ANTH 315 Final Review

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Importance of dowry

- money and jewelry, furniture and clothing, electronics and automobiles that the girl's family gives as payment to the boy's family. - Dowry is everywhere in India. - pan-Indian phenomenon -women have little or no control over their dowries -North India, girls are huge economic drain on families -large dowry=good man -raise value, protect from marital violence

Gilbertson: From respect to Friendship? Companionate marriage and conjugal power in middle-class Hyderabad

Companionate marriage in India has been described as "a shift 'from duty to desire' in marriage" (Gilbertson 225) The modern Indian woman is looking for a more fulfilling relationship in her marriage, one that incorporates "personal choice, romantic love and partnership" (Gilbertson 225) The past put emphasis mostly on social obligation in relationships between husband and wife in India, now there is a trend towards a relationship built on affection, where the man is concerned for the happiness of his wife and they work together on a more equal footing. This type of marriage differs greatly from the traditional notions of marriage in India. Traditional notions are that a woman exists only for the benefit of the man and to continue his line through male children. Women often never meet and do not know their husbands before they marry. Once married, women are kept from spending time with their husbands so that they will not develop a close bond. This was primarily accomplished by the husband's mother who wanted to keep the close relationship she had with her son intact. This was done to ensure that the son would care for his parents as they aged and would not be influenced by his wife if she had different ideas. The newer ideas of companionship and friendship in marriage goes against everything that traditional marriage once represented. This different type of marriage has become more widespread because people see it as being in tune with a new sense of modernity that is spreading throughout many cultures of the world. To make it easier to incorporate in the traditionally arranged marriages in India, couples are attempting to make their marriages more attractive by making their own decisions about how the marriage will move forward according to their own ideals of a perfect union. Many young couples are making their own choices about how their relationship will move forward after they are married, and are beginning to move away from the traditionally distant relationship of husband and wife and breaking with the tradition of the son's close attachment to his mother by purposefully creating a closer bond with his wife. The Indian shift towards a more modern marriage does not move away completely from the traditional concept of a proper marriage. Though the marriages are still arranged primarily by the parents, the young people are having a more hands-on involvement in the process, concerning themselves with finding a match that suits their tastes and which includes the elements of desire and friendship. Young people are still concerned with the perception of respectability that is so vital to Indian's identities, and so do not completely do away with the traditions that went before. They do, however, want to incorporate "globally oriented ideas of progressiveness and open-mindedness". (Gilbertson 227) "More equal gender relations" among Gilbertson's participants involved a different concept of marriage for many men. "In their homes, they wanted system, order, efficiency, and hygiene; in their wives, literacy, education, companionate marriage, and love." (Gilberston 228) The middle-class of Hyderabad placed enormous importance on companionship and romantic love in their marriages. They used the time during their engagements to experience courtship and to fall in love. What is interesting in these situations is that they do not try to break with the tradition of arranged marriage, but instead, use the time before marriage to learn how to love each other and to develop feelings of romance and intimacy. This is very different from the western view of marriage and would not be possible in most western countries because the whole idea of finding a way to love somebody who is chosen for you is so very foreign. However, it is almost a natural evolution for the traditionally arranged marriages in India, where people don't want to break a system that has worked for generations, but find a way to improve the system and gain a sense of fulfillment, love and satisfaction. As married couples learned how to share power and labor, their relationship developed in a positive direction which resulted in even more friendship and intimacy. The desire for intimacy among married couples and those about to be married, has become one of the most important topics when considering what is important in a modern marriage in India. Some participants who felt that men and women were becoming more equal, also felt that there was potential danger in women having a higher education and better paying jobs than their husbands and which would result in disaster due to the woman appearing to have more power than her husband and the marriage ending in divorce. Some participants felt that as women gained more power in the workplace, they also demanded more power in the marriage and this resulted in both sides fighting for a dominant position in the relationship and the marriage becoming poisoned and damaged. This was perceived as a "Westernizing" influence on marriages in India and a danger to the stability of marriages in India and to the traditions of Indian culture.

Raval: Negotiating conflict between personal desires and others expectations

Kapadia depicted a constant conflict between the wishes of her characters and others' expectations and preferences. Vasudha, the heroine of the novel, liked her coffee with extra cream, but she couldn't have it because Faiba (her husband's paternal aunt who had raised him and managed the household) objected to her consuming cream, a fairly luxurious item. Vasudha had brought some books from her natal home but she couldn't read because Faiba would not approve of wasting time in this way. Vasudha liked writing letters to her sister once in a while, but she couldn't because Faiba thought the postage was an unnecessary expense. She wanted to help a neighbor's daughter but she couldn't because Vyomesh, her husband, thought that it was not their responsibility. Lalita, who lived in the same building as Vasudha, had a degree in Sanskrit literature and enjoyed reading the Shakuntal, but she could not even get her copy of the Shakuntal out of the attic because her husband would think it is silly to do something so useless. Vaasanti, another neighbor, enjoyed Indian classical music and wanted to learn, but her husband thought that she should focus on the household. On a day-to-day basis, Kapadia's characters go through these conflicts between their wishes, sometimes as minor as a preferred way to drink coffee, and others' expectations, likes, and desires. These characters (at least early on in their lives) unquestioningly follow what others want, and rarely ever convey their wishes to others. (490) While I was conducting an initial focus group about women's parenting beliefs, discussion turned to their day-to-day interpersonal conflicts within the family. As one woman explained, what children need and how to parent children were secondary issues, because no matter what ideas they had about child rearing, these ideas needed to be negotiated with others' opinions and preferences, particularly those of their in-laws. (495) This dilemma is similar to what Ewing (1990) has described in her ethnographic writing on Pakistani women. Ewing described how Shamim, a Pakistani woman, shifted back and forth between the Islamic cultural model of being the dutiful daughter who should sacrifice her feelings and respect the wishes of her parents who gave her birth, food, and, education, and a model described by Pakistani women as ''politics of everyday life.'' This political model dictates that ''each person operates to maximize his or her advantage (or that of his or her family) vis a` vis others in order to realize personal or familial wishes and goals'' (Ewing 1990:260). It is a model of negotiations encompassing personal perspectives, collective values, and distributed access to power. Shamim struggled between her wish to marry a person of her own choice and her parents' wish that she did not marry him. Although Shamim hoped to convince her parents, she did not wish to pressure or disobey them. She actively negotiated as she moved between her desire to choose a life partner and her parents' expectation that she marry the person that they choose. Learning about Shamim's and Miraben's motivations, desires, and attempts to convince others provides the reader with a much more nuanced picture of what it means to be a Pakistani or Indian woman in a particular time and space. (504) Feminist literature in psychological anthropology has portrayed women in patriarchal families as agents in their social world (Lamb 2000; McHugh 1989, 2004; Minturn 1993; Narayan 1997; Raheja and Gold 1994; Seymour 1999; Trawick 1992).Within this tradition, based on my analysis of the narratives of Gujarati Hindu women of two different generations, I argue that the situations of conflict between their own desires and others' expectations are characterized by exercising agency in the forms of active negotiation with others in the family. Such situations are not straightforward two-way streets: one leading to fulfillment of one's own needs, and the other to the realization of others' goals. These scenarios pose complex moral dilemmas that one needs to constantly work through in intrapsychic and interpersonal spaces. By taking an insider approach to understanding the day-to-day experiences of these women's lives, a nuanced picture of their personhood emerges. (504) - Helpless resignation was not seen as an option as it would affect the children - Children need to be involved in extracurricular activities; viewed as a waste of time by mother-in law - Women maintained their familial roles and obligations but also actively negotiated - These negotiations are complex and have moral dilemmas - Young mothers patiently resist and negotiate their ideas about child rearing with their mothers-in law - This is done for the benefit of children They are not challenging the social structure of the family

Sudhir Kakar

o Says autonomy is devalued; conformity is valued o Says Indians experience a push-pull between being individuals and part of a group o Personal identity fused with group identity

Patrifocal family

- A family that is controlled and centered around the father - An emphasis on the importance of the joint family. - Joint family = multigenerational family - Males have authority over the same generation females (husbands over wives; brothers over sisters)

Advantages of educating a daughter

- A well-educated daughter can be independent and not rely on a husband. - This is important when looking for a husband, because the girl doesn't have to marry somebody to support her, she can marry somebody who is compatible with her. - Being well-educated also makes her more attractive to possible husbands, because she is more compatible with a man who is well-educated and she will help him by making a good salary and helping to improve their status. - becomes global -easier to find good job -provides for herself -can teach children

Disadvantages of educating a daughter

- A well-educated daughter might make finding a husband more difficult because some men will think that she has too much in her head and will not be interested in taking care of him, staying home and keeping house and making babies. - Her husband's family might not like that she is well-educated because she may not listen to them and do what they tell her to do. - too indepedent -has opinions -cannot be too educated- hard to find groom

Important qualities for both bride and groom

- A:age, B:beauty, C:complexion, D:dowry, E:education, F:fertility, G:gold - age: age gap good - height: tall - weight: thin, built, slim - skin: healthy, light, and fair - education: educated - class: economically high standing - global - astrology matters too - presentability: well-groomed, professionalism

Indian perspectives on marriage (love vs. arranged); modern vs more traditional views

- Arranged marriage is much more common in India than love marriages, and is still the most common in India today - Economic transaction -Marriages are arranged, even among the highly educated, 90-95% -non-arranged: "love-match" -marriage important and feel to inexperience to choose properly, so they let their parents do that for them; stress and anxiety are left to parents -marrying against family is too hard. Everything is run by acquaintances and family and going against that is going against the whole system -physical attributes, education, family's background/reputation, class= important requisites - Modern views are turning a bit towards finding a "companionate marriage" where you find somebody you like and who you get along with. Also called "love marriages".

The Darker Side of Fair

- Basically talks about how Indians want to marry people with lighter skin than most Indians actually have. - There are a lot more dark skinned Indians than fair skinned Indians, but everybody wants to marry a fair skinned Indian. - Everybody also wants to have fair skinned children. - Even if both the parents have dark skin, they still hope for a fair skinned child. - Mothers will drink milk and saffron hoping that it will make their babies be born with fair skin. - Movie start in India are mostly fair skinned. - Models for traditional clothing can be a little darker, but models for western style clothing are all fair skinned.

What are the 3 humours?

- Bodily flows *Vata (wind) = movement in the body and in each cell. - Responsible for respiration, blood circulation, excretion, speech, and the stimulation of the internal fire, which helps digestion (digestion is incredibly important!) *Pitta (bile) = the internal bodily fire - agni. - Responsible for hunger, thirst, digestion, various emotional states, intelligence * Kapha (phlegm) = cools and protects the body. - Responsible for bodily processes of conservation, preservation, healing

Bharadwaj, A. : Why adoption is not an option

- Child adoption in the face of reproduction gone awry continues to remain an under researched aspect of contemporary Indian reality. - Thus, when faced with infertility, couples in this research emerged as favouring secret gamete donation as a means of bypassing infertility rather than the option of adoption. - Adoption continues to remain an undesirable option because the links between an adopted child and the social parent become a public, vocal, and visible admission of infertility that cannot be subsumed, like donated gamete conception, under a conspiracy of silence. (1867) - Barring a handful of couples, a great majority, when asked to share their views on donated gamete conception, felt it was acceptable as long as it was kept quiet. On the issue of the donor itself the unanimous response of these couples was that they were happy to let the doctor source a suitable donor and that they had no personal preferences. These couples were very much less concerned about the sourcing of eggs and sperms for inducing conception than about the eventual birth of a child. (1874) From outright rejection to last resort, adoption is the most difficult of solutions for infertile couples and their families. The reason for this is not hard to see, as adoption creates "the most" problematic visuality of fertility. It is an open and public declaration of failed fertility, not to mention the fears of failed sexuality. Most significantly, an adopted child breaks the link between the body and the progeny and becomes a visible "third party" in a way that makes it impossible for family groups to collude in a conspiracy of silence. (1875) A publicly visible child incorporated into the family without any corporeal connectedness with the family unit makes the child/couple vulnerable to social ridicule and stigma that is perceived to be worse than being called infertile. (1876) Likewise, an adopted child runs a high risk of being condemned to carry the burden of his unknown parentage as the only possible explanation of his failings or achievements. (1278)

Companionate marriage

- Companionate marriage in India has been described as "a shift 'from duty to desire' in marriage" (Gilbertson 225) The modern Indian woman is looking for a more fulfilling relationship in her marriage, one that incorporates "personal choice, romantic love and partnership" (Gilbertson 225) - There is now a trend towards a relationship built on affection, where the man is concerned for the happiness of his wife and they work together on a more equal footing. - This different type of marriage has become more widespread because people see it as being in tune with a new sense of modernity that is spreading throughout many cultures of the world. - Many young couples are making their own choices about how their relationship will move forward after they are married, and are beginning to move away from the traditionally distant relationship of husband and wife and breaking with the tradition of the son's close attachment to his mother by purposefully creating a closer bond with his wife.

Barbara Miller's analysis of the relationship between female infanticide and the Marxist mode of production

- Controlling population growth by limiting people to one or two children per couple. - This results in families deciding to eliminate girls in favor of boys Differences between the North & South North: -more intense preference for sons -higher discrimination for daughters -low demand for female labor -high cost for raising daughters South: -rice paddies -female labor valued -important role -inclusion of females in property-holding dowry, may include rights to land

Social dynamics of joint families

- Dadi's family: Dadi is the grandmother and "manager" of an extended family in the Haryana region of Northern India. Daughter-in-laws speak out about inherent tensions in the strict conservative household. The daughter-in-laws explain their loneliness as outsiders and want escape their unrealistic expectations of working the fields, perform all chores, raise children and still have food waiting at home for their men. - Wadley: "one straw from a deep broom can't sweep." There is an element of control in joint families. - Anthropologist: "Women and the Hindu tradition" - joint families are increasing (North India). - explains that joint family lifestyle silences the women of these families.

Tobacco in India: Why is it an important topic? What can anthropologists add?

- India is the 3rd largest producer of tobacco in the world, and over 4 million people are engaged full time in tobacco manufacturing. - Economic burden on families - Poor households spend money on tobacco versus food - Cycle of poverty where lower health quality from tobacco leads to greater poverty o Tobacco is not only a significant risk factor for many chronic diseases, it exacerbates many diseases and leads to serious complications o Second hand smoke affects every member of a smoker's household

Ayurveda: What is it?

- Literally means science of life or longevity - Aru - life, longevity - Veda - knowledge, science - Deals with sickness and its cure AND also prevention of illness - Ayurvedic medicines are herbal medicines - prepared by one's self and purchased - A conduit of yoga which origins reach from over 2000 years ago and is an important part of Indian culture. - Ayurveda is a whole-body healing system (mind, body, and spirit) that is maintained diet and regularity; illness prevention and life longevity ancient practice.

Dowry violence and deaths

- Many women are tortured and even killed because their husband and his family don't think her family paid enough dowry to them. - They will treat her badly and even throw her out if her family doesn't keep paying and paying. - It has gotten so bad, that the government has made it illegal to pay a dowry now, but nobody pays any attention and it keeps going on. - men paying smugglers to kidnap and bring them women from other parts of India - Mostly from poor or lower middle class families - Motivated largely by greed. - Crime committed in home by husband or mother in law. - only happens to women What is being done about it: -Women are protesting dowry should be banned -Dowry prohibition act of 1961: Not a very effective law because it is difficult to enforce.

Importance of hypergyny

- Marrying up; within caste, but higher in education or economically

Bidis

- More harmful than cigarettes - Has 3x more carbon monoxide and 5x as much tar and nicotine as cigarettes - Most popular tobacco product in India - 55% of tobacco consumption particularly among agricultural workers - No warning labels

How have anthropologists contributed to global tobacco control?

- Prevention program evaluation - Participated in Framework Convention for Tobacco Control (FCTC) - Protection from exposure to second hand smoke in work places, public transport, and indoor public spaces - Encourages tobacco tax increases - Prohibits sale to minors - Strengthens legislation to combat smuggling - Calls for testing, measuring, and regulating the contents and emissions of tobacco products.

Nichter & Nichter: A Tale of Simeon

- Simeon and how he grew up in India while Dr. Mimi and her husband (N&N) were conducting research. - Critics, rebuttals, cultural differences, norms, practices. - Child care: hired help to take care - problem when duty placed above morality because morality dictated by culture. Certain things they would not, in a normal Indian env. Let Simeon do, but because N&N told the help to, she did. She faced criticism from locals because Simeon was young and left to venture out, etc. - Lifestyle: mother should feed child by hand until child can fend for him/herself (grows older). - Child development differed - Impact of Simeon: 1. Easy for villagers to relate as a family unit 2. Gave health concerns a new meaning 3. He was a mirror reflecting their own cultural socialization and biases 4. Delightful - gave humor, made fieldwork more human

Pathak: Presentable: The body and neoliberal subjecthood in contemporary India

- The opening up of the Indian economy through a series of neoliberal reforms since 1991 ushered in processes of globalization that have led to a rapidly changing socio-cultural environment in India. - Economic growth, globalization discourses, and new consumer choices have driven desires for new global-yet-Indian identities. - An emerging consumer agency has allowed for the embodiment and performance of these identities at the site of the body, even as new spaces of consumption have necessitated new bodily dispositions and practices. (1) When it comes to getting married, presentability is a significant focus of anxiety and effort. - Presentability was also repeatedly used to reference workplace expectations. - Informants mentioned that whereas beauty was not a reasonable expectation of employees, presentability was an implicit prerequisite. - Being presentable at work was not just about avoiding loud makeup and inappropriate clothes, but it also involved the skillful use of grooming techniques, makeup, and clothing in creating a professional image of oneself. (4) - Ultimately, being presentable is thus about a loose but critical mixture of grooming, taste, and bearing that links acceptable Indianness to the world. - presentability as a notion and ideal that emerged out of the experience of economic liberalization in India, is a new concept, one that has not necessarily been passed on to middle-class individuals during their experience of growing up. - To be presentable requires not just economic and cultural access, but also interest, savvy, and the ability to improvise - Requiring presentability of individuals is a way of disciplining bodies; a body that does not look appropriate declares a person unfit for marriage, employment, or other opportunities. - A person's failure to 'look' presentable renders him or her unfit to 'be' presented to others, either as a professional, or a spouse, or even a traveler. (11-12) - This notion, based on a global Indian identity, is a new category of middle-class neoliberal subjectivity built around selfconsciously inhabiting an urban, professional, middle-class aesthetic by exercising appropriate consumer agency. - Presentability is about disciplining bodies so that they project a cosmopolitan Indian self while also structuring subjectivities such that appearance becomes a source of both pleasure and pain. - In this, presentability is characteristic of the new relationship between the body and neoliberal subjecthood in contemporary India. (13)

Missing Women

- Women in India are pressured by their family and community to kill their baby daughters when they have girls at home already. Or even abandoning the babies somewhere. - They say that girls are not worth anything/have no value and they just stay home, take care of their brothers and do household chores - There are people and organizations that go around monitoring and trying to prevent families from killing their daughters. - Families have parties and celebrations when a boy is born, but they are upset and sad when a girl is born.

Important qualities when looking for a groom

- employment matters - higher positions matter - military is not the most desirable - Light skin color - Slim - Broadminded - meaning that he has traveled or lived outside India

Disadvantages of joint family systems

- everyone has to obey the male head of the family and cannot do anything without his permission. - Nobody has any privacy because there are so many people around and usually not enough room.

Advantages of joint family systems

- everyone lives together and shares expenses such as housing costs, food, transportation. - There are many people present to help with child care, household chores and cooking. - There can be several people working and bringing in income to help the family move up in the world. - Also, in the country, lots of people in the household can help run the farm and increase production at little cost.

dynamic ideology

- gender and class - afluent classes in India - global but -traditional - self inclusive Indian identification, belonging to Indian culture, but can live with the lifestyles outside India - Women work, but still stay as mothers,within traditional Indian ideology -transnational people

Childlessness and stigma (why is this the case in India)?

- infertility: woman called "bunja" - Reasons for male infertility include: alcohol, tobacco, stress and poor nutrition. - Being childless has many negative social, cultural and emotional repercussions for women. This can be a reason for a husband to abandon a wife, or take a second wife. - Some causes of infertility are the cross cousin marriage which brings close blood relatives together in marriage and may cause infertility. - Sexually transmitted diseases can also cause infertility. Stigmatized: -kept away from auspicious occasions (weddings, naming ceremonies; first pregnancy ceremonies) -considered themselves as bad luck -women with education and occupational leverage can avoid stigmatizing themselves Adoption: -rare in India, traditionally occurs within families - is not a good option in India because the government makes it very hard to adopt and families don't believe the adopted child will take care of them when they are old, or the birth mother may come to take the child back later - It makes the man look like he is not producing and this damages his image.

Advantages of nuclear family systems

- the family is closer because it is usually just the father, mother and children in the household and they develop affection and love for each other because they are together all the time.

Disadvantages of nuclear family systems

- there is no extra help around to share in living expenses and household chores and raising the children. - Both parents may not be able to work because somebody has to stay at home and take care of the children. - Family may not be able to improve its standing and wealth because there is only one income.

Stridharma

- women's code of conduct - How to be a good wife, daughter-in law and mother - Must place family needs above your own - Do not act against wishes of others in your household

Indian notions of child development

-Ayasu: - fixed life span -Given at birth -potentially bad sign to be precocious -Buddhi: - Reasoning ability or judgement - Importance of knowing kinship terms -Prakrti: - One's inherited constitution - Children should grow at their own pace Dristhi: - to see, sight - Rapid development is not desirable - avoid evil eye -blackbeads, bindi

How women's roles and status change over the lifecourse

-Wife, mother, sister -in general, women have little to no power in family Ways she gains power: -having a child, especially son -becoming mother-in-law- has more say, bosses daughter-in-law

British attitude toward child neglect and infanticide Act

-against female infanticide -create dowry funds -criminalize female infanticide -create programs to support females - conferences -dowry prohibition act, 1961 -prohibits payment or acceptance of dowry -1983, amended to include dowry violence - They passed the Female Infanticide Act in 1870, banning this practice, but waited 100 years to do this after it was first discovered in 1770.

Importance of being presentable

-concept surrounding the body in neoliberal India -assumption that individual sought to work on their appearance to be presentable was "gradual but definite trend" -looks are not as important, as presentable -well-groomed, goes to gym, has good personality -Bad for presentability are such things as: -potbelly, being overweight, bad skin, balding, bad hairs, oiled hair, fondness for loud colors,

Lamb's discussion of aging and attachments

-elders start detaching from pleasures of life -family, friends, possessions -if soul is attached, the soul might turn into a ghost. If detached, it'll move on -the people, Bengali, identified aging after their children get married and weakness, not so much by age -children have moral obligation to take care of their parents Maya = illusion, meas love, compassion, attachment, ties -ties that bond juniors and seniors across generations -bodily connections -a net, strands of which were composed of shared bodily substance and emotional attachment (love, compassion)

Normative social biography for a women

-gain power in family -normative social biography mandates childbearing after marriage -with son, you gain daughter-in-law -gives you more say in family matters - Woman's sacred duty - "Natural" for a woman to want to have children -improves woman's status - Couples are typically given 1-2 years after marriage before pressure from family members begins to have children.

The "modern" child in Kerala

-high suicide rates -highly consumers, more money, smaller family -high stress in education system -one child, didn't learn how to share -traditionally, shared with other in joint family -people can't adjust

Child rearing to foster interdependence

-naming at a later date -delay breast feeding, continue bathing even child cries -attention from family, not just mother - Interdependence means not emphasizing being a unique individual. Learning to be part of the family, learning to cooperate. - Not being called an individual name also helps a child fit into a family, as a member of the group. Called 1st, 2nd, or 3rd son or daughter.

Experience of widowhood in India

-property to other people -rural area: older women, no jewelry, plain, no bindi - Sarah Lamb: elderly, maya -seclude, minimize attachment to household -bland food, not to provoke emotion -curses a lot, distancing -giveaway possessions o No matter when widowed, women had to break ties with family - Wear only white clothing - Cannot remarry; can't talk to men outside the family - No longer part of her family - No social place or role in society - Without a husband or children have little meaning or purpose in life

Factors associated with unbalanced sex ratios in India

-unbalanced sex ratios: -more common in Northwest India and among higher castes -preference for boys -female infanticide -Female infanticide, sex selective abortion -female cost a lot -low status of women -decreasing fertility and consequent intensification of son preference -high female violence -dowry death and rape are on the rise Modern: -female feticide -1.5 million sex-selective abortions -technology has changed it, more widespread -ultrasound -abortion legal Why people preferred boys: - Boys stay with the family after they marry while girls leave the family when they marry. - Boys get jobs - Boys can perform religious rituals

Nichter, M. : The social life of yoga

Abstract: This paper draws on fieldwork at the K. Pattabhi Jois Ashtanga Yoga Institute KPJAYI) in Mysore, South India and in the surrounding community. The purpose of the paper is two fold. First, I describe the social life of yoga as experienced by global health tourists who arrive in India with an array of expectations, differing agenda, and an imaginary of India. Second, I provide observations about Indian entrepreneurs and cultural brokers who flourish on the edges of the yoga school and interface regularly with the foreign yoga students. Based on participant observation and in-depth interviews, I present a heuristic of Western yoga students in Mysore: (1) the yoga tourist or 'yoga lites', (2) the yoga traveler, (3) the yoga practitioner 'coming to the source', and (4) the yoga professional. These categories allow me to draw attention to the heterogeneity and complexities of the transnational flows of yoga students and to highlight ruptures and frictions in these flows. I also discuss briefly the practice of yoga in cosmopolitan India among middle class women. (225) The journey to India, as described by these yoga travelers may be considered a secular ritual that serves as a counterpoint to everyday life or as a personal transition or rite de passage at a particular point in one's life12. In addition to the relaxation that comes from settling in to a place for a period of time, the yoga traveler may also seek this experience in an effort to see themselves from a different perspective. (231-232) Some of the yoga practitioners who had come 'to the source' made interesting observations about cultural and gender differences they observed among Ashtanga Yoga students both from their own country and from other regions of the world. While I recognize the need to be cautious about essentializing cultural difference, interview data revealed some interesting, if preliminary, observations about how people from different countries responded to Ashtanga Yoga. Several informants talked about how Ashtanga Yoga seemed to match an aspect of their national character, resulting in its popularity. For example, Jenna from Finland observed: Ashtanga [Yoga] is very popular in Finland because it is a highly structured practice. Finns practice it precisely. They do their breathing and the āsana - they can focus on that. We like someone to tell us what to do and we like to follow. We listen carefully, we concentrate on that strictly, we do what we are told. Ashtanga [Yoga] suits us well. (234) For some students, particularly North American males, the nature of the guru-śiṣyā relationship was uncomfortable. John, a Canadian student, captured this skepticism in his observations of the śālā. While he enjoyed the practice of Ashtanga Yoga and felt he was on a 'spiritual quest', he could not relate to what he observed was the 'blind belief' of other students. Raised an atheist, John was dismayed by others who he felt were enthralled with a yoga guru and a foreign belief system. I don't feel comfortable with the way people are with Sharath... the idea that this is the only way, the only yoga, that it's so exclusive. I didn't like signing a waiver not to practice any other yoga here in Mysore, and I feel uncomfortable when I see people bowing at the door as they enter and leave the śālā. Just to be so captivated with a person or a belief system. I can't be that led. I have my own individuality. (236) In this paper, the desires, expectations, and social imaginaries of international health tourists have been explored in relation to the social life of yoga. Numerous global flows circulate into and within India in the arena of health and wellness tourism and myriad factors shape these flows. These flows of people, products, and ideologies are not '... convergent, isomorphic, or spatially consistent', but marked by asymmetries, instability, and fluidity.26 Through a close examination of the complex social life of yoga, I have explored transnational flows to reveal imaginaries, confluences, tensions, and frictions. (244) To this end, he notes that 'yoga... in the forms that we know it today in Asia and the West, is largely a product of modernity.'Ethnographic studies which explore and document the social life of yoga and the contexts in which it is being taught and practiced have much to tell us about how the East and West influence each other's identity projects in planned and unplanned ways. (250)

Difference between dowry and brideprice

Brideprice: - money from groom to bride's family Dowry: - is money and jewelry, gifts, etc. from bride to groom's family - for protection

Riessman, B. : Stigma & everyday resistance practices

Drawing on fieldwork and interviews from South India (Kerala), the author analyzes married women's experiences of stigma when they are childless and their everyday resistance practices. As stigma theory predicts, childless women deviate from the "ordinary and natural" life course and are deeply discredited, but contrary to Goffman's theory, South Indian women cannot "pass" or selectively disclose the "invisible" attribute, and they make serious attempts to destigmatize themselves. Social class and age mediate stigma and resistance processes: Poor village women of childbearing age are devalued in ways affluent and professional women avoid; differently situated women challenge dominant definitions and ideologies of family in distinctive ways. South Indian women are creating spaces for childless marriages within the gendered margins of families and culturally prevalent definitions of womanhood. The findings contribute to rethinking Western assumptions in Goffman's theory and suggest new directions for research on power and everyday resistance. (111) The institutional importance of motherhood in India cannot be overestimated, even as family life is undergoing change. The normative social biography for an Indian woman mandates childbearing after marriage. Motherhood is her sacred duty - a value enshrined in religious laws for Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs, and Christians alike. Bearing and rearing children are central to a woman's power and well-being, and reproduction brings in its stead concrete benefits over the life course: A child solidifies a wife's often fragile bond with a spouse in an arranged marriage and improves her status in the joint family and larger community; and with a child, she can eventually become a mother-in-law - a position of considerable power and influence in India families. In old age, women depend on children (particularly sons) for economic security in a country like India with few governmental social welfare programs, and upon death, a son makes possible the essential rituals for Hindus. (112) Economically privileged women are protected from coercive state policies and from the harsh comments poor women encounter at the local level. Their educational and occupational status, and the environments in which affluent women live, generally shield them from curious neighbors. Nevertheless, questions are sometimes asked ("Why the delay?") and derogatory comments made: "Certain people [neighbors] like to insult us by saying we are issueless." (119) "Yes, I go for functions. My husband's friends and all after marriage - there were four friends...all four are married, one got married recently. All three don't have children so we sit and console each other. When we go for relations' marriages certain people will say something and all, but I don't take it seriously." (120) "Women may know their oppression but choose not to speak out about it, judging the risk to be too great. They may do nothing or, operating stealthily in the interstices of power, they may resist through devious ways of speaking or acting." (122) Three general patterns of resistance can be identified. The first two practices involve transformative thoughts and actions in everyday life. The third - overt rejection of the motherhood mandate by the decision to remain childless - is of a different order. Like other resistance practices, however, it is transformative; it intentionally undercuts the ideology of compulsory motherhood. (122-123) "The thing is when you keep answering a question 25 times [How many children?] you know, you get irritated, you begin to feel you are different....It's the same thing with being single. They just can't accept it, something is wrong. How can you not want to get married?" (127) Married women in South India are defined and judged in relation to dominant family forms and associated gender ideologies, and these forms of power elicit patterns of resistance. There are many commonalities between South Indian and U.S. women and some clear differences. Social changes is expanding possibilities for women in India in general, and in families in particular, but women continue to be constrained by pronatalism - the ideology of compulsory motherhood. They are stigmatized when they cannot (or choose not to) be mothers. In a context of social change, however, married women are finding ways to sustain marriages without biological children - constructing families they seek to position alongside the other family forms evident in India today. (129)

Lamb, Sarah: Love and aging in Bengali families

Early on in my days in the West Bengali village of Mangaldihi, I met a woman called Mejo Ma, or "Middle Mother," sitting in the dusty lane in front of her home. She could not stop complaining about clinging. She worried that her ties to her children, to her grandchildren, to her own body, to the pleasures of this life were so strong that they would keep her soul shackled to her world beyond the appropriate time for moving on and dying. "How will I cut my ties to all these kids and things and go?" she lamented. Aging for Bengalis is defined not so much in terms of chronological years but rather via one's place in a family cycle. Most rural Bengalis do not keep careful track of or celebrate their birthdays; and few count the particular number of years passed in their lives as markers of identity or of life stage. It is the marriage of children, especially the bringing of a daughter-in-law into the home, that initiates the beginnings of the "senior" or "grown" life phase (buṛo bayas). Bodily changes— such as graying hair, weakening, and "cooling" 2— can also be regarded as signs of aging. It is at this point, when one's children are married and one's body has perhaps grown weaker and cooler, that seniors often shift to a new phase of life and place in the family. The family heads initiate their transition to becoming "senior"— often over a period of several years of competition and ambivalence— by gradually handing over the responsibilities of managing household funds, decision making, cooking, and reproducing children to sons (or a son) and their wives. In this way, the seniors move increasingly to the peripheries of household life. At the same time, the expectation is that their juniors will care for and serve them. Bengalis say that children have a profound social-moral obligation, in fact, to care for their parents in old age, in part because they owe their parents a tremendous "debt" (rṇ) for being produced and nurtured in infancy and childhood. The ties binding seniors and juniors across generations are part of what Bengalis call māyā. Maya is a polyvalent term found in all Indian languages, often translated by scholars as "illusion." In its sense as illusion, maya refers to the everyday, lived world of experience (known as samsāra in Sanskrit and samsār in Bengali)— a lived world that is not ultimate or everlasting (and is thus illusory) but which people feel very tied to and perceive in their daily lives as being "really real." In its more common, everyday sense for Bengalis, maya means love, attachment, compassion, or affection. A mother has maya for her child and a child has maya for her mother. Husbands and wives have maya for each other. People have maya for their homes, the plants they have tended carefully in their courtyards, the possessions they have gathered. People feel maya when they see a tiny calf bleating for its mother, or when a beloved sari is torn. If a grandmother calls her little granddaughter to her to feed her a sweet (even as she may lie dying), that is maya. When parents weep, seeing their newly married daughter depart to her husband's home, they are crying from maya. Bengalis offer several reasons for why maya tends to increase with the length of life. First, because the number of one's kin increases as life goes on, maya necessarily increases as well— for all of these kin. As Hena put it: "When you are young, you have maya and pull only for your mother, father, and older sister. But then when you marry, maya increases— for all of the people of your father-in-law's house. And then you have kids, and then they have kids. You see, from all of this, maya is increasing." "Look at Khudi Thakrun," she added. "Almost everyone in the village is her relative! She will never be able to abandon maya— never." One of the dangers of having such a lot of maya in late life is that it can make the process of dying very painful. One older woman, Mita's Ma, who was blind in one eye and lame in one leg, described the process of dying for a person with much maya as like pulling a deeply embedded thorn from the body. The emotional-physical ties of maya keep the soul, or āṭmā, literally "bound" to the body, making it difficult— emotionally and physically— for the soul to leave. Having a lot of maya in old age can also cause one to linger on in a decrepit body past the natural time for dying. People say in general that it is much better to die while still "moving" (calte calte), that is, while the body is still in good working condition, and that it is just maya that keeps some people vainly striving to preserve their naturally aging bodies through tools like false teeth, hair dye, and anti-wrinkle creams that are so popular now among the cosmopolitan elite. "What need do I have of such things?" one toothless woman said to me when I asked her about dentures. "They are just unnecessary forms of dressing up. It is now time for my body to go." Too much maya at the end of life can also cause the soul to linger on in frustration as a ghost around its former habitat, seeking vainly to be reunited with the scenes of its previous life. Still others did strive to cut maya, but felt ambivalent about the process. One man went on a pilgrimage expressly in order to diminish his worldly ties, but confessed to me on the way home, tears coming to his eyes as he sat next to his wife, "I left everything to come, but I couldn't leave her." Most admit that no matter how much one strives to reduce the bodily-emotional ties of maya in old age, maya cannot easily be cut. I have concentrated so far on village life, but I wish to look briefly at the phenomenon of old-age homes springing up in India's cities. Until the past few decades, old-age homes scarcely existed in India, save for a handful established by Christian missionaries, largely catering to the Anglo-Indian community and the very poor. Now there are hundreds across India's cities, the vast majority having been founded over the last fifteen years (Lamb 2009; HelpAge India 2002). I have concentrated so far on village life, but I wish to look briefly at the phenomenon of old-age homes springing up in India's cities. Until the past few decades, old-age homes scarcely existed in India, save for a handful established by Christian missionaries, largely catering to the Anglo-Indian community and the very poor. Now there are hundreds across India's cities, the vast majority having been founded over the last fifteen years (Lamb 2009; HelpAge India 2002). I was keen to understand how the residents felt about living in such a home, being part of a society in which it is so highly valued that seniors will be cared for by their children. Most expressed a relief that they had a place to stay and they were very grateful to the woman who had founded the institution. "It's better to be here than on the street," several commented. "I didn't like living in someone else's household," another said of her earlier years with her daughter and son-in-law. "I wanted to get away from the signs of my husband in my home," another explained, "after he died. Here [in Navanir], everything is open and empty— it gives some peace of mind."

Nanda, S.: Arranging a marriage in India

In India, almost all marriages are arranged. Even among the educated middle classes in modern, urban India, marriage is as much a concern of the families as it is of the individuals. So customary is the practice of arranged marriage that there is a special name for a marriage which is not arranged: It is called a "love match." (137) Impatiently, I responded, "Sita, I don't mean know the family, I mean, know the man. How can you marry someone you don't know personally and don't love? How can you think of spending your life with someone you may not even like?" (138-139) "If he is a good man, who should I not like him?" she said. "With you people, you know the boy so well before you marry, where will be the fun to get married? There will be no mystery and no romance. Here we have the whole of our married life to get to know and love our husband. This way is better, is it not?" (139) The basic rule seems to be that a family's reputation is most important. It is understood that matches would be arranged only within the same caste and general social class, although some crossing of subcastes is permissible if the class positions of the bride's and groom's families are similar. Although dowry is now prohibited by law in India, extensive gift exchanges took place with every marriage. Even when the boy's family do not "make demands," every girl's family nevertheless feels the obligation to give the traditional gifts, to the girl, to the boy, and to the boy's family. (139-140) "You Americans want everything done so quickly. You get married quickly and then just as quickly get divorced. Here we take marriage more seriously. We must take all the factors into account. It is not enough for us to learn by our mistakes. This is too serious a business. If a mistake is made we have not only ruined the life of our son or daughter, but we have spoiled the reputation of our family as well. And that will make it much harder for their brothers and sisters to get married. So we must be very careful." (142)

Chua, J. : Making time for children

In this article, I analyze the kinematic configuration of middle-class parenting practice and its association with suicide risk in Kerala as it emerges at the intersection of vernacular discourses of self-restraint, the growth of popular psychology, and the expansion of consumer aspiration with migration to the Persian Gulf and India's economic liberalization. In Kerala, the threat of consumer capitalism has been linked to the security of the population at large: in the battle against indiscrete materialism, the need to teach Malayali children to resist their desire for immediate gratification recasts the values of swaraj as no less than a matter of life and death. Self-control in this sense is the very key to the production of healthy, well-adjusted, and suicide-free citizens in India's liberalized economy. (114) Conspicuous consumption in contemporary Kerala is therefore understood to produce a particular kind of temporal subject in late capitalism, one envisioned as uniquely vulnerable to the temptations and dangers of accelerated material fulfillment given the slower and dissipated cadences of "traditional" social and economic Kerala life. Cast in the terms of historical vulnerabilities, the equation between suicide and the desire for immediate gratification obligates, according to mental health experts, critical psychologized interventions. Anxieties about at risk Malayali children unable to withstand how time variably fulfills, refuses, or frustrates desires and expectations motivate suicide prevention efforts that seek to recalibrate temporalities by promoting anti-impulsive endurance. I explore one technique advocated by mental health experts among their middle-class parent clients in Thiruvananthapuram: the strategic deployment of contingency and denial in the routine of daily life as a means of fortifying children's "frustration tolerance." Through exercises described by one clinical psychologist as "suicide inoculation training," parents are encouraged, for example, to play pragmatic, didactic games designed to teach children to defer their desire for and even willingly refuse everyday consumer items: a new pair of shoes or the seemingly innocuous second piece of chocolate. (115) In attributing Kerala's suicide crisis to the contemporary consumerist moment, mental health experts, state officials, and others reflected ideas about the threats of globalization that are mediated both by national economic transformations and regional imaginaries. Some narrated a historical and moral rupture from the temperance of Kerala's precolonial, developmentalist, or communist past to proclaim the dramatic and "unnatural" effects wrought by conspicuous consumption in the present. (118) Mapping a chain of events beginning with the competitive struggle between neighbors to outpurchase one another, and ending with piling loans and, ultimately, family-murder suicide, Dr. Aysha noted the endemic inability of Malayalis to restrain themselves in the face of today's material temptations: "In your country, you always know where, when, and how to act. If someone here is hungry, he may smell some food and become hungry. Even if his stomach may not be empty, his mouth may still salivate." Drawing parallels between different kinds of appetites, she observed: "In the same way, if we put a boy and girl together, they may feel like tasting! Our people cannot control themselves. If they feel hungry, they will eat immediately. We have not yet gotten that kind of education, to know how to control ourselves." (119) In resonant terms, both Dr. Aysha and Dr. Rekha attributed Kerala's suicides to the failure of Malayalis to undergo the historical experiences—indeed, the "education"—required to develop the self-control now crucial in an age of proliferating temptations. Narratives of a frugal, developmentalist, and isolationist past present Malayalis as never having wanted or aspired to more; yet as a result, neither had they learned to calibrate material desires. Kerala thus emerges in these imaginings as a place of missed developmental opportunity in a moral and psychological sense. In light of this perceived lack, suicide inoculation training seeks to induce in middle-class children the otherwise "natural" processes for learning the lessons of self-control. (120) Dr. Mary, a child psychologist, spoke of parents flooding her office with tales of their three- and four-year-olds who, when denied treats or scolded, threaten: "I'll go and die! I'll kill myself! I'll get myself knocked down by a bus!" (122)

Radhakrishnan, S.: Examining the "global" Indian middle class

Involvement with a global career gives women importance in the household Increases their decision making power Not only seen as earners but also highly capable (so increase their overall status) Heightened respectability at home and in community Despite economic success, women continue to define their role narrowly Mother's career supplements family but can't overtake it To appear respectable, must conform to patriarchal family Hold family above career

Personhood: sense of individuality vs the idea of a sociocentric self (Durkheim (organic vs mechanical solidarity); Dumont; Mines)

Mechanical Solidarity = a solidarity that comes from likeness -hunter-gatherer societies -all members have common and shared social experiences -homogeneity- little opportunity for individuality -each individual is directly and equally attached to society Organic Solidarity = more complex societies, formed by a system of different organs, each has a role -division labor becomes more specialized, individualism is inevitable -people need to depend on each other

Barbara Miller: Female infanticide & child neglect

Sitting in the hospital canteen for lunch every day, I can see families bringing their children into the hospital. So far, after watching for five days, I have seen only boys being carried in for treatment, no girls. When the hospital was built, equal-sized wards for boys and girls were constructed. The boys' ward is always full but the girls' ward is underutilized. (492) In one village, I went into the house to examine a young girl and I found that she had an advanced case of tuberculosis. I asked the mother why she hadn't done something sooner about the girl's condition because now, at this stage, the treatment would be very expensive. The mother replied, "then let her die, I have another daughter." At the time, the two daughters sat nearby listening, one with tears streaming down her face. When a third, fourth, or fifth daughter is born to a family, no matter what its economic status, we increase our home visits because that child is at high risk. These quotations, taken from field notes made during a 1983 trip to Ludhiana, the Punjab, India are indicative of the nature and degree of sex-selectivity in health care of children there. A thorough review of the ethnographic literature provides diverse but strongly suggestive evidence of preferential feeding of boys in North Indian villages, as well as preferential allocation of medical care to boys. Sex ratios of admissions to northern hospitals are often two or more boys to every one girl. This imbalance is not due to more frequent illness of boys, but rather to sex-selective parental investment patterns. (493) It seems clear that female infanticide in British India was widespread in the Northwest rather than of limited occurrence. (495) It is beyond doubt that systematic indirect female infanticide exists today in North India. It is possible that outright infanticide of neonates is also practiced, though nearly impossible to document due to the extreme privacy of the birth even and the great ease with which a neonate's life may be terminated. This section of the paper is concerned with indirect female infanticide, which is accomplished by nutritional and health-care deprivation of children, and which results in higher mortality rates of daughters than sons. There is a strong preference for sons in rural North India and there are several strong sociocultural reasons for this preference. Sons are economic assets: they are needed for farming, and for income through remittances if they leave the village. Sons play important roles in local power struggles over rights to land and water. Sons stay with the family after their marriage and thus maintain the parents in their old age; daughter marry out and cannot contribute to the maintenance of their natal households. Sons bring in dowries with their brides; daughters drain family wealth with their required dowries and the constant flor of gifts to their family of marriage after the wedding. Sons, among Hindus, are also needed to perform rituals which protect the family after the death of the father; daughters cannot perform such rituals. (496) The authors have found that there is a noticeable nutrient bias in favor of boys in the intrahousehold allocation of food. This unequal distribution has a seasonal dimension: in the lean season boys are more favored over girls in the distribution of food in the family, while in the surplus season distribution appears quite equal. (497) Infant mortality rates are, however, much lower in households with an educated mother than those where the mother has little education. Girls tend to receive less food than boys, and family variables are mentioned as being involved in this matter. (498) In 1980 an article published in Social Science and Medicine provided some evidence of the extent of the phenomenon based on clinic records in a large city of western India. In one hospital, from June 1976 to June 1977, 700 individuals sought prenatal sex determination. Of these fetuses, 250 were determined to be make and 450 were female. While all of the male fetuses were kept to term, fully 430 of the 450 female fetuses were terminated. This figure is even more disturbing in light of the fact that western India is characterized by a less extreme son preference than the Northwest. (499)

Readings in Mines and Lamb book & Susan Wadley: One straw from a broom cannot sweep

The Indian joint family is built upon the idea and reality that power comes through numbers, and that those who seek to be most powerful, especially in India's village communities, should remain in joint families in order to successfully sustain a family's honor and position. A second, but equally important, component of the success of joint families in practice is the training that children receive that marks their interdependence, their sense of belonging to a group that is more important than individual goals and aspirations. The ideal joint family is made up of a married couple, their married sons, their sons' wives and children (and possibly grandsons' wives and great-grandchildren), and unmarried daughters. In the community of Karimpur1 in rural Uttar Pradesh, some 150 miles southeast of New Delhi, some joint families extend to four generations and include more than thirty members. For Karimpur's landowning families, which are more likely to be joint than are poor families, separating a joint family is traumatic, rupturing family ties, economic relationships, and workloads, as well as necessitating the division of all of the joint family's material goods (land, ploughs, cattle, cooking utensils, stocks of grain and seed, courtyards, verandahs, rooms, cooking areas, etc.). Separation (nyare) is, in fact, most comparable to an American divorce. It also brings dishonor to one's family. The paradigm most frequently used to regulate social life in Karimpur is that of the ordered family, implying the authority of a male head, a number of adults working together under that authority, and respect for all of those higher in the family (or village) hierarchy. As in many north Indian communities, Karimpur residents use fictive kin terms toward all nonrelated village residents of whatever caste group; and traditionally, they have seen the village community as one family. Hence a woman who follows the laws and customs of her family will be controlled and bring honor to her family. A male gains honor by having land and wealth, by being kind to others, by keeping his word, and by having virtuous women who maintain purdah (seclusion). Families can lose honor through their women by having daughters or daughters-in-law who elope, become pregnant prior to marriage, or are seen outside too often. Men may bring dishonor to a household by stealing, gambling, drinking, and eating taboo foods, as well as by being unkind and miserly. A family also loses honor by not remaining joint, in part because control is easier in a joint family. Karimpur's residents believe that joint families are able to maintain better control of their members, especially young adults. Shankar, a Brahman male and village headman of Karimpur in the early 1980s, suggests that self-control, particularly sexual control, is more easily maintained in a joint family. Several aspects of joint family living relate to his remarks. First, as he notes, no one has his/ her own room or even space in the traditional household. In fact, through the 1960s in most joint families, the mother would assign sleeping places on a nightly basis; this gave her immense control over the sexuality of her sons and daughters-in-law. If she felt it appropriate, she would arrange for them to have a place where they could meet at night. For example, a woman should speak only in a whisper, if at all, to her husband's father or older male relatives. A man should not talk with his wife in front of his parents, nor should he do anything disrespectful before his father (such as smoking a cigarette). A woman should keep her face covered before all men senior to her husband, and she should not leave the family home unless accompanied by another woman or male relative and her head and body are covered by a shawl. The yearly ritual calendar is filled with celebrations in which women pray for healthy sons, for longliving husbands, and for their brothers. There are no annual rituals where they pray for their mothers or daughters. Finally, a Hindu wife should never eat a meal before her husband and other male relatives have eaten as this would be enormously disrespectful: the result is that women often eat late at night, after the last men have returned from the town or fields. If the family stays together, its power increases. One young Brahman man used the imagery of a broom to explain the need for a large, cooperating family: "Say there is a broom. If you have one straw separate, it can't sweep. But when all are together, it can sweep." The unity of the joint family depends, too, on the wife's first duty being to her parents-in-law, not to her husband. Without fear, according to Karimpur residents, there can be no control, and elders in one's family have the right and duty to "cause understanding." Similarly, those who are senior in the village can beat "understanding" into those of lower status. But even in the joint families, other forms of "separation" are now occurring. Karimpur families are becoming increasingly couple-oriented and challenging the authority of their elders. One manifestation of this change is the use of space. In 1968, only one couple, a young Brahman and his wife, had their "own room"— and only over the strenuous objections of the man's mother. But by the 1980s, many couples in joint families were allocated their own space to set up and use as they liked. This space, often a room of their own, was clearly off-limits to the mother-in-law, who thus lost her control of her son's sexuality. - Element of control in joint families (p.16) o Silencing of women o Purdah o Rituals which mark superiority & importance of men in the family o Eating after one's husband - Strict hierarchical rules are enforced in joint families o Sons respect fathers and older brothers o Obey their mothers (closer relationship) o Daughters-in-law are under the wing of their mother-in-law (cooking) o Husband's "job" s to make the wife understand what her "duties" are in the joint family - Strength of the family depends on unity of the household, just as the strength of the community depends on unity of leadership and members - Education, migration, and consumerism all put stress on the united family and the united village.

George, A : Newly married adolescent women in India

This paper explores the ways in which newly married working-class adolescent women of Mumbai, India deal with their marital sexual experiences to transform their bodies from a body-for-others to become also a body-for-self. (207) The tensions in the situation of newly married adolescent women are twofold. First, through marriage and its inherent expectations of sexual activity and reproduction as it occurs in Indian patriarchal and patrilocal cultures, women experience their bodies as out of their control; their bodies become a body-for-others. Yet, by using their bodies in culturally expected ways through participation in sexual activity and reproduction, and thereby acquiring personal honour, women can make their bodies a body-for-self. It is in the newly married state, a state of transition from virginal adolescence to married adulthood that these tensions are worked out primarily on and through the bodies of women. (208) The institutional importance of heterosexuality and marriage in India cannot be overestimated even as ideas about these social institutions are undergoing change. The normative social biography for an Indian woman mandates marriage, sexual activity and childbearing, regardless of her class, caste and religious affiliation....Bearing and rearing children are central to a woman's power and well-being; sexual activity and consequent reproduction hold the potential to solidify her bond with her spouse, improve her status in the joint or extended family and eventually as an older woman and mother-in-law, to wield power and influence in the family. The period of being a newly married woman, which may last several months or years, is a time when women begin to appreciate that their sexual activity and reproductive capacities are an important source of power, especially when they lack it from other sources. (208) Chastity, virtue and above all purity are extolled as feminine virtues embodying the honour of family, community and nation. On the other hand, there also exist deeply ambivalent views towards sexuality and womanhood. (209) Briefly stated, these ideologies suggest that an ideal woman is expected to be co-operative and obedient in her married household, slow to offer opinions and able to endure difficulties. Through her gestures, posture, and appearances, she should be chaste and monogamous and deflect attention away from herself and her body. Ideally, married women are expected to bear children, preferably sons. (210) Thapan (1997b) suggests that a woman's experience of her body is largely that of shame. Discourses about sex in this working-class Mumbai community were contradictory, associated with pleasure and shame. (213) Participants of the in-depth interview study spoke about feelings of fear. Ignorance or uncertainty about exactly what sexual relations entails created fear in a number of women. Imrana expressed this concern as follows. "Nobody told me anything [about sex]. They thought that as I am so old, I must know everything but I did not know much, that is, what exactly happens. But, girlfriends talk among themselves and they say that this happens, that happens. We feel scared, I mean, a type of fear, that what will happen, how will it happen?" (214) Women are largely pragmatic about sexual intercourse because of its links to conception and motherhood. The notion of body for self/others was particularly evident when women spoke of their anxieties regarding conception within a short time after marriage. The following excerpt from the focus group discussion study indicates newly married women's concerns about conception and childbirth soon after marriage. "If the first child is born then there is no fear. If a child is not born after 2 or 3 years of marriage then the in-laws start cursing. They think that the woman must be having some fault. If she gets child her natal family members are relieved. They say, 'she has happily started a family'. Otherwise in-laws are going to harass her, tell her she has some fault in her." (216) It will be clear from the evidence cited, that the practices of sexual intercourse are socially and collectively mediated through shared 'normal' practices which discipline, train and socialize newly married, sexually active women to become 'normal' wives. They are disciplined through repeated bodily experience into the realm of what is possible, namely when, how and to what extent they can consent o or resist bodily sexual experiences. (217)

Laypersons' Ideas about dosha - symptoms

Vata: aching, swelling Pitta: burning Kapha: itching, coughing, excess phlegm (mucus) in body

Important qualities when looking for a bride

- Homely - educated, but not too educated - not too independent - global, but traditional


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