Intimate Relationships Exam 5

Which personality variable is most associated with jealousy? p. 318, ppt

Neuroticism

What is the foolproof method for detecting humans lying?

there isn't one

Are apologies helpful in forgiveness? p. 336

yes but only if the apology is sincere

According to the Deception video, by what age have we learned to lie?

4 years old

According to the research of DePaulo, what percentage of people report telling NO lies in the previous week? p. 327-328

5%

Which attachment style is least related to jealousy? p. 318, ppt

Dismissing style of attachment

What is reactive jealousy? How does it differ from suspicious jealousy? p. 316, ppt

Reactive- when someone becomes aware of an actual threat to a valued relationship Suspicious- when one's partner has not misbehaved and one's suspicions do not fit the facts at hand

Who makes us jealous? p. 318, ppt

Romantic rivals with a high mate value who make us look bad by comparison

What is forgiveness? What does it involve doing? p. 335

a decision to give up your perceived or actual right to get even with, or hold in debt, someone who has wronged you, involves acknowledging harmful conduct and the harmed partner extends undeserved mercy

If someone wants their betrayal to do the least harm to the relationship, they should do what? p. 333-335.)

acknowledging that the betrayal was harmful and asking for forgiveness

What are the characteristics of the "avoiders," "hostiles," "validators," and "volatiles?" p. 356-358

avoiders- mild, rarely argue, dislike confrontation hostiles- too much criticism, contempt, defensiveness, withdrawal validators- polite fighters, calm, understanding volatiles- frequent passionate arguments

What are microexpressions?

brief flashes of truth in facial expressions

What are coercion, legitimate, referent, expertise power? p. 368-369

coercion- the ability to bestow punishment on someone else legitimate- partners believe they have a reasonable right to tell the other what to do, and the partner has an obligation to comply referent- when a partner adores you and wishes to do what you want because it connects them to you expertise- when a partner recognizes your superiors knowledge and experience and are influenced by you because you know more than they do

Those who lie to others can begin to perceive the recipients of the lies as less honest and trustworthy. This is called .... p. 328

deceiver's distrust

In forced choice questions, women report they would react more to the threat of ______ infidelity and men report they would react more to the threat of ______ infidelity. p. 321

emotional, sexual

What is attributional conflict? p. 347

fighting over whose explanation is right and whose account is wrong

What did Paul Eckman conclude from his research in New Guinea?

human expressions are evolutionary

What are social allergies? p. 346

hypersensitive reactions of disgust that seem out of proportion due to repeated exposure of small recurring nuisances

What most often gives away liars? p. 330

information from others, physical evidence, or confession

Which attachment style is most commonly associated with conflict? p. 343-344

insecure attachment styles

What are "integrative agreement" and "structural improvement?" p. 359

integrative- satisfy both partners original goals and aspirations through creativity and flexibility structural- partners get what they want, learn and grow to make desirable changes to their relationship, may result from turmoil

How are women judged when they are in positions of leadership? p. 370

more harshly than a man would be when straightforwardly telling others what to do

What is intimate terrorism? How does it differ from situational couple violence? p. 381

one partner uses violence as a tool to control and oppress the other, it is not tied to specific arguments and only one partner is being violent

What are dialectics? Be familiar with the different kinds of dialectics. p. 341-342.

opposing motivations in relationships that can never be satisfied because they contradict each other, personal autonomy and connection to others, independence and interdependence, openness and closedness, stability and change, integration and separation

Love is an example of which type of resource? What is a particularistic resource? p. 370

particularistic- resources valuable in some situations but not in others, may confer power to their owner only in certain relationships

Which theory views male jealousy as springing from the importance of insuring that children are their biological offspring? p. 319-320

paternity uncertainty theory

Who is most likely to get away with a lie? p. 330

people in an intimate relationship lying to their partner

What are different technologies used for lie detection?

polygraph, layered voice analysis, thermal imaging machine, laser doppler biometer

What is the Speaker-Listener Technique, and how does it work? p. 361-362

provides structure for calm and clear communication through interrupting the cycle of misperception and promoting active listening

What are illegitimate demands? With which phase of conflict are they associated? p. 345-346

requests that seem unjust because they exceed the normal expectations partners have for each other, beginning stage...rebuff

From an interdependency perspective, power is based on what? p. 368

resources each partner controls

What type of person is most likely to forgive? p. 336

secure attachment styles

Two important strategies for overcoming unwanted jealousy are self-reliance and .....? p. 326.

self-bolstering

What are constructive responses to betrayal? p. 331

sincerely apologize and forgive

Structural improvement, integrative agreements, compromise, and domination are associated with which stage of conflict? p. 350

termination

What is social power? p. 365

the ability to influence behavior of others and resist their influence on us

How does spouses' shared decision making tend to affect their marriage and the likelihood of divorce? p. 378

the more equal the decision making, the happier the couple and the lower the likelihood of divorce

Which factors have been found to influence the tendency of some women to stay in abusive relationships? p. 390-391

they don't think they will be better off if they go, romantic norms encourage them to forgive and forget, they ask themselves why they made him angry or why they were in the wrong place at the wrong time, economic instability, cost of leaving is too high, fear of greater violence if they leave

Why women are better at understanding nonverbal behavior than men are? p. 374-375

they gain valuable information that helps them be better partners and that can then increase their influence over men..-Women are generally more accurate judges of others emotions and meaning than men are

Which behaviors are useful in mastering anger? p. 348

think differently and take a break from the situation to calm down

With regard to conflict, John Gottman advises men who want their marriages to work to do what? p. 360

try not to avoid conflict

According to deception experts, what is a main reason that people are not very good at detecting lies?

we want to believe what people tell us