IndoEuro Exam 2 Readings

Russian Soldiers

Fools Ethnic Fools Austria Dude recalls his friends story of Russian occupation and the Russians thinking his toilet was a well which they drank from and the bathtub was used for coal and how they couldn't ride a bike without getting hands and feet caught in spokes.

The Twelve Men of Gotham

Fools Ethnic Fools England 12 dudes go fishing and some stay on dry land, heading back they pray that none of them have drowned, they count off and forget to include themselves, rush back trying to find the missing man, passing courtier asks what is happening and offers to help, he asks what he will get, they say all the money they have, he counts each man by tapping on the shoulder and gets the money because the 12 men are stupid.

Irons Hans

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Brothers Grimm King lives next to a great forest in which great men never return from. Legend says theres a beast under the lake killing everyone who enters, king takes troops in, drains lake, chains up the small wild creature with matted red hair, named Iron Hans. Hans is displayed in king's courtyard, son plays with golden ball and it rolls into the cage, Hans will give it back if he takes the key from under his mother's pillow and sets him free, he does, Hans free, offers help whenever needed, dad is pissed, boy runs away, works as gardener for a king, sees a pretty princess daily, goes to fight for this foreign king, king scoffs at him, sends him to battle on 3 legged horse, with shovel and bucket, calls for Hans who gives him dope horse and armor, destroys enemy, carries king the flag, princess gives the knight an apple, she calls for a wedding, whoever has the golden apple weds her, he shows up as lowly gardener, marriage, Irons Hans returns with spell broken as red knight. the end

The Blue Light

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Brothers Grimm Soldier dismissed from the army for his injuries, he will die and starve in the woods, finds an old woman, she asks him to go into a well and get a lamp at the bottom, he is depressed so he says whatever bitch, gets lowered, sees instead of water there is a cavern with chests and sacks, he grabs the lamp, tells her to pull him all the way out before she can be given the lamp, she tells him to rot in hell, drops him, he lights the lamp, spirit comes out, grants him the wish of a house in the royal city, wish granted, goes there, lights lamp, wishes for the princess to do whatever he wants, he makes her clean his house, tells her dad, they think it's a dream, in case it isn't she is told to mark the door with chalk, she does the second night, spirit marks all the doors with chalk in the city, third night she secretly leaves a shoe under his bed, guards come and throw him in jail, through the jail window he bribes a boy to get his lamp, he is brought to the execution spot, granted the last wish of lighting his pipe from an old lamp, lamp is lit, he unleashes the spirit to kill the guards, judges, the nobleman, executioner, and to save his own life the king gives the soldier his kingdom, marriage to the princess, happiness, the end.

The Master Cat, Puss in Boots

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Charles Perrault Poor miller is left with only mill, a donkey, and a cat, he divides these up amongst three sons without a lawyer, youngest son gets the cat and is sad because his two older brothers can combine inheritances to make a business while his cat is only good for eating and a muffet, cat hears this and asks his master to make him a bag and boots so that he can run around in the dirt and then he will prove his worth to the master, youngest boy notes the cats fromer cunning, gives in to cats demands, cat goes out, traps a rabbit in the bag, takes it to a king, gives it to him in the name of Master of Carabas (the youngest miller's son), goes to a field, traps partridges, does the same, again, continues for 2 or 3 months, then tells his master to go bathe in a certain part of river, king and his hot daughter take a riverside drive, Marquis follows orders, cat begins to cry help, king sees its the cat, sends guards to help, cat takes the Marquis's clothes and pretends thieves took them, the king dresses the Marquis of Carabas in his finest clothes, invites him in the carriage, daughter thinks he's hot, cat runs ahead to mowers and then reapers, threatens them with death to tell the king when he comes by that they do their work for the Marquis, they follow orders, king is impressed, cat goes ahead to a super rich ogre's castle, goes in, pays respects and asks the ogre to shapeshift into lion, cat gets scared, asks the ogre to change into a mouse, ogre stupidly does, mouse eats him, king comes past castle, cat hears him, lowers drawbridge and invites him saying it is the Marquis's castle, there is a feast there set for the ogre's friends but they dare not come bc of the king, king thinks it is for him, gets drunk, invites Marquis to become son in law, marriage, cat becomes a lord. MORAL: big inheritance is advantageous , diligence and ingenuity are worth more. OR If a miller can get a princess in a few looks, clothes and appearance and youth matter in matters of the heart.

An East Frisian Wedding Custom

Fools Ethnic Fools Germany Joke: Do you know why they always have a manure wagon at an east Frisian wedding? No. Why? To draw the flies away from the bride.

Jack and the Beanstalk

Coming of Age Boys Become Men England Poor widow has a son, he is a lazy dunce, she has to sell the cow for food, she makes Jack take it to market, he goes, meets a butcher on the way where he trades the cow for beautiful beans, takes them home, mother cries , he sows the beans at daybreak, he goes to bed hungry but wakes up in the night to see how the beans grew beyond the cliff to the sky, he called his mom, asked for permission to climb up, he climbs perseveringly, sees a beautiful land with a castle separated by a perpendicular rock from a village, old women in a red satin hat comes out, asks her about the castle, she tells him the story of a knight that was killed by a giant while he slept, killed all the babies, pregnant queen was visiting an old nurse, she gets away, grows old in the nurses home, becomes poor with her son, old lady reveals that queen is his mother and he must take the challenge to kill the giant. She says he needs to retrieve a golden hen and a harp that talks. He goes to castle, blows doorbell horn, stupid giantess grabs him and locks him in the great hall as a page servant boy for her, citing how her husband has eaten the rest, giant husband comes home with gold, falls asleep, Jack hops out and steals the gold, goes down the beanstalk and brings it home, mom is happy. Mom wants him to stay, he goes again, dumb giantess doesn't recognize him, takes him, husband giant comes home and says feefifofum i smell an englishman, wife says its cooked sheep, husband calls out the harp, it plays a sad song, merry song, then lullaby, giant sleeps, jack steals the harp but the harp screams to giant-master, giant wakes up, pursues, trips jack goes down the beanstalk, giant reaches down to pursue, jack cuts beanstalk, giant falls, breaks neck, is dead. A beautiful lady shows up, tells jack he is brave, , says to kill giantess, he says no because she was nice, fairy says go there anyway and do what you you must, she gives him a ride on a two peacock chariot, meets miserable peasants at mountain base village, fairy says Jack is the new king, they rejoice, band of men, fairy, and jack go to the castle, knock, giantess comes down the stairs frightened and too fast, trips on dress, breaks neck, dies, Jack takes back castle, buries giantess now, rights those formerly robbed, fairy tells him how selling the cow was a test and he proved himself to have an inquiring mind. Happiness, the end.

The Blood Brothers

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Europe Fisherman catches a fish that grants him a wish when he decides not to keep it, he and wife want kids, fish says cast him back in the water and feed the wife the next fish, he does, wife eats meat, dog eats insides, horse eats bones, all have twins, twin grow up, older one seeks adventure, leaves behind bottle of white wine that will turn red if he is ever killed, rides the older twin horse and takes the older twin dog, goes to a kingdom, king is giving away his daughter for whomever kills the dragon, he kills dragon, cuts tongue, kings steward comes by after, takes the dragon head, takes shortcut to kingdom, tries to claim prize, older twin points out how it has no tongue, he shows the tongue, gets bride, marriage, older twin grows restless again, goes to Forest of No Return, meets an old witch, she says hello, bc he replies she casts a spell turning him into stone, younger brother at fisherman's cove sees the wine is red, rides the younger horse and takes the younger dog to his kingdom, kingdom thinks he is the the older brother prince, is received with honor, sleeps with wife but places a sword between them (no sex), next day goes to forest, sees old woman and senses her evil, doesn't reply but jumps on her with sword to find brothers location, she yields, the witch anoints brother stone with salve, he's back to life, bros walk home talk of adventure, brother mentions he slept with older twins wife but can't explain the next part before his brother cuts off his head, goes home, sees princess, she explains she is glad it is him and not the him that put the sword between them, older twin is salty, runs back to dead brother, uses leftover salve to attach head and bring back life, happiness, the end.

The Rabbit Herd

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Europe King has a daughter who never laughs, king challenges any man to make her laugh and says they will have her as a bride, all men fail, news reached a remote kingdom where a poor peasant has three songs, the youngest is named Hans, makes the village laugh all the time, decides to go, midday he rests in the shade and and old man comes, he shares half a crust with him and the old man gives him a silver flute, he plays the flute and is magically at the kingdom and the guards let him past and the tune draws the princess out and she laughs hard. King hears this, sees Hans who is dressed like a simpleton and decides he is not worthy, sets challenges before he can get the princess, challenged to herd rabbits, rabbits are heard by his magic flute songs, king gets worried, sends the daughter to buy a rabbit, he names a price(not revealed to the text) that makes her blush, princess takes it, leaves with rabbit, he plays flute and rabbit leaps back, same sequence with the queen and king, kings deal involves a mare in a nearby field (but no more detail is said), three days later, king challenges him to fill three bags full by singing, Hans only agrees to do so in the presence of the finest lords, first through third bags come, he sings about how the king queen and princess go into the woods to try their luck, all three stop him and say the bag is full. Wedding happens that day, marriage, happiness, the end. "I was too invited, but i got lost in the woods and showed up at the last toast"

The Swineherd Who Married a Princess

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Europe Swineherd hers pigs in a forest next to the king's castle, princess comes through once day, sees him teach a pig to dance, wants to see the pig dance more 3 times, he demands and she complies to raise her skirt to her knees, waist, and then neck. Time comes to marry her off, king can't decide between all the suitors, decides whoever knows her birthmark on her belly with three golden hairs can have her, swineherd saw this when she begged him to have the pig dance. Story not over, a prince bribed an unfaithful servant to describe it to him, he does to the king. King decides two men should be in a room with the king for a night and whoever the queen faces toward in the morning is her husband. Swineherd schemes, drops laxative herb in princes evening soup and puts chocolate clumps in his pocket, night comes, king locks the men in the room with the girl, prince jumps up and has to shit, swineherd pretends he has to as well, both have no choice but to shit where they stand, prince does, swineherd drops chocolate,shitting is punishable by death, swineherd says we have to eat it, prince eats shit, swineherd eats chocolate, they go into bed, queen smells the prince, turn to swineherd all night till morning, swineherd marriage, happiness, the end.

Litte Red Cap

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Brothers Grimm Sweet girl in a village that everyone loves. Grandma gives her red cap, looks good, nickname becomes Red Cap. GMa is sick, mom says bring her cake and a bottle of wine, mother gives explicit warning not to stray off path because the wine bottle will break. Meets wolf, wolf asks where she is going, Red Cap tells him in explicit detail, he thinks about eating her, tells her to explore the beauty of the forest, she picks flowers for a long time, wolf goes ahead and eats GMa, puts on clothes, Red Cap finishes with flowers and goes to GMas, she notes how everything looks strange and she is oddly scared, gets in bed(no mention of taking clothes off), What big eyes you have, etc, big teeth...better to eat you. She gets eaten. Passing huntsman notes loud snoring of old women, investigates, its the wolf he has been hunting, he scissors open the wolfs stomach, takes of Red Cap and GMa alive, fills the wolf with stones, wolf wakes up, too heavy, dies. Little Cap says she will never go astray again. Second story element: Red Cap is on path again, meets another wolf, ignores him and goes to GMas, tells GMa, they lock up, wolf tries to get in, goes to roof, GMa and Red Cap put boiling sausage water near edge of roof, Wolf smells, falls in, drowns.

The Wild Man and the Prince

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Serbia King goes hunting, catches a wild man, puts him in a cage below the youngest prince's room, king orders whoever sets him free to be put to death, prince hears the wailing and crying of wild man all day and night and frees him, king hears no crying, looks, finds wildman set free, asks the people, son confesses, he's terrified bc he has to kill his own kid, consults course, decided on banishment, king is much happier about this alternative, sends letters of rec to foreign king, prince leaves with servants, stops for water one day, no bucket at well so servant has to hold his legs, servant threatens to drop him unless they switch places, he agrees, false prince and false servant go to foreign kingdom, false prince gets graces and honors, fears that the prince servant will rebel, tells the foreign king to release his animals to the wild to eat and that the princeservant can tame them to come back at night, releases bears, princeservant cries in woods, wildman gives him a bell to wrangle animals, repeat sequence with wolves and birds. foreign king no longer worries about food, looks for a husband for princess, princeservant has fallen in love with her, goes to woods, wildman gives him fast steed and princely clothes to win the three day three races for 3 golden apples, wins the first two, king builds a wall and the moat at end of third race to catch princeservant because he rides away, prince escapes, later, king can't find 3 apple winner, princess is in garden and see the princeservant with 3 apples, tells king, princeservant confesses his troubles and the false prince is set to death, marriage, happiness.

The Flying Ship

Coming of Age Boys Become Men Ukraine Parents have three kids, two smart older ones and a youngest simpleton, czar challenges anyone who can build a flying ship will get to marry his daughter, two eldest set out with the permission of their mother and are given white bread, meat,bacon and brandy, youngest begs to go and is ridiculed, finally nags so hard that she lets go, gives him shit black bread and bottle of water, sends him, he meets an old man, he asks if the simpleton knows how to make a flying ship, he replies no, old man asks why he goes, he says only God knows, old man tells him to sit, boy says he doesn't have much but the old man says God provides, bag is full of white rolls and water is now vodka, Old man says God loves simpletons, old man tells him to go into the woods and drive an axe into the first tree he sees and fall asleep face down, simpleton does, flying ship is created, old man says to take aboard everyone he meets while flying around, meets a man with ear on ground who hears earth, dude with leg tied to ear who can walk the earth in one stride, a gunman who can shoot a hundred miles distance, glutton with bread sack, dude who can drink a lake, wood cutter with sticks that raise an army, and guy with straw that can summon winter, they go to czar's place, czar sees they are all peasants, sets an impossible challenge for them. Tells them to find Water of life, ear leg man goes to other side of the world in two seconds, gets water, falls asleep, others are worried, ear man hears he is sleeping, gunman wakes him up with shot sound, he returns. Czar orders them to eat 12 oxen and 12 bread sacks, glutton does. Ordered to drink 40 40 gal. caskets of wine, thirsty man does. Orders them to bathe in red hot iron bath, strawman makes winter, peasant passes the test. Orders him to raise an army, peasant and stick guy go to field at night, say they will attack the czar if he refuses, czar sees army in the morning, sends grand robes and marries away the daughter, loves beyond measure, happiness, the end.

Rapunzel

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Brothers Grimm Couple can't have a kid. Live in a house with a fairy's garden out back, its off limits. Mom gets pregnant, becomes ill for demand of rapunzel flowers. Husband climbs over the wall to get them, wife grow hungrier and greedier for it. Third time the fairy catches the husband, give him rapunzel in exchange for his wife's unborn child. Child is born, fairy takes her, named Rapunzel. Locked in high tower, fairy calls out to rapunzel to let down her long hair in order to get into the tower. Prince comes along, finds out how to call her and get up. They flirt, preggers. Fairy finds out, cuts Rapunzel's hair off, sends her to the woods. Rapunzel has twin boy and girl, she lives miserably. Same night of banishing prince climbs up, fairy is there, he jumps from sadness, loses eyesight, wanders the woods for years. happens upon Rapunzel and baby's, her magic tears cure blindness, the end.

Little Briar-Rose

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Brothers Grimm King and queen wish for daughter, wife is in the tub and a crab says it will happen, baby comes, invite all the fairies to a party, they only had 12 plates for 13 fairies, fairies 1-11 give good gifts like beauty, 13th one is pissed and says a spindle prick will kill her, 12th says it will only put her to sleep, king has all spindles destroyed, years later king and queen leave for a trip, princess wanders the castle, finds a tower, goes through a yellow key door to find old woman, they chill, she lets princess try spindle, princess pricks self, she falls asleep, everyone including king and queen (who returned) the horses the cooks the maids all fall asleep, huge impenetrable thorn Briar Rose hedge grows around the castle. Princes try to penetrate, all get caught and die. One special prince shows up, the hedge opens, he finds the princess, kisses her, everyone wakes up, marriage.

The Three Spinning Women

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Brothers Grimm King loves having flax spun, makes his daughters do it all day and night, he leaves on a trip, mother replaces the three daughters with a woman w a huge lower lip from wetting, one with giant finger from twisting thread, one with wide flat foot from peddling, king comes back, repulsed by maidens, they explain their deformities and how spinning components caused them, he forbids his daughters from spinning and becoming ugly.

The Shoes That Were Danced to Pieces

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Brothers Grimm King's twelve daughters are locked in a room but somehow are dancing their shoes till they are worn, challenges suitors to stay in the locked room with them three nights and figure it out or else be decapitated, many princes get drunk and fall asleep, many decapitations, soldier comes along and old woman gives him an invisible cloak, tells him to try the challenge but not drink, he goes, doesn't drink, pretends to be asleep, princesses get ready, go to a bed that sinks underground, he follows, steps on youngest ones dress, oldest dismisses her, he snaps twigs on a silver, gold, and diamond path, again youngest sister is worried but the oldest dismisses her, then reach 12 princes in a boat, princes take the to a shiny castle, they party, invisible cloak soldier drinks, youngest sees this and is still worried, he follows them back and runs ahead to pretend to sleep, does the same nights 2 and 3 and takes goblet as more evidence, shows it to king, gets the oldest daughter, king dies, gets kingdom.

Rumpelstiltskin

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Brothers Grimm Poor miller has hot daughter, he tells the king she can turn straw into gold, king locks her in a room with straw, little old man shows up and asks for something in exchange to turn stuff into gold, she gives him a necklace, it happens, king wants more, locked in larger room, she gives little old man a ring, king wants more except now he will make her his wife, little old man wants the first child in exchange, she agrees, king marries her, they have child, old man comes to take it, gives her three days and she can keep the baby if she figures out his name, king is out hunting, sees the old mans house and hears him say his name is Rumpelstiltskin, he tells wife and she's happy, he comes back, she says his name, he goes away angry forever.

Little Red Riding Hood

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Charles Perrault Theres an exceptionally pretty girl from a village named Little Red Riding Hood, her mother makes her take cake and pot of butter to her sick grandmother. Meets a wolf along the way, wolf doesn't eat her bc wood cutters are near by, he asks her destination, she naively tells him, he says to race him to grandmas house, he rushes ahead. She takes forever and stops to pick flowers and nuts off the ground. He goes in, pretends to be Little Red, grandma lets him, he etas her. Little Red shows up, she is afraid of the wolfs harsh voice but attributes it to sickness, goes in, gets told to get undressed and get into bed: My what big.... you have. All better to ...with :sequence.... wolf eats Little Red. Moral: girls, especially pretty ones, should never talk to strangers, wolves come in all shapes and sizes.

The False Grandmother

Coming of Age Girls Become Women France Girl is taking a basket of goodies to grandmom, meets wolf, naively tells him her destination. Wolf goes ahead, eats grandmother and saves a bucket of blood and a piece of flesh. Girl shows up, is invited in, wolf tells her to eat, she drinks blood and eats the meat unknowingly, he tells her to get in bed with him, she agrees. She notices its not grandma, says she has to shittt, wolf lets her go to the privy, she runs away. the end

Sun Moon and Talia

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Giambattista Basile King has a daughter, calls for wise men to tell her future, they predict flax splinter will end her, he bans flax, she sees a woman spinning, touches the flax and it goes under her nail, old woman spinning freaks out and runs around, shes frozen dead, dad is sad, puts her in a mansion, one day a king hunting finds her, bangs her, he leaves, 9 months later she has two kids Sun and Moon, fairies help guide them to her nipple, one day one baby sucks the splinter of flax from her finger, shes awake, meanwhile king remembers her, comes back, is overjoyed, they're BFFs, he goes home, wife suspects something, he calls Talia's name in her sleep, she interrogates the secretary, he tells her about Talia, she sends for the kids to be cooked, cook hides the kids, king eats lamb instead, gets pissed at queen, goes away, queen invites Talia to palace, bitches her out, lights a pyre to burn her, king comes back, burns the queen and secretary, cooks reveals kids, happiness, marriage.

The Princess and the Pea

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Hans Christian Andersen Prince searches for a real princess, fails, one shows up wet from the rain at night, old queen preps a bed with a pea under it, 20 mattresses and 20 featherbeds above it, princess sleeps, wakes up, bitches about how she slept on something so hard she couldn't rest, proves herself a real princess because she is so sensitive, marriage, the end.

Tatterhood

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Norway King and queen want a kid, queen runs around complaining about it, they adopt, the adopted kid plays with an apple and a beggar's kid comes by, they become friends, mom calls the daughter up to her, tells her not to be friends with beggars, beggar kid says she wouldn't be such a bitch if she knew her mom's powers, queen presses for answers, kid says she can get her a child, calls up beggar woman, she denies it, kid says to get old woman drunk, queen does, woman tells her to wash herself with two buckets of water, throw it under the bed, two flowers show up, pretty one and ugly black, she's only supposed to eat pretty one, eats both, has two kids, ugly Tatterhood who rides a goat and has a spoon , supper pretty twin sister. One Christmas night theres a loud noise, its witches and trolls making ruckus, Tatterhood goes out to fight them away, pretty twin pops head out, head gets stolen, replace with a cow head, she acts like a cow, Tatterhood asks for a ship w no sailors, sails to witch land with sister, rides goat to witch house, steals sister's head back while fighting witches, goes to strange kings land, tells messengers to send the king, king comes, wants to marry the pretty twin, Tatterhood only says he can if Tatter gets the prince, king agrees, prince is miserable after wedding, makes him ask about the goat, goat becomes horse, same with wooden spoon, spoon becomes silver fan, hood becomes gold crown, face becomes even prettier than pretty twin's, prince happy, they go home, everyone happy. the end

Habitrot

Coming of Age Girls Become Women Scotland Woman has a lazy daughter who never spins yarn, beats the daughter but the daughter doesn't care, gives daughter 3 yarns to spin in 3 days, girls is upset and goes to a grassy knoll. Sees Habitrot on a rock, she is an old woman with disfigured lips from wetting string, she agrees to do the spinning, girl sleeps, wakes, up, looks for yarn, sees the Habitrot and ugly ladies in a rock spinning, girl goes home, eats, sleeps, the perfect yarn is there in the morning, mom yells how impressed she is, prince hears, marries her bc he wants a good spinner, he wants to see her spin, Habitrot comes to help, invites the couple to see the operation, they go into a tree stump, see all the ugly women there and how spinning distorted lips and made them ugly, husband says she never has to spin, lets all the spinning get done by Habitrot.

The Twelve Huntsmen

Courtship and Marriage Abandoned Women Brothers Grimm Prince an princess fall in love, he gives her a ring, he is called back to his kingdom to see his dying father, father arranged a wedding, prince takes it, forgets other girl, she wait, gets 11 ladies in waiting and they set out as huntsman, accepted into princes court, prince tests to see if they are women by placing peas on the floor, they do not avoid and trample them so they are men, next times places spinning wheels which attract women in front of them, each time the women know of the test and do the manly thing. Go hunting, wedding party is heard, original princess faint and prince sees the ring, he remembers his love for her, explains to other bride about the old key instead of the new key analogy, she agrees, her and 11 ladies in waiting and prince live happily ever after.

The Frog King or Iron Heinrich

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Brothers Grimm Princess is playing with a golden ball by a well, she throws it too high and it goes in, frog promises to retrieve it if only she agrees to let him sit next to her, eat from her plate, and love him as a companion, she simply agrees without thought, leaves the frog in the well, later during meal a knock on the door is heard, it is the frog, she slams the door in his face, tells kings why she is afraid, frog yells why, he makes her honor the commitment, frog comes in, sits next to her, eats from her plate, she has to take him to her room, she resists but is commanded by the king to comply, she cries and gets angry, throws the frog against the wall, prince transforms, they sleep together with pleasure. Next morning the prince's Heinrich shows up with 8 horse golden carriage, he was saddened by his prince's transformation into a frog so he wrapped his heart with iron to prevent it from bursting, prince and princess go a short distance, his heart has cracking and is free now that his master is better, happiness, the end.

Sweetheart Roland

Courtship and Marriage Abandoned Women Brothers Grimm Stepdaughter and a mother and her true daughter, the mother hates the stepdaughter because she is fair, daughter wants her nice apron, tells her to sleep on the wall side of the bed for she would chop off the stepdaughter's head in the night, stepdaughter hears this, switches bed sides, mother comes in and chops her own daughter's head off, stepD goes to Sweetheart Roland's house, they plan to leave, she takes mother's wand and takes the head and drops blood outside the door, in the kitchen, and in the bedroom. Mother wakes up in the morning, each blood drop calls her and says her daughter is there, eventually sees the accident, puts on seven-league boots in pursuit, she is also a witch, girl uses wand to change herself into a lake and her Roland into a duck, woman fails at luring duck over with bread, leaves, they go, witch comes back at daybreak, stepdaughter turns into flower in a thorn hedge, Roland is a violinist, old woman hears the music played as she goes into the hedge, can't help dancing and is torn to pieces by thorns, dies, Roland and girl plan wedding, Roland goes homes and forgets her and she turns into a flower, shepherd takes her home, she sneaks and does all his housework during the day, wise woman tells him to catch her, he stays home, throws white sheet on her, transforms into human form, shepherd asks for marriage, she says no, goes to Roland who is about to be married, breaks off wedding, original couple married, happy, simple ending.

The Mastermaid

Courtship and Marriage Abandoned Women Norway King has several sons, the youngest is restless and is granted leave to travel, he goes to a giant, an easy master, giant makes him clean the stables and allows him to rest for the remainder of the day as long as he not look into any rooms beside his own, he goes into the rooms, first has a fireless boiling pot that turns a lock of hair copper, the next room silver, the next gold, and the last a maiden who tells him that he must clean the stable with the back of the pitchfork handle upside down, they chat and decide to get married, he leaves to do the task before giant gets home, giant says he must have seen the Mastermaid, plays dumb, next day same sequence except he must wrangle a fire breathing horse, she tells him to use a bit behind the door, talk until she reminds him to do the task, does it, plays, dumb, final task is to get fire tax from hell, goes to Mastermaid, tells him to go to cliff, fire guy will come out and he should ask for all that he can carry, he does, its good he asks only for all his arms could carry, gets tons of gold and silver in sacks, goes home, plays dumb, giant finally agrees to show him the Mastermaid tomorrow. He tells the maid to cut the princes throat and cook him, he naps, she cuts the princes finger for three drops of blood, she throws rags and clothes into the pot, they steal gold salt flask of water golden apple and two golden chickens and then run away, the blood drops speak and stall the giant, he wakes up, pursues, stopped by river, has river sucker take it up, sees prince and maid on the sea in a ship, they throw salt and it becomes a mountain, he gets a hill borer to tunnel through, sucker was about to suck them up when they throw the flask of water, it becomes a sea, they reach land, escape, prince decides to go home ahead and get the horses and carriage, she begs him not to go, he insists, she tells him to go and ignore everyone and eat nothing or else he will forget her, he goes, brother is getting married, ignores wedding party and food, almost finished when bride's sister rolls and apple to him, he eats it, forgets, agrees to marry the bride's sister, meanwhile the Mastermaid sees a hut with an old disgusting woman, convinces her to stay in there, cleans up the hut, throws gold in fire and the hut turns gold, old lady runs out but crushes her head on the stoop and dies, constable comes by next morning and sees the hut, wants to marry the maid, brings gold, she tricks him into poking the fire before bed, he does, rakes hot coals over himself al night when he tells her he has the poker, runs away in the morning, clerk comes, brings gold, tricked into closing the door, opens and closes the door violently all night, runs away, sheriff, brings gold, brings in calf, stuck on tale and travels the world on the third day, all leave the gold. 4th day the prince wedding is supposed to happen, they try leaving but the harness pin, carriage bottom, and horses fail, the constable clerk sheriff recommend the things that they got stuck to, wedding, at dinner he sends for the Mastermaid to thank her for her help, she demands he come to her, sits in her hut at the table, pulls out the golden apple and the golden hen and chicken which fight, he remembers, the spell is broken, witch bride sister who rolled the apple is tied to a horse and dragged to pieces, wedding, all dance.

Cupid and Psyche

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Apuleius King and queen has three daughter, two older ones are regular amount of hot, youngest is super hot and people throw themselves at her feet so much that Venus herself loses worshippers, jealousy from the goddess venus ensues, she tries to send her son Cupid to kill her, he brings water of from both the bitter and sweet waters, goes to Psyche's chambers, bitters her mouth, regrets it , touches her with his arrow healing her, she sees him and he is startled, gets wounded by own arrow, she's saved. Venus is still pissed at Psyche, her sisters get married off and Psyche can't seem to get married, parents consult the oracle of Apollo and he says she is destined to marry a monster, she agrees to go, gets let on a mountain and a Zephyr takes her to a magical golden palace, her suitor waits on her but is never seen, very Cinderella like, she enjoys his company, he refuses to be seen, she misses her family after a while, secret lover allows them to visit, she lies to the sister's and says she has seen the lover, they hear the truth, they convince her that he is just fattening her up to eat him so she should conceal a lamp and knife and kill him in his sleep, family leaves, she goes to and finds handsome Cupid asleep, oil from lantern falls on him and injures him, he flies away and she falls out of a window chasing him, he leaves. Sisters think now that he will choose one of them, they go to the mountain and get dropped and die, Psyche wanders and wanders until she happens upon Ceres temple and she cleans up the place, Ceres tells her about winning Venus' approval, tells her to go to Venus and be apologetic, she does, Venus institutes her first test, makes her sort shittonnes of wheat and beans and stuff, Cupid summons an ant army to help her, Venus is pissed when she returns and throws her black bread for supper, next morning she is told to go get shiny gold fleece from sheep on a bank, goes, river God is nice and tells her to wait until the water calms and the sheep go away to collect the wool that's caught on tree bark, succeeds, goes to Venus who tells her to go get some beauty in a box from Proserpine, she rage quits and cries, voice encourages her with instructions, goes avoids road dangers, past black river with Charon, past Cerberus three-headed dog and to Pluto's kingdom, eats black bread and takes no feast offer, gets beauty in a box, gets curios, opens it up, gets into Stygian sleep and she is paralyzed. Cupid recovers and sneaks away to revive her with his arrow, she return with the box for Venus and is given immortality potion to drink, marriage, daughter named Pleasure.

The Little Donkey

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Brothers Grimm King and queen can't have a kid, she complains she is like a field that can't grow anything, God intervenes and gives them a donkey boy, king embraces him as God's gift, says he will sit on his throne and be the heir to the kingdom, litt donkey becomes an expert flute player, one day sees himself in the well and is saddened, he goes to a kingdom to a king with one daughter, is let in because he is a musician donkey, all laugh at him, he is placed to eat with the servants, but since he is nobility he is sat with the king, gets seated next to the king's beautiful daughter, donkey stays with the king a while but grows sad, denies kings offers for gold, precious things, or a half of a kingdom, accepts marriage to daughter, marriage, couple goes to bedroom, king hides a servant in there to see if he behaves, donkey throws off skin and reveals he's a handsome lad, wife is really in love and happy, next time king asks how she likes the donkey as a husband, he is surprised by her enthusiastic response, then hears the servant's report, next night has a fire built and he hides, he burns the skin, donkey wakes up in the morning and says he must leave because he is terrified and sad, king offers him half the kingdom and gets him to stay, donkey gets his half, king dies and gets his half, his dad king dies and gets another full kingdom, happiness, the end.

The Frog Prince

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Brothers Grimm King has three daughters, hot summer day, eldest goes to well with supposedly clear water but finds in her glass that it is cloudy, frog pops up and says if she will love him then he will make it clear, she denies him, same sequence with second oldest daughter, youngest daughter agrees thinking a frog won't follow through, one night the frog scratches at the door and calls out to remind her of the promise, he sleeps at her feet, this happens the second night, third night he sleeps under her pillow and she says this will be the last time, she wakes up to find a prince who says her three night love removed the spell on him, sisters are jealous and mad, marriage, happiness, the end.

Hans-My-Hedgehog

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Brothers Grimm Parents are desperate for a kid, dad is pissed and says he would take a hedgehog for a kid, that happens, the hedgehog lays behind the stove for 8 years, one day a fair comes to town, father leaves, asks the maiden what she wants and asks the half boy half hedgehog Hans what he wanted, she wanted slippers and fancy stockings and he wanted bagpipes, dad got them, he told his dad he wanted him to go to the blacksmith and have his rooster shod and then he shall go away forever, dad complies happily, Hans goes into the forest and plays bagpipes in the trees on his rooster while he tends the pigs and donkeys he brought. King gets lost in his woods one day and sends a servant to ask him what he is doing in the tree, requires the king's promise of giving Hans the first thing that greets him in his kingdom once he shows the lost king the way out of the woods, gets written consent, goes home, daughter is first to greet him and he tells her all about what happened, he wrote down that he wouldn't promise him anything since Hans can't read, Another king comes by, same thing but with a sincere promise, the daughter loves the father and consents to being given to Hans. Time goes by and Hans eventually tends the pigs till the forest is full of the,, tells his father he is coming home and bringing all the pigs, dad is sad, big slaughter happens, has his father shod his rooster a second time, agrees to leave forever, dad is happy. Hans goes to first kingdom, king says to kill anyone with bagpipes on a rooster, Hans evades them, goes to the king, murder threatens the king for his trickery, gets the daughter, horses, servants, and riches. Stabs the daughter with quills a while down the road and throws her back. Next kingdom, Hans is welcomed royally, daughter is sad but goes, the two lay down into bed, king lights a large fire, Hans sheds his skin and becomes man, kingsmen burn the skin, Hans is charcoal black, king gets doctors to wash him white, marriage happiness, years later go back to dad, dad rejoices at son's fully human non-hedgehog-torso, brings dad to his kingdom.

The Clinking Clanking Lowesleaf

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Germany King has three daughters, he loves the youngest the most, he goes to the market and asks what they want, the oldest wants a golden spinning wheel and the middle wants golden yarn reel, the third wants a clinking clanking Lowesleaf, king finds all except the leave and goes home through a forest, he comes upon a large birch tree with a black poodle underneath who asks him what he wants, in exchange for the first thing that greets him when the king get home the dog gives the king the desired leaf, king thinks his own dog will be the first thing to greet him and the poodle will come in a year and a day for nothing, he goes home, youngest daughter meets him first, he pushes her aside and she is confused, he cries and grieves for an entire year, finally tells the queen the issue, the queen proposes dressing up and giving away the goose herder's daughter, they dog scratches at the gate, they dress of the goose daughter and the dog takes her away on his tail, they go to the woods under the birch tree of truth, girl says her dad could use these fields for the geese, dog discovers the truth, he is pissed, goes back, queen dresses up the broom binder's daughter even more beautifully, he takes her, she reveals herself by saying her dad would love to use these twigs, goes back, everyone is crying, hands over the princess, he takes her deeper into a hut in the forest in which no one can leave but she is provided everything, she sees deer outside, wishes that even if an old woman would come she would love her, old woman appears, says the poodle is a prince, the hut a castle, the animals people, she just needs to deny the dog from entering her room three nights in a row, the third night she must build a fire and throw his hide in there, she does so, everything turns into a castle and kingdom, at marriage her family is there, she says old tongues old lungs three times like the old woman told her to, she shows up, sisters and old queen scorn her, princess lets her eat and drink from her plate and cup, old queen and sisters become lame and crooked, he becomes 7 times more beautiful, happiness, the end.

Zelinda and the Monster

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Italy Poor man with three daughters, the older two had evil envy toward the most beautiful and civil and favorite of the father's daughter who was the youngest, fair comes and oldest Rosina wanted a dress, middle Marietta sks for a shawl, Zelinda the youngest asked for a rose, man goes, gets two items the easiest but can't get the rose, comes upon a walled garden with an open gate and picks a rose, dragon beast comes and demands his life, then demands directly for Zelinda, he goes home and gives the oldest girls their presents and tells Zelinda about what happened, the oldest blame and yell viciously at her, she calmly agrees to go, father and her go, come across a palace and marble statues lead them into the a dinner, two take them to bed, invisible hand makes breakfast, they go to the garden, Beast shows up, she's terrified, old man goes, Dragon is civil and caresses her and asks Do you love me Will you be my wife everyday, she always responds I like you but no wife. He says great things happen if you become my wife, she continues to shut his ass down, one day he said if she doesn't consent to marriage her dad will die, shows her magic mirror in which her dad is on his deathbed, she consents to save her father, he transforms into handsome youth in two lines, son of King of the Oranges, witch changed hi,, condemned to hide in rosebush till girl consents to become his wife, ends at that explanation. way shorter.

Beauty and the Beast

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Marie LePrince de Beaumont Very rich merchant has three daughters, the two oldest are lazy bitches, youngest is the prettiest and reads books, oldest girls reject all men who aren't dukes or earls and youngest Beauty denies the men politely because she is too young for marriage, father suddenly loses his whole fortune and the two oldest daughters do not take the move to the country well, youngest daughter diligently adapts to country work. Year into poverty the man receives word some riches arrived by ship, the two oldest daughters ask for dresses and ribbons to be bought by the dad, the youngest knows its bad to waste so she asks only for a rose, father goes, all his money is lost, on the way back 30 miles near home, goes through forest, wolves are around him, he comes upon an empty palace, wait till 11 to eat but finally eats chicken and wine, is very polite yelling thanks, finds a bed and sleeps in it, finds clothes in the morning, chocolate for breakfast, leaves through rose garden, takes rose, Beast comes out, asks for his life, takes the daughter as an exchange, father goes home only to see his daughters and doesn't expect a replacement, is given treasure chest of riches, comes home, Beauty insists out of love for her father to go for him, he goes to bed worried about hiding riches and keeping oldest daughters married, wicked sisters fake tears saying goodbye to Beauty, Beauty is the only not to cry bc she is happy to help, they go, go into great hall, dad is super sad, Beauty politely eats, Beast terrifies her in person, dad leaves, she finds "Beauty's Apartment" full of riches, she gets everything she wants, she lives and talks with the Beast at dinners, at first dinner he asks her to marry him, she says no politely, he runs away crying, three months go by and she grows content with his company but misses home, gets permission to leave, puts ring on table, goes home, happy, sisters try to get her eaten and make her stay longer, at day ten she has a dream of the Beast dying from sadness of missing her, she returns, Beast isn't there for 9 oclock dinner, looks for him, remembers from the dream that he is in the garden, he is dying, she agrees to be his wife, fireworks and bright lights, Beast is transformed into a handsome prince, he aws cursed by wicked fairy, spell broken by virgin consent, lady in her dream comes and tells her she will be a queen, her whole family is in the great hall, lady dream voice turns the sister's into conscious stone to watch Beauty's happiness, fairy strokes wand, transported to the prince's dominion, marriage, happiness, the end.

East of the Sun and West of the Moon

Courtship and Marriage Animal Bridegrooms Norway Poor peasant has three daughter, youngest is the most beautiful, one extremely stormy thursday a white bear taps on the window three times and offers to make the peasant as rich as he is currently poor in exchange for his daughter, he tells the bear to come back next thursday for the final decision, he convinces the daughter, she agrees, the bear come on thursday to take her, she rides on his back and is not afraid, they come to a castle on a large steep cliff, gold and silver, she gets a silver bell that fulfils her requests, rings bell and goes into sweet bedroom to sleep, each night a man crawls into bed, sleeps, wakes up before she sees him. She gets homesick, bear allows her to go to see her family on the condition that she doesn't talk to her mother alone in a closet, she agrees, rides his back to the rich peasants new house, everyone is happy to see her, she tells them her story except for the man sleeping part, is lured into the room by her mother breaking her promise, tells her, she gives the daughter a candlestick to light at night to see if its a troll and she is warned not to drip any tallow on him, she goes back, bear asks if she broke any promises, she lies, late at night she lights the candle, see the man, falls in love with him but drops three tallow drops on him, he is pissed, says if only she would have made it a year she would have broken the bear curse his stepmother placed on him, now he has to go to the castle east of the sun and west of the moon to marry a 3 yard long nose girl, she cries, in the morning the castle is gone and she is in a field. She gets over crying, goes to a high cliff and meets a lady, she doesn't know where the castle is but sends her to two more sisters who each give her a golden apple, golden comb, and golden spinner and allow her to take a horse that she switches on the ear to return, final old lady sends her to the east wind who sends her to the west then south then north, north is a big jerk but takes her super far the the caste east of the sun west of the moon, gets there, ugly princess sees her playing with each of the gifts and gets them in exchange for a night with the prince, prince is always too asleep and the girls cries for nothing, before the third time the Christian neighbors tell the prince a girl is heard crying in his room, prince decides to reject his fiance's drink which is revealed to be sleeping potion, he sees his wife, the wedding is tomorrow, he plans to have a wife test in which only his current wife can clean the 3 drops of tallow from his shirt and the troll wife can't because she isn't christian, day comes, the more the troll wife tries to clean the shirt the more it becomes black, "beggar girl" who is the true wife is asked to clean it, cleans it wife, the old troll mother explodes in rage, same with nose princess, the prince and and princess escape and fly away with all the freed Christians there.

The Frog's Skin

Courtship and Marriage Animal Brides Georgia Three brothers determine what they will marry by shooting arrows into the air, two older brother's had arrows land on nobleman's' home and are married to humans, the youngest had his arrow land in a lake and he is thus married to a frog, frog just sits all day on the fireplace while the wives do the work, sister in law's try to sweep away the frog but the youngest brother brings it back in citing his commitment to hit, his oldest brothers cast him out and with the frog, he grows sad, one day comes back from labor to see that his sideboard was replenished, tables set, dishes prepared. He only sees the frog, next day he spies and sees a hot maiden take off the frog skin and do work, third day he tries to sneak in and throw her skin into the fire, she warns him not to burn it, he does anyway, short time a lord tries to steal his girl, tells him to make a barn full of wheat in a day or his wife is stolen, he complains to wife, she tells him to go to the lake and yell Mother Father and ask for bullocks, bullocks do the work, king challenges him again to harvest the hay, complains to wife, she makes him go to the lake, Mother Father, he gets jackdaws to do his work, one is late because of an injury, third challenge is to go to the underworld and get the lord's late mother's ring, he cries, wife, Mother Father, lake gives him a ram, they go to underworld and pass three people (couple falling off a bullock skin, couple happy on an axe handle, old man whose beard is so long his cow pastures on it) goes past wall of fire, sees sad woman on gold throne, she gives him a casket not to be opened until he gives it to lord, leaves underworld and learns the beard cow guy was a dick who let his sheep eat on others pastures and he loved nobody but himself in live, the couple on the axe handle loved each other too well, the bullock skin couple hated each other in life, exit the underworld, go to lord, give him casket, run, casket opens up flames and kills the lord, long happy marriage, the end.

The Swan Maidens

Courtship and Marriage Animal Brides Joseph Jacobs Hunter trapping ducks sees 7 swan women decloak and derobe to bathe in a lake, he steals the youngest's robe and they other fly away without her, he makes her marry him and they are happy and have two kids, he hides the feather robe, one day the kids play hide and seek and the daughter finds and gives the robe to the mother and she flies away telling the daughter that her father can find her in the Land East of Sun and West of Moon, he sets out to find wife, finds old man on the ground, helps him out, tells old man story, asks him if he knows the location, man is King of Beasts, he summons them, asks, no one knows, he goes the King of Birds, no one knows, goes to King of Fishes, dolphin says its on the top of Crystal Mountain, hunter goes, sees two dudes quarreling over whether the younger or older gets to decide over invisibility hat or magic flying shoes, he tells them to race to the tree and whoever wins decides, they go, he steals the stuff, and wishes himself the the Land East of Sun West of the Moon, finds king, asks for wife, he says you can have her if you identify her, takes all the 7 girls by hand, finds wife by sew marks left on her hand from sewing the kids clothing, go home, long happy marriage, the end.

The Mermaid Wife

Courtship and Marriage Animal Brides Shetland Islands Dude from Unst sees mermen and mermaids dancing on a creek inlet, they flee and get their seal skins and return to the sea, he is stepping on one, hides it, he sees a mermaid on the shore and makes her his wife seeing as she sees no other option, they have two kids, she is cold in response to his undying love, she goes and talks to a large seal a lot, kids are playing one day and one finds the seal skin under a corn stack, gives it to mother, she runs away, husband runs to get her, sees her change, large other seal shows up and the wife converses, she goes, catches his eye, yells farewell but I have always loved my first husband more.

The Seven Wise Men of Buneyr

Fools Ethnic Fools India 7 wise mean of Buneyr depart on journey to find riches, they rest and decide to count off to make sure they were all there, they all counted but forgot to count themselves so they assumed someone was missing, shepherd comes by and helps out, they say he found the lost comrade and they offer free months labor, he sets one to keep the flies from his mother and another to tend to goats, in effort to get rid of the flies one throws a rock at a fly landed on the mother's face, kills her, the other sees the goats chewing and thinks they are mocking him so he decapitates them with an ax, the other guys ask for their turn to do work and the shepherd says they have done enough and they leave.

The Baneyrwal and the Thief

Fools Ethnic Fools India Little Baneyrwal boy sees his reflection in the tub and tells his mother that he sees a boy begging for bread, she tells father, he sees his reflection and thinks it is an old villain thief, he throws a stone in the tub, can't see reflection in the disturbed water, says the thief is cunning and won't be coming back.

The Baneyr Man and the Mill

Fools Ethnic Fools India dude goes to Indus and kisses sharp stones thinking it is God, cuts face.

The Foolish German

Fools Ethnic Fools Russia German boss doesn't understand Russian holy days and saints, makes them work , they decide to trick him, tell him that it is Saint Hornet's day, he says show him the Saint, they take him to a hollow tree with bees in it, they say he is drunk in there, German says he is not afraid of them, bees sting the hell out of him, he gives them the day and the week off out of fear.

The Barber's Tale of His Fifth Brother

Fools More Fools 1001 Nights Father dies, fifth brother gets 100 dirhams and invests it in glassware, begins day dream sequence, thinks of selling glass for money for more glass for house with slaves and eunuchs and then marry the Prime Minister's daughter who he can take by force is she refuses to consent, he will ignore her on the wedding night and the mother will beg for him to love the daughter seeing as she is a virgin and he will deny that and the maiden will bring him wine that he refuses to drink and she will press it to his face at which point he will kick her and punch her face, leg catches tray of glassware, all capital and profit is lost.

The Man, the Boy, and the Donkey

Fools More Fools Aesop Man and son walking alongside a donkey to the market, man mocks them for not riding it, the son rides it, another mocks the boy for being youthful and not letting his father ride, the father gets on and the boy walks, another mocks them for the father making the son walk, they both ride the donkey, one person mocks them for overloading the donkey, they tie the donkey's feet to a pole and carry the donkey, they get laughed at, reacha bridge, donkey kicks outs, boy falls, donkey falls over the bridge and drowns. Moral: try to please everyone and you will please no one.

The Milkmaid and Her Pail

Fools More Fools Aesop Pail on maids head, she dreams how she will make butter from milk, sell the milk for to buy eggs, hatch them to produce chicken, have a large poultry farm, make money for a dress, do to the fair, deny the hot looks of guys, toss her head at them, she does, pail falls. Moral: Do not count your chickens before they are hatched.

The Gardener and the Bear

Fools More Fools Bidpai Lonely flower and fruit tree gardener goes to seek a friend, finds a bear, they have a great friendship, he feeds the bear and while the gardener naps the bear swats away the flies, one time a fly would not go away and the bear went into a rage and threw a rock into his face killing him. Moral: Better to have a wise enemy than a foolish friend.

The Poor Man and the Flask of Oil

Fools More Fools Bidpai Poor man lives next to a rich merchant who sells oil and honey, nice merchant sends his neighbor a flask of oil that the poor man puts on a top shelf above his head. Man thinks about selling to oil for sheeps that will multiply that would grow to a flock that he could sell for riches to marry a wife and to have a young boy who he would love, he thinks that if he has a boy who disobeys him he would hit him with his staff, raises staff and knocks oil off and all over himself.

Peter Ox

Fools More Fools Denmark Farmer and his wife lament on how they have no children to bequeath their farm to, they get richer and richer and still no heir, they see that Peter their ox is pretty smart so they decide to go to the sexton to see if he will teach it to talk so that it could inherit the land, they go, the sexton looks around and sees no one is there, he decides to trick the couple saying they must tell no one and the teaching requires a hundred dollars for expensive rare books, week goes by and the farmer gives him another $100 for the books, another week and more money and this time the farmer asks what has been taught, he says the ox only says Ma, farmer takes this as a sign he needs mead, sexton takes the mead, same thing next week, span of weeks of weeks go by and the sexton kills the fat calf and sells the meat, farmer comes and he says in his absence Peter learned to talk and wanted to see his parents, they left by the sexton forget his walking stick at home, left and came back and Peter was gone, he says he will ask in church sunday if anyone has seen him, next day reads the paper and sees a merchant in town arrived named Peter Ox, goes to parents saying it might be Peter, wife offers huge sack of money for their 'son' to start his business, farmer goes to town and pretends to be the merchant's father, wakes merchant up and he thinks the farmer is crazy so he complies, pretends that he is the farmer and the merchant turned into a cow, asks him to come home and inherit the farm and if he wants money, dumps huge bag onto the table, merchant plays along since he has the same red hair as the ox and wants the money, tells merchant to call him father, merchant agrees and gets to keep the money and all the inherited possessions, wife tells the farmer to give the sexton the hundred dollar refund for fake textbooks, farmer and wife sell the farm and move in with the merchant in town, happily ever after.

Lawyer and Doctor

Fools More Fools Egypt Man has two sons, one was a thief and the other a murderer, neighbor says take them to school, one becomes a lawyer and the other a doctor.

The Fool's Good Fortune

Fools More Fools Georgia 3 brothers, one fool, the other two smarter, they divide up inheritance which is cattle, there are three gates in the barn and the last of which is very narrow, they divide the cattle leaving the fool whatever passes through the third gate, he guts a young bull, takes it to the woods and ties it to a tree and then wanders for 3 days, he comes back and ses the bull pulled up a tree and underneath was a jar of gold coins, he decides to give it to the king, along the way wayfarers take gold and replace it with stones so the fool doesn't know, goes to king, gets and audience and dumps out rocks, king is pissed, courtiers beat him, guy in crowd says "you labor in vain", he leaves and passes peasants reaping and says that, they beat him saying you should say "God give you a good harvest", says this at funeral and told to say "Heaven rest your soul", says this at a wedding and beaten to say "Be fruitful and multiply", says this at a monastery and is beaten, steals their bell as revenge, hangs it high in a forest tree, rings it bunch, band of thieves hiding loot hear it and are scared, they send a scout, ask who is in the tree, fool knows it thieves and says offer your tongue so i can mark on it what i am, thief climbs and sticks tongue out, he cuts it off, screams and runs back to flee with his band of thieves, he finds their booty in the morning, becomes richer than both brothers, builds a palace for him, me and you, come party.

The Emperor's New Clothes

Fools More Fools Hans Christian Andersen There is a king who is obsessed with clothing so much that he had a change of clothes for every hour of the day, two swindlers come to town and offer to create him clothing of material so fine that it can't be seen by fools, he pays them, they ask for gold silk and pretend to work, he sends the old minister who can't see it but pretends in order to not be unworthy of his position, he reports back and the swindlers ask for more silk and gold, more officials sent who lie about seeing the material, it is proposed he wear it to the grand procession, swindlers stay up all night burning sixteen candles pretending, they pretend dress the naked king, dudes in charge of holding the usually existent train pretend, everyone in the city does not want to look dumb so they praise the king, one kid yells he is naked, other people realize and start yelling it, the king ignores them and continues even though he knows they are right.

The Two Weavers and the Grasshoppers

Fools More Fools India Tow weavers go hunting in a field, huge grasshopper lands on the shoulder of the friend, one cries there he is and the other shoots him through the heart.

The Traveler and the Farmer

Fools More Fools North America Traveler walks by and stops to ask a farmer how long till the next town, farmer says idk can't say, man walks, farmer shouts about an hour, man is like why tell me now, he replies b/c i didn't know how fast you walked.

The Mosquito and the Carpenter

Fools More Fools The Jataka Tales Moral: Sense-lacking friends who are worse than foes with sense; Witness the son that sought the gnat to slay, but cleft, poor fool, his father's skull in two.

The Broken Pot

Fools More Fools The Panchatantra Poor man named "Luckless by his very nature" begs and gets enough rice and gruel to eat, has a leftover amount in a pot nailed over his bed, he stares at it and thinks how if a famine came her would sell it for silver for goats that would multiply for cattle for buffalo for horses for gold for a palace for a Brahman to come give him a wife for him to marry and have a kick who will climb from his lap and too close to horses hoofs when his wife will not grab the baby and he will shout and kick her, his thought ends when (consumed by fantasy) he kicks the gruel from above him and it spills all over him. Moral: He who dreams will find himself lying covered in gruel.

The King's New Turban

Fools More Fools Turkey Guy comes and offers the king a turban so fine that a bastard wedlock baby cannot see it, king pays for it, the trickster gives him an empty package and in order not to appear a bastard to his viziers and nobles said that he loved it, even let the trickster wind it, king recedes to private room, viziers say they don't see it, king realizes it is a trick.

The Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Aesop Wolf is having trouble eating sheep due to vigilance of shepherd and his dogs, finds a sheepskin one day, wears it, roams among the sheep, the lamb belonging to the sheep follows him, he leads it away from the flock and eats it, this method succeeds for some time. MORAL: Appearances are deceptive.

The Bull, the Donkey, and the Husbandman

Husband and Wife Wife Beaters 1001 Nights Allah gives this guy the gift to understand all languages of animals, must not tell anyone or die, hears the bull complaining to the donkey how he has it made and his life sucks, donkey tells the bull to play sick, man understands, next day the bull pretends sick, the farmer makes the donkey to the work, donkey nearly dies from exhaustion, donkey decides to tell the bull he should be healthy or else he might be butchered, man visits the bull, bull puts on big display of health, man laughs, wife incessantly asks why, he decides to tell her and accept death, rooster mates with his hens, the dog yells at him for doing this while the master is going to die, rooster says he handles 40 hens no problem, dog asks what master should do, he says whip the wife with a mulberry branch, man hears this, does so, wife is obedient, husbandman learns discipline from his cock, happily ever after.

The Language of Beasts

Husband and Wife Wife Beaters Andrew Lang Shepherd saves a snake from being consumed in a field fire, snake coils around his neck and tells him to go to the King of Snakes and ask for reward to be able to speak the language of beasts, they go, they snake whistles and they get passage through an archway of snakes, reach the king, he asks for the language, he gets it but is warned he will die if anyone is told about it, he agrees, goes home and hears two crows ask if the shepherd knew that under the flock of sheep there is a vault of silver and gold whether or not he would go for it, he tells his master about it who brings a cart, master gives him all the gold, he is richest man in countryside with house and animals,one day before christmas he lets his shepherds chill and eat and he watches the flock, hears wolves and the dogs conspiring to eat the sheep together, oldest dog says he will kill them all and be faithful to the master, man orders all except the old dog to be killed, heads home on horse with his wife on a donkey, donkey is riding further back, horse asks why, donkey says because the mistress is a fat füU/ck, man laughs, she incessantly asks why, he prepares to die and tell her , lies in a coffin in front of the house, old dog comes up, tells wife to give him bread, dog won't eat it, rooster comes by and eats it, dogs yells at him, rooster says man should die since he handles 100 roosters who don't complain at all lest he peak the š$hit out of them, man hears this and beats his wife with a stick, teaches her discipline, the end.

The Wife Who Would Not Be Beaten

Husband and Wife Wife Beaters India Rich raja only takes a wife that he can beat daily, gets that wife, hesitates to beat her, she says his power only comes from his father's wealth and that in order for him to beat her he needs to earn his own wealth, he does very well and comes upon the raja of Lutia, that guy asks if he knows the secret of prosperity for ever of for a day, he says forever, all his riches and retainers are stolen, only thing that stays with him is a servant spy told by the princess to steal his loin cloth that he throws away and give it to her, being poor he works for a rich Hindu, all he wears is a loin cloth, he throws one away and the servant takes it to the princess who stores it, she hears of the husband's fate and goes to Lutia bringing only a shawl and a mouse, responds with prosperity for a day, gest audience with the raja who collects all the elephants and prince's former retainers, says whoever his cat jumps to gets the wealth, she uncovers the mouse and the cat jumps to her, she gets the wealth of her husband on horses and elephants and her husband's retainers, goes home, husband comes home, goes to beat her, she present the loin cloth to remind him of his poverty, tells him to ask his retainers who the property belongs to, ask whether it is hers or his, then ask to beat her, the prince had no response, gives up his drive to beat her, the end.

The Lark and the Taming of Women

Husband and Wife Wife Beaters Romania Man plowing a field, lark begs him not to plow over the nest, he says his bitch wife will beat him if he doesn't, lark tells him to beat the wife with a short stick if she does, she comes into the field furious, he beats the hell out of her with a stick, he fears her revenge, lark tells him to just sneak in and beat her before she hits him with an even longer stick, he does, she is beaten into submission, this is the first time men ever beat their wives, the practice spreads to the neighbors everywhere, women have a meeting on what to do, head women says they should cross the Danube leaving the men, they get ready, all the mean decide to kill the man who started the trend, lark says he will fix it, tells the women there are no men on the other side, they come back, man isn't killed, since then men beat their women and not the other way around, if a man is beaten he is not a man but a donkey.

Two in a Sack

Husband and Wife Wife Beaters Russia There is a guy who gets the šhïît beaten out of him by his wife, one day he can't take it so he goes into the field with a net, what kind of bird did he catch? a crane, crane sesy free me, he says no bc his wife, he says come back to my place, he goes, crane takes a sack and says Two out of a sack!, two dudes crawl out with oak table and amazing meal, crane says take the sack to wife, he goes, gets tired and visits his cousin, tells them their dinner sucks and pulls out the sack, they are jealous and want to steal it, they prep a bath for him and make a fake sack to switch, he takes the fake sack home, birds laugh at him, hangs sack but nothing comes out and is beaten by his wife, he runs away to the field, yells at crane, crane invites him over, crane gives him new sack, he is walking back, summons the sack, two dudes come out and beat him for showing off to cousins, he gets them back in, goes to cousin, they prep a bath for him, he doesn't bathe, waits, they cousins use his sack, the men beat them, he ignores the pleas of all three daughters, finally they bring him the good sack, he leaves with the good and back sack, presents the good sack to wife and she is pleased, he puts away the good sack into the storeroom and hangs the bad sack up, she gets hungry, Two out of the sack!, she gets beat the ef up, husband lets it go for a while, the men give their typical rhyming lesson, husband takes pity on her, live happily ever after.

The Lion and the Hare

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Bidpai Baghdad meadow is full of furry creatures but a bitch lion keeps hunting animals for sport, the animals decide to come to him and ask him to stop, they propose they choose food to give to a king such as himself everyday, this works, one day it is a hare's choice to be eaten, he says instead he will release everyone from this tyranny, goes to lion, makes up this story about a competing lion that says he has the rights to hunt in the meadow exclusively, says also the lion took the other hare that was coming, real lion gets pissed, goes out to kill the rival, the hare leads him to the well, tells him to wait, lion gets more angry, looks into well, sees his and the hare's reflection, assuming it is the rival lion and other hare he dives in, he is never seen again.

The Scorpion and the Tortoise

The Powerful and the Weak Good and Evil Bidpai Turtle and scorpion become friends, they go, reach a river, must cross, turtle offers the scorpion to ride his back since he can't swim, the go, scorpion starts whetting stinger to see if it can stab the turtle's shell, scorpion is drowned.

The Gentile and the Jew

The Powerful and the Weak Good and Evil Jewish Jew and gentile walk along and agree that whoever has the better religion will give have the other give them all their money, they walk, the Satan appears an old man, young boy, and old man and says the gentile's religion is better, Israelite loses money, walks along and sleeps in the open, hears three spirits talking at night, finds out what happened to him, spirits exchange the bad things that they did today, 2nd spirit says he prevented the birth of a king's daughter that only required leaf juice to bring birth, the 3rd said he clogged a well that needs a black ox to be sacrificed to open up, Jew leaves the next day and uses the advice to help the King, gets money, helps the village with the stopped well, gets large sum of money, sees the gentile, gentile asks about money, Jew tells, gentile goes and tries to repeat his actions and is killed by the three spirits.

True and Untrue

The Powerful and the Weak Good and Evil Norway Two boys born to poor mother, sent out to find bread in the world, each given napsacks, Untrue says they should eat all from True's until it is gone and then from his, True agrees, Untrue eats like a glutton leaving True with only burnt crusts, his bag is empty the next day, Untrue calls him a fool and refuses to share his food, tears his eyes out, True wanders through a forest and up a Linden tree to sleep, Bruin the Bear, Grayless the wolf, Slyboots the fox, and Longears the hare come into the tree to celebrate St John's Eve, Bear talks about rubbing dew from linden tree to cure the King's sight, Wolf talks about cutting open the frog who ate the king's daughter's dropped bread under the floorboards at church to cure her deaf and dumbness, Fox talks about clean spring hidden under a central garden rock, Hare talks about digging up thrice circled gold chain around king's garden to let his apples grow, they leave, True cures his blindness, goes into the king's service, king complains of muddy water, True helps him out, King complains because he can't see a hawk he wanted to shoot, True shows him linden tree dew, True becomes the king's right hand man, princess walks pass, True digs up frog from floorboards and cures the princess, wedding, during wedding dirty beggar asks for food, it is Untrue, True still offers him food, tells him of his story, Untrue goes to the same tree, animals complain that someone has been using their secrets, they say nothing, Untrue gets nothing.

Dharmabuddhi and Papabuddhi

The Powerful and the Weak Good and Evil The Panchatantra Dharmabuddhi is good, Papabuddhi has unjust heart, Papa suggests they travel , he intends to get rich off Dharma by stealing money, convinces him to travel, they grown rich, coming home, Papa suggests burying large fortune in the woods and taking home a small bit, they do, Papa comes back at night and steals it all, Papa take Dharma next day to the hole, Papa pretends the Dharma stole the fortune, they take it to court, they say to leave it to God since there are no documents or witness, resolve it to the tree God the next day, before Papa makes his dad go into the tree and be the fake voice of the tree god when they come by, they go, the tree speaks, shock, king's servants search the law books for the punishment, Dharma surrounds the tree with fire, father comes out burning, confesses to servants and dies, Papa is hung from a tree, Dharma only gets compliments.

The Elephant and His Keeps

The Powerful and the Weak Masters and Servants India Animal keeper is a dick to animals, sleeps far from elephant kept on rope, elephant uses a branch to pull him close one night, tramples him to death.

The Camel Driver and the Adder

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Bidpai Camel driver camps in the plain where a caravan the night before has coals from a fire, wind kicks up the coals and the grass is on a fire, an adder snake wakes up encircled in flames and begs for the driver's help, feeling bad for suffering the camel driver put a sack on the end of his spear and saved the adder, driver tells it to leave, adder says it will have to sting him and the camel and the driver can choose who goes first, driver says it is ungrateful to return evil for good, snake says it is the way of men, man calls him a liar and they look for supporters, a cow in a field says that men return evil for good citing how the cow served her master well with milk but is now left to pasture to be fattened and butchered tomorrow, man says courts require two witnesses, they ask a tree, tree says it treats travelers wheel with dates and shade but men take wood from it to make canes and doors and thus evil returned for good, adder says the case is settled, man begs for a fox to be heard, adder agrees, he tells the fox a tale, fox says it is fiction and questions how such a large adder could fit into the small sack, adder goes into sack to prove him wrong, tells man to quickly close it, fox says kill it due to its ungratefulness and deserving of death.

The Merchant and His Iron

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Bidpai Friends, one gives the other two hundred tons of iron for safekeeping in case his travels prove worse, they do, friend meanwhile thinks the other guy will never come back so he sells the iron to pay off debts, he does come back, needs the iron, friend makes excuse that there was a rat hole and the rats ate the iron, guy pretends to believe him, friend buys the lie, guy sees friend's son in the street, locks him in the apartment, next day dines with the friend, friend is distressed because the kid is gone, dude says he saw a sparrowhawk lift him, friend calls bull says it can't lift a fifty pound boy, man says that should be so surprise seeing that he lives in a place where rats can eat 2 tons of iron, tells him to return the iron for the boy, the end.

The Reward of Good Deeds

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Denmark Man goes into the woods to chop firewood, doesn't chop down the trees that are good for timber, finds one that is rotted and good for nothing, almost brings the axe to the tree when he hears a viper ask for help, viper is stuck in the tree, man says he will not help because the viper will attack him when freed, the viper lies and says it won't, gets free, prepares to bite, man says he is a rascal that rewards good with evil, viper says that all good is rewarded with evil, man disagrees and says good is rewarded with good, viper says that is not how the world is, they inquire other animals about it, find a lame horse with broken teeth grazing, ask the horse the question, horse replies how he did his master well and was fed well but now is old with no shelter and provided food and works on a treadmill, says good is rewarded with evil, viper is ready to attack, fox comes and the man asks the fox, whispers to the fox to say good is rewarded with good, fox says that and bites the viper's neck, as viper dies it says See all good is rewarded with Evil, man thanks the fox, tells him to come into town with him and get two geese as reward, fox says no because the town dogs will eat him, man goes home and has wife put geese in a bag, she instead puts in two dogs, man takes it back to the woods and fox takes bag, notices its weight, opens it, dogs bite it to death, dying words are What i said first was a lie, all good deeds are rewarded with evil.

The Countryman and the Merchant

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Georgia Countryman captures a pheasant in the field one day, the pheasant begs for freedom and in exchange will give the man a funeral procession of a thousand birds, countryman likes this, goes home, each day a bird is sent to check if he is dead, he devises a plan with his wife to fake dead and lure the birds into the house to kill them for a large amount of food, they do this, large stores of fowl are everywhere, merchant comes by and asks how this happened, countryman tells him it is his great cat, merchant buys the cat from the countryman for large sum, goes home, cat does nothing, comes back angry to countryman, countryman expects this, prepares a pot of millet, is washing a single grain and throws it into the pot when the merchant arrives, merchant thinks it's a magic pot, complains of the cat and the countryman says you needed to feed it roast meat, merchant buys the pot for him, it doesn't work, comes back angry, countryman anticipates this and gets two identical hares, one in the house with the wife and one in the field with the same ribbon, tells wife to send merchant when he comes the field, this happens, merchant meets countryman in field and tells him he should be fed and then discuss, grabs rabbit and tells it to run home to the wife to prepare boiled fowl, turkey, ten eggs, wine and bread, wife has had these prepared already, merchant buys hare, walks home and meets buddy and sends hare to wife to prepare food, hare runs away, no message reaches the wife, merchant goes back to the countryman, countryman fills intestine with blood and ties it in a kerchief around wife's neck, merchant comes, countryman pretends to stab wife, merchant is shocked, countryman pretends to revive wife, merchant buys magical knife for his wife, goes home, stabs wife if she doesn't shut up, she doesn't, she is permanent, runs to countryman, ties him to a tree in the forest to torture him, leaves him to attend the funeral of a king, shepherd comes by and the countryman convinces him he is tied to a tree because he is forced to become the new king, shepherd takes his place and his clothes, merchant takes the man to a cliff and drowns him thinking he is insane, countryman appears later with a flock, tells merchant who is now a beggar that sheep were in the sea, merchant agrees to be thrown of the cliff with a switch in hand, dies, the end.

Of Nature and the Returns of Ingratitude

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Gesta Romanorum Emperor goes on an afternoon hunt and comes along a serpent bound to a tree by shepherds, moved by pity he frees it but the snake injects him with venom, snake says it is because he acted according to his nature, all it can offer is poison, through man it became cursed, philosopher shows up to judge them, tells the same to bound itself to the tree again, tells it to unbound itself, it says it can't, philosopher says Then die because you were ungrateful to man and always will be, tells the emperor to shake the poison out and leave, says the serpent is influenced only by his natural propensities. CHRISTIAN APPLICATION STATED: emperor is ecclesiastic, wood is world, snake it devil, shepherds are preachers, philosopher is discrete confessor.

Miracle upon Miracle

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters The Panchatantra Two merchants Nanduka and Lakschmana the fortunate one, Lakschmana loses all his money and decides to travel, Proverb: he who lives well in a particular place but stays after lost wealth is of common mind. Proverb2: a person reduced to misery who remains at the same place is worthy of reproach Gives large iron scales to Nanduka to keep safe while he is gone, travels, comes home and Nanduka says the mice at them, Lakschmana says its not his fault then, request to bathe and have Nanduka's son carry his clothing, he consents fearfully, Proverb: no one does favors without motive. Proverb2: Unusual courtesy requires caution. Lakschmana throws the son in a cave closed by a stone, goes back, says it was a falcon, Nanduka calls bs, Lakshmana calls the mice story bs, they go to kings court, tell their story, court doesn't believe the falcon story, Lakshmana laughing says: Proverb: the day mice eat 1000 pound iron scales is the day falcons carry elephants and little boys Judges don't get it, Lakschmana tells story, court rules them to return each other's property, they do respectively, the end.

Harisarman

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters India Harisarman is a poor foolish brahman, has a lot of kids, goes begging for work and gets job with a rich householder, kids tend the horses and cows, wife is a servant, him an attendant, wedding happens and he expects to be given food, Sthuladatta forgets, he gets mad, tells the wife to tell the householder he is magic, steals the man's horse in the night and hides it, wife tells Sthuladatta in the morning of husbands magic, Harisarman pretends to draw diagrams and tells him where to recover the horse, hailed as a sage and honored man, one day king has stuff stolen by a thief, employs Harisarman, buys time by saying he will tell the king tomorrow, shut in a guarded room, thief is a maid named Jihva which means tongue, listens to the door and hears him curse his tongue, she thinks he found her out, she sneaks in a breaks a deal, tells him the gold is buried behind the palace, he gets a small sum, for sparing the maid, he tells the king where it is and that the thief escaped with a small sum, he self reflects on how ******** lucky he just got by saying random stuff, tells king where the treasure is and he gets revenue from some villages, king's advisors Devajnanin tells him Harisarman might be in cahoots with thieves or have secret knowledge, tests Harisarman by placing a cloth covered picture and being questioned about its contents, Harisarman laments about his childhood nickname which is Froggie, frog is inside the pitcher, exclaims this is a fine pitcher froggie and it will be your demise, everyone is shocked and he gets more village revenue, gold, umbrella and state carriages, he prospers, the end.

The Mongoose Boy

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters India Raja has one wife with 6 six and a second wife with one mongoose son, sons are asses to the mongoose son, rja dad wants to divide his property among the sons, the sons wish to travel and have the father give them money to try and trade but at the least be able to travel off of, the raja grants this, mongoose asks for money too but is denied and made fun of, asks father in privatem gets 10 rupees while older brothers got 20 each, they leave, mongoose follows brothers, they lose his trail in a forest and go to a horse bazaar to get horses (Nilam bazaar), mongoose goes to Sujan bazaar and fails at getting a servant or horse, goes to Nilam and sees brothers, can't afford a horse but gets a donkey and stuff to trade successfully, 6 months pass and boys return to home, father i impressed only with mongoose boy who successfully traded, brothers are jelly. 2/3 years later there is a famine, Lelsing mongoose boy predicted this and dug huge whole with rice and grain under his house, he helps out the brothers, they are jelly and burn his house down, store of food is fine, he takes ashes of house to sell, no one buys, sleeps under a tree on a road, merchants pass and he tells them to sleep farther away because he fears thieves will take his 2 sacks of gold (ashes), merchants steal ashes and replace the sacks with rice and rupee filled bags, shows off to brothers, tells them if only he had more houses to make money he would burn them, brothers burn houses, no one buys the ashes and they are laughed at, seek revenge, kill Lelsing's mother, he takes mother to road and props her on a tree, tells approaching band of merchants not to trample her with bullocks, they pass, he accuses them of murder, they give him bullocks and merchandise to avoid the charge, goes back, tells brothers, they kill their wives, no one buys corpses, embarrassment, revenge, pretend to set up Lelsing with wife, put him in marriage carriage, they take him to river to be drowned, he tricks a shepherd into thinking he is being forced into marriage and whomever replaces him gets a wife, shepherd wants wife, swaps places, dies, Lelsing gets flock of sheep, returns to amaze brothers, tells them to sheep were at the bottom of the deep river pool and buffalo and cattle are in deeper ones if only they let Lelsing push them in their marriage palki into the river, they all agree begging for deepest pool, all drown, Lelsing goes home rejoicing.

Crab

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Italy King loses ring and challenges any astrologer to find it for a great son, poor illiterate guy who wishes to be an astrologer goes to king, king gives him a room with large book to scribble in, he scribbles for months, the servants who stole the rings thought he was beginning to suspect them by the fierce glances he gave them when they entered, Crab imagines that the peasants must know about the ring, wife comes, tells her to says that is one and that is two from under a bed when the servants come, she does this, they are frightened, decide to bribe the astrologer with money purse, Crab agrees, he tells them to feed the ring to a turkey, goes to king, tells him the turkey ate it, open the turkey, there it is, huge purse reward for Crab, gets invited to a banquet, crab is served and only a few know what it is called, king tells him since he is such a good astrologer he must know the name of the food served, he mutters ah Crab Crab what a plight you are in, they don't know Crab is his name, all proclaim him to be the greatest astrologer in the world, the end.

The Hedgehog and the Hare

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Leo Tolstoy Hare makes fun of hedgehog for being slow due to his tiny and crooked legs, hedgehog challenges the hare to a race, tells wife to hide at finish line, both start at line, hare sprints, he burrows, wife appears at finish line, hare is in disbelief, challenges for another race the other way, hare runs, wife burrows, husband pops up at finish line and says I win, hare tries again and again and again, collapses with exhaustion, never berates the hedgehog again, hedgehog wins with wit.

Big Peter and Little Peter

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Norway Big Peter's dad died and he got the inheritance of the farm and the household, little Peter lived to a certain age in the house with his mother and was sent off with his inheritance, he goes to town with a fine horse and throws festivities till the money runs out, comes home broke to mother with only a small calf, sets it to eat from his Brother's pasture, brother is mad and kill it, lil peter skins and dries the calf hide, tries to sell it but there are no buyers, heads home, passes farm house, asks for lodging but the woman says no because her husband is at the upper pasture house, he walks away, sees her feeding a priest custard ale and brandy, husband comes home and she hides him in a chest, the custard under the mantel and brandy/ale in the cellar, returns, husband opens the door and lil Peter asks for lodging, sits at dinner table and pretends his cow hide contains a fortune teller, steps on the skin and tells the husband where the hidden stuff is and he thinks its magic, buys it from little Peter in exchange for the large chest with priest inside, takes chest, goes to bridge, threatens to drop the priest over the edge bc he pretends he thinks its the devil, gets a gold and silver watches and 800 dollars in exchange for his life, frees priest, goes home and pretends to his brother that that is the price he got at the market for skins, brother kills his cow and demands 800 dollar plus price at market, he is made a fool, comes home, gets axe to kill brother, brother pete switches bed positions with mother, brother decapitates mother, little pete bribes terrified big pete for 800 dollars, little pete attaches head to mom and to sled with apple baskets, goes to market, has mother hold apples, she doesn't respond to a customer who doesn't know she is dead, he slaps her and her head falls off, skipper is bribed for 800 dollars, goes home and tells pete old women are getting good market price today, Big Pete kills mother in law and takes her to market, sheriff wants to arrest him, they leave in the night, lil pete wishes to be carried in a sack, Big pete carries him to a bridge and goes home for something, passerby shepherd hears Pete yell to the king of heaven and is tricks shepherd into switching places with him bc he wants to go to heaven, man trades places, lil pete takes the flock, big pete drwons man in sack in stream, lil pete shows up with sheep, tells brother to have his wife throw him in the stream to find the fine huge flocks of sheep below, has his wife do it, he dies, she jumps in after him thinking he needs help with the large flock of sheep. the end. lil pete inherits the farm and fields and horses and tools and has money to buy cattle, the end. 3

The Monkey's Heart

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters The Jataka Tales Boddhista lives below the Himalayas as a monkey on a river bend of the Ganges, a crocodile's wife sees how big framed the monkey his and wants to eat his heart, husband says fine, lures the monkey to the edge of the water, tells the monkey there is far more fruit on trees the other side of the Ganges, monkey wonders how to cross, crocodile gives him his back to ride across on, he goes, croc starts to sink, monkey says what are you doing, croc says his wife wants his heart to eat, monkey says silly crocodile my heart is not in my body but rather they hang from a fruit tree, monkey points to fruit tree, crocodile agrees not to kill him and carries him to the shore and fig tree as long as the monkey will give him the heart, monkey runs away up the tree, makes fun of the crocodile for his tiny wit yet large body, says two rhyming stanzas, crocodile goes home sad.

The Cat and Mice

The Powerful and the Weak More Tricksters Tibet Mouse lives in a barn with tons of mice and has no trouble catching a lot, cat grows older and can't catch mice as well, cat tells the mice that she is growing older and is giving herself up to religious contemplation, for her gratitude she asks that the mice line up in a procession and give her salaam gratitudes twice a day, she eats the mice at the end of the line and no mice notice, after a while two clever mice friends than Rambe and Ambe begin to notice the decline, Rambe decides the next day to go to the front of the line and call out for Ambes response, they do this and the cat cannot capture mice for fear of being found out, she thinks it is a fluke but it happens again the next day, she waits again in silent anger, Rambe and Ambe warn the other mice, procession starts, Rambe passes cat and calls and gets response from Ambe, cat flips out and pounces the middle, mice scatter and not a single one it caught, Rambe and Ambe live long with honor in the mouse community.

The Lion, the Fox, and the Donkey

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation Aesop Lion fox and donkey go hunting, they get some booty, lion makes the donkey divide it in three, lion jumps the donkey and kills him, makes the fox divide the donkey and booty pieces, gives a huge amount to the lion and little to himself, lion says "you're smart kid", fox says "the donkey was a good teacher". Moral: Happy is he who learns from the misfortune of others.

The Lion's Share

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation Aesop Lion fox jackal and wolf hunt down a stag, lion tells them to divide it in four, lion claims 1st part as king of the beast, 2nd as arbiter in the meat division, 3rd for his part in the chase, and the 4th to whoever dares take it from him, lesser animals humph in disappointment. Moral: You may share the labors of the great, but you will not share the rewards.

The Wolf and the Lamb

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation Aesop Wolf is lapping from a spring, notices a lamb downstream lapping, looks for an excuse to eat it, accuses it of muddying the water, the lamb says hell nah bro i'm down stream, fox tries again saying you called me bad names last year, lamb is like false bro I'm 6 months old, fox says well then it was your punk father, fox jumps and eat the lamb. Moral: Any excuse will serve a tyrant.

Cat and Mouse in Partnership

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation Brothers Grimm Cat and mouse store a pot of fat under an altar at a church, three times the cat fakes being invited as godfather to a baby cat christening in order to satisfy his hunger, the baby cats are named Top-Off Half-Gone and All-Gone, mouse always says the names are peculiar, winter comes and they are hungry, they go to the church, the cat eats the mouse, the end

Clever Gretel

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation Brothers Grimm Gretel is a cook who wears shoes with red heels and gets drunk off wine and tastes what she eats until she eats all of it, master tells her to prepare dinner for an incoming guest, says to prep some chicken, she does, master leaves to get the guest because she says they are juicy now and shouldn't be spoiled, heat of the kitchen makes her thirsty so she goes to the wine cellar to drink, drinks, comes up, eats a wing of the chicken , the other to even it out, and then the whole thing, she thinks to herself since the master and guest are not here they must of gone somewhere else, she drinks more wine, comes up stairs, eats the second kitchen, master comes home with the guest shortly behind him, whetting a knife in the hall, guest comes, she says he better run because the master is going to cut off his ears, guest hides in the cellar, she tells master that the guest has stolen the chickens, master says he wanted just one, calls to guest, chases him screaming JUST ONE, guest runs home thinking he only wants to cut off just one ear.

Till Eulenspiegel

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation Germany Eule goes to Braunschweig, serves a master baker, master baker leaves him, Eule asks him what he should make, master baker says sarcastically to make owls or monkeys, he bakes real animals yells at Eule, baker demands for the dough, pays, sells the animals for huge profit, goes to Ascherleben, works for furrier, complains about the smell, furrier says its only natural and he should be fine with it, Eule sour farts, says it's more natural than the pelt smell, he is sent away, goes to Berlin, another furrier, lazy Swabian, shipment of wolf pelts come in, furrier asks him if he knows how to make wolves (meaning wolf coats), Eule takes it literally, sews and stuff pelts in shape of wolf, left without pay, falls ill, calls for a priest for he wants to confess before he dies, fills a bucket with muck and a thin layer of gold on top, priest says he needs money in exchange for entrance to heaven, Eule says don't reach too deep, he does, gets handful of shit, priest yells at him and walks away, Eule says yo you forgot your money, lies there, the end.

The Good Husband and the Bad Wife

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation India Brahman is super nice but her has a bitch wife, since God willed the marriage they stay married. she tells all of the guests her husband invites over to dinner to screw off, A dumb friend of the Brahman visits and is invited to dinner, the husband goes to the river to bathe but the friend stays on the outer veranda, wife is not outwardly mean to this guest so she decides to trick him, smears cow dung before him and lays a pestle, he asks what it is for, she replies it is for Goddess worship and her husband bashes the head of of a mean each time he come home with the pestle, guest is naturally afraid of having his skull broken, wants to leave, she suggests he goes out the back door, he runs away in fear, husband returns, she accuses him of being greedy and wanting her to give him the pestle (which was a 40 year old dowry), ridiculously nice husband says he would rather give him the dowry than lose the guest, chases him with the pestle, guest says screw off.

The Cruel Merchant

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation India Merchant who hires servants and is cruel and says if they ever get angry he is allowed to cut of their nose. Tempered farmer enters his service and fails, farmer's brother heard and seeks revenge, enters an agreement that allows him to cut off the merchant's nose should he ever get angry, brother follows the directions too literally, "run about quickly and dress the child" see he ran while dressing the kid, second time Master leaves for a festival and tells him to keep an eye on the door and windows, brother throws all the valuables into a pit and mobile carries the doors and windows to the festival, Merchant gets pissed and slaps him, brother thereby wins and cuts off the merchant's nose, quits, tells his brother.

The Gardener's Cunning Wife

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation India Poor greens farmer and his wife live together, he sells his greens at the market and on the way back passes a temple of Kali, in front is a forbidden mango tree with a fish tank under it, anyone caught taking from these sources is excommunicated from the village, the husband can't help himself and plucks one mango and takes half a dozen fish, goes home, has his wife cook them, begins watering the garden, while cooking it tastes so good that the wife tastes bits until half is gone, it finishes cooking, she calls for husband, he is busy running about watering his greens, he waves at her and she takes it as indication to eat more, this happens a total three times till she eats it all, fears the wrath of her husband, fakes being taken over by a God or demon, husband is tricked, she yells like a God and commands him to take two pans and plunge them under the water to fix his mistake, he goes, she avoids the wrath.

How the Man taught the Tiger to Fly

The Powerful and the Weak Resignation India (Assam) Tiger and man talk, bird flies by and the tiger wishes to fly, dude says he can help, ties the tiger to a wooden board, next day tiger complains and he drives stakes into his armpits to make wings, next day drives stake into his body to make a tail, tiger is eaten by flies and maggots before the man says he will return.