Friends w/ Guns: LEAH

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JOSH: So build a table then. Not a weapon of mass destruction!

He actually built this table.

JOSH: These people?

He doesn't mean it like that.

DANNY: Bought the parts and custom built it.

He likes to build things.

JOSH: We should do something. Like all go to a park and picnic. Let the kids play in the trees all day somewhere in Topanga or something.

I am in love with that idea.

DANNY: I put a movie on for them. THey're fine.

Is a movie okay?

DANNY: That was a joke.

Jesus, seriously.

JOSH: You guys have plans for Labor day?

Labor day?

SHANNON: You have guns in your home and you didn't tell me?

Let's all just take a breath-

SHANNON: Really?

Of course, Mama.

SHANNON: I know.

Terrible joke.

DANNY: Funny joke.

The kids are too quiet.

JOSH: Yeah.

Uh... nothing planned yet.

DANNY: I don't like your tone.

We have a couple of rifles for hunting and skeet shooting, we have a few different pistols that we take to the indoor range for target practice and Danny has his collection of antique long guns...

SHANNON:I mean... I mean.... we just... we're not...

We're not crazy gun nuts or anything like that. We're responsible gun owners. I grew up with them. I'm all for appropriate gun control. I am. I'm for common sense gun laws. And also I support the second amendment.

SHANNON: Yes. That's my point.

What movie did you say the kids are watching Danny?

JOSH: No.

Would it help if we showed you the safe so that you could see for yourself?

JOSH: I mean... guns. No.

You're freaking out.

SHANNON: Thank you for a lovely evening.

We're still on for yoga tomorrow, right?

JOSH: Or trump voters.

**** no.

DANNY: Yep. There it is.

AR doesn't stand for assault rifle. That's a common misconception.

DANNY: Don't apologize.

I'm not.

JOSH: Nah, I'm good.

One for me too, please.

SHANNON: I'm just going to say it out loud because I couldn't be more please: This is going so well.

So well.

DANNY: My favorite is my Springfield Model 1855 musket

And...

DANNY: Of course I ****ing looked. I have to look. This is life. This is childbirth. I have to look. Am I right?

Are you guys cold? It's really cooled off.

JOSH: We're gonna take a pass.

Are you sure?

SHANNON: What does it stand for?

Armalite rifle. Armalite was the company that first made them.

SHANNON: You hunt?

Danny used to. In Montana.

DANNY: Okay cool. They're watching Texas CHainsaw Massacre. Seem to really love it.

Danny! He's kidding.

JOSH: Because they're awesome? I think it's time to go.

Danny, don't be a dick.

SHANNON: I'm okay.

Danny, will you...

DANNY: A gun is a tool. It's a machine. Machines aren't moral or immoral. They aren't capable of choice. They're metal and plastic. They aren't good or bad. They just are.

Danny.

DANNY: Except for the one I have holstered.

Danny.

DANNY: So you're a take em all away kinda guy?

Danny.

DANNY: the point you were trying to make was about-

Danny.

DANNY: This is so ****ing typical.

Danny. Shut up.

SHANNON: it's really so lovely out here. Like a little vacation. I showed this house a few times, you know.

Dd you?

SHANNON: I am so glad you movied into our neighborhood. I am so happy we met.

Me too.

JOSH: You have guns?! Our kids are alone in the next room and tou have guns in oyur house??

Not in the house. They're in the garage in a safe.

SHANNON: I'm sorry. it;s late. We should really get the kids to bed.

Please don't let this come between us. There's no reason-

DANNY: I was gonna get you one, baby. The best one for you. You're getting the cashmere blanket, my queen.

Thank you, baby.

DANNY: What a relief. So you guys spank your kids too?

That's not funny, Danny.

DANNY: Locked up. Kids don't even know we have gyns. We don't take them out around them.

They're in a safe within a safe in the garage.

SHANNON: Maybe.

They're not loaded. We store the ammunition separate from the guns.

JOSH: Special occasions.

This is definitely a special occasion, no?


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