BPOC Verbal Communication

physical

Officers who feel they are an integral part of their communities are less likely to resort to __________ force to resolve crisis situations that could be verbally diffused and de-escalated.

Liking

People prefer to say "yes" to those they like

Consensus

People will look to the actions of others to determine their own actions.

first

•Obviously, it depends on the nature of the communication or call. If the other person is in crisis, if the intent is to build rapport a _____ name may have an advantage.

Paraphrasing

•One of the most influential and important tools of communication •Put another's meaning into your words and delivering it back to them.

outside

•People who admit they have a bad attitude usually blame _______ forces.

always

•People will ______ argue with the police.

high

•People with ____ self-esteem admit mistakes; people with low self-esteem deny them.

Reasons for Escalation

•The officer's message is good, but the delivery failed •Authoritarian thought process •Lack of communication skill set •Deficient skill set •Sadly, emotional intelligence issues (examples: depression, anger, fatigue, worry) •"Contempt of Cop"

appreciation

•The power of ____________ cannot be underestimated or overemphasized.

Essential Elements of Communication

•Thought -something we know •Emotion -something we feel •Action -something we do

own

•We ____ our attitudes.

15%

•We remember less than ___ of what we hear

3 or 4

•You will find the vast majority of situations will take only _ __ _good questions (coupled with active listening) to gain control of that situation and de-escalate hostilities.

93%

•___ of communication is non-verbal

Talking

•_________ may be the greatest obstacle to effective communication.

Empathy

•_______is the psychological identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.

85-90%

•Humans remember _____ of what they see

stored

•If a question is asked, the brain will instinctively scan _______ data.

courtesy

•In today's fast-paced world, ________ is disregarded as time-consuming.

30/two

"First impressions matter. Experts say we size up new people in somewhere between __ seconds and ____ minutes

Profanity

•It should not be ignored •Rationally evaluate it •Is it a precursor to an attack? •Danger cues •Citizen's intent

40

•Less than __ percent signals disinterest, boredom, or dishonesty

want

All people _____ a second chance.

told

All people want to be ____ why they are being asked to do something.

asked

All people want to be ______ rather than told to do something.

given

All people want to be _______ options rather than threats.

dignity and respect.

All people want to be treated with _______ ___ _________

Maxwell's Four Components of Connection

1. What people see -Connecting Visually 2. What people understand -Connecting Intellectually 3. What people feel -Connecting Emotionally 4. What people hear -Connecting Verbally

Crises

A temporary state of upset and disorganization, characterized by an inability to cope with a particular situation using customary methods of problem solving (Kantor/University of Virginia)

minor, insignificant calls

Act as your best advocate. It is generally not major crimes or critical scenes that officers find themselves in communication trouble. It is the _____ __________ _____ for service, such as, children playing basketball in the street

Components of Active Listening

Active listening is a communication technique used in counseling, training, and conflict resolution. It requires that the listener fully concentrate, understand, respond and then remember what is being said. This is more than reflective listening where the listener repeats back to the speaker what they have just heard to confirm understanding of both parties.

communication

Active listening is the most important __________ skill of all. Without it no other technique or theory will work.

7%-38%-55%

Albert Mehrabian (born 1939 to an Armenian family in Iran), Professor Emeritus of Psychology, UCLA, has become known best by his publications on the relative importance of verbal and nonverbal messages. His theory has become known as the __ __ ___ Rule

90%

Amazingly, more than ____ of the impression we often convey has nothing to do with what we actually say.

Jim Glennon

Be Aware of people who attempt to gain a sense of importance by arguing with you, says ___ _______.

most

Communication is said to be the _____ important life skill one could possess.

Magic Phrase

Dale Carnegie

Though Emotion Action

Failure to include any one of the above three will develop in a disconnect/ breakdown in communication.

1. Hungry 2. Angry 3. Lonely 4. Tired

H.A.L.T.

Four Limited Connections with Communication

Immaturity Ego Failure to Value Everyone Insecurity

tells

In addition, the attacker _____ the officer he is going to do it.

low

It is obvious that poor or ___ EQ will significantly impair effective communication.

1. Listen Actively 2. Empathize 3. Ask questions 4. Paraphrase 5. Summarize

L-E-A-P-S

Consistency

Looking for and asking for commitments

beside

Most of the time when an officer gets attacked it is by someone standing right ________ him.

gestures, facial expressions, and body language.

Nonverbal communication is primarily conducted through the use of _________ ______ ___________ ___ _____ ________

•"That's thought-provoking, tell me more." •"That's interesting, why did you say that." •"That's intriguing, why did you do that." •"That's exciting, why did you ask that."

Not asking probing questions of other people:

•Reciprocity •Scarcity •Authority •Consistency •Liking •Consensus

Principles of Persuasion

•Verbal •Paralinguistic •"Nonverbal"

Remember, a person's message is found in the totality of:

two

Remember, you can't have an argument unless at least ____ people participate

Apathy

Simply defined as a lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern. Little emotional connection, the opposite of empathy.

emotions

The Institute of Health and Human Potential defines emotional intelligence as "the ability to recognize, understand, and manage our __________; and to recognize, understand, and influence the emotions of others."

without

The vast majority of all law enforcement arrests are made _______ the need to use physical control beyond routine handcuffing.

broadcast

They usually __________ the attack.

•Zoning out •You start to formulate a response •Plan of action •A way to fix it

Unconsciously you begin...

cognitions

When the emotional brain is running high, _________ generally run low.

nonverbal.

When there is conflict between one's words and the body language, believe the ________

Active listening

______ ______ is the process of carefully gathering information based on verbal and nonverbal observations. Your undivided attention is required.

contempt

_______ - the worst of the four horsemen - is poisonous to a connection because it conveys disgust.

Criticism

__________ is more global — it attacks the person, not their behavior.

•Benjamin Disraeli

___________ _______ said, "Talk to a man about himself and he will listen for hours."

Defensiveness

___________ just escalates the conflict, which is why it is so destructive. It shuts down cooperation and creativity. Remember defensive minds are neither creative nor cooperative.

Stonewalling

____________ - Tuning out. Disengaging.

Communication

______________ is a skill that you can learn. It is like riding a bicycle or typing

Advantages of Emotional Intelligence

a. Better communication and connections with others b. Controlling feelings & behavior (managing worry, anger, crisis) c. More accurate perceptions d. Better equipped to deal with unexpected stress e. Stronger relationships bonds f. Optimism increases

Basics of Human Interaction

a. Listening actively b. Asking questions c. Showing courtesy d. Engaging empathetically e. Observing non-verbal body language

Key Characteristics of Emotional Intelligence

a. Self-awareness of one's attitude, thinking attached to attitude, and behaviors b. Self-control c. Motivation and determination d. Social competency & empathy e. Understanding others f. Influencing others

Criticism Contempt Defensiveness Stonewalling

four horsemen

aware

•Empathy is a dual-level of consciousness, meaning, you are ______ of their cognition/feelings and yours at the very same time.

55

nonverbal __%

38

paralinguistic __%

Authoritarian

•Enforcing very strict obedience to authority. Much like an autocrat, or dictator, oppressive, tyrant

7

verbal- __%,

•a. Keep it simple •b. Ask a question •c. Follow up with more questions •d. Continue to actively listen •e. What you're conveying to this person is important •f. Since positive communication is occurring, they subconsciously associates you as a positive

•A question usually provokes some type of thought process.

Authoritative

•Able to be trusted as being accurate or true; reliable. •Commanding, self-confident; likely to be respected and obeyed

not

•Active Listening is ___ natural, it takes practice

defensiveness

•Arguments will create ______________.

60-70

•As a rule, make eye contact ______ percent of the time.

asking.

•Attempting to influence by telling is not nearly as effective as by _______

verbal, nonverbal, and paralinguistic.

•Communication can be broken down into its three components: ______ ______ __________

trigger

•Do not let the subject _______ you into an emotional reaction.