not been found possible to identify them all, as some of the children—left with no surviving relatives—are infants: and two men and one woman are not yet able to maJ^e rational replies, the brain-powers being entirely in abeyance.
said Lady Muriel: and she ran upstairs to fetch it.
It has nothing written in it but 'Muriel,' she said as she returned with it: shall I inscribe— No, my own one,said Arthur, taking it from her.
Yes—that's the one,the Professor rather reluctantly admitted.
It has taken a goodish time to prepare.
I asked him, as soon as we were far enough from the house for me to speak in ordinary tones.
It is Lifer he replied with eager emphasis.
My brother, tell to me?
It is but the fantailed pigeon.
Dear brother, tell to me?
It is my younger brother,he cried, Oh woe and dole is me!
Sometimes I've thought that, if anything could make me cease to believe in a God of perfect justice, it would be the sufferings of horses—without guilt to deserve it, and without any compensation!
It is only part of the great Riddle,said the Earl, why innocent beings ever suflfer.
Yes, but I delayed writing.
It is so hard to say—on | paper— I know.
When I think of my uncle's last words : And my heart is like nothing so much as a bowl Brimming over with quivering curds!
It is this, it is this—We have had that before!
The Empress inspected it solemnly with her eye-glass.
It is very small,she said in a deep voice.
The next Specimen, at any rate, will not fly away!
It is—in short, or perhaps, more THE PROFESSOR S LECTURE 709 correctly, at length—an Elephant, You will observe— Here he beckoned to the Gardener to come up on the platform, and with his help began putting together what looked like an enormous dog-kenne
It were very silly indeed.
It jingled my elbows, and it banged my back, and it crinkled my hair, and it buzzed among my bones!
Sir, dont talk about eating Lambs!
It makes me so I THE LITTLE FOXES 653 shiveryl' And the Lion said 'Oh, well, we won't talk about it, then!
' And Bruno said 'Oh, if you please, Sir, dont talk about eating little boys!
It makes me so shivery!
Sylvie nodded.
It means 'to munch' and 'to like to munch.
And when the Lamb had been gone a long time, the Lion said to Bruno 'Do go and see after that silly little Lamb!
It must have lost its way.
'' he exclaimed.
It never does,THE BANQUET 719 he added, aside to Bruno, to be anybody else, does it?
You needn't be afraid of Ms Lion!
It never kills things!
Bruno put in.
It ran away.
' It said 'Wiflful—' sumfinoruvver.
It said *And 00 may live to say *How much I wiss I had the Mouse that then I frew away!
It 'splained all that to me, while it were drinking the milk.
It said *I teaches the Mouses new games: the Mouses likes it ever so much.
His wife knelt down at the bedside, raised one of his arms, and drew it across her own, fondly kissing the thin white hand that lay so listlessly in her loving grasp.
It seemed to me a good opportunity for stealing away without making her go through any form of parting: so, nodding to the Earl and Eric, I silently left the room.
f^Sylvie stopped, and listened anxiously.
It sounded like some one kicking at a door.
You're not to whisper, Bruno!
It spoils the story!
That not even the rapture of hunting the Snark Could atone for that dismal surprise!
It strongly advised that the Butcher should be Conveyed in a separate ship: But the Bellman declared that would never agree With the plans he had made for the trip: Navigation was always a difficult art.
Try it yourself, my little dear!
It took me something like a year, With constant practising.
No,said Bruno.
It was a betterer reason.
he whispered.
It was a noble offer, but I wouldn't rob him of the treat.
No doubt,she replied, with that pretty mock-gravity that became her so well: but, on Man's side, the chief advantage seems to me to consist in having poc\ets!
It was borne in upon me—upon us^ I should say; for my father and I were returning from a walk—only yesterday.
I won't if you'd rather I didn't,said the kind-hearted Professor.
It was only something about a Ship's Buoy: a harmless pun—but it doesn't matter.
resounded along the platform.
It was sad to return to the place, and to feel that I should never again see the glad smile of welcome, that had awaited me here so few months ago.
And he set off to have a Picnic, on the top of the hill, all by himself— He wasn't greedy, 00 know, to have it all by himself,Bruno said, patting me on the cheek to call my attention; 'cause he hadn't got no brothers and sisters.
It was very sad to have no sisters^ wasn't it?
It might be an Axledum,Bruno said: but it wouldn't be truer Ignorance of Axioms,the Lecturer continued, is a great drawback in life.
It wastes so much time to have to say them over and over again.
Sylvie asked, as he returned to his place.
It were a Mouse,said Bruno.
I saw nuffinr Bruno sadly replied.
It were too dark!
''That wasn't a riddle!
It wereT Bruno fiercely replied.
Oo may call him Bruno, if 00 like,the little fellow carelessly remarked.
It weren't me^ but it makes it more interesting.
I will now explain the Process of—the name is blotted, I'm sorry to say.
It will be illustrated by a number of — of—here he examined the page for some time, and at last said It seems to be either 'Experiments' or 'Specimens — Let it be Experiments'' said the Emperor.
Should you happen to venture on one.
It will sigh like a thing that is deeply distressed: And it always looks grave at a pun.
And she took another spoonful.
It wo'n't be real much longer,said Bruno.
Why wasn't it made of gold, I should like to know?
It would have taken a very long—the Professor began, but the Emperor cut the sentence short.
cried the kind-hearted Professor, as he helped him up.
It wouldn't be me, if I didn't trip,said the Other Professor.
she asked the Professor.
It wouldn't make the Pope any happier,said the Professor.
Sylvie briskly replied.
It'll be done in a moment!
We must take you to stay at the seaside,Syivie said, THE BEGGAR S RETURN 74I tenderly.
It'll do you ever so much good!
Bruno explained.
It's quite the nicest part—what's coming now!
Tell them not to begin, on any account, till I come!
It's really wonderfuly' he said, turning to the children, the success I've had in curing Diseases!
(turns away from him and clasps her hands, looking up ecstatically) I'm sure of this!
It's something quite uncommon!
If you j want to see a man, offer him something to eat.
It's the same rule with a mouse.
Hot as it was, Sylvie shivered a little at the idea.
It's very cold outside^' she said.
Sylvie said, heartily.
It's very extremely interesting.
And Sylvie replied Very well.
It's you to begin, you know.
The sun is setting/' said Lady Muriel, rising and leading the way to the open window.
Just look at the western sky!
(turns to audience) You'll praise them, won't you, when youVe seen the play ?
Just say *HOW NICE!
I have said it twice: That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark!
the Bellman cried, As he landed his crew with care; Supporting each man on the top o£ the tide By a finger entwined in his hair.
Just the place for a Snark!
'Tis the note of the Jubjub!
Keep count, I entreat.
There stands the Inspector at thy door: Like a dog, he hunts for boys who know not two and two are four.
Kind hearts are more than coronets,She said, and wondering looked at me: *It is the dead unhappy night, and I must hurry home to tea.
But my feelings were those of fear rather than of hope : though, on entering the house, I was somewhat reassured by finding luggage lying in the entrance, bearing the initials E.
L.
Here he rose to his feet, and there was an instant silence THE PIG-TALE 725 through the Banqueting-Hall : they evidently expected a speech.
Ladies, and gentlemen,the Professor began, the Other Professor is so kind as to recite a Poem.
Special pleading, special pleading!
Lady Muriel cried, in a most unfilial tone of triumph.
'' Surely, surely!
Lady Muriel exclaimed in a tone of relief, losoking at her father with sparkling eyes.
The bewildered singer searched through the heap of music lying on an adjoining table, but it was not there, either.
Lady Muriel helped in the search: others soon joined: the excitement grew.
Died three hours ago.
Lady Muriel shuddered, and hid her face in her hands : but at this moment the front-door was quietly closed, and we heard no more.
An uncomfortable silence followed this announcement.
Lady Muriel ventured no further conjectures, but quietly examined the fastenings of the windows, which opened as doors.
I pressed his hand, and left him.
Lady Muriel,I said 7l8 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED softly to myself as I went homewards, truly you know how to 'mak' amends'!
So in turn the other sisters.
Last, the youngest son was taken: Very rough and thick his hair was, Very round and red his face was.
Here he turned to the crowd and addressed them in a loud voice.
Learn your A's!
Oh would I were back at Twyford school.
Learning lessons in fear of the birch!
cried the delighted Professor.
Let THE BANQUET 715 US return to the platform, and proceed to the Fourth Experiment!
That statute is obsolete quite!
Let me tell you, my friends, the whole question depends On an ancient manorial right.
*'Avengement^' they cry, *'on our Foelet!
Let the Manikin weep for our wrongs!
The Empress rose in an agony of alarm.
Let us go to him!
So wonderful—so entirely super-human—said the Earl, and so entirely inconsistent with the intelligence they show in other ways—that I feel no doubt at all that it is pure Instinct, and not^ as some hold, a very high order of Reason.
Look at the utter stupidity of a bee, trying to find its way out of an open window!
But what then?
Look on, a few years, into a life where disease has no existence.
Hiawatha, when she asked him, Took no notice of the question.
Looked as if he hadn't heard it; But, when pointedly appealed to, Smiled in his peculiar manner, Coughed and said it didn't matter,Bit his lip and changed the subject.
To be sure that all's well.
Looks into the straw To see there's no flaw.
Don't push with your shoulder Until you are older.
Lose not a button.
he murmured to himseif.
Loveless, loveless!
groaned the Professor.
Lumbago — rheumatism—that sort of thing.
' 'Oh yes.
Ma!
I'm sure that something is the matter, All day there's been—oh, such a fuss and clatter!
Mamma's been trying on a funny dress — I never saw the house in such a mess!
To see that he's properly dressed.
Many words brought the wind of crueland kind,And that man suffers more than the brute: Each several word with patience he heard.
Always, in this wood,she began after a pause (silence seemed natural in this dim solitude), I begin thinking of Fairies!
May I ask you a question?
How do we know that any material connection is necessary?
May not mere neighbourhood be enough ?
That is what he is, no doubt!
May we go and see him?
Bruno slipped off his chair in a moment.
May we go too?
And this assertion Sylvie did not venture to contradict.
Meanwhile a chair had been placed for the Other Professor, between the Empress and Sylvie.
were the next words that reached my ear, but certainly not in the voice either of Sylvie or of Bruno, whom I could just see, through the crowd of guests, standing by the piano, and listening to the Count's song.
Mein Herr was the speaker.
I have imagined a 668 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED little child, playing with toys on his nursery-floor, and yet able to reason^ and to look on, thirty years ahead.
Might he not say to himself 'By that time I shall have had enough of bricks and ninepins.
What is your discovery 666 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED worth, tJien?
Milton makes Jove promise too much.
) Miss V, And then, my dear.
Miss Asterisk and he Pretended they were lovers!
Miss Crabb, and I may truly say You showed your wisdom when you stayed away.
Miss C, Doubtless!
!
Miss C.
Miss V, Well then, Miss Crabb, I won't deceive you, dear; I heard some things I didn't like to hear: Miss C, But don't omit them now.
Miss V.
Oo may say it, this time.
Mister Sir!
Than e'er to be behind; To ope the door while strikes the chime, That shows a punctual mind.
Moral Let punctuality and care Seize every flitting hour.
Be rude to strangers.
Moral: Behave.
No!
Moral: Never stew your sister.
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 767 '' Tis a pitiful tale,said the Bellman, whose face Had grown longer at every word : But, now that youVe stated the whole of your case.
More debate would be simply absurd.
Yet mar\ those trees, two miles away, All clustered in a clump: If you could trot there twice a day.
Nor ever pause for rest or play.
I really don't know what would happen if you did them!
Nor nobody doosn't know what'll happen if 00 doos them!
Amidst my moanings deep, I heard a voice, Wake!
Mr.
He came in, and stood before Lady Muriel, resting one hand heavily on the table, and with a strange look in his eyes, as if he were walking in his sleep.
Muriel—my love—he paused, and his lips quivered : but after a minute he went on more steadily.
she pleaded, rising and laying her hands on his shoulders, and looking up into his face with her great eyes brimming over with tears.
Must you go, Arthur?
I do not fear my Simon dear will fail to come at last, Although I know that long ago the time I named is past.
My Simon!
But that is just what I dont know,the Other Professor rejoined.
My belief is, it plays with them to }{ill them!
And did not venture near it Till time, I hoped, had worn away Her grief, for nought could cheer it!
My dismal sister!
My fee shall be a mutton-chop.
My goal this ruined Pump.
I have often longed to meet an angel,she whispered, so low that I could hardly catch the words* I'm so glad I've seen Sylvie!
My heart went out to the child the first moment that I saw her— Listen!
said Syivie anxiously.
My old enemy!
they cried.
Never mind about Specimens, Professor!
' And Bruno said 'No, indeed I wo'n't!
New Milk's so nice and so warm, it wants no boiling!
And the picture failed completely.
Next the Son, the Stunning-Cantab: He suggested curves of beauty, Curves pervading all his figure.
''He,'' indicating Eric, who stood near, saved my life — He brought me back.
Next to God, we must thank him, Muriel, my wife!
A written record was found in their house, of the dates of their deaths.
Next to theirs we will place the honoured name of Dr.
Spoons in their hands!
No breakfast!
And so it fell upon a day, (That is, it never rose again) A chick was found upon the hay, Its little life had ebbed away.
No longer frolicsome and gay.
But he never thin\s.
No one would suffer ^ from cold, if only they would thinJ{ of those little things.
Allow me to remark That Ghosts have just as good a right, In every way, to fear the light, As Men to fear the dark.
No plea,said I, can well excuse Such cowardice in you: For Ghosts can visit when they choose, Whereas we Humans can't refuse To grant the interview.
Arthur Forester, who, on the death of the local physician, nobly faced the imminent peril of death, rather than leave these poor fol\ uncared for in their last extremity.
No record A NEWSPAPER-CUTTING 68l of his name, or of the date of his death, was found: but the corpse was easily identified, although dressed in the ordinary fisherman s suit {which he was \nown to have adopted when he went down there), by a copy of the N
And the tolling of a distant bell seemed to answer me, No!
No!
Well!
No!
So he staid black!
No, he didn't stay black!
Did you ever ask yourself the question,Lady Muriel began, a propos of nothing, what is the chief advantage of being a Man instead of a Dog?
No, indeed,I said: but I think there are advantages on the Dogs side of the question as well.
'Pre-occupied,' you mean.
No, it's porcupine,'' persisted Sylvie.
Shall I repeat the Experiment?
No, no!
^said Bruno.
No, no!
And let the Lesson be *to try again'!
No,' 'said Bruno with great decision.
Have you been to see my father?
No,I said: I was on my way there, and came through here as the shortest way.
Oo wasn't there to see.
Nobody ca'n't go among my bones.
he pleaded, half-sobbing.
Nonsense, Bruno!
And, though I reproached myself, bitterly, for the unworthy suspicion I had for one moment harboured against the true-hearted Lady Muriel, I took comfort in knowing it had been but a passing thought.
Not Bruno himself could have mounted the stairs with so buoyant a step, as I felt my way up in the dark, not pausing to strike a light in the entry, as I knew I had left the lamp burning in my sitting-room.
There was silence supreme!
Not a shriek, not a scream.
They must have run out, while we were wrapped up in the song,Lady Muriel said, addressing herself to the Count, who seemed more agitated than the others; and no doubt they've found their way back to the housekeeper's room.
Not by this door!
Still you have the advantage of me in many ways, dear boy!
Not only that your day is dawning while Tnine is setting, but your interest in Life—somehow I ca'n't help envying you that.
'' I asked, despondingly.
Not quite all,Sylvie slily replied.
They all proved to be well fastened, inside.
Not yet at the end of her resources, Lady Muriel rang the bell.
Observe with what an airy flop I plant myself upon the top!
Now bend your \nees and ta\e a hop.
I have gone through it all, more than once.
Now let me tell you how I have put it to myself.
It will need time^ I'm afraid: but that is a trifling disadvantage.
Now observe.
Make up your mind that you will say both words, but leave it unsettled which you will say first.
Now open your mouth and speak.
For me to annoy it was ever his joy.
Now ril teach him the meaning of Tees'!
You're getting as familiar As if you were my cousin!
Now that's a thing / will not stand, And so I tell you flat.
For this concluding Experiment, I will take a certain Alkali, or Acid—I forget which.
Now you'll see what will happen when I mix it with Some—here he took up a bottle, and looked at it doubtfully, —when I mix it with—with Something— Here the Emperor interrupted.
O broken heart!
O broken limb!
the jam without the jars.
Observe the beauty of this rhyme.
I answered in a passion.
Of course it worries you a bit To come so far on foot — But how was / to blame for it?
Then it put down the umbrella and began with the parasol.
Of course that didn't open its jaws nearly so wide, and it was able to get a good hold of the umbrella, and galloped off in triumph.
Bruno enquired.
Of course!
I The day was wet, the rain fell souse Like jars of strawberry jam/ a Sound was heard in the old henhouse, A beating of a hammer.
Of stalwart form, and visage warm, Two youths were seen within it, Splitting up an old tree into perches for their poultry At a hundred strokes ^ a minute.
''Oh rouse,I urged, the waning sense With tales of tangled evidence.
Of suit, demurrer, and defence.
The sister raised her beaming eye And looked on him indignantly And sternly answered, Only try!
Off to the cook he quickly ran.
Did you ever go through a table, for instance?
Often!
We are really extremely alike ; I've a turn-pike up here, and I very much fear You may soon have a turn with a pike.
Oh grant but one wish!
And ran it right into his brother.
Oh much is the noise that is made among boys When playfully pelting a pig, But a far greater pother was made by his brother When flung from the top of the brigg.
For when I am with my Simon Smith—oh, that common name!
Oh that vulgar name!
But a pigeon-cote is a different thing To the coat that there I see!
Oh what bait's that upon your hook.
But when she saw that sight of awe, The tear stood in her e'e.
Oh what bait's that upon your hook.
my landlady asked timidly.
Oh yes, come in!
said Bruno.
Oh yes, it grew up in a minute.
My sister'U be the contents!
Oh!
So he opened the door—said Bruno.
Oh, Bruno!
cried Bruno.
Oh, BrunoT said Sylvie in a warning whisper.
At this rate, we sha'n't get to the Experiments till to-morrow-week!
Oh, sooner than that, I assure you!
Vanished that dim and ghostly bed, (The hangings, tape; the tape was red:) 'Tis o'er, and Doe and Roe are dead!
Oh, yet my spirit inly crawls, What time it shudderingly recalls That horrid dream of marble halls!
In the kitchen—Oh, you desperate villain!
Oh, you treacherous thief!
' —if a little fat juicy Boy came by, why, I used to spring out and gobble him up!
Oh, you've no idea what a delicious thing it is—a little juicy Boy!
When thou, my charmer^ art away— Old Bric\^ or rather^ let me say.
Old Parallelepiped!
Now to commence my argument, I shall premise an observation.
On which the greatest kings have leant When striving to subdue a nation, And e'en the wretch who pays no rent By it can solve a hard equation.
With this you make a kind of slide (It answers best with suet).
On which you must contrive to glide, And swing yourself from side to side — One soon learns how to do it.
The Professor began fluently enough.
Once a coincidence was taking a walk with a little accident, and they met an explanation—a very old explanation—so old that it was quite doubled up, and looked more like a conundrum—he broke of?
Bruno was only too happy to adopt the suggestion.
Once there were a Pig, and a Accordion, and two jars of Orange-marmalade— The dramatis persona^''' murmured the Professor.
The Lesson are 'not to try again'!
Once there were a lovely china man, what stood on the chimbley-piece.
And last, a Leprechaun.
One day, some Spectres chanced to call, Dressed in the usual white: I stood and watched them in the hall.
When you're older,said the Professor, you'll know that you cant put Mountains together again so easily!
One lives and one learns, you know!
Why wasn't it a throne?
One might excuse the other omissions, but I cant get over the chair!
The humbugs of the social sphere.
One showed a vain and noisy prig, That shouted empty words and big At him that nodded in a wig.
Me!
One that has hardly got the wits to be a shoeblack!
The bell to summon me away; They're anxious to begin their little Play.
One word before I go—We'll do our best, And crave your kind indulgence for the rest; Own that at least we've striven to succeed, And take the good intention for the deed.
Next to him the eldest daughter: She suggested very little.
Only asked if he would take her With her look of passive beauty.
(I put my handkerchief to my eyes, and Bruno hastily climbed upon my knee and stroked my face.
Only one more whipping.
At last, when, breath and patience spent, I had recourse to smoking — Your ^/m,he said, is excellent: But—when you call it argument— Of course you're only joking?
PHANTASMAGORIA 847 Stung by his cold and snaky eye, I roused myself at length To say, At least I do defy The veriest sceptic to deny That union is strength!
My phantom-life was soon begun: When I was barely six, I went out with an older one — And just at first I thought it fun, And learned a lot of tricks.
PHANTASMAGORIA 84I I've haunted dungeons, casdes, towers — Wherever I was sent : Tve often sat and howled for hours, Drenched to the skin with driving showers, Upon a battlement.
'' ft Instead of singing Verse the Third, I ceased—abruptly, rather : But, after such a splendid word I felt that it would be absurd To try it any farther.
PHANTASMAGORIA 853 So with a yawn I went my way To seek the welcome downy, And slept, and dreamed till break of day Of Poltergeist and Fetch and Fay And Leprechaun and Brownie!
There is an insect that people avoid (Whence is derived the verb to flee).
PHANTASMAGORIA 855 Where have you been by it most annoyed?
Hurriedly he packed his boxes: Hurriedly the porter trundled On a barrow all his boxes : Hurriedly he took his ticket: Hurriedly the train received him: Thus departed Hiawatha.
PHANTASMAGORIA 86l MELANCHOLETTA With saddest music all day long She soothed her secret sorrow: At night she sighed I fear 'twas wrong Such cheerful words to borrow.
''The Third was written to protect The interests of the Victim, And tells us, as I recollect, To treat him with a grave respect, And not to contradict himT That's plain,said I, as Tare and Tret, To any comprehension: I only wish some Ghosts I've met
Perhaps,he said, '''you first transgressed The laws of hospitality : All Ghosts instinctively detest The Man that fails to treat his guest With proper cordiality.
THE PIG-TALE 727 There was a Frog that wandered by— A slee\ and shining lump: Inspected him with fishy eye, And said O.
Pig, what maJ{es you cry?
The note contained five words only.
Please come at once.
The Gardener will now bring in the next Specimen.
Please open both curtains, down at the end there, and make way for the Elephant!
This Cat's very kind to the Mouses,Bruno said, stooping to stroke a remarkably fat specimen of the race, that had just waddled into the room, and was rubbing itself affectionately against the leg of his chair.
Please, Sylvie, pour some milk in your saucer.
And he looked to Sylvie for assistance.
Porcupine,said Sylvie.
854 VERSE A SEA DIRGE There are certain things—as, a spider, a ghost, The income-tax, gout, an umbrella for three — That I hate, but the thing that I hate the most Is a thing they call the Sea.
Pour some salt water over the floor — Ugly I'm sure you'll allow it to be: Suppose it extended a mile or more, That's very like the Sea.
If I'm not wearying you, I would like to tell you an idea of the future Life which has haunted me for years, like a sort of waking nightmare—I ca'n't reason myself out of it.
Pray do,Arthur and I replied, almost in a breath.
exclaimed the delighted Professor.
Pray let me go in.
They seem too proud,said I, to go To houses such as mine.
Pray, how did they contrive to know So quickly that *the place was low,' And that I 'kept bad wine'?
Cooks need not be indulged in waste j Yet still you'd better teach them Dishes should have some sort of taste.
Pray, why are all the cruets placed Where nobody can reach them?
Some spinach, you know.
Professor, as a surprise.
Good night.
Professor, good night!
And how are you now.
Professor?
The Beaver, who happened to hear the remark.
Protested, with tears in its eyes.
It didn't sound a likely sort of thing for anyone to have about him; however, they brought him one directly: curiously enough, there happened to be one standing in the gallery.
Put it facing the opening of the door, and draw up the portcullis!
It was that sweet little boy, who found it for me,the Count suggested.
Quite perhaps he is the thief?
Unconscious where I was.
Quoth he That's regular clap-trap: Don't bluster anv more.
Salmon, go down!
Salmon, come twist your tail around!
And now—would anyone like to get under the blankets and see itr Dead silence followed this appeal: but at last Bruno said 77/ get under, if it won't jingle my elbows.
Satisfied on this point, Bruno crawled under the blankets, and, after a minute or two, crawled out again, very hot and dusty, and with his hair in the wildest confusion.
Then he might go to curves of the third degree.
Say that took ten times as long (you see we have unlimited time to deal with).
The din of voice, the words both loud and many, The sob, the tear, the sigh that none could smother, Till all agreed a shilling to a penny It killed itself, and we acquit the mother!
Scarce was the verdict spoken.
The Moon, in social matters interfering.
Scolded the Sun, when early in appearing; And the rude Sun, her gentle sex ignoring.
And, in the silence that followed, the final stanza of Tottlesrang through the room.
See now this couple settled down In quiet lodgings, out of town: BEYOND THESE VOICES 66l Submissively the tearful wife Accepts a plain and humble life: Yet begs one boon on bended \nee: My duef{y'darling, don't resent it!
And the old man, attended by his children, headed the procession down stairs.
See the fate of a loveless life!
And natural ingenuity.
Shakspeare I think it is who treats Of Ghosts, in days of old.
PROLOGUES TO PLAYS PROLOGUE TO ^'LA GUIDA DI BRAGIA(From an opera written for Carroll's Marionette Theatre) Shall soldiers tread the murderous path of war, Without a notion \yhat they do it for ?
Shall pallid mercers drive a roaring trade, And sell the stufis their hands have never made ?
''When the Duc\let's dar\ doom is decided, We will trundle him home in a trice: And the banquet, so plainly provided.
Shall round into rose-buds and rice: In a blaze of pragmatic invention He shall wrestle with Fate, and shall reign: But he has not a friend fit to mention.
It will do me good, and I have more to say to you.
Shall we go through the wood?
Next, his better half took courage; She would tiave her picture taken.
She came dressed beyond description.
It was a pretty sight to see—the motherly way in which the fairy-child gathered up her little brother in her arms, and laid him on a stronger leaf.
She gave it just a touch to set it rocking, and it went on vigorously by itself, as if it 670 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED contained some hidden machinery.
Still clinging to him, she laid her head softly on his breast.
She had never done such a thing in my presence before, and I knew how deeply she must be moved.
5) Ees,he answered slowly.
She has na forgotten me.
Sylvie smiled.
She liked having an appreciative audience.
' And Bruno said Tlease—' Is an Oven *Sir' or ' 'm,' would you say?
She looked to me for a reply.
I asked Sylvie.
She only smiled sweetly and shook her head.
5> You're a Full Moon,said he.
She replied with a frown, Well!
Awhile I let her tears flow on.
She said they soothed her woe so!
I shall never rest happy till he's changed that name, but when he has married me, maybe he'll love me to that degree, that he'll grant me my prayer And will call himself Clare— So she talked all alone, as she sat upon a stone.
Still hoping he would come and find her, and she started most unkimmon, when instead of darling Simmon'twas a strange man that stood behind her.
All the while that she was sitting.
Still the lady chattered, chattered.
They have passed out of our lives!
She sighed again; and no more was said, till we came out into the main road, at a point near my lodgings.
I stood in the very room where—where— .
She struggled in vain to go on.
greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
She threw back her veil on seeing me approach, and came forwards to meet me, with a quiet smile, and far more self-possessed than I could have expected.
Do you think I'd et/er lose it or forget it?
She undid the ribbon round her neck, as she spoke, and laid the Jewel in her father's hand.
She died, a matter of two months ago—or it may be three.
She was a bonny lass—and a good lass, too.
Yet it were rash to tear my hair; Disfigured, I should be less fair.
She was unwise, I may say blind; Once she was lovingly inclined; Some circumstance has changed her mind.
Ah!
She's been here many a time, sin' then.
cried the Bellman in wrath, as he heard The Butcher beginning to sob.
Should we meet with a Jubjub, that desperate bird.
They flutter above and below.
Shrill shrie\ings of lubberly laughter.
Take care o£ a candle.
Shut a door by the handle.
Or vie with Mrs.
Siddons in the art To rouse the feelings and to charm the heart?
Would have caused quite a thrill in Society), 77^ VERSE As to temper the Jubjub's a desperate bird.
Since it lives in perpetual passion: Its taste in costume is entirely absurd — It is ages ahead of the fashion : But it knows any friend it has met once before: It never will look at a bribe : And in charity-meetings it stands at the door, And collects—t
He had not been dead many hours when the exploring party came upon the body, which was identified, beyond the possibility of doubt, by the dress, and by the crucifix which was, li\e the young Doctor s Testament, clasped closely to his heart.
Since reaching the hospital, two of the men and one of the children have died.
But all this time Bruno was getting sleepier and sleepier.
Sing, sing!
Sir, I will.
Sir!
No bad news.
Sir, I hope?
' Minnie was my grand-daughter.
Sir, as lived wi' me.
She took her little porringer : Of me she shall not win renown : For the baseness of its nature shall have strength to drag her down.
Sisters and brothers, little Maid?
Don't enter the water Till to swim you are able.
Sit close to the table.
The little Foxes said nothing.
So Bruno put the Apples into the hamper—and the 656 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED little Foxes—and the Bread—(They had picnicked all the Milk,Bruno explained in a whisper) —and he set off to go to his house.
I wiss 00 wouldn't say it so short!
So Bruno put the Bread in the hamper.
' It doesn't want no boiling,Bruno offered as an amended version.
So Bruno put the Milk in a bottle.
Sylvie adopted the suggestion instantly.
So Bruno said Tlease, Sirm, I want it for my Picnic' And the Oven said 'O!
Tell the rest!
So Bruno said ^Eldest little Fox, have you been eating yourself, you wicked little Fox?
' This time I hid my face in my hands, quite unable to meet Bruno's look of triumph.
So Bruno went a little further along the road.
Such a being, without free will, would be an absurdity.
So I am driven to the conclusion that they are capable of sin.
] I met an aged, aged man Upon the lonely moor: I knew I was a gentleman, And he was but a boor.
So I stopped and roughly questioned him, Come, tell me how you live!
He hasn't been into society yet, And his manners are not of the best.
So I think it quite fair that it should be my care.
Sylvie exclaimed, ''you're not telling the story!
So he opened the door, and behold, there were no Apples!
Thump!
So he thought he'd look round, this time, just to see what it was.
' It must be a singular animal!
So it are^'' said Bruno, after carefully examining the Cat, to make sure how many there were of it.
All good little Boys—(Sylvie turned away from Bruno, and made a great pretence of whispering to me) —all good little Boys—Boys that learn their lessons quite perfect—they always keep their birthdays, you know.
So of course this little Boy kept his Birthday.
For man is a creature weak and impressible, thinks such a deal of appearance, my dear.
So she waited for her Simon beside the tanyard gate, regardless of the pieman, who hinted it was late.
I tried not to feel conceited.
So the Apple-Tree said 'Eh!
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 775 When the verdict was called for, the Jury declined, As the word was so puzzling to spell; But they ventured to hope that the Snark wouldn't mind Undertaking that duty as well.
So the Snark found the verdict, although, as it owned, It was spent with the toils of the day : When it said the word GUILTY!
Boys don't all go to sleep at once, you know.
So these boys—but who are you talking about?
He said this was great severity, but it was evidently meant for a joke: so Sylvie laughed—a delicious musical little laugh, and laid her soft cheek on the top of her brother's curly head, as if it were a pillow, while she went on with the story.
So this Boy— But it wasn't me^ 00 know!
I would like to hear another story about that Boy.
So would /,said Bruno, stroking Sylvie's cheek again.
Reason and Instinct both tdl me I ought to go home.
So, good-night!
Never before had I seen him so deeply moved.
So, in the gathering twilight, I paced slowly homewards, in a tumultuous whirl of happy thoughts: my heart seemed full, and running over, with joy and thankfulness : all that I had so fervently longed for, and prayed for, seemed now to have come to pass.
There were some hundreds of them—very fine old men, and magnificently dressed in green velvet gowns with gold buttons: if they had a fault, it was that they always contradicted one another when he asked for their advice — and they certainly ate and drank
So, on the whole, he was rather glad to get rid of them.
Well, what then?
So, when the Pig played on the Accordion,Bruno went on, one of the Jars of Orange-marmalade didn't like the tune, and the other Jar of Orange-marmalade did like the tune—I \now I shall get confused among those Jars of Orange-marmalade, Sylvie!
With lightsome laughter.
Soft flowing after.
And pace in twos and threes about, The children of the North.
Some are waiting in the garden.
The sobs that ushered in each dish, '-, , And its departure followed, Nor yet my suicidal wish To be the cheese I hollowed.
Some desperate attempts were made ; To start a conversation; PHANTASMAGORIA 863 *'Madam,the sportive Brown essayed, Which kind of recreation, Hunting or fishing, have you made Your special occupation?
The Haunted-House Committee: I've often known them make a fuss Because a Ghost was French, or Russ, Or even from the City!
Some dialects are objected to — For one, the Irish brogue is : And then, for all you have to do.
Then followed a torrent of laughter and cheers: Then the ominous words It's a Boo— Then, silence.
Some fancied they heard in the air A weary and wandering sigh That sounded like —jum!
He drew it towards him, and again referred to his note-book.
Some of the labels —owing to insufficient adhesion—Here he stopped again, and carefully examined the page with his eyeglass.
she demanded imperiously.
Something about a duck?
''What was it he said?
Something about bees, I fancy— The Empress smiled in her meaningless way, and fanned herself.
?
Sometimes,I said.
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 755 Supposing that, when Pistol uttered the well-known words — *'Under which king, Bezonian?
Speak or die!
Sylvie whispered in reply.
Stand still!
Refuse cold mutton.
Starve your canaries.
With the calm deliberation, The intense deliberation Of a photographic artist: But he left them in a hurry, Left them in a mighty hurry, Stating that he would not stand it.
Stating in emphatic language What he'd be before he'd stand it.
And he hastily left the room.
Stay awhile, stay awhile!
Without sin, war would surely be impossible.
Still any mind, that has had in this life any keen interest, not in itself sinful, will surely find itself some congenial line of work hereafter.
I see no help for that —though I shall be sorry to give up my favorite studies.
Still, medicine, disease, pain, sorrow, sin—I fear they're all linked together.
And explained all the while in a popular style Which the Beaver could well understand.
Taking Three as the subject to reason about — A convenient number to state — We add Seven, and Ten, and then multiply out By One Thousand diminished by Eight.
The next Specimen,the Professor proclaimed, after carefully placing the little Elephant in the tray, among the Crystals and other Things, is a Flea^ which we will enlarge for the purposes of observation.
Taking a small pill-box from the tray, he advanced to the Megaloscope, and reversed all the tubes.
Bruno whispered to Sylvie, putting his arms round her neck.
Tell him yourself,said Sylvie.
And first—what kind of table?
Tell him!
said the Emperor, pushing his way through the crowd.
Tell us how to keep him safe!
I answered.
Tennyson said that of a worthier friend than me.
prettier swimming in the stream.
Than lying all snugly and flat?
Wellington may have no more battles to fight—and yet — 'We doubt not that, for one so true, There must be other, nobler wor\ to do.
Than when he fought at Waterloo, And Victor he must ever be!
I said.
Thank you so much for coming out to tell me!
But I've no doubt you take m,y view of it.
Thank you very much for your kind attention.
And now it's that strong, as—as a mad elephant might dance upon it!
Thank you very much!
Arthur's friend is at home here!
Thanks!
Let me send for some soap?
Thanks, no,said the Other Professor, keeping his face turned away.
I hope he is well, and you also?
Thanks, we are both quite well.
Are not all they seem!
That Camel passed, as Day grew dim Around the ruined Pump.
' And ofif they went, hand in hand.
That Fox were welly extremely wicked, weren't it.
Because he could not jump.
That Frog made no remar\, for he Was dismal as a dump: He Xnew the consequence must be That he would never get his fee— And still he sits, in miserie.
Seated once more by my lonely fireside, I tried to recall the strange vision of the night before, and to conjure up the face of the dear old Professor among the blazing coals.
That black one—with just a touch of red—would suit him well,I thought.
When that still calm was broken, A childish form hath burst into the throng; With tears and looks of sadness.
That bring no news of gladness.
Don't they draw a sharp boundary-line between Reason and Instinct?
That certainly was the orthodox view, a generation ago,said the Earl.
Then the bowsprit got mixed with the rudder sometimes A thing, as the Bellman remarked.
That frequently happens in tropical climes, When a vessel is, so to speak, snarked.
He's—what you said,Bruno replied looking at the Professor.
That hard word.
Yet often look they backward, And cheer him on, and bawl, For slower still, and still more slow.
That horseman and that charger go, And scarce advance at all.
692 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED she cried, breaking off again in her excitement.
That is her voice, and that's the very song!
So Bruno began, in the sweet childish treble I knew so well: — ''Say, what is the spell, when her fledgelings are eheeping.
That lures the bird home to her nest?
And walk the treadmill for a time.
That morning he had dressed with care.
And so went on to criticize — Your room's an inconvenient size: It's neither snug nor spacious.
That narrow window, I expect.
' On the Cow that surmounted the Moon: He shall rave of the Cat and the Fiddle, And the Dish that eloped with the Spoon: And his soul shall be sad for the Spider, When Miss Muffet was sipping her whey.
That so tenderly sat down beside her, And scared her away!
said the Professor.
That song is his own history, you know.
Why come they, why go they, in this so little ordinary a fashion?
That the music should make itself to vanish—that the hats, the boots, should make themselves to vanish—how is it, I pray you?
He dreamed that he stood in a shadowy Court, Where the Snark, with a glass in its eye, Dressed in gown, bands, and wig, was defending a pig On the charge of deserting its sty.
The Witnesses proved, without error or flaw.
Its flavour when cooked is more exquisite far Than mutton, or oysters, or eggs: (Some think it keeps best in an ivory jar, And some, in mahogany kegs:) You boil it in sawdust: you salt it in glue: You condense it with locusts and tape: Still keeping one
The Butcher would gladly have talked till next day, But he felt that the Lesson must end.
said the Emperor.
The Chancellor could scarcely believe his ears.
the Emperor thundered once more.
The Chancellor tottered down the hall—and in another minute the crowd divided, and the poor old Beggar was seen entering the Banqueting-Hall.
The remaining guests seemed only too glad to get away, leaving only the Count and our four selves.
The Count sank into an easy-chair, and panted a little.
The Medicine's the great thing, GAMMON AND SPINACH 699 you know.
The Diseases are much less important.
The vacant stare, the meaningless smile, had passed away: all could see that these two strange beings had returned to their senses.
The Emperor continued his speech as if there had been no interruption.
There was a rather awkward pause: the Professor evidently didn't know how to begin.
The Empress leant forwards, and whispered to him.
I want the supper to begin,Bruno corrected her.
The Empress took up the spoon in an absent manner, and tried to balance it across the back of her hand, and in doing this she dropped it into the dish : and, when she took it out again, it was full of spinach.
The poor Professor looked at her timidly : he was clearly at his wits' end again, and hoping for another hint.
The Empress whispered again.
The Professor rubbed his hands in childish delight.
The Experiment has succeeded!
But that was alarming enough.
The Fever is spreading fast: the London doctor has taken fright and left the place, and the only one now available isn't a regular doctor at all: he is apothecary, and doctor, and dentist, and I don't know what other trades, all in one.
' Read 'em out, and get on to the Specimens,' grumbled the Emperor.
The First Axiom,the Professor read out in a great hurry, consists of these words, ' Whatever is, is!
Her Imperial Highness is surprised,the Professor explained to the attendants: and some of them clapped their hands.
The Head-Cook made a low bow, and in doing so dropped a spoon on the table, as if by accident, just within reach of the Empress, who looked the other way and pretended not to see it.
It has two knobs—only two—you can count them, if you hke.
The Head-Cook stepped forwards, counted them, and retired satisfied.
Such a sentence would have not the slightest eflfect, As the pig had been dead for some years.
The Judge left the Court, looking deeply disgusted But the Snark, though a little aghast.
Bruno repeated.
The King nodded assent, and the children ran off.
Yes, I doos,said Bruno : and sat down again.
The Lion's speech.
And there's no place left for him!
The Other Professor came in reading a large book, which he held close to his eyes.
Supposing I was two or three boys!
The Other Professor sighed, and seemed to be sinking back into his reverie; but suddenly brightened up again, and addressed the Professor.
But he said it in a very low voice, and nobody but Sylvie heard him.
The Professor chuckled again.
said Sylvie, looking very much puzzled.
The Professor examined the papers carefully.
Smaller than elephants usually are, I believe?
The Professor gave a start of delighted surprise.
To which Bruno gravely repUed Fs got nuffin on my plate.
The Professor hastily put on his spectacles, to make sure that the facts were all right, to begin with: then he turned his jolly round face upon the unfortunate owner of the empty plate.
And in marched, or waddled—it is hard to say which is the right word—an Elephant, on its hind-legs, and playing on an enormous fife which it held with its forefeet.
The Professor hastily threw open a large door at the end of the Megaloscope, and the huge animal, at a signal from the Gardener, dropped the fife, and obediently trotted into the machine, the door of which was at once shut by the Professor.
But Sylvie only shook her head.
The Professor heard him not.
He means the multiplication-table,Sylvie explained.
The Professor looked annoyed, and shut up his notebook again.
Oh dear no!
The Professor looked dismayed.
the Empress asked, bending over the invalid.
The Professor looked up, and smiled feebly.
both children exclaimed.
The Professor made a candid confession.
I'm not sure, but I believe he was hanged.
The Professor overheard her.
There happened to be a pile of blankets close by: and THE BEGGAR S RETURN 739 the Professor had hardly said the word, when they were all unfolded and held up like curtains all around.
The Professor rapidly arranged them in two rows, so as to make a dark passage, leading straight from the door to the mouth of the cage.
For there are plenty more as good.
The Spasmodic or German School Firebrands and daggers!
In filling up a vacancy; Then Phantom, Goblin, Elf, and Sprite — If all these fail them, they invite The nicest Ghoul that they can see.
The Spectres said the place was low.
he said, in a voice like the heading of a chapter.
The Way To Do It!
For it leads unto his stable!
Then out spake Ulfrid Longbow,^ A valiant youth was he, Lo!
They knew it was not of the slightest use to I appeal to the Bellman about it—he would only refer to his Naval Code, and read out in pathetic tones Admiralty Instructions which none of them had ever been able to understand—so it generally ended in its bei
The helmsman ^ used to stand by with tears in his eyes : he knew it was all wrong, but alas!
The Count seemed about to ask further questions, but checked himself.
The hour makes himself to become late,he said.
As this poem is to some extent connected with the lay of the Jabberwock, let me take this opportunity of answering a question that has often been asked me, how to pronounce slithy toves.
The iin slithyis long, as in writhe; and tovesis pronounced so as to rhyme with groves.
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 759 He came as a Baker : but owned, when too late — And it drove the poor Bellman half-mad — He could only bake Bride-cake—for which, I may state, No materials were to be had.
The last of the crew needs especial remark, Though he looked an incredible dunce: He had just one idea—but, that one being Snark,The good Bellman engaged him at once.
ff Our readers will have followed with painful interest, the accounts we have from time to time published of the terrible epidemic which has, during the last two months, carried o-Q most of the inhabitants of the little fishing-harbour adjoining the villa
The last survivors, numbering twenty-three only, out of a population which, three short months ago, exceeded one hundred and twenty, were removed on Wednesday last, under the authority of the Local Board, and safely lodged in the County Hospital: and the
Chapter XX Gammon and Spinach ' My landlady's welcome had an extra heartiness about it: and though, with a rare delicacy of feeling, she made no direct allusion to the friend whose companionship had done so much to brighten life for me, I felt sure that i
The lonely evening seemed long and tedious: yet I hngered on, watching the dying fire, and letting Fancy mould the red embers into the forms and faces belonging to bygone scenes.
Must he then only live to weep, Who'd prove his friendship true and deep, By day a lonely shadow creep, At night-time languish, Oft raising in his broken sleep The moan of anguish?
The lover, if for certain days His fair one be denied his gaze.
And vainly proceeded to cite A number of cases, in which making laces Had been proved an infringement of right.
The maker of Bonnets ferociously planned A novel arrangement of bows : While the Billiard-marker with quivering hand Was chalking the tip of his nose.
746 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED And this was his rivair I thought.
The man who had won from him the heart of the woman he loved!
'Twas my fault after all, I find — Shake hands, old Turnip-top!
The name was hardly to my mind, But, as no doubt he meant it kind, I let the matter drop.
That jump would take it at least five miles!
The next thing is to explain a Process or two.
The company seated themselves again—room being found for the Elfin-King between his two children—and the Lord Chancellor rose once more, to propose the next toast.
The next toast—the hero of the day—why, he isn't here!
Hooray!
The old Fox is dead!
My father will be so pleased to see you!
The old man rose from his chair, with a smile, to wel- A FAIRY-DUET 685 come me; but his self-command was far less than his daughter's, and the tears coursed down his face as he grasped both my hands in his, and pressed them warmly.
Lady Muriel put aside the heap of music, and folded her hands together.
The one idea,the Earl resumed, that has seemed to me to overshadow all the rest, is that of Eternity—involving, as it seems to do, the necessary exhaustion of all sub- BEYOND THESE VOICES 667 jects of human interest.
said a sleepy little voice.
The owls hasn't gone to bed, and I s'a'n't go to seep wizout 00 sings to me!
' And always use, in answering.
The phrase 'Your Royal Whiteness!
And tempt thy fate no more, For such a steed as thou hast got Was never rid before!
The rabbits bow before thee.
Ill There was once a young man of Oporta, Who daily got shorter and shorter.
The reason he said Was the hod on his head.
A small table, containing cake and wine, stood in a corner o£ the Saloon; and here we found the Emperor and Empress waiting for us.
The rest of the Saloon had been cleared of furniture, to make room for the guests.
Who never more might breathe again.
The serving-man of Richard Roe Wept, inarticulate with woe: She wept, that waited on John Doe.
And yet, if I were to find him here,I muttered, as in solitary state I followed the porter, who was wheeling my luggage on a barrow, and if he were to 'stride a sudden hand in mine, And as\ a thousand things of homey I should not—no, 7 should not feel
The shortest way, as I well remembered, was to cross through the churchyard.
Why wasn't it made of—of—He broke off again.
Then the wine!
The rescuing party consisted of six sturdy fellows—fishermen from the neighbourhood—directed by the resident Physician of the Hospital, who came over for that purpose, 68o SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED heading a train of hospital-ambulances.
The six men had been selected—/rom a much larger number who had volunteered for this peaceJul forlorn hope''—for their strength and robust health, as the expedition was considered to be, even now, when the malady has expended its chief force, not unatten
It is a great strain on Faith — but not a breaking strain, I think.
The sufferings of horses^' I said, are chiefly caused by Mans cruelty.
That little Bruno is an embodied Mischief!
The suggestion was a welcome one to most of us, for some of the guests were beginning to look decidedly uneasy.
The hues of life are dull and gray.
The sweets of life insipid.
The thing can be done,said the Butcher, I think The thing must be done, I am sure.
The thing shall be done!
Its habit of getting up late you'll agree That it carries too far, when I say That it frequently breakfasts at five-o'clock tea, And dines on the following day.
The third is its slowness in taking a jest.
This box,carefully lifting it upon the table, and covering it with a heap of blankets, is quite full of it.
The way I made it was this—I took a lighted candle into a dark cupboard and shut the door.
Now, why shouldn't the same thing happen with th-e weight?
The whalebone gets so used to being bent, that it ca'n't straighten itself any more.
—as straight as pokers,' Bruno firmly repeated.
Then 00 must clasp oor hands — so.
As we walked back to our lodgings, Arthur sighed deeply once or twice, and seemed about to speak — but no words came, till we had entered the house, and had lit our candles, and were at our bedroom-doors.
Then Arthur said Good night, old fellow!
And Bruno laughed exultingly.
Then Bruno thought a little harder.
He says it must have been!
Then Bruno thought a little harder.
That was indeed the proudest moment of my life!
Then I filled a box with it.
After that I shall exhibit some Specimens.
Then I shall explain a Process or two.
Of course the cupboard was then full of Yellow Light.
Then I took a bottle of Black ink, and poured it over the candle : and, to my delight, every atom of the Yellow Light turned Blac\!
A leaf's a leaf, and everybody can see it; but Bruno's Bruno, and they ca'n't see hiniy unless they're eerie, like you.
Then I understood how it was that one sometimes sees —going through the woods in a still evening—one fernleaf rocking steadily on, all by itself.
I haven't got it with me,Sylvie whispered.
Then I won't cry,said Bruno manfully.
cried Bruno.
Then I'm afraid you know something about his tumbling,said the Professor.
My heart was too full to speak; and we all sat silent for a minute or two.
Then Lady Muriel rang the bell for tea.
Till (merely from nervousness, not from good will) They marched along shoulder to shoulder.
Then a scream, shrill and high, rent the shuddering sky And they knew that some danger was near: The Beaver turned pale to the tip of its tail.
For a minute she stood quite silent, looking upwards with a helpless gaze, as if even prayer were now useless, while her features worked and quivered with the great agony she was enduring.
Then a sudden inspiration seemed to come upon her and light up her face with a strange sweet smile.
And then where's the grandeur ?
Then as to a Mountain—why, you could carry it all away in a wheelbarrow, in a certain number of years!
Only the big whip!
Then came lessons,Sylvie hurried on, for I still had my handkerchief to my eyes.
PHANTASMAGORIA 85I Tell him you'll stand no sort of trick; Then, if he leers and chuckles, You just be handy with a stick (Mind that it's pretty hard and thick) And rap him on the knuckles!
Then carelessly remark 'Old coon!
Ever since she's been—well> not quite so clever as she once was—we've found it desirable to concoct little surprises for her.
Then comes the Lecture— What?
The Gardener looked round at them with a grin.
Then he led the way to the Pavilion; and as he went he sang: — GAMMON AND SPINACH 701 ''He looked again, and found it was A Double Rule of Three: *And all its Mystery' he said, 'Is clear as day to me!
He sat down, and began vaguely fingering the notes; but nothing resembling the tune came out.
Then he, too, grew excited.
He came back again, you know, and he thanked the Lion very much, for telling him the story.
Then his head had growed up again?
It was a strangely sad and silent party that walked up to the little church and back ; and I could not help feeling that it was much more like a funeral than a wedding: to Lady Muriel it was in fact, a funeral rather than a wedding, so heavily did the pre
Then we had breakfast; and, all too soon, the vehicle was at the door, which was to convey Arthur, first to his lodgings, to pick up the things he was taking with him, and then as far towards the death-stricken hamlet as it was considered safe to go.
EARLY VERSE 78 MELODIES I There was an old farmer of Readall, Who made holes in his face with a needle.
Then went far deeper in Than to pierce through the skin, And yet strange to say he was made beadle.
And really I'm in such a state, I hope you'll come at any rate, quite early in the morning, quite early in the morning.
Then with prancing bays & yellow chaise, we'll away to Gretna Green.
she suddenly exclaimed, laying the Jewel once more in his hand, I do believe it was the same Jewel all the time!
Then you choosed it from itself^'^ Bruno thoughtfully remarked.
And yet we are asked to believe that its intellectual level is above Sir Isaac Newton!
Then you hold that pure Instinct contains no Reason at all?
Then you'll come down: and you tvont Jiave any supper: but you'll have a good whipping!
Then you'll go to bed.
You'll have a good whipping!
Then you'll have your lessons.
First you'll go up to the nursery, and wash your faces, and put on clean pinafores.
Then you'll hear the bell ring for supper.
And Tibbs will have the best of it!
Then, as my tears could never bring The friendly Phantom back.
And isn't quite so sour?
Then, peering round w^ith curious eyes, He muttered Goodness gracious!
And a chronic state of wet in your feet.
Then—I recommend the Sea.
the Professor replied, looking up in alarm.
There are only,(he referred to his notes again) only two more, that are really necessary!
And what religious ministrations are there to be had?
There are three brave men down there,the Earl replied, his voice trembling with emotion, gallant heroes as TO THE rescue!
The two little hats, and Sylvie's walking-jacket, were handed round among the ladies, with many exclamations of delight.
There certainly was a sort of witchery of beauty about them.
Its voice was a sort of mixture—there was the roaring of a lion, and the bellowing of a bull, and now and then a scream like a gigantic parrot.
There is no judging by the voice!
My heart is wasted with my woe!
There is no rest—in Venice, on The Bridge of Sighs!
Little Birds are sleeping All among the pins, 726 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Where the loser wins: Where, I say, he sneezes When and how he pleases— So the Tale begins.
There was a Pig that sat alone Beside a ruined Pump: By day and night he made his moan— // would have stirred a heart of stone To see him wring his hoofs and groan.
Then you'll be at your ease!
There was a roar of laughter from all the assembly, and then a great deal of confused whispering.
It is now the size of the Common Horse — Equus Communis!
There was another general rush, to look through the tubes, and the Pavilion rang with shouts of delight, through which the Professor's anxious tones could scarcely be heard.
she added cheerfully, looking in all directions for the children.
There was no answer, and she turned to Lady Muriel with a puzzled smile.
The Bellman looked scared, And was almost too frightened to speak: But at length he explained, in a tremulous tone.
There was only one Beaver on board; And that was a tame one he had of his own, Whose death would be deeply deplored.
Arthur asked.
There were nearly one hundred, a week ago,said the Earl: but there have been twenty or thirty deaths since then.
Finally, the things were piled together on the centreottoman, and the guests, despairing of seeing the children again, began to wish good-night and leave the house.
There were only some eight or nine left—to whom the Count was explaining, for the twentieth time, how he had had his eye on the children during the last verse of the song; how he had then glanced round the room, to see what effect de great chest-noteha
I 'fraid I must tell him!
There weren't — nuffin in the hamper!
Meanwhile there'll be time for another Experiment,she said.
There will indeed!
She says people will eat so much at the Banquet, they'll be too sleepy to attend to the Lecture afterwards — and perhaps she's right.
There'll just be a little refreshmenty when the people first arrive—as a kind of surprise for the Empress, you know.
There'll be no dinner!
There'll only be the big whip!
But Bruno did not hear the question.
There's somebody scratching at the door and wanting to come in,he said.
) Curtain rises and discovers the Speaker, who comes forward, thinking aloud, 823 1 824 VERSE Ladies and Gendemenseems stiflF and cold.
There's something personal in Young and Old; ril try Dear Friends{addresses audience) Oh!
There is only but one verse left to be sung!
These last words were not in the gentle voice of Mein Herr, but in the deep bass of the French Count.
It is a melancholy pleasure to place on record the names of these genuine martyrs—than whom none, surely, are more worthy to be entered on the glory-roll of England's heroes!
They are as follows:— The Rev.
But no Bruno repUed: it seemed that the two children had vanished as suddenly, and as mysteriously, as the song.
They are playing us a trick?
EARLY VERSE 803 As to any delight to be got from the sight, It is all very well for a flat, But / think it all gammon, for hooking a salmon Is better than twenty of that!
They say that a man of a right-thinking mind Will love the dumb creatures he sees — What's the use of his mind, if he's never inclined To pull a fish out of the Tees?
And couldn't make them out at all.
They seemer so strange a sight.
There was not one that spoke to us, Of all that thronged the street: So he sadly got into a 'bus, And pattered with his feet.
They sent him word I had not gone (We know it to be true) ; If she should push the matter on, What would become of you ?
Each had an arm round the other, and the setting sun shed a golden halo round their heads, like what one sees in pictures of saints.
They were looking in our direction, but evidently did not see us, and I soon made out that Lady Muriel had for once passed into a condition familiar to me^ that we were both of us eerie, and that, though we could see the children so plainly, we were qui
Well, an' she axes my pardon fur 't.
Think o' that, now!
So one, whose ticket's marked Return,* When to the lonely roadside station He flies in fear and perturbation.
Thinks of his home—the hissing urn — Then runs with flying hat and hair.
It's very badly expressed, but I quite see it now!
Thirteen minutes and a half ago,he went on, looking first at Bruno and then at his watch as he spoke, you said 'this Cat's very kind to the Mouses.
Such is Human Perversity.
This also seems a fitting occasion to notice the other hard words in that poem.
Now fling the door open!
This did not need to be done : the three men had only to leap out of the way, and the fearful monster flung the door open for itself, and, with a yell like the whistle of a steam-engine, rushed into the cage.
Till it looked all squares and oblongs, Like a complicated figure In the Second Book of Euclid.
This he perched upon a tripod — Crouched beneath its dusky cover — Stretched his hand, enforcing silence — Said, Be motionless, I beg you!
cried the Professor.
This is a most interesting Experiment!
You shall hear them by and by.
This is a piece of luck!
Why, look here, Mister Sir!
This is being good!
Lady Muriel gaily exclaimed.
This is only an ex tempore game of Hide-andSeek!
But we've got our brave Captain to thank(So the crew would protest) that he's bought us the best — A perfect and absolute blank!
This was charming, no doubt : but they shortly found out That the Captain they trusted so well Had only one notion for crossing the ocean.
Has the cat had enough?
This was to Bruno, who had brought back the saucer only half-emptied.
The Fifth is one you may prefer That I should quote entire: — The King must be addressed as 'Sir!
This, from a simple courtier, Is all the Laws require: ''But, should you wish to do the thing With out-and-out politeness, Accost him as 'My Goblin King!
he bellows, I really am not able!
Though I pull my shoulder out of joint, I cannot get him past this point.
They sit & chatter, they chatter with the cook, the guardians, so they're called, of public peace.
Through the tanyard was heard the dismal sound, How on earth is it policemen never, never, never, can be found?
And then he heard that queer noise again—Thump!
Thump!
So, as he was walking along the road, he heard behind him such a curious sort of noise—a sort of a Thump!
Thump!
Thump!
Thump!
Do you want a battered hide, Or scratches to your face apphed?
Thus his sister calm rephed.
As the lawyer to whom the defence was intrusted, Went bellowing on to the last.
Thus the Barrister dreamed, while the bellowing seemed To grow every moment more clear : Till he woke to the knell of a furious bell.
Go and rest your weary head.
Thus the prudent brother said.
Couldst thou know The wretched home thou keepest!
Thy brother, drowned in daily woe, Is thankful when thou sleepest; For if I laugh, however low.
And I remember nothing more That I can clearly fix.
Till I was sitting on the floor, Repeating Two and five are four.
Which the eye might follow onward.
Till they centered in the breast-pin, Centered in the golden breast-pin.
*'The music of Midsummer-madness Shall sting him with many a bite.
Till, in rapture of rollicking sadness, He shall groan with a gloomy delight: He shall swathe him, li\e mists of the morning.
Her part was a very short one—only a few words—and she sang it timidly, and very low indeed, A FAIRY-DUET 693 scarcely audibly, but the sweetness of her voice was simply indescribable; I have never heard any earthly music like it.
Tis a secret, and so let us whisper it lowAnd the name of the secret is Love!
A gentleman, with a lady, and child, and a large dog, were down at the end of a pier on which I was walking.
To amuse his child, I suppose, the gentleman put down on the ground his umbrella and the lady's parasol, and then led the way to the other end of the pier, from which he sent the dog back for the deserted articles.
hope hath fled!
To atoms dash the doubly dead!
They take me a walk: though tired and stiff.
To climb the heights I madly agree; And, after a tumble or so from the cliff, i They kindly suggest the Sea.
Or wa\es the tired mother, whose infant is weeping.
To cuddle and croon it to rest?
A gallant feat of horsemanship Will be performed to-day.
To eastward and to westward, The crowd divides amain.
It needs,that Camel said to him, '*Something more fairy-like and slim.
To execute a jump!
No doubt,said I, they setded who Was fittest to be sent: Yet still to choose a brat like you.
To haunt a man of forty-two.
By day, if he should be alone — At home or on a walk — You merely give a hollow groan.
To indicate the kind of tone In which you mean to talk.
Only think o' that!
To mak' amends!
The Professor came down, and led the way to where a post had been driven firmly into the ground.
To one side of the post was fastened a chain, with an iron weight hooked on to the end of it, and from the other side 714 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED projected a piece of whalebone, with a ring at the end of it.
'Tis your glorious duty to seek it!
To seek it with thimbles, to seek it with care; To pursue it with forks and hope; To threaten its life with a railway-share; To charm it with smiles and soap!
THE HUNTING OF THE SNARK 777 He was black in the face, and they scarcely could trace The least likeness to what he had been: While so great was his fright that his waistcoat turned white — A wonderful thing to be seen!
To the horror of all who were present that day, He uprose in full evening dress, And with senseless grimaces endeavoured to say What his tongue could no longer express.
But no.
To their utter astonishment, the Emperor knelt as the beggar approached, and with bowed head murmured Forgive us!
She has reached him his mini\in gunlet: She has hurled the old shoelet for luc\: She is busily baling a bunlet.
To welcome him home with his Duc\, On he speeds, never wasting a wordlet.
he said to Bruno, as they returned to their places.
To which Bruno made reply, I always loved Sylvie, so I'll never get prickly like that!
Perhaps you pushed him?
To which Bruno replied, very seriously, Didn't pushed THE BEGGAR S RETURN 743 him much—he were a lovely china man,he added hastily, evidendy very anxious to change the subject.
(Just to speak on a pleasanter theme,) Observe, my dear brother, our love for each other — He's the one I like best in the stream.
To-morrow I mean to invite him to dine (We shall all of us think it a treat) ; If the day should be fine, I'll just drop him a linCy And we'll settle what time we're to meet.
The flood-gates had given way at last, and the outburst of grief was the most terrible I had ever witnessed.
Totally regardless of my presence, she flung herself down on the turf, burying her face in the grass, and with her hands clasped round the little marble cross, Oh, my darling, my darling!
And the fall of a pin might be heard.
Transportation for lifewas the sentence it gave, And then to be fined forty pound.
If I'd been rather later, I'll Be bound,I added, trying (Most unsuccessfully) to smile, You'd have been busy all this while.
Trimming and beautifying?
Haven't you ever seen that?
Try if you can see the fairy-sleeper on it, next time; but don't pic\ the leaf, whatever you do; let the little one sleep on!
We heard the front-door hastily opened, and voices outside: then a knock at the door of the smoking-room, and the old house-keeper appeared, looking a little scared.
Two persons, my Lord, to speak with Dr.
Of all the fishes of the sea There's none so good as Salmon!
UPON THE LONELY MOOR (1856) [It is always interesting to ascertain the sources from which our great poets obtained their ideas: this motive has dictated the publication of the following: painful as its appearance must be to the admirers of Wordsworth and
The next thing to be done,the Professor cheerfully remarked to the Lord Chancellor, as soon as the applause, caused by the recital of the Pig-Tale, had come to an end, is to drink the Emperor's health, is it not?
Undoubtedly!
said the Emperor.
Undoubtedly!
But the Professor's presence of mind did not desert him.
Undraw those curtains!
^ At the rate of a stroke and two-thirds in a second.
Unless the hen was a poacher, which is unlikely.
Oo can^ though!
Unless they're welly tight in.
It's a pity.
Unless you remark that kind of thing at the moment, it's very apt to get overlooked!
That he had loved—and loved a Cook.
Upon the beach he stood and sighed Unheedful of the treacherous tide; Thus sang he to the listening main.
For that's the way to jump!
Uprose that Pig, and rushed, full whacJ{, Against the ruined Pump: 728 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Rolled over li\e -an empty sac\, And settled down upon his bac\, While all his bones at once went **Crac}{\It was a jatal jump.
Sylvie was quite decided on this point.
Wait till afterwards,she said.
Next we record the Rev.
Walter Saunders, Wesleyan Minister.
Port-wine, he says, when rich and sound.
Warms his old bones like nectar: And as the inns, where it is found, Are his especial hunting-ground.
Her idea of passive beauty PHANTASMAGORIA Was a squinting of the left-eye, Was a drooping of the right-eye.
Was a smile that went up sideways To the corner of the nostrils.
Wauch!
Wauch!
That I might lose, not the words alone, but the tune also—that is quite curious, I suppose?
We all supposed it, heartily.
he cried, for whatever betide.
We are both in the selfsame condition!
I believe that there is life everywhere —not material only, not merely what is palpable to our senses—but immaterial and invisible as well.
We believe in our own immaterial essence—call it 'soul,' or 'spirit,' or what you will.
' An' she cries a bit.
We both on us cries a bit— Again I kept silence for a while.
Each seated on his favourite post.
We chumped and chawed the buttered toast They gave us foi; our tea.
And we have behaved—my wife and I —like two arrant Knaves.
We deserve no better name.
He is wandering again,Lady Muriel whispered, and returned to the bedside.
We drew a little nearer also : but no, this had none of the incoherence of delirium.
But a Snark, on the which we might lovingly gaze.
We have never beheld till now!
While he served out additional rations).
We have sailed many months, we have sailed many weeks, (Four weeks to the month you may mark).
But never as yet ('tis your Captain who speaks) Have we caught the least glimpse of a Snark!
We have sailed many weeks, we have sailed many days, (Seven days to the week I allow).
The Gardener asked me to come and see if it would do.
We may as well go before it gets dark.
It has occurred to me, as the most probable solution of the *Bee'-mystery, that a swarm of Bees have only one mind among them.
We often see one mind animating a most complex collection of limbs and organs, when joined together.
This is Medicine-Day!
We only give Medicine once a week.
What lovely crimson tints!
We shall have a glorious day to-morrow—We had followed her across the room, and were standing in a little group, talking in low tones in the gathering gloom, when we were startled by the voice of the sick man, murmuring words too indistinct for the ear
It doesnt try, in any reasonable sense of the word: it simply bangs itself about!
We should call a puppy imbecile, that behaved so.
I could distinguish no words, but there was a dreamy sense of music in the air that seemed to grow ever louder and louder, as i£ coming nearer to us.
We stood quite silent, and in another minute the two children appeared, coming straight towards us through an arched opening among the trees.
It will be pleasanter than over the common, even though it is getting a little dark.
We turned aside into the shade of interlacing boughs, which formed an architecture of almost perfect symmetry, grouped into lovely groined arches, or running out, far as the eye could follow, into endless aisles, and chancels, and naves, like some ghost
I echoed, from the very depths of my heart.
We were back again at the Hall by eight in the morning, and found Lady Muriel and the Earl, and the old 678 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED Vicar, waiting for us.
You will need all your strength to-morrow— Well, I will go,said Arthur.
We will be here in good time to-morrow.
the Professor assented.
We will have some Experiments.
And the Second consists of these words, 'Whatever isn't, isn't!
We will now go on to the Specimens, The first tray contains Crystals and other Things.
Black Light, and Nothing, look so extremely alike, at first sight, that I don't wonder he failed to distinguish them!
We will now proceed to the Third Experiment.
he cried.
We'll do without it: I now remember all about it; I wrote the thing myself.
he shouted at the Gardener, whom they found standing upon one foot, singing softly to himself, and rolling a hedgehog up and down with the other foot.
Well, I wanted fur to know what hedgehogs lives on: so I be a-keeping this here hedgehog—fur to see if it eats potatoes— Much better keep a potato,said the Professor; and see if hedgehogs eat it!
I hazarded.
Well, a bird of some kind?
How can you?
Well, but it /V,Bruno persisted.
) He runned away to get a good look at the Lion; 'cause he wanted to see if it were the same Lion what used to nubble little Boys' heads oflf; and he wanted to know how big it was!
Well, he ran away, to get a good look at the Lion.
Sylvie gave up the point.
Well, he was a very good Boy, and he always kept his promises, and he had a big cupboard— Bruno's picnic 645 —for to keep all his promises in!
Suppose you discover a remedy for some disease hitherto supposed to be incurable.
Well, it is delightful for the moment, no doubt —full of interest—perhaps it brings you fame and fortune.
What could sJie have done to need it?
Well, it were loike this, you see?
You know you ca'n't see a Flea, properly, without a magnifying'glsiss—what we call a Microscope.
Well, just in the same way, you ca'n't see an Elephant, properly, without a minimifying-glass.
'' A good many other things, I should hope^' Arthur said earnestly.
Well, maybe.
However what she really said was and my father tried to account for it by some wretched joke about pro bono publico.
Well, the dog laid down the bone — not in disgust with the pun, which 686 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED would have shown it to be a dog of taste—^but simply to rest its jaws, poor thing!
GAMMON AND SPINACH 697 I 'fraid we've been very long in coming,Bruno politely remarked.
Well, yes,the Professor assented.
''Some o£ it,Sylvie corrected him.
Well, you'd only want a certain number of tea-cups to hold it all.
In a minute or two they returned, slowly and gravely.
Well?
Pale, trembling, speechless, the Gold Stick came slowly back again.
Well?
They shuddered to think that the chase might fail, And the Beaver, excited at last.
Went bounding along on the tip of its tail.
Weuchk!
Weuchk!
Bruno looked at it admiringly.
What a lovely brightness!
a higher delight to be drawn from the sight Of fish full of life and of glee ?
What a noodle you are!
As I'm a living Wraith!
What a re-markable cigar!
Then I'd better go and—and brush myself a little.
What a state mm!
said Bruno: but the Professor thought it best not to hear the question.
What are you doing with that hedgehog?
So the Oven said 'O!
What are you going to do with all that Bread?
And Bruno shook his head, and he said 'Oh dear, oh dear!
What bad creatures these Foxes are!
We old men have no claim to be active!
What can an old man do but die?
Bruno turned a look of solemn enquiry on his old friend.
What do that word mean?
Then all the flags were dropped in a moment, as the HeadCook raised the cover from an enormous dish.
What is it?
the Professor cried in great excitement.
What is it?
said Bruno.
What is there grand about the Sea?
We met a dog carrying home a bone.
What it wanted it for, I've no idea : certainly there was no meat on it— A strange sensation came over me, that I had heard all this, or something exactly like it, before: and I almost expected her next words to be perhaps he meant to make a cloak for
I wish to make an Irish stew.
What meat is in that stew to go?
When he cried Steer to starboard, but keep her head \ larboard!
What on earth was the helmsman to do ?
But five and two are six.
What really passed I never learned.
'' I asked.
What right have we to assume that they ^ave minds?
I think it /V,said Lady Muriel, looking a mute appeal to her father.
What right have we to make that assumption?
) So he said *Oh dear, oh dear!
What shall I do with these Foxes?
Without the least vestige of land: And the crew were much pleased when they found it to be A map they could all understand.
What's the good of Mercator's North Poles and Equators, Tropics, Zones, and Meridian Lines?
I replied.
What's the matter?
Sylvie suggested.
What, ill on the wrong dayT exclaimed the Professor.
And answered with wisdom to boot.
What?
Do but look at that dish filled with glittering fish, Has Nature a picture like that?
What?
So he said 'Now it's my Birthday.
Whatever shall I do to keep my Birthday?
Said, One of the two will be wet through and through, And t'other'll be late for his tealEARLY VERSE 805 THE LADY OF THE LADLE (1854) The Youth at Eve had drunk his fill.
Where stands the Royalon the Hill, And long his mid-day stroll had made, On the so-called Marine Parade— (Meant, I presume, for Seamen brave, Whose march is on the Mountain v^ave; 'Twere just the bathing-place for him Who stays on land till he can
Though thoughtlets cling, closely as wax, To the spot where the beautiful birdlet So quietly quac\s.
Where the Lobsterlet lurJ{s, and the Crablet So slowly and sleepily crawls: Where the Dolphin s at home, and the Dablet Pays long ceremonious calls: Where the Grublet is sought by the Froglet: Where the Frog is pursued by the Duc\: Where the Duc}{let is c
Little Birds are playing Bagpipes on the shore.
Where the tourists snore: *'Than/^s!
The first is the taste.
Which is meagre and hollow, but crisp: Like a coat that is rather too tight in the waist, p With a flavour of Will-o'-the-Wisp.
The fourth is its fondness for bathing-machines.
Which it constantly carries about.
' And the 658 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED eldest little Fox said Whihuauch!
Whihuauch!
Down he sank in a chair—ran his hands through his hair — And chanted in mimsiest tones Words whose utter inanity proved his insanity.
While he rattled a couple of bones.
he cried, as I began To mutter some excuse.
Who can have patience with a man That's got no more discretion than An idiotic goose?
Who invented those spades of wood?
Who was it cut them out of the tree ?
And he scrambled down off his chair, and went and cautiously peeped out through the door-way.
Who was it wanted to come in?
II There was an eccentric old draper.
Who wore a hat made of brown paper, It went up to a point, Yet it looked out of joint, The cause of which he said was ^'vapour.
The proper thing, as you were late, Was certainly to go: But, with the roads in such a state, I got the Knight-Mayor's leave to wait For half an hour or so.
Who's the Knight-Mayor?
He would not sing for me.
Whoe'er would expect a pigeon to sing, A simpleton he must be!
And one, a dotard grim and gray, Who wasteth childhood's happy day In work more profitless than play.
Whose icy breast no pity warms, Whose little victims sit in swarms.
I asked three gay young dogs from town To join us in our folly.
Whose mirth, I thought, might serve to drown 862 VERSE My sister's melancholy: The lively Jones, the sportive Brown, And Robinson the jolly.
While Shakespeare's self, with all his ancient fires,, Lights up the forms that tremble on our wires?
Why can't we have, in theatres ideal.
It's very jfine to throw the blame On me in such a fashion!
Why didn't you enquire my name The very minute that you came?
Pussie's ever so thirsty!
Why do you want my saucer?
said the Emperor.
Why does not the Prince appear?
It certainly wasn't the wind, for the evening-breeze had quite died away again, and not a leaf was stirring over our heads.
Why does that one leaf rock so, without the others?
said the Professor.
Why don't you have events, or circumstances?
The good, without the evil of the real ?
Why may not Marionettes be just as good As larger actors made of flesh and blood ?
Merely old Madeira!
Why wasn't it—?
he added triumphantly.
Why, / asked the Professor three riddles!
Suddenly the Professor started as if he had been electrified.
Why, I had nearly forgotten the most important part of the entertainment!
Oh hard is your heart for to act such a pai;t; Is it iron, or granite, or steel?
Why, I really can't say—it is many a day Since mv heart was accustomed to feel.
It's blue, one way,she said softly to herself, and it's red the other way!
Why, I thought there were two of them—Father!
I never can keep mine more than twenty-four hours.
Why, a birthday stays that long by itself!
When oo're goody I suppose?
Why, it is a sort of treat, being good, isn't it?
How long ago?
Why, it isn't invented yet!
cried the Professor, trotting across the room in great excitement.
Why, it must be the Other Professor, that's been lost for ever so long!
the Empress said faintly, as she put her spy-glass to her eye.
Why, it's Spinach^ I declare!
Sylvie was quite excited, too, by this time; and the two children eagerly held up the Jewel to the light, and spelled out the legend between them, all will love sylvie.
Why, this is the other Jewel!
said the Professor.
Why, you could put it all into a teacup!
Quha nou ys he sae bauld an braw ^^ To dare to enter yn ?
Wi' eager bounde hes ilka honde Gane till that caverne dreir, Fou ^^ many a yowl -^^ ys ^^ hearde arounde, Fou ^^ many a screech of feir.
B.
Wiffie!
' Those were her very words, I assure you!
Will Uggug be at the Banquet?
Shall I hold the bouquet higher?
Will it come into the picture?
Oxford^ 1855.
\ EARLY VERSE 813 P THE MOCK TURTLE'S SONG Beneath the waters of the sea Are lobsters thick as thick can be — They love to dance with you and me.
He offered large discount—he offered a cheque (Drawn to bearer) for seven-pounds-ten: But the Bandersnatch merely extended its neck And grabbed at the Banker again.
Without rest or pause—while those frumious jaws Went savagely snapping around — He skipped and he hopped, and he floundered and flopped, Till fainting he fell to the ground.
he cheerfully responded.
Won't ee step in?
I did pity it so!
Won't you join my Charitable Association for supplying dogs with poc\ets?
Men looked eagerly to see how the Emperor would receive the bold intruder.
Would he hurl him from the steps of the dais?
Well—I hardly know,Sylvie replied in the vaguest manner.
Would it make him any happier?
Do tell me what you 690 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED think about them!
Would they, for instance (supposing such beings to exist), would they have any moral responsibility?
It wouldn't be the thing to leave off, you know.
Wouldn't be what thing?
I have a saddel—Say'st thou soe?
Wyth styrruppes, Knyghte, to boote?
I try the rocks, and I think it cool That they laugh with such an excess of glee, As I heavily slip into every pool That skirts the cold cold Sea.
YE CARPETTE KNYGHTE I have a horse—a ryghte goode horse — Ne doe Y envye those Who scoure ye playne yn headye course Tyll soddayne on theyre nose 856 VERSE They lyghte wyth unexpected force Yt ys—a horse of clothes.
Wi' eager iye, wi' yalpe an crye Ye hondes yode ^ down ye rocks, Ahead o£ au' their companye Kenneth ye panky ^ foxe.
Ye foxe hes soughte that cave of awe Forewearied ^ wi* hiz rin.
I have a bytte—a ryghte good bytte — As shall bee scene yn tyme.
Ye jawe of horse yt wyll not fytte; Yts use ys more sublyme.
790 VERSE Like ane wi' thirstie appetite Quha swalloweth orange pulp, Wes hearde a huggle an a bite, A swallow an a gulp.
Ye kynge hes lap frae aff hiz steid, Outbrayde ^ hiz trenchant brande; Quha on my packe of hondes doth feed, Maun deye benead thilke hande.
Gurgles withyn ye flowan wave Throw channel braid an deep Never withyn that dreir recesse Wes sene ye lyghte of daye, Quhat bode azont ^ yts mirkinesse ^ Nane kend an nane mote saye.
Ye monarche rade owr brake an brae An drave ye yellynge packe, Hiz meany ^ au' richte cadgily ^ Are wendynge^ yn hiz tracke.
said Sylvie You've got one yourself!
Yes, I know,said Bruno: but I wanted mine for to give it some m.
Would Fairies be another instance?
Yes, I think so.
And Bruno walked in the middle, so that the Lamb mightn't see the Lion— It were jlightened^' Bruno explained.
Yes, and it trembled so; and it got paler and paler; and, before they'd got to the top of the hill, it was a white little Lamb—as white as snow!
But we've seen Elephants before,the Emperor grumbled.
Yes, but not through a MegaloscopeT the Professor eagerly replied.
Yet how simple it is!
Yes, it's very simple,Sylvie said politely.
Father, could Sylvie choose a thing from itself?
Yes, my own one,the old man replied to Sylvie, not LIFE OUT OF DEATH 749 noticing Bruno's embarrassing question, it was the same Jewel—but you chose quite right.
7l6 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED On my way home, I passed the cottage where the old man Hved, whose face always recalled to me the day when I first met Lady Muriel; and I glanced in as I passed, half-curious to see if he were still living there.
Yes: the old man was still alive.
The music of Heaven may be something beyond our powers of thought.
Yet the music of Earth is sweet!
The speeches come next, don't you know?
You always love the speeches, dont you?
But these are only reasons for not denying.
You have more reasons than this, have you not?
THE PROFESSOR S LECTURE 713 as Bruno returned to his place, still thoughtfully rubbing his elbows, is the production of that seldom-seen-butgreatly-to-be-admired phenomenon, Black Light!
You have seen White Light, Red Light, Green Light, and so on: but never, till this wonderful day, have any eyes but mine seen Blac\ Light!
' 'Very good, my child!
You may go to Bruno's Picnic' So they set off.
said the Professor.
You may leave me now—to ruminate.
I echoed.
You may well say 'good night'!
she whispered.
You mean that Eric Lindon is here?
The Jury had each formed a different view (Long before the indictment was read), And they all spoke at once, so that none of them knew One word that the others had said.
You must know—said the Judge: but the Snark exclaimed Fudge!
the Empress exclaimed with tears in her eyes.
You seldom hear anything so beautiful as that—even in a Valentine!
Sylvie said contemptuously.
You shouldn't put the Lesson so soon.
It was kind of vou.
You were with us when we saw the last of—She paused a moment, and went on more hurriedly.
I seized the poker, and with an artful touch or two revived the waning glow, while Fancy—no coy minstrel she—sang me once again the magic strain I loved to hear.
You're welcome, little ones!
Now it seemed to be Bruno's roguish smile that sparkled for a moment, and died away : now it was Sylvie's rosy cheek : and now the Professor's jolly round face, beaming with delight.
You're welcome, my little ones!
he shouted.
Your B's!
Nothing but flags.
Your Imperial Highness!
What do it mean to say 'a singular boy'?
he whispered to Sylvie.
Mister Sir!
he whispered.
PHANTASMAGORIA 849 You're like a man I used to meet, Who got one day so furious In arguing, the simple heat Scorched both his slippers of?
his feet!
Oh, Simon, Simon!
how could you treat your love so ill?
What made you think it was discontented?
iC 9 Hi 722 SYLVIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED cause it grumbled in its throat.
Time rolled away, and so did every shell, Small by degrees and beautifully less,^l.
e.
That's what we want to know!
echoed the crowd.
But wherefore all this mustering .
f^ Wherefore this vast array?
779 780 VERSE PUNCTUALITY Man naturally loves delay, And to procrastinate; Business put of?
from day to day Is always done too late.
How long must we wait?
grumbled the Emperor.
His death is believed to have ta\en place two or three wee\s ago, as the words ''Died October 5were found written on the wall of the room which he is \nown to have occupied—the house being shut up, and apparently not having been entered for some time.
hast—though not a whit behind the other four in glorious self-denial and devotion to duty—let us record the name of Father Francis, a young Jesuit Priest who had been only a few m^onths in the place.
What's the name of the stuff?
he asked.
''Please do!
he cried eagerly.
The Specimen is now ready for 710 SYLYIE AND BRUNO CONCLUDED observation!
he proclaimed.
I didn't quite catch what you said!
he repeated.
Sylvie!
he said, in a perfectly audible whisper.
850 VERSE To keep me waiting here, instead Of telling me at once That this was not the house!
he said.
Now that are a really nice story!
he said.
Who then are these dear children, I pray you?
he said.
iC 9 Tis the voice of the Jubjub!
he suddenly cried.
''Preoccupied^ your Majesty!
he was saying.