COMM. CH.9 ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS

What is the difference between liking and loving?

Liking is a feeling of affection and respect that we typically have for our friends. Loving is a deeper and more intense emotional experience consisting of intimacy, caring, and attachment.

bonding stage?

Marriage/ other formal commitment

Factors influencing attraction; What is the basis of equity in a relationship? What is the opposite of equity?

The balance of benefits and costs exchanged by partners is equal. inequity

Which effect is the beautiful-is-good-effect related to?

The halo effect

Key element of romantic relationships; communication?

There must be talking in the relationship

What is the definition of wedging in relevance to the dark side of romantic relationships?

Using online communication to come between 2 romantic partners

Key element of romantic relationships; Tensions? What must we arrange? and examples

We must arrange relational dialects; openness vs protection, novelty vs predictability

Factors influencing attraction; role of reciprocal liking?

We tend to be attracted to people who are attracted to us

Factors influencing attraction; How does proximity influence attraction?

We tend to be in romantic relationships with those near us

Factors influencing attraction; What role does similarity play in attraction? and what is this effect called?

We're attracted to those we perceive as similar to ourselves. Birds-of-a-feather-effect

Factors influencing attraction; importance of resources? and what major theory is behind this?

We're drawn to those offering benefits with few associated costs. The social exchange theory

What is the mere exposure effect?

You're more likely to be attracted to people who you are around a lot.

Initiating stage?

assess others' attractiveness/ availability

stagnating stage?

communication slows to a standstill; tense and awkward

Which type of love is common in long-term relationships?

companionate love.

Maintenance strategies; social networks?

involve yourself with partners' family and friends

What are the two types of romantic love?

passionate love and companionate love.

Which type of love is integrally linked for sexual desire in adults? (being IN love)

passionate love.

Maintenance strategies; assurances?

reminders of devotion; "I'll always love you"

differentiating stage?

small fights; differences are highlighted

Maintenance strategies; self-disclosure?

sharing thoughts, feelings, and fears

What are the four factors to predict whether to maintain a relationship?

1) degree to which you feel in love, 2) equity within the relationship, 3) similarity between partners, 4) Network support from family and friends

What is the ideal combination in terms of liking and loving for long term success?

Both partners like and love each other.

Key element of romantic relationships; perception?

Both partners must perceive their bond as romantic; must DTR

Key element of romantic relationships; commitment?

Have an attachment and an intention to continue the relationship

What was the major finding from Duton and Aron's "Bridge experiment"

Our bodies tend to confuse different types of arousal. Higher arousal = higher attraction. When actually experiencing physiological responses related to fear, people mislabel those responses as romantic arousal. This was interpreted by the researchers to mean that the men found the woman more attractive when they had more anxiety about crossing the bridge.

Maintenance strategies; positivity?

be cheerful and romantic; most important

Factors influencing attraction; What is the beautiful-is-good-effect?

beautiful people are seen as competent, intelligent, and well adjusted.

Key element of romantic relationships; diversity?

different people, same feelings; place the same degree of importance on the relationship

What are the 5 stages of coming apart?

differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, and terminating

avoiding stage?

distancing yourself physically

experimenting stage?

flirting; casual dating

agape lovers?

forgiving lovers; unconditional, selfless

Storge lovers?

friendly lovers; rooted in friendship, stable

ludus lovers?

game-playing lovers; players, uncommitted fun

Maintenance strategies; sharing tasks?

helping each other out with responsibilities

intensifying stage?

infatuation stage, self-disclosure, cuddling, "We"

What are the 5 stages of coming together?

initiating, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, bonding

What is passionate love and how is it related to relationship duration?

intense emotional and physical longing for union with one another. negatively; passion fades!

What is companionate love defined by?

intense form of liking defined by: EMOTIONAL INVESTMENT and DEEPLY INTERTWINED LIVES

integrating stage?

leave stuff at each others' place, "us", Sex

Maintenance strategies; relationship talks?

make time to discuss the relationship and really listen

What type of betrayal to men and women each view as worse?

men = physical infidelity women = emotional infidelity

What is relational intrusion?

monitoring/ controlling of partner; invasion of privacy

mania lovers?

obsessive lovers; crazy, intense

pragma lovers?

practical lovers; planners, logical

eros lovers?

romantic lovers; starry-eyed, idealistic

circumscribing stage?

spend less time talking; ignore differences

terminating stage?

stay friends or end contact

What are the 6 types of romantic love? (SAMPLE)

storge, agape, mania, pragma, ludus, eros

Maintenance strategies; acceptance?

support and forgiveness; accept who they are and forgive their flaws

Key element of romantic relationships; choice?

we choose our partners

In terms of physical attractiveness, how is the term 'matching' relevant?

we tend to form long-term relationships with people who are similar to us in physical attractiveness