COMMUNICATIONS

Rigid Verbal messages

"I'm always right!" - Hannah Flansburg

The 5 characteristics of communication

1. (Aware) of communication with yourself and others 2. Effectually use and interpret (verbal) messages 3. Effectually us and interpret (nonverbal) messages 4. (Listen and respond) thoughtfully to others 5. Appropriately (adapt) messages to others

What are the 3 stages of the perception process?

1. Attention and Selection 2. Organization 3. Interpretation Example: 1. Watching tv and you hear laughter, then choosing to ignore the tv to listen more closely to where the laughter is coming from. 2. Realizing th laughter is coming from your sister who is on the phone. 3. Further realizing that you sister is talking to her boyfriend because she only laughs like that around him.

Components of Self-Concept

1. Attitude: What you're most likely to change. Likes/Dislikes 2. Beliefs: How you structure reality. True/ False 3. Value: Least likely to change. Concept of Right/ Wrong

Concrete vs Abstract

1. Concrete: Meaning that refers to something that can b perceived with one of the senses. see, touch, smell, taste, or hear it. 2. Abstract: Can't be experience with ones senses. Love. Wonder. Freedom.

Difference between connotative and denotative

1. Connotative: Personal meaning of a word. You think about a certain word and how it relates in your life. 2. Denotative: Literal meaning.

Five ways words have power

1. Create and label experiences 2. Communicate feelings 3. Affect thoughts and actions: certain names affect how we think of them. 4. Shape culture 5. Make and break relationships

What affects self esteem?

1. Gender 2. Social Comparisons 3. Self Expectations 4. Self Fulfilling prophecy

What are 3 ways to improve your perception skills?

1. Increase Awareness 2. Avoid Stereotypes 3. Check your perceptions

Know the difference between Interpersonal, Impersonal, Group, and Presentational communication

1. Interpersonal: helps strengthen relationships. treating others like a one of a kind human 2. Impersonal: treat people as objects. Ex. Asking a waitress for more water. 3. Group: collection of people who have a common goal and influence each other. 4. Presentational: Speaker addresses a gathering of people to inform them.

How do we develop Self-Concept?

1. Our communication with others. (other's perceptions) 2. Association with groups. Ex. Choir, Band, Yearbook 3. Roles we assume. Ex. Mother, Daughter, 4. Self Labels: terms we use to describe ourselves

What positively affects Self Esteem?

1. Positive Self Talk 2. Visualization seeing yourself succeed 3. Reframe: look at the big picture. (failing one business calc test does not make you stupid or mean you're going to fail at life)

3 Barriers to listening

1.Self barrier- Emotional noise, criticizing the person your talking to in your head (mind wander) 2Info processing- Information overload Shifting attention,cultural differences, and Receiver apprehension- fear of not understanding the info like in calculus, 3Context barrier- environment not fit for listening ie too early, noisy, or cold(get tired and lose focus)

The 6 Functions of nonverbal communication

1Substitute for verbal messages (middle finger can represent FU) 2Complement verbal messages (using your middle finger while saying FU) 3Contradict verbal messages (Using your middle finger, but saying I love you) 4Repeating verbal messages (Saying four then holding up the number 4 on your hands) 5Regulating conversation (keeping eye contact lets the other person know you want to continue communicating) 6Accenting verbal messages (why are you SLEEPING in my class!)

How to respond with empathy 4 steps

1Understand feelings 2ask appropriate questions 3paraphrase message content- summarize message 4paraphrase their emotions- summaraize what are they feeling

Superior Verbal Messages

Acting superior to an other individual

Non Verbals are Continuous

Always happening

Non Verbal Codes

Appearance Body Movements* Gesture/posture* (*=Kinesics>affected by self esteem/emotional state) Eye contact Facial Expressions Haptics>touch Vocalics>pitch rate volume silence Physical Environment>shapes who you are Space (Personal Space) Territory(the seat you sit in>its not yours)

High context culture

Asian arab and southern europian nonverbal cues are very important

Flexible Verbal Messages

Be willing to admit your wrong

Genuine Verbal Messages

Be yourself, consider the uniqueness of each person

Uncertainty Culture

Comfortable with less info

What are the 3 models of communication?

Communication as action: source to receiver. no reply Communication as interaction: source to receiver and back Communication as transaction: constant flow

6 behavioral stages of intercultural communication competance

Denial (belief that the other cultures dont exist yours is the only one that's right) Defense (realize that other cultures exist but believe that theirs is the best) Minimization (treating all cultures the same and not adapting to the differences) Acceptance (acceptance of different cultures ways of behavior(ethnocentism deminishes) Adaptation Integration

Know difference between Indirect and Direct perception checking

Direct: Asking someone what they meant indirect: looking for cues to see if you're correct. Body lang etc

Equal Verbal Messages

Dont try to sound better than others

Controlling Verbal Messages

Example: "Take out the trash" is a command, instead say "would you mind helping me with the trash?"

NVC Rule Governed

Expectations for non verbal communication (not getting in someones personal space)

Short term orientation time culture

Focus on the history present value tradition

Empathetic Verbal Messages

Giving appropriate emotional feed back to the other person, try to understand what they are going through

Androgynous Traits

Having both masculine and feminine traits

Manipulative verbal messages

Having hidden agendas

Hearing vs listening

Hearing- not paying attention just acknowledging that there is something going on Listening- Really focusing on what the person is saying

Adaptor

Helps person addapt/ respond to a situation (nervous tics) like hannah scratching her thumb... bad girl

Collective Culture

High Values on communalism

What is the Sapir Whorf hypothesis?

Human language and thought are so interrelated that thought is actually rooted and controlled by language. You can't grasp something you don't have a word for.

Self Concept

Interior identity of who you think you are. The way we describe ourselves to others.

Evaluative Verbal Messages

Message that Evaluates what the other persons doing (attacking them)

Descriptive Verbal Messages

Message that describes how you feel to the other person (lets the other person know what they've done wrong by how you feel)

Feminine approach to commmunication

More Expressive, connecting with other, Quality of relationships and have more attention to nonverbal Men communicate to report women communicate to build rapport

Masculine approach to communication

More instrumental- focus on assertiveness, content, and have more attention to verbal than nonverbal

Illustrators

NV behavior that accompanies a verbal message that compliments/accents/contradicts the verbal message

Affect Display

NV behavior that communicates emotion. Face shows kind of emotion and the body shows how much

Emblems

NV code that has specific understood meaning in a given culture that substitutes for a word or prhrase (putting finger over your mouth to tell people to be quiet)

Non verbals are multi channeled

Non verbals cues register on our senses from a variety of sources simultaneously, you can only attend to one non verbal at a time.

Regulator

Nonverbal behavior that helps control the interaction or level of communication between people. Shows eagerness to participate.

Certainty Culture

Not comfortable with little info, want to be in the know

NVC Ambiguous

Not expressing non verbals clearly(stone cold face)

Centralized culture

Power is in the hands of a few people

Decentralized Culture

Power spread out through gov and organizations

5 barriers to bridging communication differences

Prejudice assuming superiority assuming similarity assuming differences stereotyping

4 Types of Litening Styles

Relational- emotions Analytical- facts, with hold judgement Critical- Facts, focus on accuracey and errors Task oriented- focus on taking action and problem solving

Components of communications process

Source- encodes Receiver- decodes Message Channel Noise Feedback Context: communication environment. physical, historical, psycological

Detached Verbal Messages

Stone faced, no emotion towards the other person

Masculine Culture

Value achievement, heroism, wealth, traditional sex roles

Feminine culture

Value relationships and caring for others

Bypassing language

When the same word means different things to different people.

Long term orientation time culture

Work towards the future, Value perseverance and thrift

Self Esteem

Your assessment of your worth as reflected in your perception of such things as skills, abilities, talents, and appearance.

Intercultural communication competance

being able to adapt your behavior in ways that are appropriate to other peoples culture

Individualistic Culture

focus on individual achievement

Problem Solving Verbal Messages

help them solve the problem don't tell them to solve the problem Example: "What seems to be the problem?" can lead to you helping them solve the problem where as "This is how you do it" is commanding and not helpful

NVC culture bound

in different cultures signs and symbols can mean different things

Space- put in order personal, public, intimate, social

intimate(hug) personal(close conversation) social(with classmates in school) public(giving a speech in an auditorium)

Low Context Cultures

north america, scandinavia and germany focus on language

Non verbals are Non linguistic

not conforming to language (they don't always mean the same thing)

5 steps of listening

selecting attending understanding remembering responding

4 forms of human diversity

sex and gender- sexuality is learned and socially reinforced Sexual orientation- gay straigh and transgender Age Ethnicity

Gunnysacking?

using someone's past mistakes and referring to them in a current situation.