Interpersonal Communication

Preoccupied Individuals

want intimacy and fear being alone

Gender Differences

Adrogynous - men and women who behave both masculine and feminine - Females who play traditional roles are more into macho guys

Reinforcement Model

Byrnes - attracted to similar others because they reinforce our view of the world as the correct perspective - people don't like when people challenge their attitudes

Personal Qualities

Framework for understanding attraction. personality, interpersonal needs, expectations, self-esteem, physical appearance, etc.

Other's Personal Qualities

Framework for understanding attraction. personality, needs, expectations, appearance, etc.

Burleson - Similarities

Good communicators are attracted to good communicators, poor communicators are attracted to poor communicators

Social Networks

If you meet someone you wana date, and your friends all say how wonderful she is, you'll be more attractive

Attitudinal Similarity

Many relationships form because of shared attitudes and beliefs - many find they have different likes and dislikes though

Sex Differences

Men are attracted to looks more than women.

Halo Effect 2

People associate good looks with a plethora of other positive qualities. What is beautiful is good - people believe hot people are more likely to be successful - offers the "complete package"

Self-Esteem

Those who have high ___ are more attracted to those who also have ___

"Hard-to-get"

Those who play hard to get are more attractive - has its benefits cut can be bad if they are viewed as unattainable

subjective norms

attitudes of members in our social circle

Growth Beliefs

based on the belief that impressions of others evolve over time, and that people and relationships grow when faced with challenges.

Destiny Beliefs

based on the idea that first impressions of others are fixed and enduring, and that people cannot change

Secure Individuals

comfortable alone and in relationships

Reinforcement Affect Model

certain types of environments make people feel certain ways. Soft music, walls, chairs often relaxes people - people unconsciously associate the feelings in the environment with the people there

Relational Attraction

desire to have an intimate relationship with a person

Task Attraction

desire to work with someone to fulfill instrumental goals

Koinophilia

faces are rated as more attractive when they have average features, with studies showing that a computer composite of multiple faces is perceived as more attractive than any single face

Fearful Avoidant Individuals

fear intimacy and lack self-confidence

Assimilation Effect

if you hangout with more attractive people, you are thought to be more attractive - some attention attractive people get spills over

Complementarity

liking and attraction is linked to behavior and resources, not attitudes and values

Physical Environment

location, size, temperature, public vs. private setting, etc.

Physical Attraction

looks, eyes, body, hair, attire

The Skill as a Culture

low skill communicators may be practicing skills the two partners think is competent

The Sour Grapes Explanation

low skill communicators might be attracted to high skill people but feel they are out of their reach

The Ignorance is Explanation

low skill people not always aware the people communicate better than they do. Since they communicate with similar others, they have low skill interactions

Reward Value

most powerful influence on attraction. Companionship, sex, fun, financial resources.

Fatal Attraction

occurs when very qualities that draw us to someone eventually contribute to our breakup - she is driven, she works too much

Interaction Appearance Theory

people are seen as more physically attractive if there are shared warm positive interactions

Excitation Transfer

people experience arousal together and mistake the feelings for excitment

Halo Effect

perceive physically attractive people as more sociable

Narcissism

personality trait that involves a pattern of grandiosity, self-focus, and self-importance

Types of Attraction

physically, sexually, intellectually, or relationally

Chemical Attraction

physiological and neurological aspects of the attraction process - OT (oxytocin) attraction chemical "the hormone of love"

Expectations

play a major role in the attraction process. Influence our perceptions of reward value. If ___ behavior is rewarding, it is likely to be more rewarding.

Dismissive Individuals

prefer to be alone and are unmotivated to develop and maintain new relationships

Attachment Style

reflect how people view themselves and their relationships with others. Four attachment styles....

Sexual Attraction

reflects the desire to engage in sex with someone - feelings of sexual arousal in the presence of someone

Qualities that Reflect Chemistry

similarities and differences that emerge when the two are together

Differential Importance Explanation

since low skill people do not communicate often, they may not be looking for a high skill partner

Physical Attractiveness

strong jawline, broad shoulders, tall men - soft jaw, hour glass shape women

Matching Hypothesis

the tendency to be attracted to people who are similar to us in physical attractiveness

Social Attraction

would like to "hangout" or be friends with someone.