Interpersonal Comm Final

reactance theory

how individuals react when their freedom to choose is restricted.

manifestations of jealousy

Cognitive- Suspicious thoughts, worries Emotional- Feeling sad, fearful Behavioral- Confronting other, questioning partner

conflict styles (CACAC)

Competing, avoiding, collaborating, comprimising, accomodating

Communication Stages of Disengaging Relationships

Differentiating Disintegrating Stagnating Terminating

explanations for jealousy

Evolutionary perspective Adaptive significance Paternity confidence (male jealousy) Mate selection (female jealousy) Self-evaluation maintenance theory Occurs when comparisons are made Comparisons on important dimensions

Dialectical Tensions in Relationship Breakup

Termination vs. continued connection Initiator vs. caretaker Openness vs. closedness

committed relationship types

Traditional (about 20%) Independent (about 22%) Separate (about 17%) What about the other 40%?

value stage

attachment due to value/belief similarity

stimulus stage

attraction to physical appearance

P variables

attributes of person evaluating the other includes: expectations, social skills

O variables

attributes of the person being evaluated includes: physical attractiveness, personality

E variables

attributes of the physical and social environment includes: proximity, pleasantness

cross complaining

both partners are complaining, one about a and the other about b, so they never solve one problem but complain about both

role stage

commitment due to successful performance of relationship roles

components of conflict

communicative acts of each person meanings the two have for their relationship meanings attatched to these acts by each person

2 types of conflict

content, relationship

sources of conflict

control over resources, preferences and nuisances, values, beliefs, nature of the relationship

gottman's 3 patterns that predict divorce

criticism, defensiveness, contempt, stonewalling

early stages: unproductive conflict communication

cross complaining, negative climates

social groups shape the meaning of behaviors with

cultural differences, social communities

conflict definition

disagreement among or between connected individuals when people who depend on each other express different views, interest or goals they percieve as opposing

responses to conflict

exit, neglect, loyalty, voice

attributions

explanations for why something happened

Barriers that can increase attraction

external barriers, barriers within the relationship

behavioral independence

frequent, strong, diverse, enduring

couple types

hostile/engaged hostile/detached

Knapp's interaction theory

initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, bonding

need fulfillment

intimacy, being nurturing, assistance, reassurance of own worth

middle stages: unproductive conflict communication

kitchen sinking, frequent interruptions

Adjudication

litigation, lawyers, judges are important. Third party makes decisions for the couple. members of the couple lose some power, a competitive process, a win lose mentality

principles of conflict

natural, covert/overt, passive agression

divorce mediation

neutral third party helps couple resolve differences. transition from one form of the relationship to a new one, mediator helps partners participate in negotiation to create desirable outcome for both parties.

assumptions of divorce mediation

people make better decisions for themselves than do outsiders, people are more likely to abide by rules they helped to create, trained mediators are necessary to help, both parties must assume responsibility for failed marriage

distress maintaining attributions

positive behaviors are external, negative are internal

relationship enhancing attributions

positive behaviors are internal, negative behaviors are external

relational culture

privately developed and executed system of understandings that coordinate attitudes, actions, and identities of partners

magic 5:1 ratio

ratio of positive to negative interactions positively expressed by showing interest, being affectionate, thoughtful, etc.

social exchange model of relationship development

rewards and costs, expectations, alternatives, investments

characteristics of individuals in relational cultures

richness, efficiency, uniqueness, pacing, openness, spontaneity, evaluation

indicators of relational culture

rules, personalized language

theories of relational development

stage, social exchange theory, dialectical theory

Stimulus value role theory of relational development

stimulus stage, value stage, role stage

factors affecting conflict

time, gender, children

Gottman's 3 styles of successful couples

validating, avoiding, volatile

P x O variables

variables that are unique to the relationship between O and P similarity between P and O Complementary between P and O reciprocal liking

self serving bias

your motives are good, theirs are bad

jealousy

An aversive emotional experience characterized by feelings of anger, sadness, and fear, induced by the threat or actual loss of a relationship to a real or imagined rival

cohabitation

Has increased 900% in the past 50 years 70% of women aged 30-34 have cohabitated 2/3 of marriages occur among couples who cohabitated Predicted by length of time in the relationship Differences according to education

Relational power

Weaker, less involved partner induce jealousy in other Effort to gain power in the relationship

constructive conflict comm

early stages middle- bracketing later- contradicting

functions of relational culture

establish boundaries between us and others regularizes our intentions

later stages: unproductive conflict communication

excessive meta communication