COMM Ch 11
long distance friendships are more likely to survive when
- two people feel a strong liking - friends accept change as natural - they have a sense of shared history
best friends
- typically same sex - greater intimacy, disclosure, and commitment than close friends - provide unconditional support - share substantial activities/experiences - provide identity support for each other's valued social identities
two types of friendship
1. best friends 2. cross- category friends
4 kinds of cross category friendships
1. cross-sex 2. cross-orientation 3. intercultural 4. interethnic
transitioning from friendship to romance
1. expect difference 2. emphasize disclosure 3. offere assurances
Friendship functions:
1. fulfills our need for companionship 2. help us achieve practical goals
three ways to cope with attraction
1. mental management 2. romantic involvement 3. friends with benefits arrangement
maintenance strategies for friends
1. sharing activities 2. self-disclosure
10 friendship rules
1. show support 2. seek support 3. respect privacy 4. keep confidences 5. defend your friends 6. avoid public criticism 7. make your friends happy 8. manage jealousy 9. share humor 10. maintain equity
maintain your long-distance friendships
1. use technologies like cell phones/email 2. remind each other of your affection 3. recount shared events/ experiences 4. show support during big life changes
Friendship is:
1. voluntary 2. driven by shared interests 3. characterized by self disclosure 4. rooted in liking 5. volatile
Euro-American men avoid expressions of
affection with other men
identity support
behaving in ways that convey understanding, acceptance, and support for a friend's valued social identities
the most commonly reported reason for ending a friendship
betrayal
cross-sex friendships
between men and women
cross category friends
cross demographic lines and defy friendship norms
friendships are most important for...
elderly
_______ helps manage grief
emotion-sharing
agentic friendships
focus primarily on achieving practical goals together
communal friendships
focus primarily on sharing time and activities together
cross-orientation friendships
friendships between LGBTQ people and heterosexual men or women
intercultural friendships
friendships between people from different cultures or countries
interethnic friendships
friendships between people of different ethnic groups
friendship rules
general principles prescribing appropriate communication and behavior within friendships
friendship wanes for...
married
people who regularly call and text their friends are
more likely to seek face-to-face encounters
male and female same-sex friendships are
more similar than different
the defining feature of friendship
self-disclosure
valued social identities
the aspects of you public self that you deem the most important in defining who you are (musician, athlete, dancer)