HDE 12: Chpt. 13 - Attraction, Love, and Communication

it will help people feel comfortable within their own limits.

A clear sense of boundaries are important in sexuality because...

conflict-avoiding

A couple that seems to make light of their differences instead of trying to resolve them and let it go falls into which of Gottman's problem-solving styles?

contempt

A husband tells his wife that she is fat and then engages in body language to mimic how slow she walks around the house. He is engaging in which of Gottman's destructive tendencies?

active

A(n) _____ listener is someone who both listens to and is genuinely interested in what the other person is saying.

stonewalling

According to Gottman's theory, which of the four negative relationship strategies is usually the last straw?

millions of years ago.

According to Helen Fisher, the way in which we instantly size up a potential mate likely developed...

women

According to one study, which gender prefers a narrower set of sexual terms for communication, such as penis, vagina, and making love?

very masculine.

After the Stonewall Riots in 1969, gay men were portrayed as...

11

Around _____% of people claim that their relationships were love at first sight.

mania

As defined by John Lee, lovers that are best described as jealous, possessive, and obsessive are termed _____ lovers.

age 9 or 10

At about what age, for boys and girls, do traditional arousal and sexual responses usually begin?

describes how an adult's love and relationship patterns developed over time.

Attachment theory, while typically framed in the context of infant-caregiver relationships, is useful in discussing adult love because it...

being honest.

In saying no, the best practice is...

heterosexual "masculine" men.

In the 19th century, it was generally believed that homosexual men were effeminate and could only be attracted to...

members of other wealthy families.

In the United States, people from wealthy families tend to marry...

poor health and lower class.

In today's society, we associate overweight people with...

They will have even stronger attraction for each other.

James and Michelle have just about everything in common. According to the similarity-attraction hypothesis, what will happen in their relationship?

colors

John Alan Lee refers to the love styles in his theory as "_____ of love."

pragma

Priya approaches dating by focusing on choosing a partner who can earn a lot of money and who will be acceptable to her family. According to John Lee's theory, Priya is demonstrating which style of love?

unusual or exotic to them.

Psychologist Daryl Bem theorizes homosexual men and women are attracted to what is...

repair mechanism.

Reminding your partner that you admire, respect, and empathize with them even though you do not agree is an example of a(n)...

communication

Sexual _____ serves a variety of purposes, including signaling initial sexual and romantic interest and exploring a sexual connection with a standing partner.

fantasies sexual motivation sexual nature physical attraction

Sexual scripts help people to deal with several psychological phenomena. According to your text, which of the following phenomenon can be helped by knowing about sexual scripts?

younger women being with older men

Society responds more favorably to which of the following?

halo

The _____ effect is the tendency to think of someone we perceive to be attractive or beautiful in positive terms.

matching

The _____ hypothesis suggests that people select romantic and sexual partners based on the other person's attractiveness.

nonlove.

The absence of commitment, intimacy, and passion is known as...

commitment.

The difference between romantic love and consummate love is that romantic love lacks...

communication privacy management theory.

The idea that the revelation of private information in a relationship has the potential to leave individuals feeling vulnerable or resentful regarding the shared information is known as...

greater

The similarity-attraction hypothesis suggests the more similar two individuals are, the _____ (greater/lesser) the attraction between them will be.

True

True or false: Each of Gottman's four horsemen paves the way for the next one to arrive, and eventually a relationship that experiences them may be on its way to ending.

False

True or false: Sexual communication serves to facilitate explicit conversations about sexual preferences within a sexually active couple, but little more.

criticism

Unanswered complaints turn into ______ , according to Gottman.

fearful

What attachment style in adult relationships is characterized by a person who has highly negative views of both self and others?

state of mind

What factor usually weighs in on how a partner will say no?

It disappears quickly.

What happens to infatuation without intimacy or commitment?

matching hypothesis

What is defined as the suggestion that people select romantic and sexual partners based on the other person's attractiveness?

repair

What mechanisms are needed when people are frustrated and angry during discussions?

cultural gender roles

What provides people with expectations and behaviors about attraction, flirting, romance, courtship, and lovemaking?

smell

What sense has been linked to hormonal sexual arousal?

round or plump

What was the attraction standard for women until World War I?

stonewalling

When a conversation occurs and the other parter disengages and just refuses to listen or interact, it is known as _____ in Gottman's theory.

after the real person surfaces and flaws become known

When does lust tend to dissipate?

emotion work.

When individuals attempt to change in degree or quality of emotion or feeling, this is known as...

sexual scripts.

When our actions are constructed into something that guides our actions internally and interpersonally, these sexual characteristics are referred to as...

defensiveness

When two couples deny responsibility and make excuses, they are most likely engaging in which of Gottman's destructive behaviors?

All of them predict success.

Which of Gottman's problem solving styles in marriages tend to predict the future success of a relationship?

validating

Which of Gottman's problem-solving styles is exemplified by a "agree to disagree" style and respect for the emotions?

It has been written about by poets and philosophers for generations. It happens, though it is rare.

Which of the following accurately describes love at first sight? (Check all that apply.)

Attractive people are more often promoted in the workplace. Infants as young as 6 moths prefer looking at a more attractive face.

Which of the following are among research findings about physical attractiveness? (Select all that apply.)

stature form of noses color of skin tones weight

Which of the following are characteristics that African Americans have, historically, used to judge beauty? (Select all that apply.)

eye contact proximity touch vocal nuance and volume

Which of the following are common non-verbal mechanisms?

inequality selfishness incompatibility

Which of the following are commonly cited reasons relationships tend to end? (Select all that apply.)

intimacy passion commitment

Which of the following are elements of Sternberg's triangular theory of love? (Select all that apply.)

mockery insults and name calling hostile humor

Which of the following are examples of contempt in a relationship, according to Gottman's theory?

sexual fear lack of sex information negative beliefs about sex

Which of the following are obstacles that would block efficient conversations about sexuality? (Select all that apply.)

cross-complaining denying responsibility repeating yourself

Which of the following are signs of defensiveness, according to Gottman? (Select all that apply.)

defensiveness criticism stonewalling contempt

Which of the following are the four horsemen in a relationship according to Gottman?

to repeat a verbal message using an assist

Which of the following is a function of non-verbal communication?

Be supportive and express positive regard for the other person.

Which of the following is a generally accepted tip to improve listening skills between partners?

Pick a neutral time and place to talk.

Which of the following is a good tip to improve communication skills?

Tom shares that he has had 25 partners and feels insecure.

Which of the following is an example of communication privacy management theory?

overcoming obstacles. creating greater trust. evolving intimacy and communication.

Which of the following is associated with the importance of attachment styles? (Select all that apply.)

The three elements of love can be combined in many different ways.

Which of the following is correct regarding Sternberg's triangular theory of love?

sexual attraction and lust

Which of the following is likely in place in a short-term relationship scenario?

family planning and mutual interests

Which of the following is most likely in place in a long-term relationship scenario?

better metabolism

Which of the following is not a benefit that middle and upper-class people have in life?

writing a poem

Which of the following is not a commonly used non-verbal communication form in relationships?

Non-verbal communication guides us in all of our dating scripts.

Which of the following is not a function of non-verbal communication?

Have electronic discussions.

Which of the following is not an effective way to improve communication skills?

Attractive people have more money and happiness always than unattractive people

Which of the following is not true about attractiveness?

sexual prowess

Which of the following relationship variables has little association with attachment?

beauty and sexiness

Which trait(s) in the LGBTQ community may not be the same as the mainstream heterosexual community?

secure

Which type of attachment is associated with trust, commitment, intimacy, and self-confidence?

Needs are expressed with complaining.

Why is complaining a healthy factor in relationships?

ludus

With which of Lee's styles of loving are men most likely to associate?

storge pragma

With which of Lee's styles of loving are women most likely to associate? (Select all that apply.)

Storge

_____ , as defined by John Lee, is a love that generally begins with friendship, and is based on a deep affection rather than a hot passion.

Agape

_____ , as defined by John Lee, is a type of love that is chaste, patient, and altruistic. It is sometimes thought of as traditional Christian love.

Nonverbal

_____ communication is the type of communication that takes place even in silence through a variety of physical means.

Attachment

_____ theory says that love is a close, enduring emotional bond that is rooted in infancy.

criticism

"You never want to spend time with me!" is an example of a _____ in Gottman's theory.

culture.

Being dominant or submissive tend to be influenced by...

interest in a potential partner.

Flirtatious behavior often conveys...

Many people do not like using attraction as the primary motivation for initiation of intimate relationships.

How do most people feel about the idea of using attraction as the primary motivation for initiation of intimate relationships?

lower levels of relationship satisfaction

How would research predict the relationship success of a verbally outspoken female paired with a verbally inhibited male?

average attractiveness.

If a person considers themselves to be of average attractiveness, then the matching hypothesis predicts that they will seek out a partner of...

complementarity.

If it were true that opposites attract, that would be known as...

unhealthy.

In 1900, women thought men who were thin were...

masculine

In a 2000 study conducted by Daryl Bem, lesbians reported being more ______ than straight girls growing up.

long nose

In a historical beauty sense, what type of nose would an African American prefer on another African American?

disrespectful.

In cultures other than the United States, many consider eye contact while speaking to someone to be...

both partners.

In healthy relationships, important decisions about major life events are handled by...

6

Lee's styles of love theory has how many major categories?

physical attraction and fantasy.

Lust is based solely on...

to interject fun and enthusiasm in a relationship

Many established relationships use flirting for what reason?