Chapter 6
What is very important in interpersonal communication, given that relationships between people are constantly changing?
Behavioral flexibility
Example of idiosyncratic/ symbolic rituals
Calling each other by a special name or celebrating the anniversary of their first date
Stability is a dialectic tension with
Change
An extrovert being friends with an introvert demonstrates which type of relationship?
Complementary
Empathy
Concern for others
Example of couple-time ritual
Exercising together or having dinner together every Saturday night
Integration is a dialectic tension with
Separation
Johari Blind area (II)
Information that is known to others but unknown to you
Johari Hidden area (III)
Information that is known to self but not known to others
Johari Open area (I)
Information that is known to you and to other people
Johari Unknown area (IV)
Information that is not known to yourself or others
Deceptive communication
The practice of deliberately making somebody believe things that are not true
Bargaining
The process in which two or more parties attempt to reach an agreement on what each should give and receive in a transaction between them
Self-Disclosure
The process of making intentional revelations about yourself that others would be unlikely to know and that generally constitute private, sensitive, or confidential information
Obsession, jealousy, gossip, and mental abuse are examples of
possible negative qualities of some interpersonal relationships
Disclosure tends to be
reciprocal
If two people in a relationship start to merge their social circles and purchase items together, they are exhibiting actions in the ______ stage
relational development
Disclosure generally increases as
relational intimacy increases
Friendships have changed over time largely due to
social media
Communication and relationship development are
symbiotic
negative disclosure is directly related to
the intimacy of the relationship
Interpersonal Communication
The process of using messages to generate meaning between at least two people in a situation that allows mutual opportunities for both speaking and listening
Argumentativeness
The quality or state of being argumentative; synonymous with contentiousness or combativeness
Compliance-resisiting
The refusal of targets of influence messages to comply with requests
Control
The speaker does not allow the second person to join in the discussion of how a problem should be solved
Relational Maintenance
The stage in a relationship after a couple has bonded and in which they engage in the process of keeping the relationship together
Relational Deterioration
The stage in a relationship in which the prior bond disintegrates
Dialectic
The tension that exists between two conflicting or interacting forces, elements, or ideas
Problem Orientation
To act as though you do not have the solution but to offer up multiple ideas
Description
To report observations rather than offering evaluative comments
Personal Idioms
Unique forms of expression and language understood only by individual couples
Evaluation
When an individual makes a judgement about another person or his or her behavior
Superiority
When the first person treats the second as a person of lower status
We may begin a relationship with someone based on how desirable that person is to work with in the classroom. This type of motivation is called
attractiveness
disclosure may be _____ for a variety of reasons
avoided
The need for inclusion
becoming involved with others
Behaviors that reduce defensiveness
-Description -Problem Orientation -Empathy -Equality -Provisionalism -Spontaneity
Behaviors that promote defensiveness in others
-Evaluation -Control -Neutrality -Superiority -Certainty -Strategy
Three basic interpersonal needs that are satisfied through interaction with others according to William Schutz
-The need for inclusion -The need for affection -The need for control
Motivations for terminating relationships
-hurtful messages -deceptive communication -aggressiveness -argumentativeness -defensiveness
Motivations for initiating relationships
-proximity -attractiveness -responsiveness -similarity -complementarity
Essential interpersonal communication behaviors
-using affectionate and supportive communication -influencing others -developing a unique relationship
Three essential features of bargaining
1. All parties perceive the possibility of reaching an agreement in which each party would be better off, or no worse off, than if no agreement were reached 2. All parties perceive more than one such agreement that could be reached 3. Each party perceives the others as having conflicting preferences or opposed interests
Compliance-gaining
Attempts made by a source of messages to influence a target "to perform some desired behavior that the target otherwise not perform."
Example of spiritual rituals
Attending services together or doing yoga together
Why is self-disclosure important?
1. allows us to develop greater understanding of ourselves 2. allows you to develop a more positive attitude about yourself 3. allows relationships to grow in depth and meaning
Steps to establishing a strong cross-cultural relationship
1. have meaningful personal interaction 2. maintain equal status 3. find ways to build interdependence 4. respect individual differences
Attractiveness
A concept that includes physical attractiveness, how desirable a person is to work with, and how much "social value" the person has for others
Examples of Johari Open area (I)
Approximate height, weight, and information you freely disclose such as hometown, major, age
Interpersonal Relationships
Associations between at least two people who are interdependent, who use some consistent patterns of interaction, and who have interacted for an extended period of time
A motivation for terminating a relationship by deliberately making somebody believe untrue things is labeled
Deceptive communication
Certainty
Denotes a lack of openness to alternative ideas
Rituals
Formalized patterns of actions or words followed regularly
Examples of intimacy rituals
Giving each other a massage or talking on the phone with each other before bed
Examples of daily routines and tasks
If living together, one partner always preparing dinner and one cleaning up after
Contradictions
In dialectic theory, the idea that each person in a relationship might have two opposing desires for maintaining the relationship
Example of patterns, habits, and mannerisms
Meeting her need of being complement before going out for a fancy evening and meeting his need to be reassured before family events
Hurtful messages
Messages that create emotional pain or upset
Spontaneity
Naturalness and lack of premeditation
Defensiveness
Occurs when a person feels attacked
Your childhood nickname and the pet name your significant other calls you are examples of
Personal idioms
Expression is a dialectic tension with
Privacy
Complementary Relationships
Relationships in which each person supplies something the other person or persons lack
Symmetrical Relationships
Relationships in which participants mirror each other or are highly similar
Example of communication rituals
Saying "I love you" before going to sleep
______ is fundamental to relationships
Self-Disclosure
Behavioral Flexibility
The ability to alter behavior to adapt to new situations and to relate in new ways when necessary
Aggressiveness
The assertion of one's rights at the expense of others and care about one's own needs but no one else's
Provisionalism
The communicator does not communicate certainty or a total conviction but is open to other ideas
Strategy
The employment of manipulative and premeditative behavior
Similarity
The idea that our friends and loved ones are usually people who like or dislike the same things we do
Complementarity
The idea that we sometimes bond with people whose strengths are our weaknesses
Responsiveness
The idea that we tend to select our friends and loved ones from people who demonstrate positive interest in us
Relational Development
The initial stage in a relationship that moves a couple from meeting to mating
Proximity
The location, distance, or range between persons and things
Neutrality
The originator of the message does not show concern for the second person
Symbiotic
affect each other both ways
Disclosure varies across ____
cultures
rational satisfaction and disclosure are _____ related
curvilinearly
Most relationships go through definable stages of
development, maintenance, and deterioration
Relational deterioration is marked by
differentiating behavior
Successful interpersonal relationships are based on _____
effective communication
Motivations for maintaining relationships
gender and cultural differences and satisfying relationships
The need for control
having the ability to influence others, our environment, and ourselves
The need for affection
holding fond or tender feelings toward another person
positive disclosure does not necessarily
increase as the relationship becomes more intimate
Cross-cultural relationships are _____ common
increasingly
Couple-time rituals help maintain long-term
interpersonal relationships
Social networking sites provide opportunities for
new kinds of interpersonal relationships
The quality of friendship is affected by
other psychological predispositions
Interpersonal relationships are important because
they fulfill our needs for inclusion, affection, and control
Interpersonal communication is the process of
using messages to generate meaning between at least two people in a situation that allows mutual opportunities for both speaking and listening