Interpersonal Final

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What are the three types of social support?

1. Emotional 2. Informational 3. Instrumental

What are the dimensions of intimacy?

1. Emotional 2. Intellectual 3. Physical 4. Shared activities

What are the love styles?

1. Eros 2. Storge 3. Ludus 4. Pragma 5. Mania 6. Agape

What are the four responses to conflict?

1. Exit 2. Neglect 3. Loyalty 4. Voice

What are the internal pressures on friendship?

1. relational dialectics 2. diverse communication styles 3. sexual attraction

How does appearance influence relationship formation?

A primary factor Beyond being physically appealing Do they look friendly? Could you have a conversation with them? Do you find them attractive? First impression may influence secondary impressions Physical factors become less important as the relationship develops

What is a family?

A system with two or more interdependent people who have a common history, present reality, and expectations for the future

What is the triangular theory of love?

A theory proposing that love has three basic components 1. passion 2. intimacy 3. commitment

What is a friendship?

A voluntary relationship that provides social support

What is the voice conflict response?

Address conflict directly and attempts to resolve it

What is the quality time love language?

Being present/available; undivided attention

What is not owning feelings?

Blaming another person for our feelings, even though often we are responsible for what we feel. Ex: "You make me angry."

Give an example of a physiological emotional reaction

Body temperature increasing

What is the grave-dressing process in the deterioration of a romantic relationship?

Burying the relationship and accepting its end

What is emotional closeness in a friendship?

Can be through dialogue (communication is the centerpiece of friendship) or through doing (doing things together and for one another)

How is geographic distance an external pressure on friendships?

Challenge of distance between friends

What is the encouraging independence part of the family life cycle?

Children grow up and seek greater autonomy

What is the launching part of the family life cycle?

Children leave home, or may come back

What is the Storge love style?

Comfortable, even-keeled kind of love based on friendship and compatibility

What is the acts of service love language?

Completing chores or tasks for someone

What is the words of affirmation love language?

Compliments, words of praise

What is trust in a friendship?

Confidence others will be dependable and care about us. It develops gradually, in degrees.

What is the enlarging of family part of the family life cycle?

Couple adds children to the family, which creates new and challenging dynamics

What is the retirement part of the family life cycle?

Couples must adjust to life not centered around work; may be able to enjoy addition of grandchildren

What is the post-launching of children part of the family life cycle?

Couples must redefine their relationship; may cause happiness or dissatisfaction

What is productive conflict communication?

Creates a supportive, positive relationship that increases possibility of resolving differences without harming relationship

What is the commitment stage in the growth of a romantic relationship?

Decision to stay with the relationship, the expectation to invest more in their relationship

What are framing rules?

Define the emotional meaning of situations

What is the neglect conflict response?

Denies or minimizes problems that could lead to overt conflict

What is the mania love style?

Devise games and tests for potential partners and experience emotional extremes

How does complementary influence relationship formation?

Differences can strengthen a relationship if they satisfy the other's needs

How are diverse communication styles an internal pressure on friendship?

Different ways to communicate via social or cultural groups

What is low vs. high disclosure friendship?

Do you talk a lot about deep emotional/personal subjects, or not at all?

What is infrequent vs frequent contact friendship?

Do you talk often, or rarely?

What is a short vs. long term friendship?

Do you want the friendship to be fleeting, or to last?

What is shared activity intimacy?

Doing things together

What is the eros love style?

Erotic love - Powerful, passionate style of love that blazes to life suddenly and dramatically

What is the explorational communication stage in the growth of a romantic relationship?

Escalation of romance, learning about each other, reduce uncertainty to see if romance could work

What is the family life cycle?

Establishing a family Enlarging a family Developing a Family Encouraging Independence Launching Children Post launching of Children Retirement

What is physical intimacy?

Exchanging important ideas

What is support in a friendship?

Expect friends to support us - listening, helping with problems, being available

What is counterfeit emotional language?

Expressing emotion without describing feeling, can feel descriptive, but isn't. Ex: "Why can't you leave me alone?"

What is conformity orientation?

Extent to which family members are expected to adhere to hierarchy and conform in beliefs

Give an example of a nonverbal emotional reaction

Facial expressions

How do we define families?

Families are defined by interaction rather than biology

What is intimacy?

Feelings of closeness, bondedness, connectedness

What is intimacy in the triangular theory of love?

Feelings of connection, closeness, tenderness

What happens in the early stage of unproductive conflict?

First 3 minutes are most important - will set the stage for how conflict is managed

What makes committed romantic relationships unique?

Includes romantic and sexual feelings, and is a primary and enduring part of one's life

What are the 6 steps to the growth of romantic relationships?

Individuality Invitational Communication Explorational Communication Intensifying Communication Revising Communication Commitment

What are committed romantic relationships?

Individuals who assume that they will be primary and continuing parts of each other's lives

What is the initial meeting friendship stage?

Initial meeting is first stage of interaction and possibly friendship. Often awkward and uncertain.

What is passion in the triangular theory of love

Intensely positive feelings and desires for another person

What is the stabilized friendship stage?

Interact and disclose more, shared experiences with expectations of acceptance, responsiveness, continuity

What are the 5 steps of the deterioration of a romantic relationship?

Intrapsychic Process Dyadic Process: Social Support Grave-Dressing Process Resurrection Process

What is high vs. low obligation friendship?

Is your friend a large commitment, or not?

How can social media impact romantic relationships?

It can help us maintain connection with partners, and many relationships start online. It is an indicator of commitment is making an effort to communicate regularly. Too much may cross connection-autonomy boundary. Social media is also blamed for relational cheating, breakups, divorce, cyberstalking. Too much online communication may lead to the inability to manage conflict and assert thoughts effectively

What is a protective communication pattern in families?

High conformity, low conversation

What is a consensual communication pattern in families?

High conversation, high conformity

What is a pluralistic communication pattern in families?

High conversation, low conformity

What is conversation orientation?

How open or closed communication is

How can we manage our emotions?

How we feel about events, rather than the event itself, is what causes emotion.

How does competency influence relationship formation?

Like to be around talented people, hoping it wil rub off on us Uncomfortable around people who are too competent - we want some flaws

How does proximity influence relationship formation?

Likely to develop relationships with those who we interact frequently with Proximity can lead to liking Geographic proximity vs. virtual proximity

What is the avoidance conflict style?

Lose-Lose, When people ignore or stay away from conflict through physical or conversational means

What is the accommodation conflict style?

Lose-Win, When one person allows the other to have their way rather than asserting their own point of view

How do social and professional roles influence emotion?

May discourage direct expression of emotions

What is the physical touch love language?

Meaningful touch

How do traditional gender roles influence emotion?

Men and women expreience the same emotions, but express them differently

What is the developing of family part of the family life cycle?

Parent-child relationships develop and have impact on their child

What is the revising communication stage in the growth of a romantic relationship?

Partners come out of the clouds to look at relationships more realistically (may not always happen)

What is the social support process in the deterioration of a romantic relationship?

Partners look to friends and family for support

How does social media influence emotion?

People may express more emotion online than in person, "protection" behind a screen -- being anonymous online can promote outbursts

What is the resurrection process in the deterioration of a romantic relationship?

People move on with their lives without the other

What is the Invitational communication stage in the growth of a romantic relationship?

People signal they are interested in interacting

What is intellectual intimacy?

Physical touch

What happens in the middle stages of productive conflict?

Positive groundwork supports what happens as people dig into issues

What is the pragma love style?

Practical love with clear criteria for partners

What is relational culture?

Private world of rules, understandings,meanings, and patterns of acting and interpreting that partnerscreate

What is placemaking?

Process of creating a comfortable personal environment that reflects the couple

What happens in the late stage of unproductive conflict?

Proposals met with counterproposals - more interested in pushing our own solution

What is the agape love style?

Put another's happiness ahead of their own without any expectation of reciprocity

What is emotional labeling?

Putting words to describe our feelings helps us understand them; our labels for our physiological responses influence how we interpret those responses

What is unproductive conflict communication?

Reflects a preoccupation with oneself and disregard for others

What is emotional intimacy?

Sharing important information and feelings

What is emotional support?

Showing empathy and care to someone's situation

How does similarity influence relationship formation?

Similarity Thesis: The more similar, the more likely we are to form a relationship

What is the fledgling friendship stage?

Small self-disclosure or seeing each other outside of regular context. Many friendships don't move past this.

How do rewards influence relationship formation?

Social Exchange Theory: Seeking out those who can give rewards greater or equal to the costs (Rewards - Costs = Outcome)

What are the ineffective ways we express emotion?

Speaking in generalities, not owning feelings, and counterfeit emotional language

What is the loyalty conflict response?

Staying committed to a relationship despite differences

What is task oriented vs. maintenance oriented friendship?

Task means the friendship revolves around certain activities, maintenance is grounded in liking and social support.

How does self-disclosure influence relationship formation?

Telling others important information about ourselves helps build relationships Learn how others are similar through disclosure Increasing liking because it indicates regard

What is emotional intelligence?

The ability to recognize feelings, to judge which feelings are appropriate in which situations, and to communicate those feelings effectively

What is the dyadic process in the deterioration of a romantic relationship?

The breakdown of established patterns,rules, rituals that make up the relational culture; may include discussions about problems

What is the openness/closedness relational dialectic?

The conflict between open communication and privacy

What is the receiving gifts love language?

The thought that counts, not the thing itself

What are the three relational dialectics?

autonomy/connection novelty/predictability openness/closedness

What are the external pressures on friendships?

competing demands, personal changes, geographic distance

What are the four family communication patterns

consensual, pluralistic, protective, laissez-faire

What is the establishing of family part of the family life cycle?

couple settles into a committed relationship

What is instrumental support?

doing a task or favor to help

What is informational support?

giving information to help

What is the exit conflict response?

hysically walking out or psychologically withdrawing

What is a lassiez faire communication pattern in families?

low conformity, low conversation

What are relational dialectics?

opposing forces, or tensions, that are continuous

What are the guidelines for expressing emotions?

1) Recognize your feelings. 2) Choose the best language 3) Share multiple feelings. 4) Recognize the difference between feeling and acting 5) Accept responsibility for your feelings. 6) Choose the best time and place to express your feelings 7) Respond sensitively when others communicate emotions

What are the 5 conflict styles?

1. Avoidance 2. Accommodation 3. Competition 4. Compromise 5. Collaboration

How do friendships grow and develop?

1. Initial meeting 2. Fledgling friendship 3. Stabilized friendship becomes more important

What are conflict management skills?

1. Listen mindfully 2. Attend to the relationship level of meaning (vs. just content level) 3. Take responsibility for your thoughts, feelings, and issues 4. Check perceptions 5. Look for points of agreement 6. Time conflict appropriately 7. Look for ways to preserve the other's face 8. Imagine how you'll feel in the future

What are the principles of conflict?

1. Natural in most Western Relationships 2. Cultural/Social groups shape meaning 3. May be expressed overtly and covertly

What are the different types of friendships?

1. Short vs. Long Term 2. Task vs. Maintenance Oriented 3. Low vs. High Disclosure 4. High vs. Low Obligation 5. Infrequent vs. Frequent Contact

What is emotion work?

An effort to generate what we think are appropriate feelings

What is conflict?

An expressed tension between people who are: interdependent, perceive they have incompatible goals, and feel a need to resolve those differences

What is commitment in the triangular theory of love?

An intention to remain in the relationship

What are the influences on relationship formation?

Appearance, Similarity, Complementary, Rewards, Competency, Proximity, Self-disclosure

What happens in the later stages of productive conflict?

Attention shifts to resolving tension through dual perspective, negotiation and contracting

What happens in the early stages of productive conflict?

Foundation set far before conflict ever occurs

What are the cultural influences on emotion?

Framing rules, feeling rules, and emotion work

How are relational dialectics an internal pressure on friendship?

Friendships can be strained when people have different needs

How are personal changes an external pressure on friendships?

Friendships change as our lives do. Example: If you're the first member of your friend group to have a kid.

How are competing demands an external pressure on friendship?

Friendships exist within larger social systems that affect how they function

What is speaking in generalities?

Generally describing how one feels without communicating their emotions. Ex: "I'm fine" Using a limited emotional vocabulary limits our abilities of self-understanding.

What is social support?

Helping others during challengeing times by providing support. In showing others they aren't alone, they feel valued.

What happens in the middle stage of unproductive conflict?

Negative climate is stoked by other unconstructive communication

What is the compromise conflict style?

Negotiated Lose-Lose, Gives both people at least some of what they want, but both sacrifice part of their goals

Is social support always helpful?

No, social support isn't helpful when too much support is offered, or the wrong type of support is provided.

How is sexual attraction an internal pressure on friendship?

One or both may be attracted to other; may threaten friendship

What is the intrapsychic process in the deterioration of a romantic relationship?

One or both partners start to feel dissatisfied with relationship and focus on problems

What are emotions?

Our experiences and interpretation of internal sensations that are shaped by physiology, perceptions, language, and social experiences

What is self talk

The nonverbal, inner monologue that is our process of thinking

How do we navigate romantic relationships?

The ongoing process of staying committed and living a life together despite ups and downs

How does emotional contagion influence emotion?

The process by which emotions are transferred from one person to another. Some people are more susceptible than others

What are relationship rules?

Unspoken understandings that regulate how people interact

What is the Ludus love style?

View love as a game, scheming, puzzles, commitment avoidance

What is the invitational communication stage in the growth of a romantic relationship?

View themselves as a couple, immerse themselves in their relationship, and idealize their partner (aka honeymoon)

What is acceptance in a friendship?

We expect that our friends will accept us, flaws and all.

What is the individuality stage in the growth of a romantic relationships?

We have needs/goals, love styles, identities, personal histories that affect what we look for in relationships

what is the novelty/predictability relational dialectic?

We want familiarity in our relationships, but also newness

What is the connection/autonomy relational dialectic?

We want to be close with others, but also want independence

What are feeling rules?

What we have a right to feel, or are expected to feel

How do friendships deteriorate?

When one or both friends stop investing in friendship it is likely to wane. It is more common for friendships to wane gradually. When friendship declines, there is a change in communication with a decreased quantity and quality of communication

How does personality influence emotion?

Who we are can be powerful forces in the experience and communication of emotions

What is involved in the nature of friendships?

Willingness to invest, emotional closeness, acceptance, trust, support

What is the competition conflict style?

Win-Lose, Assumes that one person will win at the expense of the other

What is the collaboration conflict style?

Win-Win, Seeking win-win solutions to conflict, thus satisfying the need of everyone without compromising anything

What are love languages?

Words of Affirmation Quality Time Receiving Gifts Acts of Service Physical Touch

What is willingness to invest in a friendship?

You want to know that someone wants to spend time with you and have meaningful conversations. You can invest time, energy, or resources.


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